This is a what-if Deathbattle created by Stevethebarbarian, pitting Jason Voorhees from the Friday the Thirteenth series against Slenderman, Jeff the Killer, the Rake, Eyeless Jack, and Laughing Jack. This is Stevethebarbarian's Series Premiere, as well as his first season premiere.
Credit to: Just a Fake Account
Description[]
Friday the Thirteenth Vs Creepypasta! Will Jason prevail over the mob of killers, or will he join his mother in Hell?
Interlude[]
Wiz: Killers.
Boomstick: They haunt our dreams and stalk our... internet pages.
Today, we will pit some of the most memorable internet-spawned horrors against Jason, the killer that made the Slasher genre.
He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills, to see who would win, a DeathBattle.
Jason Voorhees[]
Jason Voorhees. Poor kid.
Born hideously deformed and probably mentally retarded, he was often bullied, sometimes with nearly murderous intent.
Sounds like someone we're gonna to run into later. Go on Wiz, what happened to the kid?
Well, his mother, Pamela Voorhees, decided to send him to camp, and chose the now-infamous Camp Crystal Lake.
Yeah, sounds familiar. The place where my second wife was raised. I hate that place.
UUmm, no, this was probably a different Crystal Lake.
Oh. My bad. Go on.
Anyway, Jason coudn't swim very well, so it was the responsibility of the counselors to make sure he didn't drown in the lake.
Oh, but nooo, they were to sexy for that, and decided to get bangin'.
While they were... distracted, Jason drowned.
Not Ben?
No, not Ben.
Anyway, Jason's mom, Pamela, natrually got a little angry, and did the only logical thing. She went on a killing spree.
Pamela was an effective killer, but not a supernatrual one, and was eventually beheaded by one of the kids she was trying to kill.
And Jason got mad!
Yep, somehow little baby Voorhees managed to come back to life, grow to adulthood, despite being a zombie, and donned a burlap sack as a disguise and went on a revenge killing spree.
Yeah, he was pretty... A BURLAP SACK???
That's right. He didn't get the hockey mask until Friday the Thirteenth 3.
Sooo... Friday the Sixteenth?
Uh, sure.
Well, Jason isn't an average zombie. He is ten times stronger than the average dude.
Aha, he has been hypothosized to be able to lift 2 tons or more... sometimes much more.
Shut up Wiz.
Huh?
This is my part.
Umm, ok.
Jason never chases his victims, but he is always just standing there waiting for them when they try to ecscape.
This is usually referred to as...
Slasherporting. But a lot of people think that this is a real teleportation ability. I think so too. Duh. What, did the screenwriters just forget where Jason was? I think not.
Boomstick, it's called "dramatic susp..."
SHUT UP WIZ!
Urk! Ok, ok, you can do Jason's powers! Gosh.
Jason can also heal with extraordinary rapidity, effectively negating most physical damage. That was my tribute to Wiz.
Thanks, I guess.
Jason's machete has been lost a couple of times, but (To my knowledge, people!) it has never been broken, despite stabbing into trees, cyborgs, child-murderers from Hell, and all kinds of other crap. He also likes bows, axes, and the occasional pitchfork. In fact, pretty much his only weakness is his subconscious fear of water and the fact that he is, so. So. Slow. Oh, and did I forget to mention, Jason was captured by the United States government, who failed to kill him! They failed after apparently trying several times. Excuse me, but if the US government can't do it, even when they have him captured, I don't know who can. Jason is definitely not someone you want to mess with.
But is he as strong as a veritable army of creepypastas?
Well, let's find out. But make it quick. I hate these guys.
Slenderman[]
Note: As there are dozens, no hundreds of conflicting reports on exactly what Slender can do, I will be taking his info directly from the Slenderman Wiki, which I assume is a reliable source.
Slenderman...
The grandaddy of all Creepypastas. He has games, fan films, official mythos, god, why is this guy so popular?
Slender, as he is often called, has some pretty obvious abilities we can see in his games. He can teleport, and he can instantly kill you if you look him in the eye for too long.
I have a question Wiz.
Yes, Boomstick?
What eye?
Uuummm... if you look him in the head for too long.
Thanks.
Anyway, he can also use his tendrils to accelerate his movement when he isn't teleporting, which is rare, or to attack his foes.
He can mind-control certain enemies, or cause them to go insane.
He can camouflage himself, easily blending in to the environment, but can do nothing to change his freakish height.
Oh, and this is where it gets creepy. Slenderman can also perfectly mimic the voice of anyone, easily tricking people into coming near him. He can also giggle like a child. Wiz, I think I'm rooting for Jason.
I see. Well, he can also control fire, although this has mostly only been used to destroy witnesses, and not the person he is actually attacking.
And one more thing. HE CAN CHANGE THE TIME OF DAY!
And the weather. Slenderman often adds fog to an area to decrease visibility.
Uuugh I hate this guy! Next!
Jeff the Killer[]
Jeff the killer was originally just a kid. His name...
Jeff. What did you expect?
Jeff was a poor kid, always bullied, picked on...
Like you?
No. Nothing like me.
What, you mean the kids bullying you didn't pour gasoline on your face and try to kill your friend?
Yeah. Pretty much.
Yeah, long story short, Jeff got scarred, went insane, lost his eyelids, killed his parents, and then killed a lot of other people.
Jeff the killer isn't your average psychopathic serial killer though. He actually sneaks into your house when you are sleeping, crawls onto your bed, raises his kitchen knife, and says...
Don't say it.
Huh?
Don't. Say. It. I won't be able to sleep for a month.
Um... ok. Well, he says something along the lines of... get some rest, I guess?
Yeah. Go to sleep... Urgh... I even scared myself.
Right. He says... that... and then stabs you through the heart, before escaping and evading the police. His only weakness...
The very thing that made him who he is today... fire.
Well, that's only speculation. Anyway, Jeff has a pretty impressive healing factor, and has survived plenty of bullet and knife wounds, but that is where the fire comes in.
According to some sources, Jeff can't heal burns, which would explain... you know... his hideous burns.
Jeff is apparently very skilled with a knife, and is unarguably extremely stealthy.
You really don't want to mess with this guy. Ugh... next!
The Rake[]
Very little is known about the strange creature known as the Rake.
Mostly because almost no one has encountered him and lived, and most who have lived... kill themselves.
Well, lots of them. The most comprehensive story about the Rake comes from a woman in 2006. One day, she was woken up by a noise from her bedroom.
Figuring that it was her husband up and about, she did exactly what any of my former wives would have done. She stole the covers. Waking up her husband, still in bed. Ugh.
The woman was surprised that he wasn't up, and her husband was surprised that the Rake was at the foot of their bed.
The lady figured "I had better take care of this, it looks hurt!" God. Some women. If I was that guy I would have shotgunned it so fast...
The Rake jumped up in her husbands face and sat there for a few seconds before rushing to the children's room. The parents rushed in only to find their daughter mortally wounded, and the Rake gone.
That husband did just as he should have, and rushed her to the hospital. Unfortunately, he was stupid enough to drive into a lake and killed them both. Oops.
The woman, from then on, left a tape-recorder on her nightstand on all night, for the rest of her life. It turned out, the Rake visited her again, possibly more than once, without ever waking her up.
Oh, god. I am so glad that I have a Super Shotgun for a leg. At least I have a weapon to fight a demon like it... speaking of that, what can it actually do?
There isn't much to say about the rake, as far as it's abilities are concerned. He is extremely quick and stealthy, and has, just like most Creepypastas and Slasher villains, the ability to evidently teleport.
He can deal mortal injuries to someone in just a matter of moments.
And the worst part is... he doesn't even have to.
Yep. This thing is so terrifying that you go insane just by looking at it, and it's eyes will haunt you... forever. Ugh. Next!
Eyeless Jack[]
Eyeless Jack was originally a straight-A high school student, with a great life.
That is actually a really bad sign.
Jack became affiliated with a girl named Jenny, who was a part of a cult.
Not surprising. Continue.
Well, this cult decided to sacrifice Jack to the demon they worshiped.
Again, exactly as I suspected. Let me guess... they tore out his eyes, he was possessed by the demon, and he brutally murdered all of them.
Yep.
I knew it.
Jack lost his eyes, gained long, razor-sharp claws and teeth, and a taste for human kidneys. He apparently, and almost unbelievably can't slasherport!
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT????? (Ridiculous MLG music and air-horns go off)
He also evidently has the ability to massively wound people without making them bleed, feel any pain, or die.
Huh?
Yep. In the original Eyeless Jack story, he managed to severely lacerate the cheek of a kid without waking him up. And get this. He also sliced open his chest and ripped out one of his kidneys. And the kid didn't notice!
(Lifts shirt) Nope, still there. I am definitely checking for my kidneys from now on. Next!
Laughing Jack[]
Hey, Boomstick, name some things you hate.
Uuh, ok... Creepypastas, Zangeif, the bastard, my ex-wife, '22 pistols, people who hate DeathBattle-
Not the ones I'm looking for. Name number 1.
Clowns. Terrible, terrible clowns.
How about a creepypasta who is also a clown, and who tortures and mutilates children?
No. You aren't talking about...
Laughing Jack.
NOOOOOOOO!!!! Not him!
Yes. Laughing Jack's origins are completely unknown.
Well, some people say that he was originally a normal clown, but then got murdered/murdered somebody, and became a ghost/got possessed, all depending on the story. Did I mention I hate this guy?
Uum, yes.
Jack is very stealthy, and can easily teleport, and he also has some weird, freaky, stretchy arms.
Well, that is only according to certain pastas.
He does. Trust me Wiz. Trust me.
He can also talk, rare for a creepypasta, or a slasher villain, for that matter.
That voice... that voice.
Boomstick, you sound like you have actually met this guy.
September 9th, 1984.
Oh, god. What happened?
Y' know my missing leg?
Oh, my god... owch.
Now you know why I hate clowns. May Jason kill them all! IT'S TIME FOR A DEATHBATTLE!!!
Pre-Fight[]
Jason Voorhees was walking through the woods near Crystal Lake. He had just ended another killing spree, and wanted to lie low for a while. He had had enough of killing for the year. He walked to the shrine he had built to his mother, adjusted his mask, and lied down on the ground and closed his eyes.
Jason's senses were highly acute, but not enough to sense the approach of Jeff the Killer and Eyeless Jack. Jeff and Jack had an agreement. Jeff would get the kill on this psycho, but Jack could have his kidney. A mutually beneficial agreement. They also agreed to get the heck out of there before he showed up.
Jeff stealthed over to the prostrate Jason and keeled over him with his knife.
"Go to sleep..."
Fight![]
He thrust the knife into the Crystal Lake Killer, who immediately opened his eyes and got up, sending Jeff flying. Jason looked at his chest, saw the knife, pulled it out and tossed it aside. He had much better weapons. He picked up his trademark machete and started walking silently and slowly toward the scarred killer who had ambushed him.
"Damn, that guy is tough. I expected that stab to at least slow him down. But I am better than him. He can't beat me!"
Jeff pulled another knife out of nowhere and advanced on Jason. Eyeless Jack was annoyed. If he left this to that idiot Jeff, he would never get his meal. He began sneaking up behind Jason. Jeff charged Jason with his knife and left nothing to chance, stabbing straight at his neck.
Jason took the knife to the neck, and countered by impaling Jeff through the torso with his machete. Jeff pulled out the knife and stabbed Jason in the solar plexus, before backing off to heal. Jason was allowing himself to heal as well, when Eyeless Jack started lacerating his back, removing his organs one at a time. Jason didn't notice.
Jeff started chuckling at the ridiculousness of the scene before him. Eyeless Jack had removed both of Jason's kidneys, one of his lungs, his liver, his large intestine, and his pancreas, and was reaching for his heart. As soon as he touched it, however, he began to experience a unexplanable urge to immediately eat it. He bit out at it, but the moment he came close to his heart, Jason noticed.
Jason swung around with his machete, lopping off one of Jack's arms, and realized that half of his torso was on the ground. He stepped back, in mild surprise, and didn't notice Jeff coming back up from behind, who stabbed him in the small of his back. Jason struck out with his bare hand, throwing the white-faced killer through the air once again.
Eyeless Jack charged with the claws on his remaining hand and razor-sharp teeth, and slashed Jason across the chest before biting into his neck, nearly beheading him. Jason had had enough, and pulled Jeff's knife out of his back and stabbed Jack with it repeatedly, before snapping his neck and breaking his head off of his torso.
KO! Creepypastas- 4/5[]
As Eyeless Jack lost his life, a lone figure in the woods, hunched over and malformed, muttered- "Jassson..."
Jeff stepped back, surprised at the brutal death of his comrade, and the fact that Jason was already half-healed from the massive wounds that had been inflicted on him by the creepypasta killers. He realized that this would be harder than he expected. He decided to stab right for the skull.
He attacked Jason viciously with his knife, stabbing, as he planned, for the head. "Go to sleep!"
Jason countered, and eventually got off a lucky stab because Jeff's knife, his third he had used, curiously, was caught in Jason's mask. Jason stabbed Jeff through the underside of his chin and into his brain, snapping back his machete, breaking Jeff's neck in the process, and then stabbing through his spine. Jeff survived, but was knocked unconscious.
Jason dragged Jeff's body through the woods, and picked him up near a large tree. He ripped off both of Jeff's arms and then pinned him to the tree with his own knife, and stalked off. Nearby, he was stalked by two figures, each unaware of the presence of the other. Unbeknownst to one of them, Jason was fully aware of his presence, and began walking slowly toward his hiding spot.
"Uh, oh, looks like little Jason want's to play a game. This will be fun!"
Laughing Jack, his scarred, grey, terrifying face a mess of small scratches and face-paint, stepped out of the shadows to face Jason. Jack stretched his rubberlike arms toward Jason, claws extended, and slashed at his chest. Jason tried to block with his arms and machete, but was unable to.
"HEHEHEHE! Are you having fun yet? But you are very pretty, you should stop hiding behind your toys!"
Jack grabbed at Jason's mask and machete, pulling them both away from him, and Jason, now revealed, felt a touch of rage, a very rare thing. He loved those "toys," and he wasn't going to let this clown take them from him. He started walking a little faster.
"Ooh, you look worse than me! That isn't a problem though. I will still play with you, no matter how ugly you are!"
Jason began walking a bit quicker.
"My, my, isn't that uncharacteristic! Your mother and I were actually quite good friends! She was a very nice woman! I knew her in Hell. Aah, isn't it nice when someone is exactly where they belong..."
At this point, Jason was incredibly enraged. Not only had this freak taken his mask and machete, he had also poked fun at his mother! Jason, at this point, and for the first time in his life as a zombie, began to run. He charged at Laughing Jack with his fists raised, and punched him in the face.
He then grabbed Jack, held him over his head, and ripped him in half. Jack's lower and upper body both turned to black smoke and regenerated a few yards away.
"Well, that wasn't nice!"
Jason picked up his machete, grabbed his mask, put it back on, and set out to brutally kill his second-least favorite person.
Meanwhile, a few hundred yards away...
Jeff the Killer was finally regenerating from his wounds. His arms were barely stumps, and he was still pinned to the tree, but he was regaining consciousness. He looked up. And he saw him.
"No... No. No! NO! NO!!!"
Jeff struggled, tried to escape, free his body, cover his eyes, look away, anything but this. But he failed. Finally, Jeff the Killer was no more.
KO! Creepypastas- 3/5[]
Back at Jack and Jason's fight, near Crystal Lake
Jason swung his machete, constantly slicing Jack's limbs and torso, but Jack just regenerated. Jack, on the other hand, was able to do no damage to Jason, and wasn't enjoying being repeatedly lacerated, so he fled. Jason followed, slowly, some of his rage abated. However, after Freddy, this clown was still his least-favorite person.
Jason followed after him until Jack found himself stuck between a Crystal Lake and a hard place. Namely, Jason. He searched the deepest corners of Jason's mind and found his hydrophobia.
"Do you like tag, Jason? Catch me if you can!"
Jack turned entirely to black smoke and floated across the lake. Jason stepped up the the lake's banks and hesitated. He stood at the lake, staring at Laughing Jack for what seemed like an eternity. He then silently turned away and walked off.
"Phew. I was tired of playing with him anyway."
Ki, Ki, Ki, Ma, Ma, Ma
Jack walked off into the woods, glad that the fight was over. He never heard Jason coming. Jason, somehow right behind him, slashed downward, slicing him down the middle. He then simply hacked the pieces of Jack's body into piece after piece, until he was sure Jack couldn't regenerate.
KO! Creepypastas- 2/5[]
There he went. Jason felt a touch of sadness. He had no one to hate. He then felt a feeling of intense... peace. Much like he had felt after finishing the earlier massacre. Jason decided he had had enough of killing. His mother had been avenged enough. He was done. Fate wasn't having it. He still had two more kills to pull off.
Jason walked off, trying to find a good hidden place to rest. He found a nice cool cave, and lied down once again.
"Jassson..."
Jason sat up.
"Jaaaasssssoooon..."
Jason stood up and grabbed his machete. Another one. He was suddenly attacked from behind by a hideous naked creature, The Rake. Jason struggled to reach the Rake, as it was attached to his back. It grabbed at his neck with it's claws, spun, and snapped it. Jason fell and the Rake dragged him away to feed.
Jason suddenly grabbed the monster and slammed it against the ground, before getting up and simply snapping his neck back into place. He debated whether to go back for his machete, and decided not to at the moment, figuring that he didn't need it.
The Rake dashed at him clawing at his throat and eyes. Thankfully for him, Jason's freakishly durable mask was strong enough to prevent him from being blinded, and he countered with a punch that sent the Rake flying.
Jason stalked over to the seemingly dead Rake, and stepped on it. It instantly leapt up and tore at his leg. Jason, not surprised in the least, simply increased the pressure he placed on the body of the Rake, beginning to crack it's ribs. The Rake began to panic. This wasn't it's plan.
The helpless creature slashed brutally at the leg of the Crystal Lake Killer, finally splitting all the muscles and leaving the leg useless. The Rake leapt backward and stared Jason in the eye. Jason didn't react, simply holding back and waiting for his leg to heal. The Rake stared with more intensity, but nothing happened. This had never happened before.
Jason, deciding that his leg had sufficiently healed, stepped at the Rake. He punched at it, but it evaded with it's great speed and bit his hand. Jason would have cried out in pain, had he been capable of feeling pain. He then punched it with all of his strength, breaking it's jaw and releasing it's hold.
The Rake wasn't done yet, though. It slashed at Jason with it's claws, wounding his chest, and then stabbed him through the wounds, impaling him and nearly tearing out his heart. Jason wasn't having it.
He grabbed at it by the arms and tore one off, before ripping it in half at the waist. He took it by the other arm and began repeatedly slamming it into the ground with massive force, before he took it up by the throat, snapped it's neck, and smashed it's skull into the ground, shattering it and splattering it's brains. The Rake was no more.
KO! Creepypastas- 1/5[]
Jason picked up his machete and walked outside the cave, now convinced that there must be one more. There was always a leader. As he stalked through the forest, he stepped into a clearing and saw him. Slenderman. The two tall killers stared each other down silently, before a shadow from a tree suddenly moved quickly, enveloping Slender, and he disappeared. Jason walked away silently. And he heard it.
"Jason! Jaaason! Are you there honey? I have been looking for you for so long! Please come to me, my son!"
Jason was, for the first time in his life, absolutely shocked. His mother??? She had been dead for so long... But he could never forget her voice. He ran toward the voice, which seemed to be coming from the direction of Crystal Lake. Jason got to the bank and looked around. Where was she? WHERE WAS SHE???
Then he saw him. Slenderman stood at the water's edge, calling out in the voice of his mother. Jason had never even conceived the idea of one disrespecting his mother so greatly! His rage was completely unmatched. He looked at Slender, and the ultimate creepypasta wheeled out his big guns.
Jason was suddenly struck in the head by an unseen force, and began to become dizzy, and lose focus, and then consciousness. Jason fell to his knees, and then to his face. Jason was dead, a victim of Slender's ultimate attack.
Slenderman, satisfied with the death of Jason and his other rivals, turned away, but spun back around at hearing a blast of lighting and the boom of thunder. Jason lived! The Crystal Lake Killer arose from the dead, getting back up in a great rage, and thus began the true battle.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
FINAL BATTLE- BEGIN![]
Slender and Jason stared each other down, before Jason started moving slowly in the direction of Slenderman. Fog began to fill the area, blacking out the two fighter's vision of each other, courtesy of Slender. Slenderman teleported behind Jason, but was surprised to see that Jason wasn't there.
He was, on the other hand, standing partially behind a tree a few meters away. Jason began walking toward Slender, machete at the ready. Slenderman looked behind him and saw Voorhees advancing, and shot out two of his tendrils to attack Jason.
Jason began swinging his blade at the black tentacles, but they evaded his strikes while countering with their own, slowly but surely harming Jason faster than he could heal, every strike introducing two new wounds, while only one healed. The tendrils than picked up the Crystal Lake Killer, and threw him into the distance, outside of Slender's line of sight.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
Slender moved silently but quickly in Jason's direction, but was surprised to be attacked by Jason, suddenly standing inches in front of him, simply stepping out from behind a tree. Slender took a minor scratch from the machete, and began to bleed black ooze, but countered efficiently with his tendrils, double-impaling Jason through the torso.
Slender took Jason and repeatedly slammed him against the ground, cracking several bones, and then smacked him against the ground hard enough to dislodge him. The slasher got to his feet as if nothing had happened, and stepped a few feet to the side, hiding his tall frame behind a nearby tree.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
Slenderman peeked his head behind the tree, but was not surprised at all that Jason was suddenly gone. He could play this game too.
The sound of static is heard- 'kchsh
Jason looked up from where he had just teleported, and saw Slenderman before him. Slender would have smiled, had he had a mouth, and looked a bit to the side, hearing a noise. Jason was there. Jason opened his eyes, and saw Slenderman looking right back at him.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, kchsh-kchsh-kchsh
The creepypasta and the slasher were both experiencing quite a bit of consternation. Wherever the one looked, the other was, just staring at them. Evidently, they both had had the same plan. Jason was fed up. He wasn't having it.
Slender teleported again, but didn't see Jason. How had he evaded him? He looked around.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
That sound again. Slender had learned to hate that sound. He stalked silently around, when suddenly Jason attacked from behind him. Jason swung his machete, slicing the end off of one of Slenderman's tendrils, and waving it at Slender himself.
The Creepypasta wasn't about to let that happen, and attacked Jason with several tendrils, attacking all at once. Jason was being overwhelmed, and realized that he would have to take a risk to escape. He lifted his machete above his head- and threw.
The blade sliced through the air, severing one of the tendrils and lodging itself in Slenderman's chest, injuring him rather badly. Jason then practically waded through the tentacles, getting sprayed by black blood in the process, and grabbed two of the tentacles by the roots, ripping them out of Slender's back.
Slenderman was enraged, and did something a bit uncharacteristic, reaching out with his arms and bodily picking up the Crystal Lake Killer, throwing him onto his extended tendrils, triple-impaling him this time, just as Jason was healing from the earlier wounds.
Slender then tore his tendrils apart, tearing off huge pieces of Jason's torso. Jason reached out desperately, taking hold of his machete and pulling it out of Slenderman's torso, causing another prodigious spouting of black ooze. He then sliced another tendril and caught Slender in a bear hug, and began to crush him.
Slender realized that even with all of his tendrils and limbs, Jason was simply stronger, and he couldn't get out on his own. He tried something new. He stepped back a few feet, then a few more, eventually stepping into Crystal Lake. Jason didn't panic, but did begin to consider backing off.
No.
Jason Voorhees wasn't giving up. Not against the one who had been so disrespectful to his mother. He would make him pay. They submerged. Jason didn't let go.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
Slender fought back with all of his strength. Jason didn't let go.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma!
Slenderman stabbed viciously, dealing massive damage to Jason with his tendrils and drove his long fingers into his wounded torso. Jason didn't let go.
Ki, Ki, Ki, Ma, Ma, Ma!
Slenderman dove deep into Jason's subconscious, and found a weakness, one hidden even deeper than his hydrophobia. His heart. Slender freed a single tendril, and stabbed, at the same time striking out at Jason's mask, cracking it down the middle.
Jason, stabbed through the heart, the only thing he really needed to live, released his grip on Slender, lost consciousness, and began to drift away.
In his mind, Jason saw them. He saw his mother, his dear mother. He saw Freddy Kruger, the only one before now who had been able to come close to matching his strength. He saw Ginny Field, the first person he had ever failed to kill. And he saw himself... before.
His mother spoke.
"Dear, you wouldn't give up now! Not after what that... thing has done! You couldn't."
Then came Ginny.
"Jason. You aren't really a monster. You want to give up your rampaging. Make one final kill, and prove it."
He spoke himself.
"I'm dead Jason. You're left. Make sure people don't forget us."
Finally, the scarred face of Freddy Kruger, floating in his subconscious, spoke up.
"C'mon, fuckface, if there is one thing I've learned... it's that you can't kill Jason, bitch! Get up!"
Slenderman, satisfied that he had finally killed the slasher, walked off into the woods, still dripping blood, his body broken and bleeding, and most of his tendrils severed.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
Jason lived!
Slenderman turned around, having realized that Jason was still a threat. Had he been at all capable of emotion, he would have felt fear.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
Jason stepped silently out of the water, and began slowly walking toward Slender.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
He took one step, and then another, and then another, and then another. Slenderman prepared himself.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
Jason raised his machete and swung as Slenderman shot his two remaining tendrils at Jason. The slasher managed to sever one of the with his blade, but the other struck right in between the two pieces of his mask, still attatched to his face, and drove in, nearly piercing his skull. Jason wasn't having it.
He grabbed the black tendril and physically pulled it out of his face, and then pulled it toward him, yanking Slenderman closer with every pull, despite the creepypasta's every attempt to avoid it. Jason grabbed him and held him over his head, before slamming him down on his knee with enough force to break Slender's back. Even he has a spine.
Ki, ki, ki, ma, ma, ma.
Jason then held Slenderman by the top of the head, staring him in the "eyes." He raised his machete. The strike fell. Slender's body hit the ground, but his head was still in Jason's hand, with both ends of the neck spouting the creepypasta's black blood like gory fountains. Jason threw the head over his shoulder, and walked quietly away into the woods. No human would ever see him again. He would still miss the mask, though.
KO!!![]
JAAAAASON LIIIVES!!! And the creepypastas don't! Best. Kill. EVER!!!
The pastas had the advantage in numbers and variety of ablities, but that couldn't make up for the fact that Jason was simply too powerful.
I mean, this guy has tanked more shit than... almost anything. His healing factor is almost perfect. Speaking of "almost" perfect, how did he survive the heart shot?
Well, theoretically, Jason can be killed by a shot to the heart. Yeah, in the same way that Freddy is helpless if you aren't scared of him.
To tell the truth, it's absolutely obvious that his heart isn't all that important.
In the comics more than the movies, but in the movies as well, nonetheless, Jason has casually taken heart shots with no mention being made of it.
Not to mention the fact that Slenderman's stupid "Insta-kill" didn't do any physical damage to Jason, allowing him to easily revive.
Jason's healing factor meant that any damage the pastas did would be negated in a matter of just a few minutes, or even seconds, and he is much stronger than anything any of them have faced.
Yeah, they have only ever killed teens and random people, while Jason has gone toe-to toe with Freddy and Ash, and those are some dudes who you don't want to mess with.
Oh, and did I mention that this isn't even Jason's strongest form?
Yep, he still has Uber Jason, otherwise known as Jason X, possibly the most powerful slasher of all time.
But the thing is, he didn't even need it. Despite being much faster, they were simply completely outclassed.
Thankfully for me. And you. And the wooooorld.
In the end, the Creepypastas got slashed.
The winner is... motherfuckin' Jason, bitch! Yeah!!
Trivia[]
- This is Stevethebarbarian's first real What-If-Deathbattle.
- This trivia section was made for two reasons. One, Steve (me, obviously) is proud of the fact that this is within the top 100 longest pages on this wiki, and wanted to add a bit more information to make it even longer.
- The second reason is that I was simply conceited, and wanted to make myself look like an important contributor.
- The idea for this fight came from a simple desire to make a Jason fight, and the fact that Freddy Vs Jason, Predator Vs Jason, and Michael Myers Vs Jason were already taken.
- I still can't figure out what I was thinking when I came up with this.
- Curiously, I have never watched a single Friday the Thirteenth movie, but still consider myself a Jason fanboy, and hold with the result of this battle wholeheartedly.
- This is my first fight including Jason, the second being Jason Voorhees Vs Predator
- This trivia section just boosted this page from being the 97th longest to being the 84th longest page on this wiki.