The original vs the reboot. The old vs the new. Yes sirs & mams, it's yet another Godzilla vs Himself Death battle!
Interlude[]
Tabashi: Reboots. The adults hate 'em, but the kids love 'em. And why, you may ask?
Angel: Simple. The adults hate the reboots because of the emotional connection, but the kids love them because new technology makes the movie better.
Tabashi: Well, today we'll be pitting a classic against a modern.
Angel: G54, the 1954 original Godzilla and perhaps the most famous incarnation to date.
Tabashi: And Shin Godzilla, the 2016 Japanese reboot and perhaps the most despised incarnation to date.
Angel: Now, in order to make this fair, we will be adjusting G54's height to 400 feet (as he was in the colored, Americanized version of his movie), or else he would be helplessly squashed.
Tabashi: Also, since G54 was included in the Millennium series (a few times, actually), we will only be using the version from Godzilla 1954, or else Shin's fate would be immediately sealed.
Angel: Lastly, Shin Godzilla will be in his 4th form (at his tallest height of 394 feet), or else it'd be no contest who would win.
Tabashi: Right. Now, with that out of the way-
Angel: He's Tabashi and I'm Angel!
Tabashi: And it is our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skill sets to determine who would be the victor in-
Angel: -Yet another Godzilla vs Himself Death Battle!
Original Godzilla[]
Tabashi: The year was 1954, and Japan was not looking good.
Angel: Yeah, if two nuclear bombs dropped on me, I'd be a little messed up, too.
Tabashi: Unfortunately for Japan, though, something much, MUCH worse would come to ravage Tokyo.
Angel: Godzilla, the King of the Monsters. This radioactive reptile was woken up by the nukes, and he was PISSED at humanity for disturbing his sleep. So, like any civilized Kaiju, G54 ravaged Tokyo, destroying buildings and killing humans. Damn man, we didn't mean to wake you up!
Tabashi: Anyways, the military was sent to kill Godzilla, but it was all in vain when he busted out his big guns: the Vapor Breath.
Angel: Wait, Vapor Breath!?
Tabashi: No, not like that! It's just his Atomic Breath in black-and-white!
Angel: Oh, my bad. Anyways, Godzilla seemed unkillable, and the Japanese needed something to defeat him. So a guy named Daisuke Serizawa came up with an answer-
Tabashi: -In the form of one of the deadliest, most badass weapons in Kaiju history: the Oxygen Destroyer! This baby releases a deadly chemical called Micro-Oxygen, which kills its victims by destroying organic matter on atomic levels, causing the de-cohering of the surrounding atoms, thus disassembling the targets.
Angel: This results in the victims either melting them down to the bone, or (when the Oxygen Destroyer is used to its full potential) disintegrating everything completely. Also, the O² Destroyer has a power output of 23.4 Petatons-10 Exatons of TNT, so there's that, too. So yeah, long story short, Serizawa used his weapon on Godzilla, killing him for good and ending the franchise right then and there.
(*both of them start laughing hysterically, which goes on for about 10 minutes.*)
Tabashi: Yeah, hell no it didn't! But G54 still had a few abilities, so let's run through them. In his movie, he stood at 164 feet (or 50 meters) tall, and weighs 20,000 metric tons. Because of this, we can safely assume he can lift at least 20,000 metric tons.
Angel: And this Godzilla, for his size, is decently fast, being able to walk/run at (well, at the very least, anyway) around 77mph. His swimming speed is likely higher than that, and he can react to jets that can fly at 683mph.
Tabashi: Oh, by the way, when we factored in his travel speed and weight, we found out that G54 has a kinetic energy yield of (again, at the very least) around 3 tons of TNT. In addition to his strength and speed, G54 also has average intelligence, superhuman stamina, and can survive temperatures ranging between 212-2,597.1°F.
Angel: But his most famous ability is, of course, the Vapor Breath. It can reach temperatures of 2,597.1°F, and 11 Megatons of TNT in power output.
Tabashi: G54 has survived 50 kilovolts (or 1.2 tons of TNT) of electricity with absolutely no damage whatsoever, and was swimming in the section of the ocean he was boiling with his Vapor Breath.
Angel: And, as per usual, this Godzilla is invulnerable to conventional military firepower. But this Godzilla is not without his weaknesses. Those are... uh... actually, what the f@#k are this one's weaknesses!?
Tabashi: Well, while G54 doesn't have any specific weaknesses, he is sorely lacking in true fighting experience, as he hasn't fought any other Kaiju before. Also, the Oxygen Destroyer did, for all intents and purposes, kill him. Also, compared to the other incarnations of Godzilla, G54 is quite slow.
Angel: But if that's all that's holding him back, you'd better not screw with the Original Godzilla!
