Riley Lambert VS Jeff the Killer

Description[]

The Mario Murders vs Jeff the Killer! A beating at a party can go mess you up in head so much you kill people, even if they did nothing to you...

This is a collab between Smaggle and Bunny Cat4.

Intro[]

Riley Lambert Jumps Up in DEATH BATTLE! (Bunny Cat4)[]

(Music - It's A Me (Instrumental))

Pikachu7: Riley Lambert was born into the late 90s as an only child.

Michael the Cat: And like a LOT of only childs on the Connor Pugs channel, Riley was a spoiled little shit.

Pikachu7: His parents treated like he was "God's" gift to man and didn't fit in with the other kids.

Michael the Cat: Yeah, going to birthday parties and expecting that you, the guest, should receive the attention instead of the birthday kid would not win you some fans... okay, 2 things. 1, this feels like a Connor pugs video oddly enough, and 2, as of typing this, it's near me and Bunny Cat4's birthday!

Pikachu7: Oh shit, already?! Happy early birthday, man!

Michael the Cat: Thanks buddy! :)

Pikachu7: Going home after not getting attention and angst about it, his miserable excuse of parents would give him a gift, usually a video game. Over the years, he gotten into the games. Like, EXTREMELY into them.

Michael the Cat: Like bo-

Pikachu7: *gives a death glare to Michael* Don't you DARE finish that sentence. Like the games as he could play a world that's all about him, and no one could take that away.

Michael the Cat: Like Sr Pelo's Dr. Meocortex, Riley has gotten the good shit in video games, but one series stand out to him the most: Super Mario.

Background[]

Name: Riley Lambert
Age: At least 21
Birthday: Into the late 90s
Likes: Mario, attention, Mario, stalking girls, Mario
Highschool dropout
Job: Mario-themed serial killer
Should be classified as a BETA CUCK

Pikachu7: Growing up to be tall, dark, and handsome, unlike this guy, you think he wouldn't have a problem with women, right? Well, no.

Michael the Cat: To quote some Memphis Tennessee, I think, maybe, I don't know, it's been a long time since I saw the dub, "Being an alpha gamer makes you friend-zoned a lot".

Pikachu7: I HIGHLY doubt he said that, but whatever. Moving on. It put him over the edge, so he did the most reasonable thing ever: skip classes, hang around campus and stalk girls while playing Super Mario Odyssey on his switch. Yeah, like that's going to help you dude.

Riley Lambert: *as blood trickled out of his mouth* It's-a me.

Jeff Goes. To. Sleep in DEATH BATTLE! (Smaggle)[]

Wiz: On a certain day in 2008, the Hodek, or, Woods family moved to a nice new, fresh home.

Boomstick: Little did the Hodeks know, these few days would be their last on earth!

Wiz: Jeff and his brother, Liu, while walking to school, were ambushed by three skater kids, Randy, Troy, and Keith, who attempted to take their money.

Boomstick: Only for Jeff to beat the absolute SHIT out of 'em...And it to him, it felt GOOD

Wiz: Jeff, and Liu ran away after this, as the School Bus had drove up, which would've gotten them into serious trouble- But they somehow got to school anyways.

Boomstick: When school finished, Jeff and Liu came home to find cops at their house, and Liu, not wanting his bro to crumple up in juvy took the blame..

Wiz: Jeff was incredibly distraught, trying to tell the cops Liu was lying, but they never listened.

Boomstick: A day later, Jeff's mom woke him up for the neighbour's kid's birthday party.

Wiz: Jeff, forced to go with no other option, got dressed, however the clothes he put on weren't "fancy" enough, and so, Jeff assembled his iconic ensemble, and walked nextdoor.

Boomstick: Jeff went outside, and got handed a hat and a toy gun by a kid, but then..He heard a familiar skating noise, unlike a normal person, Jeff assumed that only the hipsters who attacked him rode skateboards.

Wiz: Weirdly enough, Jeff was actually right, and Randy, Troy, and Keith jumped up from the fence to fight Jeff..Somehow knowing he was there despite not seeing or hearing him- Anyways, Randy brutalised Jeff, and Troy slammed him through a patio door, and shattered the glass.

Boomstick: Heh..Talk about a tub of lard..

Wiz: And in that moment, when Randy tossed and turned him around rooms, Jeff snapped, and punched Randy hard enough for his heart to stop.

Boomstick: Troy and Keith whipped out their guns - a .44 Remington Magnum and a Glock 17 respectively, and chased Jeff up-stairs and into the bathroom like a Scooby-Doo episode!

Wiz: Jeff, for some inexplicable reason, had the physical power to rip-off a grab-rail and bash it onto Troy's head, presumably killing him, leaving only him and Keith.

Boomstick: Keith was a lot faster thanks to his lanky physique, and got the upper hand on little Jeff.

Wiz: Much to the dismay of them both, however, the shockwave of bashing Jeff on the wall caused a shockwave, as a "thing of bleach", SOMEHOW OPEN- fell on top of them, blinding them both for a while, but Jeff recovered faster, allowing him to knock Keith down with a towel rack, causing both of them to "lay there and bleed to death", HOW!?, Keith's only been hurt once!

Boomstick: SHH! You're getting to the best part!

Wiz: ...But, the tables had turned, as Keith got up, letting out an ominous smile, Jeff asking him what was funny, as Keith responded by describing Jeff's predicament in perfect detail, before throwing the lighter at Jeff, bleaching and burning his skin.

Boomstick: Jeff, finally being a normal human being screamed and threw himself down the stairs, being barbecued alive.

Wiz: In an act of pure luck, Jeff was rushed to the hospital, and made a full recovery, only horribly disfigured thanks to the surgeons' negligence.

Boomstick: Being crazed again, Jeff somehow loved his..Ugh..Leathery face..

Wiz: Unluckily for Liu, he was let out of JDC, and had to go home with his psychotic brother.

Boomstick: Later that night, Jeff's mom woke up to see Jeff disfiguring his face EVEN MORE, burning out his eyelids and carving a permanent smile into his face.

Wiz: Then, after Jeff's mother told her husband to get the gun, Jeff was standing by the door, as his parents were killed swiftly.

Boomstick: Then, Jeff went to his brother's room, and killed the poor guy too.

BACKGROUND[]

Name: Jeffrey C. Hodek/Jeffrey Woods
Aliases: "Onimous Unknown Killer", in all capitals.
Age: Teens, later adulthood.
Likes: ALL HE COULD DO, WAS KILL. KILL. KILL.
Dislikes: .
Birthday: Unknown
Jobless Highschool drop-out.
For a guy who should suffer from heavy eye irritation, he sure does love sleeping.

Wiz: An unspecified amount of time later, he broke into someone's home, monologuing in a rather patient and calm voice.

Boomstick: But when the guy woke up he got murked and JUMPSCARED BY THAT GOD AWFUL FACE-

Wiz: Since then, Jeff's killing spree was spread out and became a massive urban legend.

Boomstick: Let's just hope I can get a good night's sleep without having to think of the -- ugh...Leathery skin.

Ending Quote

“

"You may not know me... But I've known you for a while now. More than you probably know yourself...It's no time for you to ask questions! The time is past your bedtime! So better go to sleep, Friend. And do not open your eyes 'till it's morning. And, pretend, like nothing. Happened. Go to sleep, my friend. That's right."

„

DEATH BATTLE[]

Results[]

Trivia (Credit to Smaggle)[]

Connections[]

Once normal teenagers, whom, after a savage beating at a party by a group of bullies, end up horribly disfigured, and mentally shattered, leading them to kill the ones who had ruined their lives, and even those who did nothing to them.

OST[]

The title of the track is Disfigured Psyches.