Description[]
Dorkly vs SML!!! Which video series Pokemon Trainer shall prove they are the very....worst?
Interlude[]
Wiz: Pocket Monsters... Very much like our animal companions in real life, but very different. We are meant to be kind to these creatures and always make sure they are happy... Some people, however, are much to oblivious to realise that their way of treating their Pokemon is completey horrid.
Boomstick: Rusty, the farsighted impresionable Pokemon trainer.
Wiz: And Bowser Junior, SuperMarioLogan's resident Pokemon trainer.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their Pokemon, Badges and Companions to see who would win a Death Battle.
Rusty[]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cxu-txNoiXc
Wiz: Born in a random, run down town known as Beige Town, where a young farsighted boy named Rusty was born to......work at his family's deli.
Boomstick: Yeah, though he went to a good school and was properly raised by his loving parents, he's still dumb as hell. In fact, he's also kind of a HUGE ass.
Wiz: Rusty aspired to be a Pokemon Master, even following the Kanto Champion Red on Twitter, as well as dressing up exactly like him.
Boomstick: One day, however, when going to deliver the local professor his lunch, he noticed a Kakuna on the professor's desk. And so he named it Pikachu, grabbed it, told the professor, named Professor Tree, to tell his parents that he was dead.
Wiz: And so begun the journey of a soon to be Pokemon Murderer.
Boomstick: Rusty began catching all sorts of Pokemon, while trying to get his Kakuna to evolve.
Wiz: Such as throwing rocks at it, tossing it at other Pokemon and yelling at it.
Boomstick: However, LUCKILY for the poor little Kakuna, Team Rocket showed up and stole his Pokemon. Which now included....mostly nearly or already dead creatures. They were a bunch of Bidoof stuffed in one Pokeball, a Bulbasaur with no bulb, which is it's source of life, which died soon after, and 3 Zubat. Also Pikachu, which evolved out of pure happiness when one grunt touched it.
Wiz: Afterwards, Rusty was picked up by his dad after calling him out of fear, but the two crashed into a Snorlax. Rusty caught the Snorlax, and his injured Dad, then healed them at the Pokemon Center. However, he left with only Snorlax and another Pokemon, with his healed dad heading home.
Boomstick: Later on, Rusty began catching many other Pokemon, earning only ONE "Gym Badge", until he heard of the Viridian City Gym Leader and Team Rocket Boss which turned out to be......
Wiz: Pikachu.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7WuLoajK9Y
Boomstick: Afterwards, the police caught Beedrill and his grunts trying to kill Rusty, who Pikachu HATED.
Wiz: The police wondered who could've raised such a horrible Pokemon, until Rusty revealed he was the one who raised Pikachu. So he was instantly arrested for the rest of his life.
Boomstick: But that probably wasn't the end of his journey. Unfortunately.
Wiz: Rusty, despite having killed several, does have some Pokemon.
Boomstick: The first being Snorlax, which can crush any Pokemon with it's sheer weight, though it doesn't know many attacks. Even so, it DID survive a car slamming directly into it.
Wiz: He also has a Geodude, who hates him, but is very strong, able to easily lift and throw humans.
Boomstick: Another one is Paras, which he calls Mushroom Bug, who only knows one move, Flash, which blinds opponents.
Wiz: His last Pokemon is a Zubat, which is low leveled, and can't really fight at all.
Boomstick: That's really it for Rusty, other then having a seashell, which Blaine gave to him as a "Gym Badge".
Wiz: However, he does have a companion, known as EV Trainer, who is actually named Julian. He is obsessed in creating so-called "Perfect Pokemon".
Boomstick: EV Trainer has many Ditto, which he uses to breed with other Pokemon, but they do only known Transform.
Wiz: Some of them fused with Rusty's Bidoofs to become the perfect Bidoof, which he probably has in his possession.
Boomstick: That is really is basically done for Rusty. His only real feats are being the worst Pokemon Trainer ever as well as being Number One on Kanto's most wanted.
Wiz: Some of his weaknesses include being extremely stupid, a crybaby and also having very unreliable Pokemon.
Boomstick: Yeah, you could probably solo this guy with your Bulbasaur. And that plant frog thingy sucks.
Rusty: I'm not a recruit, I'm a RUSTY!
Bowser Junior[]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3cEBa4fzj8
Wiz: Very rarely, when someone makes a wish, it may come true. And that is the case for Bowser's son, Bowser Junior, who had wished for Pokemon... to become real.
Boomstick: So, when he woke up, Bowser Jr was surprised to find out that he was supposed to go get his first Pokemon. Not wanting to waste time, the turtle ran outside... and couldn't find the place for like 8 hours.
Wiz: When he did get there, the son of the Koopa King was given a Bulbasaur, much to his disappointment. So he started his journey, along with his Magikoopa friend Cody, to find his favourite Pokemon ever, a Poliwhirl and take on the gym leaders.
Boomstick: While on this journey, Junior knew that to accomplish his goals we would have to raise several different powerful Pokemon, including his Bulbasaur.
Wiz: After several hard battles, Bulbasaur eventually evolved into Ivysaur, becoming much stronger and much more skilled.
Boomstick: And don't forget more ugly.
Wiz: His Ivysaur knows five moves,: Solar Beam, Razor Leaf, Sleep Powder, Tackle and Vine Whip, all which Junior has become surprisingly good at using.
Boomstick: Not to mention this thing was flamethrowered and thunderbolted more times then I can count, and survived.
Wiz: Later on, whilst battling Ash Ketchum, the reptile won and decided to take the 10 year old's Pikachu for himself.
Boomstick: What level is this thing a- LEVEL 100!?!? The hell?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVpchXgr7JQ
Wiz: Yes, apparently Ash had trained his starter so much, that it reached it's maximum level and became powerful enough to oneshot almost any Pokemon.
Boomstick: And it seems to only know one move, which is Thunderbolt. It also has a REALLY badass voice.
Pikachu(Macho): PIKA PI!!!
Wiz: Lastly, Junior has a Pidgeotto, which was able to beat his Ivysaur. It knows Peck, and presumably Gust.
Boomstick: Also, he did battle a gym leader and get the cooking badge, and has 4 wins under his belt.
Wiz: His friend, Cody, is also a good trainer, having a Wartortle, who is homosexual and claustrophobic, who knows Water Gun and Bubble, a Bellsprout which knows Vine Whip and Wrap, and finally a Butterfree. Who was oneshotted by a single Water Gun and hasn't shown to know any moves.
Boomstick: Other then that, Bowser Jr has been shown to be a relatively inexperienced trainer and gets anxious and confused when one of his Pokemon is in trouble.
Wiz: Still, this youtube reptile has enough determination and motivation to, one day, capture a Poliwhirl.
Bowser Jr: COME ON IVYSAUR, LET'S KICK THIS PIDGEOTTO'S BUTT!
Fight[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, it's time to end this debate once and for all.
Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle!
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOWRNLaCMJg
Junior: Joseph! I challenge you to a Pokemon battle!
The reptillian Pokemon trainer had just spotted his rival, a Koopa named Joseph. However, once coming closer to the other trainer, he saw the boy's Charmeleon and Sandshre laying on the ground, fainted, bruised and bloody.
Joseph: I can't Jr, I battled this trainer just a minute ago, and his friend's really strong Pokemon and his Snorlax wrecked my entire team.
Junior was intrigued. Joseph was, in actuallity, the strongest trainer he knew. And someone beat him? Easily? Wait, if he beat the guy that beat Joseph...
Junior: I KNOW! I'm gonna beat that guy! And show YOU that I'm stronger!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9muEDfU7yp0
Junior tossed out a Pokeball, his Pidgeotto coming out and starting to flap his wings, lifting himself into the air. Junior jumped onto the bird Pokemon and started to fly off, before noticing his companion, Cody, was following far behind.
Junior: CODY! HURRY UP! YOU GOTTA WATCH ME BEAT THIS SUPER STRONG POKEMON TRAINER!
Cody looked up at Junior, a confused look planted on his face, but decided to shrug it off and release his Butterfree, jumping onto it and flying after Junior, who was already a mile away.
But there was one problem in the turtle's plan. He didn't know where this trainer was, so he was basically just flying around looking for Pokemon trainers, only to find almost no one...
Except for a red capped boy and a blue haired man.
Junior: HEY, SCRUBS! Have you guys seen any super strong trainers around here?
Little did SML's poster boy know that he had just encountered the trainer known as Rusty, and his friend EV Trainer.
Rusty: Why yes, young trainer! I am an incredibly strong trainer! My name is Rusty! And this is my friend, EV Trainer.
I think he just said what I stated.
Whatever.
Anyways, it turned out that Rusty and the EV Trainer had managed to wipe out Joseph's team... by having Rusty's Snorlax sit on them.
Junior: LAME! Listen here scrub, I wanna prove to Joseph that I'm stronger then him, so that means...
Junior hopped off his Flying type and pointed at the to-be prisoner, his Pigeotto flying in front of him and glaring at the boy.
Junior: I challenge you to a Pokemon Battle!
Cody had just arrived at the scene, standing next to his friend and looking at Rusty and the EV Trainer nervously.
Rusty: Alright then! I choose you, Geodude!
The rock type Pokemon was released from it's Pokeball and got into a fighting position before turning around and punching the boy in his face, then turned back.
Junior: (Did that Geodude just punch his trainer?)
FIGHT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPbl6o9mGEs
Jr: Pidgeotto, use Peck!
The aviary monster flew at Geodude and stabbed it's beak into Geodude's head, which didn't phase the Rock type in the slightest.
Rusty: Use Rock Throw, Geodude!
Geodude looked around, found a rock, and tossed it directly into Pidgeotto's face, instantly knocking out the bird and returning the Pokemon back to it's Pokeball.
Jr: W-what? He's out already? No fair!!! GO, IVYSAUR!
Out popped Jr's starter Pokemon, who got into a fighting stance and growled at the boulder with arms.
Jr: Use Razor Leaf!
The stupid Pokemon summoned several leaves behind him, then sent them flying at Geodude, who tried to defend himself only for his arms to be pushed back before the leaves struck him directly in the face.
Rusty: Oh no! Geodude, quick, use Rock Smash!
The rocky creature rolled towards Ivysaur then punched it right in the face, making the amphibian stumble back.
Jr: Stop SUCKING, Ivysaur! Use... uh, Solar Beam!
Ivysaur looked back at Jr and nodded, then started glowing bright yellow, charging up his strongest attack.
Rusty: Now is our chance! Use Strength!
Geodude decided to stop listening to the stupid trainer and jumped onto Rusty's face, repeatedly punching the boy in his face.
Rusty: Geodude, stop! We must work together!
With the enemy distracted, Ivysaur launched his sun charged blast directly at Geodude, whose trainer noticed the attack, pulled Geodude off of him and use the Rock type as a shield.
Rusty: SHIELD ME, GEODUDE!
After the attack ended, Geodude was shown to be nothing but ash that Rusty was holding in front of him.
Rusty: Geodude? Where did you go? Whatever, go Paras and Zubat!
Rusty threw out a single Pokeball, with two Pokemon coming out of it, both of them being squished together and breathing heavily. The two of them separated, gasping for air.
Jr: Why did you put two Pokemon in one Pokeball? That's mean!
Rusty: And cheap!
Jr: I don't care! Ivysaur, use Tackle!
Ivysaur: Iva-SWAUR!
The starter Pokemon ran at Paras, and slammed directly into it, knocking the parasitic monster far back.
Rusty: Paras is in trouble! Zubat, help him!
Zubat simply continued flapping it's wings, so Ivysaur used Vine Ship to grab Zubat.
Jr: Yeah, way to go, Ivysaur! Now slam it on the ground!
Jr's first Pokemon nodded and smashed the Poison type right into the ground, turning Zubat into a bloody mess.
Rusty: Zubat noooo! Paras, avenge him!
The "Mushroom Bug" ran at Ivysaur and used flash, blinding the Pokemon. Ivysaur started running around blindly before he eventually crashed into a tree and fainted from pain.
Jr: Oh shit! I'm down to my last Pokemon... Go Pikachu!
Rusty: PIKACHU!?!?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDFEUfS4r_A
Much to Rusty's surprise, a bright yellow, adorable mouse creature with a lightning bolt tail was sent out and exclaimed it's mighty cry.
Rusty: OH MY GOD! Hey, when I beat you, I call dibs on that!
Jr: Ha, sure thing, scrub!
Pikachu instantly sent out a Thunderbolt, which hit Paras directly in it's head, causing it to exploded into itty bitty pieces of orange goo.
Rusty: Oh crud.... Luckily, I have another Pokemon! Go, SNORLAX!
And out came the fat beast known as Snorlax, who roared directly into Pikachu face.
Rusty: Now use Body Slam!
The Normal type jumped high into the air and aimed it's body at Jr's strongest Pokemon. It was closing in on the electric type mascot, but right before it landed...
Cody: Use Water Gun!
A high pressured blast of water was sent directly into Snorlax's stomach, knocking the beast backwards and making it fall over.
Rusty: What?
Wartortle and Pikachu began running at Snorlax, charging up their attacks, but a muscular Bidoof ran in front of Snorlax and smacked them away.
EV Trainer: Don't worry, Rusty! Me and my perfect Bidoof will aid you in this battle.
Rusty: Thanks, buddy.
Both teams ran at each other, but before they collided, Pikachu began charging up a Thunderbolt, and released it right when they did clash, resulting in the entire area becoming surrounded in a white light.
And then it cleared up...
Snorlax's head was shown emerging from the smoke and let out a mighty roar, before falling to the ground, showing that it had a giant hole in it's stomach.
Next, Bidoof was shown laying on the ground, fainted, before Cody and Wartortle started teabagging it. Bowser Junior and Pikachu looked around, not seeing Rusty or the EV Trainer, only seeing a pair of glasses and a red cap laying on the ground, with ash surrounding it.
K.O!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7P8XEFtObDw
Jr: Hey Cody, what happened to that Bidoof?
Cody blushed before laughing nervously.
Cody: He, uh, choked to death.
Jr: On what?
Cody: You don't wanna know.
Results[]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TU3wEquqpcE
Boomstick: Thank god, he's dead.
Wiz: Let's start by comparing their Pokemon. Paras and Zubat were no match for Ivysaur, Pikachu and Pidgeotto, but Paras' Flash attack could prove a problem for Ivysaur and Pidgeotto since they are inexperienced.
Boomstick: As for Geodude, Ivysaur's grass attacks could handle that little abomination. Snorlax, on the other hand, was surperior to all of Jr's Pokemon except for Pikachu, who could most likely two shot Snorlax.
Wiz: With their companions, Cody was much smarter then the EV Trainer, and his Wartortle could beat Bidoof considering, even though it has perfect Ivs... it's still a Bidoof.
Boomstick: Finally, let's compare the trainers. Jr may be inexperienced, but his Pokemon are not only stronger then Rusty's, but he actually treats them with respect and takes care of the, which not only makes your bond with a Pokemon better, but it makes the Pokemon themselves stronger too.
Wiz: So in the end, it was obvious to see who would win.
Boomstick: Rusty always wanted to be like Red... now he's just Ash.
Wiz: The winner is Bowser Junior.
Next Time[]
Boomstick: Next time, on Death Battle!