| There’s a Starman, waiting in the sky… | |
|---|---|
| Season | 2 |
| Season Episode | 10 (finale) |
| Air date | Some day… |
| Written by | Cheesypickles564 |
| Episode guide | |
| Previous Allied Mastercomputer vs Anthony Fremont |
Next Bowser vs Satan |
Note: Both characters will be composited with every form of media they’ve appeared in
Superman vs Optimus is a What-If? Death Battle written by Cheesypickles564, featuring Superman from DC Comics against Optimus Prime from the Transformers media series.
Description[]
DC Comics vs Transformers. These two are more than Hollywood heroes. They don’t yell and act tough; they are gentle. They are inspirations to many, with their iconic red, white and blue being symbols of hope. Will Optimus Prime be the last one standing, or will the Last Son of Krypton live another day?
Interlude[]
Puppy: Superman, the last son of Krypton and the man of steel.
Kitty: And Optimus Prime, the Cybertronian librarian-turned motivational hero!
Puppy: When it comes to being a superhero, these two are the gold standard. These two have unwavering dreams of peace. They represent the hope of humanity…not because they themselves are human, but because they have hope in us.
Kitty: But y’know what…peace is practically assured for their worlds, because these two can really kick some ass! He’s Puppy and I’m Kitty!
Puppy: And it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.
“Superman is Up, Up and Away in Death Battle!”[]
(Cue: Superman Theme - John Williams)
Puppy: It’s a beautiful night in Smallville, Kansas. Underneath the stars drives Martha and Jon Kent, two organic farmers who had no forewarning for their impending responsibility.
Kitty: When BOOM! Here comes a meteor shower! A beautiful sight, sure, but Martha and Jon ignored the beauty of it when a meteor of some sort came right towards them, crashing and blowin’ a crater into the ground.
Puppy: The two farmers went to investigate, and lying in the crater was a healthy, giggling and naked baby boy.
Kitty: …heh, bet that last one got us all when we were kids.
Puppy: The couple took the boy in as their own son, naming him Clark and teaching him good values. There was something different about this child, though.
Kitty: The kid was superhuman! He was faster than a bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound! I’m sure you know where we’re going with this…it’s a bird…it’s a plane…no, it’s— Puppy: Superman! Man of tomorrow, man of steel, champion of the oppressed…it’s no mystery that Superman goes by many names, but what truly is a mystery for his world is Supe’s origin.
Kitty: Clark was actually from the far-off planet of Krypton, and his name wasn’t actually Clark either. He was Kal-El, son of Jor-El. Does that make me…Kitty-El…?
Puppy: Krypton was dying as the result of growing radiation. To save their son, Jor-El and his wife Lara sent Kal-El to Earth in a rocket, with high hopes that he’d survive.
Kitty: And oh, he did more than that. Apart from stayin’ under the radar with his alter-ego Clark Kent, getting a job at Metropolis’ head newspaper and absolutely scoring his coworker Lois Lane, Supes actually found out ways to utilize his powers into becoming a superhero for Metropolis, and later the whole world.
Puppy: He was pretty much the first superhero to “take flight,” both figuratively and literally, and many have followed.
Kitty: By literally, my friend here means that Superman can FLY…but you probably already knew that. By outstretchin’ his arms and belting out an “up, up and away!” he can take off.
Puppy: But to be able to show up to help at a moment’s notice, Clark also has super-hearing that extends to the point where he can hear his friend Jimmy’s watch from the star Vega, which is about 147 trillion miles away from Earth. That’s not it, though, all of his senses are heightened, as proven when he could smell freshly-baked brownies…from outer space.
Kitty: That’s not that abnormal…I have an internal clock for brownies…heh! Clark can also use his X-Ray vision to see through anything except for lead, which must have been a real hassle in the locker rooms…but we should also mention that he’s a master of disguise! …actually, how the hell haven’t the folks at the Daily Planet figured out Clark is Superman?
Puppy: It’s quite flawless, really. Superman stands upright and proud, while Clark is a slouching, soft-spoken nerd with box glasses. It’s something called observer’s bias—
Kitty: Yeah, yeah, but how do they not notice the rippling muscles Supes has? ‘Course those muscles are actually put to good work over the course of his superhero gig, because while words can help win battles, super strength is absolutely the way to go.
Puppy: Superman was gifted with incredible strength, yes, and it’s impressive to the point where he’s punched a man so hard that every version of himself in the timeline could feel it.
Kitty: That’s metal as hell! My personal favorite is when he punched out Maaldor the Darklord, who could turn himself into an entire universe.
Puppy: Kal-El’s still capable of more, though. He has heat vision that’s as hot as 5000 degrees celsius and possibly as hot as the sun at his peak.
Kitty: And if he goes a bit overboard with that, no worries! He can just cool you down with his ice breath, which can reach temperatures as cold as absolute zero.
Puppy: And of course, Superman does have a really useful power-up in the form of a dip in the sun.
Kitty: Ya see, Kryptonians are powered by stars. The energy they get is based on what kinda Star they’re around…as an example, a red sun makes a Kryptonian lose all of their powers as long as they’re around it, while a blue sun amplifies their power by tenfold! Given that there’s a bunch of solar energy building up inside of Supes at all times, he can expel it all in a solar flare as well.
Puppy: It’s all quite impressive, huh?
Kitty: If it hasn’t gotten confusing enough, though, here’s where things get strange. For this episode, we’re going to be looking at a “composited” Superman—a Superman where every piece of media he’s been in is counted.
Puppy: First we’re getting into Pre-Crisis Superman, from the time when logic didn’t really matter, just putting out entertaining comics did!
Kitty: This version of the big blue Boy Scout is capable of incredibly bizarre feats like knocking out a livin’ universe with ease or sneezing an entire universe away. Y’know, this stuff gets weirder as we go on.
Puppy: And this is just the beginning. This version of Superman’s outmuscled chains of pure kryptonite, which is absolutely defying his species’ natural weakness to kryptonite.
Kitty: That’s nothin’! He’s towed planets around, snapped a blade so hard that it was left to vibrate for centuries, threw Jimmy Olsen into the future and crushed coal into diamonds…and turned them back into coal by jerkin’ his hands the other way. That’s the Man of Steel for ya!
Puppy: He’s also impressively quick, whether it be on his feet or in the air. He’s outpaced a lightning bolt, kept up with the Flash and even flown around the world counterclockwise fast enough to send himself back in time.
Kitty: I’m not the math guy, but even I can tell that this feat would require him to move faster than the speed of light…not like I’m smart or anything, it’s just that Superman said it himself.
Puppy: The Pre-Crisis run also gives Superman an array of powers, which aren’t exactly useful, but…
Kitty: I swore there were more powers we had to cover…huh?
Puppy: Yes, but the key word is “useful.” We’re getting into the weird powers now.
Kitty: My favorite! Y’know, these powers are kinda like when you’re at a Chinese restaurant and ya look at the kids menu…they’re just so fucking out of place.
Puppy: Simply put, Superman’s greatest power is whatever the writers need at the time. Years and years of continuing comic runs really does something to a guy.
Kitty: He has a lot of real humdingers under his belt, like how he could quite literally shapeshift at one point. He also had Super-Hypnosis, Super-Landscaping, Super-Friction, Super-Knitting, Super-Kiss, Super-Weaving, Super-Ventriloquism and of course, Super-Math! And there’s a lot more.
Puppy: He can clone himself, mind-control others, shoot rainbows out of his hands and create multiple mini-Supermen, creating this confusion scale where they begin to create their own smaller Supermen and it keeps going until we get molecular Superman, and…
Kitty: Calm down.
Popup: While most of these “odder” powers aren’t necessarily going to be included in the battle, they’re absolutely worth bringing up.
Kitty: ‘Cause I’m supposed to be the one geeking over this weird shit! Through his “Super Caller-ID,” Clark always knows who’s callin’ him, no matter how far away he is from a phone!
Puppy: That’s it. We’ve got all of them, right…?
Kitty: We forgot the Super-Dancing—
Puppy: Yes. We’ve gotten them all down. While most of this is on the goofier side, Superman is, at his core, an ideal. A refugee hero who lost his home and decided that it was his destiny to protect a new one.
Kitty: Yeah, really tearjerkin’ stuff, isn’t it? Well, in order to actually explore the more influential parts of Clark’s character, DC retconned a lot of stuff after an amazing comic run called the “Crisis on Infinite Earths”, which leads us into what is called Post-Crisis. Creative, isn’t it?
Puppy: While this retcon relies a lot more on logic than gags, it doesn’t mean Clark isn’t insanely powerful still.
Kitty: Apart from even more willpower, Superman also gained more powers through this retcon. Through the Torquasm Rao, an ancient Kryptonian martial art, Supes can essentially just masterfully fight without the need to think, and with it’s sister-art, the Torquasm Vo, Clark can drag his opponent into another mental plane where they can have coffee, talk or beat the ever-living shit out of each other!
Puppy: These martial arts also allow Superman to use telekinesis, create forcefields and barriers, and literally dig into someone’s brain like a parasite.
Kitty: Also by vibratin’ really fast, Superman can turn invisible and intangible…heh, explains why my hand went straight through my car motor when I tried to Hotwire it…if you really piss him off, which is hard to do, you’ll be subject to some of his more brutal abilities, too.
Puppy: This version of Superman has been shown to be able to scream at the exact frequency needed to mess with the quantum strings that make up a person, meaning that he’d theoretically be able to completely atomize someone with a scream.
Kitty: Harsh. Y’know, I liked him more when he was just throwin’ his super plastic wrap at crooks. Superman was already tough, but he became even tougher through the retcon…apart from being completely bulletproof, Clark can survive a full-on blast from a disintegration ray, release a supernova made of anti-sunlight that destroyed half of the galaxy and hold back a black hole with a similar effect to that!
Puppy: Not exactly. Superman was once capable of holding back the full force of a black hole that could destroy an entire solar system, with his own two hands.
Kitty: He’s taken beatings from Doomsday, tagged the immeasurably quick Flash again and survived two subsequent big bangs completely unscathed! At this point, the question is what Supes can’t do.
Puppy: Well neither the world or his writers can get enough of Superman, which leads us to what’s more than multiple comic runs…alternate universes.
Kitty: First up on our shopping list is Red Son Superman! Rather than being dropped from space into Kansas and raised by loving parents, this version of Kal-El was tossed back in time and into Soviet Russia.
Puppy: This Superman was raised by the Russian government and turned into the perfect superpowered soldier who would fight the “never-ending battle for Stalin, socialism and the international expansion of the Warsaw Pact.”
Kitty: Meh, doesn’t really roll off the tongue as well as “truth, justice and the American way”…after Stalin was murdered by American hero Lex Luthor, Superman was given full control of Russia, and he’d transform it into his own utopia, helping humanity achieve what he believed they could. Doesn’t exactly sound like somethin’ a Soviet would do…
Puppy: While Red Son Superman’s powerset isn’t exactly different from mainstream Superman’s, he’s still capable of pulling off some impressive stuff.
Kitty: He’s managed to harm another version of himself, which creates a confusing back-and-forth where his strength scales to his durability and vise versa and…he could also break through Green Lantern constructs, which are made of a buncha micron-thin layers. Next!
Puppy: In the All-Star Superman universe, Kal-El’s cells are overloaded with yellow solar radiation, which do increase his powers but will eventually kill him. Given his impact on his world, this Superman decides to spend his last days preparing Earth for his passing.
Kitty: Lex Luthor’ up to his antics as always, though, and before he dies, Clark has to go punch him out and make sure he stops what he’s doin’.
Puppy: That’s really watered down.
Kitty: What? I didn’t understand most of it…what I really got was that Superman became the sun at the end.
Puppy: A solar being. Superman sent his consciousness into the sun and became a solar being watching over Earth. This does give him a new ability in the form of being able to resurrect himself if he can build up enough energy from the sun.
Kitty: Same thing! This Superman was capable of building and destroying suns with the Cosmic Anvil and defeating Bar-El and Lilo-El, two Kryptonians that were capable of crackin’ the moon.
Puppy: Among these two unique Supermen are Dinosaur Superman, Cyborg Superman, Blue Superman, Red Superman, Darkseid Superman, a bunch of evil Supermen…
Kitty: Superman-Killer Superman, President Superman, Green Lantern Superman, Nazi Superman, Old Superman, Milkman Superman, Psychic Superman…
Puppy: Immortal Superman, Normal Person Superman, Amish Superman and Centaur Superman…Phew.
Kitty: Of course, we’re saving the two most powerful forms of Superman for last…Superboy Prime and the Thought Robot.
Superboy Prime
Puppy: In Superboy Prime’s world, superheroes only existed as comic books. That is, until—
Kitty: BOOM! A cosmic storm caught this version of Clark and he briefly met with the actual Superman, which had awakened his Kryptonian powers and made him the first superhero in his world.
Puppy: He took the name Superboy and began doing the routine things—saving cats from trees, funding cancer research and many more.
Kitty: But after the good ol’ Crisis, Superboy was driven insane and pushed over his breaking point, making him go absolutely rogue and take the name “Superboy Prime”. Unnecessarily edgy, but I respect it.
Puppy: This psychotic version of big blue is capable of simply warping reality with mere punches, with every blow being capable of altering timelines.
Kitty: And you absolutely won’t like him when he’s angry, because when Superboy Prime is pissed, he gets a huge boost in power. Even without these angry-steroids, he’s been able to defeat 30 trained Green Lanterns effortlessly and shrug off hits from a Flash charged with the full power of the speed force. Y’know, the cosmic force that is the only thing pushing space and time forward.
Puppy: Not only is was this version of Superman capable of tanking a blow from the full force of the Speed Force, but he was also capable of breaking out of this universe-spanning energy moments after being trapped in it.
Kitty: Yeah, evil Superman’s a lot scarier a concept then we give it credit for. The same dude absolutely violated the Anti-Monitor, a dude who could destroy all of reality and one of the “brothers three”, who stand and exist above the DC multiverse…also Superboy Prime broke Hal Jordan’s arm. Ben 10 fans, there’s the karma you wanted!
Puppy: And while giving the “rawest” line in all of comic history, this Superman was capable of ripping straight through the armor of Captain Atom, which contained enough quantum energy to mess with the space-time continuum.
Kitty: He’s not just killing you, he’s killing you to death! Superboy Prime has even went toe-to-toe with his post-crisis self—Y’know, the one who could erase a person by absolutely beltin’ out his vocal cords…that still doesn’t sit right with me.
Puppy: This version of Superman has a different set of weaknesses from the other Supermen. While he’s still weakened by Kryptonite, he’s also a lot more arrogant and psychotic than normal Kal-El. It is worth noting that his “Anti-Monitor Armor” negates his weakness to red sunlight, though.
Kitty: He’s also a pussy in the face of anyone who’s really quick, because he has PTSD from his time stuck in the Speed Force. It was short, but goddamn it sucked for him. Now it’s time for the other incredibly-powerful variant Supes has under his big red belt—the Thought Robot!
Puppy: Also known as “Cosmic Armor Superman”, this version of Kal-El was built by Dax Novu, a monitor. Monitors are a species that, well, monitor every aspect of the multiverse, making sure everything’s in place.
Kitty: Poor old Dax Novu was sent to fix a flaw in the race themselves, but had accidentally acquired a new way of seein’ the multiverse—ya see, Dax saw the stories that built up DC itself, and he was corrupted. It’s like when you get that good fuckin’ bite of a sandwich and it tastes so good that you decide to go ahead and try to gobble up the thing that holds the entire multiverse.
Puppy: …what?
Kitty: ‘Least that’s what the crackhead behind IHOP told me.
Puppy: You need some serious help. In order to combat his future form known as “Mandrakk”, Dax, before he became fully corrupted, created the Thought Robot to stop him from going too far once he lost his mind.
Kitty: And this is where shit gets confusing—the Thought Robot was formed inside the concept of Superman itself, and goin’ against the Thought Robot is the same as goin’ against the very idea of superheroes as well. If you thought everything we’ve already covered is busted, than you’ve seen nuthin’ yet!
Puppy: While the Thought Robot possesses all of Superman’s powers on a much, much grander scale, it also bears more abilities like the ability to adapt to anything thrown at it.
Kitty: That’s not it, though, it can also take a sneak-peek into the future to see what threats’ll be comin’ at it later, and adapt to it then. It’s aware of the fourth wall and can even reach out to the reader!
Puppy: The Thought Robot can change the plot itself and can resist the same thing being used on it, as shown by the history of the DC multiverse commanding that the Thought Robot lose to Mandrakk—
Kitty: And the damn thing just “middle-fingered” Mandrakk and beat the shit out of him! It even exists above the infinitesimal plane of existence called “Comic Book Limbo” which exists above the “Sphere of the Gods” which exists above all gods and extra dimensional beings, makin’ a weird nesting doll effect that’s really confusing on paper.
Puppy: Being on the same level as Mandrakk is a feat in and of itself as well. Dax Novu was capable of wiping out other Monitors with ease and even harming the Thought Robot, which means that yet again, Kal-El’s strength scales to his durability and whatnot.
Kitty: It gets really confusin’ sometimes, huh? After it’s grand battle against Mandrakk with Supes and his evil counterpart Ultraman piloting it, the Thought Robot was capable of silencing Mandrakk’s threat but was damaged beyond repair, no longer functionin’ how it was supposed to. Heavy stuff, huh? Well that’s why we’ve got cartoons, too!
Puppy: In the much goofier and lighthearted “Super-Friends” cartoon, Clark still retains all of his original powers, alongside the ability to time travel and breathe underwater.
Kitty: This goofy big blue is capable of flying THROUGH time, closing the distance between the Earth and the sun in mere seconds, and even throwing the moon! This reminds me of Clark’s goofier stuff.
Puppy: There’s also “Justice League” and “Justice League Unlimited”, two shows that focus on Superman’s extended team and their problems with both their own lives and their lives as heroes, with the government consistently challenging them.
Kitty: Yeah, that’s why you always get the bleach and ammonia ready whenever the IRS sends someone new…this Supes doesn’t gain any new abilities, but he has his own impressive showing of feats.
Puppy: This Kal-El could run on water, tank an explosion at a younger age, redirect a meteor and in a scene that completely shocked anyone who watched the show, he LOBOTOMIZED Doomsday, a creature known for being especially tough.
Kitty: Lobotomy…? That’s an easier way to keep the IRS away than garage-mustard-gas…there’s also “My Adventures With Superman”, a show featuring a rookie Clark tryin’ to make his way in Metropolis. Even though he’s inexperienced, he’s still pretty damn tough.
Puppy: This Clark could tank blasts from a cold gun that could freeze metals, lasers that could melt steel, push a large ship away from the earth, destroy military robots and fight the Parasite, who could easily destroy large military robots. Kitty: And then there’s also movies—starting with the Superman a few generations grew up with, the one from Richard Donner’s Superman! While it does look goofier than what we in Superman today, this was the shit back then.
Puppy: This Superman also has multiple bizarre abilities, much like the Pre-Crisis version of Kal-El. He can throw a plastic version of his “S” logo to ensnare opponents, create holograms of himself and repair the Great Wall of China just by looking at it!
Kitty: Looks can kill, but they can also build up, huh? He also has my favorite, the Memory-Wiping-Kiss! Whether he’s making out with someone or just givin’ them a quick peck, he can erase whatever memories he chooses.
Puppy: He’s kicked away missiles, thrown baseballs into space, outsmarted super genius Lex Luthor, lifted yachts, planes, trains and cars, and even thrown an entire island of kryptonite into space. Y’know, the stuff that makes him weak by touching it.
Kitty: He can circle the globe in seconds, catch bullets and survive bullets too, outfly explosions and even hide, change into costume and fly back before someone falling from Niagara Falls could hit the ground. That’s it for the funny movies, though…sigh.
Puppy: Eventually, Zack Snyder would gain the rights to make his own batch of Superman movies, which leads us to the infamous “Man of Steel”.
Kitty: This is an edgier take on Superman’s story, where instead of a heroic Boy Scout who’s always there, he’s pretty much emo Jesus.
Puppy: He’s been able to fight the island-devastating Doomsday while weakened by Kryptonite, and keep up with Steppenwolf, who’s not only superior to Doomsday, but was capable of clearing the rest of the Justice League on his own.
Kitty: And when he himself ended up coming to blows with the Justice League, they stood no chance no matter how much Kryptonite they tried. Y’know, this stuff doesn’t even feel like a real weakness anymore—it’s so easy to obtain, and it’s not like it does shit to him at this point!
Puppy: That’s…actually very true! Snyder’s Superman could shake tectonic plates, tow cruise ships, crush diamonds, avoid Darkseid’s “Omega Beams”, which are pure light beams that disintegrate on touch. Ouch.
Kitty: He’s also been able to just bolt from Canada to Africa in seconds, and it’s literally stated that both his travel speed and his reaction speed are the same. Literally!
Popup: This information comes from the movie guidebook.
Kitty: Y’know, I liked goofy Superman more.
Puppy: You’ve made that abundantly clear. Honestly, I like when it shows the more human side of him—how he’s just as prone to emotions like anger and sadness like all of us, yet he still keeps—
Kitty: Do we get to talk about Fortnite now?
Puppy: …I was speaking—
Kitty: Superman’s also had his fair share of crossovers, too. Through the Lego games and Fortnite, he’s capable of more absurd things like breaking things and quickly building them into more useful gadgets, and he’s able to just fullbox his opponent and pump ‘em!
Puppy: Never say that again. Lego Superman is capable of building and destroying building-sized objects, and he’s even outmuscled Braniac’s ship, which was big enough to eclipse entire planets. Kitty: He’s fought He-Man, the Xenomorphs, the Terminator and Muhammad Ali. ‘Course, not all of his crossovers are about punching people, so he’s even teamed up with Top Cat, the Nesquik Bunny, the Brady Bunch and even “I Love Lucy!”
Puppy: Even with this massive list of abilities under his belt, he’s still not faultless, and he’s not perfect. He represents that our saviors aren’t always invincible white knights.
Kitty: Yeah, even though he’s repeatedly gained resistance to it, Superman’s big weakness is green space rock candy called “Kryptonite”. Large amounts can knock him down in seconds, and small amounts can just weaken him.
Puppy: Magic is also not his cup of tea. While he’s nigh-invincible, magic can get past his defenses easily and keep him down. There’s also Red Sunlight, which does the counter effect of normal sunlight and drains his powers.
Kitty: But it’s okay, he doesn’t have to be perfect. Superman isn’t just a character—he is an ideal. He’s the representation of a real hero, someone who will always be there in a time of need. No matter time or place, Superman will always hear your cry for help and be up, up and away to the rescue!
Superman: “Dreams save us. Dreams lift us up and transform us into something better. And on my soul, I swear that until my dream of a world where dignity, honor and justice are the reality we all share, I'll never stop fighting.”
“Optimus Prime Rolls Out in Death Battle!”[]
(Cue: Transformers Movie Theme)
Puppy: Cybertron. A dying planet, broken by civil war. Once a thriving and powerful society, Cybertron was split between two sides, the Decepticons and the Autobots. The Decepticons fought for the unification of Cybertron while the Autobots fought for justice and freedom.
Kitty: While Decepticons does sound like a pretty evil name, they weren’t exactly the “bad” guys—in fact, the whole feud started when a Decepticon named Megatron decided to stand for the working class against Cybertron’s oppressive society.
Puppy: But when the senate tried to assassinate Megatron, he decided that enough was enough and the only path to peace was violent revolution.
Kitty: Megatron…why settle for less when you can have a name like…Gigatron? Teratron? Well, Megs decided to just gather his buddies and begin mowing down everyone who even thought about opposing him, which is why he gunned down a seemingly normal librarian named Orion Pax. Down with the books!
Puppy: While seemingly insignificant at first, the death of Orion would have a great effect on the universe.
Kitty: Heh…guess he was more than meets the eye. Enter Alpha Trion, the “middleman” of the war and one of the oldest Transformers. This geezer decided to rebuild Orion in secret, completely improving him in every way. The result…
Puppy: Optimus Prime, the new leader of the Autobots and one of the most prominent names of the 80s!
Kitty: Even though you could buy him for about six bucks at a pharmacy, Optimus is one in a million—inspirational speeches, multiple transformations and an iconic voice all wrapped into one!
Puppy: Unfortunately Optimus wasn’t able to stop Cybertron’s eventual fall, so he did the one reasonable thing and rocket himself to our Earth so he could prevent the Decepticons from exploiting humanity and conquering them as well.
Kitty: He would fight his war on our world, which does sound like somethin’ a shitty neighbor would do, but he’d actually grow to love humanity, and hold hope in us! He’d also come to blows with Megatron many, many times.
Puppy: But to keep up, Optimus would need a few impressive powers. His most notable is the skill every Transformer bears—the skill to, well, transform. While he’s realistically capable of morphing into whatever he chooses, there are a few forms he favors. Kitty: The one we all remember is his tractor truck form—a Kenworth K-100 to be exact. He can even shoot lasers from the exhaust pipes and has a nifty little trailer on his back…wait, can people go inside that trailer…? Vore…?
Puppy: Ahem, it doesn’t quite work like that. The trailer isn’t part of his actual body, it’s more of an extension of himself. Kitty: Oh…he can also transform into a steam engine, a tank, a hat, a dinosaur, a cell phone, a space ship, a jet and even a shoe!
Puppy: Apart from multiple transformations, Optimus has a few weapons, too. His main form of attack is his Ion Blaster, a massive laser rifle that shoots beams of pure energy.
Kitty: On the topic of “pure energy”, robo-bro can also create constructs entirely out of energy, like axes, swords and maces. He can also go full-on Homelander and inconsiderate you with laser-eyes…though that’s not really included in his moral code.
Puppy: About that moral code, Optimus is a great person—but he has stooped to levels where he’s even used his dead friend’s body as a cannonball.
Kitty: Batter up! Even though he served mainly as a librarian, Optimus is very proficient in both hand-to-hand and tactical work—which really does make sense, because he’s been fighting for over nine million years.
Puppy: It’s impressive to have gone that long without rusting, but it’s easy for someone like Optimus. Cybertronians are made of incredibly durable alloys that work the same as human flesh—they have cellular structure, self-healing and even genetic code.
Kitty: Their weird metal bodies aren’t quite like ours, though. Cybertronians are physically unable to tire and don’t need oxygen to live. Hell, Optimus has even been bisected and has continued to fight! He’s also quite flexible despite his clunky robot body.
Puppy: What’s even more impressive is that Optimus was born as a “one percenter”, a term for the one-in-a-million person who is born with a Spark that basically gives him an unfair stat boost compared to other Cybertronians. The Spark is the soul of a Cybertronian, and even if their body dies, it’ll remain to either fight back or flee.
Kitty: He can also fly on his own, but he’s also got a jet pack just for the style points. I respect that!
Puppy: He’s a skilled sharpshooter, and he has heightened senses—he can even read other people’s thoughts and see into the past.
Kitty: Lame…why would you need to see in the past? Whatcha gonna do, try and relive a sandwich bite? He also has a device called the “Roller”, a little stealthy guy that looks kinda like a baby Optimus! Cute, but you won’t think so when it’s blastin’ you with its mini-turret.
Puppy: But, by far, Optimus’ most powerful weapon is the Matrix of Leadership. It’s a broken piece of Transformers version of God, Primus, and it serves as a conductor of his power.
Kitty: And being powered by Robot Yahweh does wonders for Optimus—with the Matrix, he pretty much has a source of immense power inside of him at all times, and he can pretty much glue himself together from the worst of wounds.
Puppy: The Matrix literally gives life to the Cybertronian race, and it serves as a fail safe, being able to shield Optimus from attacks and help power him in return. It’s a holy object to Cybertronians, and for good reason too.
Kitty: But when push comes to shove, Optimus can also activate it and shoot a giant-ass laser beam from his chest that’s capable of destroying PLANETS at its peak!
Puppy: He’s consistently shown to be on the same level as Megatron, who’s survived an explosion powerful enough to send the entire planet of Cybertron rocketing away.
Kitty: Optimus is capable of his own impressive shit, though, and he’s been able to thrown a 700 thousand ton oil tanker and survive an explosion from a refinery that could be seen in space!
Puppy: He’s thrown hands with Soundwave, who tanked a blow from the Orbital Destruction Cannon, a weapon so powerful that it could shoot the moon away. He’s even shattered the armor of Sixshot, which was made from the matter of a collapsing star!
Kitty: He’s outmuscled the dwarf-star level Rodimus Prime while holding back, and he’s even shot down a space shuttle from Earth. The dude’s faster than Cybertronians who could move from the sun to the Earth in moments, escape the sun’s atmosphere and even kept pace with Astrotrain, a Decepticon who could speed past a fighter jet and close the distance between multiple planets in seconds!
Puppy: His Ion Blaster is also capable of harming Decepticons who have survived the aforementioned Orbital Destruction Cannon, and since he’s being hit with the same force through recoil, he’d realistically scale to the blast from the ODC.
Kitty: ODC? That’s weird, Y’know, hearing you try to have fun with acronyms…Optimus is already crazy broken here, but this is just the cartoons—it’s time for comics!
Puppy: In 2005, IDW Comics gained the publishing rights to Transformers comics, and this time, it’s a lot crazier.
Kitty: Alongside introducing new characters like robo-Judas, IDW’s run gave Optimus a bunch more broken stuff. Rather than being able to just live a long life, this version of Optimus Prime is literally immortal, meaning he can’t die from natural means.
Puppy: Rather than being limited to a few forms, this Optimus can also scan his surroundings and create a new form for himself—let me demonstrate.
[Puppy raises a small Optimus Prime action figure out from under the desk, much to Kitty’s amusement.]
Kitty: You still hold on to those things?
[The action figure stays put, seemingly staring down Kitty. After a few moments, the figure shifts to resemble a much smaller form of Kitty, but with Optimus’ red-and-blue color scheme.]
Kitty: …huh?
[The action figure leaps forward, tackling Kitty into the ground!]
Puppy: Heh…in IDW, Optimus’ trailer serves as a “dimensional storage” of sorts, meaning that he essentially has a sub-space storage pocket on hand at all times.
Kitty: …you’re having too much fun with this!
Puppy: He can merge with other Cybertronians, resist multiple things like heat, acid, ice, and unlike tradition, he isn’t affected by magnets. Through specific means, he’s even able to summon the giant Cybertronian Metroplex to aid him in battle!
Kitty: [Throwing the action figure across the room and standing up, she speaks again] …and the Matrix also gets a huge buff here—it can create life from nothin’, and even affect and destroy concepts, proven when Optimus used it to completely nuke the Infraspace, a singularity built up by pure information. He can even use it to pull off a robo-exorcism!
Popup: The power of Primus compels you!
Puppy: Believe it or not, Optimus also gets another pretty powerful weapon from here, too. Enter the Star Saber, a legendary blade wielded by the first Transformer, Prima.
Kitty: …is everybody here’s name some variation’ of “Prime” at this point…? Well, the Star Saber was unlike no other sword—it could snuff out stars and crumble planets into dust.
Puppy: And that’s listing the very least it can do. This legendary blade can travel through dimensions and project energy, and at it’s very peak, it could even crumble the entire Transformers multiverse!
Kitty: It follows an Excalibur type existence, where it can only be held by those deemed worthy by it. The fuckin’ thing’s not even alive—how does that work?
Puppy: It’s unknown—in fact, most of the Star Saber’s existence is a mystery. All we do know is that it fell into the hands of Optimus Prime—
Kitty: And GodDAMN ro-bro could man that thing! He’s cuttin’ down Decepticons left-and-right even easier than before!
Puppy: He’s gone toe-to-toe with IDW’s Megatron, who was capable of matching a force who could shatter entire planets, and he’s outsped Megatron’s buddy Soundwave, who could travel over 5 Light hours in mere seconds!
Kitty: And an enraged Optimus is the real definition of “fuck around and find out”. When he was bloodlusted, the dude could stomp the universe-controlling Nova Prime, break the Monstructor, who could survive attacks from multiple Decepticons at once and even murder Galvatron in cold blood! Y’know, the same dude who could easily rip Megatron in half.
Puppy: He could take out Thunderwing, who’s survived multiple city-breaking blows, and fight Shockwave, who had the ability to combine a group of universes into one. Kitty: And with the Matrix of Leadership, Optimus could even destroy the D-Void, an ancient and mysterious entity who encompasses an entire universe, meaning that the Matrix possibly possesses enough power to take out an entire damn universe! Things are gonna get a lot crazier, though, ‘cause it’s time for the insanity known as Alternity!
Puppy: A text story based on the Transformers, Alternity focuses on the events that take place 900,000 years after the normal events of Transformers, where the Cybertronians can ascend into celestial forms and join a group called the, well, “Alternity”.
Kitty: ‘Course Optimus’ old buddy Megs is up to no good again, and he decides that it’s a pretty good idea to summon the Hytherion, a beast that munches on time itself, to destroy Earth. Petty.
Puppy: In order to combat the Hytherion, Optimus himself would need to ascend to the Alternity and fight the beast. But it turns out that being part of the Alternity meant that you also have to become a being that embodies every version of yourself across the multiverse.
Kitty: Alternity Prime can literally shape and bend reality to his whim, and control space-time as a whole. It’s kinda like reality is Optimus’ silly putty, and he’s absolutely goin’ to hell with it.
Puppy: He can simply erase others from existence, change their structure down to the molecular level, stop time, create and duplicate timelines, travel between dimensions, create weapons, regenerate from the worst wounds, change size and do so much more.
Kitty: This Optimus is capable of punchin’ out the Hytherion, who can devour entire timelines and even universe streams! Being in the Alternity alone comes with a few perks, though, because it means you’re part of a massive true form that’s as big as multiple worlds, and that pretty much all of your abilities from the past and the future are all rolled into one package.
Puppy: This Optimus can literally rip through other timelines and keep up with opponents in the past, present and future simultaneously, and he can even just snatch people from other timelines and universes.
Kitty: Don’t you remember when these guys were just action figures you could pick up from a CVS? Now they’re blowin’ up and reformin’ universes…sniff…they grow up so fast. There’s also a bunch of other alternate forms of Optimus, too!
Puppy: Like Shattered Glass Optimus, the Optimus Prime of an “inverted universe”.
Kitty: Y’know, where the bad guys are good and the good guys are bad…this Optimus leads the Autobots, yeah, but this time, they’re eeeevil!
Puppy: He’s the opposite of the Optimus we know, having cheated his way to the top of society and created the Autobots solely for universal conquest.
Kitty: There’s also Armada Optimus, who fights for truth, Justice and the Autobot way…hey, didn’t we just cover that?!
Puppy: Shh…this Optimus fights to stop robot-Satan Unicron from being brought back to life, and he tries to make multiple allies ranging from humans to other Cybertronians, and he can fuse with them to create more powerful super-modes!
Kitty: And then those super-modes can fuse with other Transformers and keep goin’ until you get a super-fuckin-duper form!
Puppy: He’s also great at warning you not to sit close to the television.
Kitty: Ahhh, Optimus Prime…always lookin’ out for the kids. There’s also Bayverse Optimus, who’s our favorite Autobot represented in movie form!
Puppy: Apart from plentiful explosions and property damage, this Optimus’ story is a bit different from the normal one’s. Rather than being a librarian who was resurrected, this Optimus was a badass from the start, serving as a Knight of Cybertron and leading the resistance against the Decepticons.
Kitty: He’s also got a few more transformations, too. He can turn into a Peterbilt 379 truck and eventually a Star 5700!
Puppy: …you really know your cars.
Kitty: Yeah, growin’ up ever kid’s had one of three phases—superheroes, trucks or fuckin’ demolition vehicles! About demolition, Michael Bay’s movies are absolutely about explosions.
Puppy: And it seems his Optimus is, too, because he’s equipped with a grenade launcher, laser blasters and a forcefield to protect himself, ‘cause when the going gets tough—
Kitty: The tough literally create knives and blades from their arms and are essentially a one-man army! His Matrix can resurrect fallen allies and even help fight back against his life force bein’ taken from him.
Puppy: Optimus also has his fair share of crossovers, too. He’s been an Angry Bird before, the Red one specifically, and this one has an Energon Shield and an EMP Stunner that can disable technology.
Kitty: He can also access an “Energon Prime” form by using more Energon, and he has two transformations—those being a semi truck and a robot form. And when he needs to blow somethin’ up, he’s also got an Energon Airstrike on hand. Puppy: And he’s been in Fortnite, adding more actual guns to his arsenal and giving him the ability to build and glide.
Kitty: It’s inescapable…he’s been in G.I Joe, Marvel, Evangelion, Roblox, Mars Attacks, My Little Pony and even the M&Ms!
Puppy: Even with this all, though, Optimus has his fair share of weaknesses. He follows a strict code of honor where, unless nothing else can be done, he must always choose the most peaceful option, and he has an overarching value for all life.
Kitty: And if his Spark is harmed, it does a LOT to him. ‘Course he’s still an inspiration, a hero—Optimus Prime proves that no matter what stands in your path, enough hope can help you through it all.
Puppy: …you’re getting a lot better at this.
Optimus Prime: “In any war, there are calms between storms. There will be days when we lose faith. Days when our allies turn against us...but the day will never come that we forsake this planet and its people.”
Intermission[]
Puppy: Alright, the combatants are set, and we've run the data through all possibilities. Feel free to vote for who you believe will win in the poll: https://strawpoll.com/eNg69x7NRnA
Kitty: But now! IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLLLLLLLLLLE!!!!
Pre-Fight[]
The Earth slowly moved in space, the sunlight encompassing half of the planet. A world we all know, a bustling place and the nestle of all life—but our focus was on the moon.
Not far from the Earth was the moon. A spherical satellite made entirely of gray rock that orbits our planet, the moon was about to house part of the greatest fight the universe had ever seen.
Multiple blue and purple flashes appeared on the moon, each one being sparked by clashing metal and lasers. The blue flashes soon gained the upper-hand, and the purple flashes were quelled soon after.
On the surface stood one giant Cybertronian, alone over a pile of fallen Decepticons. His red and blue colors made him instantly recognizable—it was the leader of the Autobots, Optimus Prime.
The energy axe that was glowing in his hands slowly dissipates, and Optimus steps away from the fallen Decepticons.
BOOM!
A sonic boom caught the Autobot’s attention, though, and he shifted his body back to look at the source of the sound. Flying above the moon dust was a figure who, despite being smaller than Optimus, was still quite muscular. He bore a large grin and a red-and-yellow “S” on his chest. This was Superman.
The Kryptonian landed slowly on the ground, cracking his knuckles. “Tell me, what’s your name?”
“I am Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots.” Optimus introduces himself, skeptical about the new figure.
“I am Superman, leader of the Justice League…don’t be worried, I come in peace.”
Superman’s grin slowly faded, though, and he lifted a crossed arm to point towards the pile of Decepticons.
“But did they come in peace, too? You’ve done enough damage, Optimus.” Superman coldly says.
“Do not misinterpret what I’ve done, Superman.” Optimus replies, steeling himself for a fight. “These are Decepticons—they merely wish to conquer your world and exploit it to their whim.”
Superman crossed his arms and rose an eyebrow, his expression shifting into one of inquiry. “While I would normally believe you—you’ve done this work without any sort of authority to make sure that the work you’re doing is good, clean and in the American way…”
"Hmph.” Optimus’ arm twitched, and an energy axe began to slowly materialize in his fist. Relentlessly pressing on protecting his innocence, Optimus fought back. “Do not mistake my deeds as ill. I merely aim to protect, not destroy.”
“…you’ll still have to come with me, Optimus. I can’t really base my views on you off your words alone…in fact, I can see you readying a weapon.” Superman’s eyes glowed, implying he had used X-Ray Vision.
Optimus’ eyes widen, but he kicks back and fully creates the energy axe. “If you want me to come with you, you’ll have to make me.”
“Your mistake.” Superman chuckles, stepping back as well and getting into a fighting stance.
“One of us must stand…” Optimus slowly says, his eyes shrinking to slits.
“So the other must fall!”
Fight art by Duragoji
(Cue: Wings of Iron - DEATH BATTLE! [Timestamp: 0:26])
FIGHT![]
Optimus quickly begins the fight by lunging forward and swinging his energy axe downward! Superman barely blocks the blow with his arm, and the two are caught in a deadlock.
“Stronger than you look?” Kal-El chuckles, pushing forward with more force. Optimus, however, goes for the more strategical approach and presses the Ion Blaster, which was equipped in his free hand, against Superman’s chest. The Autobot quickly pulls down on the trigger and fires from the Ion Blaster, the discharge being strong enough to send Superman blasting into the sky!
“Far stronger.” Optimus replies, digging his metallic feet into the moon’s surface and soon leaping into the air, following after the recovering Superman. The Autobot grabs Kal-El by the legs and begins to violently spin around, eventually letting go and sending Superman rocketing into the ground.
Optimus follows again, darting downwards to attack his Kryptonian foe, but Superman manages to fly out of the way in time, bolting away and out of sight. Optimus lands on the spot where the Man of Steel just laid, and looks around in confusion.
When suddenly, from the side of the moon opposite to where Superman had just flown comes a blue blur—Kal-El, who quickly flew by and delivered a punch to Optimus’ chest before flying into the distance again.
Once Optimus had figured out what his opponent was doing, he attempted to evade the oncoming attacks but was quickly swept up in a repeat of Superman circling the moon and hitting on the way back.
The Autobot finally catches on to the flow, though, and outstretches both arms, halting Superman’s flight and ensnaring him in both arms. “I’ve heard Kryptonians could hit hard, but I didn’t know that they were clever, too.”
Optimus releases Superman and begins a relentless onslaught of punches and kicks before finishing with a knee to Kal-El’s gut, sending the Kryptonian barreling away from the Autobot.
“Well…let’s see if an old dog can be taught new tricks—!” Superman tries to joke, but he’s quickly caught off-guard by Optimus transforming into a truck before his eyes and quickly driving towards him, ramming into Kal-El and dragging him across the dirt as the truck pressed on.
After dragging Superman through the dirt, Optimus transforms back into his original form above him and leaps upward, cocking his Ion Blaser at Superman. The Autobot releases a barrage of blasts that all strike the Kryptonian and create a giant cloud of moon dust that obscures the area.
Optimus nimbly lands and begins to walk away from the Kryptonian, who had managed to burst out of the ground and spread out his arms, dissipating the dust cloud!
“I won’t go down that easily!” Superman smiles and his eyes glow a bright red, heralding the lasers that would fire from Kal-El’s eyes and strike Optimus’ Ion Blaster, knocking it out of his hand.
“I can tell.” Optimus retorts, forming an energy axe in his hand. The Autobot leaps forward and swings the axe to the side, barely missing the dodging Kryptonian. Superman responds by reeling a fist back and forcing it forward, driving it straight towards Optimus’ chest.
Optimus manages to block the blow with his axe, though, and he pushes his head towards Superman’s, his eyes illuminating and soon giving way to bright lasers that hit Kal-El’s face and slightly singe it.
The Man of Steel responds with his own laser-eyes, though, and both strain to outdo the opponent’s laser-vision, with Optimus gaining the upper hand—only for Superman to open his mouth and breathe, the chill of his breath catching Optimus’ off-guard and halting his lasers.
Using this opening to his advantage, Superman kicks back and speeds forward in flight, continuously knocking Optimus away with punches. Superman manages to circle the moon a few times while doing this, which isn’t exactly the best idea, because with his sleight of hand, Optimus managed to grab his Ion Blaster from the surface of the moon when they flew over that spot.
The Autobot pointed the blaster at Superman and fired, the discharge halting Superman’s flight and freeing Optimus from the onslaught. The Autobot hit the ground and slid, firing three subsequent shots from the Ion Blaster towards the recovering Superman.
“Gah—!” The Man of Steel was struck by the first shot, but he caught on for the second two, batting the first away and deflecting the other towards Optimus.
“I have been in battle for eons, Superman! You think I haven’t caught on to tactics like this.” Optimus chortles, wielding his energy axe again and splicing the deflected Ion orb. The orb parts to reveal Superman’s fist coming right after it, striking Optimus in the face and causing him to stumble back.
“Are you sure about that?” Superman teased, following up to his attack with a blast from his heat vision that Optimus is quickly able to block, his energy axe absorbing the heat and preventing the Autobot from being harmed.
“Roll out!” Optimus heartily yelled, his body shifting into his truck form again. He manages to outpace Superman’s heat vision and drift to face the Man of Steel, the exhaust pipes on the top of the truck turning towards Kal-El as well.
Superman backs up to comprehend the situation, only realizing that his opponent had cornered him against a moon rock. “Clever, you’ve put me on the backfoot!”
Optimus, despite being in truck form, still chuckles. The exhaust pipes all open fire at once, peppering the Man of Steel with laser blasts. Kal-El smiles and his eyes glow red again, and he jerks his head to the side to cut through every blast at once with his laser vision.
“You’ve got spirit, Optimus!” Superman compliments his opponent, who speeds forward and rams into the Man of Steel, pressuring him against the moon rock. “As do you!” Optimus replies, increasing his speed and breaking through the rock, slamming Superman into the ground as he does so.
The truck continues to speed forward before drifting to face Superman, who quickly stands up and opens his mouth for a clever counterattack—he exhaled his freeze breath as Optimus’ truck form rapidly approached. That section of the moon’s ground began to freeze up and cause Optimus to slip and slide, switching him back to his normal form and sending him rolling towards Superman.
As Superman braced himself, Optimus materialized two energy axes in his own hands. While he was sliding on the ice, he smashed the blades down and staked himself into the ice, allowing him to swerve around and kick Superman in the chest, sending the Man of Steel a few feet back.
“You are holding back, Kryptonian…” Optimus states, getting back on his feet. He rips his energy axes from the ice and stares down at Kal-El, who still wears a grin. “If you want me to come with you, you will have to try harder than that.”
“You should hope I’m still holding back!” Superman replies, quickly darting forward with his fist pulled back. Optimus counters with the same attack, quickly sheathing his axes and running forward, his own fist colliding with Superman and creating a sonic boom!
“I’m ending this—!” Optimus gruffly yells, using his free hand to raise an energy axe behind his head. He’s cut off by Superman putting more force into his punch, though, which is enough to crack the ground below them and send Optimus into the air.
Midair, the Autobot draws the Ion Blaster again, repeatedly pressing down on the trigger and firing blasts of energy at Kal-El. The Kryptonian moves at super-speed to avoid the shots, his body vibrating while doing so, and he kicks his legs into the ground. Forcing his hands upward, Superman takes off in flight and bolts towards Optimus, readying a punch and clenching his teeth.
Once Superman got in close proximity to the Autobot, Optimus delivered a quick backhand to Kal-El’s face, forcing him to the side and halting his readied attack. This grants Optimus a brief reprieve, which he uses to ready his energy axe and swing it to the side, batting Superman away from him.
Superman quickly recovers midair, only to be struck by a perfectly-aimed shot from the Ion Blaster. This creates an orange cloud of energy that obscures Kal-El—but when the smoke clears, an unfazed Superman still soars above the ground, the energy merely brushing away from his body.
“My favorite.” The Kryptonian smiles, taking a brief lull from the fight to brush his shoulders, soon following that act by speeding towards Optimus again. They interlock multiple blows and continuously hit back, creating a blur of blue light that illuminates the surface of the moon. The blur begins to move to different spots in seconds, indicating that one of them has gained the upper hand and knocked their opponent away.
The blue blur suddenly dissipates, with Superman having won the short clash, allowing him to strike Optimus into the ground. The Autobot’s landing is far from graceful—he lands on his side and the impact stirs up a small cloud of moon dust.
Optimus still regains his composure and transforms into truck form, the front part of the vehicle exhaling flames and propelling Optimus into the air. This allows him to reach the height of Superman and spin around, the truck’s trailer catching Superman and locking him inside!
The Autobot returns to normal form, releasing the trailer and sending it crashing into the ground below, slightly cracking the moon’s surface and crushing Superman between the trailer and the ground.
Optimus’ jetpack fizzes to a stop, and he lands next to the fallen trailer. “You are certainly more than meets the eye, Superman.”
“So are you, Optimus.” Superman’s muffled voice spoke through the trailer. “But flattery won’t save you from justice!” He proudly declares from inside the trailer, making way for a blinding red light that slices through the metal trailer and splits it in two!
To his chagrin, Optimus realizes that his makeshift defense was useless, but even then he still presses on, his jetpack propelling him towards the newly emerging Superman. Two energy axes materialized in his hands, and the moment he reached the vicinity of Kal-El, Optimus flipped the blades to face his neck, essentially forcing him into a makeshift execution.
“Slow down there.” Superman chuckles, his eyes illuminating and releasing another round of heat lasers that strike Optimus’ head and cause him to release his axes.
The Man of Steel delivers multiple subsequent punches to Optimus’ chest, delivering the final one with enough force to push the Autobot back to the ground, sending him skidding through the craters. Superman halts his flight and slams back into the moon, dispersing waves of dust on impact that spread across the planetoid.
“You have a chance now to step away, Optimus. Maybe if you prove your innocence, we can even let you on the League…” Superman crosses his arms, standing stern and stalwart.
Optimus would have none of that, though, and he quickly retorts. “I fight for the freedom of all sentient beings, Kryptonian…your offer is intriguing, but I still have things to do.”
“Hmph. We could really use strength like yours.” Superman grunts, and in mere seconds he speeds over to Optimus, attempting to deliver another punch. This time, the Autobot swerves out of the way to dodge the blow and soon grabs the approaching Superman in a bear hug, throwing the Kryptonian over his head and into a moon rock, splitting it clean in two.
Superman, despite being dazed by the attack, still tries to counter. He fires more lasers from his eyes into Optimus’ jetpack, heating it up and causing it to slowly grow into darker shades of red. Optimus catches on, though, and he flips Superman back around, throwing the Man of Steel into the ground before him and creating a smaller crater.
“Strength isn’t granted, Kryptonian, strength is EARNED!” Optimus leaps into the air and yells, pointing the Ion Blaster down at Superman. He repeatedly fires at the ensnared Kal-El, each shot driving him further and further into the moon—until one good shot sends him fully through the planetoid, splitting it in half and sending Superman plummeting towards Earth!
Optimus lowers the Ion Blaster, hovering over the divide between the two pieces of the moon. “You fought well—“ the Autobot tries to compliment his opponent, but he’s cut off by his jetpack fully overheating due to the laser vision used on it earlier.
BOOM!
The jetpack detonates, sending Optimus blasting through the divide at such a rapidly-growing pace that he’s able to catch up to the falling Superman in moments. The two collide just above the atmosphere, and they both catch on fire due to their entrance into our world.
Engulfed in flame, Optimus still manages to hold his Ion Blaster tight, and with a quick jerk to the side, the Autobot fired three rounds at Superman. Each orange shot of energy nearly collided with the falling Man of Steel, but he was able to outpace two of them and raise his hand—finding purchase in the center of the ion blast and destroying it entirely.
Despite these failures, Optimus still continued his onslaught, each shot growing faster than the last. Superman sent himself into a downwards spiral to avoid the oncoming rounds and tilted his head to face the descending Optimus. The Man of Steel dilated his eyes and quickly generated more energy in his pupils—the energy coming out in the form of his laser vision that strikes the inside of the Ion Blaster, sparking a small explosion that knocks the gun out of Optimus’ reach.
“Is it not a rule in your league that you should leave the things of others alone?” Optimus grumbles, mildly angered by the loss of the Ion Blaster. The Autobot kicks his feet back and the thrusters there do their work, igniting and pushing him forward.
“You should’ve been careful where you pointed that thing.” Superman quietly jokes, pushing himself forward and uniting his hands, allowing him to deliver a heavy sledgehammer to Optimus’ face and increase the speed of his descent.
Despite being both on fire and barreling towards North America, Optimus still retained consciousness and grip on his energy axes, meaning he could still counterattack while he had the chance. The Autobot propelled himself to the Man of Steel’s level and swung his axes to the side, providing the force sufficient to slightly scuff Superman’s suit and blast him far underneath Optimus.
“…great scott…” Superman mumbles, regaining his composure and looking down at the area they were falling into—the bustling city of Metropolis.
The Man of Steel cocks his head back to Optimus, and his eyes begin to illuminate—but the Autobot cam knocks the Kryptonian completely off-kilter by throwing his energy axe at Superman’s eyes and slightly burning them.
Superman quickly rubbed his eyes and groaned, only to open them to the sight of Optimus, now in his truck form, charging towards him. He rams into Superman, pushing him even further towards the city and towards a black-and-gray skyscraper.
On the ground, multiple people looked up towards the falling heroes—one of them being a little boy, holding tightly on his mother’s hand. “Look…look, mommy! It’s a bird…”
The mother shifts her eyes up to the skyscraper, noticing the same sight. “No, it’s a plane.”
The young boy closes his eyes to slits and looks closer. “Heh…it’s a truck!”
The mother can finally make out the red-and-blue truck, only now realizing how dangerously close it was getting to the skyscraper.
Superman attempted to hold Optimus back, but the Autobot’s vehicular charge proved superior, allowing him to run the Man of Steel straight through the upper levels of the skyscraper and splice it from the rest of the building, sending it tumbling below at an alarming speed.
Superman finally manages to overpower Optimus and throw him to the side, now noticing the falling debris. After a few milliseconds, the Man of Steel realizes what this meant for the people below.
Optimus shifts back to normal form, sounding a few metallic clicks, and he notices the breaking building tumbling to the ground. In perfect sync, Superman and Optimus both say to themselves, “Oh no.”
The rubble closes in on the mother and child below, both of them seemingly accepting their fates and holding each other close.
…but hurriedly darting to the ground are the two heroes who land directly next to each other—the very impact of their landing creating a small crater in the road. Their outstretched arms prevent the rubble from colliding with the familial duo, and their wide smiles ensure them that everything will be okay.
Giving a vocal countdown, the two launch the piece of the building back to its original position, clicking into place almost perfectly. The mother and the child weep and flee the scene immediately, leaving the Autobot and the Kryptonian standing alone in the small crater. They’re breathing heavily, and they don’t speak.
“Impressive.” Optimus compliments Superman, drawing the Ion Blaster once more and impressively spinning the massive rifle around, finally tightening his grasp once it was pointed at Superman’s chest.
“All in a day’s work.” The Man of Steel smiles and crosses his arms, steeling himself for what was to come.
Optimus pulls the trigger and releases a massively powerful discharge from the Ion Blaster that’s strong enough to send Superman flying away at point-blank range! Optimus’ feet-thrusters start up again, and he follows the Man of Steel’s barrel through the skies.
Optimus reels his arm back, holding the energy axe in a ready position, but he’s cut off by Superman grabbing his arm the moment he swings it down—leaving him vulnerable and allowing Superman to throw him to the side with one arm.
“While I would love to show you around Metropolis—there are people living here, and our fight would be a little too risky. Sorry if this hurts a bit.” Superman says, spinning his arm in a windmill motion before throwing his fist forward, forcing against Optimus with enough force to send him rocketing into the horizon! Superman smiles and bolts further forward, attempting to catch up to the Autobot.
Optimus whizzed through the sky, bolting above a pair of ice fishers. He finally hit the ground and rolled across, his barrel ending unceremoniously with a smash against an iceberg. Optimus staggered back to his feet and looked around—his opponent had punched him all the way over to an iceberg!
A sonic boom alerts him of Superman’s arrival, but before he can react, the Kryptonian exhales his freezing breath, creating a layer of ice that pins Optimus against the iceberg.
“I’ll get the rest of the League down here to pick you up…it was an exhilarating fight, though—“ Superman approaches the frozen Optimus and chuckles, but his compliments are interrupted by Optimus’ free head smashing forward and into Kal-El’s face. Having metal forced against his head was something the Man of Steel had faced before, but the sheer unexpectedness of the attack was what sent him tripping backwards.
The ice around Optimus slowly cracks, and once the Autobot outstretches his arms, it crumbles. He lands on the ice below with poise and draws an energy axe, subsequently charging towards the recovering Superman.
“Not interested in coming with the league, huh?” Superman grumbles, his face shifting back into a smile. He reels his fist back and prepares to throw a punch at the oncoming Optimus.
“I think this just about sums up my interests!” Optimus yells as he bounds forward, sliding his energy axe against the ice and creating sparks from the heat. He lifts the axe from the ice and holds it over his head, swinging it downward at the Man of Steel.
Remaining undaunted, Superman merely slides back to dodge the blow and leaves the axe to slam into the ice, cracking it and forcing chunks of the glacier towards Superman, temporarily blinding the Kryptonian.
Once Superman clears his eyes, he’s met with Optimus’ fist driving into his face and causing him to lose his footwork and stumble. The Autobot continues his assault, though, delivering another fist to Superman’s abdomen and finishing it off with another punch to Kal-El’s chest.
“I will admit, Superman—you are a refreshing sight.” Optimus voices in his normal gruff tone, pulling his fist back for another punch. He throws it, but it’s blocked by the Man of Steel’s raised fist. “Is that so?” Superman questions before stepping back and forcing his own fist forward, hitting Optimus’ chest and putting him on the backfoot against the glacier.
“Us Cybertronians had shared a close bond with Krypton for many eons. We fought side-by-side and it was terrible news when your planet was destroyed…” Optimus explains, raising his Ion Blaster. “What’s refreshing is that there is still a Kryptonian walking.” The Autobot chortles, firing a few rounds from the Ion Blaster.
“And I’m sorry about your planet as well, Optimus…I did my research, yes.” Superman tries to give a suitable response to Optimus’ consoling while simultaneously avoiding the Ion Blaster’s discharges. Kal-El sinks his foot into the ice and uses it to propel himself forward and sucker-punch Optimus’ head to the side before pressing his hands against the Autobot’s chest—pushing him forward and above the iceberg.
Once in the air, Superman readies his fist for a punch before delivering it directly to Optimus’ chest, sending him rocketing into the icy waters below.
Superman stays midair and crosses his arms, clearly waiting to see what Optimus would throw next.
Bubble…bubble…
In an instant, the waters part and reveal a fully intact Optimus holding his Ion Blaster tighter than before! In fact, the force splitting the waters was an incredibly powerful beam of orange energy spouting from the Autobot’s rifle!
The beam rushes towards Superman, intensely blowing his cape and his hair. The energy collides with the Man of Steel, forcing him upward and in the same path the blast followed. The beam grew in size, ripping apart the icebergs underneath and finally exploding into a giant burst of light that hurls Superman further down into the ice, completely cracking the glacier and creating a giant crater.
“Feeling exhausted yet, Superman?” Optimus either taunts or genuinely asks, his gruff tone making it hard to distinguish. Superman slowly stands up from the inside of the crater, stretching his arms and smiling.
“Not exhausted. I feel alive.”
(Cue: Alive - Brandon Yates)
Superman bursts from the crater and rams into Optimus, launching the Autobot into the cracking glacier. Optimus lands with a hard skid but manages to utilize it as a slide, allowing him to point the Ion Blaster upward and fire more smaller blasts of energy at Superman.
The Man of Steel weaves around these blasts and cocks his head towards Optimus, unleashing lasers on the Autobot. Optimus uses the ice to his advantage to slip away and avoid the lasers, using his feet thrusters to force him up to Superman’s level. The Autobot stays on the offensive, moving his left arm into place to protect himself from the lasers and repel them back at the Man of Steel.
Superman halts his laser vision after realizing he couldn’t bypass his opponent’s defense, and he starts a midair brawl against Optimus. The Autobot attempts a heavy spin kick, but Superman catches the massive foot of the Autobot and uses his free hand to press against Optimus’ foot and throw him away. He follows up with a reeled-back fist and forces it into Optimus’ chest, blasting him even further away.
Optimus uses his failure to overpower Superman to his advantage, though, and in his hands he readies two energy axes, seemingly creating them from thin air. His thrusters push him forward, and he swings the axes at Superman, managing to drive both blades into the Man of Steel’s chest.
“I swear, on my Spark, I will not be the one to fall…!” Optimus yells in effort, finally managing to push down on the axes enough to throw Superman into a forward spiral.
The Autobot draws the Ion Blaster once more, and with a lot of trigger action and impeccable aim, he fires a large shot from the blaster that sends Superman rocketing away. The speed of the Kryptonian's fight engulfs him in fire and he bolts through a forest, cutting down each tree on impact. The Man of Steel finally slows down and crashes into one last tree, tipping it over.
Following in suit was Optimus, who stuck an epic landing, fist in the ground and all, and drove a small crater into the ground. "Is it pleasant when it happens to you?" The Autobot said, raising his Ion Blaster and firing a large ball of energy at the Man of Steel.
"Deja vu...but I'm definitely going to feel that in the morning," Superman raises himself to his feet, twirls his arm and drives his fist into the Ion Blaster's discharge, snuffing it out. The Kryptonian pushes forward and readies a punch directed to the Autobot's chest, but Optimus' on-point reflexes allowed him to catch Superman's blow and throw a punch of his own. Fist is met by fist, blow met by blow--it seems that the two are caught in an eternal deadlock, the constant collision of metal and fist disrupting the calm ambience of the forest. Optimus increases the speed at which he throws his punches, though, which overwhelms Superman and allows the Autobot to grab him by the fist and throw him overhead, slightly pushing the Kryptonian into the air.
Superman quickly recovered, though, and he slammed into the ground as hard as possible, the sheer force of his landing being enough to uproot the nearby trees and tear them apart. "Had your fun yet?" Superman grins and his eyes light up, releasing an incredibly quick and incredibly large beam of light that speeds towards Optimus.
"There's a thin line between a fight and a tragedy...so I'm ending this..." Optimus grabs two of the nearest uprooted trees. He pulls them back, and time seems to slow down, and the beam creeps closer to the Autobot.
"NOW!"
Optimus smashes the trees together, hitting hard enough to create a shockwave that instantly scatters Superman's lasers and blasts the uprooted trees into multiple little pieces. The shockwave is also strong enough to push Superman back and further through the forest, prompting the Man of Steel to raise his arm to protect himself from the powerful wave. "Not bad! You almost had me there."
Superman pushes his arms forward and powers through the shockwave, flying towards Optimus and closing his fist. The Autobot was prepared, though, and he swung at Superman with his energy axes, driving them into his shoulders and causing the Kryptonian to wince in pain. Optimus puts his hands together and raises them above Superman's head, delivering a heavy sledgehammer to the Man of Steel and hitting with enough force to send Kal-El ripping through the ground and falling through the Earth at an alarmingly fast pace.
Superman tears through the ground, eventually colliding with the core of the Earth. While it was certainly hot, it wasn't a sun and couldn't give him the power boost suitable to prepare for the incoming attack--an energy blast sent from Optimus, who hit with perfect aim despite standing thousands of kilometers above his target!
The blast strikes Superman head-on and sends him shooting through the other side of the world, breaking a hole through an unfortunate car. Superman still rockets away from the attack, though, and more and more shots from Optimus, who was firing through the hole Superman created, hit the Kryptonian and increased the speed at which he was sent away.
With a mighty fizz, Kal-El eventually collided with the sun--touching the surface alone rejuvenated him! The soreness left his muscles, and the short dip in the star had cleaned his wounds. "Up, up and AWAY!" Superman yelled, kicking his foot against the sun and propelling himself away in a burst of golden light.
Back on Earth, Optimus stood over the Superman-shaped hole, peering down and inspecting the other side. He saw the golden light of the core, yes, but it seemed to be getting bigger...and bigger...and BIGGER! "...what is that?--"
BAM!
Superman rose from the hole with newfound power, uppercutting the Autobot and pushing him upward! The Man of Steel swung his arm around and caught Optimus by the neck, preparing a baseball pitch of sorts. In mere moments, Superman easily heaved the Autobot behind his head and loosened his grip, throwing Optimus further into the forest!
With a confused expression etched on his metallic face, Optimus plants his feet atop one of the few remaining trees, breathing and stretching his arms. "...what exactly did you do down there?" The Autobot inquires, wanting to learn more about Superman's sudden increase in power.
"I didn't have much left in me...so I got a little boost." Superman chuckles before zipping towards the Autobot at a breakneck pace. He slams into Optimus and dents his durable chest before forcing his shoulder downward in a solar-induced frenzy, slamming Optimus into the dirt below.
On impact, Optimus converts into truck form and begins to speed through the forest, eventually building enough momentum to turn at an angle and ram into a much larger tree, splitting it in two. Optimus shifts back and rolls forward to catch the tree before leaping towards Superman, using the timber as a makeshift lance.
Optimus forces the tree forward, running it into the Man of Steel's abdomen and getting an exhale out of him. Optimus reels the tree back and subsequently forces it in again for a harder strike, but Superman catches it and takes control, propelling himself forward and spinning around Optimus, creating a miniature tornado that keeps the Autobot in place.
Superman's eyes glimmer, and in a split-second, the Man of Steel has used his X-Ray Vision to pinpoint all of Optimus' weak points. He slowly tows the tree back, and with a "Catch you later." Superman SLAMS the tree forward, sending Optimus rocketing above the clouds, leaving a trail of smoke as he flew.
Optimus tore through the clouds, transforming into truck form the moment he broke the mist. His thrusters managed to keep him soaring, with Superman following in suit.
"You are incredibly strong, Superman...I am glad that Krypton left behind a real hero to continue their legacy." Optimus admits, twitching to face Superman and pulling his exhaust pipes down--eagerly beginning to open fire on the Man of Steel, pelting him with laser shots. Kal-El dilates his eyes and they erupt with one large laser that's strong enough to cut through all of Optimus' individual lasers and allow the Kryptonian to press forward.
"Thank you, but truly--strength...hngg!" Superman grunts in exertion, bolting forward and pushing his hands against the front of the vehicular Optimus, attempting to push him away. "...is a burden!"
Involuntarily, the Matrix of Leadership inside of Optimus had finally acted as a failsafe of sorts, creating a light wave of energy that forces Superman away. "I know that feeling--to have so much power, and yet, with a single slip-up, you can put someone in danger."
“With every move…the force of an atom bomb.” Superman’s voice shifts from enthusiastic to a mere melancholy one, and he speeds towards Optimus and delivers an uppercut to the front of the Autobot’s truck form, sending him flying further into the clouds.
“With every noise…an explosion.” Optimus adds on to the statement, his body piecing itself back into his iconic Autobot form. His arm shifts towards Superman, fires retaining a tight grip on the Ion Blaster, and Optimus shoots one large blast at the Man of Steel, who readies his arm to simply swat it away. “But we must soar…”
“So others may walk another day!” Superman smiles, batting the blast away–paying no mind to its direction until he was alerted by a large BOOM!
Both heroes halt their battle to look at the source of the sound, and to their horror it was a plane that happened to be nearby…now bearing a gaping hole in the side due to being struck by the redirected Ion Blast. Both heroes turn towards one another and simply nod before speeding away to the rescue!
Superman appeared in a flash, standing next to the hole. While he was inhaling, Optimus followed and stood underneath the plane, supporting it in the air. Superman looked at the frightened passengers, giving them an assuring wink, before blowing out cold air that materialized into ice to patch the hole.
After easily finishing the job, Optimus heaved the plane over his head and slowly pushed it back on pace, allowing it to return to its flight. Before continuing their battle, Kal-El and Optimus waved to the passengers inside—a melancholy moment interrupted moments later when Optimus swung a newly-formed energy axe at Superman, knocking him back through the clouds.
Superman begins to spiral, but he recovers himself in time and regains his balance. His eyes turn to Optimus, who rose above the clouds and delivered multiple swings of his energy axes in rapid succession. Superman evaded all three blows and pushed forward, slamming his knee into the massive metal chest of Optimus. Despite the Autobot’s eclipsing size, this still does notable damage and pushes him back. “Next time, watch your weak spots…”
Superman slams his fist into Optimus’ head, hitting the Autobot with enough force to rocket him downward and into the city below, blowing a giant crater into the road that was fortunately empty. When the dust cleared, standing alone in the crater was Superman, who had tried to attack the moment Optimus crashed into the ground—but he was nowhere to be found.
(Cue: The Eye of the Tiger - Survivor)
“Come out, Optimus…I’ve already told you…we’ll be merciful, we’ll let you on the team…we just need to truly verify that what you’ve been doing is good…” Superman tries to bargain with Optimus—despite not being in his range of sight, he knew that the Autobot was nearby. “I can’t even find him with my X-Ray vision…” He grumbled to himself.
“I told you.” Superman heard Optimus’ gravelly voice from behind him, and he turned around in an instant. “I’m not interested.” The Autobot, now in his truck transformation, spoke as he sped towards the Man of Steel. The light inside of his eyes pulsated as he moved on, and laser fire soon erupted from his exhaust pipes.
Superman is peppered with beams, which he stood his ground to try and tank—but it was useless, as these lasers were somehow stronger than before. With each shot, Superman was sent further back until he smashed into the bottom of a giant office building, his impact breaking the glass of both the buildings’ windows and the windows of a nearby car, much to the disappointment of a nearby citizen. “Sorry about that.” Superman apologizes, breaking free from the crater and bolting back at Optimus.
Superman throws an incredibly powerful punch at the Autobot, who tilts his shoulder to block the blow and absorb most of the force, causing him to only slightly flinch. With a sheepish smile and a little more elbow grease, Superman throws an even stronger punch to Optimus’ shoulder, which moves the Autobot a little more and, on a much larger scale, drives the crater even deeper.
BLAM!
BLAM!
BLAM!
Each blow breaks more ground and sends cars flying, but Optimus stands undeterred. He pulls his own fist back and throws it at Superman, who outstretches both arms to push against it.
“That’s amazing–! Hnnghh… How did you do all of that?” The Man of Steel enthusiastically inquires, putting more effort into his defense.
“The Matrix of Leadership that resides in my chest…it serves me when I need it most, and to be honest, it has saved me from many situations before.” Optimus puts in more effort by extension, and he manages to force Superman on the backfoot.
“I believe it.” The Man of Steel chuckles, opening one fist and firing lasers into his palm, which closes and compacts the energy—forcing the fist into Optimus’ and instantly overpowering him, scuffing the Autobot’s hand and sending him tumbling through the streets and into a car, which bore a civilian inside. Optimus quickly got on his feet and turned his tumble into a slide, allowing him to grab the car, raise it over his head and set it back down to protect the civilian from his own approach.
Optimus’ slide still carried dangerous strength, though, and his foot broke through the roads and sent rubble scattering in the air. Optimus utilized this for his offense, though, grabbing the stray pieces of rubble and beginning to throw them at Superman, who pushes his chest outward to simply destroy the pieces on impact. Kal-El crosses his arms and bolts forward, delivering a heavy kick to the chest that sends Optimus blurring upwards, high enough to view the entire city.
The Autobot’s body begins to break up and piece itself back into the form of a truck, and Optimus begins to speed from building to building to avoid the oncoming Superman, who attacks with laser vision. The lasers hit the ground seconds after Optimus covers it, breaking small chunks away from the buildings. Optimus drifts and lands atop a silver skyscraper, transforming into his normal form and drawing two energy axes. “It is about time you caught up, Superman!” Optimus taunts, seemingly beckoning Superman to come closer.
“Funny.” Superman grumbles—he did find the Autobot’s quip to be pretty funny, if not a bit unexpected, but Optimus was too slippery a target for him to have much fun with. His feet smash into the roof of the skyscraper and he speeds forward, pulling his fist back and preparing a punch…which wasn’t such a good idea, because Optimus had a well-thought out ploy, and he leaped over the incoming Kal-El, grabbing onto his right leg with one hand and raising an energy axe with the other. He slashes it at the Kryptonian, slightly ripping his suit but failing to mark his skin. “Kryptonian fabric is tough…” Superman smirks, halting his flight and leaving Optimus dangling over the city, with Superman’s foot being the only thing holding him up. “But you seem to be tougher, hmm?”
“...pure Cybertronian spirit is the toughest!” Optimus heartily yells, yanking down on Superman’s leg and pushing him to his level—allowing Optimus to force the Kryptonian into a bearhug, trapping him between his massive metal arms. Optimus quickly descends, and Superman is hampered from even making a move, leaving him repeatedly saying “Clever…clever…”.
Optimus smashes into the road, driving Kal-El into the dirt and wedges him between the pavement and the organic ground, greatly marring the superhero’s suit. “A fun game, Superman…just come next time with a better hand.” Optimus gruffly says, brushing himself off and walking away.
“A better hand…? I’ve been playing with fives this entire time…” Superman pulls himself out of the dirt, quickly shaking the dirt away from his blue suit. “Now it’s time to crank it up to a royal flush!” Superman hollers, outstretching his arms and expelling solar energy in the form of a giant flare that greatly harms Optimus and sends him rocketing into the air, somehow leaving the city unharmed.
Superman rockets after Optimus, and with one incredibly heavy punch, he sends the Autobot bolting out of our atmosphere and into space in a matter of milliseconds. Superman turns around and takes one more look at the city, sighs, and follows Optimus.
In space, Optimus Prime stood, fazed but not mortally harmed from the attack. He awaited Superman’s arrival, his back illuminated by the millions of stars behind him.
Superman soon appeared in a blur, noticing Optimus’ hand stretched behind his back. “About time you used something new, huh?” Superman says, giving a chuckle.
Slung behind Optimus’ back was a massive, illuminated sword composed entirely of raw metal. It was only wielded by the worthiest, and Optimus’ hand rested comfortably on the handle. “No matter the cost—I must survive.”
Optimus rose the blade, causing it to begin to emit a blue aura. Its brightness was of a caliber comparable to the light of the stars themselves… hence the name, the Star Saber.
“Primus…grant me the strength I need!” Optimus quickly got into a fighting stance, holding the sword like a knight of medieval times. Superman’s eyes rested upon the impressive blade, prompting the Kryptonian to click his tongue. “A very impressive sword, Optimus…is it like Excalibur?”
“Only the worthy wield this blade…” Optimus declares, quickly propelling himself forward and delivering three subsequent slashes to Superman’s chest, each one hitting before the Kryptonian could react.
Fizz…
Flames appeared in the spots where Optimus had struck, and in mere moments, they detonated and sent Superman rocketing through the galaxy and into a moon, driving straight through it. Not skipping a beat, the undaunted Optimus blasts before Superman, quickly delivering another sword slash to the head of the Kryptonian, creating a strong wave of energy that knocks Superman down and through the cosmos.
“...so it is Excalibur!” The Man of Steel smirks through the heavy beating, quipping about the Autobot’s legendary blade. Superman uses a nearby meteor to kickstart his own counter-flight, and he extends both arms forward, granting him the ability to protect himself from an oncoming slash from the Star Saber, even if it took great effort.
“I…am well versed in your culture…!” Optimus grunts, pushing the Saber further down. “This blade functions quite like Excalibur, but this one…can crumble planets to dust!”
Superman smiles in response. “Impressive…! But it’s my turn.” The Man of Steel shoots a light blast from his eyes, causing Optimus to lose his balance and release the Star Saber, leaving the massive blade floating in the cosmos. Superman sped up and grabbed the blade, lifting it despite the sword eclipsing him as a whole.
Optimus shakes his head and recovers from the burn, his eyes opening once more to an awe-inspiring sight. Kal-El held the Star Saber over his head, the massive blade illuminated by the stars and lights behind the Kryptonian.
“You…you are worthy.”
Superman chuckles and clenches his fist around the Star Saber’s hilt, swinging it around a few times simply for practice. “Huh…guess I am!” The Man of Steel smiles, promptly thrusting the blade down and creating a multicolored wave of energy that fires from the sword and begins to expand as it approaches Optimus.
“While it is an honor to be able to hand the blade to another—I’m afraid I’ll have to take that back.” The Autobot wields the Ion Blaster, aiming it at the wave of energy. While even his massive size was molecular underneath the Star Saber’s attack, Optimus still fired with enough fearlessness and precision to strike the wave in the center and destroy it entirely.
Once the energy wave fully dissipated, Optimus’ eyes darted around the vast expanse behind it—Superman was gone, and so was the Star Saber. Suddenly, Superman flew in from behind Optimus, delivering a heavy blow but speeding off before Optimus could counterattack. Superman comes from another direction, and another—trapping Optimus in a current of Star Saber slices that’s only broken through when the Autobot grabs Superman by the neck with his massive hand and plucks the Star Saber away from the Man of Steel. “Next time, hold tighter.” Optimus chides, throwing Superman a good distance away only once the Star Saber was secure in his own hands.
Optimus’ throw was a lot stronger than intended, because Superman was launched close enough to a faraway sun to gain a slight boost in power. The Man of Steel kicked at the sun to push himself towards Optimus, a gold beam trailing behind Superman as he closed in on the Autobot. His punch collided with the Star Saber, creating a discharge of energy that knocked planets away from their original spots. These two objects, fist and sword, collided and collided time after time, each blow having more of an effect on the area around them.
BAM!
BAM!
BAM!
The Star Saber eventually overpowered Superman’s fist, and the Man of Steel recoiled from the force of his own attacks. Optimus took advantage of his opponent’s small window of vulnerability and heavily bowed the Star Saber down, taking Superman with it and throwing him into a moon below them. “You may throw everything at me, Superman—but I will not give up.” Optimus boasted, still holding the Star Saber at the ready.
Superman struck the ground, the impact cracking half of the moon and shoving it away. Kal-El grabs the moon before it can fully drift away, though, and with incredible effort, Superman manages to lift the moon over his head. It was much larger than the moon they had scuffled on earlier, but Superman was still able to push his arms forward and launch the planetoid at the Autobot. “Have it your way, then!”
Optimus’ preparedness paid off, though, and he raised the Star Saber over his head—seemingly charging it for a massive attack. The blade glowed and emitted a powerful blue aura, and Optimus readied it for the massive incoming moon. “Because I must stand…”
The blade is swung sideways, seemingly having no effect on the giant moon before him.
“You must fall!” Optimus yells, finishing his slash and leaving a blue trail of light to show where the sword was swung, and that expanded into a cut that spanned the entire moon. The planetoid was split in half, both pieces being sent rocketing into different directions due to the following explosion between the halves.
The two halves had also parted to reveal the oncoming Superman, who threw a punch to the unexpectant Optimus, blasting the Autobot a good distance away. He accidentally let go of the Star Saber halfway through his flight away, prompting both heroes to outstretch their arms and try to call the blade to them.
Both Superman and Optimus were worthy of the blade, though, and it stood still, seemingly unable to choose a side. The struggle for the Star Saber continued until Superman sent two lasers driving into Optimus’ chest, catching him off-guard and allowing Superman to call the sword forth. The Man of Steel sped towards Optimus with his opponent’s massive blade and swung it down, with the Autobot countering by smashing down a large energy axe he had heaved over his head. The blades collide and launch the Star Saber out of Superman’s hand—allowing Optimus to grab it instead and get the jump on the Kryptonian. Optimus forced the blade into Superman’s chest, not actually piercing it but hitting hard enough to blast Superman out of the Autobot’s vicinity.
Optimus shifts into truck form, driving himself forward and straight into the Man of Steel, pushing against him harder and harder with each passing second. The front wheels grinded into Superman’s legs and eventually caused them to give out, knocking the Man of Steel into a ragdoll position while on the front of the truck.
Superman manages to press his face against the truck-shaped Optimus, and he exhales, covering the front of the truck with a layer of frost that hampered the wheels slowly until causing the truck to come to a full stop. Superman broke free and pulled his fist into a punch, delivering it to the windows of Optimus’ truck and launching him further into the cosmos.
Optimus shifted back to normal and he grabbed the Star Saber, which was once again slung over his back. The Autobot raised the sword and it began to illuminate the dark skies themselves, outshining the stars and creating an energy around the blade large enough to eclipse the blade itself. Optimus yells at the top of his metal lungs…
“LET’S ROLL!”
The massive blast of energy is released from the blade, charging at the Man of Steel. “Deja vu…” Superman chuckles, his eyes glowing in response. He pushed his feet back, effectively staking him despite him being in the void of space. “But despite what you said earlier, I can’t fall either…the world needs someone to always be there…the world needs a Superman.”
Superman crosses his arms and counterattacks with his laser vision, driving the beams against the rapidly growing blast of Optimus’ energy. The attack soon expands and expands, with Superman’s lasers being the only thing holding it back. After a climactic struggle, the lasers pierce the outside of the energy attack and strike the inside, detonating the energy and creating a blast large enough to spread across that entire solar system and throw planets around.
(Music stops)
Standing alone in a nigh-empty solar system were two figures, Kal-El and Optimus Prime. They had both survived the mass-scale attack, and they were brushing themselves off. Before they could fight again, though…
VWOOMP!
From all corners, large gray-and-purple flagships appeared from the horizon. Some were small and skinny like falcons, while others were large and more heavily-armed.
“Decepticons…” Optimus mumbles, readying the Star Saber and creeping closer to Superman.
“You thought that we wouldn’t notice that massive light, Optimus and Optimus’...uh…friend, huh?” One booming voice spoke from the flagship—the largest of the ships. “Prepare to fall, Optimus. You, your friend and all Autobots…:
“We have had our differences, Superman…I hope that you can at least assist me in fending these barbarians off. They aim to exploit your world.” Optimus says, offering his hand for a handshake.
The Decepticon ships ready their weaponry, aiming at the two heroes…
“You don’t have to tell me twice!” Superman chuckles, swinging his own hand in and high-fiving the Autobot leader, the force of that alone being enough to create a giant shockwave that pushes the ships away!
TEAM-UP!
(Cue: Starman - David Bowie [Timestamp: 0:51])
The two disconnect hands, and in the span of a few milliseconds, they’ve darted similar ways and have begun their defense against the Decepticons.
Superman weaves through heavy laser fire, speeding to the top of one of the larger ships with Optimus following in suit. With the help of the Star Saber, Optimus cuts a hole large enough for both of them over the cockpit.
Inside, one Decepticon feels a tap on his shoulder. Turning around (with all of the other Decepticons in the room following) he’s greeted by both Superman and Optimus with readied fists.
WHAP!
The Decepticon is sent tumbling into the ship’s controls, detonating them and launching the other Decepticons into each other before they could attack. The cockpit was in kahoots, which allowed the two heroes to take their leave back into space.
“I think we work better together than against each other! Y’know, I think this has been more of like…a spar between us instead of a chase!” Superman smiles, signaling Optimus to unsheathe an energy axe.
“Perchance…” Optimus replies, holding the axe at the ready. The Man of Steel cocks his head down and fires his laser eyes at the axe, which effectively reflects the beam and amplifies its power, sending one giant beam at a Decepticon ship, exploding and cauterizing the front of the craft once the beam reached.
Optimus slowly shifted the axe to the right, causing the beam to creep to the left, striking more ships and crippling them instantly. Despite the strength of this attack, though, many ships still remained, and they didn’t skip a beat in fighting back. Superman and Optimus were under heavy laser fire, but they braved through it and sped towards the Decepticons.
Atop one of the spacecrafts stood a giant Decepticon, holding an axe with a blade composed of purple energy. This Decepticon managed to block an oncoming Superman, throwing the Man of Steel to the ground. “PREPARE TO—”
WHAP!
The Decepticon is struck by Optimus’ own energy axe, cutting into his shoulder and causing him to drop his weapon. Optimus lifts the Decepticon by the axe, and swings it to the side, throwing the villain away from the ship and into space. Superman kicks himself up, flying to Optimus’ level. “Nice work.”
Optimus chuckles and his foot thrusters ignite again, allowing him to soar to another ship. Superman does the same, reaching the ship and plowing through it. He breaks through the other side, holding a pile of Decepticons despite their massive size compared to him, and he throws them further into outer space. Optimus smashes through the outer layer of the ship and manages to get ahold of the wiring, ripping it apart and causing the ship to detonate on the spot.
“They’re killin’ us!” One Decepticon yells, scrambling around inside one of the few remaining ships. “It’s Optimus and some little guy…! A Kryptonian! Everyone, fight back!”
The doors on the ship open, spilling out Decepticons, who were all armed with different weapons. They all speed towards the two red-and-blue heroes, who stare them down without fear.
“Kill ‘em both! Kill ‘em both!”
Superman smiles and begins to exhale towards the oncoming mass of Decepticons, launching a layer of frost at them. It manages to shut the villains into a cluster and freeze them in place. Optimus draws the Ion Blaster and looks for the perfect spot to hit, deciding on the middle.
BLAST!
The cluster explodes, sending the Decepticons into different directions! One of them lands on the ship Optimus and Superman stood atop, shifting into a slide when he hit the ship. He pointed his own laser rifle at the two, but Superman countered with his heat vision—striking the opening of the rifle and causing it to detonate in the Decepticon’s hands. “Don’t even.”
There was still one problem to deal with; the remaining Decepticons, who recovered from the blow, were charging towards the heroes. As one final attack to the villains, the Kryptonian and the Autobot both reeled their fists back and struck the approaching Decepticons with a blow so heavy…
POW!
It sent all of them rocketing away and into the moon! The fleet was gone, and alone in the center of space stood Superman and Optimus Prime, both bearing aching bodies and tired eyes.
“I’ve never…felt this exhilarated!” Superman smiles. “But that’s no reason to stop now!”
Kal-El’s voice raises with the last word, and he rams into Optimus with his shoulder. The Autobot presses forward, attempting to throw Superman away from him.
“Agreed, Superman…you have certainly put up quite the fight!” Optimus cheerily responds, knocking Superman away and drawing the Ion Blaster. With one quickly-charged beam that enveloped a mass of planets and stars, Optimus managed to launch Superman away and into a star.
Moments after Superman collided with the sun, it detonated—dispelling yellow light that was quickly pulled in and absorbed by Superman. Standing in what would have been the center of the previously standing sun was a golden figure, the light surrounding it outshining the stars themselves. It was Kal-El, but rather than a welcoming blue-and-red, his body was covered in an almost divine gold hue.
Superman sped towards Optimus at speeds so fast that the Kryptonian moved simply as a blur, and he delivered a devastating punch to Optimus’ chest, striking him so hard that a rip in reality forms around the two, unfurling and revealing a new sight—figures similar to the two, but different in so many ways.
…
(Cue: Deceptive Tyrants - Brandon Yates)
Replacing Optimus was another Cybertronian with a similar build, but he was covered in a purple coating. This was Shattered Glass Optimus, a version of the hero that had swapped allegiance, and he was hit by a blow similar to the one the original Superman dealt. The Decepticon was sent barreling backwards atop the metal spacecraft he stood on with his opponent.
His opponent was Superman, yes, but also with a different appearance. He stood more stern and his suit was gray, holding the sickle-and-hammer symbol of the Soviet Union. This was Red Son Superman, and he meant business.
“A Decepticon doesn’t fall for such pitiful offense!” The Decepticon Optimus boasted, quickly rising to his feet. He drew his own energy axe, this one bearing a purple colored blade, and he swung it down at the Soviet Superman.
Kal-El countered with an aggressive strike to Optimus’ leg, pushing the Decepticon away and causing him to release his energy axe. The Soviet kicks his feet back and propels forward, yelling a pompous “For Mother Russia!” while he pushes Optimus off the spaceship and into the fray.
Two opposing sides, the Decepticons and Earth’s own futuristic military, quarreled around the two alternate heroes. Soviet Superman pushes against Optimus, knocking him down to another spaceship and through laser fire. Skidding across the ground, the Decepticon manages to regain his balance and point his laser rifle up at Superman, releasing repeated shots at the Soviet.
Superman avoids each blast and darts down towards the Decepticon, preparing a punch. However, this Optimus managed to force him into a perfectly timed headlock, trapping the Soviet Man of Steel beneath his metallic arms.
“You are a pig!” The Decepticon pushes his arm tighter against the Red Son’s neck, causing blood to spill from his mouth and eyes. “So squeal!”
The Soviet manages to break free from this Optimus’ grip, releasing him and giving him enough legroom to onslaught the Decepticon with laser eyes, each one burning into the metal flesh of this Optimus. “And you are an affront to the perfect world—without you, humanity shall soar!”
“Either way, humanity will fall on their own!” The Decepticon Optimus snarls, rushing through the laser fire and swinging his arm to bat the Red Son away. “Falling under our superior rule will only speed up the inevitable!”
“The only inevitable thing here is your DEATH!” Soviet Superman yells, flying forward and delivering a sledgehammer to the Decepticon’s face, sending him falling face-first into the metal of the spaceship. His head rips through it, and the Decepticon is left stuck.
The Red Son begins to absolutely wail on the ensnared Decepticon, each punch slowly breaking into the exterior of Optimus. Chunks of metal are sent scattering in the air, and the Decepticon begins to simply break into pieces.
“One must simply give up in the face of a superpower like Mother Russia…but you are persistent, so prepare—”
SHINK!
The energy axe rips into the Red Son’s gut, throwing him away from Optimus. The Decepticon uses another energy axe as a crutch, and he points the weapon towards the recovering Soviet. “You talk too much.”
The Decepticon sprints towards the Red Son, swinging his axe downward. The blade cuts into the metal below but barely misses the Soviet Man of Steel, who stumbles backwards to avoid the cut. The Decepticon took no lulls, though, and his head jerked upward and fired a round of smaller lasers from his eyes. They strike the Red Son’s eyes and temporarily blind them, causing his eyes to shift away from offense and towards his face.
“Aghh!” The Soviet screeches, his eyes failing to open due to being cauterized shut by the opposition’s own lasers. Relying on instinct alone, the Red Son flails around, attempting to throw a good punch. “When I am done with you—I’ll have to tell your comrades that the same is coming for them!”
The Red Son manages a blow to the Decepticon’s chest, forcing the massive Cybertronian to the ground. The evil Optimus quickly responds by firing another ion blast towards the blinded Kryptonian, who fails to sense the oncoming attack and is struck to the ground.
The Decepticon Optimus capitalizes on this and grabs the Red Son before he can land, holding him with immense force. The Soviet Superman is ensnared by the powerful grip of this Optimus, leaving him struggling to break free.
“You’ll now die a nobody—a forgotten weapon of the past…” The evil Optimus monologues, clearly not expecting the next move.
BLAST!
The lasers from the Soviet Superman’s eyes pierce the Decepticon’s chest, causing him to release the Red Son. The Kryptonian slinks back and soon propels himself forward, ripping the Decepticon Optimus’ head from his body.
“You talk too much.” The Red Son coldly says, crushing Shattered Glass Optimus’ head without effort.
…
(Cue: One Shall Stand - Therewolf Media)
The rift in reality explodes into a massive light after the killing blow is dealt to the alternate Optimus, with the short clash between the two heroes being granted a similar result. Superman gains the upper hand, the victory of his alternate self granting him enough strength to send Optimus rocketing through a string of planets!
The Autobot smashes through the planets, causing them to crumble the moment he pierces the centers. The moment he can regain his composure, Optimus glances at the broken planets to assure himself that there was no sentient life on them. “...good.”
Optimus quickly activated his thrusters, allowing him to launch back at the supercharged Superman. He unsheathes the Star Saber and twirls it around, readying another strike! With one downward swing, the sword collided with Kal-El, who forced his arm upward to block the blade. The collision of the two forces is enough to dispel a giant blast of energy that creates another tear in reality, showing another alternate world.
…
(Cue: Bottoms Up - Brandon Yates)
The rift finally explodes, revealing a new landscape. Forcing his blade against an opponent was Optimus Prime, but with a more circular, red face. It bore a beak and white pupils—it was a bird. And a really angry bird at that. This was Angry Birds Optimus.
His opponent was the Man of Steel, but rather than steel, plastic. His blocky build, shiny hair—it was clear that this Superman wanted Optimus to lego of his weapon. Squaring off against this universe’s Optimus was Lego Superman.
“Rahh-hoo!” The avian Autobot delivers a birdlike screech, pushing himself into Lego Superman and colliding head-to-head, hitting the Man of Plastic with enough force to rocket him through Lego City and into a skyscraper, pushing multiple bricks to the ground.
“...this could help!” Superman recovers, pushing away from the comical Kal-El-shaped-hole he left in the skyscraper. He catches up to the falling pieces, piecing them together in a matter of seconds. The result—a laser turret!
The machine begins to rapidly fire laser bolts at the midair avian Autobot, who mistakes them for actual plastic, allowing the bolts to strike his vulnerable abdomen and push him back. Granted this doesn’t do much damage to this Optimus, as he’s still able to point his fist towards Lego Superman and begin to reveal his weapons! Coming out of secret arm-compartments were laser guns, rocket launchers, actual guns, bombs—and to top it all off, a single red flag in the center, inscribed with the word “BANG!”
BANG!
Each weapon fires at once, completely barraging Superman with attacks of all kinds. The Man of Plastic is struck, being flung straight through the same skyscraper, entirely uprooting the upper half of the building! The avian Autobot snickers at this devastating attack, but Lego Superman manages to break through the skyscraper, scattering pieces everywhere.
“Almost got me there!” The Man of Plastic chuckles, quickly circling around the floating pieces and constructing a giant….disco ball? Lego Superman smiles and begins to fire his laser vision into the opening of the disco ball, causing it to shoot rays of light all around.
Rather than harming the avian Autobot, the disco ball actually prompts Optimus to descend to the city street and begin to break out in dance! Multiple Lego civilians join in, creating a massive dance party on the road!
Superman rolls his eyes, crossing his plastic arms and eventually giving in. He stoops down to the massive crowd of civilians and breaks out in dance too, hitting a mean robot.
Somehow taking personal offense to this, Angry Bird Optimus stretches out his arms and legs and does the Superman, catching the Man of Plastic off-guard and even impressing him.
This doesn’t mean Lego Superman will give up, though, and he begins to spin in circles, performing a spectacular breakdance routine that ends with him forcing his square-shaped foot into the avian Autobot’s leg, causing him to transform into truck form as a fight-or-flight instinct.
As a preemptive action to stop the dance party from progressing any further, the vehicular bird suddenly rammed into Superman, launching him into a jewelry store! Crawling out of the broken glass, the Man of Plastic is covered in jewels and treasures which he quickly shakes off, save for a red gemstone.
The avian Autobot transforms back into normal form, pointing his own spherical Ion Blaster at Superman, releasing a powerful discharge that should’ve struck Lego Superman, but the gem forced in front of him deflected the beam into a skyscraper above. The rubble falls down and into the beak-bearing bot, sandwiching him between the debris and the ground.
“Hmrm…caw!” The avian Autobot crows, releasing a giant blue blast that expels the rubble and frees Optimus. A blue aura came off of Angry Bird Optimus, and his movements became faster. He had entered “Energon Prime.”
The avian Autobot lunges towards Lego Superman, who frowns moments before being struck by a punch powerful enough to blast the Man of Plastic through more buildings, separating all of them from their bases and flinging the Lego structures into the sky.
“Ouuccch…” Lego Superman rises from the crater made from his fumble, cracking his plastic back. He stretches and forces his head forward, staring down both the oncoming avian Autobot and the multiple midair buildings. “Here we go again!”
The Man of Plastic’s black eyes quickly change to a red hue, expelling two laser blasts that blow through every flying building and cause them to explode into millions of multicolored Lego bricks, catching Angry Birds Optimus in the explosion and raining the building blocks down on him.
Bursting from the cloud of dust that was once a huge part of Lego City is an unfazed Optimus, who caws one final time and draws his energy axe, spearing it at Lego Superman and impaling his chest. Landing on the ground with a skid, the avian Autobot points his hand at the ensnared Man of Plastic, bombarding him with an Energon Airstrike that crushes him beneath blue missiles and breaks him into mere Lego studs!
…
(Continue: One Shall Stand - Therewolf Media)
The breach in reality closes in on itself, revealing the real Optimus gaining the upper hand on the real Superman. The avian Autobot’s victory granted Optimus enough strength to knock Superman abroad, and strike his vulnerable opponent with the Star Staber hard enough to cut through his suit and blast him into a nearby red planet.
Superman collides with the rocky ground of the planet, smashing his feet against the ground to keep himself steady. He cracks his knuckles and forces his head towards Optimus, his eyes exerting a giant laser blast that speeds towards the Autobot.
Optimus sighs, drawing the Ion Blaster and pointing it down at the approaching laser beam. With one click of the trigger, an orange orb of energy rivaling the size of the eye-blast rams into the beam, failing to intersect with the Kryptonian’s blast and instead sparking an explosion that tears another hole in their reality, making way for another alternate battle!
…
(Cue: Downtown Battle - Transformers 2007)
This universe’s Optimus stood far above the dusty road, bearing more realistic features. He grunted and was struck by a red laser, pushing him down and into a massive oil truck. The vehicle detonates, the explosion scattering truck pieces throughout the desert road. The victim of this crash was the Bayverse’s Optimus Prime.
The oil leaks far enough to reach this Superman’s feet—the Man of Steel also bore more realistic features, and a much darker look. This was the infamously darker iteration of the Man of Steel, DCEU Superman.
Bursting from the explosion was the movie version of Optimus, whose feet created miniature craters the moment he touched the ground. He held a battle-worn energy axe, his gruff voice fortifying his look of anger. “I will take your head!”
Superman was taken aback both by the live-action Autobot’s dramatic cry and his quick lunge forward. Taking this more as a challenge than a threat, the Last Son of Krypton spins forward and delivers a strong left hook into movie Optimus’ face—which would’ve been devastating, had the live-action Autobot not forced his head forward to dodge the blow and ram into Superman’s face, instantly bloodying it and forcing movie Superman into a barrel across the road, digging a rapidly-growing trench as he skids along the pavement.
Superman catches himself, though, planting his fist into the ground and getting into a position similar to that of a professional runner. He cocks his head forward, and from his eyes spew two more lasers that go separate ways and strike the sandy ground next to the road, cracking it and eventually forcing chunks of land out of their source, leaving them dangling midair for a split second. “If the world needs one savior, it’s me!”
Movie Superman claps his hands together, creating a blast of air that launches both chunks of sandstone towards movie Optimus, who stands unfazed and holds his energy axe before him. A quick slash from the weapon manages to cleave both bunches of rock and sand in two, spreading a cloud of dust around the live-action Autobot and the crashed oil truck.
The energy axe gave movie Optimus enough visibility through the cloud—and with a loud WHAP! Optimus was struck by a heavy punch from movie Superman that knocked him even further down the road, steamrolling whatever was left of the oil truck!
Optimus shifted into truck form, his wheels running backwards, allowing him to follow as such. “A warrior like you running? Maybe I’ll give you your own offer!” movie Superman yells from afar, stretching his arms to point at movie Optimus and speeding forward, catching up to the reversing truck.
“I swear that I will take your head. Is that any better?” The live-action Autobot aggressively snaps back, releasing multiple futuristic grenades from under himself. They roll across the street and detonate conveniently under the movie Man of Steel, throwing him through the pavement before he even has time to frown!
Without pausing to recover, movie Superman shakes the explosion away and tilts his head, activating his X-Ray Vision. Despite the strength of this ability, the movie Man of Steel is entirely unable to locate his opponent throughout the vast desert expanse.
…but falling from above was the live-action Autobot, who smashes his spiked feet into the Man of Steel midair and forces him back into the hole in the road. “Prepare to—”
SKRRRT!
Rushing from the road came a small car, which was caught off-guard by the massive hole in its path and fell forward, ramming into movie Optimus! “Hnng…” The live-action Autobot grumbles, grabbing the speeding car with his hands and heaving it back, launching it over the desert with one hand.
Capitalizing on his opponent’s distraction, Superman stomps on movie Optimus’ ankle strong enough to force it in on itself! If that wasn’t enough, the movie Man of Steel only provided a “Take this!” forewarning before uppercutting movie Optimus hard enough to launch him into the sky, the civilians of the nearby town turning their heads to the sight and merely mistaking it as a rocket launch.
Movie Superman flew to movie Optimus’ level to deliver another attack, but the live-action Autobot had anticipated this and kicked his massive feet at the cinematic Kryptonian, separating them and giving movie Optimus enough legroom to perform a backflip, activate his foot thrusters and regain his balance midair, allowing him to draw the Ion Blaster and release a wave of energy that charged at Superman, who was also speeding towards the live-action Autobot.
Quickly dipping out of his prepared attack to dodge the discharge of the Ion Blaster, movie Superman still manages to keep pace with movie Optimus and charge forward, grabbing the live-action Autobot by his massive shoulder and lifting him into the air, throwing him even further upward!
Once this attack was dealt, movie Superman leaned forward and released one final round of laser eyes that charged into the live-action Autobot, quickly breaking his exterior and melting him down midair, leaving mere molten droplets remaining.
…
(Continue: One Shall Stand - Therewolf Media)
The tear in reality puts itself together, leaving us back to the original two. The laser collision finally splits, allowing Superman’s beam to overpower Optimus’ due to the victory of his alternate self and strike Optimus. The Autobot switches his stance to aim the Ion Blaster down at Superman, releasing a hailstorm of rounds in order to cancel out Superman’s charge.
“Having trouble there, Kryptonian?” Optimus teases, still launching an onslaught of ion blasts at the Man of Steel. “I'm just peachy!” Superman provokes back, pressing forward through the storm of energy blasts heading his way. He treads through them, each blast dissipating the moment Superman intersects with them. This allows him to finally hit the final shot, redirecting it at the Autobot and striking him square in the chest! Almost as if it played a part simply to decide the outcome, another alternate battle tore through reality, taking focus away from the fight for a few seconds.
…
This quick glimpse into a future reality displays the All-Star iteration of the Man of Steel tearing through the sun to deliver a massively powerful punch to the Armada iteration of Optimus, the blow being strong enough to blow the rift apart and knock Optimus even further away, signaling that the All-Star had won his duel.
…
“Hngggh…our battle crosses universes, Superman…” Optimus chuckles, reaching for the hidden Star Saber once more. “Perhaps we should make this legendary!”
“That’s the spirit, Optimus!” Superman cheerily replies, turning his head around to witness more cracks in space that show off their battle, but with an alternate-universe twist. “Give me your all!”
“You should be happy that I’m not.” Optimus replies with a hint of smugness beneath his stoic and gruff tone. He blasts forward and collides fists with the Man of Steel, creating more cracks in reality that show off more battles! One of them grows large enough to envelop the two heroes for a few seconds, being a deciding factor of sorts.
…
This one features Fortnite Superman, hiding behind a wooden wall with a shotgun in his hands. He peeks over the edge of the build only to be greeted by a bullet from a sniping Fortnite Optimus, enveloping the shooting superhero in a blue light the moment it strikes!
…
The rift explodes into a blinding white light that throws Superman into a colossal planet big enough to eclipse even Optimus! The Autobot leader points the Ion Blaster at the descending Superman and fires a blast that speeds into the Man of Steel, forcing him into the planet instantly and cracking the planet enough to explode it!
Bursting from the space debris was an unscathed Superman, who outstretched his arms and created a giant wave of solar energy that approached Optimus at speeds so fast that he couldn’t even ready the Star Saber! The collision of the two forces scatters more ripples in space, the largest one of them featuring the animated versions of the red-and-blue heroes squaring off!
…
The animated Superman has the upper-hand, releasing an onslaught of punches on animated Optimus, each one cueing a title-card the moment it hits!
WHAP!
POW!
BLAM!
The cartoon Kryptonian steps back, taking one more look at the vulnerable animated Autobot. “Get ready!” He yells before delivering a sharp uppercut to cartoon Optimus, knocking him out and sounding a bell strike!
…
This loss drops Optimus’ guard and allows him to be caught by the wave of solar energy, being thrown into a spiral and stuck in the wave’s path. The Autobot is launched away, yes, but he’s instantly met by an approaching Superman, whose reeled-back fist gives Optimus a signal of sorts. This faulty forewarning prepares Optimus to swing the Star Saber forward, causing Superman’s fist to collide with the blade instead and send out another bunch of tears in the universe!
…
“I’ll take your HEAD!” Superboy Prime, a rogue Superman, yells from inside the rift. His opponent, Marvel Comics’ Optimus, slides across the invisible ground. With his own Ion Blaster in hand, this Optimus delivers a speech from the heart!
“You are not a true hero, Superboy! A true hero acts—”
“SHUT UP!” Superboy Prime yells, throwing a tantrum and bolting through Marvel Optimus’ midsection, bisecting him instantly and spilling energon across the white void inside of the rift.
…
Another victory increases Superman’s strength even more, giving him the necessary power to smack the Autobot far away, also leaving the Star Saber in the hands of Kal-El. The strength of Optimus' thrusters prevent him from going too far, though, and he prepares to strike right back, heaving an energy axe over his head.
Superman follows in suit with the Star Saber, leading to both of Optimus’ weapons colliding between the two, expelling a shockwave powerful enough to expand the cracks in reality far enough to completely envelop the two in a colossal white void, leaving them alone.
…save for two massive alternate entities.
(Cue: Avenged Sevenfold - The Stage)
Bursting from a vein in the white void was a universe-spanning Superman. Bearing massive muscles, iconic haircut and a much more mechanical build, this was the Thought Robot, otherwise known as Cosmic Armor Superman. His massive footsteps shook the white void, and he began to speak. “You shall never get past me…” the Thought Robot’s booming voice declared to his approaching opponent.
“Perhaps there is more to this. Perhaps I can win in more than one way. Perhaps…” Another loud voice burst into hearing-range, belonging to another gigantic being. “Perhaps you can back down now.” Alternity Optimus spoke, stepping forward and holding tighter on his Ion Blaster.
Superman and Optimus both stand motionless beneath the titans, their weapons still clashing together. Above them, the Thought Robot and the Alternity Autobot’s fists collide, creating a massive ripple in the white void. They repeat this time after time, each blow hitting with more force and managing to tear the white void apart, restoring color into space.
The two beings transcend all celestial bodies with their massive size, and Alternity Optimus takes immediate advantage over this. He grasps an entire galaxy and crushes it into an all-consuming black hole, using it to amplify the strength of his sledgehammer to the Thought Robot’s face, slamming him down.
The being made of thought slowly falls on his back, steamrolling entire galaxies with his descent. Once his opponent was down, Alternity Optimus’ eyes erupted with golden lasers that struck the Thought Robot’s chest and put it up in flames. Cosmic Armor Superman dips his head back, releasing a dramatic yell of pain.
“End this…hngh…battle NOW!” The Thought Robot shouts, his booming voice shaking the entire universe itself. He sways his arms in separate directions to scatter Alternity Optimus’ beams, allowing him to roll back and plant one foot in the stars to keep his balance.
“Too many casualties are involved! They have no time to find cover!” The Thought Robot yells at the Alternity’s Commander.
They’d both like to stop.
But the story commands it.
“Something guides my blade…something beyond us both!” Optimus yells back at the Thought Robot, opening his palm. Energy is sucked from corners of the universe before materializing into a giant recreation of an energy axe, which the Alternity Commander uses in his subsequent charge towards Superman’s Cosmic Armor!
The axe slams into the Thought Robot’s defending arm, which is used to bat the axe away and create an opening for the being made of thought. The Cosmic Armor rams into Alternity Optimus, shoving him away and giving the Alternity Commander a good few moments before his opponent releases an onslaught of devastating attacks on the massive Optimus.
The Thought Robot begins with three rapid punches to the chest of the Alternity Autobot, causing him to release his axe and lose his current method of protection. The colossal Cosmic Armor soon follows up with a very heavy uppercut that plows through Alternity Optimus’ cheek, breaking pieces of metal away from it and scattering them throughout the cosmos.
The Thought Robot’s final attack is grabbing two galaxies and closing them in on Alternity Optimus’ head, which had potential to be incredibly devastating.
…had the blow actually landed. Time slowed down to a pause around the Alternity Commander, allowing him to move out of the attack’s range. “I will end this NOW!” Optimus yells once he steps behind the Cosmic Armor, releasing a devastating punch that resumes time and throws the Thought Robot off-balance.
“You can…but the story can change. The story will change.” The Thought Robot declares, kicking his feet back and readying a counterattack.
“So be it.” The Alternity Commander replies, steeling himself as well. With one more push forward from both sides, Alternity Optimus and the Thought Robot’s fists collide, sending everything around them swirling into oblivion. Both universe-spanning fighters begin to crack and shatter, and an enveloping white void proves that their universe was killed off in that battle.
…
A giant explosion in the original universe reveals that it was completely unharmed compared to the one Alternity Optimus and the Thought Robot fought in, but the multiverse-spanning clash between alternate versions still raged on and pushed the fighters away, causing them to land on opposing moons.
Aching muscles and tattered bodies on both heroes show the scars of a hard-fought battle. Both heroes still stand, though, and they ready themselves. They may be smaller compared to the size of the universe, but their booming voices could be heard by every sentient being.
“Dreams lift us up!” Superman rises to his feet, cracking his knuckles and gazing upon the universe before him. He looks towards his opponent, who prepares his own words.
“Dreams save us!” Optimus shouts from his own spot, unsheathing the Star Saber and clenching his fist around it. He stomps forward with wide eyes, also noticing the beauty of the universe.
“Dreams transform us into something better!” They both yell in unity, kicking away from the planets and speeding towards each other. Their bodies are illuminated by the thousands of stars lying out beyond them, and they charge with immense determination!
“And I swear…”
“Upon my soul…” Superman smiles, pulling his fist back. He wouldn’t hold back!
“Upon my spark…” Optimus thrusts the Star Saber forward, light beaming from its tip and providing power to the Autobot’s strike. He wouldn’t hold back either!
“MY DREAM WILL SURVIVE!”
Their fists collide and a blue-and-red aura surrounds the two. The opposing forces of fist and sword push harder and harder on their opponents’—this was it, no punches would be pulled! Their all would be given!
(Cue: The Neverending Dream - Therewolf Media)
The two pull away from the collision of fists and instead release a barrage of powerful strikes on the other, the strength of each individual blow being enough to force them apart and separate them.
Superman’s smile turned into a focusing gaze on the Autobot—without pause, he sped towards Optimus and delivered a punch so strong and so quick that it left the Man of Steel as a blur in the Autobot’s eyes! Optimus was sent hurtling into a planet he knew well—taking heavy damage but catching himself in a heroic pose. This was Cybertron.
“It is time for action—!” The Autobot’s gruff voice declares, and he runs his hands across the ground of the moon. “I feel it…”
Smashing his fist into the metal of Autobot City, Optimus’ booming voice alarms the oncoming Superman!
“RISE, METROPLEX!”
Bursting through the steel is a Cybertronian legend hundreds of times Optimus’ size! Metal and wires covered its gray skin, but it crawled out with ease despite the years it had spent waiting. Metroplex turned its eyes upon the Man of Steel, almost as if it was challenging him!
“Alright!” Superman yells, speeding towards both Metroplex and Optimus, who leap into the air together with raised fists!
Superman opens his mouth and a massive amount of ice envelops the two Cybertronians—temporarily ensnaring them, had it not been for Metroplex’s immense strength that allowed him to rip through the ice as if it was mere hoarfrost!
“Metroplex heeds the call of Prime!” The living city yells, backhanding Superman with his massive left hand and lifting Optimus Prime further towards the Man of Steel with his right, allowing Optimus to strike Superman even further away with the Star Saber!
“Metroplex, is it?” Superman smiles, cracking his neck and instantly recovering from the Star Saber strike. “Very loyal—I respect that!”
Optimus stands on the shoulders of the living city, pointing his Ion Blaster down at the Man of Steel. “Metroplex is not merely part of our city. Metroplex is our city.” The Autobot explains, heralding the massive punch Metroplex quickly sent down at Superman, who grabs onto the fist and uses it to push himself onto the arm of the living city!
“Amazing! I’ve never seen something quite like this!” Superman scuttles to the head of Metroplex, breaking into a flight around the cranium of the living city, dizzying him.
“But as they say—watch your blind spots!”
Superman grips the top of Metroplex’s head, using it to heave the massive Cybertronian into the air with his miraculous super-strength! The Man of Steel breaks into a full-body twist that jerks Metroplex to the side, and he begins to spin around—letting go in the midst of the living city’s spin, Superman launches Metroplex back into Cybertron using his momentum against him!
“But as they also say…”
Superman turns around, being greeted by a massive arm cannon composed entirely out of blue energon—and it was aimed at his face.
“Keep your enemies close!” Optimus advises, generating a colossal blast from the arm cannon that consumes Superman and expands to plow through multiple stars and planets that lie behind Kal-El.
“I recall my father saying something like that…” Superman still gives an incorruptible smile despite the immense pain Optimus’ attack brought, and he releases lasers from his eyes that break through the cannon’s blast and strike the construct in the center. This causes the energon cannon to jam and detonate, destroying it entirely and forcing Optimus to draw an energy axe, dual wielding with both that weapon and the Star Saber.
With two paired slashes of both weapons, Optimus sends a giant curved razor-blade composed of energy towards Superman, who notices in time and dodges it…
…only for the slash to rush towards Cybertron and the unconscious Metroplex by extension.
“I am so sorry.” Superman sighs before the energy slash strikes Cybertron, detonating it and sending both Metroplex and pieces of the metal planet blasting through space!
“World made of cardboard…” Both heroes mutter, before Optimus lunges at the Man of Steel with both his energy axe and Star Saber raised, swinging them down onto Superman’s shoulders.
“Do not worry, Kryptonian.” Optimus begins, halting his swing and leaving a small gap between the blades and Superman’s shoulders. “We can bring it back with the Matrix.”
“Huh?” Superman raises a stray eyebrow before he’s struck full-force by the energy axe and the Star Saber, creating an attack with twice the power of a normal strike from both! Superman is sent bolting through the cracked center of Cybertron and into the star behind it, giving him a much-needed recharge.
Superman appears before the Autobot in a matter of seconds, raising his arms and spiking Optimus through a large grey planet, cratering it and eventually splitting it in two!
“The Matrix of Leadership. It controls life—it is a piece of Primus.” The Autobot tanks the blow and soon blurs into Superman’s sight, pushing the Star Saber into the Man of Steel’s chest. The legendary blade glows brighter, and the blow forces Superman through a string of planets.
“Oh yeah. I remember you said something about that.” Veering around, Superman delivers another heavy blow, and Optimus follows with the same. Blows are dealt immediately after one another, leading into an imperceivable clash that darts around the very universe itself, the clash only being able to be traced by the ball of golden light that marks their stops.
The massive, universe-spanning clash is halted when Optimus creates a barrier of energy from the Matrix that defends him from a massive punch from the Man of Steel, instead leaving it to collide with the shield and create a sonic boom that extends and cracks planets around them—leaving the two unharmed, however.
“Dreams are a lift to all beings, Kal-El!” Superman is caught off-guard by the mention of his real name, but he’s quickly struck by a massive swing of the Star Saber that smashes into his chest and sends him plowing through stars, allowing him to absorb more solar energy. “My dream will never falter!”
“Same goes for me, Optimus!” Superman responds, bursting from the massive cloud of broken planets and rushing towards the Autobot with his fist reeled back.
“We are a crutch for all beings—we stand to inspire, to help!”
The massive, unyielding light surrounding a now golden Superman expands and breaks through the darkness of space—Superman was a beacon of hope, charging towards someone of the same vein.
“And it is my dream that all species are united! Peace is achieved!” Optimus yells, grasping his Star Saber for one final charge. Forcing it down on the rapidly approaching Man of Steel, Optimus pushes hard against the golden Superman, the light and force of the collision sending cracks throughout space, breaking it up to reveal not a new dimension—but a vast expanse made entirely out of panels consisting of things that make them up. Comic panels, things that represent who they are.
Standing alone in this expanse are Superman and Optimus, both glowing before the mass of illuminated panels. They pull back from their strong blows and ready their final stand. This was it!
“Give it your all, Optimus! For your dream—for our dreams!” Superman heartily yells, his eyes glowing a dark red one final time. Bursting forth was a set of lasers tenfold the power of all lasers before them, and they rushed towards the Autobot.
“Very well, Kal-El…I call upon you, PRIMUS!” The contraption covering the Matrix of Leadership hidden in Optimus’ chest parts, revealing the device. It begins to convulse and soon releases a massive bright-blue laser that speeds into Superman’s optical beams, colliding midair.
The beams press together, the brightness overtaking everything around them. These are real heroes—they laugh at fear, afraid of nothing. They do not shy away from the sword. They are strong enough to be gentle.
But because one of them must stand.
The other had to fall.
Superman’s beams finally overtake the Matrix’s last resort, ripping through the beam and striking the device in Optimus’ chest, causing it to detonate and signify the end of a hard-fought clash, breaking apart the realm of panels surrounding them and leaving them alone in empty space.
KO!
(Music stops)
Superman gasps.
“Oh no.”
Flying to catch the nigh-lifeless body of the last Prime, Superman’s eyes widen. He manages to hold Optimus despite the size difference, and he looks down with sorrow.
“Nonono…no…I had only meant to subdue…incapacitate…” Superman’s smile finally breaks.
“Urgh…” Optimus began to cough. His body was cracked and the opening in his chest was the only thing left glowing, his spark slowly flickering. “Tell me…Kal-El…what is your dream?”
“No…I dream of a world…a peaceful world…I dream of one where I had held back…not broken you…” Superman sighs.
“Do not worry.” Optimus coughs again, his body slowly losing movement. “You didn’t intend this—please, live on.”
With that, Optimus’ body perishes. His spark dwindles.
“I’ll find a way. I promise…”
Results[]
Kitty: …
Puppy: Hm?
Kitty: [Bursts into tears, grabbing onto Puppy’s shoulder as a crutch.]
Puppy: …ahem, both Superman and Optimus were incredibly matched, and they both held many advantages over each other.
Kitty: Sniff…yeah…while from a glance, you’d assume Superman was stronger because that’s just how he is, but Optimus actually had enough strength to keep the Man of Steel on his toes!
Puppy: They’re both capable of absurd feats. Superman’s pulled planets around, held black holes—but Optimus has done his fair share of similar feats like destroying supernova-tanking Cybertronians and such…the strength category simply came down to who had faced more.
Kitty: Really, though, Supes and Optimus have fought multiple multiversal entities, but Superman’s not only fought more powerful ones, but he’s also fought just…more of them.
Puppy: To put things into perspective, Superman faced the World Forger and even knocked him head-over-heels. Said World Forger exists above the sixth dimension in the DC universe, which, mind you, is already built of infinite layers.
Kitty: Yeah! They’re both nearly limitless, but Optimus’ feat of fighting the universe-eating Unicron simply paled in comparison to Superman’s limit.
Puppy: Optimus was, however, much more experienced. He’s fought wars for millions of years, and has much better weaponry.
Kitty: Yeah! Superman was leagues stronger, but his abilities could only do so much compared to Optimus’ star-destroying Star Saber and his concept-and-universe-breaking Matrix of Leadership. So, why couldn’t Optimus just one-tap Clark with this stuff?
Puppy: Problem is, Superman may have been eclipsed by Optimus’ experience, but he’s also fought people like Optimus, while the vice-versa can’t be said.
Kitty: But c’mon, what’s he gonna do when he gets hit by a truck…? I mean, you’re tellin’ me that this whole thing came down to who had the bigger universe?
Puppy: To be blunt, that’s certainly part of it—but Superman and Optimus were practically equal in speed and durability, with Optimus taking a slight edge in the latter while Superman edged out in the former.
Kitty: But just to show everything at a much grander scale, let’s compare their two strongest forms—the Thought Robot and Alternity.
Puppy: Alternity is massively larger than the Thought Robot at his peak, but the Thought Robot actually existed higher than it. The Thought Robot sits on the same level as the Monitors, meaning he exists on higher planes like the Monitor Sphere and possibly the sixth dimension.
Kitty: Confusing, huh? Even if he was bigger, this Optimus isn’t exactly capable of what the Thought Robot was, but he can still keep up with his feats of ripping through dimensions.
Puppy: This was a hard-fought battle for both sides, but the Man of Steel’s strength, higher potential and higher scaling allowed his dream to prevail.
Kitty: But…seriously…why are we pitting such beautiful souls against each other? I could buy these guys at Rite-Aid…and now one of ‘em’s dead! Can’t we just—
Puppy: I think you need a drink.
Kitty: Sigh…That’s a prime idea…Optimus was powerful, Auto-but he couldn’t kill-el Kal-El, and that’s just super…man.
Puppy: The winner is Superman.
Kitty: Let’s go get that drink you promised now! You’ve got the bill, right…?
Puppy: Right…
[The hosts step away, leaving the simulation screen alone in the darkness. It suddenly flashes on, showing a shot above a farm in Smallville.]
Laying on a mound of hay is Optimus’ once-broken body, now rejuvenated. Approaching it is Superman, still in suit. In his hands lies a hard drive—a small device containing the Autobot leader’s Spark.
With a smile, Kal-El pushed the hard drive into an opening on Optimus’ chest, and in a few seconds, the light in the Autobot’s eyes flickered on.
(Cue: The Touch)
“Welcome back, Optimus.”
The massive hand of the Autobot and the smaller hand of Superman come together in a high-five, the screen fading to black the moment they collide!
Next Season on Death Battle![]
This isn’t it, though! In two months, the third season will be on its way!
With 15 episodes and plenty of variety, keep your eyes peeled!
And for the premiere…
Bowser: “Not sure if you know who I am, but I'm about to marry a princess and rule the world.”
Satan: “NOTHING is hopeless when you’re the lord of Puyo Hell!”
Trivia[]
- The connections between Superman and Optimus Prime are that they are both two iconic superheroes that sport similar color schemes. They were sent from a dying planet to Earth as a last hope, and they remain symbols of peace in their worlds.
- The soundtrack title for this battle would be “Scions of Steel”, referencing both of the fighters’ important positions on their planets and their close relation to steel.
- The soundtrack cover would feature the Autobot logo plastered before both Cybertron and Krypton, bearing Superman’s “S” symbol and his red cape.
- The soundtrack title for the Red Son Superman vs Shattered Glass Optimus segment would be “Shattered Allegiance”, clearly referencing Shattered Glass’ title but also their altered allegiances in those universes.
- The soundtrack title for the Lego Superman vs Angry Birds Optimus segment would be “Build Up and Break Down”, hinting at Legos’ job as building toys and the point of Angry Birds being knocking things down.
- The soundtrack title for the DCEU Superman vs Bayverse Optimus segment would be “Polarizing Powerhouses”, because of their positions in movies that split people over if they’re good or not as the most powerful.
- The soundtrack title for the Thought Robot vs Alternity Optimus segment would be “Protecting Truth, Justice and Eternity” because of their jobs as protectors and overseers of all, Superman’s “truth, justice and the American way” motto and Alternity Optimus’ eternal life.
- The final segment of the soundtrack would be titled “The Never-Ending Dream”, because of their positions as never-ending pinnacles of hope and justice, and dreams being a huge part of their characters.