Description[]
Undertale VS OFF! These white, forever grinning monsters like to help you through your quest and judge you near its end. But do something wrong, and you're gonna have a bad time. Which of these seemingly weak characters who know more than they should would prevail in a battle to the death?
Interlude[]
(Cue Invader)
Boomstick: Y'know, there's something always odd about video games recently. It seems that some characters these days give off a light-hearted attitude, but in the very end they THEN get the feeling to put on a more serious game.
Wiz: When a player goes through a world of exploration with a destined quest to complete, have they ever thought about what their actions may impact in that very world?
Boomstick: So if you were to say... murder everyone, in this case a close relative such as a younger brother, how would you think that person would feel?
Wiz: When it comes to these two considered physically weak combatants, wouldn't they give it their all to stop you on your rampage? Why not even judge you for your supposedly wrong doings?
Boomstick: Sans, the comical skeleton of Snowdin.
Wiz: And The Judge, the Guardian of Zone 0.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle!
Sans[]
(Cue Undertale - Once Upon a Time)
Boomstick: Long ago, two races dominated the world: Humans... and Furries.
Wiz: Monsters, actually.
Boomstick: All was peaceful until sudden war broke out. Thanks to a personality trait that humans held dubbed DETERMINATION, caps and all, the Monsters didn't stand a chance.
Wiz: Every Monster race was then sealed into the Underground with a barrier that cannot be broken. One may go in, but they could never go back out.
Boomstick: That was true, but then they figured "Hey, let's get some goddamn Human SOULS and break this thing!" Because just why the hell not?
Wiz: Despite this breakthrough of information, the chances that that many Humans would enter the Underground was near impossible! Not to mention somehow harvesting their SOULS! A bright future seemed bleak for them, as they would always be trapped in the Underground forever.
Boomstick: So out of all the sentient airplanes, the muscular fish ladies, and the evil vegetables, which Monster would stand out the most to save their kind?
Cue the sound of a Whoopee Cushion | Stop Music
sans: heheh... the old whoopee cushion in the hand trick.
Boomstick: Eh, I don't know so much about him.
(Cue Undertale - Snowdin)
Wiz: Sans is the older, skeletal brother of the duo that one day mysteriously appeared in the town of Snowdin alongside his brother Papyrus. Despite their eerie entrance, they've made themselves at home while the others moved on like nothing was amiss.
Boomstick: That's... creepy. Even creepier when they managed to get their own jobs! Both Sans and Papyrus make their livings scouting out for humans, Papyrus being a fanatic for it and Sans... not so much.
Wiz: Sans, to the regular eye, seems like the epitome of the term "lazybones". No pun intended.
Boomstick: Speaking of puns!
sans: hey, take it easy. I've gotten a ton of work done today. A skele-ton.
Boomstick: Oh, that was just awful! I love him already!
Wiz: Even when he's working two jobs, he's not doing much work. In fact, when he did eventually cross paths with the last Human required to be harvested, he didn't take the child or capturing it seriously.
Boomstick: AND depending on whatever existential crisis on a collapsing timeline is occurring, spoilers by the way, that may have been a bad decision.
Music Fades Away
Wiz: While Sans himself may seem innocent, frail, and harmless, there is something we didn't mention. While yes, Sans himself is lazy as all hell, he wasn't like this before. He was actually a more serious character, taking things sternly and with focus.
Boomstick: What can you do to bring this back? Well, let me tell you about that.
sans: it's a beautiful day outside...
Boomstick: Y'see, humans have this weird ability to manipulate the timelines, that weird thing I just said. Keep going with it as it is... or completely get rid of it and replace it with a new one.
sans: birds are singing...
Boomstick: Sans himself is completely aware of this and the kid shifting it, distorting it; and say you want to give everyone a good 'ol case of Genocide.
sans: flowers are blooming...
Boomstick: And once you make all the monsters near extinct and you believe you just gave the Underground a taste of what hell is...
sans: on days like this, kids like you...
Boomstick: Sans would gladly show you what hell really is.
sans: S H O U L D B E B U R N I N G I N H E L L
(Cue Undertale - Megalovania)
Wiz: Underneath all those puns and uplifting charisma, Sans does have a need to act at his full, hidden power once things go dark.
Boomstick: In a twist of fate, once you kill nearly everybody Sans knows and loves, he'll attack you directly since nobody else really has the force to stop you. And hell if he isn't the king of doing so, proving my point by being so fast that a bloodlusted Frisk can't even land a proper hit on him! Even when he's asleep, he knows when you're going to strike.
Wiz: Sans can perform osteokinesis, meaning he can throw as many bones at opponents as he possibly can. He also has the ability to summon large and mysterious creatures called Gaster Blasters. On command, these beasts exert a wide laser-like beam of energy that can catch you and give you trouble if you're not careful.
Boomstick: And like his brother, Sans can manipulate your SOUL... by making it BLUE. Once he turns it blue, it pretty much forces you to fight against gravity, which gives him the full right to make you his personal ragdoll. Speaking of things blue, he can use a variety of blue bones, which are basically blue stop signs. If you speed right through them, it's gonna hurt. If you stop and let it pass, it won't do anything at all.
Wiz: Sans, unlike most of the Monsters, has more knowledge of what's going on than most. For instance, Sans is aware of the fourth wall, and uses the ability to break it to his advantage. Game mechanics in an active turn-based RPG, such as invincibility frames when taking damage, are completely ignored. Another instance is his use of "shortcuts", which can be interpreted to be teleportation. In fact, they could be the same "shortcuts" used when Sans mysteriously blinks out and back with a new attack out of the wazoo.
Boomstick: That may sound like any opponent in his path will be ultimately annihilated, but it all comes down to one staggering weakness. Sans only has 1 ATK, meaning all the regular damage he does equals to pretty much nada.
Wiz: Despite this, Sans does have one more ability we haven't mentioned, though it's a vague ability. Through a level of sinful deeds that you have performed, things such as manslaughter, any attack that Sans lands on his opponents that has done a number of sins will be affected by something we'll just reference to as KARMA. Think of it like a temporary poison status. Every time Sans hits you with a bone or a Gaster Blaster, you will temporarily have your health drained as caused by your level of KARMA. If you have done a minimal amount of sins, it won't affect you much. But if you have murdered countless species to extinction, that's... going to hurt you. A lot.
Boomstick: And when all else fails, he'll pull out his ultimate attack. It's... nothing. Literally nothing. Remember all that Game Mechanics stuff from before? He completely abuses that rule by not doing anything, thus not attacking, thus making his turn last forever. Pretty damn genius if you ask me.
(Cue Undertale - Heartache)
Wiz: Alas, Sans is not a perfect person... or monster, and with good reason. While we have discussed his 1 ATK crippling him, we have yet to discuss his following 1 DEF, meaning any good blow, no matter how strong or weak you are, is gonna do him off.
Boomstick: Yes, Sans is very fast and can dodge for a long time, but he can't dodge forever. One good hit while he's off guard will get him, well, killed. And turned into dust. I don't know how that works.
Wiz: Another key weakness is San's laziness and carelessness. Even when in a serious moment, Sans himself can lose focus by doing things such as falling asleep midbattle. Though he can react to this in some instances, him slouching would eventually become his downfall.
Boomstick: But this prankster skeleton is a monster on the battlefield. He'll fight on to protect the timeline at all costs, whether it be killing you over and over again, tricking you into oblivion, or bringing you to the Bone Zone. You may be ready to murder, but Sans is ready for someone to get motherfucking dunked on!
sans: heya. you've been busy, huh? ... so, i've got a question for ya. do you think even the worst person can change...? that everyone can be a good person, if they just try?
Frisk walks forward by one step toward Sans.
sans: heh heh heh heh... all right. well, here's a better question. do you wanna have a bad time?
The Judge[]
(Cue OFF - Fourteen Residents)
Wiz: In a world where the entire existence of the universe itself is reliant on a switch, it's expected that life isn't as pretty as one may think.
Boomstick: It's a "No Shit" scenario when that, thanks to the egotistical maniacs and insane people, there wouldn't be much life when you're crazy enough to try and stop the universe from existing.
Wiz: Enter Hugo, a small child that was very sick at the time. He had terminal illnesses, progeria, breathing problems, and many other sicknesses that required him to be heavily medicated.
Boomstick: Wow, kid has a stronger will than the Make-A-Wish Foundation. In fact, he had a will so strong that HE BECAME GOD. Since then, he also thought "Hey, my parents are probably dead, so let's make some new ones!" He created Vader Eloha, his new mother, and The Batter, his new father. They didn't have faces for some reason.
Wiz: While Vader was loving and caring, The Batter was an emotionless husk of a being. He later abandoned Hugo for Vader to look after him. Following these cases, Hugo met three other survivors, helping them rebuild their lives and solve their problems. In turn, they would help create a better world for Hugo, and they did.
Boomstick: Once Vader, or also The Queen if we want to get formal, got back and saw the three helping the kid, the united to make the universe a little more... colorful. First a fucking SUN, then three continent-sized areas dubbed Zones, those three special helpers becoming their Guardians. It seemed that them and their mutated survivor friends would live in peace...
(Cue Mario and Luigi: Paper Jam - Funny Going-Ons)
Wiz: Yeah, with a backstory like this, not gonna happen. Things got corrupt, The Queen had to lock Hugo in her room forever, make everything strict, just bad times in general. That's when you, yes, YOU, even though you are not physically there (even in the game itself you're more of a concept), come into the picture.
Boomstick: You just waltz in and are for some reason assigned with- Oh hey, it's The Batter! He now renamed himself the "embodiment of Purification" and requests you to aid him in his quest to rid the realms of evil. You accept because... why not?
Wiz: And upon arrival in Zone 0, you are greeted by...
The Judge: There cannot be any other living beings in Zone 0, so I must assume that you are only a mere figment of my imagination. Nevertheless, I will introduce myself. I am The Judge, and I am aching to know your name, dear elusory interlocutor. | Stop Music
Boomstick: So this what happens when a cat and a thesaurus get too friendly.
(Cue OFF - Clockwork)
Wiz: Ew... This is Pablo, or as he prefers to call himself, The Judge. Now while you may simply say "Okay" and move on, notice something for a second. If there were only three zones created, how did Zone 0 come about?
Boomstick: Trick question! Pablo did some of his own handiwork and built a new one! Why? That's a secret for the next minute and thirty seconds! But it's not really packing in the size department, and it's more-so a safe haven than an actual place. Too bad nobody ever really shows up...
Wiz: With the Judge being the only one considered it's Guardian, he acts as a living tutorial, showing the Batter how the world works and even helping with his quest to purify the Zones.
Boomstick: And off this man went, blinding both the Judge and you of what his real deal was. Regardless, it was in no time that The Batter had "purified" Zone 1, killing the Guardian Dedan and thus killing off any or all life in that Zone. It's a long story to explain.
(Cue Mario and Luigi: Paper Jam - Funny Going-Ons)
Wiz: Basically, the Queen granted the three Guardians of the Zones, Dedan, Japhet, and Enoch, the power to rule over and maintain the Zones. Whatever happens to the Guardians also happens to the Zones and all life within them. If they die, so does the Zone and all life in it. All that's really left is a husk of what it is, a monochrome wasteland that lacks color and, obviously, any signs of life.
Boomstick: And once the Zones began breaking down due to the Guardians slowly becoming more corrupt and egotistical, the Queen sent an army of specters to maintain the land. That was... until the Batter showed up and began not killing only the Zones, but also all these ghost things.
(Continue OFF - Clockwork)
Wiz: Onto the second Zone, we meet up with Pablo's younger brother, Valērie, who... sadly wasn't really even alive. He was killed prior to the Batter's entrance by Japhet, who controlled his body like a puppet hiding while hiding within his mouth.
Boomstick: Oh...
Wiz: And when it came time to fight Japhet within Valērie, The Judge followed as he noticed his dear brother's strange behavior.
Boomstick: Oh no...
Wiz: As the two fought, Japhet slowly revealed himself more and more, destroying the corpse of the cat as they fought on.
Boomstick: I don't like where this is going, can you just maybe not-
Wiz: The Judge watched as The Batter mercilessly killed Japhet, whom at this time was wearing the mangled dead Valērie as a disfigured necklace. And just like that, Zone 2 had been "purified".
Boomstick: Good Lord, that must've hit him deep.
Wiz: It indeed did, causing him go into a deep state of depression to the point where Pablo himself couldn't even aid The Batter through the third Zone, having a mysterious close friend/merchant replace him temporarily. All he could do was meow in a cry that only spelled pure grief.
The Batter: What are you doing?
The Judge: I am meowing at my lung's fullest. I would even argue that the echo that reverberates back to me is the voice of someone I know... Have you seen my dear brother.
Wiz: But as he took his break, he also took his time to think. He brainstormed and contemplated what he just witnessed.
The Judge dashes up towards the Batter.
Wiz: Just who was The Batter?
The Judge: Stop right there, you impostor!
Wiz: He wanted to "purify" the Zones, but he's doing it by killing. Was there perhaps a little white lie that was within the murderer's motif?
The Judge: I must say that I had placed the blindest of confidences, the solidest of hopes and the most sincere belief in you.
Wiz: He was left baffled, not at The Batter, but himself.
The Judge: We can well say I have erred to the bones.
Wiz: He had now realized what The Batter wishes for, and The Judge could only blame himself.
The Judge: Is the opaque mist of the sceneristic frame really your excuse for killing wife and child?
Wiz: Pablo underestimated The Batter.
Boomstick: But by this point, it was already too late. The Batter had completely wiped out Zone 3, and had gotten near to the end of the rainbow. He battered the Queen, his own wife, to oblivion. Not long after, he easily destroyed his frail son. Hell, he didn't even remember Hugo's name!
Wiz: Only two lifeforms remained, excluding The Batter himself. It seemed victory was near for the cold killer, as the previously mentioned switch that determined the fate of all life was just nearby. But just before he could turn off that switch in the hall...
The Judge: Your demented crusade ends here!
Wiz: A feline avenger intervened.
(Cue OFF - Pepper Steak)
Boomstick: The Judge declared that The Batter's actions were unjust and only deemed acceptable from a madman, and he's not wrong. But as we can guess from generic plot cliches, The Judge wasn't really a match for the cold killer at his peak along with his three onion ring friends. And thus, the entire universe was switched OFF... following some monkey aliens taking over, but that's just how this world works.
Wiz: We're not done, however, because that's just the initial canon. Another canon that you yourself can decide what really happens. You can side with The Judge and fight the Batter, giving him just the extra strength to take him out for good.
Boomstick: Take him out, that is, in The Judge's perspective. Of which makes The Batter really fucking creepy and scary to look at. Keep your children away at all costs.
Wiz: To combat against the likes of The Batter, Pablo himself has to be fit enough to fight back. In both ways that OFF! ends, he can injure Batter and tank any output of damage that he receives from him.
Boomstick: Not only is he strong and durable, but The Judge is hella fast! He can scale buildings in a blink of an eye, and as we just said five seconds ago, keeps up with the also fast Batter, who once traveled to the Sun from a dying Earth in just a few seconds!
Wiz: The distance from the Earth and Sun is about 149,598,000,000 meters. The time it takes for The Batter, which is represented by a cursor, to reach the Sun is about 1.38 seconds. By simple division, we can calculate that this results to 108,404,347,826 meters per second. That's over 300 times the speed of light!
Source of this Silly Calculation can be found here.
Boomstick: But this kitty cat can't just fight with his claws and really sharp teeth alone. He uses his Competences to bring a mix to the table. He can attack with brute force with a various selection of Aneurysm attacks, going from light scratches to fatal blows. The best part? It has a complete 100% accuracy of hitting.
Wiz: Pablo also holds a select set of unavoidable Sclerosis-themed attacks that inflict statuses such as Poison, Blindness, Muteness (the inability to use special moves), and Palsy (Paralysis). Oddly enough, these attacks are named after real, serious medical disorders. Aneurysms are built-up blood clots in arteries, while Sclerosis negatively affects the central nervous system. Whether these attacks are only named to seem like Pablo is capable of inflicting it or him actually inflicting it, we don't know. It can only be described as amazingly vivid!
Boomstick: He can teleport, too. That's cool.
Wiz: Though one of if not Pablo's best ability and talent is his own intelligence. He immediately shows his immense knowledge, knowing not only most of his own universe, but also the mechanics of the very game of OFF itself. It's even said in an official introduction that he knows what's going on behind the screen.
Boomstick: Sound familiar?
(Cue OFF - Flesh Maze Tango)
Boomstick: Well, it doesn't matter anyways, because The Judge still has some weaknesses on him. Like had done so with the Batter, Pablo has shown to underestimate the full potential of those he meet.
Wiz: To add to it, Pablo kind of... breaks down if Valērie is ever mentioned or thought of, as we've clearly seen before with-
Boomstick: Don't you even dare remind me. That shit's nightmare fuel.
Wiz: ...Otherwise, he doesn't really have that many weaknesses that are notable.
Boomstick: Well that's not surprising. One of the Judge's weirdest feats was still being there after the purification sequence of the second Zone. Remember all that "everything" dies bit when a Zone is destroyed? When Japhet died and everything was supposed to follow with him, the Judge... didn't. He just continued grieving and- OH GOD IT HURTS TO REMEMBER!
Wiz: Though it could be the fact that the Judge himself is a guardian, it's still an odd mystery. Regardless of what's he done or is capable of, the Judge is definitely more than meets the eye. Even if there's no real reason in trying to win, Pablo will intervene in the face of darkness, ready to avenge the deaths by the hands of genocidal monsters.
Boomstick: WHY IS THIS GAME SO DARK!?
The Judge: You have not purified this place. You have destroyed, eradicated it. You have immersed it into a pristine nothingness. I should not have lent you my hand. I should have detected the black flame that consumed your soul from the beginning. The time has now come to render your final and futile judgement.
DEATH BATTLE![]
Wiz: All right, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all!
Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTLE!
In Judgement Hall......[]
Pablo, better known as The Judge, was walking until he found a skeleton. "Heya, You been real busy, huh." The Skeleton said.. Pablo just gave a scowl out the skeleton known as Sans... "So, i have a question for you... Wanna have a bad time?" as Sans eye flashed blue.
FIGHT![]
Sans then fired Gaster blasters at Pablo, who dodged each one, as he turn blue. "What you are doing is not purifying this place. Your just making it worse. This is your final judgement." Pablo said as he ran to Sans, who summoned a ton of bone's in front of Pablo to shield him.
"Huh, you seem like a bigger threat than your actual height!" Sans said as he summoned more gaster blasters at Pablo. Pablo almost got hit. "You remind me of someone I found.. Someone who said he had a brother that was wearing a blue jacket. One that has a red scarf like this one." said Pablo as he pulled out a red scarf. "Pa-pa-papyrus?!?! What you did to him must now P A Y!" as Sans summoned a Lot of gaster blasters. This is what Pablo needed. He needed to make sure this skeleton would be worn down so he can finish him off.
Sans knew what Pablo was trying to do. So he sneak attacked Pablo and Hit him with a bone. That when Pablo realized something when he felt hurt.. he was poisoned by this skeleton. Pablo just gave an angered look at Sans. That's when Pablo found some dust on the scarf. 'Perfect.' Pablo thought. Meanwhile, Sans summoned some gaster blasters around Pablo. "Good bye!" as soon as sans said that the gaster blasters fired all at once. When they were done, all that was there dust at where Pablo was standing at. "GET DUNKED ON!" Sans said as he saw the dust, but that when he heard feet running behind him. Sans summoned a bone shield as soon as what was coming hit it.
"You honestly thought that would work? You seem like a b a d b r o t h e r." the thing behind the bone shield said, which is revealed to be Pablo. That was when sans had an angry look on his face. "First of all, how did you survive the Blasters, second of all, I. AM. NOT. A. BAD. BROTHER!" Sans yelled at Pablo sending a lot of bones near him.
"This fight is going to end... now." Pablo said as he ran on top of the bones. Sans then summoned two Giant gaster blasters at Pablo. "Try to escape this!" Sans said as they fired. Pablo just teleported on top of the head of one of them. Pablo kicked the dust that was left from papyrus that was on the scarf at Sans. "Ok, that was hurtful, and now your PISSING ME OFF!" Sans yelled. That's when sans summoned more gaster blasters from his disposal at The Judge. As usual, the judge just teleported away before he was killed. "Time for my special attack!"
*Crickets chirp* "This is it. It's nothing. you cant attack me until i finish my turn, so we'll be here forever."
Announcer:Finish him!
Sans said to Pablo. Pablo teleported to sans, And kept slashing at the skeleton's head. When Pablo was done, Sans head instantly broke. His body on the other hand, fell to the ground. Sans was finished, and Pablo smiled at his Victory.
KO!
Results[]
Boomstick: Well, there goes my favorite character.
Wiz: While Sans and Pablo were probably even in speed, everything else went to Pablo.
Boomstick: While Sans was aware that his opponent was dangerous and could end his life, Pablo was the smarter one, His attacks are 100% Accuracy, and are way better than anything Sans had.
Wiz: All sans could do was delay the inevitable before Pablo got that lucky hit ending the poor skeleton.
Boomstick: Also, it doesn't really help Sans that he's a glass cannon and pablo can actually interrupt Sans' special attack.. Look's like The Skeleton who works, wont be getting a Skele-ton more work anymore. God, i couldn't think of a good pun.
Wiz: The Winner is Pablo!
Next Time![]
Boomstick: NEXT TIME ON DEATH BATTLE!
LANCE SHOOT'S FIRST IN DEATH BATTLE!
| Sans VS Judge
| |
|---|---|
| Season 9, Episode unknown | |
Vital statistics
| |
| Air date | Unknown |
| Written by | RatedM |
| Directed by | RatedM |
Episode guide
| |
| Previous | Next |
| Pharah VS War Machine | ??? |
| “ | get dunked ooooooooon | „ |
| ~ RatedM |
Sans VS Judge is the Season 9 Finale of RatedM's DB series featuring Sans from the Undertale series and The Judge from the OFF series in a battle between smiling RPG judges!
Description[]
Undertale VS OFF! Can Judge take on Undertale's devastating skeleton in a fight to the death? The answer is here!