| CANDY BURN | |
|---|---|
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| Season | 1 |
| Season Episode | 6 |
| Air date | May 3rd, 2024 |
| Written by | DimeUhDozen |
| Episode guide | |
| Previous Sweet Tooth vs. Dick Dastardly |
Next Enid Mettle vs. Blake Belladonna |
| “ | Duchess's passion project completely blows the show budget and we are all the worse for it, to be perfectly honest. | „ |
| ~ Tagline |
Description[]
In the sixth episode of DimeUhDozen's Death Battle series, all hell breaks loose when Duchess reveals her evil plan leading up for the entire season: making a matchup so insane that everyone will have no choice but to acknowledge it. The queen bee Regina George from Mean Girls faces off against the mythic bitch Heather Chandler from Heathers.
Prologue[]
Closing in on the DEATH BATTLE laboratories, where Duchess grins madly as she uses Wiz's old equipment to make some Frankensteinian nightmare. Tugging at a wrench and using a blowtorch, she puts the final pieces on her masterpiece. Once she sees its completion, she snickers, evolving into a full on maniacal laugh. Then, her AI assistant gently taps her on the shoulder.
Antoinette: Um... ma'am, you still haven't told me what the evil plan is yet? Why go through with purchasing an internet series, completely taking it over, and just... making episodes as normal? It doesn't sound very evil to me... Oh, are you going to use this next episode to brainwash everyone?
Duchess: No.
Antoinette: Aaaare you going to distract everyone with this fight so efficiently that they won't notice your greatest heist yet?
Duchess: No.
Antoinette: Then... what ARE you doing?
Duchess: I'm going to finally reveal to the world what I really am. Something powerful, something demonic. Something no one in our audience could have possibly seen coming.
Her shadow grows upon the wall, looking almost like some alien monstrosity as Antoinette shivers in fear, growing in horror and realization. Then, smash cut to Duchess ripping apart her dress and revealing all of her theater merch.
Duchess: A THEATER KID.
Antoinette: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
Interlude[]
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Electronica in the Velvet Room by Shoji Meguro  
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Duchess: Throughout history, mankind has seen apex predators the likes no one has ever seen. Leaders, people of great influence in society, and overall monsters. But none of them even slightly compare to the raw powerful interlaced with the veins of these goddesses of high school. ... AHEM... Antoinette, that's your cue.
Antoinette: Do... Do I have to do this?
Duchess: It would make me really happyyyy if you diiiiidd...
Antoinette: (sigh) Like the world-burning "massive deal", Regina George from Mean Girls.
Duchess: And the omnipotent mythic bee-yatch Heather Chandler from Heathers.
Antoinette: This is Madame Duchess, and I don't want to be here.
Duchess: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE! A DEATH BATTLE OF MY CHOOSING! HAHA! AHAHAHAHAHAHA-
Regina George is a Massive Deal in DEATH BATTLE![]
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One Winged Angel Rebirth by Nobuo Uematsu, Masashi Hamauzu
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Duchess: There have been many influential cautionary tales told over the years. Like the myth of Icarus, the dystopian prophecy of 1984, but none so profound and impactful as the corruption of Cady Heron.
Antoinette: You can't seriously be going through with this, ma'am--
Duchess: Transferring into North Shore High School from the wilds of Africa, Cady was merely searching for somewhere to belong and found herself in a crossfire between the misfits Janis and Damian, and The Plastics. The most powerful force in the nation of which Janis was an unfortunate victim some time ago. Consisting of the ditzy Karen Smith, the lapdog Gretchen Wieners, and the ultimate lifeform Regina George.
Antoinette: MA'AM, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?
- Regina George:
- Age: 17
- Height: 5'7"
- Occupation: Queen Bee of North Shore High, Life-Ruiner
- Likes: Absolute Power
- Dislikes: Loss of Status
Duchess: Regina commands North Shore High School with an iron fist and is virtually untouchable. She keeps everyone including the staff completely under her thumb. She is a being of unfathomable status and a master manipulator. Her imposing nature causes her to strike fear into all those who meet her due to her reputation as a life-ruiner. Once she singles you out, you're done for.
Antoinette: (obviously reading from the script) Cady Heron was surprisingly chosen by Regina to be taken under her wing by The Plastics and asked to join their clique. At the same time, she got a crush on a boy named Aaron. Two opposing interests that would soon clash together.
Duchess: It was then that she would be introduced to the Burn Book, a powerful instrument of chaos with insults written about just about everyone you could possibly imagine, and Regina's ace in the hole. However, taking no caution, Cady attempted to use her relationship with Regina to get to Aaron. But Regina being the taker of all kissed Aaron at a Halloween party instead.
Antoinette: (gasp)
Duchess: It was then that Cady decided to take revenge on Regina by sabotaging her and weakening her from her otherwise perfect state, and inadvertently causing herself to become just as morally corrupt as her adversary, becoming that which she chose to destroy.
Antoinette: Okay... I'm a little invested.
Duchess: Taking her down wouldn't be easy however.
- Broadway Force:
- Transmutation
- Mind Control
- Transformation
- Reality Warping
- Paralysis Inducement
- Much More
Duchess: Regina is a practitioner of Broadway Force, which is like Toon Force, but way cooler. At base value, it can make everyone in the room immediately join in on what seems like a planned musical number, but is actually a massive shift in reality. She can however extend this power to however she desires, like turning people into dogs and causing them to behave like them, transforming into the sun itself, and immediately silencing and paralyzing people. Her glare alone can make an entire school go still and turn them into animals like the dog feat before.
Antoinette: Ha-ha. I'm sorry. WHAT!?
Duchess: She can also take the form of a lioness if she desires and shift between them at random. Prolonged exposure to Regina can also cause people's morals to become corrupt, such as when Cady felt Regina's influence and became intoxicated by the power. Most frighteningly, Regina has the apparent power to see the inner selves or souls of those she glares at and cause them to deteriorate into abstract squiggles.
Antoinette: She can form jail cells out of nothing, use telekenesis, generate clothes and objects, teleport and reform from a shadow, and grow to the size of a giant. W-Wow, but... what's her actual power level? Besides the sun thing?
Duchess: At her peak, Regina has the power to stop the gravitational rotation of the Earth. Stopping this would be the equivalent of 2.58e29 Joules or 61.66 exatons. She's also shown to be much larger than the Earth, so she could potentially be much higher.
Antoinette: ...This is still Mean Girls, right?
Duchess: But Regina is not invincible. If enough damage is done to her social status, she will weaken, such as when Cady tricked her into eating fattening snack bars, and usurped her as the leader of the Plastics. However, at this point, Regina still had one trump card, The Burn Book.
Antoinette: Using a brilliant tactic, Regina placed her own faults in her Burn Book in order to pin its writings on the new Plastics, sending the school into absolute chaos. Even in this state, Regina is still immensely powerful.
Duchess: As World Burn Regina, she can generate fire, slow down and speed up time, and summon shadows to her side. But despite this, she is also incredibly vulnerable. Her strength is severely lowered to the point where even a bus is able to incapacitate her.
Antoinette: That's right, Duchess. Despite her best attempts, Regina was dethroned for good and left injured by a head-on collision with a school bus. In the meantime, Cady redeemed herself by taking responsibility for the Burn Book and giving up what Regina never could. Her social status and pride. Eventually, at the Spring Fling dance, she managed to confess her true feelings with Aaron and run into an injured Regina one last time.
Duchess: Regina confessed that even underneath all of the power she acquired, she did not feel like a person. That everyone saw her at base value and considered herself more of an idol. Giving up the glory and intoxicating power, the both of them made up, and Cady made a statement by destroying the plastic crown once and for all.
Antoinette: That... was awesome, ma'am.
Duchess: Even though the plastic crown is dead, one cannot deny just how much of a menace Regina was in her prime. She's the queen of beasts, she can smell your fear. She is... the Apex Predator.
(Clip from Mean Girls: The Musical)
Regina: I WANNA WATCH THE WORLD BURN!
(SFX: Gates Closing)
Heather Chandler is the Me Inside of DEATH BATTLE![]
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Candy by bb-panzu
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Duchess: Welcome to Westerberg High, otherwise known as the Thunderdome, where everyone is either superficial, mean to each other, or a suck-up to The Heathers, the most popular girls in school. Unless you're Veronica Sawyer, a lonely little nobody who aspires to have the kind of power they possess, at the same time pining for the old days when everyone wasn't such a jerk.
Antoinette: She'd get her chance when the alpha bitch of the Heathers herself, Heather Chandler saw potential in her unique skills to copy any kind of handwriting and in return, helped her converted into Heathersdom. ...Wait, so are they all named Heather or is it a title thing?
Duchess: Unclear!
- Heather Chandler:
- Age: 17
- Height: 5'4"
- Occupation: Leader of the Heathers
- Likes: Absolute Power, Corn Nuts
- Dislikes: Insubordination
Duchess: Aside from Heather Duke and Heather McNamara, Heather Chandler is a presence that absolutely commands respect, and if she doesn't get it, she'll be happy to take yours instead. As Veronica states, Heather is a mythic bitch and is more of a queen that her two subordinates. She frequently knocks Duke away to steal her spotlight and has all but removed McNamara's willingness to think for herself.
Antionette: Chandler is genuine evil and Veronica was soon to experience exactly why. Veronica's best friend, Martha, believed naively that Ram, one of the dumbest school jocks, still had feelings for her due to a memory she had in kindergarten but Heather taught to smash her dreams simply because she thought it was funny, and because she COULD.
Duchess: She ordered Veronica to write a fake love letter from "Kurt" inviting Martha to his homecoming party, leaving her exposed to humiliation and Veronica initially refused. But Heather's influence was absolute and eventually she gave into her demands through a banging villain song.
Antoinette: HONEY, WHATCHU WAITING FORRR? WELCOME TO MY-... S-Sorry. Just listening to the... soundtrack you gave me, ma'am.
Duchess: Fufufufu... You're getting converted...
Antoinette: AHEM. It was then that Veronica met Jason Dean or J.D. for short, her shortcut to independence or so she thought. Impressed at the way he stood up for himself against the school jocks, she kept him in mind all the way to the party where she saved Martha from certain humiliation by the Heathers at the cost of her own reputation.
Duchess: And believe us, you do NOT want to be at the receiving end of Chandler's wrath.
- Broadway Force:
- Soul Manipulation
- Power Nullification
- Reality Warping
- Spatial Manipulation
- Mind Manipulation
- Much More
Duchess: Heather is able to passively generate an aura that makes those surrounding her immensely love or fear her, making her the queen bitch of the school and walk above it all. She is known as the Almighty and for good reason. She can manipulate spider webs, warp reality and space to a location of her choosing, including creating extremely tall pits, and generate platforms with just a tap of her foot.
Antoinette: She is also capable of astral projection and can transform and fuse her soul with others to form and reform from physical and abstract form, turning into things like giant lollipops if she pleases. She can also manipulate souls herself by creating incorporeal and invisible strings, wrapping them around a victim and bending them to her whims. If she wants, she can even REDUCE someone to just an abstract state, pressuring them with madness-inducing thoughts until they give in.
Duchess: Heather is also a master of illusions, able to show Veronica two possible futures at once, and make what seemed like illusions come to reality, such as when she manifested a giant lollipop from underneath her feet and grew to the size of a giant. ...She can also do Fortnite dances.
Antoinette: But if you get on Heather's good side, she can give you the powers of a Heather, like she did to Veronica. But on the other hand, she can also take them away and straight up delete you from existence at a set time and date, making you less than a nobody in the process, which she also... did to Veronica once she betrayed her.
Duchess: Generously given just a few hours to live, Veronica spent them how anyone else would. Making out with someone she just met. But Heather's spirit managed to invade Veronica's mind, claiming that she was omnipresent and put fear into her heart, prompting her to immediately go with J.D. to Heather's house to apologize to her. But Heather wasn't having it. Despite Veronica's best efforts, she was not forgiven. Fortunately, she wouldn't have to. J.D. weakened Heather with drain cleaner, poisoning her body and killing her in the process.
Antoinette: And that's the end of Heather, right?
Duchess: Not exactly. Even when Heather's body dies, her spirit can ascend out of her body and she can live on as a ghost. This ghost is shown to still be able to interact with the living world and she still maintains her popularity and power, able to warp and possess scraps of paper, assume a will-o-wisp form, create constructs out of ectoplasm and retain her spacial, soul, and reality warping abilities. She is nearly IMPOSSIBLE to get rid of. However, there is a way to keep her under control. By forging a fake note from Heather, Veronica was able to control her, making her say and feel things she ordinarily wouldn't.
Antoinette: Luckily for Veronica, Heather wasn't interested in killing her anyways, and was much more interested in how she would react to the oncoming storm of J.D.'s killing spree. All in the name of goodness and decency, he tricked her into believing all of this was for the best, and proceeded to have her believe that the two jocks Ram and Kurt would be subject to a prank. They'd be shot by "Ich Lüge" bullets that supposedly carried a tranquilizer that would put them to sleep -- but in reality, the bullets were real. I-... I didn't know this would get so... dark.
Duchess: Veronica would once again forge another note claiming the jocks were gay lovers, bringing the community together. Even though the body count was increasing, so too was the happiness of Westerberg. J.D. insisted again that this was the only way society would improve, like a total edge lord, while Veronica insisted that this is where the killings would end. He agreed, yet Heather warned her from beyond the grave that he would just keep going and going until he was satisfied. Which was never. After seeing him with a gun one last time, Veronica was not sure that she could trust J.D. anymore and confessed to Martha what had really happened.
Antoinette: But by then it was too late. This sent Martha into a depressive spiral that nearly cost her her own life, J.D. was hatching a plan to destroy the entire school, and Duke was being slowly corrupted by Chandler's scrunchie into becoming her successor. Eventually, enough was enough and Veronica intended on sacrificing her own life to put a stop to J.D. and saving the school. Though it was a hard-fought battle, J.D. lost and realized that his love for Veronica surpassed his own hatred for mankind, deciding to sacrifice himself in the process.
Duchess: From then on, Veronica created a new era in Westerberg where no one had to be afraid or fake, declaring "no more Heathers" and allowing Chandler's soul to finally rest in peace.
Antoinette: That was... That was a trip, ma'am.
Duchess: Now, let's get cracking on her power level. Heather can easily overpower Veronica, who was said to be half of the meteor that killed the dinosaurs and was said to be capable of destroying and remaking the world. Since she would only perform half of this feat, her power would equate to 29.720363288718936 zettatons.
Antoinette: H-How are these two Mean Girls actually cosmically powerful beings!? AND WHY IS IT ALWAYS THE TEENAGE GIRLS THAT HAVE THE COSMIC FEATS!?
Duchess: Living or dead, the world is Heather's Candy Store, and you're just living in it.
( Clip from Heathers: The Musical )
Heather: Well, FUCK ME gently with a CHAINSAW!
( SFX: Gates Closing )
Pre-battle[]
Missness: All possibilities have been accounted for, and I'm about to make a lot of money...
Antoinette: DEATH BATTLE SIMULATION COMMENCING.
DEATH BATTLE![]
Opening on center stage.
A massive theater with sparkling lights illuminate the darkness around it, and approximately six differently colored silhouettes loom down from the catwalks above, almost as if to observe the chaos that is about to unfold with anticipation and delight. One of the spotlights swerves around and reveals a girl in a pink jacket, immediately raising up her elbow to protect her from the blinding light. A massive LED set of text appears behind her to introduce her to the audience. REGINA GEORGE. And on the opposite end of the stage, a curly-haired girl with a croquet mallet in her hand appears, tossing it over her shoulder. Bloody red lights slide against the wall behind her as the queen of Westerberg High is introduced. HEATHER CHANDLER.
She immediately makes the first move as the band erupts into the opening notes of "Beautiful", and she struts towards her to the beat, looking her up and down, examining her, while Regina tosses up her head and scoffs. Seeing this as a challenge, Heather moves up into her space with an almost regal voice and a confrontational attitude. Regina squints and uncomfortably leans backwards.
Heather: Regina George. Aren't you supposed to be in the hospital?
Regina: Heather Chandler. Aren't you, like, dead?
Trumpets blare as an introduction to "Meet the Plastics" plays as if to accompany Regina as she circles around the living red traffic light, placing her hands on her hips.
Regina: My name is Regina George / And I am a massive deal / You've been dead, twenty years / Frankly... Are you real?
CLACK.
Heather slams her mallet down onto the ground and shifts her stance and patrol such that she is now the one circling around Regina, skidding the side of her weapon against the floor. Albeit begrudgingly, she flawlessly intersects herself into Regina's melody and grins like a devil.
Heather: Better dead than dethroned / You're just a washed up mess / You look like a pillowcase / And honey, where'd you get that dress?
The orchestra stirs as the both of them immediately reach for their collars, looking each other straight in the eyes. They look like they could go at it right here and right now. The stage begins to shift from red to pink to red to pink, constantly clashing as the stage lights swerve around and go ballistic, representing the intense feud that is about to commence. One for the ages and two for the show.
Regina: Skank!
Heather: Has-been!
Regina: Sl**!
Heather: Cu**!
They immediately break away as a strange glow overcomes them both. In a much more menacing tone, they begin to push forward melodies that challenge each other. There can only be one real queen bee that can walk away from all this and live. Neither of them are willing to admit the dishonor of surrendering. Heather grips her mallet whilst Regina flares up with fire.
Regina: My name is Regina George / And I am a massive deal.
Heather: I don't care who you are.
Both: I DON'T CARE... HOW YOU... FEEEEEEL~!
I'M GONNA TAKE YOU FOR A RIDE.
FIGHT!
The orchestra erupts into a jazzy, fast-paced swing version of "Candy Store" as Heather makes the first strike, swiftly making shots with her mallet, launching one melee attack after another as Regina shapeshiftts into a lioness, using agile and careful movements to lunge at the mallet and swipe it with her claws. In a split-second, she changes back into a human and high-kicks the mallet out of Heather's hand. The weapon goes flying out of her hands but Heather remains maliciously smug. The space beneath Regina utterly disappears into a blank void as she finds herself caught up in a spider's web. She struggles to break loose though is too late anyways, as something large like a metal pole smacks her square in the chest. Groaning out in pain, she witnesses Chandler wielding a giant lollipop, determined to chase after her through the abstract space as reality becomes coated in lollipops.
Heather: I HATE / Plastic trash / Sure, you burned / Now you crash!
Another smack of her lollipop though Regina manages to catch it this time, clashing against it with telekinesis as she pushes it away.
Heather: WOW. YOU'VE. / Come so far / Weren't you hit / By a car?
Completely lacking solid ground, the two of them summon platforms across the empty space as they leap and clash against each other, one after another, through this valley of a Candy Store. Heather throws the giant candy like a javelin, just narrowly missing Regina as she ducks below it, looking around with a growl as Heather seems to have disappeared. Though sh feels a rumbling beneath her. She wobbles uncomfortably and tries to find somewhere to hold onto.
Heather: I KNOW / What you were / You're not that / You're not her
Regina's jaw drops as a giant Heather Chandler rises from the abyss and she raises a fist against her. The entire world begins to rumble and cracks form from the platforms as Regina realizes she has nowhere left to go. Heather's face only becomes more malicious as the fist finally collides with the ground with Regina leaping out of the way, transforming into a whisk of shadow.
Heather: NOW YOU'VE / Got to go / Cady said / Told you so!
Regina reappears on Chandler's shoulder and dropkicks her in the cheek, which lightly staggers her. She turns to look at where Regina was standing, only to see a dark cloud where she once was. Behind her, a giant Regina emerges, just the same as her and tackles her into another reality as the scene shifts to North Shore High, both back to normal size. Tumbling over into the auditorium, Regina opens her palm and generates fire to slam into Heather's head, but the mythic bitch rolls out of the way and extends her fingertips, revealing bloody red strings. She snaps them towards Regina and she cartwheels out of the way of them. Heather retracts them with a smirk and throws them at her again. The orchestra pit strikes up a rising metal introduction to "Someone Gets Hurt".
Regina: My heart is beating / Says that "it's her or you" / You were a victim too / But pity? Screw that!
Regina runs side-by-side with Chandler, generating walls as she keeps attempting to block the strings that she keeps sending, though noticing that they get faster and more violent by the second. With a snap of her fingers, she traps Chandler within a hall of mirrors. Though Heather sees right through her ruse, raising her hands to deconstruct all of the glass in a second as they shatter. Looking for Regina whilst warping the plane more and more. Waving her arms as everything fades into white.
Regina: Your rich performance / It's only self-defense / Thought that you had the sense / To see right through that!
A horror sting as Regina's manipulations are cut short. Seeing herself in her Santa outfit and watching as a crowd of shadows linger in the audience of a macabre stage. It's just like the moment of her downfall, but she can feel the glares of everyone piercing right through her soul. She begins to hyperventilate, then starts to feel an intense pain in her head. Regina clasps it hard and begins to twitch, flickering between human and soul. She screams as she becomes just a combination of white lines, turning more abstract by the moment. Her thoughts start to cloud and only Heather's voice travels in her brain.
Heather: Oh... You think we're EQUALS. Ahahahahaha-... Stop pulling on my dick, Regina. We both know just how pathetic you are. So why don't you run home... to mommy and daddy...
Regina: NOOOOOAAAAAGGGHHHH!
She breaks off her control over her soul by manipulating it herself, forcing herself to reform back into physical form, panting after the intensity of Heather's assault. Though the battle is by no means over. A horrific red set of eyes and a smile lingers on in the shadows and Heather's giant lollipop makes a swing for her again. Regina fights back with telekinesis however, holding her hands open as she uses the opportunity to hold her by kicking her in the chest and staggering her backwards. Holding open her hand, a cane appears in her hand. Heather squints and turns her lollipop back into her croquet mallet.
Heather: I am the demon in your nightmares / I'm the dream of what you couldn't do / I'm the god that still lives on in legend / Heather is the you inside of you
Regina looks more panicked by the moment as she struggles to keep up with Heather's wild and reckless form of "sword-fighting", having to block her horizontal and diagonal strikes as she's pushed more into a corner, looking behind her to see that Heather is planning to form a bottomless pit for her to be dropped in. But she has a better plan. In a snap, it's another whiteout. Heather clasps her hand over her eye only to find a much brighter light emerging in the sky. It's the sun. With Regina's face on it. She literally is the sun. Heather's jaw drops.
Heather: Oh... corn nuts...
She feels herself being tugged towards it via Regina's telekinesis and she's yanked at quickening speeds out of the atmosphere, burning up due to the pressure alone, until she ends up spiraling deeper into space and plummeting directly into the deathly heat of the celestial body. Regina closes her eyes and smiles contently, thinking that she's finally won. But then she hears a creeping voice in her ears.
Heather: Yo girl / This is not over / Good luck / Putting me down / When I've taken your body / We'll see who wears the crown
Inching her eyes towards the sound of the voice... she sees a nearly transparent Heather with drain cleaner running down her lip. Her eyes are glowing blue and she clenches her fist, dispelling the illusion that she cast earlier. Regina gasps and looks down on North Shore High, seeing that Heather has manipulated her senses to make her believe that whole scene was a nightmare -- when in reality, every single student witnessed her breakdown. Her eyes dart everywhere as she feels her popularity decreasing by the second, all as Heather begins to laugh manically. Holding onto whatever last bit of power she has as it diminishes, timed by the cracks appearing in her statue below, Regina teleports back to ground level. Only to find Heather's ghost waiting for her, and immediately crashing after her. There's a demonic choir chanting as the orchestra turns frantic and bold.
Choir: HEATHER. HEATHER. AND HEATHER. / HEATHER. HEATHER. AND HEATHER.
Regina runs faster and faster until she reaches her house and her room. She finds what she is looking for. The Burn Book. Ripping out a page, she forges a fake note for Heather and looks back towards her, who appears shocked and afraid for the first time during the fight. Regina clicks a pen and stands triumphantly as she writes "I'm Heather. A greasy little nobody" in the book. A triumphant variation on World Burn begins to play as she stands up to Regina's ghost.
Choir: REGINA, REGINA, REGINA...
Regina: MY NAME IS REGINA GEORGE / AND IN CASE YOU'RE KEEPING SCORE / HEATHER MAY HAVE WON THE BATTLE / BUT I WILL WIN THE WAR!
She raises her hand in victory, but before she does, she feels a tightness in her chest. A pain like no other punctures her, and she can feel her body growing hollow and empty. Her eyes look dazed as she looks at her hand, looking just as see-through as Heather's, although even less so upon further glancing. Then, it's as if she can hardly see or feel herself at all. Only horror fills her eyes as Heather's ghost clasps her chin and lullabies her into the next life.
Heather: You're finished, do you hear me? Transfer to Washington. Transfer to Jefferson. No one in existence is going to let you play their reindeer games. Are you stoked, Regina? You get to become even less of a nobody. Enjoy nonexistence, sl**.
Regina: No-... NONONONONO!
Skulls appear in Regina's eyes as she attempts to grab Heather, but finds even her hand isn't phasing through. Her existence slips away by the moment and she lets out one last scream as Heather sings over her final bell.
Heather: It's my Candy Store / It's my Candy / It's my Candy Store / It's my Candy / It's my Candy Store / IT'S MY CANDY STOOORE! / WHOO-OAA~!
Heather thrashes her hands down and she appears once more on the stage in physical form with no trace of Regina in sight. Standing proud as the queen bee of all existence. She yanks her head upwards and gives a deliciously evil gleam at the audience, as if to ask them to worship her too. Even from beyond the grave, she remains the Almighty. Forever and always.
KO!
Results[]
Antoinette: Wh-... W.... Was that the very first musical Death Battle... ever...? Th-That was amazing! Can we do it again? Oh my gosh, that was so cool, I mean, what other musical characters are surprisingly strong like that, we have to d-...
Duchess: Actually, we sort of... blew the budget on the rights to those songs so... Ehhh....
Antoinette: We what.
Duchess: ANYWAYS! UM. HEATHER WINS.
Antoinette: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU BLEW THE BUDGET?!
Duchess: I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD BE THAT MUCH! I JUST THOUGHT WE COULD-
Antoinette: MA'AM, WE NEED THAT TO MAKE MORE EPISODES!
Duchess: I'M SORRY, I DIDN'T KNOW!
Antoinette: OUR NEXT MATCHUP IS GOING TO HAVE TO BE SOMETHING WE ALREADY OWN, DO YOU REALI-
Next Time[]
Duchess: N-Next time on... D-Death Battle.
???: Unfortunately, the real world isn't the same as a fairy tale.
???: I take it you've never worked in customer service.
BLAKE BELLADONNA VS ENID METTLE!
RWBY VS. OK K.O.!
Post-Credits Analysis[]
Duchess: Hi. Um. Antoinette locked me in the time-out room. Normally I would be against A.I. going rogue but, I think I deserved this one. So, um. It's just us. So let's go over why Heather won. Obviously, in terms of calculations... Veronica and J.D.'s "remaking the world" feat outclassed Regina just stopping it's rotation. We don't actually have any speed feats for them, aside from some blurred movements implying subsonic. So they're relatively equal, I think.
In terms of hax, they resist their passives. They're around Mean Girls with the same powers as them without suffering any kind of effects. And in the Revenge Party animatic, The Heathers are actually there. So... Regina's glares, the Mean Girl mindhax. Not working. However, Heather's illusion and soul hax that worked on Veronica who was still a Heather at the time... totally valid. However, Regina could still manipulate souls and could probably put herself back together from Heather's abstracting. Vice versa with Heather.
The sun feat, however? Heather would just die. I think anyone would die if they just... became the sun. But! Ghosts can't feel heat. And Heather is decidedly more competent when it comes to illusions and ruining people than Regina, and she can just take away powers when she feels like it as shown with Veronica. The Heather taketh, the Heather taketh away. Regina could theoretically take control of Heather with The Burn Book, but we also see Heather can take actions by herself while in this state. Regina would have needed to write in the Burn Book continuously and Heather is not letting that happen. She has timed EE, obviously she is going to use it.
Regina could possibly win, but she has considerably less knowledge on Heather than Heather does on Regina for being at the Revenge Party scene. So Heather handily takes this. If you want to see Anne Boleyn fighting or Sara Berry in a fight, I am very down for doing that just... don't tell Antoinette. I think she will lock me in here again if you do.
Antoinette: I HEARD THAT.
Duchess: Sorry. Duchess out!
Trivia[]
- This is DimeUhDozen’s sixth Death Battle episode.
- What the fuck.
- The combatants are both Mean Girl antagonists who end up corrupting the main protagonist. They are leaders of a clique consisting of groups of three, not counting the main protagonist. They are both from films that were adapted into musicals. Both are portrayed to have reality warping powers in animatics.
- Heather quotes Bill Cipher from Bill Cipher vs. Discord with her line "Oh, you think we're equals".
- The battle initially starts in the stage from Six: The Musical, alluding to a possible future appearance by Anne Boleyn or the queens.
- The battle's soundtrack "Candy Burn" is a back and forth musical number consisting of a slightly warped battle-arrangement medley of songs from both Mean Girls and Heathers.
- The battle would be drawn in the style of an animatic.