This is a what-if matchup between Princess Peach Toadstool (Nintendo) and Barbie (Mattel). Two blonde, pink-loving, strong females who often hold the role as princess in their magical worlds. Using their wide variety of magical equipment, abilities and fashion sense, who will have the standing ovation? Created by Ctpeyton.
Introduction[]
Wiz: Princess Peach - Ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom and on-and-off again prisoner or savior.
Boomstick: And Barbie - Mattel's popular doll brand and holder of many professions.
Wiz: These two pinky, blonde, young women have proudly been through it all; from playing sports to saving magical lands to going to space, they got the skills and arsenal to prove they aren't as weak as you might think.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE!
Princess Peach Stars in Death Battle![]
Wiz: Behold the Mushroom Kingdom. Here, you will find the most beautiful-and strange-views you have seen.
Boomstick: You got luscious, green grass, round hills, pipes to get around, floating blocks or pieces of land, mushrooms (of course) and mushroom PEOPLE. Sometimes, it's just a floating grassland with a castle.
Wiz: That castle is home to the mushroom peoples' leader - Princess Peach Toadstool.
Background
- Full name: Princess Peach Toadstool
- Height: 5'3" (160 cm)
- Weight: 90 Ibs (41 kg)
- Species: Human
- Ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom
- Daughter of King Toadstool
- One of the 7 Star Children
- Hobbies: Baking, gardening, golfing, go-karting, baseball, soccer, tennis, Olympic sports, traveling, being kidnapped (A LOT), attending Mario Party
Boomstick: When she was just a baby, her Highness was transported to the Mushroom Forest through a warp pipe. There, she was found and raised by the Mushroom People. As an adult, she would be crowned Princess after completing an obstacle course.
Wiz: Well, in the Super Mario Movie, yes. But, in the American comic, Peach is the daughter of King Toadstool. 
Overall, however, the Princess is one of the prophesized Seven Star Children, along with her two future saviors and her future captor. As such, she was destined for greatness since birth.
Boomstick: One day, the Mushroom Kingdom was invaded by the Koopa Tribe
and the traitorous Goombas
, all led by a giant turtle named King Koopa! Or "Bowser"
. Using dark magic, the Mushroom people were turned into bricks. Princess Peach held healing magic to reverse the effects, but was captured by Bowser. All hope seemed lost until two peculiar plumbers were transported to this land.
Wiz: Using their own special powers and expertise in jumping, the Mario Brothers would vanquish the evil Koopa King and save the Princess and her kingdom. This would start a constant rivalry - Bowser kidnaps the Princess, Mario comes to save her, the same thing happens, Mario saves the day again, sometimes they compete in sports and play party games. We've BEEN seen the games.
Boomstick: Luckily, though, Peach has displayed great potential from her experience gained other than trauma. For example, she can bake some really good cakes. She can send letters containing information or items while captured in Outer Space, but doesn't try to mail HERSELF. If I recall, she was a nurse once before being promoted to doctor, even as a baby. Don't ask how that's possible.
Wiz: She has participated in a wide variety of sports including soccer, tennis, kart-racing or motorcycling.
Boomstick: And my childhood favorite: rabbid-hunting.
Wiz: She has even participated and survived the series of death traps known to man as "Mario Party"; The 3rd one involved the Mario cast battling the so-called "Millennium Star", which flew from the center of the universe to Earth in seconds. 
Arsenal & Abilities
- Slap Glove
- Super Slap
- Royal Dress
- Sparkle Ribbon
- Baseball Bat
- Tennis Racquet
- Golf Club
- Frying Pan
- Parasol
- Perry the Parasol
- Boom-Brella
- Grenaduck
- Turnips
- War Fan
- Freeze Frame
- Zone Speed
- Royal Strike
- Empress Peach
- Boomshot
- Ghost Form
Boomstick: Peach's unique weaponry includes a baseball bat, golf club, tennis racket, frying pan and turnips, which she can apparently pull out-
Wiz: DON'T YOU DARE!
Boomstick: -the ground? Any ground, apparently.
Wiz: Oh...
Boomstick: The Princess has her parasol-fancy word for umbrella. It slows down her falling and shields her from attacks.
Wiz: But a more useful alternative is Perry the Living Parasol, whom Peach can also use to glide or use as a melee weapon. Perry is strong enough to disrupt an enemy's block and smash through actual blocks.
Boomstick: His favorite food is his enemies!
Wiz: With his magical properties, Perry is also capable of firing blasts and transforming to fit the situation. Even Peach's attire gives an advantage in combat: her royal dress serves as armor, while her gloves increases her strength.
Boomstick: Strength to perform an ancient technique passed down from generations of Mushroom people: the Bitch Slap!
Wiz: In the game of soccer, Mario characters use their own special techniques called Mega Strike; Peach's is the Empress Peach, where she leaps into the air, sprouts her angelic wings of glory and kick the ball so hard, it splits into three.
Boomstick: We didn't even mention Peach has the power to trap people in photographs with the Freeze Frame! ability.
Wiz: Correction: as shown in the Mario Strikers Charged intro, the flash of Peach's cameras blinds her opponents, leaving them in a daze for five seconds.
Boomstick: Incorrect! See? A large empty picture appears on the field, trapping any player caught in it, and making them stuck under the picture.
Wiz: O-oh. Weird. That should be blatant cheating.
Boomstick: Dude, when you have metahumans and powerful creatures playing in a game, how is anything fair? Well, that goes along with another win method, which is viewing the world in slow motion: Zone Speed! 
Wiz: But Princess Peach's bread-and-butter is her aforementioned magic that freed her people from their block-ified bodies. This brand of sorcery is called "Heart Power". Powerful enough to even seal the dark entity - Dark Star.
Heart Powers
- Hovering
- Levitation
- Therapy
- Group Hug
- Sleepy Time
- Come Back
- Mute
- Psych Bomb
- Weakening
- Vibe Powers
- Joy
- Gloom
- Calm
- Rage
This magic allows her to float above ground for a limited time, cancel another's magic, weaken their physique and durability, and summon sheep from the sky to put enemies to sleep.
Boomstick: Or she can ditch the sheep and make it rain BOMBS!
Wiz: However, Heart Power effectively acts as White Magic - healing magic, including reviving someone. And after being hit by the-
Boomstick: Go on.
Wiz: -the Vibe Scepter, Peach can literally channel her emotions into a powerful force.
Joy allows her to fly and create tornadoes. Calm heals her. Rage surrounds her with fire that burns anything upon contact, causes earthquakes by jumping, and grants limited invulnerability in exchange for her ability to jump high or move fast. Gloom makes her cry excessively, the tears able to grow plants-because DUH it's water-or harm enemies. Peach can also jump higher and run faster when in this mode.
Boomstick: Can't blame her; everyone needs a good run to get away from their problems. Speaking which, I think I'm losing weight...
Wiz: Princess Peach is athletic, skilled and a tactical fighter, even joining the Mario Brothers and fighting with them on their quests.
Once, she even saved them from Bowser, whom Peach sent into orbit with a single swing,
and Bowser can survive blackholes.
Boomstick: Speaking of whom, back when he got over Peach to chase after some cute Sprixie power, she and the Mario Bros-and Toad
and Rosalina
, too-set out to save their world with the use of some good 'ol fashion power-ups.
Power-Ups
- Super Mushroom
- Mega Mushroom
- Drill Mushroom
- Fire Flower
- Ice Flower
- Boomerang Flower
- Bubble Flower
- Wonder Flower
- Super Bell & Lucky Bell
- Tanooki Leaf
- Invincibility Leaf
- Double Cherry
- Elephant Fruit
- Earlier Times
- Super Star
Turns out, Peach, too, can channel the powers of fungus like her so-so boyfriend. The classic Super Mushroom increases her size. While the Mega Mushroom has the same effect, but MUCH MORE. Giantess Peach can mow down enemies, bricks, obstacles, pretty much nothing in her way can harm her.
Wiz: With a flower, she can use the elements of fire and ice... and the boomerang.
Boomstick: She gains a racoon suit that allows her to glide with the Tanooki Leaf. It's white version the Invincibility Leaf has the same effect, but in addition to unlimited invincibility. But the OG method of gaining invincibility is popping out the SUPER STAR! Though, it's not unlimited.
Wiz: She can use the Double Cherry to make clones of herself 
.
But the Super Bell turns her into Cat Peach, enabling her to climb up walls, sneak, scratch people or pounce on them. The Super Bell's jinglebell version gives the same effect, but has the extra power of turning into a statue. Then there is Earlier Times-a magic band (from what it looks like) that works as a time travel device; Peach can literally start a battle all over from the start, regaining lost health and energy. Unfortunately, though, any item she used will not come back.
Boomstick: On the cast's most recent adventure, the team gets some new power-ups: The element of water in the form of entrapping bubbles has been discovered with the Bubble Flower. A new, strong animal form has been achieved with the Elephant Fruit.
And look! She can burrow like Bugs Bunny with the Drill Mushroom. 
Speaking of Looney Tunes, sh#t gets wacky when the Wonder Flower is touched!
- “When you touch a Wonder Flower, expect the unexpected! The ground could start moving... or you might turn into something different for example.”
- —Shinya Takahashi, Nintendo Direct 6.21.2023
ANYTHING can happen! It's essentially nature's reality-warper; inanimate obstacles can come to life and move, the size and form of anyone around is changed, elements, the environment and matter are manipulated like silly putty, the most random of things are summoned. Like I said: ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN!
Wiz: The Princess has faced some of her world's most treacherous forces. With her team, Peach has defeated Exor, a dimensional gateway that could cause an explosion that covered an entire constellation. 
Along with Rayman's Rabbids of all things, they defeated the Megabug-the personification of a dimensional vortex that distorted the fabric of reality and could've eventually destroyed the world.
Boomstick: Peach shouldn't be too far from reaching the power of the Mario Brothers. Luigi, for one, defeated King Boo, who opened a dimensional portal that, given time, could've caused the universe to collapse. 
Mario, himself, took a castle-leveling explosion to the face and piloted the Star Driver as it rocketed through the atmosphere.
Both Brothers, though, can withstand a black hole. 
But we can't forget about the green dinosaur, himself, YOSHI! They were strong enough to knock away a gigantic Baby Bowser with EGGS (begins on 2:27) and launch a fat-ass raven with so much force, he became his own constellation (2:09).
Feats
- Saved Mario & Luigi single-handedly
- Survived every Mario Party
- Batted Bowser into orbit with one swing
- Survived an island explosion
- Gave a third of the energy needed to disperse a large storm
- Restored the Sparkle Theatre
- On par with the Mario Bros & Yoshi.
- Defeated Bowser, Exor, Megabug, the Darkles. Madame Grape & the Sour Bunch
Wiz: Princess Peach is fast enough to dodge lightning, smash bricks with her bare fists, survived an island explosion
and her power served as a contributor to disperse a storm (1:27); Mario, Mallow and Peach, with their powers combined, had to be putting in power of 1.024e+20 Joules.
Boomstick: But the Not-So Damsel in Distress would display more of her solo capability at the Sparkle Theatre, which was being taken over by the evil witch-Madame Grape. 
With sparkle sprite Stella at her side, a Princess's heart of gold, and a code to save any land or institution even outside her kingdom, Peach utilized her many costumes to maneuver her way through this reality-warped tragedy of a stage play.
Costumes
- Swordfighter Peach
- Detective Peach
- Pâtissier Peach
- Kung Fu Peach
- Ninja Peach
- Cowgirl Peach
- Figure Skater Peach
- Dashing Thief Peach
- Mermaid Peach
- Mighty Peach
- Radiant Peach
- Super Radiant Peach
-Radiant Peach when empowered with maximum Sparkles
In the end, Peach gained the power from the audience's and the actors' sparkle and defeated Madame Grape, and another land was saved! Helluva resume for Mushroom Kingdom's representative.
Wiz: Though she might be kidnapped time and time again, Princess Peach Toadstool is not to be underestimated; threaten her kingdom or her citizens, even the whole world, but the outcome won't be so peachy...
Boomstick: But seriously, this lady needs to wear a GPS tracker.
Barbie in a Death Battle[]
Boomstick: Dolls. We all known them, seen them, played with them.
Wiz: Wooden figures, plastic babies, and the porcelain... possessed... things.
But one doll has stood out; debuting in 1959 in a zebra swimsuit was Mattel's answer to gender profiling, and child of the deceased Ruth Handler: Barbie.
Boomstick: Oh, don't get confused; Barbie comes in many races aside from a blonde, White woman. She has other nationalities, just like how she has other jobs aside from a swimmer or a fashion model.
Wiz: According to an official Barbie website, Barbie has over *250* professions. And those include Olympic sports and the fields of STEM.
Background
- Full name in films: Barbie "Malibu/Millicent" Roberts
- Age: Varies (usually depicted as a teenager)
- Official girlfriend to Ken Carson
- Older Sister to Skipper, Stacie & Chelsea
- Daughter to George & Margaret Roberts
- Favorite Color: Pink
- Appeared in Toy Story 2 & 3
- Occupation: Actress, Artist, Astronaut, Ballerina, Boxer, Cashier, Chef, Circus performer, Detective, Doctor, Entrepreneur, Fashion designer, Fire Fighter, Figure skater, Flight attendant, Game designer, Horseback-Rider, Judge, Magician, Musician, News anchor, Olympic athlete, Photographer, President, Princess, Police Officer, Robotics engineer, Racecar driver, Singer, Surfer, Surgeon, Teacher, Tour Guide, U.S. Air Force/Army/Marine/Navy Soldier, Veterinarian, Zoologist, & 214 more
Boomstick: Since everyone is more familiar with the Caucasian blonde, we will be using that Barbie. But don't worry; since this version's a staple of the whole brand, she is automatically akin with every Barbie that has every knowledge of mankind known to mankind.
Wiz: We'll be here all day listing all her professions, but in a logical sense, composited Barbie had to have gone through repetitive, life-draining, painstaking training and college studies to gain understanding of medicines, wildlife to the point of being able to COMMUNICATE with animals, film, expertise in gymnastics and acrobatics, musical instruments, dancing to the point where she's able to perform during an earthquake,
horseback-riding and Pegasus-riding, and definitely singing; Her pipes are so strong, it made an island in the sky shake!
(7:09)
Boomstick: BORING! Barbie is not only a Boxer, 
but is an Olympic karate-ist! The sport incorporates three main martial arts training: kihon, kata, and kumite or Yakusoku.
She is also a fortune teller 
and an explorer/treasure-hunter, too! 
Believe it or not, Barbie has been in the F#CKING MILITARY! She knows various survival skills, tracking, hunting, shooting, more combat techniques, and the physical and mental strength to persevere like a true soldier.
Wiz: But since, she is a doll, it is safe to say Barbie is artificially designed or programmed. Her intelligence should match-if not surpass-that of her boyfriend, Ken, who in Life in the Dreamhouse is an inventor responsible for building several robotic copies of Barbie, one of which had artificial intelligence and could manage to be more talented than the original.
Boomstick: Luckily, though, the OG Barbie still managed to trick her.
Wiz: Ken also created Closet - a robot that has complete control of the Dreamhouse's electronic functions, including its security system.
Boomstick: Hm... I wonder if Barbie's still running that Technical Institute. I'm capable of getting another job.
I trust Barbie! She was so successful in her music career, she and her band were trusted with their own space shuttle!
Wiz: But beyond that, to this day, Barbie has had so far 6 shows and 43 movies, in which she played different people.
Boomstick: She has been in fairytales, was a fairy, herself, has swam underwater as a mermaid, has been a princess, ventured through the digital world and more! Or just hang out with her friends in Barbieland and the aforementioned Dreamhouse.
Wiz: Said Dreamhouse comes with a smartphone app that listens to and does anything Barbie commands.
Boomstick: Its kinda like Siri if she could manipulate the laws of physics.
Wiz: "DREAMHOUSE" can set Barbie’s schedule, announce reminders and answer questions on the fly. But it can also…you know… make stuff appear out of nowhere, change the house’s interior and others’ appearances, bring literal fiction to life, it was also hinted in a song that DREAMHOUSE can create an ocean and make stars from the ceiling.
Boomstick: In Barbie’s words: “All that you wish will come true.”
Wiz: But it is still a computer that has limits and can be overworked to the point of glitching out.
Boomstick: I wonder if Barbie still has to pay mortgage. Hell, I don't think her house is up to code. REALLY questionable when she can just build a new dreamhouse from the ground-up with a suitcase.
Wiz: Through her magical adventures came magical artifacts...
Arsenal & Abilities
- Paintbrush
- Magic Crystal
- As a Fairy:
- Flight via Wings
- Water Magic (Hydrokinesis)
- Wand of Light
- Necklace
- Can turn into a Mermaid, which grants:
- Swimming via Tail
- Underwater-Breathing
- Pearl Magic
- Mermaid Power of Water
- Can turn into a Mermaid, which grants:
- Diary
- Fan
- Zoolingualism
- Lyre
- Rapier
- Sticker Portals
- Keira's Microphone
- Princess Tori's Hairbrush
- Pink Shoes
- Alexa's Wand
- As Super Sparkle:
- Flight
- Super Strength
- Super Speed
- Sparkle Balls
- Telekinesis
- Heat Vision
- X-Ray Vision
- Object Restoration Vision
- Time-Stop
- Time Travel
- Freeze Breath
- Super Air Breath
- Magic Royal Scepter
- Spy Gear
- Rappelling Backpack
- Stealth Mode
- Taser Lip Gloss
- Mini Scanner
- Disguising Brush
- GLISS
- Motorcycle
- Hoverboard
- Dreamhouse
...such as her paintbrush from when she played Rapunzel. Anything painted with this-from portals to other worlds or clothing-will become real.
Boomstick: She has the wings and apparent water-control of a fairy. She can transform into a mermaid with her necklace
. During which, she can swim (of course), shoot water blasts as a Water Mermaid and control pearls, which can build constructs, lift objects or latch onto them, trapping enemies and styling hair. Speaking of styling, Barbie has Keira's Microphone and Princess Tori's Hairbrush; the microphone can change a person's drags and the hairbrush can change a person's hair. Only one of those makes sense.
Wiz: It seems even the least crazy of objects can be used in Barbie's favor. A rapier, which is a sword after all, and there's the GLISS-Gymnastic Launching Innovative Spy Stick; it can serve as a double-bladed weapon or tool, even as a pole vault.
Boomstick: With enough strength, Barbie with the GLISS was able to pluck out a gem that was electro-magnetically stuck to a device that was about to cause an EMP.
Wiz: But there's when she used a fan to blow magic back at her attacker, a magic lyre that shields her from magic, stickers that open portals to other locations, a crystal that protects her from all magic, there were these pink ballerina pointe shoes that led to another world and this diary...
Boomstick: Ahem... that diary can magically make any written desire Barbie writes in it come true.
Wiz: Barbie has wielded about three magic wands in her films, two but the most significant is the Wand of Light.
Boomstick: Forged by-and I quote-a "Measure of Courage, a Ring of Love, and a Gem of Ice lit by Hope's Eternal Flame", Rayla the Cloud Queen describes it as-I quote again-"the most powerful magic of all".
Wiz: This wand can break any spell or curse, and can even deprive someone of their power completely NO MATTER HOW POWERFUL. This was used to defeat Wenlock, who turned an entire kingdom's civilization into stone just because he was denied marriage. All of this stuff is for kids, no hate please.
But through sheer willpower...
Boomstick: More like "girl power".
Wiz: ...Barbie has resisted magic by herself, such as taking a blast from Laverna's ray. Laverna is powerful enough to take on Enchantress-ruler of Fairytopia, even surpassing the Guardians of Fairytopia.
Barbie also managed to break out of the Snow Queen's control, which causes her victims to dance under her command.
Boomstick: Did you see that one where Barbie got superpowers?
Wiz: Of course. As Super Sparkle, she can fly, travel at super speeds, shoot balls of... sparkle, 
and is strong enough to hold up the side of a cliff and crumble the top of a volcano. But in the motion comic "Be Super", Super Sparkle has demonstrated telekinesis, heat vision, x-ray vision, vision that can fix broken objects, freeze or blow away enemies with her breath, freeze time by holding onto the Earth's rotation and by - LITERALLY RIPPING OFF SUPERMAN - can travel to the past by making the earth turn backwards.
Boomstick: Before even becoming Super Sparkle, there was a comic published by Marvel where Barbie kicked a meteor away in outer space. And this woman was just a doll meant to encourage feminism in the work force.
Wiz: But that's not the craziest thing she has done.
Feats
- Saved her game world from a virus
- Swam out of Eris's whirlpool, which is said to be impossible to escape
- Resisted Laverna's polluting ray
- Resisted the Snow Queen's control of her movement
- Shook an island in the sky by screaming
- Stopped an EMP via removing one of its electromagnetically-bound gems
- Stopped Earth's rotation by holding onto it and rewinded time by rotating the earth backwards
- Restored stars across the universe
- Defeated Rothbart, Wenlock, Lydia, Laverna, Malucia, Eris, the Snow Queen, Clone Barbie
In Barbie: Star Light Adventure, there was a foretold prophecy that the stars across the galaxy would stop moving and the universe will be pulled into darkness.
Boomstick: But a hero was said to restore the stars. Who is that hero? BARBIE of course!
Wiz: By singing and dancing, Barbie managed to light up the universe. Now the universe is about 93 billion light years in diameter, light traveling across it all in two seconds; 4.4e + 26 m/s, making 1.4 quintillion c. Since we see Barbie moving across the universe in a wave of light, she must be moving at speeds millions of times past the speed of light.
(Boomstick pulls out a calculator.)
Boomstick: And the movie did say *all* stars, right? Including the Sun.
Wiz: Suns are stars. But yep. And they can have an energy of 44 quadrillion; 4.4 x 1016 watts.
Boomstick: Uha. And in the universe there's about what uh septillion stars.
(Boomstick presses buttons on calculator.)
Multiplying the Sun's energy with the number septillion, Barbie is reforming a total energy of 7.692e+50 Joules.
Wiz: Hm. Good job, Boomstick.
(Boomstick takes out a Goddess of the Galaxy Barbie doll and starts hugging it.)
Boomstick: Barbie is god!
Wiz: But Margot Rob- ahem, I mean Barbie's true character-defining feat was self-discovery.
Boomstick: It all started in Barbieland; Barbie was experiencing a psychological connection with a mother from our world. So she and Ken traveled to said world and, long plot short, Ken developed an epiphany and brought along male-superiority back over to Barbieland, where all the Kens took over.
Wiz: All of the Barbies did get their power back, fortunately. But overall, the morale of this new adventure was that Barbie's whole existence was about symbolizing female power in the work force and life in general. But she figured out that rather than being an idea, she needed to live in the real world and actually express herself and her ideals. THAT is true feminism.
Boomstick: Barbie's doing just fine as a human woman. Always a good idea to see your gynaecologist, girls!
Interlude[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set and we ran the data through all possibilities.
Boomstick: LIGHTS! CAMERA! It's time for a DEATH BATTLE!
Before Fight[]
Above the Sparkle Theater, the night sky is lit up by the multi-colored explosions of fireworks; the building’s own bright lights and searchlights help the occasion. What occasion might that be?
Why, a new show was taking place in this hall of entertainment! It is called "The Beautiful & the Deadly!"
Evidenced by posters, this feature starred the Ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom–Princess Peach Toadstool, and the face and model of Mattel–Barbie Millicent Roberts. The Theets (citizens of the island the theater was set in) enter through the theater's three doors.
They sit in the theatre. The curtains have not yet risen, meaning the show has yet to begun. But after all the seats in the room were taken, drumrolls begun, the lights faded, and the curtains started to rise...
The play so far seems to be taking place inside of a dojo. Both of the main stars kneel at opposite sides with their eyes closed. Peach is wearing her Kung Fu costume, while Barbie is wearing her karate uniform, along with pink sparring gloves and head gear. Suddenly, both actresses' eyes open before they rush at each other!
FIGHT![]
Peach jumps and tries to roundhouse kick Barbie, who blocks the attack with her arm. Barbie retaliates with a knee strike to Peach’s chin, but she leans back. Barbie uses this opening to ready her fist and fall, aiming for Peach’s face. Peach moves out of the way in time, making Barbie punch the floor. She foot-sweeps Peach. But while in the air she grabs Barbie with both legs, trapping in a leg lock.
Barbie escapes via the strength of her own legs. Both young women stand, facing and staring each other down. Peach delivers a quick slap to Barbie’s cheek, leaving a red, hand-shaped mark. Peach raises her other hand for a second slap, but Barbie blocks this one and retaliates with her own slap to Peach’s cheek.
What came next were the two exchanging slaps to each others’ faces for the next five seconds.
Peach would push Barbie to the ground.
Barbie: OW! Hey!
Peach jumps backwards. She starts twirling. Her sparkle ribbon too twirls around her body, making the ribbon itself and Peach’s whole costume glow a light blue. She was then fully illuminated by blinding light.
Barbie covers her eyes with her arm. When the light disappears, she lowers it, and looks in awe at Princess Peach now wearing a Swordfighter costume. She points her rapier at Barbie. She only gives a daring smile, however, as she had her own weapon: a pink, sparkling… microphone? As she raises the out-of-place device, pink sparkles surround Barbie’s outfit; her gi and karate gear are replaced with her Musketeers outfit. She raises her own rapier towards Peach.
Both swordswomen dash towards each other. Their swords clash and now crossed, both soldiers smile at their challenger.
Unbeknownst to Barbie, though, Peach was holding a Fire Flower behind her back. She crushes the Power-Up, turning her costume white and red, and her blade is lit on fire.
Barbie was surprised at the sight.
Barbie: Hey, you got nice style!
Peach: Oh, uh… thanks?
Abruptly, Barbie ducks and foot-sweeps Peach, making her fall to the floor. Barbie swings her rapier downward, but Peach lifts both her feet, blocking the sword with her boots. She shoots a fireball from her palm. But Barbie dodges, the projectile hitting the roof, instead. Peach kicks herself back on her feet and swings with the fiery blade. Barbie blocks the attack with her own sword. The clash emits sparks. She swings at Peach, who, too, swings. Larger sparks hit wooden structures of the dojo, lighting them on fire.
Peach hops backwards. At first, Barbie is confused until four floating cameras surround both of them.
Barbie smiles as she jumps up and down in excitement.
Barbie: Photos?! I lo-ah-ove photos!
The cameras flash at Barbie. A giant, empty picture frame covered the floor. Barbie didn’t move, meanwhile; she seemed frozen in place.
Using this to her advantage, Peach quickly pulls out her tennis racket from her jacket. She creates a fireball in her free hand; she tosses it in the air before hitting it with the racket, like a tennis ball. Instead of aiming for Barbie, the fireball was directed at the wall; it bounces out, then hits another wall, then the floor, then the roof above Barbie’s head before dropping down. Suddenly, the clever doll model hopped to the side, letting the fireball hit the floor.
Peach was in awe! She looked at her watch; it hadn’t even been five seconds before “Freeze Frame!” wore off!
This was getting insulting now! Barbie fooling Peach, dodging everything she had so far. Small, cartoon fumes puff from the top of Peach’s head as she grits her teeth. Her whole body literally burns with rage. The blazing figure of a now angry Princess stomps forward, creating a small earthquake.
Barbie had to hop in order to not fall.
Peach couches down and digs her hands into the floor, pulling out a Mega Mushroom. She takes a bite of the blinking fungi, causing her to grow in size, her head almost touching the roof. Due to her body emitting fire, this action burnt the dojo more. Crouching down, Peach was going to grab Barbie, but she was already sinking into the floor through a sparkling, pink portal.
At that moment, debris started to fall. Princess Peach screams as the dojo crumbles on top of her.
Peach climbs out of the ruins, unscathed aside from ash on her face and torn clothes. She sees Barbie finishing painting skyscrapers on a brick wall. She turns to her surviving enemy…
Barbie: Bye-bye.
…before jumping into the picture. As she does, the same portal sound effect from Super Mario 64 plays. Peach follows suit; the sound effect plays again.
Appearing in the middle of the road of New York City, Peach looks around for that tricky Barbie. The revving of a motorcycle grows closer. Peach backflips to avoid being hit with a pink stick. That was Barbie in her Spy uniform riding past her on her motorcycle after attempting to swing at her with the GLISS.
Peach looks behind her. She looks in excitement at the Bell Shop. The sign had the picture of the Super Bell and Lucky Bell side-by-side.
Barbie is still driving down the road, not knowing Cat Peach was chasing her, running on the surface of a building. She turns left at a building, which Peach jumps on and clings to the surface of. She then proceeds to jump on more buildings to catch up to Barbie.
She jumps, attempting to pounce on Barbie. She expected this, however, as she quickly turns and points her Taser Lip Gloss. Surprised, Peach quickly turns into a statue; the conductive metal protects her from the electricity. She knocks Barbie off her bike, letting it continue to drive forward and hit a street light.
Barbie recovers back on her feet and arms her dual-bladed GLISS. Peach raises her claws.
Peach: [ROARS LIKE A TIGER]
Barbie: Here Kitty Kitty.
Peach strikes first, slashing at Barbie, who blocks it with the GLISS. She kicks at Peach, who ducks and dashes at Barbie, hitting head-first into her stomach and providing an opening to slash at her again. Barbie holds onto her side, leaving tears in her outfit.
Barbie: Aw, this is expensive!
She looks up, but is too late to react before Peach hits her with Perry the Parasol, launching her into the atmosphere!
Flying over the ocean, Barbie used her Magic Royal Scepter to fix the rip in her suit. She notices the large body of water underneath her.
Barbie: OH!
She holds her seashell necklace as she plummets into the ocean.
Now also underwater is Princess Peach, riding inside of Perry, who has taken the form of a submarine. They encounter Barbie in mermaid form, who summoned an enormous octopus using her scepter. The feral cephalopod grabs the relatively tiny Subrella with just two of its tentacles, restraining Peach from escaping. In this dire situation, the brave Princess’s eyes glow peach pink with red hearts replacing her pupils.
A sheep wearing scuba gear is poofed out of nowhere. With this land creature’s arrival, the octopus mysteriously begins to feel sleepy; its eyes struggle to stay open. The tentacles go limb as the octopus is forced into a deep slumber. Three more of the same sheep appear around Barbie, but she remains awake? No matter; Peach summons bombs! Barbie shrieks, closes her eyes, and reaches behind her as they explode.
The blast creates black smog.
The music of a lyre plays.
Peach’s ribbon swirls around Perry the Subrella, making him glowing. Emitting from the blue sparkles was Mermaid Peach!
By the sound of her angelic, operatic singing, schools of fish from afar rush to the Sea Princess’s aid. One of the fish picks an Ice Flower from off a rock with its mouth.
The smog clears, revealing Barbie playing her magic lyre that created a barrier that protected her from the blast.
Schools of fish circle around the singing Peach and Barbie still playing the lyre, individually surrounding the opponents. Blue light seeps through the openings of Barbie’s fish-made sphere. Shortly, the fish are all blown away by a burst of water.
Barbie: Sorry! Sorry! Trying to focus on a fight here!
While the Water Mermaid Barbie is distracted, the other sphere of fish opens up to reveal Ice Mermaid Peach. Her palm faces the back of Barbie’s head, emitting fumes. The fish swim beneath Peach’s feet. They lift her up to the surface.
Above the water, Peach aims her hand downward, releasing a ray of frost that freezes all of the ocean.
She twirls her ribbon around herself, altering her appearances into that of a figure skater. She lands on the icy surface, twirling afterward.
The graceful Princess ceases her show as mysterious cracks begin to break the ice. Eventually, swarms of pearls burst out of the frozen floor. A pillar of pearls also bursts out with Barbie in her figure skater outfit posing at the top before falling and perfectly landing in front of Peach.
Smiling at her admittedly impressive opponent, Peach spreads her arms, snowflakes appearing in her hands. Barbie, also smiling, makes pearls levitate above her hands.
From here, the scene was like that of a fantastical performance – both performers proceed to skate, occasionally shooting their own projectiles at each other and/or dodging, all actions in sync with the music; the pearls continue to shoot out of the water like fountains; to make the moment more wonderful, it was all under the moonlight.
When their projectiles start hitting each other–the pearls being frozen–Barbie again takes out her scepter and summons three soccer balls, which she kicks towards Peach.
Her eyes again turn, making the balls halt and levitate in place. Both Peach and the soccer balls rocket into the air. She sprouts angel wings, and the ball lines up in front of her. Pink light illuminates from her being. She proceeds to kick the three balls, all splitting into three.
Seeing this, Barbie raises her hand, making a wall of pearls rise from out of the ice to block all eight soccer balls. In the meantime, pearls break off the structure due to the force of the blasts.
Behind the breaking wall, Barbie holds a sticker that is shaped like her head.
The ninth ball manages to finally shatter the wall; pearls scattering everywhere. All the pearls fall, actually.
Peach floats back to the ground.
What remained of Barbie was another pink portal.
Peach: Again??
The Princess pokes her head out of the portal. Looking around her surroundings, it looked like she was in a house or a mansion. She pulls herself out. She smiles and nods at the well-kept decor.
The screen next to Peach suddenly turns on, revealing the face of the house’s computer AI: DREAMHOUSE.
DREAMHOUSE: Hello, intruder.
The interior of the house magically turns into a rainforest forest; grass grows on the floor, trees are summoned, the sound of animals can be heard in the background.
Done with playing these games, Peach changes into her ninja costume and pulls out her Grenaduck. She sneaks through the tall grass, holding a grass prop in one hand and the explosive in the other. Hearing a branch snap, she swiftly turns and throws the lethal duck before dropping and taking cover in a bush.
The fake rubber duck hops two times after being thrown; on the second, it explodes, launching a Rabbid who was hiding in the grass into the air. A *hiss* sounds from above a tree. Peach looks up and sees a giant snake seemingly attempting to swallow her whole. She quickly stabs the side of its head with her kunai.
A shadow swiftly flies over Peach. She looks up to see Super Sparkle–well, Barbie in her superhero costume.
Barbie: (gasps) You monster! She only wanted to say hey!
Barbie’s fists sparkle pink.
Peach aims her Boomshot at the flying Barbie, who uses another wand to turn the shotgun-like weapon into butterflies. In surprise, Peach backs up and accidentally steps on the most dangerous Power Up from her series: the Wonder Flower.
Peach: Oh no…
Barbie: What’s wro-
A wave of blue sparkle is released, warping the jungle’s environment: the trees and clouds grow eyes and wiggle, the sky turns from light blue to dark blue, and the grass turns into springs. Since Peach is currently standing on some, she is launched into the sky. Barbie takes this chance to aim her sparkling fingers (gesturing a gun) after her.
Barbie: Aim and…
But she seizes her shot as a blue sparkle lights up the dark sky.
It was Mighty Peach! She rockets towards Barbie from the atmosphere, emitting electricity from her gauntlets. Barbie resumes shooting her Sparkle Balls at Peach, who either dodges or punches them out.
Barbie flies into the sky.
Now facing each other, the two young ladies once again fight at close-range in the middle of this weirdness. Exchanging fists and kicks that were blocked or countered, and Sparkle Balls and electric strikes that were countered by their opposite projectiles.
The clouds look on at the spectacle.
While still fighting, Barbie calls out to DREAMHOUSE.
Barbie: Uhm… DREAMHOUSE? If you’re there, could I have some helpful… falcons?
Five falcons poof into reality out of thin air. But, due to the Wonder Flower’s influence, the falcons transform into MISSILES before rocketing towards the fight. Both women dodge the animal-like projectiles. With both hands, Barbie creates a bigger Sparkle Ball and throws it at the missiles, entrapping them inside the sphere, making them float in place.
Barbie: DREAMHOUSE, make it ra-
Before Barbie could finish her request, Peach punches her in the face and grabs her in a chokehold.
Peach: Rain meteors!
At Peach’s request, a meteor- no, scratch that, a BULLET BILL shower ensues. Still having a hold of Barbie, Peach flies towards one of the angry homing projectiles. She lifts Barbie over her head to use as a human shield. However, Barbie blows the giant bullet-with-a-face away with her super breath. Barbie elbows Peach’s stomach, loosening her grip and allowing her to escape. She throws another Sparkle Ball at Peach, trapping her in another one of her floating spheres. Down below, Barbie separates the entrapped missiles.
Barbie: See those scary bullies in the sky? Get ‘em!
At command, the missiles rocket towards the Bullet Bills and Peach.
Peach: I need a Super Star!
Magically, that same eyed star appears in Peach’s hands. However, the stress of all the madness present was breaking DREAMHOUSE.
DREAMHOUSE: Gl - [static] - 2 - [static] - help!
Peach crushes the star. She starts flashing colors. Now imbued with the power of invincibility, the Mighty, Invulnerable braces for impact.
Meanwhile, Barbie uses her magic paintbrush to paint into reality a purple staff with a crystal on its top – this is the Wand of Light!
One of the missiles hits Peach, but of course, she is unharmed. All the other missiles fly up towards the remaining Bullet Bills; they create massive explosions on impact, the shockwaves clearing the sky of their clouds (killing them, technically) and changing the sky’s color to orange. Peach dives towards Barbie, electric fist at the ready. Barbie holds the Wand with both hands; a pink force field is formed around her. This causes the jungle to return to its original state, and sparkles start spiraling around Peach. Her shifting colors start to fade and eventually stop, permanently restoring Peach’s red and black color, and the electricity emitting from her fist stops, too.
Barbie side-steps, allowing Peach to fall and bury her fist into the ground.
Triumphant, her worthy rival points her rapier at the fallen princess.
Barbie: Finished, your majesty?
Clearly beaten and her hand still in the ground, Peach gets on her knees and closes her eyes, a sign of shame and forfeit.
The camera zooms out to show the Theets, who all watch in awe at the surprising surrender of the Mushroom Kingdom’s formidable ruler, fighter and actress.
Back in the show, Peach slowly raises her hands; her previously grounded hand holds some sort of band that is attached to a green circle with the word “RESET” inscribed on it. This was Earlier Times!
The sight of this climactic turn of events made the Theets jump from their seats and cheer in excitement.
Barbie is taken by surprise as Peach grows a daring smile.
The stage is covered by a bright, green flash. Everyone in the audience puts on sunglasses.
As the light fades, the current setting appears to be the dojo, where Peach and Barbie’s battle first began. Just like in the beginning, both actresses were wearing their karate gear and kneeled at opposite sides of the room.
Eyes closed, Peach smiles as she is attracting and absorbing blue sparkles.
This was because of the Theets–the audience–who were happy at the survival of their preferred heroine.
As blue light fills the room, Barbie opens one of her eyes. She is in awe at the sight of Peach ascending. The dojo starts to crumble around them, pieces of the building’s structure break apart until there is nothing but the floor.
The remains of the martial arts institution levitate. The blue light subsides enough to reveal Super Radiant Peach. She aims her hand at the frightened Barbie.
Barbie: WOAH! WOAH! WA-
She fires a beam of powerful magic at Barbie. Her being is engulfed in light and sparkle. In a short time, Mattel’s prized celebrity was incinerated, her screams of agony either frightened some of the watching audience, or made them cry.
The empowered Princess Peach–the winner of this battle and the hearts of her dearest fans–turns to wave at the audience, thanking them for the strength and support she needed.
Peach: THANK YOU, EVERYONE!
The audience clapped and cheered in satisfaction.
Now the play can come to its conclu- wait!
Is that a… giant Lady Gaga-like Barbie blending into the sky? Reality around Peach warps – pieces of the dojo turn to dust and blow away, and the sky turns to resemble the void of space illuminated by the countless number of stars. Planets appear out of thin air.
The confused Peach turns around to see the Goddess Barbie–Ruler of the Galaxy.
Peach fires her beam at the cosmic being, only for the ray of light to swerve out of the way and loop around her being back at Peach’s direction. She luckily dodges in time.
The Goddess of the Galaxy’s booming voice calls out to Peach.
Barbie: YOU HAVE FOUGHT VALIANTLY, PRINCESS OF THE MUSHROOM. BUT NOW…
She holds the Wand of Light in her hand, the crystal illuminates, restoring Peach into casual clothing excluding her brooch, losing her sparkle powers as a result. Behind Princess Peach opens a black hole that proceeds to suck her in. She starts swimming away with all her might, delaying her death to the vortex. The Goddess Barbie points her colossal, transparent finger, increasing the black hole’s mass and making its vacuum stronger. Planets and distant stars are sucked in.
Peach’s swimming proves useless. Eventually, her body is LITERALLY torn from her soul and is consumed into the vacuum of space.
Without a body, Princess Peach’s ghost had nowhere left to run and nothing else to do… but perish with no one there to revive her.
Barbie: YOUR TIME HAS COME.
The soul of the beloved Princess peacefully fades away.
The audience is silent.
The black hole shrinks and disappears.
Barbie in her space suit floats in the middle of what remains in the dark realm. She smiles and waves at the audience.
One of the Theets clap slowly… then another… and another. Eventually, the whole audience is clapping and cheering at this surprising climax.
Barbie one last time takes out her magic microphone and changes her outfit into a casual outfit. She descends onto the floor of the stage.
She takes a bow for her applauding fans before the curtains close.
Conclusion[]
(Boomstick claps and cheers in excitement)
Boomstick: Wooo-hooo!!! GO BARBIE!!!
Wiz: Ok, we're as surprised at the results as you all maybe. First, Peach had more fighting experience and stats that could match that of her two saviors
and one of the two's caretaker. 
On the other hand, Barbie never intends to get into a fight and would rather just chill and have fun, making her much more of a pacifist than Peach, who is willing to get violent if the need arises.
Boomstick: But, in real life, Barbie has chronologically lived a longer time than Princess Peach, allowing her to dabble in much more fields of expertise than the fair and fierce Princess. HELL, Barbie has lived to see the growth of sports and was trained in more than one fighting style, giving her an edge in experience and debatably intelligence.
Wiz: When you take into account Barbie is a game designer, she should know how characters and powerups like that of the Super Mario cast function.
Boomstick: Looking at her feats and scaling, Peach can survive building and island explosions, and she's strong enough to help clear out a storm or launch bigger enemies into space.
Wiz: In her universe, a durability scaling for Barbie we could use that comes to this level is when Ryan was launched into orbit after riding this giant slide (10:06). Given her doll roots, Barbie should be able to survive attacks to that degree.
Boomstick: Peach is fast enough to ride on a star, like Mario. But Barbie BY HERSELF shook a whole island in the sky with her screaming, can hold onto Earth's rotation, and lit up SEPTILLION stars across the universe, all while dancing across it. I can't believe I'm saying this-- Barbie could be stronger and faster than Peach.
Wiz: Peach and Barbie are both strategists; with their own brains and resources, and living around magic in their respective universes, are clever in taking care of business. Although, thanks to Barbie's admittedly playful demeanor, this prompts her to be more creative with the use of her situations.
Boomstick: Almost everything in Barbie's life revolves around magic -- her house, the schools she attends, her stumbling into random beaches of magic, her being a princess with access to magic, mermaids, fairies, her being a literal MAGICIAN!, 
yeah, Barbie knows what to do when facing magical opponents like the Princess.
Wiz: Given their equipment, Peach had the more destructive arsenal that, including power-ups and costumes that gives her more advantages, and her Heart Magic could heal her and effect any of Barbie's painted creations. But Barbie has equipment that counters all of them: her lyre could create a shield that protects her, her sticker portals could teleport her out of the area anytime she wanted, her microphone could be used to switch out Peach's clothes and take away her powers in the process, the crystal protected Barbie from Peach's magic,
two of Barbie's wands could transform Peach's weapons and do other things, there was her wider, unrestricted variety of super powers, and there was the Wand of Light to erase the powers out of any of her armor and the chaotic Wonder Flower -- if Barbie wasn't such a sport until going god, she could've just erased Peach's powers all together.
Boomstick: Barbie has shown in her battle with the Snow Queen that she is immune to controls over her movement, making her immune to Freeze Frame. Did we mention that Barbie was a fortune-teller and can see into the future?
Wiz: Speaking of events that would happen, what about her Diary?
(Boomstick takes out Barbie's diary from his back.)
Wiz: Where did you get that?
(Barbie in a lab coat runs into the scene.)
Barbie: OH! Sorry! That's mine! (whispering) Don't mention I wrote in here for good luck.
(Wiz was shocked; his jaw dropped. Barbie runs out of the scene.)
Boomstick: Oh, yeah. She just started ten minutes ago.
Wiz: Ahem, then there was Barbie's Dreamhouse. If Peace knew straight away what both the app and CLOSET robot were capable of, she could possibly have hacked into the system while in her Dashing Thief attire. And this has happened to the Dreamhouse before.
Boomstick: But one: doubt Barbie would let that happen again. And two: Peach was in Barbie's world now; if Barbie wanted to, she could wish for things to combat Peach like transform herself into an ACTUAL tiger to battle Cat Peach, or, or summon multiple Barbie clones to fight off duplicates of Peach, and given that DREAMHOUSE can change people's appearances, that would also help with changing Peach out of her power-ups, outfits, or forms. Also, if Barbie desires, she could've just summoned a sun to just incinerate Peach. If it wasn't for Peach catching on or that damn Wonder Flower making everything go bonkers, this would be a real battle of IMAGINATION!
Wiz: ...You're really into this.
Boomstick: Sorry. Playing with Barbie dolls got cool to me when I started playing with my daughter.
Wiz: Both fighters could turn back time: Peach with Earlier Times and Barbie by rotating the Earth.
Both could really do this at anytime during the fight with Barbie being fast enough to fly into space and Peach's option being more instant. This gave Peach the chance to just incinerate Barbie before the fight even started. BUT....
Boomstick: Turns out Barbie isn't restricted to a single form; even in doll form--which could be millions of her out there--Barbie knows of the real world, even her audience and what they expect of her. In the Barbie Movie, she even feels the thoughts of people who play with her dolls. HER emotions can even influence the real world.
Wiz: Peach and the rest of the Mario cast have fought universal and dimensional threats, but...
(Boomstick shows the Goddess of the Galaxy Barbie doll again.)
Wiz: Ok, I'll play! Taking this as literally as possible, Goddess Barbie controls the universe PERIOD.
No process. No building of power. She is already a god who has potentially already spread her influence to other planets with her dolls.
(With the remote, Boomstick switches the background's tv screen to show varieties of alien children playing with Goddess of the Galaxy Barbie dolls. Some of them making Barbie beat up a toy version of Princess Peach.)
Wiz: Barbie could scale to--if not surpass--Rosalina
, who shielded Mario and Princess Peach from a Big Bang and reset the universe.
Boomstick: Like I said, Barbie is god!
(Boomstick takes out the remote to the screen, switching to multiple Barbie dolls that have depicted her as a God.)
(The screen switches to a quote from Barbie.)
"No matter how small you maybe, you're big enough to fight a giant." - Barbie
Wiz: The Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom was a fierce opponent. But Barbie's creativity, years of experience, wider arsenal and defense, and being a cosmic being gave her the win.
The winner is Barbie.
Epilogue[]
In a lab, Barbie is pouring potions - one sparkling pink, one smoking green - into a cauldron. Lit candles are stationed around the dark room.
Barbie was murmuring something. Perhaps a spell?
She held a Super Star in one of her hands, and a peach in the other. She drops both of them in the cauldron. The liquid starts to bubble.
Rising from out of the weird concoction was... PRINCESS PEACH??? Fully dressed, healthy, flawless?
Peach looked around in confusion. Didn't she die? She looks at Barbie.
Barbie: Of course I would bring you back! You're probably more important and valued than me! Good job out there, Girlfriend!
Peach smiles as the scene fades out.
Next Time[]
https://youtu.be/ezQKeWisFIs?si=B4d0jQPAgIH1Dhca - made by JackOfAllTrades on Youtube
Trivia[]
The battle track would be titled "In A Peachy World" in reference to the song "In a Barbie World" by Aqua, only the word "Barbie" is replaced with "Peachy". The music would change throughout the battle to match the themes of the setting-changes.
Boomstick's daughter was brought up in Bill Cipher vs Discord on the actual Youtube Channel during Discord's analysis.
Barbie's quote means the common folk can be strong enough to rebel against a mighty and powerful ruler.
Comparison[]
Peach
+More serious
+More experienced in fighting
+Had the more destructive arsenal
=Strategic
-Could not affect Barbie with magic
-Less powerful
Barbie
+More powerful
+More creative
+More experienced overall
+More varied arsenal
+Resistant to Peach's magic
=Strategic
-Playful
-Dreamhouse could be taken advantage of by Peach