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Pinhead vs Tall Man is a What-If? Death Battle written by BigShark81913, featuring Pinhead from Hellraiser and the Tall Man from Phantasm.
Description[]
Hellraiser vs Phantasm! These two humans turned demons have been gathering minions for many years! When these forces collide, which master of taboo will live to kill another day after a DEATH BATTLE!?
Interlude[]
Wiz: It’s always very unfortunate when somebody goes missing, but do we know if they’re truly gone? What if they’re sucked into a different plane or transformed against their will?
Boomstick: And these two horror legends are the pinnacle of dragging folks away and making them pawns! Pinhead, the former soldier transformed into a hellish Cenobite.
Wiz: And the Tall Man, the obsessive mortician transformed into the Lord of the Dead.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find who would win... a DEATH BATTLE!
DEATH BATTLE! opened the box, so Pinhead came![]
Wiz: In the fiery bottom of Hell, there is a being known as the Leviathan, the ruler of the underworld who is obsessed with law and order, viewing the human world as pure chaos and disorder. His servants were the Cenobites, extra-dimensional beings with no goal besides torturing humans for all of eternity.
Boomstick: Despite their horrifying cosmic power, the Cenobites can’t enter the human realm themselves. So, they rely on some unlucky loser to solve their Rubix cubes and drag them to their sworn enemies!
Wiz: These boxes, the Boxes of Sorrow, were created by Philip LeMarchand with a dash of black magic and murder and are said to grant whoever uses it their heart’s desire.
Boomstick: The puzzle boxes claimed many lives before LeMarchand dipped and left his Boxes of Sorrow scattered across the globe. It took a couple hundred years, but one very important person got his hands on the box: Captain Elliot Spencer.
Wiz: Working as a captain in the British Army during World War One, Elliot had most of his men killed in the Battle of Flanders and he began to question whether God was real or humanity was really worth fighting for. Once the battle was done, Spencer decided he was going to search for a device to numb his pain and forget about the tragedy of war.
Boomstick: Elliot Spencer trotted all across the world before discovering a puzzle box called The Lament Configuration. He solved it, and has his mind blown with thousands of truths! Spencer was dragged to Hell, shaved to an ugly bald, and had his head impaled like a pincushion. He had just become a Cenobite.
Wiz: Over time, Elliot began to jump the ranks of the Cenobites before becoming the Hell Priest. However, Elliot was no more, and the new desensitized demon was called Pinhead.
Boomstick: Pinhead wanted to punish people for making the same mistakes as him, so the Leviathan hooked him up to one of those boxes and had him ambush any sex-addicted nutjob who opened the box for infinite pleasure.
Wiz: To those willing to sacrifice their humanity for pleasure, he is an angel. But to people who want to live their life without painful punishment, he seems like Satan himself.
Boomstick: Unlike Satan, Pinhead has way more than the average demon’s pitchfork and twirly mustache.
Wiz: Pinhead’s puzzle box is called The Lament Configuration. Using this box opens a gateway to Hell, and any poor sinner dragged into it will be transformed into a Cenobite. It can also summon Cenobites from Hell to help Pinhead in battle and can fire a dangerous electric pulse. With Pinhead’s special touch, it can also turn into a crystal-shaped figure used as a weapon.
Popup: The Lament Configuration can also play music like it was originally intended too! Wonder if it can play Ozzy Osbourne’s Hellraiser.
Boomstick: His favorite weapons are his blinged-out chains. These flinging steel wires can be summoned from anywhere, attack victims at the command of Pinhead, and move on their own! Why doesn’t he just use them for chores?
Wiz: Pinhead’s preferred method for killing with chains is to rip his victim into multiple pieces with the metal hooks on the end, and they can also use detachable blades to cut victims up on the way back.
Boomstick: The Hell Priest’s pins are also very stacked too. They can increase his power tenfold and he can also use them as weapons. However, a normal guy can’t just pull them out of his head, only Pinhead can.
Wiz: The Pillar of Souls is a rectangular prism covered with the souls of people trapped for all of eternity. Originally Pinhead’s own prison, he now uses it to trap souls inside of the structure, with very little ways to actually escape.
Popup: Being locked inside of the Pillar of Souls is adjacent to being frozen in time and space.
Boomstick: Pinhead’s Cenobite uniform also has a lot of weapons stored inside, like an amputation saw, a drill, a chisel, syringes, and probably some century-old pocket lint.
Wiz: He has more random weapons, actually, like a cleaver, a knife, a sickle, a whip, a sledgehammer, and literal guns. There’s also the Terrorsaw, a decked-out chainsaw with hooks and a flamethrower.
Boomstick: Pinhead can’t always rock his goth gown, so he’s got his very own pair of armor. Specifically, Lucifer’s Armor, literally stolen from Lucifer himself! This suit can summon thousands of weapons, light itself on fire, absorb attacks, and walk on molten lava and thin air.
Wiz: He also has a blade to match his armor, the Harrower Sword. This indestructible blade stolen from a Harrower directly links Pinhead to the Leviathan, multiplying his power by thousands.
Boomstick: He just can’t stop stealing, can he?
Wiz: Alongside his weapons, Pinhead also has his Cenobite army. His “Gash” technically includes thousands of Cenobites, but we’ll go over the known group.
Boomstick: You know Chatterer, Butterball, Angelique, Torso, Wired Twins, Bound, Surgeon, Stitch, Pinocchio, Abigor, Balberith, Face, Little Sister, and Atkins… but do you recall, the most famous Cenobite of all?
Wiz: …there are also Pseudo-Cenobites, which are Cenobites created on the spot using Pinhead’s latest kill. This Gash includes fiery Dreamer, fire-breathing Barbie, photo-snapping CameraHead, CD-flinging CD Head, conjoined Siamese Twins, and PistonHead, who… just has two pistons shoved into his head.
Boomstick: There’s another sub-group of Cenobites that are basically his lowest lackeys, including the Cenobite Detites, Cenobite Dogs, Demon Dogs, Engineers, and a literal Cenobite Dragon!
Wiz: Aside from weapons and goons, Pinhead has a slew of natural abilities. The average Cenobite can regenerate from wounds quickly and suck blood from the floor to regain strength.
Boomstick: As we mentioned before, Pinhead can open and close portals to Hell. Only this time, he doesn’t need the box to do it! Even without his Rubix cube, he can create a dimension-traveling portal that he can use to gain entrance to the real world.
Wiz: Reversing what Boomstick just explained, Pinhead can also send people directly to Hell, meaning if he gets his hands on you, you could spend the rest of eternity suffering.
Boomstick: Once you open the box, Pinhead has full control over your soul. He can either tear it apart or let it free, but you know he’s not gonna let you escape.
Wiz: He can also play with your mind, whether it be reading it or place mental restraints and make you go insane. Plus, he can straight-up wipe away all of your memories.
Popup: Adding onto his psychic abilities, Pinhead can communicate with anybody anywhere, talk to his past and future self, and use telekinesis for throwing people, breaking things, and creating a protective forcefield.
Boomstick: Pinhead also has the powers of ZzzQuil and can mess with your dreams and sleep schedule! If you’re asleep, beware, because the Hell Priest can play with your midnight movies.
Wiz: Along with the other Cenobites, Pinhead can turn into a ghastly astral projection of himself and phase through things like a ghost.
Boomstick: Pinhead also has control over the elements, like electrocution and heat manipulation, the latter to the point where he can turn water into sharp ice with stabbing potential.
Wiz: He can also manipulate emotions, like making you feel every drop of pain you will feel in the future at once and make you feel a harrowing sense of fear.
Boomstick: His own blood is also a weapon in his hands! Pinhead can turn his body juice into acid and even rip the blood out of your body. Freaky.
Wiz: Pinhead has the ability to summon a huge cloud of fog with the ability of mutating any living thing around him and making every injury ten times painful. Even if he kills you with this, he can bring you back to life along with inanimate objects.
Boomstick: Pinhead also has mind-boggling higher level shit on hand too. He can erase his box from the memories of everybody, warp the fabric of reality, throw you in a time loop for all eternity, cast illusions, manipulate matter, and even grow to the size of a planet!
Popup: Other physical capabilities he has are tolerance to immense pain, enhanced senses and perception, shapeshifting, and power stealing.
Wiz: He also has multiple immunities against effects like sleeping spells, toxins, exorcism, soul manipulation, and even time and space manipulation.
Boomstick: Finally, he can… oh, oh my god.
Wiz: What?
Boomstick: He can get people pregnant with a gross little Cenobite baby. Oh god, I’m gonna puke.
Wiz: …the baby’s development is highly accelerated, growing in mere seconds.
Boomstick: Alongside his insane powers, Pinhead has done some really crazy shit as the Hell Priest. He has peeled off all of a person’s skin with just his fingertips, shattered multiple windows by yelling, derailed a subway train, and lifted a taxi with ease using his chains.
Wiz: All Cenobites draw power from The Leviathan, meaning that their power should be comparable to him. The Leviathan has the power to control Hell itself, and the Cenobites, including Pinhead, have also been stated to have all of Hell’s power at their fingertips. With amplifying strength from The Leviathan, he could create a 100 megaton blast of pure energy.
Boomstick: Pinhead should also scale to feats performed by his Gash, like Wormface ripping a woman’s face off, Angelique busting through solid concrete, and Moonface turning somebody into the moon!
Wiz: With Lucifer’s Armor, he should be comparable to things Lucifer has done. This includes him literally sealing the length of infinity into a finite object.
Boomstick: Despite his silly dress, Pinhead has some pretty impressive feats of speed too. He could rip a guy into pieces in the blink of an eye, catch bullets with his mouth, dodge shots from an assault rifle, and even scale above people who could dodge direct light blasts from The Leviathan!
Wiz: He’s quite durable too, tanking shots to the head and a giant gas explosion, but he also is on par with durable Cenobites like some that can survive a giant ship exploding point blank.
Boomstick: Being a Cenobite isn’t all sunshine and rainbows though. Every Cenobite power is nullified by magical trinkets and talismans, and reminding a Cenobite of their past life can revert them back to a human state. And, if his pins are somehow removed, he can become a powerless sad sack.
Wiz: His own box, The Lament Configuration, can actually be used to banish him back to Hell, and in most cases he can’t come back.
Boomstick: Pinhead’s weird personality also holds him back. He’s incredibly arrogant in many adaptations, which has led to his many losses in his movie marathon.
Wiz: Take all of this as a note: if you ever find a musical puzzle box, don’t try to solve it. You might just pay the price for all of eternity.
Boomstick: Hey, look! I found a cool little box!
Wiz: Boomstick, no, don’t open that- oh shit.
Pinhead: “No tears, please. It’s a waste of good suffering.”
The Tall Man finishes his game in DEATH BATTLE![]
Wiz: Death. Kicking the bucket. Biting the dust. Pushing up daisies. These all mean the same thing.
Boomstick: To understand what we’re poking at, we’ll head to a place that reeks of death: Long John Silvers.
Wiz: What? No, we’re talking about the mausoleum, where bodies are stored before burial. This mausoleum specifically, the Morningside Mausoleum, was run by the kind-hearted mortician Jebediah Morningside. Once the average funeral worker, he slowly became obsessed with the concept of death, or more specifically life after death.
Boomstick: Newly obsessed, Jeb decided to build the Dimensional Fork, a tool that would give him the powers to travel through space time and finally discover if the man in the sky gave us an afterparty.
Wiz: Unfortunately, Jebediah went crazy. He had seen too much and had his beliefs damaged, so he thought, why should he stay human when he knows everything there possibly is to know?
Boomstick: So, Morningside decided to flat-out conquer the world of the dead and begin drugging up corpses to become his little servants! Only, he was no longer Jebediah. He was the Tall Man. Scary!
Wiz: The Tall Man began to travel across the world, robbing graveyards with his Dimensional Forks. This device allows him to travel through different dimensions, alternate realities, and even back in time like in Phantasm IV.
Boomstick: It can do much more than just skip the waiting line, like burn the ground, amplify gravity, stun people, and suck anything into its grasp like a vacuum cleaner!
Wiz: With these forks, he eventually reached a sleepy little town in Oregon, where he would come face-to-face with Mike Pearson, the boy who would throw a wrench into his plans many times in the future.
Boomstick: Convinced that the Tall Man killed his parents, Mike followed him into the Mausoleum, where he’d get attacked by more of the Tall Man’s interdimensional army! Meet the Sentinels!
Wiz: The Tall Man’s Sentinels are his most iconic weapon. These spheres are filled with leftover human brains, and it follows a target until it latches onto their forehead and drills their brains out. Sentinels can be controlled from anywhere by the Tall Man, and they can even be shut off if they defy control.
Popup: Other weapons of the Sentinels are buzzsaws, explosives, lasers, shapeshifting, and even summoning the Dimensional Forks from wherever they are. Another piece of Sentinel tech is his brain remover, used to pluck out brains and stuff them into the metal balls.
Boomstick: Journeying farther into the Mausoleum, Mike would meet the Lurkers, who are basically just repurposed corpses hungry for flesh. They are much stronger than they were as humans, even being capable of withstanding the gravity on the Red Planet and kept in the millions by the Tall Man.
Wiz: Alongside his normal silver Sentinels, Jebediah has Golden Sentinels. First seen with the most brutal kill in the franchise, these Sentinels are more violent and powerful than the normal model, being capable of busting down doors and drilling through an entire body. If the Tall Man is ever incapacitated, then a Golden Sentinel will burst from his head and continue his chase.
Boomstick: Dodging hundreds of strange, extradimensional weapons, Mike eventually defeated the Tall Man, only to realize that it was all a dream and his brother Jody was dead all along. Saddened, the hero went up to his room, until, BAM!
Wiz: Since he is a collective vision rather than a physical entity, the Tall Man was thrust back into Mike’s life, smashing through a window and starting his corpse-stealing game once again.
Popup: Jebediah is moreso a vision passed from mind to mind, tormenting people in both their minds and the real world.
Boomstick: Due to his dream monster physiology, the Tall Man isn’t really human. He’s got gross yellow blood, and he has a slew of gross worm creatures living in his head.
Wiz: The Tall Man can also control any part of his body whether or not it’s intact, and he can slowly regenerate the missing limb. Plus, he can also mutate the body part into a ferocious monster that does his bidding.
Boomstick: He can also shapeshift, usually taking the form of women to lure men and do the deed with them, before killing them and dragging them back to his Mausoleum for brain extraction and dwarfification.
Wiz: Jebediah also has massive psychic prowess, harnessing the ability to lift and break anything with his mind, to the point where he could create massive earthquakes capable of shaking an entire town.
Boomstick: As you’ve probably noticed already, the Tall Man can resurrect himself from the dead, even when his blood was laced with liquid nitrogen and his whole face exploded!
Wiz: Returning from being seemingly gone for good… again, by creating a brand new vessel from the Dimensional Forks, the Tall Man continued his plundering of towns by entering the minds of Mike and Reggie.
Boomstick: That’s right! The Tall Man’s really good at messing with brains. He can move through millions of minds quickly, telepathically communicate with others, use mind control, and even steal somebody’s entire identity and probably use it to order dead bodies and leave untraced.
Popup: He can also force you out of your consciousness by speaking, making it so you are unable to move, speak, and make you hear nothing but your own heartbeat.
Wiz: The Tall Man’s dream manipulation makes it impossible to tell the difference between reality and fiction. Mike can never really tell what’s real or not, because while he has the ability to create alternate realities by dreaming, he has been trapped in a never-ending dream universe capable of disrupting the flow of the real space-time continuum. Since dreams in Phantasm are described as endless, the Tall Man’s dream creation can reach a universal scale, meaning that he basically has the ability to create entire universes inside of people’s heads!
Boomstick: Calm down, buddy. We have a whole analysis to get through, so don’t lose your voice ranting about the Tall Man’s brain taboo shit.
Wiz: …
Boomstick: Anyways, one of his alternate universes is a world where he took complete control of the world with even wackier weapons!
Wiz: The Tall Man utilized a mysterious alien plague to wipe out most of Earth’s population. This disease fills the victim’s head with the infectious fluids, bursting it in a huge wave of blood.
Boomstick: He also used what I think is the coolest trick he’s used yet: the Orbitals! These souped-up Sentinels are just as big as a football field and use giant lasers capable of splitting skyscrapers in half! His dwarf lackeys also helped him invade along with his other lesser-known minions, the Gravers, who are basically just normal dudes hypnotized into following the Tall Man. But hey, at least they’re stronger than they were before.
Wiz: Even though all hope seemed lost, Mike, Reggie, and a few other heroes stood up to the Tall Man and continued the endless battle against him in this dream wasteland…
Boomstick: And that’s it. That’s where they decided to end it. But hey, at least we have the comics, where Jeb has even zanier abilities!
Wiz: The Tall Man utilizes the Hyper-Dreaming Program, a complex machine that analyzes every last drop of the dreams of whoever is hooked up to it. Another piece of tech in the same set is his Virtual Dream Recorder, which drops you through various levels of dreaming before bringing you to your worst nightmare.
Boomstick: He’s not just a computer nerd here. The Tall Man demonstrates his other natural tricks like manipulating the elements, shutting off all sound, creating dimensional portals without his Forks, erasing an entire three story mansion, and even growing to the size of the Earth, a feat that would require a lot of power!
Popup: We are also introduced to the few beings equal to the Tall Man in power, known as the Overminds. While they could help the Tall Man in battle, we know very little of what they actually can do.
Wiz: While elderly, Jebediah has never lost his touch regarding his powers. He and his minions have dodged gunfire, his powers move like lightning when casting a spell, and he has survived multiple giant explosions like one from inside a car and one from an entire hill’s worth of grenades.
Boomstick: Oh, he’s MUCH faster than a speeding bullet, Wiz. Remember before when we talked about him crossing millions of dreams in seconds?
Wiz: Correct! Since every dream is described as an infinite universe, the Tall Man crossing millions of them in such a short amount of time places him somewhere in the infinite range in terms of speed.
Boomstick: And like always, he can’t even outrun, or out dream-travel or whatever you want to call it, having weaknesses! He used to only be human, after all.
Wiz: Due to fully adapting to the scorching heats of the Red Planet, Jebediah is incredibly weak to cold temperatures, stunning him and also disarming his Sentinels.
Popup: A lesser weakness is the fact that strong vibrations can weaken the Tall Man, but this is only on some cases because the Dimensional Forks operate on vibrations and Jebediah emerges from using those perfectly fine.
Boomstick: Plus, he’s fucked up enough to kill a dog. What the hell, Jebediah.
Wiz: Dreamers beware, because you aren’t safe in your own mind. The Tall Man will always find you, no matter what dimension he’s in.
The Tall Man: “You play a good game, boy. But the game is finished! Now you die!”
Intermission[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set! We've run the data through all possibilities.
Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A SPOOKY DEATH BATTLE!!!
DEATH BATTLE![]
Results[]
Advantages and Disadvantages[]
- Pinhead
- +
- +
- -
- -
- The Tall Man
- +
- +
- -
- -
Trivia[]
- The connections between Pinhead and the Tall Man are:
- Both are iconic antagonists from two long running horror movie franchises with cult followings.
- They have a very tall appearance with pale skin and black suit.
- They have a more sophisticated personality compared to other iconic horror movie villains.
- Both were once normal humans who after experiencing a war (WWI and American Civil War), became obsessed with taboo subjects like death and pain. They then discovered a portal to a hell-like dimension, which transformed them into the demon-like monsters that they are.
- Both come to Earth to kidnap humans to take them back to their world and transform them into their servants (Cenobites and Lurkers). They also aspire for world domination.
- While they have a variety of powers, their primary form of attack is using telekinesis to launch sharp metal objects at their enemies (hooks on chains and Sentinels).