Lazlo vs Sans

Lazlo vs Sans is the ninth What-If? Death Battle by GoCommitDi. It features Lazlo from Camp Lazlo, and Sans from Undertale.

Description

Camp Lazlo vs Undertale! These two playful slackers are constant nuisances to tall egomaniacs, but only one will have what it takes to crack a victory. Will Lazlo roast Sans into a marshmallow, or will Sans ensure Lazlo's victory will be "boned"?

If this is what it takes to introduce Lazlo to the world of debating, so be it

Intro

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7w-_F_VgMY)

Boomstick: No. Please no. We've already dealt with Squidward's House vs Monster House, Gon Freecss vs Johnny Test and Killua Zoldyck vs Dukey! Make it stop!

Wiz: I'll tell you this again, Boomstick - bosses orders. Can't complain if we're on a contract.

Boomstick: Well, this better be the last type of fight we're doing.

Wiz: I doubt it. But allow me to explain. Goofy slackers who make lame jokes are the type of people you would expect to never defend themselves in a fight since they're better off as class clowns, right? Wrong. Just ask Lazlo, the troublemaking monkey of Camp Kidney who always keeps a positive attitude...

Boomstick: ...and Sans, the first thing that the average Internet user will think of when they see a skeleton. Because, you know, forced memes. He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win...a Death Battle.

Pre-Fight Poll

Place roots and bets here. I swear this will be my last match-up like this...for now.

Attention, DEATH BATTLE! It's Time for Camp Lazlo!

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u0y-k-lob5I)

Boomstick: What do you get when you send SpongeBob SquarePants to the surface and have him attend a summer camp instead of boating school? You end up with Lazlo, of course. You may think his backstory is non-existent, but it's deeper than that, actually.

Wiz: It's not anything too deep. Prickly Pines is a small, quiet town somewhere in the United States. It's home to a tight-knit community, but it's also home to the shittiest summer camp - Camp Kidney, run by Scoutmaster Lumpus.

Boomstick: Camp Kidney houses all of the stereotypical summer camp shenanigans. Ya know, like mosquitoes sucking all your blood at 11pm, people fighting for the last marshmallow, and a scoutmaster that only took the job to make kids miserable.

Wiz: One day, the cautious and organized elephant, Raj, immigrated from India and was sent here so his parents could toughen him up. At the same time, there was also a quiet rhinoceros named Clam.

Boomstick: Wait, who the hell would name their rhino Clam? Were they expecting seafood during labor?

Wiz: Upon arrival, both were bullied by the local camp jerk, Edward Platypus, until Lazlo arrived in a banana truck! What followed was Edward's bitterness towards Lazlo for hogging all the attention, and Lumpus growing dissatisfied with Lazlo, Raj and Clam's shenanigans. And it was at that point when Lazlo heard a bear crying for help.

Boomstick: Lazlo went to go investigate, and at first, the bear roared at him...until it was revealed that the bear only had two pine cones stuck in their nose. So it's safe to assume Lazlo must be related to Chuck Norris for having balls of titanium.

Wiz: Lazlo brought the bear to camp, only to strike fear in everybody, so after Lazlo tried to politely ask the bear to leave, well, it definitely wasn't nice. The bear was angry at him, and everybody assumed Lazlo was eaten due to Edward exaggerating the details to make himself look cool! At least until Raj and Clam traveled to find his last known whereabouts.

Boomstick: They found him working as a waiter at a steakhouse. I sure hope he loved the crappy world of minimum wage, because after explaining the incident to Raj and Clam, Lazlo decided he didn't want to leave - until Raj accidentally convinced him to return.

Raj: You know, Lazlo, when we first met you, Clam and I didn't know anything about camping. But you showed us what camping is - that it's having fun, and adventure, and nature. But we did not escape from camp dressed as totem poles, risked getting eaten by nature, ride a roller coaster with a weasel, and drink water WITHOUT ice because we wanted to be good campers! ...we did it to find you, because friends stick together.

Wiz: Guess what happened the next day? The same grizzly bear from before entered camp grounds, with pine cones stuck in his nose again! When Edward thought he was going to get mauled, Lazlo entered in and helped out the bear again. It was at that point when he truly reunited with Raj and Clam, and they've been an inseparable trio since then.

Boomstick: Also since then, Lazlo has accomplished some pretty amazing feats. All within the span of a summer, no less. Well...sort of.

---

Feats

• Caught a fish, which is something nobody in Camp Kidney had ever accomplished before
• Tricked the Squirrel Scouts into thinking he, Raj and Clam were aliens
• Witnessed a meteor shower that only occurs once every 50,000 years
• Taught Raj how to swim
• Helped Camp Kidney pass the annual camp inspection
• Found hidden treasure
• Convinced Scoutmaster Lumpus to fall in love with a tree (seriously)
• Made a club out of absolutely nothing, which became more popular than Edward's club
• Survived a fall from a waterfall that nobody has ever lived to tell the tale for
• Stopped Edward from pantsing everyone in camp
• He and Raj disguised themselves as Lumpus' parents to cheer him up (although this heavily backfired)
• Assisted Lumpus in earning his Handy Helper badge
• Snapped Clam out of the Love Sick virus
• Broke the world record for stacking beans
• Saved Edward from a violent beating by Ms. Mucus
• Saved Camp Kidney from closing
• Directed a play for the camp
• Defeated Ms. Mucus and retrieved all of Camp Kidney's confiscated toys
• Has talked angry mobs out of their harmful deeds
• Tamed a grizzly bear in two separate episodes
• Came up with a plan to freeze a caveman that was attacking Samson
• Managed to get Camp Kidney put on a map
• Stopped a volcano from erupting
• Helped Nurse Leslie get his job back
• Tricked Lumpus into thinking he hated Camp Kidney
• Outsmarted a group of clowns, despite being afraid of them
• Briefly "fixed" Samson's bad luck by confronting the Scoutmaster in the Sky
• Literally saved Christmas

---

Wiz: You can thank these for how he's stronger than he looks. To start things off, Lazlo is often shown as comparable to Clam in strength, who once burped with so much force that it pushed the entire moon out of orbit at a rapid pace!

Boomstick: That's me after having one too much Coca-Cola. Allow me to demonstrate.

Boomstick releases a burp so loud that it causes the South Pole to melt away, thus causing Club Penguin to shut down. Again.

Wiz: Rookie.

Boomstick: I had, like, ten cans. Cut me some slack.

Wiz: On a related note, Lazlo himself is capable of shattering the entire moon, as well as turning off all the light on Earth, just within the flick of a lantern.

Pop-Up: While this happened in the opening theme song, the theme itself has been directly referenced a few times in actual episodes, which makes it usable.

Boomstick: Lazlo is capable of turning the sun on (not in that way, you perverted bastards) after turning the planet pitch-black.

Wiz: Lazlo is on par with Scoutmaster Lumpus, who can similarly turn off the sun. Lumpus was also shown to be superior to the likes of Heffer Wolfe from Joe Murray's previous cartoon, Rocko's Modern Life.

Boomstick: How powerful is Heffer, you may ask? Powerful enough to have caused the sun to get blown out like a candle and cause an explosion that was visible from deep space, which he tanked at point-blank range!

Wiz: Lazlo, Raj and Clam once turned Earth upside down, and to perform that, you would need to at least yield in 2.58e29 Joules.

Boomstick: Even outside of these, Lazlo is still hella tough. He scales to Chip and Skip, both of whom once casually pushed down a mountain, only for it to crash into another one and cause many other mountains to fall onto each other like dominoes!

Wiz: He is capable of hurting Samson, who, despite being portrayed as a weakling most of the time, completely tanked a fall from Saturn to Earth!

Boomstick: With help from the rest of the Bean Scouts, Lazlo lifted a dinosaur skeleton that was almost bigger than a two-story house! Considering the opponent he's fighting today, that makes too much sense.

Trivia

• The connections between Lazlo and Sans are that they are playful slackers who can be highly tactical despite being shown as the opposite, and they regularly annoy tall egomaniacs (Scoutmaster Lumpus and Papyrus).
• This was decided through a poll on Discord. Hey, it was either this, or Lazlo vs Annoying Orange. Oh, and Lazlo vs SpongeBob