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Prince Charming vs Hans is a What-If? Episode of Death Battle, featuring Prince Charming, the villain prince from Shrek against Hans, the antagonist prince from Frozen.

Prince Charming vs Hans
  • END BRINGER NYX
  • Venage237
Season 01, Episode 11
Vital statistics
Air date May 18, 2018
Written by End Bringer Nyx
Directed by End Bringer Nyx
Episode guide
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Description

DreamWorks vs Disney! Shrek vs Frozen! A clash between two dashing and scheming Princes! Who will prevail and get the ending they long sought?

Interlude

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

Wiz: In every fairy tale ending, the princes always get their princesses and lived happily ever after.

Boomstick: Not all of them you know.

Wiz: Right! Some of them were robbed from their rightful place as main character of the story.

Boomstick: And some of them don’t have a chance in line for the throne. And of course, they were pissed off about it. I mean, who wouldn’t?

Wiz: Instead of seeking a rightful path or another princess to rescue, they surprisingly turned into the antagonist. Whoops.

Boomstick: Like with Prince Charming, the pompous prince-to-be of Far Far Away.

!Intro Prince Charming

Wiz: And the ambitious prince, Hans Westergaard of the Southern Isles.

!Intro Prince Hans 0

Boomstick: He’s Wiz and I’m Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle.

Prince Charming

(*Cues: Shrek 2 - Family Dinner*)

Wiz: Prince Charming, every princesses dream prince and husband.

Boomstick: Always gets his princess at every end of the story. But I’m not sure with this one, as he arrived late in saving his princess! Man. Talk about being sloppy! Or traffic was probably murder.

Wiz: Charming paid the price as his princess was swept away by another. He lost his place and the chance of ruling his own kingdom and became a laughing stock.

Boomstick: Poor guy. He was literally thrown in the gutter. What a waste of good face.

Wiz: This version of Prince Charming plays a more villainous role than his other fairy tale counterparts. His early childhood is unknown and remains a mystery, but he is shown to be the son of the Fairy Godmother, making him half fairy.

Boomstick: Probably explains why he got the handsome face. Which begs me the question, Aren’t fairies small? Then how does a fairy have se----

Wiz: ---Anyway! Prince Charming is arrogant, selfish and remorseless. Like his mother.

Boomstick: Are you sure that’s a Fairy Godmother Wiz? That’s not a Fairy Godmother’s qualities at all. That’s a Witch’s!

Wiz: Well, this Fairy Godmother also acts a villainous role than her other fairy tale counterparts.

Boomstick: What’s up with this fairy tale realm? Is it like an alternate dimension where the good guys turn evil while the monsters and crazy villains turn good?

Wiz: Why, surprising yes! Even Ogres are good nature and can be converse with. Same goes for Dragons, the Headless Horseman, Witches and others.

Boomstick: What the hell! My childhood is now completely whacked! I don’t know what to believe now...

Wiz: Prince Charming is skilled with a sword, horsemanship and archery.

Boomstick: Skilled with a sword? Really..?

Wiz: Err…Yes. Prince Charming practices his swordsmanship by using a long sword.

Boomstick: Well… okay. Besides that, he is also a great dancer, actor and singer!

Wiz: Dancer, I agree…

Boomstick: There’s a But isn’t?

Wiz: But he is a terrible actor and singer! Ahem. Regardless of fooling someone by pretending to be someone else, he is terribly bad at doing it. And as he likes to sing, his voice however is capable of shattering glass, which is a problem for the ears to hear.

Boomstick: Hey Wiz! Are you sure he’s the son of the Fairy Godmother? More like the son of a Siren!

Wiz: Despite his royal stature, he is quite agile and flexible, and is capable of adapting to the environment. He is daring enough to venture a perilous quest to rescue Princess Fiona, who had been locked away in a tower.

(*Cues: Shrek 2 - The Prince of her Dreams*)

Boomstick: Prince Charming traveled many days and nights, crossed stormy seas, endured through blistering colds and winds, scorching desserts as he faced and killed strange creatures along the way, until he finally reached the castle to where his princess lies!

Wiz: He climbed the highest room of the tallest tower and finally unveiled the curtains and---

(*Cues: Shrek 2 - Deep Fried*)

Boomstick: ---Find a gender confused wolf that told him his princess is already on her honeymoon with an Ogre! LOL! I mean, Ouch! Low blow!

Wiz: Shocked and devastated, Prince Charming went back to Far Far Away and told his mother that his princess was taken and already married, with her consent to an Ogre named Shrek.

Boomstick: How in the hell did he get back to Far Far Away?!

Wiz: Err… Magic I supposed?

Boomstick: He got back to Far Far Away as soon as he found out that he lost his princess? But why did he… getting into her tower took… I don’t know… freaking forever! What in the actual hell?!

Wiz: Well…

Boomstick: Besides… What in the hell is he actually doing all those years?! Saving other princesses?

Wiz: Ahem. Furious, his mother staged a plot to have his son marry Princess Fiona and be King of Far Far Away.

Boomstick: How’s he gonna do that? Challenge Shrek to a fist fight? God knows I wouldn't!

Wiz: Through a love potion stolen by Shrek and his companions. The Fairy Godmother was one step ahead of them and uses the opportunity to put her son in Shrek’s place, as the latter drank the love potion that turns him human and as well as Princess Fiona.

Boomstick: Let me guess… Prince Charming screws up the plan by blowing up his cover through his lousy and terrible acting skills?

Wiz: Yeah... The plan failed which resulted in the demise of his mother. Prince Charming having lost his mother and his place becomes the butt joke of the whole kingdom. Due to his misfortunes, he later performs/works at a dinner theater.

Boomstick: How the royalty have fallen… I know that feel buddy. I know that feel…

(*Cues: Shrek 2 - Muffin Man*)

Wiz: Despite having the heroic role in the play, he was treated like---

Boomstick Crap! Err---trash! Blaming Shrek for ruining his life, Prince Charming gathered his balls and recruits washed-up villains to conquer Far Far Away.

Wiz: In which he succeeded, as Shrek was absent due to setting out on a quest of finding the heir of the throne.

Boomstick: Prince Charming is no pushover! He got right back up after Princess Fiona head-butts him, manage to survive a falling prop tower on him, has quick reflexes and dodge incoming projectiles like chairs and glasses, is very persuasive, has good leadership skills, successfully trapped and captured Shrek and his gang, killed err---knocked out two mascots while rehearsing his role, dodge an airborne Pinocchio and is strong enough of getting out from an evil tree’s hold!  

Wiz: In spite of his achievements, Prince Charming is a narcissist and a momma’s boy.

Boomstick: That’s not charming at all!

Wiz: He is also cocky when he feels he have the upper hand, and a clever and cunning opponent can outsmart him away from victory.

Boomstick: Just like Shrek did!

(*Cues: Shrek the Third - The Show Begins*)

Wiz: Although Prince Charming gathered nefarious villains to support him in his cause, he was ultimately defeated by Shrek and fell to his death as the tower falls on him.

Boomstick: Uh… Wiz? If you looked closely enough, he escaped his death. I mean… Look! That falling tower’s window, is clearly open and safeguards him! Just like in the theater he previously performs at. How convenient!

Wiz: Well…That’s still debatable. Despite his egotistical attitude, Prince Charming will do anything for the sake of getting his own fairy tale ending.

Prince Charming: What?! Where is he mom? I shall rend his head from his shoulders. I will smite him where he stands. He will rue the VERY DAY HE STOLE MY KINGDOM FROM ME!

(A bird's poop lands on his shoulder)

Boomstick: That’s sign of good luck!

Hans

(*Cues: Frozen - Love is an Open Door Instrumental*)

Wiz: The Kingdom of Arendelle celebrates their Queen’s coronation and gives word to their neighboring countries which attracted many royalties. Among them was a Pri---

Boomstick: ---Prick! I mean Prince! Yeah! A chivalrous and charismatic Prince named Hans!

Wiz: Prince Hans Westergaard was the thirteenth and youngest Prince of the Southern Isle.

Boomstick: Which means his royally fucked in line for succession of the throne!

(*Cues:Frozen - The Trolls*)

Wiz: Being the youngest, he was constantly bullied by his older siblings and his father looks down on him with disgust and sees him as a weakling. As his father believe in the saying "The strong should pick on the weak" viewing Hans with shame, thus neglecting him.

Boomstick: Now that’s just mean! And I know how that feels…

Wiz: Hans grew up despising his family, resulting of him being cold and ambitious.

Boomstick: Without any chance of becoming King of his country, he plans on marrying into monarchy somewhere else. And it’s not like an opportunity was gonna pop up or anything.

Wiz: Word came of the coronation of Arendelle’s Queen into the Southern Isle.

Boomstick: Well I’ll be damned!

Wiz: After receiving an invitation and learning that the future Queen of Arendelle ascends on the throne without betrothed suitors, Hans being an opportunist, attended Princess Elsa’s coronation, acting as the royal representative in honor of his kingdom.

Boomstick: Don’t let his handsome face and personality fool you! This guy is a master deceiver and actor! Underneath that charming façade, is cunning, calculating, and power-hungry son of a---

Wiz: ---King! Hans plans on becoming King of Arendelle, as he sets his sights on marrying Queen Elsa. But after learning that Elsa was too reserved in socializing, he instead changed his sights on the younger sister, Princess Anna.

Boomstick: Being immature and crazy for love, Princess Anna’s heart was easily captured by Hans through his nice guy and singing act. Princess Anna falls madly in love with him the first time they meet and later accepts his proposal of marriage. On the same damn day! There’s a golden saying that says: Don’t ever fucking trust a stranger you just met and plan on marrying that stranger on the same day!

Wiz: That’s a bit…different from what I remember. Anyway, Hans change his goal into marrying Princess Anna instead, and later plans to murder her sister after their marriage to become King.

Boomstick: What a villain! Seducing a ladies heart and using it for his gain!

(*Cues: Frozen - Summit Siege*)

Wiz: After Princess Anna told her sister of her engagement, Elsa refuses to give them her blessing, losses her cool and---

Boomstick: Snaps! She went crazy and freezes everyone to death!

Wiz: She accidentally burst her hidden powers. To avoid any casualties, Elsa runs off to the mountains while causing eternal winter on Arendelle and freezing the entire Fjord, preventing her visitors and people from leaving her country, as well as trade.

Boomstick: Being stuck in Iceland, Princess Anna appoints Hans as temporary lord of Winterfell, while she looks for her sister in the Misty Mountain. I have a feeling that there’s going to be a rebellion when she gets back.

Wiz: Uh…It’s Arendelle and North.

Boomstick: Spoilsport. Hans momentarily rules ARENDELLE in its queen and princess’s absence. Of course, it was not long before the princess got lost in the mountain! Why in the hell the royal guard did not accompany their princess?!

Wiz: Probably at Princess Anna’s behest. As the winter got colder, Hans took advantage of the situation and gathered the people trusts, in which he succeeded. After Princess Anna’s horse went back to the palace without its rider, Hans fearing his plans will be ruined, gathered volunteers and go look for Princess Anna and her sister in the mountains.

Boomstick: Not like he needed volunteers to begin with! This prick is an excellent swordsman, in which of course he uses a long sword in combat. Hans is also skilled in archery, has great leadership skills and excels at horsemanship. He alone could certainly find Princess Anna, if not for his selfishness!

(*Cues: Frozen - Return to Arendelle*)

Wiz: He is resourceful and has sharp wit. Along with his band of soldiers, he ventured in an expedition through the North Mountain, fought and defeated the hulking snow guardian Marshmallow in single combat, fast enough to intercept one of the Dukes men from firing his crossbow at Elsa and successfully brought her back to Arendelle.

Boomstick: So he saved the Queen huh? What a nice guy! Not!!!

Wiz: Despite his physic, he is incredibly swift and agile as he is fast enough to catch and lift Princess Anna, able to evade Marshmallow’s strikes and is capable of traversing distances.

Boomstick: He also has a silver tongue!

Wiz: As he lacks in strength and toughness like his siblings, Hans constantly made up with his intelligence. Hans can easily adapt to his surroundings and situations even with unstable circumstances. He is incredibly good at lying, easily fooling others through deception and manipulating them to his own gain. He is also is good at seeing other people's weak spots and using them as leverage for his advantage.

Boomstick: This is one dangerous person! Is he really a Disney Prince at all?

Wiz: After reuniting with Princess Anna, and was about to kiss her to end the curse, he revealed his true nature and his plot to take over the kingdom of Arendelle, and left Princess Anna for dead.

Boomstick: That will bite him in the ass!

Wiz: After Elsa escaped her confinement, Hans seeks her out through the blizzard alone and managed to find and calmed her down. He lied to Elsa by blaming her of the death of her sister, which made Elsa drop her guard.

Boomstick: He almost killed Elsa, until her annoying frozen sister saved her from Hans’s blade. The sheer impact creates a shockwave that knocked down Hans unconscious.

(*Cues: Frozen - Treason*)

Wiz: After the Queen accepted herself and her sisterly bond, the cursed was lifted on Arendelle, and everything went back to normal.

Boomstick: But not for Hans! He almost became the hero of Arendelle until he let his ego blew it up! Hans received what unlike any other villain deserved. Instead of being frozen to death, the Queen and Princess were merciful of him. By only giving him a knuckle sandwich!

Wiz: The traitorous prince was accused of treason and was imprisoned back at his own country, working at the royal stables by shoveling manure as punishment.

Boomstick: What a shame. But at least he didn’t die like any other Disney villains did! So…lucky for him, he still had a chance at redemption…or revenge!

Wiz: Hans can deeply affect others through his words alone, as it is notably one of his weapons.

Boomstick: But due to his arrogance, he likes to brag about his plans to the protagonists, like that time he revealed his true nature to Princess Anna. He is also impatient and always rushes his plans, and possessed a bit of bloodlust through his ruthlessness, which can be used as an advantage or disadvantage. It depends really. He also becomes a bit cocky if gains the upper hand.

Wiz: Sadistic and sophisticated, Prince Hans will do anything at his disposal to achieve his ambition.

Hans: All that’s left now is, to kill Elsa and bring back summer.

Anna: You’re no match for Elsa!

(Hans kneel towards the dying Anna)

Hans: No. You’re no match for Elsa.

(Hans stands up)

Hans: I on the other hand am the hero who’s going save Arendelle from destruction.

(Hans leaves Anna’s side)

Anna: You won’t get away with this!

Hans: Ooh.

(Hans opens the door)

Hans: I already have.

(Hans closes and locks the door)

Pre-Fight

!Pre-Fight Charming vs Hans

Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let’s end this debate once and for all.

Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle!

Death Battle

(*Cues: Medieval Music - Black Wolf's Inn*)

In a crossroad, lies a tavern filled with ruffians and vagabonds. A cloaked man arrived on a horse and entered the tavern. He sat near the counter and removed the hood of his cloaked. The man was revealed to be Hans. The bartender gets him a glass.  

Bartender: What can I get you young man? If want some beer, then I’m afraid you better look elsewhere. Cause we’re out, thanks to that wretched dwarf and his band of hooligans!

Hans: Alright. Then I’ll have wine.

Bartender: Coming right up!

The bartender gets one from the shelf and opens it.

Bartender: Here you go!

The bartender pours wine on Hans’s glass while conversing with his customer.

Bartender: Hey? Why the long face handsome?

Hans: Hmm? Oh. I’m just, not feeling too good after my failed attempt—err…minor setbacks of taking over a whole kingdom.

Bartender: That's rough. I’m sorry to hear that.

Another hooded man arrived on a horse and enters the tavern.

Hans: Ugh… Rushing my plan was a stupid mistake!

Bartender: Well you know what they say. Slow and steady wins the race!

Hans sighs.

Hans: I knew I should’ve waited a little longer…

Bartender: Speaking of kingdom… I heard that---

Suddenly the hooded man interrupts them.

Hooded Man: Excuse me? Sorry to interrupt, but is this seat taken?

Hans: Does it look like it’s taken to you?

Hooded Man: Oh if that’s so? Then pardon me.

The hooded man gets a handkerchief from his pocket and puts it on the stool before taking his seat. Hans scoffs.

The hooded man sat beside Hans and removed his hood, revealing his handsome face and fancy golden hair as he waves it around.

Hans: (Showoff.)

The hooded man revealed to be Charming, Prince Charming.

Charming: What’s a prince have to do to get a drink around here?

Hans: Well for starters… He shouldn’t announce himself he’s a prince!

Charming: Oh really? Well, I like to leave my presence known, especially with the women.

Hans: Keep that up and you’ll get yourself killed.

Charming: Charmed. I’m sure.

Hans drink his wine.

Bartender: A prince you say?! Well, I’ll be! Then you’re in luck young man!

Charming: Oh? Why is that?

Bartender: Because I just heard a rumor that a neighboring kingdom not far from here was looking for suitors for their princess!

Hans suddenly choked on his drink.

Hans: SAY WHAT?!

Bartender: Yup! You heard me! The King is looking for bachelors to marry his daughter. It’s sad really, his sons are yet too small to rule such a vast kingdom, and her daughter is…well she’s a real beauty no doubt, but acts like a tomboy. I believed her name is Princess Meri---

Hans: That’s not a problem! How do I get there?! Tell me!

Bartender: Oh eager are you? Okay. Just follow the winding road from here and go left. It will lead you straight to a forest. Go further at the heart and you can see the kingdom right ahead.

Hans: Alright! Thanks for the info!

Hans paid his drink.

Hans: Here. Keep the change. You’ve earned it.

Just as Hans was about leave, Charming grabbed him by the shoulder.

Charming: Hold it! It’s a prince’s role to marry a princess. Not some lowly peasant.

Charming brushed aside Hans and walked towards the door.

Hans: What?!

Insulted, Hans grabs a glass and throws it at Charming.

Charming: Hmm? Oh!

Charming saw one of his shoes untied and kneels, as he hums while tying his shoe.

Charming: (Humming) The dragon goes under the bridge, through the loop and finally---)

The glass hits one of the patrons.

Hans: Oops. Umm…

Hans looked around and points another patron near him.

Hans: He did it!

Charming: (---through the castle!) There! Hmm? Pardon me sir.

(*Cues: Dragon Age Origins - Tavern Brawl*)

Charming excuses him-self and walks out the door.

Patron: Why you little?!       

The patron grabs a nearby chair and attempts to smash Hans. Hans ducked, as the chair hit another patron.

Hans: Ooh. That’s gotta hurt.

It was not long before a bar fight occurs. Hans manage to get out from the mess unscathed. But Charming already took off towards the forest. Hans hastily rides his horse Sitron.

Hans: (I can’t let this opportunity slip by!) Hurry Sitron!

Hans chased after Charming.

Charming arrived at the entrance of the forest.

Charming: Finally! At long last! My own kingdom to rule!

Charming feeling confident, entered the forest. He hears a horse galloping behind him.

Charming: I see. A competition is it? I do like a little competition. Let’s see who gets there first!

Charming reins his horse and gallops through the forest with Hans gaining behind him.

FIGHT!

(*Cues: Soul Calibur IV - Valiant Heart*)

Hans gets close to Charming and bumps into him.

Charming: What in the?! That’s playing dirty!

Hans: Anything for the sake of having a kingdom!

Hans bumps Charming again.

Charming: Two can play at that game.

Charming steer his horse and bumps back at Hans. Hans falls behind a little.

Charming: Hahaha! Feeling a little behind are we?

Charming feeling confident slows down a bit.

Charming: Take this!

Charming bumps Hans again, nearly rocking him off from his horse.

Hans: Whoa!

Charming: Aha!

Charming attempts to kick Hans, but Hans counter by using his elbow and hitting Charming, nearly dropping him off from his horse.

Charming: Whoa!!!

Charming managed to balance him-self and avoids falling off from his horse.

Charming: (Phew) I still got it!

Charming while feeling relieved, receives a solid punch from Hans to the face.

Charming: Owe! The face! Anything but the face!!!

Hans unsheathed his sword and slashes the saddle’s straps on Charming’s horse.

Charming: Uh oh?! Whoa!!!

Charming falls on the ground and tumbles while his horse gallops without its rider.

Hans: Who’s laughing now?

As Hans turns around and taunts his opponent, he was suddenly hit by a tree branch, knocking him off from his steed, Sitron. Sitron continues to gallop through the forest without Hans.

Hans: Ugh…

Hans got back up. Infuriated, throws his cloak on the ground and slashes the tree branch. He heard someone laughing from behind.

Charming: (Laughing) No need to blame it on the tree. It’s clearly the riders fault for not looking forward.

Charming continues to taunt Hans.

Hans: Let’s see how you fare with your sword.

Hans points his sword at Charming.

Charming: Yes... Let’s!

Charming throws his cloak on the ground and unsheathe his sword, but there’s seems to be a problem as his sword was stuck from its sheath.

Charming: Wait! Give me a sec, I just need to…

Charming struggles to get his sword out from its cover, Hans watches him with a dull face.

Hans: Really?

Charming: Almost there… Aha!

Charming manage to unsheathe his sword and does a pose as he points his sword towards Hans.

Charming: Now where were we?

Hans quickly close the gap and strike his opponent. Charming manage to defend himself. Hans kicked Charming. Charming grip his sword and swings wildly at Hans, to which the latter dodges. As Charming swings wildly, he hasn’t seen the pebble in front of him and stumbles into it.

Charming: Oooof!

With a thud, he falls on the ground.

Hans: (What a jester)

Hans smirks as he sheathed his weapon and turns around.

Charming: Where do you think you’re going? I’m not through with you yet!

Charming got right back up as soon as Hans turns around. Hans sighs.

Hans: Alright, but before we continue… You’re shoes untied.

Hans points his finger on Charming’s shoes.

Charming: Hmm? Oh?!

As Charming looked down, Hans quickly runs off into the forest.

Charming: What? There not?! Hey?!

Charming realizes his been fooled.

Charming: What?! You! You knave!!! How dare you fool me!!!

Charming pursued Hans through the forest.

Hans: (What an idiot!)

Hans smiles as he dashes off further into the forest. He stops for moment to catch his breath as he loses his opponent.

Hans: (Panting) Got to…catch my breath first… Huh?

Hans saw the kingdom as he realizes that he was at the heart of the forest.

Hans: (Panting) Hehehe… almost there… Just a couple more steps away to my kingdom!

Hans turns around and looked for his competition.

Hans: (Panting) And I manage lose that idiot…

From a distance, Hans heard a voice.

Charming: Where are you?! You knave!!!

Hans: (Sighs) Guess I’ll have to kill that fool.

Hans concocted a plan to murder his opponent, hides and waits for him.

Charming: Where is that knave?!

Suddenly, Charming heard a nearby bush rustle. Charming readies his blade.

Charming: I will smite thee!!!

With a dynamic action, Charming stabs the bush. Blood flows, as Charming remove his sword from the bush.

Charming: Hahahaha! I got you!

As Charming laugh victoriously, a large wounded and pissed off bear came out from the bush, towering him.

Charming: (Gulped) Mommy?

The bear roars at him.

Hans: What?! A beast?!

Hans gripped his sword tightly.

Hans: (This is just great)

Just as the roar stop, Charming screams like a girl.

Charming: Ekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!

Hans: (Ugh!) What’s that horrid voice?! Is a Siren nearby?!

Hans get his guard up.

Hans: (What have you got yourself into, Hans?!) Just my luck! I’m here in a forest hiding behind a large tree, waiting for some fool to come, surrounded by a beast, and a Siren of all things!

Hans takes deep breath.

Hans: (Get it together Hans, this is all sake for becoming king and ruling your own kingdom!) Yeah! That’s right!

With newfound vigor, Hans readies himself.

Hans: (Hey? Wait a minute!) Why am I hiding behind a tree when the kingdom is right in front of me!

Suddenly, he hears someone coming towards him and gets his guard up.

Hans: (Here he comes…)

As the footstep was near to him, Hans quickly gets out from his hiding spot to ambush his opponent.

Charming: OUT OF MY WAY!!!

With amazing speed, Charming bumps and knocked down Hans as he passes him, leaving Hans confused.

Hans: (What speed!) Hey? Wait a minute?! I’m falling behind!

Just as Hans stands up and was about to pursuit his opponent, he heard a growl behind him. Hans took a deep breath as he turns around and face a large bear towering before him.

Hans: My. What a big fellow you are…

Hans smirks, as the bear strikes him with its claw. Hans reacted and quickly jumps back from the bear’s strike. Hans quickly slash its paw. The bear growls in pain and continues striking Hans.

Meanwhile…

Charming: (Panting) Manage to get away somehow…

Charming realizes he run past his opponent.

Charming: Hey!?I just bump into that knave!!!

Charming readies his blade as he returned back towards Hans’s location.

Charming: He’ll pay for making a fool of me!

Back to Hans.

With his agility, Hans was able to dodge the beast’s strikes, and manage to stab it on the body. The bear cries in pain as Hans removed his sword. The bear wobbles but still have the strength to fight back despite its wounds.

Hans: You’re a tough one, you know that?

Hans began slashing the bear’s legs. The bear roars and attempt to bite Hans, but the latter sidesteps.

Hans: Big mistake!

With an evil smirk, Hans pierced his sword through the bear’s skull. The great beast falls down dead. Hans removed his sword from its skull and sheathe his sword.

Hans: And stay dead! Hahahaha…

Hans began laughing. Suddenly, he heard a familiar voice.

Charming: Wow… Bravo…

Hans: (!) Huh?!

As he turned his attention towards the voice, he was suddenly impaled by Charming.

Charming: You’ve let your guard down.

Hans falls down on his knees.

Victorious, Charming leaves his sword on Hans as he brags and circles his opponent.

Charming: I could’ve killed the beast you know… It’s just that, it scar--- caught me off guard.

Charming continues to brag.

Charming: You know… With your exceptional skills, we could’ve ruled any kingdom! But alas, you’re useless now... Fare thee well!

Charming turned his back on his opponent.

Hans: Heh…You need to practice more on your aim, Prince Charmless…

Charming: What?!

Just as Charming turns around, Hans quickly slice him in the stomach with his own sword.

Charming: Ack!

Charming, coughs blood and falls down. Hans mocks his injured opponent.

Charming: This is unfair! I’m a Prince! I should be King!!! Not some lowly vagrant!!!

Hans kneel with one leg in front of Charming.

Hans: That’s where you’re wrong. Prince idiot!

Hans stands up, as Charming looks up to him.

Hans: I’m a Prince too...

Hans smile as he revealed his identity, Charming’s eyes grew broader. Hans’s smile slowly turned into an evil grin as he lifts the sword up.

Charming: Wait! Let’s talk about this!!! Noble to noble!!!

Charming pleads Hans, the latter lowers the sword.

Charming: (Phew) I knew we could make an arrangement. Once I become King you’ll---

Hans: ---Not interested.

Hans slices Charming’s throat.

Charming: (Coughs blood) Ack!!!

Blood flows from Charming’s throat.

Hans: I’ll put your sword beside you. You do need more practice with you aim after all. Oh wait! No you won’t!!!

Hans impales Charming with his sword, Charming coughs blood. Hans further thrust it, impaling Charming and sticking him with his sword on the ground.

Hans: I figured it would look much greater on you as a grave marker instead.

Hans laughs maniacally, as he proceeds to walk out the forest. He looked over one last time at Charming’s corpse with a smug.

Hans: Why did I waste my precious time with the likes of you? I wonder?

K.O!         

Hans finally arrives at the castle. He fixes his looks and appearance and prepares his nice guy act, before entering its halls. While Charming’s lifeless body basked in sunlight at the heart of the forest.

Results

(*Cues: Olaf's Frozen Adventure - Score Suite*)

Boomstick: You know… I bet Hans would fit in very well on Game of Thrones.

Wiz: Charming may have been the suave and dashing prince, but Hans outshines him in terms of other categories.

Boomstick: Aside from Charming’s experience enduring dangerous climates, and facing ferocious beasts! He hasn’t shown how exactly great he is with his sword, while Hans displayed amazing skills with it.

Wiz: Indeed. Hans is a better swordsman than Charming is.

Boomstick: You got that right! And Charming have terrible aim in landing a killing blow too!

Wiz: Although both of them wore minimal armor, it helps them regarding with speed and agility. While Charming may have fast reflexes and reaction, his opponent is capable of landing a strike on him as Hans is fast and agile enough to swiftly close in the gap between them.

Boomstick: Not to mention way stronger too! He easily slices off a giant abominable snowman’s leg and avoids death by pulling his own weight!

Wiz: In terms of durability, Charming may have the advantage.

Boomstick: Yup! As both prick---err…princes takes hits from princesses, Charming survived a wall breaking head-butt!

Wiz: If we scale Princess Fiona’s strength, seeing as she inherits her fighting skills and possibly strength from her mother, who can easily destroy a wall with a single head-butt. It’s reasonable to believe that she is also capable of doing the same feat.

Boomstick: Meaning Prince Charming survived being hit similar to a wrecking ball and got right back up!

Wiz: Durability isn’t everything without the brains to back it up.

Boomstick: Well… Charming isn’t left out in that department, since he managed to persuade and rally up villains, and briefly took over a whole kingdom.

Wiz: You’re right Boomstick. Charming is not a complete goofball, as he is capable of concocting a plan and successfully executes it, and has even captured his nemesis.

Boomstick: Really? I’m sure I was just…

Wiz: But his arrogance gets in the way of his well made plans. The same applies to his opponent, but Hans on the other hand possesses an ability to easily adapt to situations. After his plan failed, he manages to formulate a new one on the spot and prepares an alternative, in which Charming isn’t capable of doing. Hans can also fool others by hiding his true motives through his fake and perfect acting, making him unpredictable.

Boomstick: And just like Charming, Hans also have amazing skills and charisma that could affect everyone around him and more!

Wiz: With superior swordsmanship, strength, speed and intelligence, Prince Charming can only hold out his bravado long until Hans had enough of it and decided to plunge a sword right through him.

Boomstick: Looks like this Prince Charming won’t be getting his own fairy tale ending. Again.

!Winner Hans

Wiz: The winner is Prince Hans.

Comparison

Prince Charming

  • +More Experience
  • +Better Stamina
  • +Better Endurance
  • +Better Durability

Hans

  • +Better Swordsmanship
  • +More Skilled
  • +Better Fighter
  • +Stronger
  • +Faster
  • +More Agile
  • +Smarter
  • +Unpredictable
Who are you rooting for?
 
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The poll was created at 04:02 on April 22, 2018, and so far 61 people voted.
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