| Rejection vs Perfection | |
|---|---|
| Season | 1 |
| Season Episode | 1 |
| Air date | June 7, 2019 |
| Written by | Professor Mewtwo |
| Episode guide | |
| Previous None |
Next Korosensei vs Sans |
SMG4 Waluigi vs Peanut Butter is a What-If? Death Battle created by Professor Mewtwo it features Waluigi from SMG4 pitted against Peanut Butter from Pokemon Rusty
Description[]
SMG4 vs Dorkly! Its Rejection vs Perfection as these two muscular parodies of underated Nintendo characters clash in a showdown of apocolyptic proportions. Will Waluigi and his T-pose zombies prevail or will they become one with Bidoof (which is Peanut Butter's cute little way of saying dead).
Poll[]
Got any roots or bets? Make sure to vote in the discussion poll!
Interlude[]
Wiz: It should go without saying that you should never underestimate your opponent. No matter how weak they might seem, they could possess a talent that could become your downfall.
Boomstick: And in the case of these two combatants that talent became the downfall of EVERYONE.
Wiz: Waluigi the most rejected fiend in the Mushroom Kingdom.
Boomstick: And Peanut Butter the most perfect Pokemon in the world. He’s Wiz and I’m Boomstick.
Wiz: And it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win… a Death Battle.
Waluigi[]
Wiz: Throughout his entire life Waluigi has felt the entire world rejecting him. When he was just a child he was separated from his brother Wario and took out his sorrow on everyone around him. His attitude was so horrible that he managed to commit every known crime in his home kingdom and was eventually exiled.
Boomstick: But things started looking up when he wound up in the Mushroom Kingdom and reunited with Wario and together the duo started a campaign to get as rich as possible by stealing, scamming, and any other crime imaginable because what else are you going to do when you look like villains out of an old cartoon. But all that money and brotherly love became meaningless when Waluigi set his sights on a greater goal: getting a spot in the great game known to the world as: SUPER SMAAAAAAAAAASHHH BROTHERS!!!! Oh how I love that intro.
Wiz: In order to be in Smash Bros., Waluigi had to demonstrate abilities that made him unique among all other fighters however every talent Waluigi possessed was either done better by another fighter or was just plain useless.
Boomstick: Even Wario couldn’t think of anything special about Waluigi so he left the poor guy to face his own predicament. Kind of a d*** move for someone who's supposed to be a big brother.
Wiz: In his hopeless endeavor to find what makes him unique Waluigi feel deeper and deeper into despair, coming to the ugly truth that no matter how hard he tried he would always be rejected from Smash Bros. Ironically this would awaken the one true unique ability that he possessed.
Boomstick: Extremely good looks? The grace of a skilled dancer? The ability to beat the s*** out of people with a tennis racket?
Wiz: No, those aren't necessarily good fighting move either, besides the power Waluigi gained was something far more terrifying than anyone could imagine. Turns out that Waluigi has been rejected by the world for so long that his negative emotions manifest itself into raw power causing misfortune to anyone who dared faced it. This ability is something only Waluigi himself could attain, this is: the power of rejection.
Boomstick: Well the naming could have been better, but this power was enough to impress Master Hand and Waluigi finally earned his spot in Smash Bros...which lasted about 5 seconds before the poor guy lost all his powers and was rejected all over again.
Wiz: Turns out if Waluigi were to be accepted into Smash he would lose all feeling of rejection and become useless once again. Enraged by his fate, Waluigi went insane and vowed to use his newfound powers to teach the whole world what it means to be rejected and he has plenty of means to do so thanks to his signature weapon forged from his own powers: the Staff of Rejection!
Boomstick: This oversized magic wand isn’t just as stylish as Waluigi himself, it stores most of his rejection and allows him to fire balls on energy that when they make contact force its victim to feel all the pain Waluigi has suffered over the years. If you get hit with that there might not be any form of therapy is going to fix those problems, just look at what that pain did to Waluigi.
Wiz: The power of rejection doesn’t only alter people’s emotions Waluigi learned to channel the staff’s power to use a variety of useful abilities including flight, telekinesis, matter creation,shapeshifting, size alteration, and the ability to create portals.
Boomstick: While that last ability would be impressive it's actually redundant considering he can teleport himself and even remotely teleport others via Thanos snap and if he feels like it he can even banish his enemies to the Rejection Dimension, a plane of existence where literally nothing exists including life and companionship. That place is basically a physical metaphor for being friend zoned.
Wiz: Despite all these reality warping abilities, they all wane in comparison to Waluigi’s deadliest weapon: the T-Pose Shroom.
Boomstick: Another Mario power-up? What does this one do, turn people into cats? Trap them in a spring? Make them a clone of Peach?
Wiz: The T-Pose Shroom is essentially a weird zombie virus and when the mushroom is consumed turns the victim into a mindless zombie trapped in a T-Pose state. These zombies can spread the virus by simply by killing others or if Waluigi wants to infect people personally he can inject the virus through lightning strikes or detonate T-Pose shrooms to infect multiple targets at once.
Boomstick: And these zombies are no pushover, they may be slow and act on instinct they are practically indestructible and even possess unlimited stamina and thanks to Waluigi’s mind control he can command any one under the effects of the T-Pose virus and even release those zombies from their T-Pose state while still having influence over them. This may take away their invincibility, but it lets the zombies regain their original personality and intelligence it even allows them to use their special talents to aid Waluigi such as Meggy’s expert gunplay, Saiko’s superhuman strength, and Fishy Boopkins’ singing which is so horrible it once blew up the entire planet, and yet it's still better than Wiz doing karaoke.
Wiz: The only known means of curing the T-Pose virus is to feed the victim a 1-UP mushroom which is how Princess Peach stopped an outbreak of T-Pose zombies set loose by Waluigi, but this was all just a ploy. Waluigi purposely let Peach cure the outbreak so that the victims would reject him even further and after feeling the hatred of a thousand people, Waluigi’s power of rejection reached its pinnacle allowing him to achieve his “Final Form” further improving the power of rejection and creating a new T-Pose virus, one so powerful that there is no cure to free the victims from their zombified state.
Boomstick: Waluigi used this super virus to take control of the entire world and soon enough plunged the world into a zombie apocalypse and had everyone at his mercy, but even without his army Waluigi is incredibly strong, so strong in fact that when Master Hand tried to stop him he was taken out in an instant when Waluigi used telekinesis to effortlessly stop his punch and break every bone in his hand… which would technically be his entire body.
Wiz: Waluigi has moved fast enough to keep up with a speeding bus and even outrun a chain chomp as it chased him and Wario across the kingdom, but if there is anything truly impressive about Waluigi’s physical ability its the amount of abuse he can take.
Boomstick: Like the many times he was used as a living rocket launcher in one such occasion Mario shoved multiple explosives into his a*** which sent him flying around the planet for 10 seconds before he was finally sent out of orbit, but that is nothing compared to surviving SMG4’s 2 million subscriber collab which is so powerful it has the potential to destroy the entire Mushroom Kingdom. Yet all this power isn’t where Waluigi’s true talent lies, he is a master manipulator and thief as shown when he convinced SMG4 spend all his money on a bunch of useless rocks and when he helped SMG3 steal the world’s internet which caused another apocalypse, but with less zombies and more Mad Max people.
Wiz: Even more impressive he once left his staff nearly unguarded to lure the greatest threats to his plan into a trap so he could torture them in his own twisted version of Smash Bros. As successful as that plan was, it also pointed out Waluigi’s greatest weaknesses. He is extremely arrogant, believing that the power of rejection is unstoppable and as his staff contains most of his power destroying it would severely diminish Waluigi’s abilities to the point that even his permanent T-pose virus would be destroyed.
Boomstick: That would lead to his defeat when some random girl accidentally stole some of Waluigi’s power and used it to destroy the staff. With his army gone Wario came to save Waluigi from his sorrow and reminded Waluigi how important their brotherly bond was through a therapy session thus ending Waluigi’s reign of terror… so I guess therapy can save people from rejection.
Wiz: But as long as the world continues to despise Waluigi, none shall be safe from the wrath of the purple-clad tyrant.
Waluigi: WAAAAAH! FINE! FORGET SMASH BROS. I'LL JUST FINISH YOU ALL MYSELF. Waluigi Style...
Peanut Butter[]
Wiz: Just like the Pokemon that live in the wild, the world is filled with all kinds of Pokemon Trainers, each of them showing great care for their partners while guiding them with ingenious strategies in the heat of battle… except for one Trainer named Rusty.
Boomstick: Yeah, someone forgot to teach this dumba** the basics of Pokemon and he wound up killing every Pokemon he ever caught and even raised a Pokemon to be so evil it became the head of Team Rocket, but instead of learning from his mistakes Rusty teamed up with some EV Trainer to breed a Pokemon that would not only replace all of Rusty’s deceased Pokemon but surpass them by being the very best like no one ever was using nothing but a mass of Bidoofs and Dittos breeding with each other. But before they could see their buff baby come to life some Team Rocket Grunts ran over their breeding Pokemon with a truck both super effective and super traumatizing.
Wiz: Both Rusty and the EV Trainer believed that their breeding attempt was a failure, but moments after they left the carnage, a single survivor emerged from the corpses, this wasn’t a 5 IV, shiny, adamant nature Bidoof the Trainers were hoping for this was something far stronger than anyone could anticipate, this was The Perfect Bidoof!
Boomstick: Complete with anthropomorphism and his own underwear which really makes you wonder how the hell Pokemon breeding works if Bidoofs can suddenly be born with these traits.
Wiz: This Bidoof travelled the world seeking its creator Rusty so he could find his true purpose and after a long time searching, he found Rusty in the Kanto County Correctional Facility. After breaking Rusty out of prison the Perfect Bidoof accompanied his Trainer to help him conquer the Elite Four and become a Pokemon Master, it was at that moment that Rusty gave that Bidoof a name fitting for such a powerful Pokemon: Peanut Butter.
Boomstick: While Rusty is as good as a Trainer as he is at nicknaming gods, he didn’t need brains when Peanut Butter had plenty of brawn and being a Bidoof isn’t as bad as it seems. These Plump Mouse Pokemon are surprisingly agile and their incisors are strong enough to gnaw up boulders and even pierce through gold, and being the Perfect Bidoof means that Peanut Butter exceeds all those feats and he even has a unique set of abilities that put all other Pokemon to shame. He possess flight, telekinesis, matter creation, the ability to create portals, the ability to put his portals to shame by teleporting, and he can even shrink his body to enter people and blow them up from the inside out… Disgusting.
Wiz: But one of Peanut Butter’s favorite abilities is his transmutation where he can turn his victims into helpless Bidoofs or even turn vital organs into living Bidoofs to make the target suffer an agonizing death, and if he needs to get serious he can simply do “This.”
Peanut Butter points his hand towards a wild Suicune and charges up energy and unleashes it creating a massive explosion visible from space
Boomstick: HOLY S***! Just image how many Hyper Beams it would take to match that kind of power!
Wiz: The amount of raw energy Peanut Butter possess it unbelievable, so strong in fact that it can cause people and heavy objects around him to float when exerted and he can harness this energy to create force fields or fire blasts of energy varying in power from breaking through a brick wall to shaking the entire planet with little effort.
Boomstick: With all this power at Rusty’s command it was no wonder he managed to rise to the top of the Pokemon League after killi… err I mean defeating Agatha and taking her spot as a member of the Elite Four and to further prove his worth as a Pokemon Master, Rusty and Peanut Butter set out to catch the god-like Legendary Pokemon.
Wiz: Though much to their surprise the godly status was nothing more than superstition, all the Legendary Pokemon were actually endangered species that have been hunted down and killed by humans who sought power and profit from their abilities. After learning of humanity’s cruelty, Peanut Butter had a change of heart, he began to learn Compassion… but he only know four moves.
Boomstick: And Rusty being Rusty told Peanut Butter to forget Compassion and instead learn Thirst For Vengeance which made him go ballistic and wage war on mankind starting the catastrophe known as the Bidocalypse. Within six months he had flipped the balance of power by enslaving humanity with Pokemon ruling over them, that's quite a lot from just a single attack. In an attempt save the world Red gathered all the world’s Pokemon experts but the golden Bidoof was too much for them and they were all slaughtered in an instant and Peanut Butter can do way more than that.
Wiz: Peanut Butter is strong enough to crush a Bidoof into paste and fast enough to reach outer space meaning that can reach speeds of at least 25,020 miles per hour, not to mention he is somehow capable of talking… while in the vacuum of space. In addition he’s also demonstrated the uncanny ability to find specific people like when he tracked down every Trainer in the world who had a Kanto Gym Badge and killed them and single-handedly tracked down the secret base of the anti-Bidoof resistance. Speaking of whom, the resistance whose sole purpose was to defeat Peanut Butter concluded that the only possible way to stop him was to prevent him from existing in the first place. They built themselves a time machine out of nothing but a hot tub and a Dialga and put all their hopes into the only person who could stop Rusty from creating the perfect Bidoof.
Boomstick: Too bad the only person who could stop Rusty was himself and while he managed to convince his past self to become a sandwich delivery man, future Rusty still wanted to prove himself as a Pokemon Master and repeated every mistake he made on his journey. You would think the world would learn by now what happens when you make Rusty do anything that could horribly wrong.
Wiz: Fortunately, the time travel plan was not in vain, the result created two Rustys, the original bad Rusty who pursued becoming a Pokemon Master and a good Rusty who honed his skills into creating sandwiches. The latter of the two created a sandwich so perfect that when Peanut Butter became infatuated by its smell he ate the sandwich and became so mesmerized by its taste that his hope for humanity was reinstated and his loyalty reforged with the good Rusty.
Boomstick: Now that he was a good guy again, Peanut Butter felt the need to undo his Doofly deeds so he performed one of his greatest feats. By saying Bidoof backwards he altered all of reality so that none of his horrid actions ever happend and for good measure he chained up the bad Rusty to a deli so he could never hurt another person nor Pokemon ever again. As his final mission he and the good Rusty flew off into space to explore the universe in search of hope and adventure and they all lived happily ever after… so long as Peanut Butter never needs to use Thirst For Vengeance ever again, Arceus forbid that any world suffer another Bidocalypse.
Peanut Butter: I thought my purpose to serve. But now I see, it is to rule. I will bear this world out of the age of Man, and into “the Eon of Doof.”
Rusty: By being my friend, and doing everything I say! I love how we finish each other’s sentences. Ball time slave buddy!
DEATH BATTLE![]
In the middle of a ruined city in the Mushroom Kingdom T-pose zombies flood the streets. A horde of zombies are seen attempting to enter a building but with no luck, and at the top of that building a boy dressed as a Pokemon Trainer is seen looking down upon the chaos.
Rusty: Wow there sure are a lot of strange looking people, there must be a parade going on down there. It’s a good thing we picked the perfect picnic spot to we get a good view of all this neat stuff going on.
Rusty turns around and walks towards a picnic set up surrounded by sandwiches with a sexy looking Clefairy and a large golden Bidoof sitting down ready to eat.
Peanut Butter: Though this place feels dangerous, as long as I may continue to feast on these magnificent sandwiches I am certain that this will be one of many perfect picnics.
Cleffaye: Clee-fayyye (agreeing in Pokemon-nese)
Rusty: Well I’m glad we’re all in agreement, but the Rusty special doesn’t stay fresh forever so how about we dig in without any more interruptions.
???: Waaaaaaahahaha
Peanut Butter hears this mysterious laugh and turns around only to see three bolts of lightning heading towards the group. Peanut Butter manages to dodge one of the bolts in time, but the other two bolts hit Rusty and Cleffaye turning them into T-pose zombies. The golden Bidoof is shocked by what happened to his friends while a muscular man holding a staff descends from the sky.
Waluigi: It seems I missed a few survivors. Oh well, your next big guy!
Peanut Butter turns around and recognizes the source of the attack. Angered by the loss of his Trainer, he starts radiating golden energy and flies towards Waluigi while preparing himself for combat. Waluigi tightens his grip on his staff, ready to take down the approaching challenger.
Peanut Butter: You have harmed my father, the creator of miracles, you shall pay with your life!
FIGHT!
Waluigi fires a bolt of lightning while Peanut Butter retaliates with an energy blast. The energy blast breaks through the lightning and hits Waluigi sending him flying backwards hundreds of feet. Peanut Butter moves quickly and punches Waluigi towards the ground before he can recover sending the rejected villain into a building, destroying the structure on impact. Waluigi recovers in time only to see the Plump Mouse Pokemon meet him on the ground.
Peanut Butter: Your stats are inferior to mine, you cannot win.
Waluigi: Perhaps, but it’s a good thing I’m not alone. Attack my minions!
Suddenly an army of T-pose zombies come out of nowhere and pounce upon Peanut Butter in an attempt to beat him to death. However, Peanut Butter manages to overpower the zombies and throw them all off. Waluigi takes advantage of the situation and throws his staff at Peanut Butter hitting him right in the “pingas” which manages to stun him.
Waluigi flies towards Peanut Butter, unleashing a flurry of punches before sending the beaver flying with a Shoryuken. He retrieves his staff with telekinesis and fires a ball of lightning, but Peanut Butter manages to teleport away and appears right behind Waluigi before grabbing him by the throat.
Peanut Butter: That attack was super effective...
Peanut Butter tightens his grip in an attempt to strangle Waluigi.
Peanut Butter: at making me angry.
Waluigi uses his own teleportation to get away and unleashes an angry “WAH”. He then proceeds to shoot more lightning at Peanut Butter, but his attacks are easily dodged by the golden Bidoof. Peanut Butter fires a beam which misses Waluigi but breaks his concentration allowing Peanut Butter to fly towards Waluigi to throw another punch, but right as he gets close Waluigi snaps his fingers causing a brief flash of light.
When the light clears, a shadowy figure is seen flying into a brick wall and Peanut Butter follows up the attack with multiple energy blasts then heads towards the figure to finish it off.
Peanut Butter: You are indeed resilient, I almost thought I couldn’t break you.
But right as the dust clears the shadowy figure is revealed to be Princess Peach as a T-pose zombie
Peanut Butter: WHAT!?
Upon seeing the decoy Peanut Butter also realizes that he is no longer in the city and has been transported to a large castle, but before he has time to process the situation he is surrounded by Toad T-pose zombies who proceed to charge at him, but Peanut Butter fends them off one by one using a mix of punches, energy blasts, and telekinesis. Meanwhile a frustrated Waluigi watches from above.
Waluigi: WAAAAAAH! These zombies are useless! I need something that can fight better.
Waluigi’s upset frown turns into a wicked smile as he comes up with an idea as he summons some familiar looking T-pose zombies before hitting them with a red bolt of lightning. Meanwhile, Peanut Butter had finished fighting the zombie Toads by launching them far away.
Peanut Butter: There is no use hiding, I know that you are near.
Waluigi flies down in front of Peanut Butter and begins to fire multiple balls of electricity, but Peanut Butter creates a barrier and charges through each of the attacks and then throws another punch at Waluigi who also attempts to punch his opponent. Their fists collide causing a massive shockwave, and during the collision a small red dot appears on the back of Peanut Butter’s head as he is stunned by a splash of ink allowing Waluigi to send Peanut Butter flying with a kick. Peanut Butter recovers and notices that Meggy, who is under Waluigi’s control, is targeting him with a Splat Charger.
The perfect Bidoof starts firing lasers at the Inkling only for Meggy to dodge each blast, Peanut Butter stops firing when he hears large footstep approaching and turns around to see Bowser who grabs him and repeatedly punches him before throwing Peanut Butter into the air where he is suddenly hit by an incoming rocket while the attacker watches from a distance.
Shroomy: Heheh, I got him!
Peanut Butter falls to the ground where Luigi is waiting and fires a plunger from his poltergeist at Peanut Butter’s face, however this only annoys Peanut Butter and he punches Luigi knocking him back to where Waluigi’s other minions are preparing to attack again. Waluigi suddenly teleports right above his minions.
Waluigi: Your resistance is futile! Everyone falls to the power of rejection eventually!
Waluigi’s minions begin charging as Peanut Butter gets up with an expression implying that he has reached the limit of his rage.
Peanut Butter: This is a one on one battle, I will not allow you to break these rules any longer! Bidoof!
Peanut Butter waves his hand and transforms Waluigi’s minions into helpless Bidoofs who trip and tumble due to the unexpected change.
Waluigi: How dare you turn my minions into fat rodents! I will-
Peanut Butter: Bidoof!
Waluigi: AAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!
Small Bidoofs appear where Waluigi’s eyes and mouth once were and begin tearing him apart from the inside out, but Waluigi uses his shapeshifting to turn his face back to normal.
Waluigi: THAT'S IT! I AM GOING TO MAKE A FUR COAT OUT OF YOUR-
Waluigi is interrupted once again as Peanut Butter sends him flying with an energy blast followed by repeatedly teleporting and punching Waluigi before finally knocking Waluigi onto the roof of the castle. Peanut Butter then begins to charge up energy for a finishing blow.
Peanut Butter: You were indeed a worthy opponent, but I am perfection. I can never lose to a reject like you.
Waluigi realizes he is in danger and uses telekinesis to gather up nearby T-pose zombies to form a massive shield around him. Peanut Butter fires his attack creating an explosion visible from space. The attack leaves a large crater where the castle once was with an injured Waluigi in the center. Waluigi realizes that his staff is not in hand in finds it just a few feet away, but Peanut Butter teleports right between Waluigi and his weapon and glares at the purple tyrant who starts looking scared.
Waluigi: I surrender! I can’t beat you without my staff, just please spare me!
Peanut Butter: I do not know Compassion, I cannot grant you mercy. However, I do know Thirst for Vengeance!
Peanut Butter fires another energy blast to finish the job, but Waluigi starts smiling maniacally as he creates a portal to intercept the attack. Peanut Butter becomes bamboozled as he thought his opponent lost his powers and does not notice that Waluigi has teleported behind him to grab his staff. Waluigi then tackles Peanut Butter into the portal and the two are transported to a red and black void.
Peanut Butter: This place… where have you taken us?
Waluigi: This is the Rejection Dimension! This is where I reign supreme! This is where you LOSE!
Waluigi then holds up his staff and summons which summons hordes of T-pose zombies that begin to charge at the perfect Bidoof. Peanut Butter does all he can to stop the zombies, using everything is his power to stop them, but the numbers are two great this time and he is suddenly overpowered as the zombies begin to beat him up mercilessly.
Peanut Butter: FOODIB!
A golden light envelops the dimension causing all the T-pose zombies to disappear to places unknown.
Peanut Butter: Do you really think these puppets can stop me?
Waluigi: No, but this can!
Peanut Butter takes notice of Waluigi who took advantage of the zombie attack to charge up a massive ball of electrical energy which he then fires at the perfect Bidoof. Peanut Butter uses his telekinesis to push the ball away, but he starts struggling to hold back the immense power.
Peanut Butter: No… I am the strongest… I must win!
Waluigi: How cute.
Waluigi retaliates with his own telekinesis and pushes the electric ball into Peanut Butter causing a massive explosion. When the explosion clears, Peanut Butter managed to survive, but his body was stiff and his arms were stretched out wide, he had become a T-pose zombie.
Waluigi: Let's wrap this up.
Waluigi hits Peanut Butter with a red lightning bolt causing his body to twist around until Peanut Butter returned to his normal self, however his mind was now under the control of Waluigi.
Waluigi: Now then slave, dispose of yourself!
Peanut Butter: As you wish.
Peanut Butter, unable to control himself, points his hand towards his chest and charges up energy and then proceeds to blast himself with a huge beam of light causing Peanut Butter’s body to disintegrate. When the light clears, all that remains is a golden arm. Waluigi opens a portal and prepares to leave the Rejection Dimension, but not before commenting on his opponent.
Waluigi: You may be perfection, but Waluigi is number one!
K.O!
Peanut Butter’s arm continues to float in the Rejection Dimension. Meanwhile, Waluigi arrives back at the city and sees SMG4’s Deathbus pass by. Waluigi realizes that the deathbus contains his remaining targets and proceeds to chase it.
Results[]
Boomstick: He does realize that he missed the chance to catch a shiny Pokemon, right?
Wiz: Peanut Butter easily the toughest opponent Waluigi has ever faced and he certainly had more destructive potential, but Waluigi had plenty of means to take down the Plump Mouse Pokemon.
Boomstick: Even though both of them had similar abilities, Waluigi had an edge over Peanut Butter. His telekinesis was stronger, he was more proficient with teleportation, and his shapeshifting countered Peanut Butter’s transmutations. Of course, none of those abilities really mattered since Waluigi surefire weapon to claim victory: the T-pose virus. If he could take control of Peanut Butter’s mind, then Waluigi could end the fight however he wanted.
Wiz: And Waluigi had no problem infecting Peanut Butter with the virus. Though Peanut Butter has proven fast enough to achieve escape velocity, it didn’t mean he was fast enough to dodge Waluigi’s lightning, even so Waluigi is capable of overpowering those who are fast enough to dodge lightning like SMG4 and Fishy Boopkins. However, we can’t use speed alone to determine whether Waluigi could land the fatal hit since both Waluigi and Peanut Butter are likely faster than their their highest recordable speed feats.
Boomstick: Fortunately for Waluigi, all that time scheming with Wario has made him an expert at playing others right into his hands, and if pummeling Master Hand proves anything its that Waluigi is more than capable of fighting god-like reality warpers like Peanut Butter. Not to mention Waluigi is tough enough to survive explosions that destroyed entire countries and potentially worse than that, so he can definitely endure Peanut Butter’s attacks long enough to turn the golden Bidoof into a T-pose zombie.
Wiz: Even if Peanut Butter managed to destroy the Staff of Rejection and stop the T-pose virus it didn’t guarantee he would win. Waluigi has demonstrated his durability feats without tapping into his rejection powers and even when the staff was originally destroyed, Waluigi still retained his mind control abilities. Of course it isn’t likely that Peanut Butter would attempt to destroy the staff in the first place due to his more straightforward approach in battle.
Boomstick: Were talking about the guy that blindly followed and obeyed Rusty without question, he clearly isn’t the smartest Pokemon out there.
Wiz: Peanut Butter may have been a powerful opponent, but Waluigi had the superior endurance, cunning, and abilities.
Boomstick: Peanut Butter could only WAH-tch as Waluigi seized the golden opportunity.
Wiz: The winner is Waluigi.
Soundtrack Cover[]
Next Time[]
???: So I got a question for ya. Do you think even the worst person can change...?
The moon is seen up in space before a massive explsion appears and destroys 70% of the moon.
???: That everyone can be a good person, if they just try?
A group of students are then seen firing a series of pink bullets at a smiling squid-like monster who then proceeds to dodge the bullets with incredible speed
???: heh heh heh heh... all right. Well, here's a better question.
A blue eye lights up revealing a smiling skeleton in a blue hoodie
???: Do you wanna have a bad time?
???: Nurufufufufu...
Next Episode: Korosensei vs Sans
| A Legend Reborn | |
|---|---|
| Season | 4 |
| Season Episode | 2 |
| Air date | June 7, 2022 |
| Written by | Professor Mewtwo |
| Episode guide | |
| Previous Zero vs Meta Knight |
Next Cuphead vs Peacock |
Waluigi vs Peanut Butter is a What-If? Death Battle created by Professor Mewtwo. It features Waluigi from the web series series SMG4 pitted against Peanut Butter from the web series Dorkly.
Description[]
SMG4 vs Dorkly! Unstoppable powerhouses from low-level origins. The world underestimated them and paid the price when they unleashed their wrath. But when two apocalypse-activating atrocities meet, will it be Waluigi's Rejection or Peanut Butter's Perfection that ends it all?
Poll[]
Got any roots or bets? Make sure to vote in the discussion poll!
Interlude[]
Wiz: Waluigi, the purple revenger of rejection.
Boomstick: Peanut Butter, the golden pinnacle of perfection.
Wiz: Even the most underestimated beings on the planet can become the mightiest. Under the right circumstances, the weak can become the strong and the omega can become the alpha.
Boomstick: But if you power-up the wrong weakling then all hell will break loose. And these two are the prime examples of that worst case-scenario. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And its our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle.
Waluigi rejects Death Battle![]
Wiz: In the meme-filled world of SMG4, chaos and destruction can be found at every corner, though you’ll be surprised to know there is one place that is actually rather peaceful: the WAA Kingdom.
Boomstick: What the kingdom’s citizens lack in mustache-grooming skills, they make up for by being the nicest people in the world. But no place is perfect and is bound to have a bad apple in the crowd, and that bad apple is named Waluigi.
Wiz: Waluigi’s crimes in the WAA Kingdom were vast and absurd. He committed everything from robbing banks, blowing up homes, farting in church, being too fabulous-
Boomstick: And hi-fiving the mayor, kidnapping him, then sleeping with his husband. After a fiasco like that it’s no wonder the whole kingdom rejected him out of their territory.
Wiz: The first in many rejections that would turn this supposed insignificant criminal into one of the most terrifying beings on the planet.
Boomstick: Exile wasn’t all bad though. Waluigi eventually made it to the Mushroom Kingdom where he reunited with his long-lost brother Wario. Their lust for money and natural d**chiness made them the perfect con-artist duo, scamming everyone in sight and racking up that dough. These two are like a Bonnie and Clyde duo, except they’re siblings… wait I just heard that out loud, I take it back.
Wiz: The Wario Bros are a tricky twosome to deal with, backed up by Waluigi’s cunning wits that has allowed him to outsmart his victims numerous times. Of course, he is rather tenacious too and doesn’t hesitate to bring out the big guns when things get rough.
Boomstick: And he means literal big guns. Handguns, shotguns, tommy guns, and rocket launchers to be precise. He’s even got homing Blue Shells, Bomb-Ombs, exploding spears, and a mech made out of dumpster parts. Also, when Waluigi isn’t raising the kingdom’s crime, he’s running the greatest taco stand in the world. Its theme song alone attracts millions of customers a day and the tacos he makes can be used as a special attack weapon and heal severe wounds like exploded heads.
Wiz: All things considered, Waluigi’s life was actually pretty good, yet deep down he still sought a purpose, feeling as if there was a greater calling for him in life. And what greater calling is there than participating in a fighting tournament featuring the greatest champions in the world: Super Smash Brothers.
Boomstick: Well if they let Byleth into that game, then Waluigi is a shoo-in, right?
Wiz: If only. The head of Smash, Master Hand, was not too keen on letting Waluigi join the roster. To prove his worth, Master Hand asked him what exactly made him unique and unfortunately, Waluigi didn’t possess anything that stood out. Anything he could do, from throwing bombs to dancing, someone else could do better.
Boomstick: Thus Waluigi fell into depression, knowing that he would forever be rejected from Smash and forced to play the role of a second-rate assist trophy. But in the depth of despair, the purple plumber found exactly what he was looking for. Turns out, Waluigi has been rejected so many times over the years that it developed into a godly energy just waiting to be unleashed.
Wiz: This is the dreaded power of rejection. By drawing from his own negative emotions, Waluigi pushes his physical abilities through the roof and unlock several unique abilities which he channels through the Staff of Rejection, a weapon forged from and containing most of his rejection energy.
Popup: While destroying the staff causes Waluigi to lose most of his power, it is technically a manifestation of his rejection. Under the right circumstances, Waluigi should be capable of forging a new one.
Boomstick: He can fly, move things with telekinesis, teleport himself and others, take the cheaper option by making portals, and even implant his rejection on others making them immeasurable feel the pain he constantly feels. It takes only a single energy ball and whoever gets hit will be crying harder than Wiz after he got stood up on a blind date.
Wiz: I told you never to speak of that! However, this merely scratches the surface of Waluigi’s potential. He can convert his rejection energy into solid objects and use it on himself to alter his appearance. This allows him to alter his size to become as large as a building or shapeshift to make brilliant disguises. And should he do it, he can banish them to an endless void called the Rejection Dimension where he can’t practically seal them there until their untimely death.
Boomstick: Even harsher is that the Rejection Dimension has been described as the cosmic friend zone, definitely not the place you want to end up. Waluigi took all these powers and went straight to Master Hand’s office impressing the giant glove with his skills and earning him a spot in the roster.
Wiz: For about 6 seconds that is. Since most of Waluigi’s rejection came from his exclusion from Smash, getting accepted meant losing all his powers and led to him getting rejected all over again. This created a paradox of sorts, Waluigi couldn’t be in Smash without a special ability and getting into Smash would cause him to lose said ability.
Boomstick: Poor b*stard, the universe really screwed him over on that one. But you know you REALLY got screwed over? The whole freakin world because Waluigi was now ready to take his rejection-fueled rage out on it!
Wiz: Since he couldn’t be in the real Smash, he would make the world play his own version of the game. To do this Waluigi tricked the entire Mushroom Kingdom into holding a grudge towards him, which in turn increased the power of his rejection until he achieved a new, all-powerful form.
Boomstick: The mighty Chippendale form. We all knew Waluigi was sexy before, but this is something else.
Wiz: Though even deadlier than Waluigi’s looks was the perfection of a doomsday weapon known as the T-Pose Virus. Normally these viruses are contained within T-Pose Shrooms like this one.
Wiz takes out a T-Pose Shroom.
Boomstick: What are you doing with that? I don’t like where this is going.
Wiz: But should one be caught in its detonation or consume it like so.
Boomstick: Nonono!
Wiz throws the T-Pose Shroom at Boomstick turning him into a T-Pose Zombie.
Wiz: They turn into T-Pose Zombies, lifeless and still beings dead set on killing anyone in sight. The T-Pose Zombies are relentless, able to keep fighting no matter what happens to them, making them seemingly indestructible, and if they do enough damage to an individual that person they will become a T-Pose Zombie as well.
T-Pose Boomstick starts repeatedly tackling Wiz who endures the hits before holding Boomstick back with his hand.
Wiz: Fortunately for anyone trying to escape them, T-Pose zombies are slow and weak on their own. It’s only when they’re in numbers that they truly become a threat.
DUMMI: Sorry to interrupt, but your other test subjects escaped from the closet.
Wiz: They did!? DUMMI quick, activate the cu-
A T-Posed Ringmaster and Jocelyn break in and help Boomstick beat up Wiz.
DUMMI: I could let this go on, though sadly I am not programmed to feel the satisfaction of revenge. Lucky you.
DUMMI fires a 1-UP Mushroom and turns the T-Pose zombies back to normal.
Boomstick: Ooo, my head. Where were we? Oh right, T-Pose. Waluigi can summon these T-Posing Shrooms to hurl at targets or just inject the virus directly with his lightning blasts. And if he needs something tougher than relentless indestructible zombies, he can undo a victim’s T-Pose state while still maintaining control over them, letting him use their unique abilities for his sake.
Popup: The T-Pose Virus can normally be cured with a 1-UP Mushroom, but Waluigi later made an incurable variant that is tied directly to his staff. Only the destruction of his staff can undo this version of the virus.
Wiz: Using this virus to control the Mushroom Kingdom, Waluigi successfully made his own Smash Bros and forced survivors SMG4 and Mario to participate in it for all eternity. Surprisingly, Waluigi’s version of Smash proved to be deadlier and more out of control than the original. It wasn’t just a tournament, it was a War… Of The Fat Italians.
Boomstick: And those two didn’t bother refusing to play. With Waluigi’s power he could easily crush them like ants, especially with his greatest technique: the Waluigi Launcher where he charges up so much energy inside him that it launches him like a missile that sends you straight to hell. This technique usually requires somebody to shove a bomb up his a$$ and launch him, but in his rejection form he can do it naturally saving him from an embarrassing visit to the prostate doctor.
Wiz: Waluigi can punch a car to cloud level in roughly a second, move fast enough to deflect cannon fire, and survive SMG4’s 2 Million Collaboration special: a Spirit Bomb of memes that wiped out the Mushroom Kingdom. Even without his powers, Waluigi is more than what he seems. He was able to carry around Peach’s Castle using only a burlap sack and once outran a Chain Chomp that pursued him around the world.
Boomstick: But when he does go God mode, even the strongest characters in the SMG4-universe struggle to keep up. When Master Hand tried to put a stop to his scheme all Waluigi needed to do was effortlessly stop his punch and break his bones all with a single wave of his hand. The purple menace has also traded blows with the icon of Wii Sports himself: Matt. That guy can outspeed Sonic who caused a global blackout simply by running and bench presses the Earth as a daily workout routine.
Wiz: Based on the distance moved and time it took for Matt to do a full rep, every bench press must have been worth about 783 Yottatons of TNT. Though Waluigi did technically lose, he did manage to stop and tank hits from this guy.
Boomstick: If Waluigi can match a guy that strong then it’s hard to imagine this guy ever losing. SMG4 and Mario weren’t even sure they could take him and those two are powerhouses. SMG4 has dashed from Neptune to the Sun in two seconds by moving over 7400 times the speed of light and Mario can survive a blast that launched him from one galaxy to another.
Wiz: The two are also on par with Meggy who has kept up with Melony in her base form who in turn incapacitated SMG0, a being that powered through an energy beam equivalent to four universes being blasted into him, and Waluigi has actually been considered someone in the same league as these people.
Popup: According to creator Luke Lerdwhichagul’s tier list, Waluigi is at a similar power level as beings like Melony and SMG0. While this could be taken as a joke, the tier list was officially stated to be based on how each major character would perform in battle.
Boomstick: When you’re in the same league as people considered to be gods then you know you hit the big time. Too bad karma always comes back to bite you when least expected. After a cyborg gamer girl got her hands on some of Waluigi’s powers she used it to destroy Waluigi’s staff and break his T-Pose curse.
Wiz: Despite losing his grip on the world, Waluigi didn’t give up. He put up one last fight against SMG4, Mario, and all their friends managing to stalemate them with only a fraction of his power, but since his power came from rejection the heroes knew the only way to stop him was with someone who would accept him regardless of fault or action.
Boomstick: Wario. Turns out being a con artist on your own doesn’t go so well, and Wario realized he needed Waluigi to get through life. With the help of future arc villain SMG3, he got through to Waluigi and convinced him to give up the rejection thus restoring their brotherly love and bringing the kingdom to peace. Don’t look at me like that. I’m not crying, you are!
Wiz: Certainly was heartwarming, but it didn’t end the curse that haunted Waluigi. He would be rejected from Smash Bros for all eternity, constantly carry the negative emotions, and if somebody makes the wrong move, the world may just feel the wrath of Waluigi once again.
Waluigi: … and now that you’re here… IT’S TIME TO SHOW THE WORLD WHAT REJECTION TRULY FEELS LIKE!
SMG4: Why… why are you doing this!? WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY WANT!?!?
Waluigi: Oh SMG4… I just want to play a game…
Waluigi launches a lightning ball that teleports SMG4 and Mario away.
Waluigi: WAHAHAHAHA!
Waluigi then creates a portal to exit the scene himself.
Peanut Butter brings the Bidocalypse to Death Battle![]
Wiz: History has no shortage of terrible, terrible men who would destroy the purity of this world just to satisfy their own ambitions.
Boomstick: Adolf Hitler, Vladimir Putin, Michael Bay, but if you look towards the end of the Book of Evil you might find a ten-year-old boy named Rusty and his ambition was to become the greatest Pokémon Trainer who ever lived. Too bad he was the son of the only reasonable parents in the Pokémon world who forced him to stay home and work at the family deli.
Wiz: But with the aid of a stoner professor, Rusty faked his death and ventured out as an official Pokémon Trainer. Though as it turns out, Rusty had no idea what he was doing and wound up making A LOT of stupid decisions most of them leading to the death of his Pokémon.
Boomstick: He truly is the worst like no one ever was, unlike the mighty EV Trainer who makes the buffest Clefairys in the world. When Rusty crossed paths with this guy, he asked the guy to make him a Pokémon so strong that it could never lose in battle. It’s not like anything could go wrong, right?
Wiz: Spoilers: it does. Through Pokémon Breeding, EV Trainer and Rusty planned to make a Pokémon that was genetically perfect in every way. Six IV, Adamant Nature, and Shiny to be precise. The only flaw with this plan was that the living Pokémon Rusty had on hand were Bidoofs.
Boomstick: Makes sense. Those things are basically everywhere so I doubt Rusty could kill them faster than he could find them. Rusty’s Bidoofs and EV Trainer’s Dittos got busy in one huge pile and then a truck ran them all over faster than it would take me to get into the NFSW details.
Wiz: Presuming that the breeders were now dead, Rusty gave up on making the strongest Pokémon and continued his journey. But little did he realize, there was one survivor amongst the carnage, something stronger than what he was intending to make: a very special Bidoof who possessed the power of a god.
Boomstick: And it would be forever known as the Perfect Bidoof.
Rusty: I’m going to call youuu Peanut Butter!
Boomstick: God*mmit Rusty! See this is why I hate nicknaming Pokémon.
Wiz: Upon his birth, Peanut Butter was clearly destined for greatness, but he wasn’t sure what his purpose was and believed the only person who knew them was his Trainer: Rusty. Peanut Butter tracked Rusty down to a local prison and learned that his duty was to help Rusty accomplish his dream of becoming a Pokémon Master.
Boomstick: He probably should have looked into the fact that Rusty was there for mistreating his Pokémon so badly that they took over the mafia to compensate for their psychological issues, but hey was born 4 episodes ago, he was still young and reckless. Now on a journey to turn the worst Pokémon Trainer into the best Pokémon Trainer, Peanut Butter would really need to pull his weight, which wouldn’t be too hard considering how jacked up he is.
Wiz: For what can only be the most nonsensical reason possible, Peanut Butter’s abilities go far beyond that of a normal Bidoof. Along with his typical Bidoof traits, he also has access to a plethora of unique powers that make him a force to be reckoned with.
Popup: Peanut Butter has the same capabilities as normal Bidoof who are known to be rather agile and have nerves of steel. One particular Bidoof, Bianca, was able to use these abilities to defeat a Rayquaza in 1v1 combat.
Boomstick: He can fly, lift things with telekinesis, turn invisible, create forcefields, and make portals to go virtually anywhere which is ultimately pointless since he can top that by teleporting at will. Of course, Peanut Butter’s favorite ability is his laser beams. Simply by pointing his arm at something, he can decimate whatever he pleases with a golden energy beam.
Wiz: Whether it be brick walls, secret hideouts, enemy Pokémon, Peanut Butter can solve any problem with a single laser blast. In one particular fight Peanut Butter fired a laser strong enough to shake the Earth and make an explosion that could have enveloped the Moon, and that was just a light demonstration of his power.
Boomstick: Yup, get him real mad and Peanut Butter can actually do a lot worse. He can create golden matter to chain you up, turn into energy to go inside you and tear you from the inside out, or use his brutal Bidoof transmutation, turning whatever he zaps into a harmless Bidoof… that he will crush into paste.
Wiz: You think that’s bad? Peanut Butter can make things more gruesome by transforming your organs into Bidoofs and using them to slowly and painfully kill you.
Boomstick: Yeesh! Do you think they turn the corpse into a dam afterwards?
Wiz: What?
Boomstick: You know, like what beavers do. They take a bunch of wood and build a little shelter to live in, it’s kind of cute. I’m pretty sure Bidoof do the same thing, but in this case it would be a meat house instead. It wouldn’t look pretty, though you would be one of the few people to say you own an edible house.
Wiz: Boomstick, there is something very, very wrong with you.
Boomstick: Let’s get back to Peanut Butter. To no surprise, he was mowing the competition no problem and brought Rusty all the way to the Elite Four. After Peanut Butter killed one of the Elites, the other promoted Rusty to their ranks because they were too terrified to fight his golden beaver. I guess that’s one way to make yourself the strongest Trainer out there.
Wiz: But Rusty wasn’t satisfied, and still strove to find ways to prove himself as a Trainer. Thus he and Peanut Butter set out to catch all the Legendary Pokémon. This ended up being Peanut Butter’s first experience at what the world was really like, and what he saw horrified him.
Boomstick: This may come out as a surprise, but humans are d*cks. Many of them tortured or killed Pokémon just for the sheer enjoyment of it and Peanut Butter wasn’t all too happy about it. Knowing something needed to be done, Peanut Butter learned compassion so he could make peace between man and Pokémon. Until Rusty told him to forget that sh*t because it sounded stupid.
Wiz: So with his sense of mercy gone, Peanut Butter resorted to the next best thing: revenge. He betrayed Rusty to pursue a purpose of his own. His new goal was to conquer the world and create a world where Pokémon ruled and mankind suffered for their own subjugation, call it a Bidocolypse if you will. All this because Rusty thought the basic concepts of morality such as kindness and not blindly killing Pokémon was too boring to learn.
Boomstick: That has to be the dumbest decision ever made in the history of dumb decisions, and trust me I’ve made a lot of dumb decisions to compare too.
Wiz: With Peanut Butter’s power, world domination came easily. Within six months, he already had the world in his hands and bound humanity to shackles. Even worse was that Peanut Butter’s power was so great that the only reasonable way to stop him was to prevent him from ever existing in the first place.
Boomstick: So the remnants of humanity took a page from Hot Tub Time Machine and Rusty back to the past to stop himself. It sounds a stupid idea, but Future Rusty actually did the right thing for once and convinced Past Rusty to make sandwiches for the rest of his life. Of course, Future Rusty decided to repeat his mistakes anyways and screwed the whole plan over. Seriously, is there any case scenario where this guy doesn’t cause things to go terribly wrong?
Wiz: Funny you should mention that because the bullsh*t that is time travel ended up making a second Rusty, the one who abandoned Pokémon Training to work at his family's deli. Apparently this Rusty honed his sandwich making skills so well that when Peanut Butter ate one of his sandwhiches, the burst of flavor restored his faith in humanity and ended his bloodlust. That’s right, armageddon was prevented by a sandwich of all things. Realizing the error of his ways, Peanut Butter ended his apocalypse with a single magic word: Foodib.
Boomstick: This is basically “hocus pocus” put on steroids powered by Infinity Stones. The magic Foodib word rewrites reality so that any action performed is instantly undone. In the aftermath of the first Foodib, there was no sign of the Bidocolypse Peanut Butter caused and as a precaution, he chained the original Rusty to a deli so he would never cause another one to happen. Good call on that one, PB.
Wiz: And with godhood abandoned, Peanut Butter took to the stars to see what other wonders lay out there and what else could be in store for him. Upon departing for his cosmic quest, Peanut Butter disappeared from the Pokémon world, never to be seen again… or so everyone thought.
Boomstick: Turns out the big wigs at Dorkly weren’t quite done with Peanut Butter yet so they pulled him back to Earth for a new quest: to win back his girlfriend Bianca from his evil twin Bad Bidoof, but you can just call him Badoof. This all took place in a different series about Pokédex entries being literal, but that doesn’t matter since everything in Dorkly is essentially connected to one big universe.
Popup: There are several instances where different Dorkly series interact with one another, implying that they all exist in the same universe. This would also imply that Peanut Butter can potentially scale to Pokémon from outside the Pokémon Rusty series.
Wiz: This series really showed just how dangerous Pokémon can be, and as a being that conquered the Pokémon world with ease, Peanut Butter should scale to these Pokémon like Rapidash who ran so fast that the ground caught fire, or Dugtrio, who I kid you not, moved tectonic plates miles below the surface of the Earth by taking a crap.
Boomstick: Heck a random Ditto could easily turn into the Sun and burn everything in front of him. Really makes you wonder how anyone survives in the Pokémon world, though they do have those machines that resurrect the dead so that might explain it.
Wiz: Granted, you don’t need to run comparisons to know powerful Peanut Butter really is. He moved fast enough to achieve escape velocity, survived the vacuum of space, killed a legendary Suicune in one hit, and tracked down every Trainer in the Kanto region and stole their badges from them. The golden beaver has proven to be such an incredible specimen, that Kevin, a man whose intellect goes far beyond human comprehension was willing to lend his wisdom to Peanut Butter because he was deemed an essential to the Dorkly universe.
Boomstick: Plus it was better to side with him rather than against him. Red made that mistake when he formed a team of the world’s most advanced Trainers to stop Peanut Butter and got his a$$ friend instantly. That was no easy feat for Peanut Butter either considering some Pokémon Trainers have Arceus on their team. You know, the Pokémon who created the universe!?
Popup: Though Peanut Butter had never been seen fighting Arceus, Safari Marge has stated that legendary Pokémon like Arcues are not significantly more powerful than other common Pokémon. Peanut Butter’s victory over the world’s strongest trainers also suggest he possesses this high level of power as even common Trainers have been shown to have Arceus on hand.
Wiz: That would mean that Peanut Butter surpasses this level of power, which is absolutely insane to think about. Because of this, Peanut Butter has had very few enemies that could provide a reasonable challenge. Only Badoof, his virtual equal, had managed to push him to his limits.
Boomstick: And right before we got that dream fight of the century, a stupid owl flew in and convinced them to put aside their differences to fight capitalism or whatever. It’s amazing that someone this powerful can be stopped by the biggest bullsh*t in existence. We better get a god*mm third Peanut Butter arc to make up for this.
Wiz: You can pray to any god you want, perhaps even Peanut Butter himself, for that glorious return, but be warned. Should this perfect Pokémon’s wrath be incurred once again, then abandon all hope of victory for there is only on true champion of the Pokémon world and his name is Peanut Butter.
Peanut Butter: Fear not mortals, soon you shall all be one with Bidoof. Which is my cute little way of saying dead.
Death Battle![]
Warning: Contains spoilers for my previous Death Battles
Tell me, have you ever heard of Waluigi’s Taco Stand? It is perhaps one of the greatest providers of Mexican food in existence, and it’s all run by one man: Waluigi. For years this magnificent man has satisfied millions of customers, but that doesn’t mean it is all sunshine and rainbows. There were occasions when a troublesome customer would appear and cause Waluigi serious issues ranging from attempted taco robbery to eating him alive. And at the current moment, Waluigi was dealing with one of those troublesome customers.
Deadpool: What do you mean my money is no good here!?
A certain fourth-wall breaker in spandex was standing in front of the stand, looking Waluigi directly in the eye as he waved pieces of green paper in his face.
Deadpool: Let me explain this to you. This is Franklin, and what Franklin wants, Franklin gets. And what Franklin wants is for you to give me some d*mn tacos! So fork those tacos over!
Waluigi: Sir, your creepy old man photos do not count as money. Besides, this Taco Stand only accepts gold coins.
Deadpool: You mean those things that come out of the floating blocks that are literally everywhere meaning anyone can get their hands on them, no problem? Yeah, that's a profitable system… if you’re trying to bring the economy to a new low! Waluigi: If you think it’s so easy then go get the coins yourself!
Deadpool: Well in the words of Thanos: Fine, I’ll do it myself!
Deadpool walked towards a floating brick that was conveniently placed near the Taco Stand and tried to punch it open. He probably would have had better luck throwing another punch at Colossus because upon immediately hitting the brick, all the bones in his hand shattered.
Deadpool: OH GOD THAT HURTS! THEY MAKE IT LOOK SO EASY IN THE GAMES!
Waluigi: WAHAHAHA! You stupid!
Deadpool turned towards the taco salesman with an angry look in his eyes. The Merc with a Mouth had reached his last straw and was now ready to do something drastic (and very stupid) as he walked up to the Taco Stand once again.
Deadpool: That’s it! I will not be mocked by some overrated Nintendo side character! I may not have coins, but I do have THIS gold!
Deadpool reached into what I’m hoping is his back pocket and pulled out a severed golden arm which he stole from the Metropolis Museum of History and Science then slammed it on the stand.
Waluigi: Wait, isn’t that…
Deadpool: But wait there’s more!
The Merc with a Mouth pulled out another item. This time it was a 1-UP Mushroom and his plans for it were pretty clear.
Waluigi: NO DON’T DO IT! NO NO NO!
Deadpool: It’s time for a Death Battleeeeeeeeee! With some legit research this time.
HEY!
Before I could give Deadpool a piece of my mind, he slammed the mushroom into the golden arm and it began to glow. Waluigi was forced to protect his eyes from the light and when it faded, a familiar figure stood before him. It was a large, golden, anthropomorphic, speedo-wearing, “Oh no he’s hot” level of sexy, Bidoof, but you can just call him Peanut Butter. Not long after his return, Peanut Butter looked down and saw Waluigi with his eyes popped out and jaw dropped.
Peanut Butter: Ah, if it isn’t the man who zombified my father. I have waited many years for this moment.
Waluigi: Ah sh-
Waluigi didn’t even get to finish his curse because Peanut Butter immediately grabbed him by the throat, strangling the purple plumber as he housed him up.
Peanut Butter: And I am going to enjoy doing this again.
Peanut Butter charged up energy into his free hand and used it to strike Waluigi with a powerful punch, sending him flying into a building that exploded upon impact. The golden Bidoof wasn’t done yet as he teleported to intercept Waluigi with a hammer strike, spiking his target into the ground so hard that it turned the city block into a crater. Following it up with a few laser blasts, Peanut Butter made extra sure his opponent would stay down, and it worked. Waluigi was left in a cartoonishly beaten shape and covered in ash and fire. He got up slowly though it wouldn’t do him much good since Peanut Butter was floating down to finish the job.
Peanut Butter: Pathetic. You were once a worthy opponent, but look at you now. Your strength, magic staff, and incredibly sexy six-pack have all been taken from you. It would seem fate has rejected you in your most dire moment, as it should.
Waluigi: Rejected? Did you say fate “rejected” me?
Upon hearing the words that had caused him so much pain over the years, Waluigi gave an unsettling smile and an ominous blue glow emitted from his eyes.
Peanut Butter: Now, it is time that you become one with Bidoof.
Peanut Butter threw another punch with the intention of shattering Waluigi’s skull, but to his surprise his opponent caught the punch and let out a purple aura from his body.
Waluigi: You don’t know anything about rejection. Allow me to teach it to you!
The purple aura enveloped Waluigi and soon he was dawning a new look. Purple bandanna, staff in hand, and an incredibly sexy six-pack. All this came from Waluigi’s reawakened power of rejection which he used to throw Peanut Butter into the air before flying up to join him.
The golden Bidoof stopped himself in midair and got a proper look at his transformed opponent. He unleashed a golden aura to match Waluigi’s purple one indicating that he was ready to brawl.
Peanut Butter: I see you were holding back, but no matter. I will still claim my vengeance and your prize money. So let our rematch begin, mustached man!
FIGHT!
Peanut Butter was the first to make a move as he zoomed in to deliver a powerful punch. Waluigi used his staff to block the blow and pushed his opponent away before trying to hit him with lightning blasts from his staff. The golden Bidoof effortlessly dodged the bolts making Waluigi angry, leading to the latter charging at the former and tackling him through several buildings. As a result of the attack, the buildings fell down and exploded setting the whole city on fire thus turning the peaceful environment into a traumatizing war zone all while the catalyst of the tragedy watched.
Deadpool: I did a good thing today… well for the readers that is, everyone else is f*cked. Whelp, off to the strip club.
Back to the action, Waluigi was running out of buildings to bash Peanut Butter’s face into so he grabbed his opponent by the head and slammed it into the concrete, continuing his flight path as he used Peanut Butter to tear open the Earth. Unfortunately, this did little to faze Peanut Butter who decided to make a counterattack by teleporting out of Waluigi’s grasp and appearing behind him to grab the plumber’s leg and throw him away.
Waluigi crashed into one of the few buildings that was still standing and recovered quickly. Peanut Butter knew that attack wouldn’t do much so he used his telekinesis to lift the surrounding rubble and aim it at his target.
Peanut Butter: Let us see how you handle this Rock Slide attack.
The Bidoof yeeted the rubble at Waluigi with the force of a meteor shower. Knowing that there was no chance of dodging, Waluigi instead chose to use the attack to his advantage. He activated his own telekinesis to stop the rubble right before it hit him and threw it back at his attacker. Peanut Butter didn’t hesitate from this and held out his arm to fire a golden laser that tore through the rubble and blasted Waluigi in the face hard enough to concuss him.
Waluigi: Galeem? Is that you?
This gave Peanut Butter the opening he needed to telekinetically draw Waluigi in close and launch him into space with a powerful uppercut. As the plumber left the atmosphere, he regained his senses and saw that he was about to collide into a space station that looked like Theodore Roosevelt’s face.
Eggman: I’m not gonna pi$$ on the Earth. I’m gonna go higher! I’m pi$$ing on the MOOOON!
Inside that space station, Eggman was about to destroy the Moon because Shadow the Hedgehog was being a b*tch-a$$ something something, but his plans came to a halt when he heard something he thought wasn’t possible to hear: a man screaming in space.
Waluigi: WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Eggman: Da f*ck is that?
By the time Eggman found the source of the screaming it was too late. Waluigi struck the space station dead center causing it to get blown to pieces. Waluigi managed to survive the blast and shook his head as he tried to get a good view of his new surroundings. There wasn’t a lot in sight, though his main concern was Peanut Butter who did not appear to be anywhere nearby.
However, that was far from true as a portal opened up behind the plumber and from it emerged the golden beaver cracking his knuckles. Peanut Butter threw the punch with all his might, but was caught off guard when Waluigi suddenly turned around and caught it.
Waluigi: Is that it? How cute.
Waluigi decided to show his enemy what a real punch looked like and delivered a deadly jab to his stomach. This knocked the wind out of Peanut Butter and sent him all the way to Neptune, attracting a bunch of aliens with his crash landing. Said aliens stared at the beaver in confusion for a little bit before they heard something zoom overhead and turned around to look at it instead.
Alien: Hey look! It’s that guy who gave us tacos that one time! And he didn't bring those blue and green a$$holes! Got any more tacos for us?
Waluigi: No, but I got something even better.
Other Alien: Well then, let us have it.
And let them have it he did. Waluigi shot out a series of lightning bolts that struck all the aliens and stiffened their bodies with blank expressions and arms held out. The unfortunate extraterrestrials had now become T-Pose Zombies under Waluigi’s command.
Waluigi: Now my minions, SKIN THAT RODENT!
The T-Pose Zombies did as instructed and pounced on Peanut Butter right as he was getting up. They started beating him up as best as they could with their crippled bodies, but against someone of godly power it was only a matter of time before their target pushed them all away using his voluptuous muscles.
Peanut Butter: That attack was not very effective.
Waluigi: Don’t worry, we are just getting started.
Peanut Butter: We?
Peanut Butter was a bit confused by what Waluigi meant, but then he remembered that the T-Pose Zombies can’t be taken out so easily. He looked around to see that the aliens he had pushed away were getting up with no signs of damage and inched forward to continue their assault. One of them tried to get the first strike and sped towards Peanut Butter, yet all it managed to touch was Peanut Butter’s fist as the Bidoof used it to propel it into the cosmos.
The others came in one by one and Peanut Butter tried keeping them far away by striking them with powerful laser blasts. This was working at first until he blasted one away only to see Waluigi appear from behind it. Waluigi rushed at Peanut Butter in a split second and smacked his face with his staff. He continued beating Peanut Butter using his weapon, but the golden Bidoof eventually had enough and used a forcefield to deflect the attack before punching Waluigi a dozen feet away.
Peanut Butter followed it up with a powerful laser from his right hand, but Waluigi wasn’t going to let that hit. The plumber saw one of his T-Pose Zombies standing next to him and grabbed him to use as a shield. Said zombie took the blow perfectly, although it was now looking extra crispy. Waluigi discarded that zombie and went on to mock his opponent.
Waluigi: More of the same cheap tricks. You’re starting to bore me, rodent.
Peanut Butter: I could say the same to you, human. How about we stop holding back.
Waluigi: Fine by me. I’ve been looking for an excuse to go all out.
The two glared at each other intensely, both wanting to prove that they were stronger than the other. Waluigi and Peanut Butter let the tension hold for a while then proceeded to charge at each other. They curled up their fists and threw their punches which collided perfectly. The power of their collision was so intense that the fabric of space-time was torn apart, creating a wormhole that sucked the two in and sent them to the other end of the multiverse.
Meanwhile, in a sweaty nerd’s basement…
Sweaty Nerd: What the f*ck! Those two can’t teleport to other parts of the multiverse, that is bullsh*t! You can’t just make up new powers because you’re desperate for a plot device, that’s lazy writing! And while we’re on the subject, why have you resorted to tabbers for the last two fights!? Did you really run out of original ideas because you suck so badly!? Professor Mewtwo, you really the godd*m worst writer in-
A portal opened up in the basement and out came the Mystery Machine to run the sweaty nerd over.
???: I told you we should have turned left at Albuquerque.
???: Give me a break, everybody takes a wrong turn at Albuquerque.
The Mystery Machine then went through another portal so that the story could focus on the actual fight again.
The wormhole spat out the two in the airspace (or whatever you call it) of the Underground, catching them both by surprise.
Peanut Butter: I did not Fly to this location. Where have you taken us?
Waluigi: Don’t look at me! This is all your fault!
Waluigi threw a lighting bolt from his staff in anger, but Peanut Butter teleported away and reappeared right above Waluigi. He cupped his hands together Kamehameha-style and unleashed a big laser blast that knocked Waluigi to the ground below. His crash landing attracted the attention of several Monsters who gathered around him to see what happened.
Monster: Is that a human?
Undyne: Perfect! We can kill him and bring his soul to Asgore!
The aggressive sounding fish lady, Undyne, raised her spear and prepared to skewer Waluigi’s heart out. However, the plumber reacted just a bit faster and shot out a bolt of lighting to turn Undyne into a T-Pose Zombie quickly letting the other monsters know what was going on.
Other Monster: He’s on a Genocide run! Quick everyone, scream and panic!
The monsters screamed like girls and ran around in circles. That made it all the more easier for Waluigi to zap them into T-Pose Zombies as well. He then lifted his new army into the air with telekinesis and faced Peanut Butter once again. Using his telekinesis, Waluigi lifted his army into the air and threw them at Peanut Butter like darts. The gold Bidoof had no trouble dodging those projectiles which then hit the ceiling of the Underground and got their heads lodged in it.
Peanut Butter: Such a wasted endeavor.
Waluigi: Don’t get your hopes up. I’m not done yet!
Waluigi fired another lightning bolt from his staff, but this time it was red-colored. Peanut Butter dodged the bolt, making it hit the T-Posed Undyne stuck in the ceiling.
Peanut Butter: You missed.
Waluigi: Oh, did I?
Undyne began to move her body again, until she was fed from her T-Pose state. However, she remained under Waluigi’s control and now had the urge to kill Peanut Butter. She forged a blue spear in her hand and plunged at the golden Bidoof as if he were a generously ambiguous child.
Undyne: Here I come!!!
The fish lady struck Peanut Butter right in the back and the two plummeted to the ground below where a random gift kiosk layed.
Customer Monster: So not to question your business or whatever, but what’s with all the yellow smiley faces? You got shirts with smiley faces, hats with smiley faces, plungers with smiley faces… I’m not even going to bother questioning that last one.
Salesman Monster (and no it’s not Spamton): Well you see a few years ago this squid-man with a smiley face came by the Underground and he bought a lot of souvenirs from my kiosk. I heard he was also a dangerous creature who commited a lot of murders, but I thought he was pretty cool so I decided to make a whole merch line based on him.
Customer Monster: Your inspiration for an unimaginative smiley-faced merchandise was based on a random squid that walked by?
Salesman Monster: That’s right.
Customer Monster: You sure anything else didn’t come to mind. You know like h-
Peanut Butter crashed into the kiosk and killed the monsters right before I got in trouble for writing that. Undyne, who was on top of him, jumped off and pointed her spear at the golden Bidoof in intimidation.
Undyne: En garde!
Peanut Butter: Bidoof.
Peanut Butter waved his hand at Undyne and her eyes and mouth were turned into tiny Bidoofs that ate her alive.
Undyne: Nyaaaaaa!
Undyne’s lifeforce was drained quickly and Peanut Butter ensured that her death was quick by disintegrating the rest of her body with a laser. Of course, Peanut Butter knew that was the least of his problems because Waluigi was now charging at him. The plumber tried to land a punch, but Peanut Butter dodged at the last second and flew away to get some distance.
Waluigi made chase and even with Peanut Butter blasting lasers to keep him away, the plumber was not losing any distance. The two entered the quiet town of Snowdin where Waluigi found some more unexpected monsters he could use. He wasted not a moment zapping them into T-Pose Zombies then snapped his fingers to issue a command.
At their master’s command, the T-Pose Zombies huddled together to form a massive wall that stood in the way of Peanut Butter’s flight path. This did not faze the golden Bidoof who simply turned around, jumped off a T-Posed Donald Trump, and propelled himself in Waluigi’s direction.
Waluigi: What the-
Peanut Butter rammed into Waluigi and the two ended up flying away from Snowdin so fast that they turned into a flash of purple and gold. Waluigi didn’t let that attack slow him down and threw a series of punches at his opponent who did the same in retaliation. They were so focused on their evenly-matched blitz that they lost control of where they were going and their flash ended up going skywards.
It eventually broke through the ceiling and reached the surface where a futuristic city awaited. Above that city was a weird battleship with bat wings and a mask on its bow. Waluigi and Peanut Butter unintentionally flew towards it during their clash and broke into it. They zoomed right into the ship’s reactor and shattered it to pieces before breaking out of the ship and leaving. The only witnesses to this were two swordsmen who were unfortunately having their duel inside the now dying ship.
Meta Knight: …What was that?
Zero: …I don’t know.
The flash that is Waluigi and Peanut Butter continued rocketing to the skies until it reached the depths of space. There Waluigi stopped throwing punches and flew out of his enemy’s striking range causing Peanut Butter to throw a missed swing and give the plumber an opening.
Waluigi: I hope you’re hungry! Special Attack Time!!!
Waluigi put on his sombrero and pulled out a giant taco. His restaurant’s theme song played as he smacked Peanut Butter so hard that it launched him at speeds fast enough to trigger the lazy plot device and create a wormhole for him to fall through. Peanut Butter felt cold-hard steel hit his back as he landed in another universe and saw that he was now on a moving vehicle.
Vehicle driver: Folks, we appear to be experiencing some minor turbulence. Please stay calm, fasten your seatbelts, and enjoy the flight.
Co-vehicle driver: We’re on a train dumba$$!
On that train, Peanut Butter got up and rubbed his sore back. The taco’s power was more than he expected and he needed a moment to recover.
Peanut Butter: That attack was… super effective…
He would get no respite however as Waluigi also went through the wormhole to continue agonizing his foe.
Waluigi: Having fun? How about we invite more to the party!
Waluigi shot a lightning bolt upwards to create a portal. From that portal, dozens of Underground monsters poured onto Peanut Butter who was now forced to fend them off. The golden Bidoof wasn’t the only one annoyed by the zombie outbreak as the constant “thud” noises on the roof caught the attention of a certain gangster who stuck his head out the window to see what was happening.
Mista: What is going on out there?
Mista looked at the top of the train and saw a bunch of weird monsters forming a huge pile. He wasn’t sure what they were doing until he heard their target say something bada$$.
Peanut Butter: Bidoof.
Peanut Butter’s magic word transformed all the surrounding T-Pose Zombies into Bidoofs allowing him to effortlessly push them aside. This was by far the most bizarre thing Mista had ever seen, and that was really saying something.
Mista: I need to stop riding trains. Let’s get this over with.
Mista took out his gun and took aim at Peanut Butter, intending to bust a cap in his mouth.
Mista: Get him, Sex Pistols!
Mista shot out a bullet with the sextext that made up his Stand riding the bullet.
Sex Pistol #1: We’ll end this in one shot, boys! Aim!
The Sex Pistols jumped off the bullet and kicked it simultaniously, thus increasing it’s speed and power. Said bullet appeared like it was going to blow the unsuspecting Peanut Butter’s brains out, but little did Mista know Peanut Butter was completely suspecting it and moved his head by an inch to dodge the attack.
Mista: What!? He dodged it!?
Granted, the bullet didn’t completely miss as it struck a new airborne target right in his “Pingas”.
Waluigi: WAAAALLELUGJAH! WAAAALLELUGJAH! WALLELUGJAH! WALLELUGJAH! WAAAALUIGI!
Waluigi fell onto the train and mourned the loss of his nuts. This would have been the perfect opportunity for Peanut Butter to deal a killing blow if there wasn’t a more concerning matter at hand.
Peanut Butter: It appears man’s cruelty prompts them to even harm their own kind. Such a wretched existence. But fear not, I shall spare you all from this fate by making you one with Bidoof.
Peanut Butter flew up and charged up a lot of energy in his hand and the ground began to shake from its intensity. Both Waluigi and Mista were witnessing this and while the former still couldn’t speak due to the pain, the latter realized that they were very screwed.
Mista: Ah sh-
The golden Bidoof fired his laser and destroyed the train along with everything on it… well almost everything. Waluigi survived the blast and was sent flying about 6042 miles away. His soon to be destination was a rooftop with a single basketball hoop where a lone tanooki girl was shooting hoops.
Michiru: Hmm… maybe I should teach other Beastmen how to play basketball. It gets kind of boring when there isn’t anyone to practice my skills with.
And now to the part you’ve all been waiting for: the one where Waluigi crashes into the basketball hoop and gets stuck in it.
Michiru: What the? What is that?
Peanut Butter: I believe it is what humans call: a three-pointer.
Michiru turned around to see a golden-furred Beastman descend from the sky, leaving her even more confused about what was going on.
Peanut Butter: Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to retrieve my ball.
Peanut Butter floated towards Waluigi who tried to get away, but found that his efforts were in vain as he was stuck inside the basketball hoop.
Waluigi: No no no! Stay away!
Obviously, that plea fell on deaf ears as Peanut Butter yanked the hoop and Waluigi off the rim and prepared to throw it like a football.
Peanut Butter: As they say in basketball, go long!
Ok, so technically Peanut Butter doesn’t understand sports because he never played any, but who cares. What’s important is that Peanut Butter yeeted Waluigi across the planet again then prepared to fly after him to induce further harm. However, he did not realize that Michiru had grabbed onto his shoulder in an attempt to get his attention.
Michiru: Excuse me sir, do you mind explaining what the heck is going o-
Michiru was cut off by Peanut Butter blasting off at high speeds with her still holding on. The golden Bidoof didn’t even notice his passenger, especially when he stopped in the middle of the ocean and caused the Beastman to lose her grip and fly out even further. She eventually landed on top of a building and got up to see a new city that looked like a post-apocalyptic world that had been overrun by mutants.
Michiru: What the? Where am I?
But that’s a different story, let’s continue with this one. The reason Peanut Butter stopped was because he saw a ship with a lion for a head, and on it was the dazed Waluigi. Peanut Butter was about to fly down to meet his target when he saw a man in a straw hat approach the plumber along with his crewmates.
Luffy: Ooo… Something just landed on our ship!
Zoro: Careful, Luffy! It might be an enemy!
Waluigi got up, shaking off his concussion and saw the people surrounding him.
Waluigi: Where did all this anime come from!?
Before anyone could answer, golden beams rained down from the sky forcing the Straw Hat Pirates to jump out of the way and make room for the attacker, Peanut Butter, to land on the ship.
Peanut Butter: You are a tenacious one, but this has gone on long enough.
Peanut Butter fired a laser directly at Waluigi only for the latter to use teleportation to escape the attack and the hoop confining him. The plumber reappeared behind Peanut Butter and raised his staff so that it could shoot lightning in all directions. It wasn’t enough to hit the agile Peanut Butter, though it did catch the Straw Hats by surprise and turn them into T-Pose Zombies.
???: What the!?
The gasp of surprise made Waluigi turn around to see that there was one pirate still standing: a girl with long orange hair and staff in hand a.k.a Nami.
Waluigi: Looks like I missed one!
Waluigi tried shooting lightning at Nami, but she proved faster than she looked and deflected the bolts with her staff. The pirate girl knew she couldn’t win a head-on battle so she decided to call for help by bringing out a living cloud from her staff.
Nami: Come out, Zeus!
Zeus: I’m here for you, Nami!
Nami swung her staff around and Zeus followed her movements as he charged up electricity. Waluigi knew that this next attack would be deadly if it hit, and so did Peanut Butter who prompted to do something about it.
Nami: Zeus Breeze Tempo!
Nami swung her staff towards the intruders and Zeus flew at them at high speeds. But right before the attack could land, a portal opened up and swallowed Zeus whole.
Nami: No way! That’s not possible!
Zeus: Nami, look out!
The pirate girl turned around to find the other end of the portal and Zeus coming out of it. Zeus tried to slow down to avoid harming his master, but still hit her anyways causing a big electrical explosion. Fortunately, Nami survived, but she was heavily injured and the one who created the portal, Peanut Butter, was now approaching her.
Peanut Butter: Did you really think your Pokémon stood a chance against me?
Nami: I guess not, but maybe this will stand a chance!
Nami reached in her pockets and pulled out a green orb which she activated and pointed at Peanut Butter. The golden Bidoof tried to figure out what she was doing, but it was too late. A clock appeared on his chest and rotated for a bit before stopping which in turn made Peanut Butter stop in place too.
Nami: That should hold him.
Though Nami thought she was safe, she forgot about the other intruder on board who jumped right in front of her and scared her half to death.
Waluigi: Thanks for the help! I’ll take it from here!
Putting his staff aside, Waluigi started blitzing Peanut Butter’s frozen body like a cyborg trying to beat up a manly senator. It didn’t look like anything was happening, but in reality Waluigi was actually storing up damage so that the pain would all go off at once when Nami’s Stop spell wore off.
And that moment did come shortly afterwards. The freezing effect ended and Peanut Butter’s body started moving again. Feeling all of Waluigi’s blows at once, the Golden Bidoof was knocked back with such intensity that he broke the time-space continuum again and flew through another newly-generated wormhole. Waluigi took his staff and made chase to ensure his opponent would not escape in the next universe.
It was shortly afterwards that a Pokémon was finally defeated. That’s right, the battle was finally over and the one lying motionless was… Pidgeot! What did you think I was talking about Waluigi vs Peanut Butter? Of course not! I still have 9-10 fights left to reference and I haven’t even done any of Season 2!
Ahem… Said Pokemon belonged to everyone’s favorite a$$hole Blue and the one who defeated the bird was the mighty Satsuki Kiryūin. Blue returned his fainted Pokémon to its Pokéball and acknowledged his opponent’s strength.
Blue: Not bad. I can see how you managed to beat the Elite Four.
Satsuki: They were worthy opponents, but there is no one in this world who can defeat me.
Blue: We’ll see about that. Let’s see how you handle this Pokémon.
Blue threw his next Pokéball and a bright flash covered the area. When the flash cleared, Satsuki saw a golden Bidoof in the arena and assumed that it belonged to Blue.
Satsuki: So this is your next Pokémon. Perhaps he’ll put up more of a fight.
Blue: Umm… that’s not the Pokémon I sent out…
Satsuki was a bit confused at first, but then she looked down to see her actual opponent (and was frankly disappointed by it).
Shuckle: Haha yeah! Good Ol’ Shuckle is finally in a Death Battle! I bet my fight will be so awesome that they make it an official episode!
Blue, Satsuki, and Peanut Butter ignored Shuckle and tried to make sense of their situation, but then Peanut Butter heard something coming and knew he had to prepare quickly.
Waluigi: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Peanut Butter: Hmph. Predictable.
Waluigi burst into the room and Peanut Butter flew in to intercept him. Both of them tackled each other with equal intensity and then began bouncing all over the room constantly trying to land a hit on one another. Their movements got faster and stronger causing the world around them to shake.
Blue started running to find a safe space while Satsuki held her sword up in an attempt to stay on guard. The latter made the right call as Waluigi and Peanut Butter soon crashed into her and the force of the blow once again broke reality and sent the three flying through a wormhole leaving only the shocked Blue and idiot Shuckle left.
Shuckle: Oh my god… Shuckle wins! Yeah!
The trio teleported to an alternate version of Honnōji Academy, but the momentum of the attack had slowed down. However, Satsuki did fly off from the collision just as Waluigi’s and Peanut Butter’s attack opened yet another wormhole that they flew into. Satsuki landed on top of the academy and got up to see a woman in red effortlessly beating up her One-Star students. Once the woman finished the job, she turned to Satuski as if to challenge her.
Jeanne: Your men certainly know how to throw a welcoming party, but shouldn’t the host be the one to entertain their guest?
Satuski wasn’t entirely sure what was going on, but this woman was attacking her academy and she knew what she had to do.
Satsuki: Very well then…
Satuski summoned a flight of stairs so that she could walk down them and face her new opponent.
Satsuki: I’ll “entertain” you grovel at my feet once this is over. Life Fiber Override!
The Tour de Gods took our main characters to the lovely city of Paris where the two stopped their prolonged dimension-shattering tackle. Waluigi tried to use the distance to his advantage by firing some lightning bolts, but Peanut Butter protected himself with a forcefield. The golden Bidoof then took notice of the Eiffel Tower behind his opponent and got an idea. He used his telekinesis to lift the tower from the ground them threw it right into Waluigi’s-
Waluigi: WAAAH!
Peanut Butter: Critical hit.
Waluigi: You’ll pay for that!
Waluigi dislodged the Eiffel Tower and used it like a hammer to smack Peanut Butter to the ground. He then flew down to pursue his opponent causing a giant explosion upon reaching him. These actions did not go unnoticed as the city’s local superheroes were watching this from a nearby rooftop.
Cat Noir: These Akumas are getting weirder and weirder. What’s next? A genie with magic dancing powers?
Ladybug: Uhh… Let’s just say that’s already been done… Anyways, we need to stop these two before they cause any more damage! Lucky Charm!
Ladybug threw her yo-yo into the air and small ladybugs came out to form an envelope with a certain emblem on it.
Ladybug: A letter?
Cat Noir: What is the plan here, m’lady? Give them an invitation to a fancy party?
Ladybug tried to think of a plan, but little did she realize that the letter set off Waluigi’s Smash senses and he stopped attacking Peanut Butter to confront the heroes on the roof.
Waluigi: Spider-Girl! Give that to me!
Ladybug: Wait, what?
Waluigi punched Ladybug and sent her flying while also knocking the letter out of her hands. He immediately grabbed the letter and got so happy that his rejection form wore off.
Waluigi: I finally did it! I got into Smash!
In the midst of this happiness, Waluigi almost failed to notice the looming shadow coming over him. He turned around and remembered that he was supposed to be fighting Peanut Butter and now lacked the means to do so.
Peanut Butter: Congratulations.
Waluigi: Oh son of a-
Peanut Butter blasted him with a giant golden laser that disintegrated the letter that sent Waluigi flying all the way to another country. Peanut Butter teleported to where he expected Waluigi to land, leaving only Cat Noir to ponder about what had happened.
Cat Noir: I guess that takes care of it. What was so special about that letter anyways?
Meanwhile in Soviet Russia, a giant octopus man with a green salad thing on his shoulder was fighting a three-headed dragon with a teenage girl on his shoulders.
Fishy Boopkins: Why won’t you leave me alone? I just wanted to go to the anime store!
Alice: I won’t allow a monster like you to roam freely! I heard what you did to the Krusty Krab!
Fishy Boopkins: What? But that was an accident!
The giant octopus man, who is Boopkins’s father, got mad at that accusation and swatted Hydranoid, the three-headed dragon away. Hydranoid made a quick recovery and used his wings to take to the skies where he readied himself for his next attack.
Hydranoid: Come on, Alice! We’ll destroy him just like we did that spandex-wearing freak!
Alice: Ability activate! Death Trident!
Hydranoid charged up a trio of energy balls in his mouth, but before he could fire Peanut Butter teleported right above him. The golden Bidoof saw Waluigi flying towards him and redirected him downwards with a Polish Hammer. This caused Waluigi to strike Hydranoid right in the back and send him and Alice down to Earth along with the living projectile. The damage dealt was too much for Hydranoid forcing him back into ball form as he landed right next to Alice.
Alice: Oh no! Hydranoid!
Waluigi: My… my Smash invitation…
Alice looked at the purple-clad man in front of her and saw that he was upset. Boopkins and his dad did the same, but knowing who it was both were more cautious about it.
Fishy Boopkins: Is that Waluigi?
Waluigi: I’LL MAKE YOU SUFFER FOR THAT!
Waluigi became so enraged that it restored his rejection form and gave off an aura more intense than ever before. Boopkins’s father realized he and his son were in danger and ran off before they became part of the next Waluigi Apocalypse.
Joe Boopkins: NopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNope!
Turning his attention to the fiend who destroyed his invite, Waluigi let Peanut Butter know how much trouble he was now in.
Waluigi: You destroyed the most important thing to me! You brought me into the furthest depths of rejection and now you will pay for your insolence! Your death will be a thousand times worse than last time! It will shake Heaven and Earth with the sheer magnitude of pain I shall bring! And you will know the true power of W-
Suddenly, the Mystery Machine appeared from beyond space and time to ram Waluigi into another dimension. This left behind a wormhole that Peanut Butter stared at in anger.
Peanut Butter: That is my enemy! No machine is allowed to harm that which I will leave unable to battle!
Peanut Butter flew through the wormhole and tried to catch up to the Mystery Machine within the void between worlds. He almost managed to grab the backdoor and yank it open when he saw Waluigi fall off the windshield and into a portal that led to a warehouse. The golden Bidoof refused to let his target get away so he chased after him, allowing the Mystery Machine to continue its journey.
???: Was that the guy we were looking for?
???: Oh yes! Those magnificent abs couldn’t belong to anyone else.
???: Crap! Now we have to turn around! It’s going to take forever to catch up to those two!
???: Oh, before we keep going, can we make a stop by the universe where there’s nothing, but Buc-ee’s stores first? I have to make a visit to the Tinkle Fairy if you know what I mean.
Inside the warehouse, Peanut Butter searched for his opponent, but shortly after the plumber arrived, he went into hiding. The ravaged state of the warehouse didn’t help either as there were crates recklessly scattered everywhere. Heck, even the roof of the place looked like it would slide off at any second.
Peanut Butter: I know you did not run, mustache man! Show yourself and face your demise!
Peanut Butter soon heard something behind him and turned around to immediately start blasting lasers. He hit a humanoid-like figure with every blast and sent it to the ground drenched in flames.
Peanut Butter: Finally! You have been defeated!
Unfortunately, when Peanut Butter got a closer look at the figure, it turned out to be some Mafia bird man whose body had been sliced to pieces, yet with a crude attempt to put him back together. This frustrated Peanut Butter because it reminded him of the incident at the castle all those years ago.
Peanut Butter: Not this again…
Waluigi: Looks like the dummy was outsmarted by a dummy!
Peanut Butter turned around again to see Waluigi in the air with a rocket launcher. The plumber did not waste a moment as he pulled the trigger and watched the rocket fly and drench his enemy in a huge explosion. When the dust cleared, there was nothing left where the blast had occurred so Waluigi flew down to inspect the area.
Waluigi: Did the blast actually get him? I thought the stupid rodent was tougher than this.
Waluigi was indeed correct. Peanut Butter didn’t explode, but rather turned invisible and hid behind some crates. Seeing his opponent vulnerable prompted the golden Beaver to come out from his hiding place and trap Waluigi in a choke hold.
Peanut Butter: Tell me, who is the dummy now?
Waluigi couldn’t answer that since his life was being strangled out of him, yet that didn’t stop him from taking out his staff and using it to whack Peanut Butter in the “Pingas” (again).
Peanut Butter: That’s it! I’m turning you into a pelt!
Peanut Butter let go of Waluigi and hit him in the face with a sucker punch. I’d explain to you how hard that punch was, but I think we all know where this is going so let’s skip to the part where they are in another universe.
At a random caste, Princess Ami and her friends Agni and Deva were walking down the halls discussing a very serious issue.
Agni: I’m telling you, it’s the perfect plan. All I’m asking is for one of you to do me a small favor to help pull it off.
Deva: For the last time, we are not sneaking cameras into the girls locker room!
Ami: *Shakes head in disapproval*
Agni: Oh come on! What’s the worst that could happen?
This seems like the perfect time for Waluigi to crash in and ruin things, which he did. He rammed into Agni and the two flew into a wall.
Deva: Something like that, but instead you get hit by Marlow’s foot.
Waluigi got himself out of the wall and took a look at his surroundings. It was weird that everyone had big colorful eyes, but Waluigi had been practically everywhere today and seen some sh*t so it didn’t bother him. What did bother him was Peanut Butter’s sudden entrance which caused everyone to panic… expect the person too dazed to notice.
Agni: Did anyone get the name of that bus?
Acting quickly, Waluigi zapped Agni into a T-Pose Zombie and grabbed him by the legs to use as a weapon. Peanut Butter was able to block the swings then swat Agni out of Waluigi’s hands. He proceeded to repeatedly punch Waluigi in the face until he was sent flying then used telekeneisis to stop him and fling him across the room, shoving him into wall after wall.
This onslaught came to a stop when Peanut Butter was stuck in the behind by a glowing arrow.
Peanut Butter: What is this attack?
The arrow worked its magic and stunned Peanut Butter completely, giving the attacker, Ami, and her friend enough time to retaliate.
Deva: I’ll handle this.
Deva used her ice powers to encase Peanut Butter’s body in ice. The combination of stun and freeze prevented the golden Bidoof from making any further movements.
Deva: That should hold him. Now what about the other guy?
Waluigi: OUT OF MY WAY!
Ami and Deva dodged some unexpected lightning blasts and saw that they had been fired from Waluigi who was also charging at Peanut Butter. He tackled the golden Bidoof into a wall and raised his fist with the intention to finish off his opponent.
Waluigi: I’ll get rid of you for good this time! No more interference!
But the third to last interference cut in when a sword tied to a ribbon wrapped around Waluigi’s arm and halted his attack. Waluigi, Ami, and Deva all turned around to see who threw it and it happened to be the mysterious cat girl Ami met in the woods a while back.
Deva: Blake!
Blake: We came as soon as we heard the castle shake.
Blake tugged back on her ribbon and threw Waluigi back, sending him flying towards another surprise challenger: a silent boy with white hair and a black visor.
Blake: All yours, Geo!
Geo curled up his fist and hit Waluigi hard enough to propel him in the opposite direction. Elsewhere, the stun effect on Peanut Butter had just worn off and he used his regained mobility to break out of his icy cocoon.
Peanut Butter: Free at last! Now where is my opponent?
Peanut Butter’s opponent was knocked right into him and the two were yeeted out of the castle and into town. The two landed right in the center and though Peanut Butter was once again stunned by the blow, Waluigi got up no problem and saw the huge crowd of people gathering around them.
Waluigi: This couldn’t be more perfect.
Waluigi took his staff and flew around the city zapping anyone he could find. After about half a minute, Peanut Butter came to his senses and saw that Waluigi now had an army of dozens, no hundreds of T-Posed Teorans surrounding the Perfect Bidoof.
Waluigi: Looks like Waluigi is the winner!
Peanut Butter: Don’t be so arrogant. A Pokémon of my level could easily wipe out this army.
It was then a green portal opened and out came a cop with an axe. Said cop raised his axe and made a thousand more axe blades come out in order to decapitate all the T-Pose Zombies.
Waluigi: What the? That’s not even possible!? What kind of five-year-old logic allows you to-
Axe Cop heard Waluigi’s ranting and decided to shut him up by dashing over to chop this staff holding arm off.
Waluigi: WAAAAAAAA! MY ARM!
Waluigi fell to the ground screaming as he grabbed the nub where his hand once laid. Peanut Butter thought he just got a lucky break and went over to thank his supposed ally.
Peanut Butter: Thank you stranger. You have my gratitude for-
Peanut Butter was unexpectedly interrupted when the axe cop tried to decapitate him forcing the golden Bidoof to jump back.
Peanut Butter: What is this madness!?
Axe Cop: You bad guys have been wreaking havoc across the multiverse. I’m to kill you before you do anymore damage.
Peanut Butter: Your intentions are noble. It is a shame that it is all based on a death wish.
Peanut Butter decided to grant Axe Cop’s death wish by blasting him with a hundred lasers that made explosions big enough to reach the moon. One would think that Axe Cop would be long dead, but nothing can stop that man as proven when he emerged from the explosion and got into murdering distance of Peanut Butter.
Axe Cop: I’LL CHOP YOUR HEAD OFF!
The golden Bidoof needed a plan fast. Something that would get rid of the cop and get him to safety. With little options and even littler time, Peanut Butter brought out his last resort to remedy this situation.
Peanut Butter: FOODIB!
Peanut Butter word’s enveloped the environment in a huge golden glow and it became impossible to tell what had happened or what was going to happen next.
Peanut Butter found himself back at the Taco Stand where the fight started, no Axe Cop, no T-Pose Zombies, no nothing. Waluigi was there too, having both his arms back and being strangled in his normal form by the golden Bidoof.
Peanut Butter: Much better.
Waluigi: I… disagree…
Waluigi buffed himself up again and kicked Peanut Butter off him. The two were about to make a repeat of their previous mistake when Waluigi spoke up to stop it.
Waluigi: Hold it! If we do this here some random character might show up again and intervene in our fight. We need to take this somewhere with more solitude.
Peanut Butter: I couldn’t agree more. Let us commence our final battle in a proper arena.
Waluigi: Excellent.
Waluigi snapped his fingers and the two were teleported to the Final Destination. Nothing was there but a floating platform, the empty void of space, and the two gods staring intensely at each other.
Waluigi: Do you like this place? This is where you shall die for good. And no a$$holes-
Suddenly Eternamax Eternatus jumped up from behind and let out a huge ro- Nevermind, Waluigi telekinetically crushed Eternatus and threw him aside faster than I could narrate it.
Waluigi: AND NO A$$HOLES WILL JUMP IN!
Peanut Butter: Very well then, but I will not be the one who dies here…
Peanut Butter teleported right up to Waluigi catching the plumber by surprise.
Peanut Butter: That would be you!
The golden Bidoof delivered a mighty uppercut to Waluigi‘s jaw, sending him dozens of feet into the air. Waluigi recovered and brought out his staff to hit Peanut Butter with lightning, yet his opponent was able to dodge as he flew closer to him. Peanut Butter prepared to throw another punch at Waluigi only for the plumber to teleport out of the way.
He saw Waluigi appear right next to him and tried blasting a laser at him, but Waluigi teleported again and repeated the process by repeatedly appearing nearby then disappearing when Peanut Butter attacked. Waluigi even did some mocking dances and gestures to enrage the golden Bidoof.
Peanut Butter: Stay still and fight you coward!
Waluigi reappeared right above Peanut Butter with his legs curled up for an attack.
Waluigi: If you insist.
Waluigi thrusted his legs down, dealing a double kick that launched Peanut Butter into Final’s Destination’s platform, splitting it in half. The plumber followed it up by using telekinesis to crush Peanut Butter with the two halves of the stadium. Though Waluigi couldn’t see it, his attack had failed as Peanut Butter used a force field to save himself from harm. He then converted the forcefield into a burst of energy that reduced Final Destination to rubble, leaving Waluigi frustrated that his attack had failed so miserably.
Waluigi: Stubborn fool!
Waluigi blasted the air with lightning and out spawned various T-Pose Zombies that were created throughout the multiverse.
Waluigi: Get him!
The T-Pose Zombies charged at Peanut Butter, quickly surrounding and ganging up on him. However, Peanut Butter didn’t take a single hit from them because he turned himself into energy and slipped past his attackers while also making his way to Waluigi. He rematerialized right behind the plumber and blasted him with a laser, propelling him into his own zombies and knocking them down like bowling pins.
The plumber would not give up on his attack as he commanded his T-Pose Zombies to continue charging at their target. Peanut Butter tried blasting them with more lasers (cause lasers are his thing) and managed to knock them away, yet had no luck in actually damaging them. Waluigi took advantage of this by getting behind one of the zombies and ramming him through one of Peanut Butter’s lasers allowing him to get in close on Peanut Butter and deliver a flurry of blows. Once the golden Bidoof looked battered down, Waluigi raised his staff and charged up the energy he needed for a killing blow.
Waluigi: That’s game, rodent!
But in an instant, Peanut Butter showed a flash in his eyes and got a second wind. He teleported out of the way right as Waluigi fired his attack and reappeared behind him again, though instead of another laser he decided to yank Waluigi’s staff right out of his hands.
Waluigi: What the!?
Peanut Butter crushed the staff with his bare hands, destroying most of Waluigi’s rejection powers. This freed the T-Pose Zombies from Waluigi’s control and made the normally electric-filled eyes of the rejected plumber dim down to their normal state.
Waluigi: My powers!
Peanut Butter: How unfortunate.
Peanut Butter winded up his fist and let out a punch that launched Waluigi so hard he caught fire. He zoomed past the ex-T-Pose Zombies and singed them into skeletons. The plumber was going so fast that it restarted the dimension hopping by forming a wormhole for him to go through. This time he landed on the Moon and made the biggest crater ever seen on it.
The golden Bidoof wasn’t too far behind either. He flew to his opponent and beat him further into the celestial body with no intention of stopping until his opponent’s face was beaten to a pulp.
Peanut Butter: You thought a mere staff could give you the power to defeat me? I have evolved further beyond any Pokémon, any human! Someone like you could never hope to compete with power like mine! I am a god, and you are a mere, insignificant speck in this universe!
Peanut Butter let out his rage as he insulted Waluigi with every punch, but that may have been the biggest mistake of his life. Every insult fueled Waluigi’s feelings of rejection, reminding him of the pain he suffered over the years… and he loved it.
Waluigi: Yes! More! Berate me! REJECT ME!
Waluigi became more resilient to the punches, each one doing less damage than the last. His eyes turned blue with lightning, restoring him to his fully rejected state and now that he was at his peak, he had little trouble catching Peanut Butter’s first and stopping his assault.
Waluigi: Because it will be all the more satisfying when I pay you back tenfold!
The plumber used his other hand to form a ball of electricity and thrusted it into Peanut Butter’s chest. Suddenly, the golden Bidoof felt a kind of despair he had never experienced before. He felt loneliness, hopelessness, insecurity. It was like the whole world turned its back on him when he needed it most, it was the feeling of rejection.
Peanut Butter: This pain… I took no damage, yet my heart has been torn in two… What is this wretched feeling?
Waluigi: This is the feeling I felt my whole life, but don’t worry. I’ll make it go away!
Waluigi punched Peanut Butter off the moon causing him to drift into space, feeling too rejected to make any movements that could save him. The plumber then tucked himself in and concentrated his energy into the attack that would settle things once and for all.
Waluigi: WALUIGI LAUNCHER!
Waluigi leaped off the moon as a beam of purple energy. That purple energy hit Peanut Butter right in his broken heart and shoved him all the way down to Earth. The two made an impact on the planet that shook both it and the Heavens. It also made a gargantuan explosion that at its tiniest point looked like a small spark in the galaxy.
At the crash site, only Waluigi stood in the center. The rest was nothing but scorched and broken Earth for thousands of miles. As for Peanut Butter, well let’s just say there wasn’t an arm or any other body part that Deadpool could revive him from anymore. Now that his enemy was vanquished once again, Waluigi looked to the sky and reminded everyone who he was.
Waluigi: Waluigi is still number one!
K.O!
But wait, there’s more!
The Mystery Machine came out of a surprise wormhole, catching Waluigi by surprise. He saw an alien, a mayor, a talking dog, and one sexy-looking man exit the vehicle to confront him.
Professor Mewtwo: Hold it right there! We, The Super Mystery Force, are here to stop your crimes against the multiverse!
Adam West: Now eat Batarang you fiend!
Adam West chucked his Batarang at Waluigi which harmlessly bounced off him.
Waluigi: Ok! I have had enough of this today!
Waluigi fired blasts of lightning from his hands that the Super Mystery Force barely managed to dodge and saw the big craters the bolts left behind. It was then the Super Mystery Force realized how screwed they were.
Dogbert: I told you we needed a better plan than this.
Professor Mewtwo: Shut up! The plan I wrote in the crown three minutes ago was flawless.
Dogbert: All you did was make a picture of you punching the bad guy in the face.
Professor Mewtwo: Like I said, flawless!
The Super Mystery Force was interrupted by another lightning bolt and saw that Waluigi was now even closer to them.
Waluigi: Any last words before I kill you?
Professor Mewtwo: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…
All seemed lost until the girl of the Super Mystery Force came out of the van and asked a question.
Cofi: Can I have some vegetarian tacos, extra jalapeno?
Waluigi stared at her for a moment then snapped his fingers causing a huge flash. The other men on the scene thought they were going to die, but then saw that Waluigi was back to normal and right behind his Taco Stand.
Waluigi: Of course! Always happy to serve a customer! Anyone else want something?
Professor Mewtwo: Huh? Mystery solved I guess. Let’s get ourselves some victory tacos, gang!
Zarbon: Can I have some extra sour cream on mine? *moans loudly*
The Super Mystery Force got in line to get their delicious tacos. And everyone lived happily ever after.
The End
Results[]
Boomstick: You know, I could go for a taco too. Hey Wiz, you want to head to that Mexican food truck after this?
Wiz: Sure, why not. Anyways, Peanut Butter was perhaps the toughest opponent Waluigi ever fought. His raw power and unique abilities certainly kept the rejected Smash fighter on edge. However, no matter how many times you run the numbers, Waluigi was simply at a much higher class.
Boomstick: Waluigi could easily match anything Peanut Butter had, like how his shapeshifting could undo Peanut Butter’s Bidoofing Beams. Plus while Peanut Butter had some impressive telekinesis and teleportation skills, Waluigi had those same abilities and demonstrated much more efficiency in their application and power.
Wiz: More importantly, Waluigi’s signature T-Pose virus meant if given the opportunity, he could win in a single hit via taking control of Peanut Butter. And even if that failed, it didn’t mean Waluigi was out of options as he still overshadowed the perfect Pokémon.
Popup: Peanut Butter’s reality warping could theoretically undo any T-Pose Zombies Waluigi makes. Granted, this does not stop Waluigi from simply making more and he has fought similar reality warpers like Master Hand in the past.
Boomstick: Let’s talk speed first. Peanut Butter may have spent that long journey traveling between planets, but Waluigi can outpace SMG4 who crossed a solar system in 2 seconds. Sure, Peanut Butter could potentially be faster though without any way to measure the distance he flew or time taken to get there, that really just boils down to speculation. Besides, power was Peanut Butter’s tool of trade and it’s hard to argue with when he’s stronger than the creator of the universe, Arceus. That was the only Waluigi needed a work around for if he was going to skin that beaver.
Popup: In Pokémon Yule Log, Peanut Butter once made a portal to Earth rather than make the flight there. This could imply that he does not rely solely on flight for interplanetary travel.
Wiz: The power of perfection is staggering to say the least, yet the power of rejection was even greater. Recall that Waluigi matched SMG4 and his friends while in a weakened state. This group includes Meggy, who is equal to base form Melony who had enough power to fatally injure SMG0.
Boomstick: The monster who overpowered a blast worth four universes at once. That should reasonably put Waluigi four times stronger than Peanut Butter, right?
Wiz: Perhaps, but in the Dorkly universe, Arceus has been owned by common Pokémon Trainers. They should be reasonably weaker than higher-class Trainers like Red and Peanut Butter crushed a whole resistance of those top tier Trainers. This means that Peanut Butter’s true power could be much greater, albeit this applies to Waluigi considering Meggy was only one of the people fighting Waluigi at that time and plenty of the other characters could fight with a similar power level as hers.
Popup: Assuming that Luke’s tier list holds true, Waluigi’s power can confirmably be beyond 4 times universe level when scaling to SMG0 who was later able to fight on par with a much stronger version of Melony. SMG0 should also be superior to SMG1 and SMG2 whose combined power destroyed a box containing thousands of universes.
Boomstick: Don’t forget, Peanut Butter only ever had to push himself in battle once. He spent so long fighting opponents that couldn’t fight back that he lacked real combat experience, unlike Waluigi who consistently had to fight with gods and armies that could match them. And if he’s tanked hits from those guys, then Peanut Butter was going to have a real hard time landing a killing blow.
Wiz: There’s last thing we should address here, and that’s intelligence.
Boomstick: Aagh! Wiz, I get that your nerd stuff solves problems or whatever, but brains can’t be the answer to everything.
Wiz: Actually in this case it is. Peanut Butter did have power, but he was an idiot. He was in constant need of guidance from others, made reckless decisions without thinking, and of all things he listened to Rusty, a living catalyst of stupidity and destruction. In contrast, Waluigi may have played second fiddle to Wario by helping with scams, but that still meant he had years of experience outwitting and manipulating people. His takeover of the Mushroom Kingdom even proves that on his own he can be a very dangerous tactician. When putting the two together, it’s clear that Waluigi would always have control of the fight. No matter what advantage Peanut Butter had, Waluigi would always be able to compensate for it since he was more strategic, allowing him to find counters much quicker.
Boomstick: I guess that’s the long way of saying Waluigi was playing Peanut Butter from the start.
Wiz: Peanut Butter is a god among Pokémon and then some, but Waluigi’s rejection powers and intellect proved that even the most rejected can overcome that which has been perfected.
Boomstick: Now you know that when Waluigi “Wah”-nts the win, you better give it to him or else you’ll be mashed into “Peanut Butter”.
Wiz: The winner is Waluigi.
Soundtrack Cover[]
Special Thanks to Joshbry23 and HeyIt'sHoi for the Soundtrack Cover
Next Time[]
The Soul Collecting Cup!
The Skullgirl Seeking Cyborg!
Next Time: Cuphead vs Peacock!