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Starkiller VS Ezio
Eziovstarkiller
Season 1, Episode 1
Vital statistics
Air date April 20, 2015
Written by Darth_Mallen
Directed by Darth_Mallen
Episode guide
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First Elsa VS Katara

Starkiller VS Ezio is the first episode of Darth_Mallen's Death Battle. It features Galen Marek, aka: Starkiller from Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, and Ezio Auditore Da Firenze from the Assassin's Creed series.

Description[]

Star Wars vs Assassin's Creed! Which of these two assassin's are deadliest?!

Interlude[]

(Cue "Invader - Jim Johnson")

Wiz: When someone has wronged you by betraying your people, murdering your family...

Boomstick: Or stealing all your money in a messy divorce....greedy bitch.

Wiz: You can always hire the deadly assassins to do the dirty work.

Boomstick: Starkiller, Darth Vader's secret apprentice...

Wiz: And Ezio, mentor of the Italian Brotherhood.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle!

Starkiller[]

(Cue Kota's Theme - Mark Griskey)

Wiz: Born to two rogue Jedi who escaped the genocide of Order 66, Galen Marek was brought up by his father, Kento, in hiding on the wookie world of Kashyyyk.

Boomstick: That's gotta be the best planet ever for hunting.

Wiz: The father and son were eventually discovered by Darth Vader and Galen was quickly made an orphan. Galen was to meet the same fate before Vader felt a strong connection to the Force in the child.

Boomstick: Vader took the kid from the planet and secretly trained him in the way of the Sith. After some pretty abusive training over several years, he became the badass Sith assassin that Vader named Starkiller.

(Cue The Force Unleashed - Mark Grisky)

Wiz: Starkiller eventually began his career as Darth Vader's personal Jedi hunter, while also covering his tracks killing everyone to cross his path.

Boomstick: I thought assassin's were supposed to be secretive and sneaky. As long as the kill someone though, I guess they're doing their job right. Anyway, like every Dark Jedi, Starkiller wields the lightsaber, a beautiful red laser sword that cuts through almost everything like butter.

Wiz: Though there are some materials that can resist it, like kortosis. He's proficient in all forms of Saber combat but prefers Form 5 or Sith Shien. This form focuses on using their opponants attacks against them and utilizing quick attacks to overpower an opponent.

Boomstick: But Starkiller's most powerful weapon is the Force, that mystical energy field that connects everything and launches people hundreds of feet in the air!

Wiz: Starkiller can throw and levitate objects and enemies, blast people away with Force push, and electrocute enemies with Force lightning.

Boomstick: And also the devastating Force Blast, which can disintegrate nearby enemies at close range. By switching to the Juyo lightsaber form in mid-combat, he can combine saber strikes with Force attacks for some devastating moves.

(Cue Duel of the Fates - John Williams)

Wiz: Starkiller has been known as one of the most powerful Force users in the Star Wars universe and after being betrayed by Darth Vader, he joined forces with an ex-Clone Wars general, Rahm Kota...

Boomstick: Who he blinded in a previous encounter...

Wiz: And trained Starkiller in the ways of the Jedi, eventually passing the Jedi Trials.

Boomstick: Starkiller is a powerhouse through and through, he's slain multiple superior Jedi, beaten the programs of Jedi and Sith through his shape-shifting robot PROXY, fought off legions of TIE Fighters and Stormtroopers, and at his full power PULLED A STAR DESTROYER FROM ORBIT! This man could give Chuck a run for his money!

Wiz: Well, considering no-one knows where he ended up we can't test that theory. Despite his amazing feats, Starkiller's sanity has been called into question. Also his tenacious fighting style can leave him open from other angles.

Boomstick: He's also pretty light in terms of armour and weaponry, since his training gear offers little protection against anything.

Wiz: Also...he's a bit gullible. Despite having the ability of foresight it didn't stop him from being stabbed and killed by Vader, attacked by PROXY and ambushed by an entire Imperial battle fleet.

Boomstick: Despite these flaws, Starkiller could easily wipe out his opponant before his even gets out the gate.

Starkiller: Vader can't stop me now. Nothing can.

Ezio[]

(Cue Ezio's Family - Jesper Kyd

Wiz: In renaissance Italy, in the city of Florence lived a family called the Auditores. Within that family was a young man called Ezio. His childhood as a Florentine noble was typical, involving not working, getting into fights and chasing women.

Maria Auditore: You should find a more creative outlet.

Ezio: I have plenty of outlets.

Maria: I mean besides vaginas.

Boomstick: Little did Ezio know that that humble banker dad of his was actually a high ranking assassin. But before he could be told that, a conspiracy against his family took place and his dad an brothers were killed in front of him... sound familiar?

Wiz: Ezio then escaped with his mother and sister to his uncles home, where he revealed Ezio's heritage as an assassin and began training him in their ways.

(Cue Brotherhood E3 trailer soundtrack)

Boomstick: Over the next 40 years Ezio would hone his skills and climb the ranks of the assassin order, eventually reaching the rank of Grand Master of the Italian Brotherhood. His weapons of choice are the trademark hidden blades, and was one of the first to make the smart and awesome decision of using two.

Wiz: His blades were adapted over the years by Leonardo...

Boomstick: The ninja turtle?

Wiz: Da Vinci.

Boomstick: Awh!

Wiz: To hold many different attachments, including a small pistol, a poison needle and a hook. However these attachment do take time to trade between. And despite being lightly armored he does wear an almost indestructible metal bracer.

Boomstick: But the hidden blade isn't the only weapon in his arsenal. He carries a short sword, throwing knives, smoke, caltrop and cherry bombs, and a crossbow for silent long range kills. Even unarmed he can easily use his enemy's weapons against them, easily disarming them and leaving them totally helpless.

Wiz: But the most powerful weapon in Ezio's pouch didn't come from Italy. Tens of thousands of years ago an advanced civilization existed and created powerful weapons called Apples. After their civilization was destroyed these Apples went missing until one fell into Ezio's hand.

Boomstick: After overcoming it's temptation Ezio became adept in it's use. The Apple can control people's mind and create duplicates of the user, including the weapons they held at the time, although they will disappear after a fatal blow. And after a decent charge the Apple can kill a man instantly.

Wiz: Ezio is committed to the ways of the assassins and is an expert at blending into a crowd for a quick escape. And having a high concentration of First Civilization blood, Ezio is able to use Eagle Vision and Eagle Sense. This allows him to discover his target, and sense where he's been and where he'll end up, and can quickly work out the best strategy to eliminate his prey.

Boomstick: He's a master of the art of killing, taking care of dozens of historical figures, fought off an entire Spanish army almost singlehanded, destroyed Da Vinci's war machines, incinerated an entire fleet of warships, and even in his old age could take on much more athletic Chinese killers with a fire poker. He might be only human but he's got the skill and stealth to finish this fight from out of nowhere.

Ezio: Nulla è reale, tutto è lecito. Requiescat in pace

DEATH BATTLE![]

Venice, Italy. Nighttime. Starkiller is walking in a crowd of people. Ezio is perched on top of a domed building, eagle sense showing Starkiller as his target and where he'll end up. Ezio leaps into a haystack, and as Starkiller passes the haystack Ezio engages his hidden blade, attempting to assassinate the Sith apprentice. Starkiller suddenly grabs Ezio's arm and throws him into the open. Both assassins arm themselves as the fight begins.

FIGHT!

The two leap towards each other looking to land a strike with their swords. The lightsaber however cuts through Ezio's sword rendering it useless. Starkiller swings his laser sword and launches Ezio with a Juyo force push. Ezio hits a wall but as Starkiller leaps to finish the assassin quickly, Ezio drops a smoke bomb and moves out of the way of Starkiller's blow. The smoke gives Ezio time to change to his poison needle and give a quick strike to Starkiller's leg. This disorientates him when the smoke clears, giving Ezio time to climb the nearby building, get out of sight and fit his hidden blade in one arm and his pistol in the other.

Starkiller composes himself and looks for Ezio. He looks up and spots him diving towards him for the assassination. Starkiller uses the Force to stop him in mid-air and throw him to the ground. Starkiller then runs towards him, blocking the knives thrown by Ezio, and begins to swing his blade. Ezio avoids the strikes, stabs Starkiller in the arm and disarms him, taking his lightsaber for his own.

Starkiller then looks at Ezio with the Apple in his hand and launches a barrage of lightning at him. However, he simply disappears. Starkiller turns and sees several more Ezios around him, all wielding his lightsaber. One by one they strike at him with their various weaponry. And each one Starkiller disposes of, two more appear. All the Ezio's then move in to deliver the killing blow to a wounded and frustrated Starkiller. With feet left to spare, the sith warrior crouches and releases a force blast that vanishes all the Ezios, minus one (the real one), and destroys a large portion of the city, leaving a broken area for the remainder of the fight.

Starkiller's lightsaber falls to the floor, which he retrieves with the force, ignites it and charges towards Ezio. Ezio gets to his feet and fires his pistol, which is easily blocked. Apple in hand, Ezio charges it, a golden glow surrounding him. At the last minute a golden beam of light erupts from the Apple straight towards Starkiller. With lightning reflexes and in slow-mo, Starkiller absorbs the beam with his free hand, spins and fires lightning at the assassin which knocks him back further but still on his feet. Starkiller jumps with his saber above his head. Ezio raising his braced hand in hopes of defense, but the lightsaber cuts through it, removing Ezio's hand and with a final spin slices Ezio in half through the abdomen.

K.O.

Starkiller picks up the Apple, pops it up in the air and slices that in half too.

Conclusion[]

Boomstick: Man, that was closer than I thought.

Wiz: Ezio is definitely the more experienced fighter and has a much more varied arsenal. The Apple was also able to fool Starkiller long enough to give Ezio the advantage for a while.

Boomstick: But in the end, Ezio couldn't compete with Starkiller's sheer power. Although Ezio's feats may have been impressive in his universe, he was against a man who pulled around 40 million tons of steel out of the sky.

Wiz: It also didn't help that Ezio didn't have any weapons to withstand the lightsaber. And while the bracer is almost indestructible, it wasn't enough to withstand a cannonball in the opening of Brotherhood. But Ezio is certainly the better strategist and tactician.

Boomstick: But strategy and tactics can only go so far if you don't have the right tools for the job. Compared to a sith assassin, Ezio is simply half a man.

Wiz: The winner is Starkiller

Next Time on Death Battle[]

A chilling wind blows and snow blows across the screen as the opening piano notes for "Let it Go" plays, as we then see a picture of Elsa. The screen then freezes over sharply. A voiceover is heard.

Katara: Let's do this.

Trivia[]

  • The connection between Ezio and Starkiller is they are both assassins trained from childhood with mystical elements included in their arsenal
  • This is the first What-If Death Battle by Darth_Mallen
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