Description[]
Doctor Who vs Dragon Ball Heroes! Wiz & Boomstick invite you to a time-bending match for the ages!
Intro[]
Boomstick: You know Wiz, nerd shit aside, time travel in it's core is among the coolest concepts of science-fiction!
Wiz: That's right, Boomstick! & today we are pitting up two of the best time travellers out there. They can even give Doc Brown a run for his money.
Boomstick: Damn.
Wiz: The Doctor, the runaway Time Lord of many faces.
Boomstick: & Trunks Briefs, the time cop of the Xenoverse. He's Wiz & I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: & It's our job to analyse their weapons, armour & skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle!
The Doctor walks into eternity on DEATH BATTLE![]
Wiz: The Gallifreyans, more commonly known as the Time Lords, were up there as the oldest, most powerful & omnipotent beings in the universe. Their technology were much more incredibly advanced than ours. They were most famous for the creation and attempted monopolisation of time travel technology.
Boomstick: Among them all was an old man so bored with all the laws & shit that he decided to run off with his granddaughter to go on wacky space adventures. I don't blame him though, Why join politics when you can become Mr. Peabody & Sherman on steroids!
Wiz: Not much is known about his history, only the adventures he embarked on. He has saved the cosmos time & time again. He is the one know only as... The Doctor!
Boomstick: ...WHAT?!!? That's it!??! That's his name?!!?
Wiz: Well... not exactly, it's just the name he likes to go by.
Boomstick: Then, what is his name then?
Wiz: I.... actually don't know. Don't think anyone here knows.
Boomstick: Well that's disappointing. (murmurs) Not like he has a PhD or anything...
Wiz: Actually he did at one point
Boomstick: GOD DAMMIT!
Wiz: Anyway, like I said, not much is known of his backstory. But on that faithful day when he & his teenage granddaughter Susan Foreman successfully stole a type 40 TARDIS. No one stopped them because the TARDIS was considered faulty & not that important.
Boomstick: & now with his magic space box, he has free access to anywhere & any when in all of time & space. Where better to go than Earth. London, 1963 specifically. I dunno he probably just liked it there. But then, Susan fucked up the whole thing by having 2 of her teachers follow her on board only to get launched into the stone age. Remind me never to have grandchildren!
Wiz: This was how the trip of a lifetime started! Prepare yourself for cheap 60s BBC budget ahoy!
Dalek: They are to be exterminated!
Wiz: His TARDIS, or Time And Relative Dimension In Space & now stuck as a mid 20th century police box, flies across all of time and space. But, it also has a few more tricks on its sleeve as it is dimensionally transcendental. While it can not change shape to match its surroundings anymore due to the chameleon circuit being damaged, it can still change the inside into what is desired and fits The Doctor’s style. Like a pocket dimension, “It’s bigger on the inside.”
Boomstick: Like Kirby's stomach!
Wiz: It can also translate alien languages of all species and receive them to others besides The Doctor. Has a tractor beam that can move planets, can heal itself out and in, change the weather, go out of sync with time, create barriers that can block higher beings, create 12-D Data maps, control explosions to cause paradoxes, and durable to survive black holes, and supernovas.
Boomstick: Damn! This thing is unstoppable!
Wiz: Sadly not Boomstick, as beings like the Quantum Archangel can overpower it even with shields.
Boomstick: Ahh... Always has to be a catch!
Wiz: His primary tool is the Sonic Screwdriver. Capable of unlocking anything that isn't deadlocked or wooden for some reason, hacking into any, & I mean ANY type of technology, scanning information from anyone & anything he comes across & so much more.
Boomstick: It's literally a space swiss army knife! But much more dangerous...
Wiz: The seemingly blank psychic paper can fool any random person into seeing what he wants him or her to believe
Boomstick: I can have a lot of fun with that one...
Wiz: The unbreakable chains are forged from a dwarf star's heart & are... well, unbreakable. The invisibility watch can obviously turn him invisible. The writer's block can trap any poor soul in status & the De-Mat Gun can erase it's targets from reality if aimed correctly.
Boomstick: Needless to say he's pretty damn versatile!
Wiz: But he's not all gadgets! As a Time Lord, he is a professional at technological engineering, biological expertise, philosophy & cosmology knowledge of the universe. He is also capable of telepathy, hypnosis, telekinesis & time sensitivity. He is also very skilled at a form of martial arts known as Venusian Aikido.
Boomstick: But perhaps his most well known ability is the one of regeneration.
Wiz: Ah, yes! The special ability found in all of the Time Lords. If a body has been exhausted to its limit via an illness, being wounded, or fallen out of old age, they will regenerate into a new body. While his physical appearance changes, the core of The Doctor still remains. It can also change both his race & gender!
Boomstick: Wiz, if he can swap genders, what happens to his dick? Does it like, disintegrate or fall off or...
Wiz: Boomstick! No body needs to know that! Anyway, the energy given out of regeneration is so powerful it can create shockwaves that can destroy entire spaceships!
Boomstick: The Doctor has lived through many, many regenerations. The old man became a discount Beatle, who then became Austin Powers if he had more nose than teeth, then he became the one your parents only remember, & so on, so fourth!
Wiz: Also, during the traumatic last great time war, he wielded the Moment, a weapon capable of destroying everything from that war with just a complicated puzzle & a big red button.
Boomstick: HOLY SHIT! Daleks & Time Lords just, BOOM! Genocide with one button, I love it!
Wiz: This is no ordinary man, he is both a saviour & a warrior! A hero & a criminal! He has lived through wars & genocides but still keeps his optimistic look on the universe!
Boomstick: He is the mother fucking Doctor!
10th Doctor: I'm The Doctor. I'm a Time Lord. I'm from the planet Gallifrey in the Constellation Of Kasterborous. I'm 903 years Old and I'm the man who's gonna save your lives and all 6 Billion people on the planet below. You got a problem with that?
Xeno Trunks patrols DEATH BATTLE![]
Boomstick: Soo... Everyone here knows who Trunks is, right? One of the coolest figgin' Dragon Ball characters out there! (hands up) Good! Everyone's cultured!
Wiz: In an alternate future where Goku died of a heart virus, two evil androids, 17 & 18, killed all the Z-Fighters and most of Earth‘s population. The only warriors to survive were Goku‘s son, Gohan, and Vegeta‘s child, Trunks. Over the course of 13 years, Gohan trained Trunks in martial arts and swordsmanship to stand against the two androids, sacrificing his life in the process.
Boomstick: Crazy, the stuff friendship can do to you!
Wiz: Years after this tragedy, Trunks' mother Bulma managed to build a time machine, and Trunks used it in the hopes of saving Goku and preventing their terrible future. When his mission was completed, Trunks returned to his time and obliterated the evil androids using what he learned in the past.
Boomstick: & the similarities to canon Trunks ends here as he was then arrested by a midget fairy chick!
Wiz: In actuality, he then got himself trapped in the Time Nest, where he was approached by Chronoa, the Supreme Kai of Time who watches over the Dragon Ball universe. She explained that his use of time travel was illegal, but sensing his lack of evil intent, Chronoa decided to have Trunks pay for his actions by recruiting him into the Time Patrol, an organization founded to defend as many timelines as possible from time-altering threats such as the Dark Empire. Under the Time Patrol, Trunks became one of their leading enforcers, becoming leagues stronger than he ever thought possible.
Boomstick: Welcome to Dragon Ball Heroes! Basically an alternate universe, wait, no, Xenoverse where everything in the Dragon Ball universe has it's own canon timeline. Basically the ultimate DBZ fanfiction! But official... It ROCKS!
Wiz: Despite it not being on his to-do list, Trunks was perfect for the role. He has the typical Saiyan ki powers such as Burning Canon, Galick Gun, Masenko & more, but he also wields the Brave Sword.
Boomstick: Basically a super awesome magic sword straight from the hero of time! But not the one you're thinking of...
Wiz: He also possesses the powers of the original Trunks due to living through some variation of the Goku Black Saga, including the golden forms of Super Saiyan 1, 2 & 3. Also, thanks to this armband, he & his time cops can go time warping without any alterations or distortions.
Boomstick: He can also create this ginormous fuck-off laser sword with the ki of other lifeforms!
Wiz: AKA The Sword of Hope. However, his best form is accomplished by performing a divine ritual to unlock godly ki within himself, making him into the all powerful red visage of Super Saiyan God!
Boomstick: Perfect for fighting off actual demons! Such as the time these fellas revived Mechikabura, the ruler of the Demon Realm, causing all sorts of distortions & shit all over the Xenoverse.
Wiz: Trunks is also an avid fan of the Dragon Ball Heroes arcade game, it essentially serves as another method of time travel, allowing future warriors to visit iconic moments in the past, complete with an assortment of collectible cards that can summon facsimiles of well-known characters.
Boomstick: Yup, Dragon Ball became Yu-Gi-Oh!
Wiz: Trunks also funded the Hero Switch, which means he can use his cards on the go. But sadly it was still not enough for Mechikabura.
Boomstick: Until he pulled out the deus ex machina to end all deus ex machinas, the Key Sword! Straight outta Kingdom Hearts!
Wiz: This thing isn't just a sword, as it can completely shut down the opponent's powers & trap them in the...
Boomstick: ETERNAL TIME LABYRINTH!!!!! God, I love saying that!
Wiz: The Eternal Time Labyrinth traps the targets in the Crack of Time, a bubble of reality outside all timelines with windows into others. Also, the key sword is powerful enough to destroy Mechikabura with a single strike!
Boomstick: Jesus! This puts him above canon Goku! You know, the one that can who could destroy the universe up to 13 times over when he first channeled Super Saiyan God!
Wiz: He has sparred with Beerus & Whis, defeated Frieza, Cooler, Androids 17 & 18, Demon God Demigra & Mira. Trained with Note & Beat, the former being the descended of the Goku from Dragon Ball GT.
Boomstick: & He also enjoys drinking HETAP, doesn't have too much relevance here but I just wanted to mention it,
Wiz: So, if you're planning on messing with time, don't count on succeeding!
Boomstick: Because Trunks & his team of time cops will always show up to protect the timelines!
Xeno Trunks: I promise you, Master; A peaceful future and a future of the past that you couldn't protect... I will protect every history.
Intermission[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set! We've run the data through all possibilities!
Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!!! through time.
Death Battle[]
Within the cold, black depths of space, a blue mid-20th century police box was flying about. But it wasn't a police box, it was the TARDIS & inside it was The Doctor, clacking away at the controls of the central console. Outside, the TARDIS was trying to avoid a barrage of energy blasts coming from an attacker from behind. That attacker was non other than Trunks Briefs, the Xenoverse time cop, slashing any obstacle with his signature sword. Inside, The Doctor looked into the TARDIS scanner to see what's going on.
The Doctor: Ooooh, not good. Not good at all...
He then clicked a few more buttons, making a temporal force field around the TARDIS. He then put on his brown ankle-length coat & peeked his head outside to talk to the time cop.
The Doctor: Hello there, what have I done this time?
Trunks: You're under arrest for unsanctioned & borderline illegal time travel!
The Doctor: (sighs) I knew shouldn't have shown Da Vinci the real last supper...
But the conversation didn't last long as Trunks shot out another barrage of Ki blasts at The Doctor, but the Time Lord was quick enough to run back inside. He pressed on a few more buttons until he pulled the leaver, when he did that, the long rotors began to push up & down. Outside, Trunks was trying to catch up with the ship when suddenly, it began to dematerialise. The son of Vegeta thought that this was his chance, so he rushed into the blue box, but it was too late as the TARDIS completely disappeared before his very eyes! Trunks then looked at his time travel arm band & began pressing a few buttons on it.
Trunks: So that's how you wanna do this, huh?
After pressing a few buttons, a yellow flash appeared from behind him & consumed him. The chase is on!
We cut to a wide blue field surrounded by trees & mountains. Above, was a bright, green sky with yellow is clouds. Back below, the TARDIS materialises on a random part of the field, coming out of one of the wooden doors was The Doctor, admiring the scenery.
The Doctor: Ahhh, Namek! Such a unique place, nothing else like it! Been meaning to go back some time. Now then, where do I star...
His admiration was then cut short when Trunks came from behind him & gave him a surprise attack that knocks him to the floor. The half-Saiyan then grabs out his brave sword.
The Doctor: Oh, come on...
Trunks: I suppose you've left me with no choice!
But before he could do anything with the sword, The Doctor rolled behind him & used a Venusian Aikido attack, just to put him down for a bit, but Trunks deflected the attack with his equally as skilled martial arts skills. The time cop then built up ki in his hands & aimed for the time lord.
Trunks: Masenko-Ha!
He shot out an energy blast, which The Doctor managed to dodge. The Doctor then pulled out his Sonic Screwdriver before waving it around Trunks.
The Doctor: (To himself) I'm detecting... Saiyan energy? Mmmm, it's not every century that you see one of those.
Trunks then flew towards the Time Lord & gave him a few good slashes with his sword, but The Doctor eventually manages to escape. He then snuck behind Trunks & pointed his Sonic Screwdriver at him again, but it was aimed at the time travel bracelet.
The Doctor: There you go! Now you can leave me alone! Sorry, must dash!
Trunks then checked his bracelet, he pressed a few buttons but this time, they didn't work! The Doctor has disabled it! He then rushed to the running time lord & gave him a fatal blow with his sword. The Doctor was left struggling on the floor. Trunks then gathered a whole lot of Ki energy in his hands.
Trunks: Now this is the end for you!
He was just about to unleash the final blow when he saw a glowing golden flame creeping onto The Doctor's skin. The Time Lord then struggled up & before Trunks' very eyes, his head & hands were completely engulfed into a burst of sun-like fire! The energy from the fire sent the time patroller flying through 3 whole mountains before recovering again.
When Trunks got back up, the fire had stopped & in it's place, The Doctor has returned but his facial features were completely unrecognisable to the man Trunks was fighting. He then looked around him in a fast pace.
The Doctor: Whoa! Face, arms, hands, fingers, feet, legs. No! Still not ginger!
Trunks just floated there, confused.
Trunks: …Ok, what?
He then tried to rush in another sword slash, but The new Doctor successfully deflected it. Trunks then assumed he had taken a stronger form, so he clenched his fists.
Trunks: You're a lot more durable then I thought! But see if you can overpower this! HUUUUUUURRAAAHHH!!!!
Golden waves of energy surrounded Trunks as he unleashes his equally as golden visage of the Super Saiyan. The Doctor was then knocked quite a distance, but he got up quickly.
The Doctor: Alright, you didn't need to shout!
He then scanned the energy with his Sonic Screwdriver.
The Doctor: Oh boy... Well then, Geronimo!
Both the Time Lord & the Time Cop sprinted towards each other, deflecting each other with their martial arts skills.
Trunks: How did you... Why?
The Doctor: Well, change let's say, & it seems not a moment too soon!
They both knocked each other away again. Just as Trunks was steading himself, he felt something in his coat pockets.
Trunks: Huh?
He then searched them only to find out that he still has a couple of Xeno card packs. He gave a wide eyed look.
Trunks: C'mon please, give me luck this time...
He quickly opened both packs & had a look at what he received.
Trunks: Oh! Surprisingly not bad this time!
He threw the cards &, using his Hero Switch, he smmoned GT Goku, Vegeta, Gohan, Gogeta, Shallot & DBS Broly. They all prepared themselves to finish off The Doctor.
Trunks: It's over for you! You're outnumbered!
The Doctor: Mmm, the ability to summon physical remnants of your own universe via trading card... Facinating!
The Saiyans then all went in on The Doctor with a barrage of recognisable Ki attacks, The Doctor had to be very athletic to dodge them. Despite getting badly beaten up by a lot of them, the Time Lord managed to escape. But then, he though up an idea!
The Doctor: Wait, no! Stupid idea! Why would you think that? Looks like it's my only option... Very well.
He then pointed his Sonic Screwdriver at the air & buzzed it, sending out a signal. The Saiyans all looked at The Doctor, confused. They then all prepared themselves for the final blow but The Doctor somehow stopped them with the Screwdriver.
Trunks: Wait, what are you doing?
The Doctor: Oooh. Trunks Briefs, thinking I'm outnumbered. Well, yes right now I am but (clicks his fingers) no. Look at that beautiful sky & tell me, what do you see?
Trunks then looks up to see some moving shapes.
Trunks: The stars are movi- wait, these can't be stars?
The Doctor: Correct, they're not! You see, you haven't even though for a millisecond about who I am. I cannot be erased! I will always be here to stop opposing forces & save all who need it because I have lived for hundreds, no, thousands of years! I am inevitable, no, wait, I am... The Doctor!
Before Trunks' very eyes, a swarm of TARDIS' started appearing out of the sky, surrounding the Saiyans.
1st Doctor: Calling all my future incarnations, we must make contact!
The Saiyans then all flew up to the TARDIS' & started to attack them. At the same time, The Doctors are dodging the attack & using what they've got. It was colossal!
Vegeta: Galick gun!
5th Doctor: Soon be there!
3rd Doctor: Good luck.
4th Doctor: Locking on to coordinates.
8th Doctor: This is were the fun begins!
Broly: I'LL KILL YOU ALL!!!!
Down below, The Doctor & Trunks were watching everything that was going on. Doctors & Saiyans were both getting erased. The Doctor then realised something.
The Doctor: Wait, this isn't right. Oh no! The timelines! Also Trunks, can you just leave me alone during this? It could affect your timelines.
The Gallifreyan then rushed all the way back to his TARDIS to set things right. But Trunks wasn't having it.
Trunks: Oh no you don't!
He then boosted himself to the TARDIS & started his mad search, slashing through everything that gets in his way. The TARDIS interior was like a whole pocket dimension inside the box, with an endless assortment of rooms & other crazy stuff, looking for one man in there is going to be a challenge.
After what felt like hours searching through Libraries, Swimming Pools, Bedrooms & so much more, the time patroller heard an engine sound from behind him. He prepared his sword.
The Doctor: I would move out of the way if I were you!
The Doctor then raced towards Trunks in Bessie, his yellow, vintage car, carrying his best gear on the back. Trunks was then hit by the car & it launched them ahead. But maybe they were launched too far as they were now stuck in the time vortex.
The Doctor: Ooooh, this is not good for either of us...
Trunks realised that this is now of never so he clenched is fists again, energy sparks were around him again but this time, they were red. After an almighty impact, the time cop emerged, now in his scarlet Super Saiyan God form. He was more than ready to finish things!
He then gave The Doctor a few good slashes which knocked him back a bit & stunned him. He then got out the very thing that would spell doom for the travelling Time Lord, his Key Sword... After activating the awakened form he prepared for an almighty slash.
Trunks: Now! Time to shut you down for good!
The Doctor: We'll see about that...
The Doctor then narrowly dodged the hits, this when he found a De-mat Gun he's not used for centuries, maybe it could help. He managed to pick it up & get it ready, but he had little time as Trunks was about to go in for the finishing blow!
The Doctor aimed carefully & then shot a beam from out of the gun. Trunks himself didn't make any contact with the blast, but the Key Sword did because as soon as the beam touched it, the sword was completely erased!
Trunks: Wha... How?!!?
The Doctor unusually didn't say anything as he then whipped out the unbreakable chains & managed to wrap them around Trunks, who was now struggling heavily to get out.
Trunks: How are you doing all this? Are you mad?!!?
The Doctor: No Trunks. You see, non of this is new to me. I've faced far greater threats than you can imagine, Daleks, Sontarans, Cybermen! They're still in the Nursery compared to me!
He then pulled out his most powerful item, the Moment.
The Doctor: I don't want to do this but you've left me with no choice. Who is more important to the universe! Tell me! I'm just a man who doesn't want to go so, I'm not going!
Then, he did it. He pushed the red button that opened up from the puzzle of the Moment. After that, everything went into a completely white void.
We then cut to a devastated city were we see The Doctor, badly damaged, look mournfully at a pile of ash covered in a layer of broken glass & rubble. The pile of ash was once Trunks Briefs, the Time Cop of the Xenoverse. The Time Lord then slowly walked back into his ship to think about what he could do next. On his way, he quietly spoke to himself.
The Doctor: No more. No more...
Results[]
KO!
Boomstick: Shit! Trunks could've easily destroyed that nerd!
Wiz: Well, no. Trunks definitely had the physical speed & strength advantage but The Doctor had everything else to put down the half-Saiyan hero.
Boomstick: Oh yeah, like what?
Wiz: First off, his technology is way more versatile & dangerous than Trunks'. Such as the Sonic Screwdriver, which can out right turn off technology!
Boomstick: So, bye-bye, time travel arm band!
Wiz: Or the Moment, which can destroy entire galaxies worth of species! Secondly, & most important of all, is his experience.
Boomstick: Ok?
Wiz: The Doctor has lived for thousands of years, sporting any faces. Non of this stuff is entirely new to him as he has seen it all. He has saved many lives & faced many monsters like the Daleks, Weeping Angels, Toymaker & more!
Boomstick: Wiz, all of this sounds cool & all, but what if Trunks trapped The Doctor in the Eternal Time Labyrinth? Wouldn't he be screwed then?
Wiz: Again no. Because at one point, The Doctor actually managed to escape a similar time labyrinth. Sure, it took him centuries but he did it. Trunks was a extremely powerful figure but thanks to arsenal, experience & skills, The Doctor ultimately had the key to his fate.
Boomstick: Looks like Trunks' doctors appointment was unsuccessful. Fatally unsuccessful!
Next time on Death Battle![]
???: Long time no see Sonic, my loathsome copy!
???: ...
The Doctor VS Xeno Trunks is the first episode of Mr. Polarity's new (for real this time) Death Battle script series. It features The Doctor from the Doctor Who series and Trunks Briefs from the Dragon Ball series, specifically the alternate universe version from Heroes and Xenoverse, in a battle of time travelling alien (though half-human on their mother's sides) heroes.
Interlude[]
Wiz: The Doctor, the heroic Time Lord of many faces.
Boomstick: Trunks Briefs, the half-Saiyan time cop of Dragon Ball Xenoverse!
Wiz: Throughout all of fiction, time travel has been commonly used as a means of storytelling. Whether it be to correct one’s mistakes or meddle it for their own desire.
Boomstick: Wiz, I’m pretty sure that today’s combatants would probably side with the former. He’s Wiz and I’m Boomstick!
Wiz: And it’s our job to analyse their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win… a Death Battle!
Doctor... Who?[]
Wiz: Once upon a November lived Ian Chesterton and Barbara Wright. They were just your average Londoners teaching average students in a average school.
Boomstick: Well, except for one.
Wiz: Young Susan was anything but average. It was almost as if she was... an alien.
Boomstick: And so the two teachers decided that the smartest idea was to follow her as she was walking home... it was the sixties, I guess.
Wiz: It was at this very foggy night they encountered her grandfather and his police box hanging around in a junkyard, and found the answer to their problem.
Boomstick: They were aliens! And sike! That "police box" was actually a three in one spaceship, time machine and caravan!
Wiz: And so the four were whisked away into the stars, marking the beginning of what will become over half a century of timey-whimey adventures that would leave generations of children hiding behind the couch!
Boomstick: From fighting off the deadly Daleks and Cybermen to shoving Hitler in a closet, this guy... chick... person has been everywhere!
Wiz: They had a name that he would never tell and an ever-changing jigsaw puzzle of a history. This mysterious being was only known as The Doctor.
Boomstick: Doctor... who?
Wiz: Gotcha!
Boomstick: Doctor Gotcha? (murmurs) Well, it's not like they had a PhD or anything...
Wiz: Actually, they did at one point.
Boomstick: GOD DAMMIT!
Wiz: Some say that they were the reincarnation of a co-founder of their society, others say they were a lone child experimented on for regeneration. But what we do know is that The Doctor is a Time Lord. Born on the planet Gallifrey several thousand years ago, they grew up studying at the Time Lord academy, earning degrees in cosmic science and higher dimensional physics.
Boomstick: These Time Lords may look human but they are anything but!
Wiz: That's right, Boomstick! Not only do they have two hearts, they can also experience time differently. They can see past, present and future all at once, resist temporal phenomena such as time stops or magic and can even tamper with fixed points in time.
Boomstick: Not only that! They have an array of wacky shit like casual levitation, transmigration, and being able to control their respiratory bypass system. They can even breach the boundaries of space and casually break the fourth wall just because!
Wiz: Time Lords are, for a lack of a better term, living deux ex machinas. In fact, Time Lords don’t seem to actually exist as just their three-dimensional bodies. It is claimed that Time Lords’ physical forms are mere fragments of their true “multi-dimensional forms”, with their true bodies existing in meta-space. Such a body existing in meta-space could subsequently influence probability and instances happening in the three-dimensional universe to their physical body’s convenience, seemingly explaining how they can time and time again overcome any and all odds stacked against their favour.
Boomstick: Sounds fun... for about a day or two.
Wiz: You see, the Time Lords have a rule about not messing around with timelines. So they just hang around their planet watching over and dealing with their own politics.
Boomstick: Not the Doc though! They got bored with Gallifrey so they stole a TARDIS and went on wacky space adventures! Don't blame 'em though. Why take part in space bureaucracy when you can become Mr. Peabody on steroids? But now you're probably wondering, who are all these people and why do they share the same name? Well Time Lords have an... interesting way of cheating death.
Wiz: When struck with a fatal blow or if the body simply grows old, The Doctor undergoes the process of regeneration, giving them a new appearance and slight tweaks to the personality. Post regeneration, The Doctor can temporarily knock down a steel door and regrow lost limbs.
Boomstick: Or better yet, how about weaponizing your own regeneration energy! Said energy is shown to be powerful enough to destroy entire battleships!
Wiz: But there is a major weakness. If a Time Lord dies during the regeneration, the process ends permanently.
Boomstick: So far there have been 15 Doctors... or 16... 17? Ah, screw this! There have been many, many Doctors over the years and they've all had their differences. Some are action heroes, some are mysterious, he was a she at one point and sometimes... I don't even know what they were going with!
Wiz: But despite the changes, the experience stays on to the next incarnation, and the next, and so on. Keeping the same love of life, passion for exploration and (sighs) Britishness...
Boomstick: The Doc has had many companions throughout their long, and I mean long ass life, but non have stayed with them for as long as... well, the box.
Boomstick: Shabby old police box on the outside, physics-defying time capsule on the inside! This is the TARDIS!
Wiz: The Time And Relative Dimension In Space is a sentient ship that can take it's user anywhere in time and space. It being "bigger on the inside" is due to the fact that the interior is dimensionally transcendental.
Boomstick: Dimensionally transce-what, now?
Wiz: In basic terms, the TARDIS is its own pocket dimension with infinite space.
Boomstick: Sooo, like Kirby's stomach?
Wiz: Sort of. The TARDIS is strong enough to tow a planet using a tractor beam, durable enough to tank lightning from Zeus, yes, the God Zeus! And even...
Boomstick: Take on antimatter formed as a tornado! How does this thing work?
Wiz: You see, Boomstick, the TARDIS can be powered via many types of engines such as a black hole, temporal radiation, stars, or even life force, like when The Doctor gave ten years of their life to it.
Boomstick: The TARDIS is so powerful that its own destruction threatens all of reality! As in, the TARDIS’ explosion will cause every sun to go supernova at every moment in history, and the whole universe will never have existed! Holy shit this box is unstoppable!
Wiz: Sadly not, Boomstick, as beings like the Quantum Archangel, a being of nigh-infinite power born from the fusion of Anjeliqua Whitefriar with the energies of the Lux Aeterna, can overpower it even with shields.
Boomstick: Always has to be a catch!
Wiz: The TARDIS can also adjust itself to an infinite degree, essentially changing the route at every turn.
Boomstick: So, if the TARDIS doesn't like you, you may get lost inside it... forever. Don't piss off the box.
Wiz: Or the many alien threats that The Doctor has to deal with on a daily basis. Some of the deadliest beings in the universe: Cybermen, Weeping Angels, Yeti, Autons...
Boomstick: And the Zarbi. Giant alien insects at war with the Bee-like Menoptra. D-don't ask, they were experimenting with stories, ok?
Wiz: But The Doctor always comes out on top with a sharp mind and their knack for gadgetry and technology. This is further emphasised with their most famous tool, the Sonic Screwdriver!
We cut to Wiz and Boomstick as the latter is playing around with the Sonic Screwdriver.
Boomstick: (singing the Sonic SatAM theme) Sonic! it's a household tool! Sonic! It can... open doors, I guess?
Wiz: Oh much more than that! This Sci-Fi swiss army plot device can basically do anything by utilising soundwaves to manipulate nearby objects. It can hack into any, and I mean any form of technology, set up detonations, manipulate energy, create shields, disrupt molecules, the likes. Making it the perfect tool for a pacifist.
Boomstick: Though if you're made of wood, or turkey, you're safe. And look how cool you look holding it! Yaa!
As Boomstick starts waving around the Screwdriver, things start going haywire and falling off around the two hosts, causing Wiz to panic.
Wiz: Boomstick! Wait, no! Stop!
Boomstick: I don't even know how this thing works!
The two hosts continue to panic as the lab rapidly falls apart on them until:
We cut back to the analysis.
Wiz: Uhhhh... A-anyway, The Doctor isn't one to go out all guns blazing. There's psychic paper, a stasis prison cell, an invisibility watch and a personal reality warping device just to name a few.
Boomstick: Don't forget about this freakin' sweet roadster they got while on Earth!
Wiz: Bessie was just you average fancy car but The Doctor has since modified it with several features such as a force field that pins anyone making contact, or a hyper speed-enabling turbo mechanism.
Boomstick: Or how about a stabiliser that lets it resist a tornado with minimal damage! But despite all of this, The Doc does occasionally use a weapon or two when needed. Like this pile of Hobby Lobby pipes.
Wiz: The Dematerialisation Gun is an ancient and powerful Gallifreyan weapon that, when it's trigger is pulled, can erase it's targets from time itself.
Boomstick: Yeah, as in, it causes you to never exist in the first place!
Wiz: Even the Time Lord were afraid of it's capabilities! Thus only using it as a final resort.
Boomstick: And we haven't even gotten to the other Time Lord reality-altering box. But in the wise words of the good Doctor "We'll explain later".
Wiz: "Wise" is a bit of an understatement when it comes to The Doctor. In fact, they're so smart that his brain once powered a 1000 year old super-computer.
Boomstick: Yeah, The Doc may not rush to violence but they were dedicated enough to continuously break down this 20ft thick Azbantium wall said to be 400 times harder than the most intricate diamond! Not to mention the fact that they're fast enough to dodge this professionally trained super soldier.
Wiz: Speaking of speed, The Doctor had to put that and their intelligence to the test when they performed several thousand calculations in their head while half a dozen disintegration rays were coming after them. All this was done in a total of 4 nanoseconds! They also managed to get themselves into this solar flare. The most energetic of the observed solar flares is called the Carrington event which occurred on September 1, 1859. It had an estimated energy around 1032 ergs. This is equal to 10^25 Joules or 2.39 Petatons of TNT.
Boomstick: The Doctor has even encountered Death's Head, the Marvel character comparable to The Thing who one-shot a living black hole with one punch.
Wiz: Not only that, but they became a transcendent time god after taking a dip in the time vortex. While in this state, they were powerful enough to instantly disintegrate the Cybermen from existence.
Boomstick: But then they gave up these awesome god powers in order to save their companion. Nice of you to save her, but why give these powers up?
Wiz: That's the thing about The Doctor, it's the little things they appreciate. They're not the kind to relish in god-like power because that would probably bore them. They would rather go out inspiring the works of H. G. Wells or light up the Olympic flame.
Boomstick: Fuck that! This is Death Battle!
Wiz: (sighs) The Doctor has outwitted various cosmic entities beyond their league such as the Celestial Toymaker, the Great Intelligence, various members of their own kind and even the original Satan.
Boomstick: Who isn't even the deadliest being in the universe, that would go to the Daleks. Ok yes, they do look like trash cans trundling around an often flimsy set, but they are anything but a joke as they can and will exterminate anything isn't like them, even all of space and time! Like when they battled the Time Lords to extinction!
Wiz: This was a war that showed a darker side to The Doctor, one always there but hidden beneath their universal joy. Thrust in a conflict with seemingly no end, the name of The Doctor was abandoned and in it's place was a soldier. A warrior. A killer.
Boomstick: But there was an end as in a single moment, The Warrior pressed the big, red button and finished it all, including Gallifrey with all of the Time Lords and Daleks! You can say that this caused a little shift in The Doctor's life.
Wiz: As dodgy as the Time Lords can get, The Doctor still valued life and cared for it above anything else so killing their own people was the worst possible outcome. Isolation threatened The Doctor to become the very thing they despised, the vengeful god who controls the laws of time. The Time Lord Victorious. And in an alternate universe, he became just that.
Boomstick: And if you push them over the edge, you'll never know how far they'll go! You may not be dead, but you would fuckin' wish you were! This was the fury of a Time Lord. A lone Time Lord.
Wiz: But fortunately, Gallifrey wasn't destroyed! As The Doctor, all of them, rewrote the outcome of the Time War by preserving Gallifrey in a pocket dimension. Time just didn't catch up to them until this moment.
Boomstick: Wibbly-wobbly-timey-whimey... bullshit. Point is if you can turn your biggest L into a dub, that's how you know you're pretty fantastic!
Wiz: This is no ordinary being, they are both a saviour and a warrior! A hero and a criminal! They have lived through wars and genocides but still keep their optimistic look on the universe! Without risk, without reward, you'll never know when they'll show up to save the day.
Boomstick: They are all the goddamn Doctor!
Slade: Hang on a minute. Who put you in charge and who the hell are you anyway?
The Doctor: in that case, allons-y! (watch from 1:11 to 1:44)
Trunks: Dragon Ball's badass made even MORE badass![]
Wiz: Trunks Briefs was born in a tragic time. Son Goku, the Z-Fighters and most of Earth’s population were dead, murdered by a deadly android duo. The only warriors left were the young child of Vegeta and Gohan, Goku’s son.
Boomstick: …And you probably all know the story by now. Mama Bulma built a time machine, Trunks did some badass shit, defeated those pesky androids and returned home…
Wiz: …And that's where the canon story ends!
Boomstick: I was getting to that! Anyway, he returned home only to suddenly get arrested by this midget fairy chick!
Wiz: This “midget fairy chick” as you put it Boomstick, is Chronoa, the supreme kai of time who watches over the Dragon Ball universe. She very well could’ve arrested Trunks due to his illegal use of unsanctioned time travel, but sensing his good intentions, Trunks was instead recruited into the Time Patrol, an organization founded to defend as many timelines as possible from time-altering threats such as the Dark Empire.
Boomstick: Welcome to Dragon Ball Heroes! An alternate universe... no, Xenoverse where everything in the Dragon Ball universe has its own canon timeline. Basically the ultimate DB fanfiction Kaio-ken x100 but official! It ROCKS!
Wiz: Despite this not being on his to-do list, Trunks was perfect for the role! Even without the soft compositing, it is heavily implied that this version of Trunks has lived all the way through some variation of the Goku Black Saga, meaning that he still possesses everything that the original Trunks has.
Boomstick: Including all the benefits of being half alien monkey man.
Wiz: As Planet Vegeta has, well, had a gravity around 100x greater then on Earth, it's natural that Trunks' strength, stamina, speed, and overall potential far surpasses that of the average human.
Boomstick: Yeah, these Saiyan dudes can shake a whole freakin' planet by just throwing hands! Or just point-and-click 'em out of existence! Trunkie can even go out for long periods without oxygen.
Wiz: A notable trait of Saiyan lineage however is his mid-fight progression. As in, throughout battle, Trunks will gradually rise in strength due to his Saiyan blood. In addition to this, if he were to ever be severely wounded and then recover, Trunks will receive a large stat increase in the form of a Zenkai boost.
Boomstick: Also like other Saiyans, Trunks has the ability to harness his Ki. I'm not gonna bore you with information like Wizard over here, but Ki is basically the force for monkey people.
Wiz: Ki is the life essence of the Dragon Ball universe, and by using special martial arts, it can be weaponised into Ki blasts. An example of this is the famous Kamehameha.
Boomstick: Trunks has access to plenty of devastating Ki blasts from other fighters like big-ass laser, big-ass laser with two hands, more two handed big-ass lasers, explosions and so on.
Wiz: But not all of them are taken from his peers, such as the Burning Attack.
Boomstick: My man looks like he's having a goddamn seizure!
Wiz: This move comes in two variations. The Spread Shot version is the same but it fires four beams instead of just the one and the Guided version locks on to the enemy before exploding, causing greater damage. Trunks can also sense the Ki of others, allowing him to constantly track them mid-battle. Despite this, it's important to know that Ki on it's own is not limitless. Many characters, Trunks included, can run out of Ki due to it being tied to their stamina.
Boomstick: Another thing that sets him apart from other Saiyans is his super awesome magic sword known as... his sword!
Wiz: Also known as the Brave Sword, this blade was gifted to Trunks by the legendary hero, Tapion.
Boomstick: Or... not. Weird, isn't it?
Wiz: Origins aside, this sword is a useful primary weapon as it can slice right through deadly foes and cut them up into several tiny pieces.
Boomstick: And if that's not enough, these Time Patrol folks have given Trunks plenty of neat gizmos to help him out such as a Time Travel armband, which he and his fellow time cops can use to go time warping without causing any alterations or distortions to the timeline. Or how about these time crystals that lets him communicate directly to Chronoa while on missions.
Wiz: Trunks in this timeline also has access to God Ki, a variation of Ki that normally applies only to, well... gods. This allows him to heal minor wounds, sense other godly beings who cannot be sensed by normal people, and even tear open holes in space time, creating pocket dimensions.
Boomstick: Trunks has sparred with many god-like beings in the Dragon Ball multiverse, but not without the help of various more powerful forms.
Boomstick: Let's start with the original. Everybody knows what a Super Saiyan is, even grandma! Gold hair, badass aura and all.
Wiz: The classic Super Saiyan form increases all of Trunks' stats 50 times over, greatly increasing his combat skills.
Boomstick: That's not all as he can go further beyond with a two! And a three! and even a spice of rage!!!
Wiz: Obtained through the sheer rage of the mind thanks to Goku Black and Zamasu, Super Saiyan Rage, you guessed it, massively boosts Trunks’ stats compared to his previous ones.
Boomstick: But when Black and Zamasu merged into this, Trunkie then decided "Hey, I'm gonna become a motherfuckin' Spirit Bomb!"
Wiz: Not exactly Boomstick, he absorbed the positive energy like a spirit bomb but it was absorbed into him, creating an upgraded form known as the Super Saiyan Spirit Bomb.
Boomstick: He even upgraded his sword to match Zamasu, basically giving him half of the Mecha Frieza treatment.
Wiz: While the increase in power doesn't have a confirmed number, it makes him capable of keeping up with Super Saiyan Blue level characters.
Boomstick: But guess what? This isn't even his final form! Because in this universe, Trunkie has a big new fancy form. The all-powerful crimson visage of the Super Saiyan God!
Wiz: Unlocked after five pure-hearted Saiyans lent Trunks their power, this form has Trunks powered by ridiculously potent God Ki. But like the Super Saiyan Rage, the specific increase in power isn't set in stone but we do know that the boost it gives is massively above the rest.
Boomstick: Perfect for fighting off actual demons! Such as the time these fellas revived Mechikabura, the ruler of the Demon Realm, causing all sorts of distortions and shit all over the Xenoverse.
Wiz: Ok, so, all of the major timelines are contained in the Scrolls of Eternity. Anything that goes out of hand results in a new scroll poofing into existence. The problem is that there's only so many scrolls. Reaching the limit can cause, I dunno, cosmic Armageddon! The previously mentioned time travel armbands are there so that Trunks and his fellow patrollers cannot let this happen.
Boomstick: But still, there are times were this shit still happens. Like when Sealas, the first Time Patroller, tried to rewrite DB Heroes! The world and the game! Did I mention the fact that this universe is an arcade game of its own... universe? My head hurts!
We cut to Wiz and Boomstick in the Death Battle lab.
Wiz: Well, kinda. Trunks is an avid fan of the Dragon Ball Heroes arcade game, it essentially serves as another method of time travel, allowing future warriors to visit iconic moments from the past, complete with an assortment of collectible cards that can freely manipulate the fabric of space-time in order to summon other characters from the franchise’s history to assist him in battle. Trunks also funded the Hero Switch, which means he can use his cards on the go.
Boomstick: Trunks himself is a usable character in many of these cards. As these cards seem to be based directly on the characters they represent, it’s reasonable to say that anything these cards have been shown doing, the actual Trunks could do as well. Which reminds me… check this out, Wiz!
Boomstick pulls out his own custom Hero Switch.
Wiz: Boomstick… H- How did you make this?!!?
Boomstick: Just out of some scraps I found in your lab. Behold! My true power!
He then throws out a card he also made and uses his Hero Switch to summon a giant, sentient Beer can.
Beerman: Never fear because the incredibly drunk out of his f(belch)ing mind Beerman is h(burp) here!
Beerman crashes into the floor. Wiz does not know how to feel so he just stares at the floor and then at Boomstick.
Wiz: Oh. My. God... But sadly it was still not enough to defeat Mechikabura.
Boomstick: Yeah, no shit! This guy is able to absorb a black hole that was 10 million years old and was sucking in space-time itself. Even Super Saiyan 4 Vegito had trouble fighting him! But then, when all seemed lost, Trunks pulled out the ultimate trump card, the deus ex machina to end all deus ex machinas straight outta Kingdom Hearts!
Wiz: This is the Key Sword, an ancient weapon created to combat dark beings. Made up of Time Power, it is by far the most powerful weapon Trunks has access to as it is able to cut through Demon Gods like butter.
Boomstick: And that's just in its sealed state! This thing can be awoken giving it an even more badass look!
Wiz: The Key Sword can drain energy, completely shut down the opponents power and trap them in the...
Boomstick: ETERNAL TIME LABYRINTH!!!!! God, I love saying that!
Wiz: The Eternal Time Labyrinth traps its targets in the Crack of Time, a bubble of reality outside all timelines with windows into others. The key sword is powerful enough to destroy Mechikabura with a single strike!
Boomstick: Fun fact: this puts Trunkie above the powers of out canon Goku! You know, the one that could destroy the universe up to 13 times over when he first channelled Super Saiyan God!
Wiz: The same Son Goku who's fast enough to from Grand Kai's planet to Hell in less than a minute. Looking at the canon visual model, this would require speeds of about 29 quintillion times faster than light.
Boomstick: And that was before Whiskey training!
Wiz: But Trunks isn't usually alone as many of his Time Patrol teammates are just as impressive. One such example is... well, you. Yes, you. In the Xenoverse games, you battle Demigra and Chamel. The former was in control of all time and space and the latter threatened the whole multiverse.
Boomstick: So, congrats! You can probably beat Goku! Maybe you can even throw that IRL kamehameha you've always wanted to throw.
Wiz: So, if you're planning on messing with time, don't count on succeeding....
Boomstick: Because Trunks and his team of time cops will always be there to protect the Dragon Ball timelines!... Ok, I know this is nothing to do with Heroes but there's this one moment in GT where Trunks gets into a car crash. Like, what the fuck?
Prelude[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set and we've run the data through all possibilities.
Boomstick: It's time for a wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey Death Battle!!!!
Death Battle[]
Within the skies of the gleaming metropolis that is West City, a blue, mid-20th century police box can be seen flying through its buildings. But it wasn’t your ordinary police box from that time. It was a type-40 TARDIS and inside it was the ancient Time Lord known only as The Doctor, clicking on the various complicated controls of the central six-sided console inside the box. He then looked into the scanner to check on the problem.
The Doctor: (sighs) I really cannot catch a break...
Outside, the TARDIS was trying to avoid a barrage of Ki blasts coming from an attacker from behind. That attacker was none other than Trunks Briefs, the future warrior, slashing any obstacle with his signature Brave sword. The Doctor then peeked his head outside to talk to the time cop.
The Doctor: Hello there. What have I done this time?
Trunks: Stay back, Time Lord! You're under arrest for unsanctioned time travel!
The Doctor: Oh fantastic… Well, t’was nice chatting to you but I best be off. Cheerio!
And with that, the Time Lord went back inside whilst avoiding another set of Ki blasts. He pressed on a few more buttons until he pulled the lever, and then the long rotors began to push up and down. Outside, Trunks was trying to catch up with the ship when suddenly, it began to dematerialise. The son of Vegeta thought that this was his chance, so he rushed into the blue box, but it was too late as the TARDIS completely disappeared before his very eyes! Trunks then looked at his time travel armband and began pressing a few buttons on it.
Trunks: (to himself) The Supreme Kai of Time definitely mentioned a disappearing blue box. So this is how he wants to do it, huh?
After pressing a few buttons, a yellow flash appeared from behind him and consumed him. The chase is on!
We cut to a dead and empty spaceship with no noise apart from the occasional sparkling of hanging wires, at least until the familiar groaning sounds started fading in, getting louder and louder until the TARDIS finally materializes near one of the doors. The Doctor then steps out to check around his current location. His exploration was mainly walking around various black and seemingly endless corridors using his trusty Sonic Screwdriver to detect any sign of life.
The Doctor: (to himself) Mmmm, curiouser and curiouser…
But it didn't take long for the Time Lord to notice something going on as a flash of yellow light suddenly appeared before The Doctor's eyes! Then out came Trunks, who instantly flew towards his opponent and landed a punch that launched The Doctor to a nearby wall. The Time Lord then stood up from the damage and prepared himself.
The Doctor: Alright, fine. But I must warn you that this duel isn’t going to be an easy one, for I am The Doctor, and this… (pulls out spoon) …is my spoon!
Trunks: (as he pulls out his sword) Heh, bold move there.
And with that, both combatants traded many blows with their mighty weapons. The half-Saiyan was quick but the Time Lord made sure to stay on the defensive nonetheless fending off Trunks’ attacks. But Trunks then zoomed behind The Doctor and kicked the back of his head (Sonic 06 Shadow style) before building up Ki in his hands.
Trunks: Masenko-Ha!
He then shot an energy blast at The Doctor, knocking him down again… but not for very long as he got right back up to block Trunks' next attack with his spoon, only for it to be sliced clean in half. But suddenly, the two travellers noticed that the remaining lights were flickering intensely before suddenly shutting off, leaving them in darkness. This lasted until the lights instantly turned back on, but this time, they’re not alone. They were surrounded! Surrounded by metal giants all too familiar with The Doctor.
The Doctor: Ah. I should've known.
Trunks: You know these guys?
The Doctor: Cybermen!
Trunks: They don’t look like Saibamen.
The Doctor: Ok, when I say run…
But before The Doctor could finish, Trunks instantly rushed into battle, fighting off each Cyberman with a barrage of sword slashes and Ki attacks. The Doctor just stared before making his decision.
The Doctor: (sighs) Well at least he’s entertained.
Results[]
Next Time![]
Track[]
Title[]
The title is simply a combination of two names relating to each of the combatants (The Doctor being referred to as "The Oncoming Storm" and Trunks' Super Saiyan Rage form respectively).
Cover art[]
The cover art depicts a shard from the Crack of Time (a major location within the fight) with the TARDIS contained inside of it. Trunks' Keysword is seen plunging into the bottom left of the shard while The 9th/10th Doctor's Sonic Screwdriver emerges from the top right.
Metal Sonic vs Dark Samus (Sonic the Hedgehog vs Metroid)