Monika VS. Sans is a What-If? Death Battle featuring Sans from UNDERTALE and Monika from Doki Doki Literature Club
Description
Undertale vs. Doki Doki Literature Club! Two games with dark secrets and two self-aware characters. Now it's time to see if these two forth-wall breakers can destroy the other using their vast amount of skills and abilities!
Interlude
Boomstick: The fourth wall, a powerful tool used by the most powerful of characters in fiction.
Wiz: Some, however, don't take it all that seriously, however
Boomstick: Like Sans, the lazy, yet powerful, skeleton
Wiz: And Monika, the anime girl that's crazy for everyone.
Boomstick: He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armors, and skills to find out who would win…
A Death Battle
MONIKA
Wiz: Doki Doki Literature Club may seem like a cute dating sim with a couple of cute girls.
Boomstick: But when Act 2 comes around, hooo boy, that's when EVERYTHING goes to shit!
Wiz: Certain things in the game start glitching out, the game occasionally resetr s, and most importantly, the 3 girls, Sayori, Yuri, and Natsuki, all start dying and getting their Character Files removed.
Boomstick: Wait, Character Files? I don't really think those exist…
Wiz: Well, they do here, and they directly control each of the characters, and the one behind all of the ruins in this dating sim is none other than Monika herself.
Boomstick: Monika is the main character and club president of the game, also my waifu as well!
Wiz: You might want to think twice about that, Boomstick.
Boomstick: You tryna' make us break up or something? Leave me and Monika be!
Wiz: Well, Monika, in the lightest of terms, is 'clingy,' a bit too clingy, in fact. So much so that she manipulated the files of her own game to make the other girls in the game unlikable and eventually remove their Character Files.
Boomstick: It's never directly stated *how* she managed to figure out she was in a game, but I guess some things just need to be left unexplained.
Wiz: Thanks to her ability to manipulate the files of the game, she has many abilities to take use of. One of these being the ability to rewind time, having the entire world go to static as time moves backwards.
Boomstick: She can also make time go faster as well, well, at least the music at least, nothing really seems to change for the others or the environment, I bet the speed up music would drive you insane however...
Wiz: She also seemingly has a ability of Pyrokinesis, although she doesn't explicitly state or show her ability, fire can be seen in the background of Act 3.
Boomstick: She can also change up the lighting around herself, as seen in her TERRIFYING AS HELL JUMPSCARE JESUS CHRIST
Wiz: It's alright, Boomstick, it's just a game.
Boomstick: Mostly, that is…
Wiz: Most likely one of her most utilized abilities, Monika has the ability to teleport around the game at will. Such as the moment where she slowly forms in front of you while you were talking to Yuri
Boomstick: Ughh, Cockblockers. Speaking of that part, she can also make her self transparent, though it isn't stated whether or not she can control the physical world or not.
Wiz: And finally, easily her most iconic ability, Monika has the power to edit the game files and change traits of characters, objects, or even straight up delete the character files.
Boomstick: Geez, she seems like a literal goddess, editing her world and all that, I think I made the right choice making her my waifu, ain't that right, Moni?
Wiz: Monika isn't a perfect being, however, unlike what SOME people might think.
Boomstick: Oh, ugh, yeah, get outta here, Moni, she ain't perfect.
Wiz: At the end of the day, Monika is just an average schoolgirl, she isn't the most threatening person ever.
Boomstick: Monika also has her own Character File as well, which can be edited and deleted just as easily as the others.
Wiz: And despite what it may seem, Monika is a novice programmer at best, she isn't the best coder in the world
Boomstick: Should've spent more time on Code.org in the computer lab between periods, huh?
Wiz: Monika also doesn't have very much offensive abilities, either, aside from her pyrokinetic abilities, and even then, they aren't even confirmed.
Boomstick: In conclusion, although Monika may have trouble programming and has a bad case of obsessiveness, her ability to edit the files makes her a force to be reconned with. Now if you excuse me, me and Moni have a church to go to, Wiz, you'll be my best man!
SANS[]
Wiz: Ahh, Undertale, a timeless game about love, peace, and acceptance.
Boomstick: Despite this however, a certain character is always behind your back, one that is powerful, one that is… a skeleton?
Wiz: That's right, Sans the Skeleton. This lazybones has been making quite the rounds lately, with appearances in Smash Bros and even in wrestling!
Boomstick: Let's not forget his kickass theme either! Badabadum, Ba Ba Ba Ba the Dum!
Wiz: On the surface, Sans seems like a chill, laid-back type of person. He doesn't really fight a lot, and he's always on Frisk's side.
Boomstick: Don't be fooled by this skeleton's eternal smile, however, for he is POWERFUL.
Wiz: That's right, at the end of the Genocide route, Sans confronts you at the Last Corridor, in which he shows his true powers in most likely one of THE hardest fights in Undertale history, right up there with Undynes and Flowey.
Boomstick: I'd say he's been quite used to these abilities, considering the fact that he's experienced multiple timelines with the same events.
Wiz: His attacks and abilities include his signature Bone attack, in which Sans summons a large amount of tall, fast-moving bones that go straight into the opponent, and these hit hard.
Boomstick: Let's not forget, Sans is more a blue guy, blue sweater, blue eye, so it makes sense that he'd have blue bones, right?
Wiz: Correct, Sans can also summon blue bones that only attack the opponent if they are moving, if they stand completely motionless, nothing will happen, and the bone will pass right through them without any harm.
Boomstick: A glimmer of hope for League of Legends players.
Wiz: Sans also has the ability of Telekinesis, being able to carry physical objects with pure magic with the ability to throw them in any given direction, as his signature blue eye glows in his socket.
Boomstick: You think he has an eye infection in that socket?
Wiz: Well, he's a skeleton, I don't think skulls can get eye infections.
Boomstick: Well that's good to know, I bet it'd hurt having a literal flame inside of your eye socket for a while, youch.
Wiz: And arguably his most well-known ability, Sans has the power to summon the powerful Gaster Blaster, a skull-shaped laser created by the mysterious former royal scientist, Dr. W. D. Gaster.
Boomstick: These things can be summoned in mass-quantities and with varying sizes, wonder if they'd be small enough to fit inside your-
Wiz: No.
Boomstick: Joking, joking.
Wiz: Anyway, the lasers they shoot are designed to completely ignore all physical matter and directly attack the opponents SOUL, not only spiritually, but physically hurting them.
Boomstick: He can also teleport around anywhere, just in case he was too lazy to do the ever-so difficult task of walking. Guess that's why he refers to them as shortcuts.
Wiz: If he attacks an opponent with a laser, they get a status effect known as Karmic Retribution, or for short, Karma, or for even shorter, KR. This gives the opponent a certain 'poison' effect, making them weaker and take damage over time, it can't actually kill them, though. These abilities make Sans a powerful, powerful being
Boomstick: He's still human, though, he has his disadvantages, or would he be a monster? He's pretty human, shaped.
Wiz: He shares a common trait with other real-life skeletons: extreme fragileness. According to c him, Sans has only 1 hit point, meaning that even the slightest attack can knock him out for good
Boomstick: Thankfully, the chances of that happening are slim to none, thanks to his powerful abilities and, most importantly, his insane ability of dodging quickly, making it near-impossible to actually strike him.
Wiz: In conclusion, Sans is no ordinary jokester, as his powerful bone attacks and incredible psychic abilities make him most likely one of the most powerful beings in Undertale in terms of strength.
Boomster: You got that right, say, I'm thirsty for some hotdogs, how about we go to Grillby's?
DEATH BATTLE[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.
Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BAATLLLEEEEEEE!!!
FIGHT!
A large floating classroom is seen flying in the middle of space, inside of it, Monika is doing her signature hands-on-chin pose on the table
Monika: Y'know, [player], a much as I love you, I sorta regret deleting my friends. They were people too, they didn't deserve that fate… but, I guess that's the way love goes, ehehehe!~
Suddenly, a large bone shoots out from under the table, splitting it in half, Monika steps back in shock
Monika: W-w-what the?
And then, a short, shadowy figures appears behind Monika, Monika stumbles back in shock as the figure is revealed to be none other than Sans himself.
Sans: heya, you've been busy, huh?
Monika: Wh-who are you?
Sans: the name's sans, sans the skeleton, but i'm not here for hellos, i'm here for goodbyes.
Monika: What, w-why?
Sans: don't play dumb, you know what you did. there's been a source of a fragile timeline according to our studies, and it just so happens to be right here, caused by you.
Monika: Listen, I don't know who you are, but if your saying I'm gonna have to die, then I'm not going down without a fight!
Sans: very well..
Monika ready a battle pose as she teleports slightly further away from Sans.
Music: https://youtu.be/-BTrspwpooo
Sans: it's a beautiful day outside, birds are singing, flowers are blooming, on days like these, kids like you.
The music suddenly stops as Sans's eyes go blank
Sans: should be burning in hell…
FIGHT!
Sans uses his telekinetic powers to lift Monika up from the ground into the wall. Monika quickly teleports behind Sans in an attempt to kick him, he however, quickly dodges sideways as he shrugs
Sans: what? you think i'm just gonna stand there and take it?
Sans summons a line of tall bones as he launches them forward toward Monika, as she quickly runs past them before getting launched again by Sans' telekinesis.
Monika: There's gotta be his character file somewhere…
Monika quickly looks through the files of her game to find two .chr files: monika.chr and sans.chr
Monika: Perfect!
Monika quickly attempts to delete sans.chr, as shown at the top left hand corner, however, before she can finish, Sans quickly launches a bone into her chest, making her mess up the command and launch her straight into the wall.
Sans: don't think i don't know what you're doing.
Sans once again Carrie's her with his telekinesis and launches her into a bookshelf on the left of the room, causing booms to fly everywhere before launching her toward the other bookshelf on the opposite end, causing her to fall down onto the floor as the bookshelf topples on top of her before she can get up. She quickly teleports in front of Sans to slap him, only for him to dodge yet again.
Monika: That skeleton can't keep dodging forever, I have to keep attacking…
Sans quickly grabs Monika yet again with his telekinesis and summons a wall of sharp bones in front of her as he launches her towards them, before they impale her, however, Monika quickly reminds time to before she was grabbed as she quickly teleports toward the toppled bookshelf and tosses a load of books at Sans quickly, as he quickly dodges them flawlessly.
Once Monika runs out of books to throw, Sans quickly teleports behind Monika as he summoned a load of bones towards Monika, Monika flawlessly jumps across them until she lands on a load of blue bones, causing a sickening sizzle sound as Monika yelps.
Sans: didn't expect that, did'ya? might not wanna move on those ones.
The blue bones Monika is laying on quickly disappear as Monika teleports in front of Sans as she does a flurry of kicks and punches, all of which Sans dodges while moving backwards towards a door, in which Sans quickly dodges sideways and uses his telekinetic powers to launch Monika out the door and into space, before she can fall, she quickly grabs onto one of the curtains of the windows and teleports back into the room, as she uses the command 'Chillbrah2 (talk)give monika.chr door.pngChillbrah2 (talk) to give herself the door that fell from the room as she uses it as a shield to protect herself from a large array of bones as Sans fires at her.
Monika attempts to delete Sans yet again, however, Sans quickly takes the door using telekinesis to destroy it with his bones as he launches Monika up and down from the floor to the ceiling. Monika manages to grab the lamp hanging from the ceiling as she shoots a stream of fire towards Sans, in which he summons a wall of bones to defend himself with it. Eventually, the lamp cannot handle Monika's weight and breaks off, dropping Monika down towards the floor and completely making the room pitch black, save for some of the light caused by the space effects outside.
Sans then proceeds to teleport so many times in quick succession that it makes the illusion that there are various clones of him. Monika attempts to attack the 'clones' with the broken-off edge of the lamp, however it's no use as they disappear when touched. Sans then begins to use his telekinesis to launche Monika across the room rapidly. While being launched around, she notices Sans oddly sitting near a window away from the other skeletons. She gets the idea of running towards it, lamp in hand, dodging a flurry of bones to slash towards Sans with the lamp.
9999
A splat of blood shoots out onto the wall as Sans collapses on the floor with a shocked expression. Monika looks on as she stares contentedly at Sans. The music stops
Sans: heh.. welp… guess you got me that time. that's it, you win. guess you might as well delete me.
Monika comply with this as she proceeds to open up her commands and try and delete Sans.
Music:https://youtu.be/NJ6GGNQuVus
Sans: but, there's one thing i'd like to tell you
Monika stops to look at Sans, confused, suddenly, Sans uses his telekinesis to make himself float in the air, he then opens up his sweater to reveal a row of ketchup bottles in his sweater, all sliced in half.
Sans: skeletons don't bleed.
Sans then summons a bone that launches at Monika, pushing her towards a wall that she manages to teleport out of. Monika shoots some fire towards Sans, which he dodges and hit the walls, catching them on fire, revealing a large Gaster Blaster behind it and shoots a large laser directly at Monika. Afterwords, Monika begins bleeding a purple fluid as she struggles to get up.
Sans: heh, karma's a female dog, ain't it?
Monika jumps towards Sans as he quickly teleports to the ground, making her land face-first on the ground as she manages to get up before a large bone strikes up from her face. A large Gaster Blaster then appears which fires a large laser at Monika, luckily, she manages to teleport away in time.
Monika quickly makes some fire from her hands as she quickly leaps towards Sans who, of course teleports away, because she hit the wooden floor flaming fist-first, the floor sudden bursts into flames, catching Monika's leg on fire; in a panic, Monika quickly teleports around, flailing her leg around to put out the fire when Sans summons a long bone from the ground slightly in front of Monika, launching her upwards as he uses his telekinetic powers to launch her upwards.
Monika quickly teleports back onto the now burning room, intangible as she sneaks behind Sans, quietly using her commands to, once again, attempt to delete Sans. However, some of the fire from the burning wall behind her touches Monika's hair, revealing her as Sans quickly fires a large Gaster Blaster laser forward, because it was close to Monika, the pressure from the beam launched her forwards.
Sans quickly followers her, summoning and launching bones towards her, in which she barely manages to dodge as she quickly teleports and grapples onto Sans, teleporting wildly and unpredictably until Sans uses his telekinetic powers to launch her onto the room, which barely has any more room thanks to the fire.
Sans then summons a large Gaster Blaster as it begins firing at her. Monika manages to teleport on top of it, clinging onto it for dear life as it attempts to shoot at her, with Sans dodging it's unpredictable shots. Then, Monika opens up her commands and digs into the files to edit it's memories so that it begins to work for her. Suddenly, the Gaster Blaster's blue eyes turn green as Monika gets on top of it, with Sans using telekinesis to make himself float.
Monika orders the Gaster Blaster to begin firing at Sans, in which it attempts to by rapidly and unpredictably firing towards him, all of which Sans barely manages to dodge while firing out bones. Monika quickly grabs the last thing left from the burnt room, one half of the table, as she uses it as a shield to defend herself against the bones. The Gaster Blaster then yells out as it rushes towards Sans, in which he hopes on and tosses the table away, grabs Monika by the color, and begins slamming her head in with a large bone, Monika manages to teleport off of Sans' grasp and pushes him off to his doom.
Monika and the Gaster Blaster's 'victory' was short lived, however, as a few seconds later, Sans comes out and attempts to impale Monika with a sharp bone, Monika jump away in time, however, he instead impaled the Gaster Blaster, causing it to scream in pain as it deteriorates into dust
Monika, now in the middle of space, begins teleporting wildly in an attempt to attack Sans, however, Sans uses his telekinesis to launch Monika downwards, plummeting her faster and faster to the ground, Sans appears next to her, doing various poses before suddenly disappearing, Monika looks around in confusion before-
SPLAT
Monika gets impaled by a large group of sharp bones, blood oozes out of Monika as she slowly slides down the bones. Sans then teleports next to her corpse with his ha ds in his pockets.
Sans: welp, i guess her abilities im-PALED in comparison to mine.
K.O
*Sans is shown resting on a vacation chair as he sips on some ketchup, with Monika's corpse remaining on the bones, unmoving.*
Boomstick: NOOOOOOOOO, MY ANIME PROGRAMMER WIIIFE!
Wiz: As sad as it may seem, while Monika may have had the advantage in overall athleticness, she just didn't have enough offensive options compared to Sans, and couldn't keep up with Sans' endless flurry of bones and lasers.
Boomstick: *sniff* W-well, at least she's in my memories eternally… and she fought for soo long..
Wiz: What really made Monika survive for so long was actually because of the game she was in. She was lucky enough to be in her own game, thus having her able to easily skim through the files to find the .chr files of Sans, although Sans was able to keep her from deleting him.
Boomstick: Yeah, thank god Sans had the idea of confronting her in her own game, if she was in any other game, she probably wouldn't have lasted as long…
Wiz: The winner is Sans
If this fight had a soundtrack
Monika vs. Sans is a What If? Death Battle featuring Sans from Undertale and Monika from Doki Doki Literature Club. This is a remake of the original What If? Death Battle from 2019.
Description[]
Doki Doki Literature Club vs. Undertale! Which one of these two self-aware characters would be victorious in a fight to the death?
Interlude[]
Wiz: Whenever we indulge in fictional media, whether it be novels, films, TV shows, or video games, we'd always expect the characters to not be aware of the fact they are fictional.
Boomstick: Some, however, are completely knowledgeable about the fact they aren't real! Geez, you'd think they'd take the fact that they're essentially in a simulation a bit more seriously, huh?
Wiz: This is called breaking the fourth wall, and a surprising number of fictional characters do it.
Boomstick: But these two not only break the fourth wall, but completely demolish anything that's left of it!
Wiz: Monika, the literature club president turn psychotic character deleter.
Boomstick: And Sans, the skeleton with a bone to pick with the fourth wall! He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle
Monika deletes DEATH BATTLE![]
Wiz: Welcome to Doki Doki Literature Club. A club focused on reading and writing poetry with four other classmates.
Boomstick: There's Sayori, the clumsy, yet cutesy best friend of yours. Natsuki, the bitchy weeaboo.
Wiz: Yuri, the lonely bookworm. And, of course, Monika, the club president.
Boomstick: With the combined forces of you and the other girls, you are tasked with spending time with them, read and write literature, and help set up the school festival coming up soon.
Wiz: During the first few days of being in the literature club, everything seems to go well, you get to know the other clubmates well and become close friends, however, that all changes when you visit Sayori's house, when-
Boomstick: THAT CHICK IS DEAD!
Wiz: Suddenly, the clubmates begin acting strange, Yuri goes from the quiet and mature 'mother' of the club to a self-harming lovesick woman, Natsuki goes from bratty manga-reader to abused bullier, and Sayroi goes from ditzy blonde gril to-
Boomstick: Dead, she's just dead.
Wiz: Of course, only you and one other clubmate is left, and that other one is none other than the club president herself, Monika.
Boomstick: As it turns out, SHE was the one behind making all the girls kill themselves, and as it turns out, she has the ability to warp reality through hacking the game files! WoooOOoh!
Wiz: Let me explain, apparently, becoming club president in the literature club is basically like becoming a god, and being in that title gives the president self-awareness and the ability to modify the game's code to pretty much do whatever they want with the world.... yeah, I don't really get it either, they never really specified.
Boomstick: Weird story aside, Monika certainly couldn't get the player's love by herself, so she used the game files to warp reality!
Wiz: Such as being able to create entirely different places in the universe, judging by what happens when she brings the player to a small classroom.
Boomstick: Floating in SPAAACE! WoooOOOOooooOOOah!
Wiz: Ahem, Monika also seems to have a small sense of pyro and photokinesis, judging by how she was able to both create fire and light in said space classroom.
Boomstick: She also seems to have the ability of manipulating others' vision, turning others into nothing more than a pile of pixels, and even teleportation
Wiz: This teleportation ability is actually quite interesting, considering she was able to teleport into what's essentially a void, a place where literally nothing should exist.
Boomstick: Well, she should be able to turn anything into nothing, anyway, considering, with the help of the script, she can completely delete beings from her own game!
Wiz: This is done through the use of deleting others' 'Character Files,' or .chr files for short.
Boomstick: Using this, she was able to completely delete the other clubmates from her own universe, not before having them suffer a painful 'suicide,' of course!
Wiz: She can also turn herself intangible and semi-invisible, a minor case of telepathy, and can even resurrect anyone from the dead.
Boomstick: Goddamn, this chick is crazy powerful, is there anything she CAN'T do?
Wiz: Actually, yes! Despite her seemingly impressive hacking abilities, compared to professional programmers, she's actually more of a novice at best. And despite powerful reality-warping abilities, at the end of the day, she's still just a normal teenager.
Boomstick: And remember those character files? Yeah, well she has one, too, and it's just as vulnerable as the other girls' files.
Wiz: Although even with her file deleted, she still can communicate through her telepathy, although it's unlikely that she can still modify her game.
Boomstick: Even with that, Monika has proved herself as a force to be reckoned with, 'cause even when she's been deleted from existence, she still has a way to stay with her 'lover,' forwever and ever and ever and ever and ever and e-
Wiz: O-okay, Boomstick, we get it....
Sans has a bone to pick with DEATH BATTLE![]
Wiz: Many years ago, two races lived on earth, Humans and Monsters
Boomstick: Then one day, the humans got all pissy at the monsters for some reason and engaged in war against them.
Wiz: Ultimately, the humans were victorious, and-
Boomstick: Wait hold on, how the HELL did the humans win against a giant goat? Goats are fucking terrifying! Not to mention the other giant monsters such as a LITERAL FLAME BEING, a robot, ghosts, and-
Wiz: I know it may sound strange, but the humans had the one thing the monsters didn't: Determination.
Boomstick: Are you serious? You're just gonna pull that 'DeTeRmInAtIoN' shit on me? What's all this 'dEtErMiNaTiOn' gonna do against a GIANT FISH, breathing ON LAND, with a BUNCH OF MAGICAL SPEARS, in ARMOR, who can SUPLEX A GIANT FUCKING BOULDER, JUST BECAUSE SHE CAN?!?!
Wiz: Ugh, anyway, after the humans won, somehow, they sealed the monsters underground with a magic spell.
Boomstick: And then a couple of years later, 201X, to be exact, some kid climbed Mount Ebott and fell down a hole at the very top of it like a dumbass.
Wiz: However, this was no ordinary hole, this happened to lead to the Underground, where the monster race lived.
Boomstick: Down there, that kid met many faces, such as a motherly goat, a ghost with anxiety, a sociopathic flower, and two talking skeletons!
Wiz: However, after the human listened to the talking flower, they were convinced to completely destroy the monster race once and for all.
Boomstick: And despite not really having anything other than a stick, and being, probably like, 6 or 7 years old, this kid still kicked ass at being a genocidal maniac! They killed the guardian of the ruins, Toriel, captain of the Royal Guards, Undyne, and the underground's top star, Mettaton.
Wiz: Amongst the slaughter, they killed one of the skeletons, who's name was Papyrus. And this would be the human's greatest mistake yet, as after they killed him, they angered Sans the skeleton.
Boomstick: But before that, we need to talk about alternate timelines! Specifically the timeline where the human wasn't a sociopath!
Wiz: In this universe, Sans was the human's closest friend, being the only monster who didn't attempt to fight them due to the woman in the ruin's orders.
Boomstick: Yeah, he's just a simple comedian who drinks ketchup, makes puns, and is generally a good guy. Now, with that out of the way, let's go back to the universe where the kid loves killing!
Wiz: After the human kills Sans' brother, Papyrus, Sans seemingly goes into hiding like the other monsters with Alphys. That is, until, they make it to the Last Corridor.
Boomstick: There, they reunite with Sans on a one-on-one, and let's just say, they should REALLY wish they spared Papyrus, because, y'know, I don't think I'd be happy if my brother were to be brutally murdered either.
Wiz: Here, Sans' true power is shown. First off is his most notable power, bones. Like his brother's abilities, Sans can summon bones from the ground, the ceiling, and really, anywhere.
Boomstick: And if his brother, Papyrus, is comparable, he can increase the size of them, and even make them ride... skateboards?
Wiz: Yeah, Papyrus isn't exactly as mature as his older brother. Anyway, this isn't the only type of bone Sans can use. He also has access to blue bones, they act like regular bones, but are, well, blue. More notably, the blue bones cannot harm foes when they are completely still, only hurting them when they move.
Boomstick: A glimmer of hope for League of Legends players.
Wiz: Sans can also 'infect' his opponents with Karma, or KR for short. It significantly weakens the opponent, making their health slowly drain until it is at a very vulnerable state.
Boomstick: And, with the help of another's SOUL, he can use telekinetic powers to fling them around, all while his eye burns with blue fire! Hey Wiz, can skeletons get eye infections?
Wiz: Uh, I don't think so?
Boomstick: Ah, okay, because I think having a BALL OF BLUE FIRE in your eye would probably hurt.
Wiz: Most likely his most well-known ability, Sans has the ability to summon Gaster Blasters, laser cannons designed by the former royal scientist, W.D Gaster.
Boomstick: Geez, imagine how confident in yourself you have to be to name a giant laser after yourself. When I make a gun, I'm gonna name it after myself too!
Wiz: Oh, so you wanna try out inventing? You could always help me if you want!
Boomstick: Hell no, Wiz, now shut up or you're getting shot with the Boomstick Blaster 9000!
Wiz: Ugh, anyways, the Gaster Blaster is a skull-shaped laser blaster that can be summoned in various different sizes and in large quantities
Boomstick: And this isn't no ordinary laser, no, this bad boy ignores all physical matter and directly hurts an opponent's SOUL, with it being the culmination of one's entire being, this hurts on all levels, including physical!
Wiz: Sans isn't just all offense, though, he also has access to Shortcuts, which is basically just glorified teleportation. He can also seemingly teleport others as well.
Boomstick: He can even use it to cut his attacks off and then CUT RIGHT BACK TO AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT ONE! Jesus, this guy is unstoppable! How much milk has he been drinking?
Wiz: Judging by his defense stat, not alot, Sans is surprisingly quite fragile, being able to be taken down in as less as a single hit!
Boomstick: That's barely a problem, though, because Sans is a great dodger! It's only when he's tired out is when the human can land the final blow!
Wiz: Even still, Sans was a certainly powerful skeleton with his bones and 4th Wall abilities.
Boomstick: And he should, hopefully, drill one thing in your head: Don't fuck with his brother, because if you do, well, let's just say, you're gonna have an.... unpleasent experience...
Intermission[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all!
Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BAATTTTTTLLLLLLEEE!!!
THE FIGHT[]
Aftermath[]
Wiz: The winner is....
Trivia[]
- The connections between Monika and Sans is that both are fan-favorite characters of their respective series who have the knowledge that they are in a game. Both were once also meme characters, and are also from viral indie games.
- If this battle were to be animated, it would ideally be sprite-animated.