Yoda vs. Dumbledore is a What-If? Death Battle featuring Master Yoda from the Star Wars franchise and Albus Dumbledore from the Harry Potter franchise. This page was created by WarpyNeko930, abandoned and adopted by GalacticAttorney and has now been been adopted by Big the Cat 10.
Description[]
Star Wars vs. Harry Potter! Two REALLY old headmasters with supernatural powers fight! Will this be another triumph for Star Wars over Harry Potter?
Intro[]
Wiz: Teenage hotshot hero? Check. Evil villain? Check. Magical powers? Check.
Boomstick: Old-as-shit sage running all of the events from a comfy sofa someplace? Check.
Wiz: The age-old mentors in fiction are as big a cliche as prophecies and mythical beasts, and none of them come as more powerful than this.
Boomstick: Master Yoda, the greatest Jedi teacher in the Galaxy...
Wiz: And Albus Dumbledore, the most powerful sorcerer in the world and headmaster at Hogwarts school.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle
Yoda[]
Wiz: Master Yoda is the wisest, cleverest, most powerful Jedi in the Galaxy's ancient history, but the details of his past remain an utter mystery, as do his family and planet of origin.
Boomstick: The craziest rumor is that Yoda, when he was little, didn't know he was a force sensitive at all!
Wiz: Nor did the Jedi who joined him on his journey from his home planet. His ship was hit by an asteroid, and he spent weeks in space, without knowing where he's going, with his life support systems on a knife's edge.
Boomstick: This apparently taught Yoda that life is too short to wait for someone to cover your ass.
Wiz: When he soon came to the Jedi Temple, he developed as a Jedi incredibly fast, becoming an extraordinaire in lightsaber combat and force manipulation alike.
Boomstick: And, damn, this guy is old! Seriously, he is NINE HUNDRED FREAKING YEARS OLD! And he is one serious son of a bitch!
Yoda: Secret, shall I tell you? Grand Master of Jedi Order am I. Won this job in a raffle I did, think you? 'How did you know, how did you know, Master Yoda?' Master Yoda knows these things. His job it is.
Wiz: Practically every single Jedi who became great over the next nine-hundred years trained under the brilliant tutelage of Master Yoda. He even trained Count Dooku, who turned out to be one of the Jedi's greatest betrayals but still an extremely powerful being, all because of Yoda's teachings.
Boomstick: Sadness aside, despite looking like a tiny, green stick insect in a dressing gown, Yoda is one of the most awesome fighters of all time!
Wiz: Yoda is one of the precious few warriors to have completely mastered and even perfected all forms of lightsaber combat. Still, he prefers Form IV Ataru, which specializes in acrobatics...
Boomstick: And you'd think that his tininess would make this style really tricky for little old Yoda... but don't worry, because Yoda, despite being bite-sized, Yoda is insanely fast, strong, and can jump high enough to leap several floors of a building in one bound and perform one thousand somersaults at once. Yes, I bet you didn't know that this little green elf was a ninja!
Wiz: Yoda is fantastically lethal in battle, and can fight his way through a super battalion of battle droids without sustaining a single injury or ounce of exhaustion, and withstand immense amounts of electricity and get up seconds later.
Boomstick: Despite being as awesome as shit, Yoda is one pragmatic bastard when it comes to warfare.
Luke Skywalker: I'm looking for a great warrior.
Yoda: Great warrior? Wars do not make one great.
Wiz: Yoda is a pacifist and has a firm respect for all life around him. He has traveled across the Galaxy, visiting millions of planets to better his connection to the Force. This means he has good relationships with several strange species, particularly the Wookies.
Boomstick: Yoda has the most awesome Force powers of all time: he can talk to animals, telepathically communicate with and control even the most badass of minds, create shockwaves that rip entire cities apart, and even hold his own against Darth Sidious, who is powerful enough to rip entire space stations apart with a flick of his wrist.
Wiz: This specific power is Tutaminis: it is the ability to absorb incredible amounts of offensive power and redirect it through the hands. It is incredibly difficult to master, and even harder to utilize in battle situations. Yoda can also utilize the Force to see the future and determine the outcome of the battle.
Boomstick: Yoda is the only Jedi Master, Knight or Padawan to have escaped Order 66 and live out the rest of his life without the Empire or Darth Vader pissing him off.
Wiz: Yoda spent the minority of the rest of his life on the swamp planet of Dagobah, and never directly interfered with the deeds of Vader or the Emperor ever again. However, he did train Luke Skywalker in the ways of the Force and observed the outcomes of their lives from afar.
Boomstick: Yoda is so powerful, though, I'm scared to think what he will see if he ever turned to the Dark Side. Honestly, though, I don't really see that happening.
Yoda: Fear is the path to the Dark Side - fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering.
Wiz: Yoda is incredibly fearless, and will stand up for anyone, no matter their galactic ethnicity or allegiance. He really is the wisest, most powerful Jedi of all time.
Luke: I... I don't believe it.
Yoda: ...That is why you fail.
Dumbledore[]
Wiz: Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore was born in summer 1881 in Mould-on-the-Wolde, England, as the eldest of three siblings - Ariana, and Aberforth Dumbledore.
Boomstick: Damn, this guy is old.
Ron: About a hundred and fifty....give or take a few years.
Wiz: He went to Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and became an enormously powerful wizard very quickly. He made a great many friends, when tragedy struck.
Boomstick: Turns out, his sister Ariana liked to play with magic - no, not that kind of magic! - in her back yard, and a bunch of peeping toms watched her play from over the hedge, and one day they climbed over the hedge to ask her to perform certain kinds of magic...and when she couldn't, they beat the crap out of her.
Wiz: She was traumatized by this attack, physically and mentally, and completely lost conscious control over her incredible magical powers. Meanwhile, Dumbledore was busy excelling brilliantly at Hogwarts, whilst his family fell into turmoil. His father even went to prison, but he carried on - people started thinking that he didn't care about them.
Boomstick: But the truth was a very different matter. See, dear old Albie was enticed by the deadly charisma of Gellert Grindelwald, a super-psychotic despot with a secret plan to take over the world.
Wiz: Gellert Grindelwald was a brilliant and powerful wizard, quite like Dumbledore, and was obsessed with obtaining the Deathly Hallows.
Boomstick: The Elder Wand, which gives the owner awesome magical powers that trump any and all other magical beings and substances.
Wiz: The Cloak of Invisibility, to hide one from his enemies.
Boomstick: And the Ressurection Stone, to bring back old ex-girlfriends from the dead.
Wiz: The relationship between Dumbledore and Grindelwald, two of the greatest wizards of their time, drew him even further away from his family. At one point, Aberforth Dumbledore crossed the path between the two sorcerers and Grindelwald attacked him.
Boomstick: Dumbledore, being a badass, stepped in front of his brother and battled his old mate. However, his sister tried to intervene and a curse was cast - by whom is unknown - which killed her stone dead. Damn, that's brotherly compassion right there!
Wiz: Gellert fled after the sister's death and started building his army to take over the world, so Dumbledore went after him and then began the greatest wizard duel of all time.
Boomstick: It turns out, after fleeing like a complete wuss from Dumbledore and his brother, old Grindelwald had obtained the Elder Wand and was now invincible...but Dumbledore beat him all the same.
Wiz: Dumbledore, it seems, was a shade more skillful than his opponent. He obtained the wand for himself, but didn't start any world-domination or mass-murdering plan. He dedicated the rest of his entire life to teaching at Hogwarts, and soon fighting Lord Voldemort.
Boomstick: Whom, funnily enough, had been trained by Dumbledore himself.
Wiz: By the time Harry met him, Dumbledore was over one hundred years old and a hugely respected and powerful member of the wizarding community.
Boomstick: Speaking of powers, Dumbledore is one of the most OP bastards in wizarding history. He can create cages of water strong enough to contain giants and deflect curses, explode one hundred thousand explosions in a thousand different places at once, teleport over freaking huge distances whilst blocking any attempt at tracking him, and, like most badass wizards, create huge infernos of golden fire.
Wiz: Dumbledore is so powerful that the likes of Professor Severus Snape respect him to an extreme...
Snape: Dumbledore is a great wizard, only a fool would question it!
Boomstick: And, as we all know, Snape doesn't fuck around.
Wiz: Dumbledore has created a Patronus charm so advanced that it can actually speak and attack enemies. He can also read minds with pure ease, whilst protecting his own even more, levitate people with a wave of his hand, and even animate statues so that they follow his every whim.
Boomstick: Dumbledore is also a freaking genius - he literally plans out nearly every single detail that happens in the series. He doesn't suffer fools gladly.
Wiz: Dumbledore is, and always will be, the greatest sorcerer of all time!
Dumbledore: It was foolish of you to come here tonight, Tom. The Aurors are on their way.
Pre-DEATH BATTLE[]
DEATH BATTLE![]
Conclusion[]
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