Spider-Man (Peter B. Parker) VS Mr. Incredible is a What-If? Death Battle created by XarXel. It features a somewhat composited Spider-Man from Marvel Comics with the main focus on the Spider-Verse movies, and Mr. Incredible from Pixar's The Incredibles.
Intro[]
Wiz: "Peter B. Parker, the Amazing Spider-Man."
Boomstick: "Robert Parr, also known as Mr. Incredible."
Wiz: "The biggest challenge our greatest heroes face are not their big nemesis, but old age."
Boomstick: "Well, there's also public image, but that's a whole 'nother beast. Still, to still fight for the greater good after settling down and having a family to look out for is a commendable service to keep hope alive. *sniff* He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!"
Wiz: "And it's our job to test their weapons armor and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE!"
Peter B. Parker[]
Boomstick: "Alright, let's do this one more time. This is Peter Parker; an average nerd at a school with bullies array, with only gaining a few friends, like Harry Osborn, Gwen Stacy, and his love interest MJ, living with his aunt and uncle like Luke Skywalker - cuz his actual parents died in a plane crash. But his life would change from the bite of a radioactive spider."
Wiz: "This gave Peter the superpowers of a spider, because radiation doesn't tend to be lethal in comics. This allows him to cling to walls, regenerate from scratches and broken bones, enhanced senses, and sense danger & react to it on instinct, a precognitive ability called the Spider-Sense. With all these new found abilities, his 15 year old mind exploited it, creating a flashy red suit for wrestling money, finally releasing his aggression against bullies."
Boomstick: "Hah, reminds me of summer school. This all went to his head, so egotistical he let a robber get away because he wasn't paid enough. Guess he missed the part where that's his problem. Don't worry, he'll find out soon enough."
*gunshot*
Boomstick: "Uncle Ben, what happened!?"
Wiz: "The same robber he let go has murdered his Uncle Ben. Once finding out it was his fault, Peter vowed to always uphold Uncle Ben's greatest lesson; 'With great power comes great responsibility'. He'd fight for everyone he cares about, against all the threats to Queens, like Green Goblin, Doc Ock, Sandman, Mysterio, Electro, and the alien symbiote Venom."
Boomstick: Life was ultimately spectacular and amazing for the most popular Marvel superhero, Spider-Man!... ...I mean, he saved the city, fell in love, got married, saved the city some more, maybe too much, got his marriage testy, made some dicey money choices - how did a Spider-Man themed restaurant fail - 15 years pass, blah blah blah, broke his back, got smacked in the face by a drone, buried Aunt May, split up with MJ because he's not ready for children, and lives alone in an apartment. Yep, totally amazing..."
Wiz: "This is Peter B. Parker, one version of the infinite Peter Parkers as Spider-Man in the Spider-Verse. This one in particular was as well adjusted as Boomstick."
Boomstick: "Hey! This bum lost EVERYone he loved! At least I still have you, man!"
Wiz: "Oh. Uh, I-I'm sorry I offended you. I didn't know I meant that much to you."
Boomstick: "Eh, don't sweat it."
Wiz: "Ahem. Yes, he indeed lost everything but his title as Spider-Man. Unfortunately, that includes most of his own inventions, so no Spidey-Glider, no EMP bombs, and especially no Iron Man hand-me-downs. All he has is his signature Web Shooters. He can swing across buildings just as easily here as you always wanted to when you were a kid. Being 2.5 times as tough as steel, it can easily hold back helicopters, the Daily Bugle, even Iron Man suits."
Boomstick: "How the hell could a teenager just create these to begin with? Well, he's actually a supergenius. His test scores can match that of a young Reed Richards, who, speaking of whom, Peter assisted with on making a ship 3 billion years in the future! He can bring those smarts into the fight, finding out the weaknesses to his enemies fairly quickly and exploiting them. Even hacking into a Tri-Sentinel in a few seconds."
Wiz: "Peter B. himself has shown to memorize a password from a fair distance away in a reflection, and replicated the goober for the Super Collider. Not to mention the 23 years of fighting crime as Spider-Man. Reed Richards even once commented that if Spider-Man had devoted his life to science, he would have rivaled his own intellect."
Boomstick: "Still, his broke ass was fucking miserable living alone, all because he couldn't handle being a father. That is, until some weird portal transports him and other Spider-Man variants into some other dimension because of Kingpin's Super Collider. There, he would meet Miles, a teen burdened with a radioactive spider from another another dimension, who was promised to be trained under his universe's Spider-Man, who was literally perfect. He was also dead by the time Peter B. showed up."
Wiz: "He was reluctant to show this spider teen the ropes, but he'd soon learn to get along with Miles. In their adventure, Peter B. really does show him what it means to be Spider-Man. That includes controlling his many abilities, such as wall-crawling. He can stick to trains, missiles, and even rockets without the wind blowing him off. It's practically impossible to rip him off by force unless the surface breaks from strain."
Boomstick: "Knocking him off a surface is hard enough, but knocking him down is even harder with his perfect equilibrium. Whenever he falls to the floor from a punch, he regains his balance with little issues, allowing him to perform incredibly complex acrobatics with complete ease. And that's without his iconic Spider Sense, which, oh boy, is it a doozy."
Wiz: "The Spider Sense is a Spider-Man's most reliable arsenal, able to alert Peter of incoming danger, down to his own instinct. After so many years of having it, he's been able to run through all possibilities in a battle WHILE HE IS FIGHTING. Not to mention it can detect beings that are invisible to the human eye, such as Doctor Strange's Astral Form, and dodge attacks from he himself couldn't see or smell."
Boomstick: "However, you can't be a superhero without super strength and reflexes. Now, some might say this Peter B. is a drastically different from the original comic version, but he is in fact the OG CB Spider-Man, as his dimension is Earth-616, the very first dimension we are introduced in the Marvel multiverse. So, his is the original Spider-Man, created by Stan Lee himself. And he should be comparable to other Spider-Peters, too, like Tobey Maguire, Andrew Garfield, Tom Holland, Insomniac, and even the one from Miles' dimension!"
Wiz: "This version of Peter Parker instantly halted the gears of the Super Collider with one exhausted hand. Looking at how many gears he stopped spinning, knowing full well none of them are hollow, he would be holding back over 6 BILLION Newtons of force (6,288,281,639.2 Newtons). That's more than enough to lift the entirety of the Daily Bugle building, which is nearly 600,000 tons. Spider-Man also held said building. I mean, other Spider-Men have broke through eachother's webs, from clumps of the stuff to a single strain."
Boomstick: "HA! That's cute compared to his speed. He's pretty comparable to Spider-Gwen, who saves her father from a bullet at Mach 1.335, or when Peter B. and the other Spider-People were launched out of the Super Collider at speeds 5 times the speed of sound, she could catch a pole in time. Spider-Men have dodged way faster things in the comics, like the infamous Lightmaster. Ooooooooh!"
Wiz: "Peter himself has stated his blasts are, well, lightspeed. And he's dodged his blasts numerous times before, as well have others comparable dodged lightspeed attacks. He's similar in reaction speed to Daredevil in particular, who can perceive a nanosecond pause and even throw his Billy Club between that pause. To do this, he'd had to react to speeds over 6 times the speed of light."
Boomstick: "And that's not including when he has to use Spider-Sense. But despite how broken his reactions are, he can't keep dodging forever. Other Peter Parkers have survived the Super Collider exploding, half a mountain crushing him, and an electromagnetic wave strong enough to destroy a city. That's 10 Megatons!"
Wiz: "That's casual for Spider-Men. How about tanking the zap of a scepter emitting one Exajoule? It's a bit of a leap for him, but that's 239 Megatons of TNT! Enough to destroy a mountain, and he was back up a minute later. He's taken hits from fellow superheroes like Collective Man, Nova, and Captain Marvel, who could shatter meteors. It's hard to think a Spider-Man can be in their league, but that's just it. No matter how many times you knock him down, Spider-Man gets back up, even when he SHOULDN'T. Like when Kingpin crushes Miles the same way he killed his dimension's original Spider-Man."
Boomstick: "Or, one time, after a fun in with Doctor Octopus in his submarine lair, Peter is left trapped under an inhuman amount of metal and rubble while water slowly flowed into the base. He struggled and struggled, but the weight was too much, and for just a moment, he was going to give up. But this idea was swept off the table when he was forced to remember what he was actually fighting for. To save his Aunt May and to live up to Uncle Ben's memory. With this despite the unimaginable pain, Peter kept going and managed to push passed his limits. Completely lifting the rubble off himself allowing him to escape. What the fuck?"
Wiz: "His will alone has become a superpower, one practically indomitable. It can even fight through telepathic and emotionally manipulative attacks. This will pushes Peter to his limits, leaving him extremely exhausted, or worse, in mortal danger. Peter B. was even willing to leave himself in this dimension to shut down the Super Collider, even when he knows he'll cease to exist if he stays in the wrong dimension too long."
Boomstick: "Because what is Spider-Man without a leap of faith? That was the last lesson he taught Miles before leaving him behind. I mean, he RECENTLY lost his uncle Prowler, he's not in the best healthy state. But through working out some father issues, he joins back into the fray and makes Peter proud. Proud enough to want kids!"
Wiz: "Knowing he has taught Miles well, he returns back to his home dimension and mustered up the courage to get back with MJ again. And in one year's time, he has a child of his own, Mayday. And he gave her little Web Swingers of her own - isn't it cute? But you know what's funny? In all the 60 years of Earth-616 Peter Parker in the comics, he never obtained fatherhood once."
Boomstick: "That's not funny, that's depressing. It's how Paul got created to spice up Peter and MJ's relationship, when all we fans ask for is Spider-Children. Like, why do we need to look into other dimensions for Spider-Man to have a happy life as a father instead of having it in canon? Why do we need a deadbeat boyfriend to tangle the relationship? Why is Superior Spider-Man being reborn as a teenage girl!? YES! THAT IS REAL!!"
Wiz: "Jesus, okay! Yeah, Peter B. got off easy reuniting with MJ and becoming a father, with no Paul bullshit in sight. He has had basically everything thrown at him during his life, every sort of pain that a human could face, physically and emotionally, and yet he doesn't give up. Sometimes, it did get a little hard on him, but Peter does get back up. With people like him, it's no wonder there was a Spider Society created to protect the Multiverse. He even joined them and got a dimension traveling watch."
Boomstick: "'You are the best of us. Spider-Man is a legacy. An Inspiration. Yes, the righteous path can be a burden. But picture a world without the Hope you represent?' Best way to describe one of the most popular superheroes I can think of. For generations in his world and ours, he's proven to be the ultimate, spectacular, amazing Spider-Man."
Robert Parr[]
Wiz: "1947 was the golden age of superheroes. In fact, there were so many supers, the National Supers Agency needed to be form to keep track of them. Fantastic heroes like Gazerbeam, Fironic, and more would use their superpowers for the greater good, protecting the innocent and everything else you can guess superheroes do."
Boomstick: "But the greatest and most dangerous Super in this agency is Mr. Incredible. This is a man who can bench press an ALCO locomotive, which can weigh 153 tons, and won an eating contest with Thunderhead, eating 47 boysenberry pies, 8 banana creams, 3 apple-crumbs and a liter of mayo! That sounded cooler in my head."
Wiz: "There was nothing more Mr. Incredible loved doing more than helping, be it taking cats off trees or stopping robbers. He's been acclaimed as one of the greats of his time. Although, he does get too much of a good thing."
Boomstick: (imitating Mr. Incredible) "I feel like the maid. I just cleaned up this mess, could you keep it clean for ten minutes!?"
Wiz: "With the constant stream of crime, Mr. Incredible admittedly wanted to settle down, away from his obsessive fans, like this boy, Buddy. He was really dead-set on being his sidekick, Incrediboy, with him inventing rocket shoes to keep up, something I would be proud in a descendant."
Boomstick: "Oh, fly home, Buddy. He works alone, except for his pal, Samuel Jacks- oh, I mean, Frozone. Heck, he's even having a little marriage with the aggressive go-getter, Elastigirl, who didn't want to settle down before. Really, did she want leaving saving the world to the men? I think NOT!! ...Did I mention this movie was very quotable?"
Wiz: "But let's just say Incredible gets more than he bargained for. Soon after his wedding, Mr. Incredible fights his greatest battle; the legal system. He saves someone from committing suicide, but he sues him for ruining his death, which, fun fact, the law allowing you to do that was passed in 1975, not back in 1947. On top of that, a whole train of people with broken bones sued him. This later affected every other super to the point where they are banned. In hindsight, if we were to count how much money in property damage superheroes have costed, this would've been the only outcome."
Boomstick: "Well, it's bad luck seeing the bride before the ceremony. And through those 15 years of being a father, Bob began having a mid-life crisis. Sure, he has his valuable wife, his shy and invisible daughter Violet, his speedy son Dash, and seemingly normal baby Jack-Jack, but the job he's stuck with actively hinders people's lives rather than helping them like they're supposed to. The absolute worst job a superhero could ever have picked. Though, considering his track record, there wasn't much options left."
Wiz: "This left a desire for his glory days, to fight crime and actually help people, as helping his super family isn't enough, at least not anymore. He's even out hero-ing behind their back with his pal Frozone, despite his reluctance. But he would be given an opportunity to finally be a real superhero again from a mysterious figure named Mirage."
Boomstick: "And this was offered just when Bob lost his job. To be fair, we do need more people punching their CEOs nowadays. He gladly accepted the job, which involved him fighting a giant robot! This runaway Omnidroid was pushing his powers to the limits, predicting his movements, cutting through his old suit, and trying to crush him like an Indiana Jones boulder. But even at his age, his superpowers never rusted."
Wiz: "His most iconic power is his superhuman strength. Even in this fight, he sends the Omnidroid flying with a single punch and rip apart it's arms with ease. He's also threw his former boss through 4 sheets of walls, stopped a train's momentum in 10 seconds, exercise with lifting train cars, leaped from building to building, and bended a ship's fin while underwater. And he's probably even stronger than that. According to the NSA, he's been rated a threat level at 9.1, the highest level of any super."
Boomstick: "That includes Hypershock, only threat level 7.5, who's power can create seismic earthquakes, with a maximum of a Magnitude 6 on the Richter scale. That's nearly 300 Megatons of TNT (294,719,168.26 tons of TNT), about 5 times the power of the Tsar Bomb, the most destructive bomb to exist! Wait, I thought it was 15 Kilotons, only enough to level an entire town."
Wiz: "That's for RADIATED waves. The NSA describes his powers as SEISMIC, which, as you can see, is far more powerful."
Boomstick: "Jeez, I knew these supers were too powerful for the government, but it makes even more sense Mr. Incredible is the one to make supers illegal, because if he's really more powerful than Hypershock, there would be so much more property damage than we see in the movie. And clearly, the Omnidroid was no match for his strength."
Wiz: "No, Boomstick, far from it. The Omnidroid's AI was designed to solve any problem it's confronted with, to the point where it was smart enough to question why it was taking orders. This made it difficult for Mr. Incredible to beat it, as it kept countering a lot of his options, let alone this was his first time back hero-ing."
Boomstick: "Yet, he still outsmarts it by literally letting it hit itself. Yeah, he's no musclehead, he can come up with an effective strategy in the middle of a fight. This is further evident when you realize the Omnidroid faced off against his other super friends, who can tend to super geniuses."
Wiz: "This was when the true mastermind behind these Omnidroids shows his face to his biggest fan - Syndrome. The same toxic fan Bob had to knock sense into is now luring all the supers to kill them, one by one. Something tipped off when Mirage first found him, as the initial target was Frozone."
Boomstick: "Wow, this movie is a lot smarter than I imagined. That being said, he discovered Syndrome's plan to literally play hero and was captured, with no hope of anyone saving him. No one except his family. Yeah, Elastigirl figures out the little job her husband was lured into, and she comes in to rescue him. Oh, and Dash and Violet stowed away on her plane."
Wiz: "Unfortunately, Syndrome shot them down with 3 short-range missiles. Their supposed deaths broke Mr. Incredible, leading him to try to kill Mirage to give Syndrome the same pain, crushing her like breaking a toothpick. But a hero such as himself just couldn't. He never knew how important his family was to him until they were gone."
Boomstick: "Relax, they survived. On this mission, they were allowed to actually use their superpowers to rescue their dad, and eventually, succeed. A truly freeing feeling. And their superpowers are impressive - Violet able to turn invisible and create impenetrable forcefields, and Dash able to run on water, and under hallucinations, processed entire days in less than a second."
Wiz: "Even processing one day within a second makes Dash nearly 10 billion times faster than a normal human, and regular humans like the babysitter they hired to take care of Jack-Jack could react to his laser eyes, even while sleep deprived. Hell, even a simple raccoon could dodge these lasers. Violet and Helen have in fact tagged Dash's super speed, and Helen specifically had the highest agility in the NSA files, so a little bit of her rubbed off on the 10 year old speedster."
We cut to Wiz and Boomstick in the lab. Boomstick appears in a red outfit similar to Mr. Incredible's, and a yellow cape flowing behind.
Boomstick: "Oh, but how did they survive, you might ask? Well, Elastigirl shielded her kids with her super suit, the same one made for Mr. Incredible by their eccentric designer, Edna Mode. Show them, Wiz!"
Wiz: "She designed these suits to be compatible with their powers (as he stretches the suit, and lets go of it), completely bulletproof (pulls out a machine gun and sprays bullets across BS's torso), withstand temperatures of over one thousand degrees (throws away the gun and pulls out a flamethrower, blasting it on BS's crotch, throws it away when done), and machine washable. New feature."
Boomstick: "With this suit, Elastigirl protected her kids from the plane destroying explosions. Since they were short ranged missiles, each of them would have an explosive radius of over one kilometer, or simply 54 Kilotons. Man, the only thing that would make this suit cooler was if it had a cape, which I added."
Wiz: "Funny. You seem to quote the movie constantly, but you seem to not remember the most famous one."
Boomstick: "Uh... Where's my Super suit!?"
A big vacuum cleaner comes from behind Boomstick, as Wiz pulls out a button.
Wiz: "Close. I was thinking - NO CAPES!!"
Wiz presses the button, and the vacuum sucks in Boomstick's cape. The quick force yanks Boomstick back and tips the whole machine over, making a loud crash drowning out his screams of agony. Wiz laughs his hair off looking at Boomstick's misery.
Boomstick: "Another tool Mr. Incredible has used is his Incredibile, because superheroes really loved their brand cars back then. It has voice recognition and commands, other options for mobility, such as hovering and hydro, can drive on it's own, can switch to stealth, which sounds like invisibility, and my personal favorite, fire missiles. Oh, baby, it has it all. Sure he lost it all those years, but somehow it ended up at a private auction. And thanks to his remote, he could bring it back home."
Wiz: "With the superhero family reunited, they head back home to stop the Omnidroid from destroying the city, with the trip taking the same way the Omnidroid got there in the first place - through a rocket ship. And both trips in the film took about a minute each, which is impressive considering what Syndrome's computer blueprint suggests. Now, this blueprint isn't super reliable, but it does offer the height the rocket reaches - over 13 hundred miles, to be exact."
Boomstick: "And neither the Incredibles nor the Omnidroid had the most graceful landings. It was a battle for the ages against this beast, it's arms rolling body and plasma blaster doing real damage, all while each family member - and Frozone who FOUND HIS SUPER SUIT - trying to keep the key to stopping it in their grasp, Syndrome's remote. Mr. Incredible took plenty of beatings from this thing, including it's crushing blows of it's 2 million ton body, which he lifted, a crush force of 8 Kilotons."
Wiz: "This particular blow was about to crush his two kids, with it already tiring Violet out. Sure, you could say he'd easily have held it on his own, but given the context of the situation, it's actually a case of Hysterical Strength, a display of physicality beyond what's humanly normal in life-or-death situations, especially for parental figures protecting their children.
Boomstick: "Kinda like my mama Boomstick when a teacher gave me an unfair punishment. Moments before she tore the entire school with her bare hands... Anyway, even with all that family protecting strength, none of the Incredibles could lay a dent on the Omnidroid, not even tanks either, and it had more than enough to overwhelm them with it's plasma gun and it's arms, which are strong enough to penetrate itself!"
Wiz: "As a matter of fact, this was their one shot. They had Mr. Incredible hold back one of the Omnidroid's rocketing claw, waiting for a clean blow. Then, BAM! He lands the shot perfectly, defeating the machine and saving the city, much to Syndrome's annoyance. Just when things were looking up for the family, Syndrome attempts to steal their baby Jack-Jack, and though he fails and dies like any superhero with a cape, his falling plane left the family homeless."
Boomstick: "Wow, that was wicked. And yet, the world continues to beat down on him and his family. After failing to apprehend the Underminer, the government saw their opportunity to shut down the Super Relocation Program, leaving his dear friend Rick Dicker out of a job - or, retired, cuz he immediately goes on vacation - and the Incredibles out to dry.
Wiz: "But hope was not lost, for a billionaire named Winston Deaver would summon Mr. Incredible, Elastigirl, and Frozone to make supers legal again. Of course, we have to remind you this story about the 1% helping the less fortunate is a work of fiction. He would show the world what a superhero sees in saving the day through cameras in the suit his sister, Evelyn, giving the people a better perception of supers than the government would allow for their own benefits."
Boomstick: "Unfortunately for Mr. Incredible, they went with his wife instead, and honestly, he of all supers should know why they were illegal in the first place. However, she was reluctant at first with the kids being her first priority, but knowing they'll never get a chance like this again, Bob promises to take great care of them. Sure, parenting wasn't easy, and he really thought it was wise to hide Jack-Jack's new 14 powers from Helen, but he manages."
Wiz: "He certainly struggled with learning the new mathematics to teach his son, and Violet's complicated boy problem took a lot out of him, but he truly does care. Behind the big ego of being the most famous hero lies a compassionate soul using his powers for the good of the world, only wanting to help. With his true greatest adventure now realized, there's nobody else he wants to help more than his family."
Boomstick: "Little by little, and thwarting another regular rich human's plan for ruining supers, the Incredibles did manage to make supers legal again. With a new age for the family, I'm sure life will be nothing short of incredible... to an uncanny degree- I'M SORRY WIZ I HAD TO SAY IT!"
Fight[]
We open a comic book as we zoom in on a panel. Keep in mind, the fight will have more heavy comic book influence. On a bright, colourful day, the Incredibile speeds by the city enjoying the scenic route of the forest. Inside the vehicle, Mr. Incredible was singing his theme song, while Jack-Jack clapped along in the backseat.
Mr. Incredible: "Incredible, Incredible, Incredible. Punching the bad guys- Pow! Pow! PO-whoOOOAAA!"
Suddenly, a big hexagonal portal flashes out, freaking out Mr. Incredible and spins out the Incredibile. It could safely stop sideways against where the portal was facing. Out of the portal comes a red and blue schemed superhero, one hand behind his back, with a pink pouch for a baby with red hair.
Spider-Man: "Hello, I'm Spider-Man. Are you - (looks at his watch) - Mr. Incredible?"
He gets out of his car. To clarify, he is in his casual wear, white button shirt, black belt, brown pants.
Mr. Incredible: "Um, no? I'm Bob Parr."
Spider-Man: "Oh, so is this NOT your son?"
Peter pulls out Jack-Jack in his hand from behind his back. Bob's jaw dropped as he gives a double take at the 'empty' baby seat in the car, but to surprise him more, Jack-Jack is in fact ALSO in the car. He goes back and forth looking back at the Jack-Jacks. He sighs realizing another tow of Jack-Jack powers caused this mess.
Spider-Man: "Your baby was found in another dimension full of monsters, scaring them with his powers so bad they had to blow up the restaurant he was in. Last thing the Spider-Verse needs is such chaotic powers in a baby, which is where I come in.
Mr. Incredible: "And you thought it was wise to bring your own baby along?"
Spider-Man looks down at his daughter in her pooch, taking off her stitched mask to give a funny face.
Spider-Man: "I'm just going to take him away before Miguel does."
He thwips out a web straight for the Jack-Jack in the Incredibile, but Mr. Incredible catches it with is gloved hand. He uses his other hand to rip his shirt off to reveal his superhero outfit (just include the pants and shoes), adding on his mask to his face as well. He may not know who this Miguel is, but he's not letting his baby be taken away from him.
Mr. Incredible: "Then you'll see why they call me Mr. InCREDible!"
Mr. Incredible pulls back on the web during his one-liner and brings Spider-Man closer, ready to deliver an uppercut.
FIGHT!
Mr. Incredible punches Spider-Man square in the gut, the impact launching him over the trees. Getting a hold of himself, Peter pulls back on his web, carrying Mr. Incredible up into the air while he still had his grip on the web. Once, close enough, Spider-Man delivers a dropkick on Mr. Incredible, knocking him into several trees which break from the impact. He then shoots two webs to the trees and slingshots himself towards the fallen super.
Meanwhile, Mayday slides onto the Incredible on her bum, while Jack-Jack lands straight onto the pavement, but don't worry, his skin was changed to metal and the impact made a hole in the pavement instead.
Landing on a rock and cracking it, Mr. Incredible shook off the daze and quickly dodge the incoming Spider-Man. The impact launched the two pieces of the rock and Mr. Incredible, who takes the opportunity to throw a rock piece at Spider-Man. With squiggly lines representing his Spider-Sense, Peter stands completely still and smacked the rock back into Bob's face. A web string attaches to Mr. Incredible's gut and he's pulled in closer to Spider-Man's walloping.
Spider-Man: "Well, I can tell you're incredibly DENSE!!"
He lands his Crawler Assault on him, all eight blows, and sends him flying into a tree, breaking it. Spider-Man quickly conjures a ball of web and throws it to the father superhero, who attempts to catch it, but ends up entangled along with the tree and his fist to his face. He then web swings to the sky and swings on the web to deliver a kick to Mr. Incredible. While threatened, he did realize the tree was broken, so he quickly bends down and slams the tree on Peter.
Lifting up the tree, Mr. Incredible sees the impact left quite the crater for our spider friend, with his outfit having a big tear in the torso. Mr. Incredible breaks through the web and quickly grabs the whole tree like a baseball bat. Spider-Man lifts his body up, completely dazed and .
Mr. Incredible: "Well, with great density comes great FORCE!!"
Mr. Incredible swings the tree right into Spider-Man's face, seemingly ending the arachnid superhero a little early in the fight, even with his Spider-Sense tingling. However, as the tree swings by, Spidey was gone an there was no impact sound. This confuses Robert, but he quickly put together he easily jumped over the tree. He looks up and is proven right with Spider-Man drops a foot dive on his face. As Mr. Incredible drops the tree, Spidey grabs it and plans to shove it into his face.
Spider-Man: "True, but you got to account for ACCELERATION!!!"
Spider-Man thrusts the tree into Mr. Incredible's face, making a big KABLAM! effect and sends him flying - not to mention leaving a face print on the tree. While airborne, Mr. Incredible breaks through several panel borders before crashing into a building rooftop. The hexagonal portal appears again with Peter B. coming out.
Spider-Man: "Had enough yet?"
Mr. Incredible immediately got back up like nothing happened, even though his face is full of splinters.
Mr. Incredible: "What do you think?"
He flicks one of the splinters off his cheek, and the shockwave through his face causes the rest of the splinters to fly off. Spider-Man shrugs and leans back into the portal as it disappears. Mr. Incredible puts his guard up, looking around for where Peter will show up. Then, he hears a faint sound from above, knowing beforehand Spider-Man is trying to slam his elbow right on his head. With that in mind, he quickly catches Spider-Man and slams him down. Mr. Incredible smashes Spider-Man's head onto the pavement.
Mr. Incredible: "Apparently, you thought that would work on me."
Spider-Man: (half-muffled) "Not in the way you expected..."
With that remark, Mr. Incredible finally notices the web string from Peter's arm, but a little too late as the arm pulls back and the Incredibile comes out of the portal. Falling rapidly, Mr. Incredible barely catches it in time, the impact cratering the entire roof with a loud CSSSH!. Peter was not banking on Bob catching it in time - nor was he expecting both Jack-Jack and Mayday to be in the car, which had him really worried.
While Spider-Man types in coordinates into his watch, Mr. Incredible shifts the car in his grasp to give the Friendly Neighborhood hero the same thrust he gave him with a tree. Just as the portal opens, he realizes too late of Mr. Incredible's next move.
Spider-Man: "Wait, there's babies on board!"
SLAM! Spider-Man was crushed into the portal by the Incredibile. However, Mr. Incredible hears the last words and was confused.
Mr. Incredible: "Wait, what?"
Suddenly, a portal comes from behind and Spider-Man slams into Mr. Incredible right off the building. The Incredibile flips up into the air from the speed and lands on it's tires. Through the windshield, we see Jack-Jack splattered across it, but not like guts and blood, his body was turned into rubber and spread across, which protected him and Mayday from the impact. As Jack-Jack reverts back to normal, the babies both giggle like nothing happened.
While falling together, Spider-Man takes advantage and catapults off of Mr. Incredible to land safely and stick on the windows of the building. Mr. Incredible, however does the same to the other building close to him and slams through the window. The shockwave was so great, it cracked all the windows from top to bottom, especially the one Spider-Man was standing on. Once he fell into place, Mr. Incredible leaps out of the building and grabs a hold of him.
Spider-Man retaliates with several web strings launching out of his Web Slingers, attaching to the shattered building. By the time they both even touch the other building, they stop all momentum, giving Mr. Incredible a brief moment of disbelief. Such disbelief was replaced with fear as they both slingshot across the city at blazing speeds, slamming into several other buildings in the process.
After every crash into a building, we see Spider-Man and Mr. Incredible exchange blows, with each crash changing who has the upper hand. First crash, Spider-Man holds Mr. Incredible in front as the crash into the next building. Afterwards, Mr. Incredible has Spider-Man in a chokehold. Each transition between crashes changes how they're hurting eachother until they land on a highway.
Skidding across the concrete, the two superheroes had to continue their strife at the whim of traffic. Spider-Man quickly got up and back to duke it out, but the over abundance of traffic keeps catching him on guard. Consider him lucky, cuz Mr. Incredible was taking too long getting up that a cement truck drives into him and flips over, causing a major crash on the other side of the highway.
With hardly any cars in his way now, aside from a car transport, Spider-Man thwips his webs onto Mr. Incredible and spin him around in the air. While giving himself a yawn, he throws Mr. Incredible straight at the car transport, the whiplash causing it to slowly spin out.
Spider-Man: "You know, I'll admit it's taking a while to tire you out."
He attempts to web swing across, but a car aggressively slams into him, causing him to be knocked back. The impact left half of his mask ripped off.
Mr. Incredible: "I can tell you that pun did take away a little of my adrenaline."
Mr. Incredible continues to throw cars straight at Peter, who is narrowly dodging most of the obstacles. Sure, he gets hit by one, but Spider-Man manages to bounce off it and swing across to deck Mr. Incredible. He, however, blocked the attack by shielding himself with a car he was about to throw.
He had a creative idea, bending the entire car to crush Spider-Man in between, but the plan was a little slow to work. Not because it was actually slow - rather the Spider Sense slowed down time for visual effect, alerting Spider-Man ahead of time, giving him the chance to jump out in time. He shoots out webs and slingshots through the car, slamming Mr. Incredible through the transport car and cratering the concrete road.
Mr. Incredible: "You know, if we're going to hit the road, I'm calling my ride."
He pulls out a remote and presses the button with the house and magnifying glass symbol. Meanwhile, the Incredibile gets the signal and drives down the building (the building itself is a parking lot building), and slams out of the walls and speed on the highway, with the parents' babies still inside.
We cut back to our two heroes, hand in hand, as they try to push eachother away. But all of that is interrupted as the Incredibile jets in smashes them off their feet. They feel the tremendous force of the wind blowing in their faces. Spider-Man was able to fight back against the acceleration and elbow smashes Mr. Incredible's stomach. He spins around in an attempt to spin kick Mr. Incredible off the moving vehicle, but he catches it in time. With Spider-Man in his grasp, Mr. Incredible throws him off of the Incredibile, though not fully, as he managed to thwip his web onto the back of the car like he's on a jet ski. He even rides on a stop sign like a surfboard.
Spider-Man: "Bummer, dude. You can't wipe me out that easily. I'm just going to hang ten on my stick here."
Mr. Incredible: "You can stop ruining my future summer vacations now, please."
Climbing over the car to get a view, Mr. Incredible decides to press a button, and the Incredibile's turbines turn around to point straight for Spider-Man, firing up missiles. However, Spider-Man manages to kick both missiles, which causes one of them to pop the Incredibile up into the air. Unfortunately, the other one destroys a part of a train bridge.
After the Incredibile crashes on him, Mr. Incredible lifts up the vehicle, and, in total shock, notices the broken bridge, giving him war flashbacks. Spider-Man, landing on his feet, also realizes his mistake in disbelief. The two superhero dads are given more fear when a train comes riding in, pumping the brakes a little too late. Knowing to do the right thing, they both put their squabble aside to save lives.
Spider-Man swings right to the train and tries holding it back, recreating Sam Raimi's Spider-Man 2's train scene. He sprays a bunch of webs to stop the train, but it doesn't slow it down all the way. Mr. Incredible jumps onto the railway and prepares to halt the train to a standstill. Both Spider-Man and Mr. Incredible brace for the impact, knowing this is gonna hurt. With a great KAPOW!, the scene cuts to black.
In the darkness, we hear the faint voice of Miguel O'hare, probably through Peter's DTW. "Peter...", says Miguel. "Where are you?" "You must capture the baby." "Lethal aggression is authorized."
When Mr. Incredible came to, he realizes he's stuck to a giant web in the middle of a city. He tries to break free, but to little avail. All his struggles amount to is rippling the entire web. Looking around, he notices the train he tried to stop did indeed stop, with the people coming out with little injuries. This give Mr. Incredible a sigh of relief, knowing that the past has not been repeated.
Spider-Man: "Comfortable?"
Jolting at the familiarly annoying remark, Mr. Incredible remembers his opponent at hand. Spider-Man was across the road, with two web strings attached to the web.
Spider-Man: "Thanks for helping with that train. And for what it's worth, this did not have to end like this. *sigh* But Miguel found out. I'm sorry"
Spider-Man prepares to launch himself straight for Mr. Incredible, finishing him off the same way to another superhero. However, Mr. Incredible finds the bondage to becoming loose. While he can't break free of how stick it is, the walls the web is attached to are beginning to crack. He wraps his arm around the web, while Spider-Man finally launches himself straight for Mr. Incredible.
Just as Spider-Man was about to dropkick Bob right in the chest, the wall piece attached to the web rips off, allowing Mr. Incredible to match the blow and send a humongous shockwave that knocks Peter back (or maybe he just jumped off in time to avoid serious damage thanks to the Spider Sense). A building fragment catches the attention of the Spider Sense, so Spider-Man easily reformulate a plan by catching the fragment and using the momentum to spring right back into Mr. Incredible like a paddle ball.
Seeing this backup plan in action, Mr. Incredible quickly pulls out his Incredibile remote and presses a button. The vehicle lights up and launches 2 missiles straight for the web. One hits Spider-Man, shattering the fragment, throwing him off-course and tearing off the back of his suit in the process (you could say he had a backshot). The second one tears apart the entirety of the web's left side in a fiery explosion.
Swinging across the city block on what's left of the webs on the right side, Mr. Incredible lands on top of the Incredibile. Just as Spider-Man almost falls on his face, he quickly picked himself up, flipping and landing on his feet. They stare down eachother, awaiting their next move.
Mr. Incredible: "Now, kids, I hope you fasten your seatbelts."
In the car, Jack-Jack and Mayday hear that, and they do as they were told and fasten their seatbelts.
Mr. Incredible: "Incredibile, CHARGE!!"
The Incredibile jets forwards straight for Spider-Man, who remains standing still. All he does is press buttons on his dimensional watch. This activates a portal right behind him
Spider-Man: "I think you'll need to put things into perspective."
Just as the Incredibile rushes into the portal, Spider-Man backflips into the portal ahead of time. They enter the Spider-Verse, with Mr. Incredible attempting to leap over and tackle him, only to be interrupted by the glitching throughout his body. being in awe by the multiverse. Spider-Man leans back a safe distance away to let the him take in the beauty.
Spider-Man: "This is the multiverse your son poses a threat to. Not a major threat, but a threat nonetheless."
Mr. Incredible: "Even if he is that dangerous, he's still my son, my responsibility."
Spider-Man: "I understand the parental instincts. But can you handle the great power that comes with him?"
Mr. Incredible begins to doubt himself now witnessing the bigger picture here. The whole scene around Mr. Incredible fades to black as silence voids the panel. But then, a striking panel rushes onto the screen
Mr. Incredible: "I'll need to, no matter what happens. Can you?"
Spider-Man: "Think it's finally time to find out."
Spider-Man thwips his web onto the Incredibile to launch himself towards Mr. Incredible - who does the same jumping off of the hood. They clash in a fury of punches, each blow staggering their bodies. They grab hold of eachother's hands in a tug of war, with Mr. Incredible glitching out which is causing him to lose. This confounds Mr. Incredible, especially when he doesn't see Spider-Man suffering from the same condition.
Mr. Incredible (Thought bubble): "How is he not suffering this instability I have?"
However, he looks over to his dimensional watch and started to connect the dots. Clearly, the device that could travel through dimensions is keeping Spider-Man stable compared to him. Bob knew what he had to do. He lifts Spider-Man's arms up and headbutts him square in the noggin. While knocking him back, he grabs a hold of the device and yanks it off his arm.
Mr. Incredible: "Let's even the playing field, shall we?"
The dimensional watch flies out into the Spider-Verse, with Peter frantically trying to grasp it. Even after getting past Mr. Incredible, he fails to retrieve it, due to the glitching affecting him now. Mr. Incredible attacks Spider-Man with a bearhug, and the kinetic energy leads them into other dimensions.
They land in a red forest, where the trees are red and the ocean is boiling, clarified when Mr. Incredible lands on his back in said ocean and it sizzle his suit and skin causing him to scream out in pain and jump out as quickly as possible. Spider-Man lands on said trees and skids all the way down it's trunk, getting rope burns on his d***.
Getting back to fighting eachother, both Mr. Incredible and Spider-Man take advantage of their environment. Mr. Incredible grabs a handful of boiling water and splashes it on Spider-Man's face, causing him immense agony and melt the rest of his mask off. But even when blind, he still rips the tree out of it's roots and batters up slamming it right into Mr. Incredible's face.
They try to continue fight, but something in the background interrupts them. In the background, a giant being of psychic energy shakes the ground trying to swat a purple magical titan, who unleashes a ball of pure light and blasting it at the giant. The blast reaches our current combatants, vaporizing the ground between them and making the ground they are on to fall. Just as they clash with eachother, they glitch out of this dimension.
They enter another dimension, landing on top of a mountain. Spider-Man decides to take in the scenery - so colorful, so full of personality - though he thought it was weird the mountains looked like centaurs, including the one they were on. But the scenic enjoyment would last as the mountain starts falling apart.
Apparently, some blue teenage girl with cosmic forces was shooting a bunch of tennis cat laser beams at the mountain, causing both superheroes to slide down the avalanche of rubble, with a pony that looks like two beach balls had a weird kid. One giant block of rubble was about to crush her, alerting Spider-Man. In less than a second, he kick Mr. Incredible hard enough to launch him through the block and pulverizing it. He also hit hard enough to slam through a couple of more blocks before being stuck in the last one. With an opening so clear you can see right through it, Spider-Man thwips himself to drop kick Mr. Incredible, which is about when they both glitch out of the dimension again.
This time, they enter an asteroid belt, with Spider-Man's dropkick on Mr. Incredible changing the momentum of one meteor. With Mr. Incredible at his feet, Spider-Man attempts to finish the job with a double hammer fist.
But then, the clash between a literal flaming (pussy)cat and an orange alien with vibrant red hair and green aura send heavy amount of heat throughout the belt, and blasting several meteors away or incinerating them, including the one they're on with it suffering the ladder treatment. With the blast knocking them away, they both spin out of control at blazing speeds. Mr. Incredible takes advantage of this momentum and delivers his own double hammer fist onto Spider-Man in a twist of irony. The blow itself glitching them out of this dimension.
They transport right back to the Spider-Verse, with the knockback landing Spider-Man, now with only the arms and pants of his suit remaining, right on the Incredibile. He hears the squabbling of children, and looks inside the car, seeing Jack-Jack and Mayday fighting for the dimensional watch. He finds it cute at their fighting, and sad that it's for survival.
Spider-Man looks back at Mr. Incredible, knowing when this battle ends, the winner hast to take care of the other's kid.
Spider-Man: "Hey, Mr. Incredible! Let's end this once and for all!"
Mr. Incredible: "With pleasure."
Spider-Man thwips out a web string to yoink himself closer to Mr. Incredible, preparing to punch him. Mr. Incredible readies a punch as well, as the closer they get, the louder they yell. In that time, they glitch out quite a bit up until they clash.
PTZZZZZSSSS!!
The blows cause them to glitch out more frequently, with their shockwave shaking the closest webs of the Spider-Verse. Spider-Man lands his punch on the red giant's face, while Mr. Incredible lands his punch in the Web Crawler's chest. The surging blows have not pierced through their tough skin yet, but one of them begins to glitch less and less significantly.
Mr. Incredible catches glimpse of his family, fearing this will be the last time he'll see them, that pisses him off. He yells in agony while pushing through the glitching as hard as he can, digging his fist further into Spider-Man's chest more and more, practically cracking ribs. Spider-Man begins coughing up blood, but this doesn't stop pushing against Mr. Incredible's face. His eyes light up bright light blue, as if his own spirit is pushing his body to his limits. Thought bubbles surround Peter, all saying "I must win" with each of them growing. "I must win, I MUST win, I MUST WIN!!"
PSSSSHHH!!
...but he couldn't. Mr. Incredible's fist penetrates through Spider-Man's chest, causing Peter to gasp for air. If that wasn't bad enough, the blood blasting out beginning to disappear. In fact, his body begins disintergrating as a whole, his cells no longer able to resist the decay.
Mr. Incredible is horrified by what he's seeing. He thought he'd just knock Peter out, not punch through him and watch him disappear. Tears come to his eyes, as he fails to pull out his arm from the hole, stuck watching another family super die before his eyes. Spider-Man, accepting his fate, puts his hand on Mr. Incredible's shoulder.
Spider-Man: "Please take care of my daughter."
Mr. Incredible: "I- ...I will."
With that, Spider-Man disappears, and the panel fades to white.
As the comic page turns, we look into another panel where the Incredibile returns into the home dimension. Mr. Incredible gets out of the car and opens the side door to tend with his new baby daughter. He tries to fit the dimensional watch onto Mayday, but just when it slips off, it expands and resizes to fight on her arm. Mr. Incredible is a little proud with a tear in his eye, while Jack-Jack duplicates to play with his new sister, playing and giggling together.
However, a portal appears once more behind Mr. Incredible. This time, Miguel O'Hare steps out, blades in hand and mask on. Mr. Incredible turns around with his arms crossed.
Mr. Incredible: "So, you must be Miguel. I hope you're as fearful as Spider-Man made you out to be."
The screen pauses and enters a freeze frame depicting a comic book-style outro titling "THE END..."
Results[]
K.O!
Boomstick: "THAT WAS TOTALLY WICKED!! Alright, I'm done."
Wiz: "This match was not at all what we expected, us included. They had many advantages over eachother, but with what we provided, it would seem like Peter B. Parker had the edge. And in some scenarios, he could.
Boomstick: "Peter was an insane prodigy, with helping Mr. Fantastic build a hyper advanced and being on par in intelligence as said superhero. Mr. Incredible didn't bring much new to the table, not even his improvised strategies that could be on par with his world's supergeniuses, as Spider-Man hasn't stopped being a superhero for 15 years while Bob was forced to. He did train himself back to being, well, incredible, but Spider-Man has gone friendly neighborhood protector to defender of the multiverse. And that's not including his Spider-Sense."
Wiz: "This omnipresent precognition WOULD counter literally any attack from Mr. Incredible. He can in fact go through all the possibilities of this fight while in it after all. Add in his 6.41 times lightspeed reactions, and there's nothing Mr. Incredible can do to even touch Spider-Man to begin with. That is, unless he could match it."
Boomstick: "I know how stupid that sounds, but let's look at his son, Dash. He faced off against Mesmerella, who used her hypnosis on the boy, making him hallucinate multiple fake outcomes that stretch on for days - ALL IN LESS THAN A SECOND. The amount of information you could process in a single day is 74 Gigabytes, and you can process 7 and a half bytes in a single second. That's already enough for a hefty game, but Dash here processed multiple days in less than a second."
Wiz: "To process even one day in such short amount of time, he could react in 30 picoseconds, or over 100 times the speed of light. That would make him over 17 times faster than Daredevil, and Mr. Incredible can scale to his reactions. Both Violet and Elastigirl have tagged Dash while in his speed state, and she herself has the best calculated agility of the supers according to the NSA files, so a lot of those super abilities could have been passed down to Dash. And keep in mind, this speed is counting for one day, not the multiple ones in each hallucination he also processed in less than a second."
Author's Note: While this feat was done in the comics, which is a separate timeline from the films, I already composited 616 Spider-Man with Peter B. Parker with a lot of comic feats, so it's really not that much of a deal.
Boomstick: "This at most would make him faster than even the Spider-Sense, so all that advantage from his trump card, especially countering Mr. Incredible's improvising, meant nothing. Talk about Incredible. But those are for reactions. Spider-Man can swing around at blazing speeds with his webs, out matching Mr. Incredible in travel, right? Well, he has an answer for that too - the Incredibile. This beast of a vehicle can go from city to city in a minute, and with it's other features, it can travel by sea and air."
Wiz: "Of course, speaking of his webs, the Web Shooters and Dimensional Watch were creatively useful options against Mr. Incredible. They are an effective way to toy with him or even the odds, but unfortunately, the webs have a limited amount and their strength are rather inconsistent in terms of strength - one string is enough to entrap the Thing, a planet buster, and yet other Spider-Men from the MAIN source we're pulling from can break a single string easily. Now, Mr. Incredible isn't just dealing with one string, but he's handled other status weapons against him, such as Frozone's ice powers."
Boomstick: "This will need to boil down to their strength. They both have shown to handle exajoules of energy casually, but both of them have been pushed to their limits before. So, which is better, Indomitable Will or Hysterical Strength? Spider-Man could take blows from Carol Danver, who shattered a meteor. Based on the size and fragmentation, this would require 230 Gigatons."
Wiz: "The best Mr. Incredible could survive was the Omnidroid. The robot can slam with enough force to penetrate it's body which survived an entire trip from the southern Pacific Ocean to Chicago, which is what Metroville is based on. Within seconds of disembark, it can reach it's highest destination to the clouds within seconds. With it's mass, the kinetic energy of the landing would be 290 Gigatons. That's roughly on par with Carol's meteor bust, if a smidge stronger. But even with their limits evenly matched, there is an important part to Spider-Man's Indomitable Will. It wears him out quickly, leaving him open for attacks, where Mr. Incredible's Hysterical Strength does no such signs, not even after the Omnidroid throws him around like a ragdoll."
Boomstick: "This also brings another point - his SUPER SUIT! Early versions of the Omnidroid could cut through Mr. Incredible's old suit, but the latest and strongest version he fights in the climax hasn't even laid scratches with it's sharp claws. Not to mention all the features of bulletproof, fireproof, and missile proof. Meanwhile, the kinetic energy of entering Miles dimension left Peter's suit to tethers, so much so he needed other clothing to cover his skin up. This means Spider-Man would take more damage than Mr. Incredible."
Wiz: "Spider-Man was an amazing opponent in the heat of battle, but Mr. Incredible's fast improvising, hysterical strength, and defenses in his super suit left Peter stuck in his own web."
Boomstick: "This was incredibly heart-wrenching for this Peter to die this way, but it was also spectacular."
Wiz: "And I thought Spider-Man's puns were bad. The winner is Mr. Incredible."
Advantages & Disadvantages[]
- Spider-Man (Peter B. Parker)
- + Significantly smarter & more experienced
- + Spider-Sense counters many of Bob's strategies
- - Indomitable Will < Hysterical Strength
- - Overwhelmed in stats
- Mr. Incredible
- + Stronger & faster
- + Suit makes him more durable
- + Incredibile could match Web Shooters and Dimensional Watch capability
- - Not many defenses against Spider-Sense
Soundtrack[]
The cover name would be "Back To Incredibility". The music would have a hardcore orchestra and heavy jazz, like from the Incredibles soundtrack, with added record scratches.
The track cover would have the Incredibles logo made out of spider webs, which have trapped the two pieces of Mr. Incredible's original logo. In the background, there would be a city landscape, with lighting you'd see in Mr. Incredible's Glory Days and shading from Spider-Verse's homage to comic books.
Trivia[]
- The connections:
- Both are red-and-blue-clad superheroes protecting their city from tyranny, who become old and married with kids
- Both have a bad public image to most (Daily Bugle claims him to be a menace and Supers were sued to becoming inactive due to property damage)
- Both lost one of the most important thing in their lives through 15 years, though in opposite was (Peter lost his aunt May, got divorced by MJ, and lives in an apartment alone, while still having the Spider-Man mantle. Meanwhile, Bob has his wife, Elastigirl, and children, Dash, Violet, and Jack-Jack, but miss the glory days of saving and helping people.), but one adventure restored their faith
- This fight would be animated in 3D. There will be major 2D esthetics to compliment the Spider-Verse style.
