Rodan vs Birdon
Rodan vs Birdon is a What-If Death Battle
Description[]
Godzilla vs Ultraman: Two of the most powerful monsters of the skies battle for supremacy!
Interlude[]
Wiz: Kaiju are most definitely one of the most deadly creatures in fiction, some being able to destroy entire armies single-handedly.
Boomstick: Yeah, humans are usually pretty screwed when giant monsters show up, but at least we have one advantage: they're sooooooo slow!
Wiz: Some are, yes, but that's hardly the case for these two titans of the sky.
Boomstick: Rodan, the fire demon.
Wiz: And Birdon, the volcano bird monster.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a death battle.
Rodan[]
Wiz: After the first Godzilla appeared in 1954, the world was forever changed. Due to the horrors of nuclear war, humanity had a new threat: giant monsters.
Boomstick: Yeah, and get used to seeing them because after Godzilla showed up, it seems like a new kaiju arrived like, every other week.
Wiz: But one of the most dangerous of these kaiju was the terror of the skies: Rodan.
Boomstick: Being 154 feet tall and weighing 40,000 tons, Rodan is a bit larger than your average bird.
Wiz: Well he's not a bird at all actually, but rather a pteranodon that somehow managed to survive into the present day. He, along with a female Rodan lived in Mount Aso, the largest active volcano in Japan. They fed on giant insect monsters known as Meganulon, until eventually being mutated by, you guessed it, nuclear radiation.
Boomstick: Yeah, Rodan wasn't too thrilled about that and decided to take his anger out on humanity by attempting to kill all of them. Although later on he had a change of heart and decided to defend humanity instead of destroying it. Well, you know, sometimes.
Wiz: Rodan is incredibly powerful, and a big reason for this is his flight speed. He can fly up to mach 3 speeds, or 2,300 miles per hour. This allows him to create deadly shockwaves, meaning Rodan can annihilate an entire city without even touching it.
Boomstick: But when he does need to get physical, he's more than ready thanks to his insane strength and being covered head to toe in sharp objects, such as his deadly talons, razor-sharp beak, and his spiked chest.
Wiz: That's not all. After battling with Godzilla, Rodan actually absorbed his atomic energy and took on a new form: Fire Rodan. As Fire Rodan he gains the ability to use the Uranium Heat Beam, an attack very comparable to Godzilla's own Atomic Breath.
Boomstick: Yeah, it's pretty obvious Rodan is super overpowered. I mean, he takes the Atomic Breath like it's nothing, battled Godzilla for 12 hours, and knocked King Ghidorah out of the sky.
Wiz: He's even strong enough to easily lift Godzilla, who weighs over 60,000 tons.
Boomstick: I finally found someone who can lift my ex-wife. And if you're that strong, you've gotta be totally unstoppable, right?
Wiz: Well no, he has had plenty of losses, ranging from the likes of Godzilla, King Ghidorah, and Mothra.
But despite this, Rodan has proven to be one of the strongest kaiju in Godzila history. He's not unbeatable, but he won't go down easily.
Birdon[]
(Cue: Ultraman Taro Opening Theme)
Wiz: When Earth is threatened by gigantic monsters, it's up to defense forces such as ZAT to defend from such dangers.
Boomstick: Unfortunately, these forces... well they're pretty useless. Because of this, humanity has to depend on giant alien superheroes called Ultra Warriors to defend them.
Wiz: One of these heroes was named Ultraman Taro, and was responsible for protecting the Earth. He proved effective at first, but would soon be faced with one of his deadliest opponents: Birdon.
Boomstick: I know what you're thinking: what's so dangerous about a Thanksgiving turkey with giant balls on its face?
Wiz: They're not testicles!
Boomstick: But at 200 feet tall and weighing 36,000 tons, he won't exactly fit on a plate.
Wiz: Having been sealed away in a volcano for centuries, Birdon was eventually freed thanks to an eruption and wanted to feast on his ancient rival: the giant insect monster Kemjila.
Boomstick: And since having giant monsters stomp around Japan can be, you know, a bit hazardous, Ultraman Taro stepped in to ward off the kaiju.
Wiz: Birdon, seeing Ultraman Taro as a threat to his territory, decided to attack the giant of light.
Boomstick: But Taro's killed over a dozen monsters before, so surely this would be no proble-
Boomstick: HOLY SHIT! IS HE FUCKING DEAD!?
Wiz: That's right Boomstick. To the shock of everyone, Birdon killed Ultraman Taro. This tragic turn of events caused the Ultra warrior known as Zoffy to show up to avenge the fallen Taro.
Boomstick: Being 25,000 years old, Zoffy is one of the most skilled and experienced Ultra warriors, so surely he wil-
Boomstick: WHAT THE FUCK!? HE DIED TOO?
Wiz: Seemingly unstoppable now, Birdon continued his bloodlust. ZAT tried once again to stop this creature, but there wasn't really anything they can do.
Boomstick: Clearly, Birdon is insanely powerful, I mean, not only does he have some massive physical strength, but he can fly at MACH 10 SPEEDS!
Wiz: He can tunnel beneath the earth, impale foes with his sharp beak, and flap his wings to create powerful hurricane-force winds.
Boomstick: And if he wasn't powerful enough, he can shoot a deadly stream of fire from his mouth.
Wiz: As threatening as those abilities are, they pale in comparison to his ultimate weapon.
Boomstick: Are they the massive ballsacks on his face?
Wiz: Yes- well no, they're not testicles, they're poison sacks. He can inject foes with a deadly venom capable of weakening enemies for up to a day, can be blinding if exposed to the eyes, and can even be fatal.
Boomstick: I think it goes without saying that Birdon is fucking ridiculous. Like, we already mentioned how he killed Ultraman Taro and Zoffy, which is still really impressive by the way, but he's done waaaaaaay more.
Wiz: Right, his beak is strong enough to breat Kemjila's egg.
Boomstick: What's so impressive about breaking some egg?
Wiz: This is the same egg that survived centuries inside a volcano. Which Birdon also survived himself.
Boomstick: Sure he can survive in a volcano, but that's nothing compared to the time when he survived in SPACE. Or the time he was able to get off the ground with the 60,000 ton Ultraman Taro hanging on his back.
Wiz: He shouldn't even be able to get airborne with those pathetic excuses for wings. How he manages to pull those feats off is beyond me. That being said, don't mistake his extreme power for invincibility.
Boomstick: Like any man, his weakness is his nuts.
Wiz: FOR THE LAST TIME, THEY'RE NOT TESTICLES! However, it is true that his poison sacks are more vunerable than the rest of his body, and his poison can even hurt him.
Boomstick: And when Mother of Ultra cheated by reviving Taro, he was able to seal Birdon back in the volcano. And while he's returned many times since then, his track record in fights isn't nearly as impressive as it once was.
Wiz: He's hardly perfect sure, but despite his goofy appearance, Birdon might be one of the most dangerous monsters in the Ultraman multiverse.
Pre-Fight[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, and we've run the data through all possibilities.
Boomstick: It's time for a death battle!
Death Battle[]
Sirens and gunshots are heard as the police force are seen battling against many Meganulons. Citizens flee in terror as some are devoured by the giant insects.
But suddenly loud gusts of winds are heard. A police officer stops shooting a Meganulon and looks behind himself to see Rodan approaching at supersonic speeds. Nearby buildings are demolished by the pterosaurs deadly shockwaves. Rodan lands and begins to feast on the Meganulons. One of them however, manages to escape. Rodan prepares to persue, but suddenly a giant beats swoops in from the sky and steals Rodan's prey. It is revealed to be Birdon, who lands and roars triumphantly. The two kaiju glare at each other and prepare to battle over territory and food.
Fight![]
Both kaiju quickly take to the skies and fly at each other. They clash multiple times midair, but Rodan seems to have the advantage. They speed up and clash again but this time Rodan kicks Birdon, knocking him hundreds of feet back and onto the ground. Rodan lands and roars at his opponent, but Birdon responds by spewing a barrage of flames at Rodan. These have little effect, and Rodan flaps his wings to create wind gusts to push the fire back to sender. Birdon also creates wind gusts and the two hurricane-force winds, combined with the fire, create a massive flame tornado that burns most of the city the cinders.
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Despite the massive deflagration, both kaiju are relatively unharmed. They take flight and look to clash in midair again, but Birdon intentionally misses. He keeps flying to increase his speed, Rodan tries to keep up but is unsuccessful. Birdon then turns around and charges at Rodan and breaths more fire at him. While Rodan is unharmed, it hinders his vision, allowing Birdon to land a powerful strike. He tries to peck at Rodan with his deadly beak, but the fire demon narrowly manages to escape. He then retreats, but Birdon is in pursuit. He shoots his fire breath but Rodan manages to dodge it. However, he cannot outfly Birdon as intended. The volcano bird monster inches closer and closer until eventually catching up, hitting Rodan so hard, he gets knocked out of the sky. Rodan falls thousands of feet and lands on a nuclear power plant, which is completely and utterly destroyed by the colossal kaiju's impact.
Birdon lands nearby and lets out a triumphant roar, thinking he's won. But suddenly, a massive purple beam appears from the burning rubble, directly hitting Birdon. Birdon shrieks in pain and nearly falls over. Rodan emerges from the destroyed power plant, as Fire Rodan. Both kaiju fire their beams, but the Uranium Heat Beam is clearly the stronger of the two. Birdon makes a quick retreat, and Fire Rodan follows. He fires the Uranium Heat Beam again, but Birdon evades it, and his faster speed allows him to distance himself from Rodan. He then turns around and creates wind gusts to disrupt Fire Rodan's flight. This buys Birdon enough time to quickly fly in and impale Rodan with his beak and inject him with poison. Fire Rodan manages to peck Birdon with his beak, but this isn't nearly as effective. The two continue to fight in midair, repeatedly clashing, but Rodan keeps getting slower and hitting softer. Eventually, Birdon hits him so hard it knocks him to the ground.
Rodan lies wounded on the earth, trying to get up, but is weakned because of the poison and his injuries. Birdon lands and stabs Fire Rodan in the face with his beak, killing him.
K.O![]
Results[]
Boomstick: Damn! I was hoping Rodan would win, now I have to settle for a Thanksgiving pterosaur instead of turkey.
Wiz: This was undoubtedly a tough match for both combatants.
Boomstick: Rodan was a bit stronger, seeing as he could easily lift the 66,000 ton Godzilla whereas Birdon could barely lift the 60,000 ton Ultraman Taro.
Wiz: But that's where Rodan's advantages end. And his strength didn't amount to much, since his raw force was not enough to take down Birdon.
Boomstick: Yeah, I mean Birdon takes hits from Ultra warriors, most of which can easily lift over 100,000 tons! So Rodan's strength was nothing he hadn't seen before.
Wiz: In addition, Birdon has heat resistance and has tanked energy blasts before, meaning the Uranium Heat Beam was also very limited.
Boomstick: So you're saying Rodan doesn't really have a way to reliably kill Birdon?
Wiz: That's right Boomstick, but the same could not be true for Birdon. If he uses his poison, Rodan doesn't really have anything to do about that. And while Rodan wouldn't allow himself to get poisoned so easily, with Birdon's MASSIVE speed advantage he could only hold him off for so long.
Boomstick: Not that he really needs the posion. His beak his definitely strong enough to pierce Rodan's skin, and while Rodan's survived impalement before, he was put out of commission for the rest of the fight.
Wiz: In conclusion, Birdon's extreme speed gave him all the opportunity he needs to land the fatal blow, while also being able to survive just about anything Rodan could throw at him.
Boomstick: Looks like Birdon won with flying colors.
Wiz: The winner is Birdon.
