| Fighting is our life | |
|---|---|
 | |
| Season | 4 |
| Season Episode | 3 |
| Air date | 05-08-2022 |
| Written by | Cider621 |
| Episode guide | |
| Previous Kenny VS Frisk |
Next Tails VS Batman |
Description[]
Warning: Spoilers for Invincible[]
This contains spoilers for the Invincible comic in which the show has yet to catch up with
Connections[]
- Big
- Strong
- Were soldiers
- They love to fight, addicted to it
- Have beaten and incapacitated the Main Character
- Jasper knocked Steven out in one punch
- Battle Beast crushed Invincible's organs, essentially putting a hole through him
- Lost a battle and died for it
- Jasper lost to Pink State Steven
- Battle Beast lost to Thragg
Intro[]
Wiz: Fighting, the entire premise of the show, along with analyzation of the combat-
Boomstick: Punching is awesome! And these two are obsessed with it!
These Alien soldiers turned battle addicts will be duking it out in a battle to the death, something they're both used to
Jasper, the perfect Quartz soldier
And, Thokk, the Battle Beast
He's Wiz and i'm Boomstick
And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.
Jasper[]
During Earth's rebellion from the Gem Empire, A kindergarten was set up for the dwindling Homeworld forces
Yeah and the area wasn't really set for it alot of them coming out weird, usually tall and lanky, like Wiz
I- hey, well one of them charged out and immediately started fighting for her Diamond, Pink Diamond
Somehow Pink is the worst
Stated by Peridot, an intelligent gem, that this exit hole-
HAH!
Yeah, mature, well that this exit hole was perfect
And this Quartz soldier was known as, Jasper
It was said Jasper bursted out fighting
Sounds awesome
She was made a legend, even being dubbed "The Ultimate Quartz"
And the legend stays true cause she can kick everyone's ass
She can easily stomp most of the Crystal Gems
Her hands are E for Everyone
Even Garnet, the first Gem that put up a fight with her still had a very real shot at losing
Pearl and Amethyst can barely stand against her
She could easily tank 4.3 gigaton of TNT without so much as a scratch (As determined in Invincible vs Steven Universe)
She's faster than the average Crystal Gem, including Pearl who can react to 1/3rd the speed of light
She also held her own against Pink State Steven, until he actually started trying
Yeah, then she got flattened by a giant spike-wall
More so shattered, but that's besides the point
She could lift well up to 275,831.49 tons
Like all Gems, Jasper has weapons and techniques
She does her best Sonic reference by spinning forward to barrel through anything in her path
She also has a giant crash helmet she can use to make her headbutts even stronger, matching Garnet's gauntlets in power
Her main attack is headbutting? That's actually pretty bad ass
She mixes hand-to-hand combat with her weapon seamlessly as her weapon is on her head
So she's a bad ass who mixes good 'ol fisticuffs with her weapons? Awesome
She also generally has no respect for people weaker than her, and sometimes stronger if they used means she deemed unfair
Like Garnet's Love song? What the h- Oh shit this love song is the coolest love song I've ever heard
In fact sometimes it takes so much for her to respect people, Steven had to accidentally kill her to gain her respect
Reminds me of Great Grandpappy Boomstick, Grandpappy Boomstick had to kill him so he could become his own man
Normal families don't do that
Obviously, that's why I didn't kill Mama Boomstick
Is everyone on your Mom's side named Boomstick?!
Yeah, the one's we don't talk to anymore
Anyway, Jasper really does earn her name as the perfect soldier
| “ | Fighting is my life! It's what I was made for. | „ |
Battle Beast[]
On his home planet, he was a guardian
Constantly fighting for it he grew addicted, happens to the best of us
He would leave his planet to seek out worthy opponents
His name was Thokk but he chose to go by a much more bad-ass name, Battle Beast
Battle Beast is incredibly powerful, he could take on even Viltrumites, effortlessly being able to beat the likes of "weaker" ones like Omni-Man
Who can hit with a force of 14.1 petatons of TNT (As determined in Invincible VS Steven Universe)
He effortlessly stomped the New Guardians of the Globe, almost killing several of them
Yeah, he's not here to fight little bitch fighters so he got out of there
Later in the series he even fought against the likes of Thragg
Even though he lost, he fought evenly with him for days
Thragg even collapsed after he had finished him
And Thragg can tank a force of 28.2 petatons of TNT with just his arms! (As determined in Invincible VS Steven Universe)
Meaning Battle Beast certainly compared considering he had fought after that
Let alone how fast they could've been fighting
Omni-Man even in the beginning of the series could go up to 221 times the speed of light (As determined in Invincible VS Steven Universe) and they were likely moving faster
And he's not just a punch and kick type guy, he also has and array of weapons
He has a mastery with his sword, axe, and mace
His legs are strong enough that he can jump and basically be flying, like Hulk
His teeth are so sharp they can pierce pretty much any opponent
Remember how we said he fought for days? Well he didn't show any signs of tiring outside of his injuries likely wearing him down
He has portals, while he usually uses them for transportation he can also use them to get out of a situation
Not that he would, he'd only leave a fight if they were that weak
That’s right Boomstick
And, sadly his mission to find a worthy opponent ended in his death
In his final moments, he thanked Thragg for giving him his worthy fight
| “ | This is not a game! This is what I live for! This is my life! | „ |
Pre-Battle[]
Alright, with the combatants all set and the data run through all possibilities, let's end this debate once and for all
It's time for a Death battle!
Battle[]
Jasper: Doing forest things in her forest home
A portal opens near her
Jasper: Huh? She looks over
Battle Beast: Steps out You there, I was told this world had worthy opponents
Jasper: …She then smiles Yeah, me
Battle Beast: Then let’s not waste more time
Jasper: She gets ready Yeah
Battle Beast: He jumps at her
Jasper: She jumps too and throws a punch
Battle Beast: Knocks her fist away to punch her in the gut
Jasper: Guh-!?
Battle Beast then used his other fist to knock her away, but she lands on her feet and slides back knocking trees over as she slides
Jasper: Heh, you call that a hit? I’m gonna get the ball rolling!
She then charges at him and starts spinning in a ball towards him, ripping the ground up as she rushes at him. He manages to catch her, his hands beginning to get cut some. She uncurls and as time appears to slow her helmet appears on her head as he looks up to see her grinning as she headbutts him down she then clenches her fists and starts punching him rapidly before grabbing and throwing him so hard a sonic boom goes off.
Jasper: Showed that cat, didn’t I? She begins to leave before she hears fast stomping, she turns once more Wha-
Battle Beast: Runs straight through a boulder, mace in hand (paw?), and backhands a tree uprooting it as he grabs it and hurls it at her
She catches it as he then drop-kicks the other end the tree falls apart as he basically forces it through her before he himself drop-kicks her. She falls onto her back, he then stomps on her pelvis and raises his mace
Battle Beast: I had thought maybe you’d satisfy my need for a good fight He slams his mace down
Jasper: She catches it before it hits her chest You don’t understand, you’re going to be my satisfaction
In his slight shock she snatches the mace and quickly flips it to swing it knock him of of her, he falls away but quickly gets up as she does
Battle Beast: So you do understand
Jasper: She has a quick moment of realization Oh, I do
They charge at each other
Both: Fighting is my LIFE!
She swings his mace at him, as he ducks and tackles her making her drop the mace, he then throws her abit away to catch his mace before it even hits the ground
She charges as he swings his mace, her helmet and his mace clash causing a shockwave that rings out across the forest knocking over trees and shattering boulders, they keep clashing helmet and mace
Battle Beast eventually gets hit on the side of her head shattering the goggles on her helmet he then sparta kicks her away before running up and getting a big hit with hit mace which sends her flying
As Jasper flies through the air she notices the beach near and rushes to land in the ocean
Battle Beast, running after Jasper makes it to the beach only to not find her, before she rushes out of the water in a ball taking him by surprise and rushing into him ripping his clothes and even drawing blood as it falls on her and the sand before he can throw her off and roars and charges at her not even picking up mace slashing at her with his claws
Her clothes are torn some before she jumps up and uses him as a platform to launch herself into the air at the same time as hitting him back, while in the air she then charges back down a yellow aura around her as he attempts to catch the huge attack
As she lands it forms a huge crater blows sand away the speed and power of the clash forms the outer rim of the sand crater into sand, it’s revealed that he managed to catch the attack as he throws her to the ground as they starts to just punch each other over and over before she head butts him to the ground as she attempts to lunge atop him, he raises his feet to lift her and throw her away he then notices his mace nearby and he lifts it
She spins towards him as he time his mace swing and swings as hard as he can right as she’s in the sweet spot, she poofs he flinches slightly before noticing she’s gone
Battle Beast: Hm. Abit of a disappointing end He lifts his mace to his shoulder and starts to walk away before noticing a glow behind him
Right as he turns he gets a savage headbutt to the face knocking a few teeth out as his nose bleeds profusely and he stumbles back
Jasper: It won’t be that easy! She starts punching him around uncontested
He then knees her in the gut once he gets an opening deciding to throw her, he spreads his legs and feet some and jumps after her going above her and stomping on her as they barrel towards to ground, but then, she spins after grabbing him so he’s on bottom as her yellow aura reappears forcing them both to the ground as another even larger crater forms eating the other one
Battle Beast: He lays still, licking his own blood. Mm… He then gets up so hard he launches himself into the air he then kicks her away
Jasper: She’s stunned How, how’re you still standing?!
Battle Beast: Because He smiles You call that a hit?
Jasper: She stutters angrily
They charge at each other once more as they punch each other as fast as they can before he readies a claw and once the opportunity opens he rams his claws right through her torso
Jasper: G-guh-!? She grabs onto him and leans to stay standing
Battle Beast: Thank you…for the fight
Jasper: She stutters some, barely able to keep her form …Heh-...you’re welcome She poofs
Battle Beast: He catches her airborne gem in his mouth and chomps down it cracks at first, then shatters … he pops his neck opens a portal and walks through
KO!!!!!
Results[]
Wiz, that was probably our realest fight yet
Right you are Boomstick
Battle Beast is so cool, and so is- was Jasper
While Jasper did have a few advantages, like experience, mobility, even size and, a slight arsenal advantage; Thokk had her beat in terms of nearly everything else
While Jasper could basically fly Battle Beast could fall with style
And while Jasper did have better experience and a better arsenal of moves, Battle Beasts own experience would lead him to know how to deal with an opponent of better arsenal
Let alone how much stronger and durable he is
Thokk’s best feats eclipse Jasper’s by a beastly 65,581.3 times difference
Damn!
So Battle Beast had the means and power to put Jasper down for good
Looks like the Battle Beast buried her
The Winner is Thokk, the Battle Beast
Next Time[]
Battle Track[]
