Master Tigress vs. Kitty Katswell

Feline Fury
Season	1
Season Episode	8
Air date	May 6th, 2024
Written by	DimeUhDozen
Episode guide
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“	In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.	„
	~ Joseph Wood Krutch

Description

Death Battle returns, bursting through its mid-season point with a matchup between the deadliest cats in the world. The unfathomably skilled Master Tigress from Kung Fu Panda faces off against Petropolis's unsung heroine, Agent Kitty Katswell from T.U.F.F. Puppy.

Interlude

Electronica in the Velvet Room by Shoji Meguro

Duchess: An ancient Chinese proverb states that behind every goofy, clumsy, and lovable hero, there must also be a hyper-competent, kickass catgirl.

Antoinette: I don't think anyone's ever said that before...

Duchess: Well, it's weird that it happened twice. Like with the legendary Master Tigress of the Furious Five.

Antoinette: And Kitty Katswell, T.U.F.F.'s greatest agent. This is Madame Duchess, and I am Antoinette, her all-knowing virtual assistant.

Duchess: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE!

Tigress Claws Her Way Into DEATH BATTLE!

Crowded Downtown Stage - China - by Hideyuki Fukasawa

Duchess: Long ago, in the Valley of Peace, Master Shifu raised a child, loving him like one of his own. He trained him into a martial arts prodigy, teaching him everything to know about kung fu until he was ready to fulfill his destiny as the Dragon Warrior. But upon seeing darkness in his heart, Shifu's own master, Oogway, saw the darkness in his soul, and denied him the title he had trained his entire childhood for the sole purpose of achieving. ...Oogway was kind of an asshole.

Antoinette: With he felt his purpose was taken from him, that child became a monster. An unstoppable force of pure rage and bitterness. That child's name was Tai Lung. He was imprisoned shortly after, but the pain in Shifu's heart lingered. For a long time, he would see no attachments and no love. Or at least, never remotely in the way he loved Tai Lung. The kind of love... Master Tigress would have needed.

Duchess: She seemed to come around just fine though.

• Master Tigress:
• In her 20s
• Style of Choice: Tiger Style
• Occupation: Kung Fu Master
• Likes: Training, Fighting
• Dislikes: Disrespect

Antoinette: Just like Tai Lung, Tigress was an orphan, and her worst tendencies were apparent right from the start. She was violent, rage-filled, and lacked control. Though this wasn't entirely her fault. Her powerful appearance and claws often scared away other children, leaving Tigress in an isolated environment. Very unhealthy for a growing child. With everyone else treating her like a monster, Tigress began to see herself as one as well.

Duchess: Luckily, Master Shifu was called in to assist, and taught her discipline in the form of dominoes, as well as the importance of the yin and yang. Despite seeing improvement, there was no one willing to adopt her. No one except Shifu, who out of the kindness of his heart, invited her to stay at the Jade Palace, much to her elation. However -- she was about to see a new side to Shifu. The side Tai Lung left scarred and hollow.

Antoinette: Though he had his moments of kindness here and there, as he trained her in kung fu, he tried his best not to make the same mistakes he did before. Praise was few and far between, leading Tigress to believe that even now, she was not good enough. She gained a desire to impress him, but was only met with coldness. Tigress would only know discipline, and while this made her a better kung fu warrior, her social skills and emotional openness left... much to be desired. While Tigress never fell to the dark like Tai Lung, she wasn't exactly doing well either.

Duchess: She did everything to better herself, dedicating her entire life to kung fu. She followed Shifu's instructions to a fault, punched trees until her fists no longer felt pain, and tried her very best to copy Shifu's style, something that didn't go over very well. However, it was only through her deviance to his instructions that she mastered the Tiger Style, a martial art of her own making, relying on speed, precision, and power. It focuses mainly on aggression, getting in close quarters and honing offense instead of defense to force opponents into deadly combos. Kind of like that guy on Street Fighter that won't stop hitting you against the edge of the screen.

Antoinette: It was this style that allowed her to triumph over the villain Boar with the help of four other legendary warriors, who would eventually become a group of the greatest kung fu masters the Valley of Peace would ever know. The Furious Five.

Duchess: They were an unstoppable team, their feats becoming that of legend. And finally in Tigress's life, everything started to make sense. Even when Oogway received a terrifying vision that Tai Lung would return, Tigress remained confident for the ceremony that was to come, where one in attendance was to be handed the title of the unfathomably powerful Dragon Warrior. Everything was going exactly as she thought, and Oogway's judgement led him to Tigress's path. Her hopes were raised.

...

And then life decided to throw her a curveball.

Antoinette: A curveball named Po. An inexperienced fanboy panda who was unexpectedly announced the Dragon Warrior on what Shifu considered an accident. But as we all know, there are no acci-

Duchess: Don't you dare finish that sentence! Don't do it! I'm sick of it!

Antoinette: Um... Uh...

(Music cuts as the camera steadily zooms in on her face)

Corridors of Time by Yasunori Mitsuda

Antoinette: Well, chaos theory states that infinitesimal perturbations of initial condition for a chaotic dynamic system lead to large variations, and the concept of "chance" is introduced at each chapter of the progress of our knowledge. Humans still do not possess the awareness that they are at the edge of a much deeper reality which eludes them even now. So, really, all things do have meaning in their relationship to the greater whole, but the collective unconsciousness is not yet ready to understand this. Even the smallest flap of a butterfly's wings have a significant purpose in relation to the existence of the entirety of the whole. So, hypothetically, you could factually prove that there is no such thing as an accident.

(Cut to Duchess's face, which has shrunken, almost like a popped balloon.)

Duchess: Ah... Actually, you can keep saying it. I don't mind.

(The music cuts back in as Antoinette looks awfully pleased with herself.)

Duchess: But I'm pretty sure even if you told Tigress this, she probably wouldn't listen, as she was decidedly against the idea of him as the Dragon Warrior, as was the rest of the Five. After all, how could an amateur like him possibly carry the strength to defeat Shifu's most talented pupil? This led to Tigress acting hostile and cold to Po, even telling him to his face to leave if he had any respect in his body. Because strength, talent, and discipline -- was all she was ever taught. Something Po had none of. Even as the Five warmed up to him, she still did not believe he had what it took to defeat Tai Lung and set off with them to take him on themselves.

Antoinette: Tigress and the Five confronted Tai Lung on a bridge. Though they certainly put up a fight, they found themselves outclassed and beaten by his superior style and nerve attack technique. Tigress had to confront a truth she had been training her whole life to avoid. That she... was not enough. Despite her discipline, despite her strength, she could not defeat Tai Lung, and she was not the Dragon Warrior. But to everyone's surprise... Po was.

Duchess: Using his unorthodox method of fighting and using the unique attributes that were teased and deemed useless, Po actually managed to banish Tai Lung to the Spirit Realm and brought peace to the Valley. And seeing this, Tigress came to a conclusion. It didn't matter. It didn't matter if she was good enough or strong enough. As Po proved, what mattered was her own individuality and supporting others as they discovered theirs. A lesson she should have learned far back when she deviated from Shifu's teaching all those years ago and used to help Po from the start. When Po emerged from the dust, a hero, Tigress was the first to bow and call Po a true kung fu master.

Antoinette: In a way, she was almost like a reflection of Tai Lung, accepting and taking solace in the one thing he feared. Instead of taking his path and resenting Po for denying her a greater destiny, she respected Po and would go on to become one of his closest allies and confidants. Even when confronting the terrible truth of Lord Shen's genocide and his struggles to become a teacher himself, Tigress became his support to lean on. In place of anger and resentment, there now existed compassion and understanding.

Duchess: And in the end, Tigress and the Five carried on that compassion to train the new Dragon Warrior. Coming full circle once again. Okay, enough mushy talk, darlings. Let's get to the feats!

• Skills:
• Superhuman Durability and Strength
• Tiger Style Martial Arts
• Superhuman Reflexes and Speed
• Can control the Spirit Orbs of Master Ding
• Possibly knows the Chao Wa Punch Kick

Antoinette: Tigress's Tiger Style makes her an extremely difficult opponent to approach. She also makes stunning use of acrobatics and speed, honed in no small part to her rigorous training.

Duchess: She's agile enough to make great leaps across buildings, scale towers AS they're falling, and quick enough to catch an arrow without even looking.

Antoinette: Even when she was a child, she was able to demolish extremely large boulders. Given the size, we can say that the energy Tigress had to be emitting was 0.39 tons of TNT. Tigress can also very much keep up with Po, who can keep up with Kai whose speed has been calculated to be around supersonic levels. While she initially failed to beat him the first time, due to her now being on par with Po, she should also scale to Tai Lung, who made a crater in the ground equating to 1.35 tons of TNT.

Duchess: She also possesses the mental focus required to control the Spirit Orbs of Master Ding, allowing her the ability to enter the minds of others. Even when she's asleep, she possesses sharp reflexes that protect her at any given moment, and she supposedly knows the Chao Wa Punch Kick, which allows one to instantly immobilize an adversary.

Antoinette: Strong, fierce, and worthy in her own way, Tigress brings the fury to the Furious Five.

( Clip from Kung Fu Panda 2 )

Tigress: The mast is not a worthy opponent.

( She flips down from the boat and engages in a battle stance. )

Tigress: I am ready.

( SFX: Gates Closing )

Kitty is NOWHERE AND EVERYWHERE in DEATH BATTLE!

The Name's Bond... James Bond by David Arnold

Duchess: Envision the most competent heroine you can. Your Lara Croft, your Charlie's Angels. A dashing leading lady so superhumanly good and fit for the job that you can't expect them to do anything but succeed. Working to protect a city day and night, being so skilled, they're actually overqualified for whatever task is ahead of them. I want you to envision that larger than life femme fatale, and I want you to see them... in a world envisioned by Butch Hartman where everyone is an animal...

Lovely Gate 3 ... for Egg Quarters by Fumie Kumatani

• Kitty Katswell:
• Age: In her 20s
• Height: 5'6"
• Occupation: Agent of T.U.F.F.
• Likes: Fighting, long speeches, hygiene, smoke bombs, Dudley (sometimes)
• Dislikes: Incompetence, humiliation congas, D.O.O.M., Dudley (sometimes)

Antoinette: Kitty Katswell grew up in an environment that treated her like a joke. Her family life in particular was terrible. Kitty's mother would constantly antagonize her, even going as so far as to prefer her sister, who was IN PRISON at the time, over her. She wasn't even safe on her birthday, which resulted in chaos just about every year. Accident-prone and unloved, she decided to put her skills to a place where she could be of real use, where perhaps, she could belong.

Duchess: After eight long years in... "Secret Agent College"... I can't believe that's a thing... She immediately put herself to the test. Kitty learned the arts of stealth and espionage, trained herself to speak over 120 dialects, and mastered every martial art style there ever was. If there ever was a cat to be qualified for the job, it would be Kitty Katswell.

Antoinette: At some point, she found that home she'd been searching for. The Turbo Undercover Fighting Force. T.U.F.F. for short. She quickly became one of if not their best agent, engaging in high speed chases, avoiding certain death around every corner, and stopping the likes of Bird Brain and The Cham-El-Eon in their tracks.

Duchess: Antoinette, I think that's-...

Antoinette: That's what, ma'am?

Duchess: Ah, never mind. Must be a TTS thing... Anyways, for once, everything was coming up Kitty. With The Chief, Keswick, and her suave partner Jack Rabbit at her back, she was an agent's agent, living the life she always dreamed of having. That is until the day Jack Rabbit left for unknown reasons. From then on, Kitty flew solo, still living and moving on. That is until... that wacky trickster God sent her a curveball too.

Antoinette: A curveball named Dudley Puppy, a mutt mixed with the DNA of every single dog breed. And some goat for some reason. While chasing his chew toy one day, he interrupted a chase with the villain Snaptrap, allowing him to get away, much to her annoyance. But even more surprising, his dog instincts allowed him to be able to take out Snaptrap's henchmen on his own efficiently. And when T.U.F.F. took him in for analysis, they saw he had great potential to be a spy, enlisting him as Kitty's new partner.

Duchess: There's just one problem. Dudley... is kind of an idiot.

Antoinette: While he... does... have some moments of intelligence occasionally, Dudley is loud, emotional, impulsive, and struggles to take into account the situations around him., which makes him an incredibly frustrating partner to work with for Kitty. He's gotten them both captured and put through the wringer several times.

Duchess: While initially frustrated with Dudley, and yes, she does rightfully call him out a lot... perhaps on deaf ears... she actually deeply cares for the mutt and sees appreciation for him. Like Tigress before her, she quickly came to realize that what Dudley needed was support, and in return, she got results.

Antoinette: Dudley and Kitty have worked together using their combined talents to defeat opponents with the lack of their senses of sight, have performed perfectly in sync with one another, and generally do help each other out of a jam when the need calls for it, like when Kitty offered to help Dudley when he struggled to live home alone without his mother.

Duchess: All things considered, Kitty has the patience of a saint. And that's not even her most versatile skill.

• Skills:
• Superhuman Reflexes
• Acrobatics
• Blaster Mastery
• Lethal Weapon Claws
• Motorcycle Skill
• Boring Speeches
• Toon Force

Antoinette: Kitty has extremely superhuman reflexes and speed. She's quick enough to perform handspring flips, use acrobatics to get out of the way of sonic booms, jump to the top of mountains, and should scale to Dudley who could easily deflect lightspeed lasers with only a frying pan. Even in an altered timeline where she received no training whatsoever, her instincts as an agent still allowed her to remain just as skilled as before.

Duchess: Once, while stuck in a mall that was being hurdled towards the sun in about two minutes, she was able to calculate the exact speed, velocity, and angle needed to slingshot it around the star.

Antoinette: Scaling to Keswick who reacted and moved as the sun was slingshotted back to Earth, she would have needed to be thinking and acting at 69.114 times the speed of light.

Duchess: Hehe nice. Let's go.

Antoinette; I agree! It is a nice feat!

Duchess: N-No, it's... forget about it, actually.

Antoinette: Sometimes this quick-thinking can actually save the day too, like when she figured out a battle suit's weakness just by hearing what kind of weapons it had. And her plan actually worked on the first try too. Not only is she skilled, but she's incredibly intelligent as well!

Duchess: Good thing too. Because every T.U.F.F. agent is equipped with a blaster capable of disintegrating with pin-point precision. She's shot muffins that were just dropped out of the sky without missing and is capable of hitting devices into people's hands before they even raise them.

Antoinette: But she's no sitting duck in terms of close quarters either. As stated before, she knows all forms of martial arts and can use her own claws as registered lethal weapons. But even when the world decides it's time for her to suffer once again... she has a way of making it all work out of her in the end. The bane of my existence... Toon Force.

Duchess: My FAVORITE topic of discussion! Kitty, like other combatants we've talked about before, is extremely hard to put down. Sure, she might suffer and the universe might think of her as a punching bag, but she can always take it and get back up, like when she got flattened by a tramping mob and appeared fine seconds later, and regenerated from being stabbed by massive spikes in multiple parts of her body without even dying. She's even able to use this nonsensical logic to her own advantage, using Hammerspace to pull out massive missile launchers and put people to sleep just by talking.

Antoinette: And if you thought this cat only walked around on foot, you'd be wrong. While she is as agile as a cat and can crawl on narrow surfaces like one, she can also take the finer cruises in life and hop on a motorcycle or the tricked out Tuff Mobile, which she can summon just by pressing a button on her belt.

Duchess: This baby can fly, shoot missiles, and turn into the Tuff Shuttle, which can catch up to that mall that was heading towards the sun that we talked about earlier.

Antoinette: But of course, we can't discuss Kitty without talking about her other gadgets.

• Weapons:
• Blaster
• Missile Launchers
• Homing System
• Jetpack
• Yarn Gun
• Ice Skates
• Mini-Ray Gun Keychain
• Smoke Bombs
• Brain Swapping Gun

Duchess: Kitty's packing with her blaster and her missile launchers, but just in case she misses, she also has a lock-on homing system too. If that wasn't enough, she also has a jetpack, a gun that fires yarn that forms into a net, ice skates that can make you automatically perfect, smoke bombs, a keychain that can freeze large bodies of ice and melt them down, and a ray that swaps your brain out with your opponent's. She's got it ALL.

Antoinette: Katswell is also incredibly resilient. She's literally died eight times and stayed standing and ready to fight later, and she can get rammed through an entire garden of cactuses, blown up by land mines, and be run over by a train, and still be perfectly fine seconds later. She was able to even tank missiles that destroyed T.U.F.F. Headquarters, SEVERAL TIMES in the same day, equating to 1.75 tons of TNT. And she remained... fine. That's also not to mention... she endures this kind of abuse every DAY.

Duchess: She also possesses immense mental fortitude, like the times she resisted a mind-controlling video and made her mind blank enough to avoid telepathy. Though she is not without her weaknesses. For one, if her whiskers are cut, she loses her balance.

Antoinette: This is actually true for real life cats, as they carry proprioceptors in them. They allow felines to be hyper-aware of what's going on in their body all the time which allows them to keep their balance. You know that myth about cats always landing on their feet? It's not just an urban legend. It's a skill!

Duchess: Another one of these weaknesses, as revealed in her diary, is actually her bad relationship with her mother. She's been constantly pushed on with expectations that she'll never reach to the point where her mother would take an active criminal over her disappointment of a daughter. When put face to face with this reality by the shapeshifting Chameleon, Kitty broke down.

Antoinette: But while Dudley might have put Kitty through hell and back, he alone was there to assure her of her self-worth. Even with her faults, she still is T.U.F.F.'s greatest agent, and a good friend as well. It was through her partner's encouragement that she was able to overcome her fear and retaliate by using her opponents' own fears against them.

Duchess: It wasn't the first time either. Even without her balance, she was still able to go blow for blow with Dudley and they can grow back fairly quickly. You can try. You can get the whole universe to think Kitty Katswell is a loser, a punching bag, a Meg, a Squidward, a gag. But she will always get back up. Because despite the world being against her, she takes on the world.

( Clip from Super Duper Crime Busters )

Kitty: NOWHERE AND EVERYWHERE!

She throws a smoke bomb.

(SFX: Gates Closing)

Pre-battle

Missness: All possibilities have been accounted for, and I'm about to make a lot of money...

Antoinette: DEATH BATTLE SIMULATION COMMENCING.

DEATH BATTLE!

Crisis by Shoji Meguro

Snap directly to the evening streets of Petropolis, a yellow flash bursts from the darkness of an alleyway, and with it is Master Tigress. At first, she is completely confused and dazed from the trip. She groans and holds her head with her other arm, while the other carries some mystical idol that looks as if it might be of some historical value. Then, she raises her hand and takes a good look around her, she tenses up slightly, unfamiliar with the architecture, or really anything within this place. She looks down to the idol she's carrying like a detective about to collect their last clue.

Tigress: So this must be your fault then...

Tigress clicks her tongue, recollecting how she was in a, frankly easy fight from some bandits, attempting to retrieve this moments earlier, shown to us in the form of brief flash-frame flashbacks. Then, the next thing she remembers, she's stuck here with this idol in hand. Luckily, it seems her mind and body are intact, simply displaced in perhaps a different dimension. Though she remains calm as ever, heading in the way of the light, until she hears the click of a firearm from behind her, along with a warning voice.

Kitty: Freeze! In the name of the Turbo Undercover Fighting Force!

In a comic-book-y slide-over towards the other end of the street, a tall feline in stylish clothing aims her technologically advanced blaster. Tigress raises a brow, not sure what any of those words could possibly mean, but merely trudges away in search of more answers. However, this dismissal only leads to a warning shot from Kitty that grazes past her cheek before she can even react, causing her eyes to widen and stifled breath. The sight of that blast of energy zooming towards a wall, leaving a harsh burn on it. She remembers... What exactly that type of weapon is. Briefly, the sight of Shen and his cannons are reflected in Tigress's eyes, and she immediately, angrily turns back towards Kitty who only looks mildly inconvenienced.

Kitty: Ugh! I said, FREEZE!

Tigress's eyes narrow.

Tigress: You shouldn't have that.

Kitty's blaster gestures a bit towards the idol in her hand.

Kitty: You're the one holding a stolen artifact. Pot calling the kettle black, much?

Tigress: I didn't steal it.

Kitty: Can you prove that?

Lone Digger (Phietto Remix) by Caravan Palace, Phietto

Tigress's eyes shift slightly around and she finds herself at a loss. That question oddly stings, both because she really doesn't have an answer to it, any that would make sense anyways, and she finds herself at square one. Treated like a mere predator, a thief. A huff through her nostrils. There's only one way out of this, the only way she knows. She sets down the idol and angles herself into a martial arts stance, leg extended and her arm raised behind her neck.

Tigress: I'm sorry, but you really don't want this fight. If you're wise, and you trust me, you'll stay down.

Kitty: On the contrary. I'll do anything if it makes taking criminals like you to justice!

THIS IS TUNA WITH BACON!

IIIIIIIT"S SHOWTIME!

Tigress immediately gets on all-fours, surprising Kitty, and lunging ahead into close quarters, closing the distance in a single leap. The agent is forced to holster her blaster at her leg and extend her claws out to slash at the incoming invader. They both seem to have similar ideas as their claws clash against each other, the impact of said clash knocking Tigress back a small bit, but still landing on her feet. Though not a beat is missed as she proceeds to go into a set of three jabs and a strong right hook. Kitty plays defensively and holds up her arms to block, using the small window of opportunity to crouch down and do a precise sweeping leg kick across Tigress's legs. This succeeds in knocking her down, though she flips back up with little to know breaks in her rhythm. She raises her leg to perform one kick after another, alternating between the two rather impressively and quickly. Agent Katswell swiftly moves her head out of the way of each strike until one unexpectedly kicks her square in the face, leaving a small bruise.

She stumbles back.

Then retaliates with a dropkick once she sees Tigress get comfortable, hitting her in the exact same spot, even getting a slight reaction out of the stoic-faced warrior. Tigress's eyes narrow as she gives a slight growl, while Kitty remains as smug as collected as ever. They're both even now and the fight is only about to get more hectic. Both of them unleash their claws again and they rush ahead with a series of quick slashes, zooming across air and whisking forth, moving faster and faster until only streaks of white can be seen between the two. But ultimately in this contest of speed, the agent of T.U.F.F. prevails, managing to scratch Tigress's chest, leaving her top tattered. In a state of fury, the Kung Fu master engages in a flurry of acrobatic kicks, moving closer to end the gap once more, even spinning to confuse Kitty.

Kitty; What's wrong? Can't keep up? I understand if you wanna-GAH-

With force enough to blow apart a wall, Tigress makes a precise strike towards her chest as Kitty's gloating is interrupted, a squeal in place of her voice ass she's knocked straight through the structure of a building. She makes a loud and comical impact on the wall resemblant of a cartoon. Tigress brushes off the dust from her arm and cracks her neck as she enters the night club to make sure she stays down and out.

Tigress: Apparently I can.

The scene cuts to where Kitty has landed. A dimly lit neon nightclub on the dead ends of Petropolis. The types where the sleazy types reside. As she regains her footing, she finds that she's crashed into a table, splitting it in two. Scratching her head, she rises to her feet, only to yelp slightly at the knocked out or perhaps dead body laying at her feet. Making a grossed-out face, she carefully steps over the bloody scene only to see resembling ones across the club. She assess there must've been a massive fight here. And yet, she looks towards the gazelle in the circle. Still just... dancing despite it all. Did she not notice the-?

Her attention swerves to Tigress who enters through the hole she made, pressing her fists together as if to say that there was far more where that came from for Kitty if she decided to engage further. Stepping forward with perhaps a sense of overconfidence, she begins to speak as Kitty takes cover underneath the table, just barely managing to evade her line of sight.

Tigress: Let me go with the idol and I'll be out of your hair. If you know what's good for you, you won't follow.

Kitty however looks at a broken piece of a mirror damaged in the scuffle on the floor, perfectly making the calculations in her head as she spies Tigress's face through it, she readies her blaster and makes a quick snipe towards it. It reflects off of its surface and ricochets towards her opponent. Tigress gets an instinct that she should dodge out of the way of it, but it comes far too late for her to do anything. The pink laser is too quick for her to react to and it strikes her in the stomach, leaving a very large burn. Tigress roars as she reels out in pain. Kitty raises her head from the table and smirks.

Kitty: Oh, you don't like that, huh?

An angry snort is all that is heard from Tigress's end, giving a swift and annoyed answer to Kitty's question. Now that she sees her, she lunges forth towards her once more, using the tactics of her Tiger Style in order to get up close and personal, however, it fails her as when she approaches, the master marksman fires a second blast and it nearly grazes her arm. A third, and it really does hit her. Before she knows it, the agent is flying above her head with some kind of contraption on her back. A jetpack. She speeds around the room, firing dozens of shots and Tigress attempts to swerve out of the way, using aim-dodging to at least dodge a few, grabbing tables and broken debris to block the impact of the heat, though she quickly feels herself growing desperate and angrier. For every one laser she blocks or dodges, three more hit her as the speeding agent circles around her like a buzzing insect.

Tigress: You coward!

She roars at the other through the pain, only to find that her opponent in the hole she came from, equipped with a large device. And for a moment, Tigress seems to recognize it. More than her simple blaster, she recognizes it as a much grander, much deadlier, variation of Lord Shen's fireworks. She recoils a bit, then lets her venom show through her teeth, showing a superior moral high ground to the other.

Tigress: That is a disgrace to kung fu. If you have any respect at all for the art, you'll-

She's interrupted abruptly by the sight of the missile zooming towards her and without a second wasted, the explosive detonates on contact, causing a massive explosion that sends her recoiling back, flying across the entire room with scorch-marks on her body. The warrior from the Valley of Peace eats dirt as her chin skids along the ground, bloodied and bruised. A black eye resides on her face now. She struggles to get back up from such a blow and her muscles for once seem to ache again. What she doesn't realize is that those missiles, those guns she's been using... They're standard grade now. Normalized. Even if she did try anything to stop the larger problem, like back then, it was far too late. But her plights weren't heard over the style and smugness of the feline above her now, pointing a blaster to her head.

Kitty: Sorry, I couldn't hear you over the sound of me winning. You're coming back to T.U.F.F. HQ to answer some questions.

Tigress: You're very confident... I wonder if that's just as true on the inside as it is on the outside...

Kitty: Weird...

Her eyes shift around a bit.

Kitty: ...thing to say.

All Tigress needs to do is make a pulling gesture with her paw. Kitty doesn't understand what's going on, but even if she did, it would've been far too late. The warrior has summoned forth the Spirit Orbs, and they are pulled directly into her hand, much to Katswell's astonishment. She aims to pull the trigger, but a bright flash of light hinders her. The orbs collect themselves into a great sphere of mystical energy, completely whiting out the environment around them. The agent shields her eyes. Then flutters them she finds herself... deep within the sanctum of her mind. She looks around at a floating collection of photographs, yarn, and toothbrushes. Her confusion is interrupted by Tigress grabbing her by the neck from behind.

Kitty: GHH!

Tigress: So, this is what your mind looks like. You never answered me properly.

Kitty: What... What're you talking about-!?

Images of her birthdays go flying by, her mother scolding her, her feelings of longing and being constantly pummeled by the feeling that she will never be enough. Kitty clenches her eyes and jerks her head away from the photos flying before her. Though Tigress shakes her and makes her face press against them until she can ignore the feelings no longer. There is a dark and humorless tone to her voice.

Tigress: How can you disrespect something so sacred... when you don't even respect yourself?

Kitty feels the emotions rushing towards her, all of the yelling, all of the weight. She feels cold, empty and hopeless. Tigress almost feels pity of her, seeing someone who perhaps on other terms, she could have been kindred spirits with. But her evils must be halted now. Her claws extend to her inner self's neck and Kitty sees in her mind's eye an image that both aggravates her and brings her comfort. That silly dog that really thought the world of her. Her partner. Sure, he could be annoying at times, but... he believed in her. And if that were so easy for an idiot like Dudley, why couldn't she. Groaning, she finally screams out with resolve, causing Tigress's eyes to grow wide in surprise. In a flash, she's booted out of her mind, and finds herself lying on the same floor she did when they began. Panting still, she finds that the both of them are disoriented. Tigress, from the physical assault, and Kitty from the mental one. Though if she can just push her body to its limits, she can finish this here and now. Yes... using THAT technique.

While the agent holds her head in confusion, she moves her body in a set of rigorous and precise motions before aiming to strike the cat in the gut. Though dazed, Kitty, finds it in her to defend herself in one last act. Pressing her finger against the button at her belt, causing a loud VROOM to emit from the other side of the alley. Tigress is about to land the final blow of the Chao Wa Punch Kick when she hears something revving from behind her. Her jaw drops, unable to even make out a word. Kitty somersaults out of the way while Tigress meets full-on collusion with the Tuff Mobile, charging at her at full turbo speed. It rams her through several walls as she gives a cat-like scream, an assault that finally ends when she ends up splatted against the wall of a parking lot, body bursting into bloody chunks. Kitty finally rises to her feet and huffs, speaking with a sense of spiritual victory.

Kitty: I... I do. I do respect myself...

She's snapped out of her small personal moment by her communicator, showing an image of T.U.F.F.'s science expert.

Kitty: Hey, Keswick... I might have... made a little mess with our treasure thief.

Keswick: Not tuh-tuh-tuh-to worry, Agent Katswell. As it turns out, the Mystic Monkey was in the museum all a-a-a-a-along!

Kitty: What!?

She looks over the idol that was left on the edge of the street during their fight. She throws a pebble at it to see if it was some fake or a hologram, and it immediately disappears without a trace before her very eyes. Kitty's trying to figure this out as best she can...

Kitty: But... how is that possible? I-It was right here!

Keswick: I first thuh-thuh-theorized that the Mystic Monkey was a dimension-traveling device of some suh-suh-sort. But it's more like a temporal displacement idol!

Kitty: A... time machine...

Keswick: We-We-Well, I'm sure it's in safe hands now. Good work, Agent Katswell.

Kitty looks solemnly at the tiger's bloody unrecognizable body staining the wall, and can't help but think that... something was very wrong here. Slowly, she nods at Keswick before turning off her comm and returning to HQ. The scene gradually fades into a beautiful bustling city at the center of China. A group of tourists crowd around a golden statue of a panda along with five other warriors. The camera slowly pans over towards one that resembles Tigress... just settling on her face... and the past she left behind.

K.O.

• Kitty is seen "enjoying" her hollow victory as she eats a bagel while wacky shenanigans go on in the T.U.F.F. office.
• Po is seen looking over a view of the Valley of Peace from the Jade Palace, though we only see him from behind. Slowly... he lowers his head... as if sensing something is wrong. He perks up his head when a breeze of peach tree petals passes him by...

Results

Duchess: OH MY GOD, I WAS WRONG!

Antoinette: IT WAS EARTH ALL ALONG!

Both: YES, YOU'VE FINAALLLY MADE A MASTER MONKEY OUT OF MEEEE!

Duchess: Now onto the results, Dr. Zaiu-... I mean, Antoinette!

• Tigress:
• = Similar levels of strength
• = Similar levels of skill
• + More disciplined
• + The Chao Wa Punch Kick could incapacitate Kitty
• - Helpless against Kitty's arsenal
• - Far slower
• - Would struggle to be able to permanently put her down

• Kitty:
• = Similar levels of strength
• = Similar levels of skill
• - A lot more overconfident
• - Could be left paralyzed
• + Fast enough to dodge her attacks easily
• + Her weapons could potentially one-shot
• + Her mind is strong enough to defend against mental attacks

Antoinette: Both of these characters are extremely gifted martial artists. But while Tigress is a master of the Tiger Style and has faced many kung fu masters, Kitty has actually learned and mastered just about every martial art there is.

Duchess: They also possessed similar levels of strength. Kitty scales to 1.75 tons of TNT while Tigress scales to 1.35 tons of TNT. While Kitty is slightly stronger, it wouldn't really make all that much of a difference in the fight. Where it would matter is speed.

Antoinette: While Tigress scales to Kai's supersonic feat of casually moving his blades and Po who can redirect cannonballs, Kitty scales to lightspeed lasers and can react at speeds that are faster than light, meaning that she would be able to react to any of Tigress's attacks with ease.

Duchess: And while Tigress should know the Chao Wa Punch Kick, she has never demonstrated using it in combat, and Kitty's combat speed would render it easy to dodge.

Antoinette: Now, onto the most damning factor. Her arsenal. Kitty has a lot of ranged weapons that would be able to put Master Tigress down from her laser blaster to her keychain, which could freeze her into a block of ice, the latter of which could end the fight instantly.

Duchess: And let's not forget what happened with Lord Shen and the other Kung Fu masters. When he invented a weapon so powerful and so fast that they weren't able to react, he made quick work of them easily. Now imagine that but on levels far faster than Tigress could even hope to comprehend and with a homing mode to boot. Closing the distance would only help her so much, especially when Kitty has her jetpack and the Tuff Mobile to keep away. Kitty is quite literally Tigress's bane. A projectile user.

Antoinette: Her mental strength was just the icing on the cake too. Tigress was a legendary combatant and her skill will no doubt go down in legend for eons to come, but Kitty had her pinned so Katswell, that her chances of victory went... skadoosh.

Duchess: The winner is Kitty Katswell.

Next Time

. . .

A CRAZED set of four eyes burst from a shadowy background. Hues of a pink scythe glimmer at one side, while on the other, a pair of scissors, dripping in pink blood, fade into view.

???: BEHIND EVERY DARK AND GLOOMY SOUL LIVES ANOTHER THAT SHINES AS BRIGHT AS THE SUN!

???: YOU GONNA LEAVE ME SOMEWHERE!? YOU GONNA LEAVE ME ALONE!?!?

. . .

Spinel vs. Toko Fukawa.

Trivia

• This is DimeUhDozen’s eighth Death Battle episode.
• This battle would have been sprite animated like the last episode.
• Both combatants are felines.
• Kitty and Tigress both deal with being partnered up or accepting a new recruit who is an unlikely hero and at first does not seem to have what it takes, only to attain a newfound respect for them and being shown humility.
• Both combatants had fairly awful beginnings with Tigress growing up alone in an orphanage, then seeking approval from Shifu, and Kitty growing up as a walking disaster, seeking approval from her terrible mother.
• Aside from originating in a Dreamworks film, both Tigress and Kitty have starred in a Nickelodeon cartoon, Kung Fu Panda; Legends of Awesomeness and T.U.F.F. Puppy respectively.
• This is the first appearance of a Dreamworks character in the series and the second Nickelodeon character to join the roster, the first being Azula in Shego vs. Azula.
• Antoinette's explanation on chaos theory references Ricky Potts's monologue from Ride the Cyclone and Duchess's annoyance at the "There are no accidents" line directly references Peter B. Parker's line in Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse.
• The nightclub that Kitty and Tigress fight in is a reference to the music video for Caravan Palace's Lone Digger in which a feud between anthropomorphic cats and dogs ends brutally for both sides. The oblivious dancing gazelle from the video also makes an appearance.