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Goliath VS Batman
The Dark Knights
Season 5, Episode 13
Vital statistics
Air date September 29, 2018
Written by TheMetallicBlur
Directed by TheMetallicBlur
Episode guide
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Description[]

Gargoyles VS DC Comics. There are many creatures that go bump in the night that can strike fear into the hearts of many, but none do it better than these two. Will Batman get stoned the hard way? Will Goliath finally be conquered by his David? Stay tuned!

Interlude[]

(*Cues: Wiz and Boomstick - Brandon Yates*)

Wiz: The night is the time where most scary things go bump in the night.

Boomstick: Ghosts, zombies, vampires you name it.

Wiz: But all those things are sweet and friendly compared to these two creatures of justice.

Boomstick: Goliath, the stone-cold soldier with a beastly temper.

Wiz: And Batman, the genius crime-fighter with a menacing appearance.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a death battle.

Goliath[]

(*Cues: Demona and Goliath Theme - Gargoyles*)

Wiz: In times of old there were knights, kings, and lords. But what most history books don't teach you is that there were also gargoyles.

Boomstick: Probably because they were just too awesome. In ancient times, gargoyles were protectors of their castle and Goliath and his clan were no different.

Wiz: Goliath was named after the giant warrior who faced David in biblical times. During nighttime, Goliath and his clan would protect their castle from invaders and in return, their human companions would protect them during the day.

Boomstick: But life wasn't all nighttime and rainbows. Due to appearing different, Goliath and his clan faced prejudice from the people they protected, causing the king to force his men to smash the gargoyles. The ones that survived were sealed in stone forever.

Wiz: Well, not exactly. There was one criteria that had to be met for the spell to be broken. The gargoyles had to go above the clouds. So all hope seemed the lost the gargoyles would remain lifeless. That is until a man named David Xanatos had a crazy idea.

Boomstick: You ever notice that Xanatos also rhymes with Thanatos, the god of death?

Wiz: Xanatos bought the gargoyles after learning of them from a creature named Demona and decided to take them to his skyscraper that poked above the clouds.

Boomstick: Is this how rich people think? They just make their skyscrapers super large?

Wiz: Well, after nighttime poked around and the statues were above the clouds, the curse was broken and the gargoyles were free, going from the Wyvern Clan to the Manhattan Clan.

(*Cues: Suite 2 - Gargoyles*)

Boomstick: As the leader of the Manhattan Clan, Goliath is incredibly powerful.

Wiz: Goliath possesses superhuman strength, speed, and durability thanks to his gargoyle physiology.

Boomstick: He also has specila claws that he can use to rip his enemies apart.

Wiz: And he also has the ability to "glide" with his wings. However, Goliath cannot fly from ground level and needs to be at an elevated point.

Boomstick: Luckily for him, he can climb walls using his claws to to get to an elevated point.

Wiz: Goliath also has the ability to enter a special rage, increasing his strength and speed while making him a bit more violent.

Boomstick: As the leader of the Gargoyles, Goliath is incredibly powerful. He's strong enough bust through a wall and even rip apart metal.

Wiz: Pretty impressive since steel has a shear strength of about 49,200 PSI. He's even strong enough to bust through thick ice, wihch has a compressive strength of 25 megapascals.

Boomstick: He's fast enough to  outglide a Nazi plane, which can go at 494 miles per hour. He can dodge a bazooka, which can travel at 300 m/s. That's 671 miles per hour.

Wiz: He's even fast enough to dodge gunfire, which goes at 1700 miles per hour, over twice the speed of sound.

Boomstick: He's tough enough to survive a hit from an anti-aircraft weapon. He can withstand hits from Cyberbiotics drones, who can destroy other robots with ease.

Wiz: Goliath has also proven to be an incredibly skilled leader and strategist. He's battled and defeated several robots that resemble him as well as Oberon, a powerful magical god with his incredible smarts.

Boomstick: He's even defeated Macbeth, a warrior with centuries of combat experience with nothing but a mace. And he once hit a bike control panel accurately with a mere pipe. And he's taken on Nazis from World War 2 after traveling through time.

Wiz: But while Goliath is powerful in the night, in daytime, he turns to stone, rendering him helpless.

Boomstick: But when don't get on Goliath's bad side because no matter the timeline, he's still a vicious creature of the night.

(*Goliath wakes up from his slumber and grabs a soldier*)

Goliath: You are trespassing.

Batman[]

(*Cues: Main Title - Batman: Arkham Origins*)

Wiz: Bruce Wayne was a boy raised by two rich people, Thomas and Martha Wayne.

Boomstick: MARTHA!!!!

Wiz: After Bruce and his parents had come from the theater, a man named Joe Chill came out and gunned down his parents.

Boomstick: After the horrible incident, Bruce decided to train himself in every martial arts known to man and become the Dark Knight known as Batman.

(*Cues: The Dark Knight Trilogy (Action) - Lego Batman 3: Beyond Gotham*)

Wiz: Batman possesses incredible fighting power and capability. He wears the Batsuit, a special armor he wears layered with kevlar and other materials, enabling him to take things from knives to bullets. It also comes with an electrical security system to shock those who try to take the suit.

Boomstick: Bats wears a Ultility Belt that carries a number of different gadgets. He wields his iconic weapon, the Batarang. With this bad boy, Bats can either explode robots or disarm enemies, whether they wield swords or guns. He also elecitrcal Batarangs and explosive ones powerful enough to take out a military submarine.

Wiz: Batman also carries a grappling hook that he can use to reach new locations, tie up enemies, or bring them closer to him.

Boomstick: Bats also comes with with smoke bombs to confuse enemies. His cowl comes equipped with night vision, infrared, and ultrasonic weaponry.

Wiz: Bats also specializes in the use of the shadows to sneak up on enemies, making the smoke bombs all the more useful. He can even fire tar like sticky glue as well as net grenades to trap his opponents.

Boomstick: He's got a laser that can cut through an armored car in seconds and an EMP that can take out a moblie weather controlling fortress.

Wiz: Not only that, but his cape is also sharp, making it a useful weapon too. He possesses knock-out gas grenades, exploading foam, and acid that can cut through thick metal in seconds.

(*Cues: Gotham City - Mortal Kombat VS DC Universe*)

Boomstick: With so much gadgets and weapons, Bats has proven to be one of the greatest crime fighters ever. He's strong enough to kick a conctete pillar in half, the force of which would have to be 800 tons of force.

Wiz: He's able to break out of being frozen and when he was poisoned, he could still hit with enough force to shatter reinforced glass designed to withstand a bazooka. As bazookas are designed to be anti-tank weapons, this means they can explode with a force greater than that of 63,000 PSI.

Boomstick: He's also super fast. He's so fast that bullets go in slow-mo. He was able to disappear from the perspective of a woman, putting him at 9,000 miles per hour.

Wiz: Not only that, he can move so fast that Nightwing can't tag him. Nightwing is fast enough to grab a gun so fast the guy holding it didn't see it coming.

Boomstick: Even without his armor, he's tough enough to take a hit from Clayface, who can shatter concrete. His armor can take seven hits from a sniper rifle to the chest without damage, and he's even survived an explosion that took out a small building.

Wiz: But Batman is most famous for his skill. He's managed to intercept a flipped coin with a Batarang, break into a Justice League facility, and he's even disarmed a criminal with a mere coin.

Boomstick: What? He did that? Two-Face could learn a thing or two from this guy. But's he's not just a good marksman. He once figured out that a guy didn't have a tongue by looking at the way his jaw bounced off his punched.

Wiz: Batman also has several notable victories against many people. He's defeated Green Arrow in combat, and he's managed to survive on an island for a long period of time.

Boomstick: He's even battled Deathstroke. And while he lost, Slade mentions that his wounds won't heal for days.

Wiz: He's even defeated a Venom-enhanced Killer Croc in battle and he's even defeated 50 Man-Bat ninjas while crippling 30 of them.

Boomstick: Wait, what? Man-Bat ninjas? Wiz, you gotta do that for me!

Wiz: Never in my life. But while Batman is incredibly skilled, he's also still human, meaning he's not exactly the strongest fighter in the DC Universe.

Boomstick: And many of his greatest feats have required prep time. Like fighting Superman and the Justice League.

Wiz: But regarless, while he's still human, this is the same man who can stare gods in the eye and show no fear.

Batman: No. You are not my father. I am not a disgrace. I am vengeance. I am the night. I am Batman!

Pre-Death Battle[]

Wiz: Alright. The combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.

Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTTTTTTTTTLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Death Battle[]

(*Cues: Suite Part 1 - Gargoyles*)

Batman was standing on a building next to a gargoyle.

Alfred: Master Bruce, may I ask why are you on patrol? Hardly anyone in your rogues gallery has shown up.

Batman: I've heard stories about a winged creature coming out at night, so I'm gonna be on patrol earlier.

Alfred: Is it Man-Bat?

Batman: It's not. It's someone lese. I don't know much about him. All I know is that he only comes out at night.

Batman turned off his communication device. Nighttime started to loom in, causing the statue next to him to start cracking. Goliath had emerged and turned around to see Batman, who jumped back.

Goliath: You are trespassing.

Batman: You! You must be the winged creature going out at night. I'm putting an end to this.

Fight!

(*Cues: Call Him Off - Batman: Arkham City*)

Batman threw a Batarang at Goliath which connected with his head, knocking him back a little. Goliath lunged towards Batman with his claws out. Batman punched Goliath with an uppercut before he could hit, knocking him up and slamming him to the ground. Batman ran towards Goliath and started punching him and then threw him off the building and Batman jumped down.

Batman used a Grappling Hook and tied up Goliath. He then reeled Goliath over to him and started beating him up. He noticed they were about to land so Bats got on top of him and used him as a cushion and then got off. Goliath got up, tore off the roping, grabbed a manhole cover, and threw it at Bats. Bats dodged and fired a laser at Goliath's arm, which started to hurt.

Goliath jumped up and attempted to slash Batman, but he used his smoke pellet to escape. Goliath started slashing all the gas away, but he couldn't see Batman. Batman was standing on a lamppost. Batman leaped from the lamppost onto Goliath and body slammed him. Goliath shook Batman off him, knocking him to the floor. Batman got up and threw pellets of tar at Goliath's body, slowing him down.

Batman kicked Goliath far into a car, causing it to crash. Goliath got up, tore off the tar, and jumped towards Batman. Batman uppercut Goliath up, got out his Grappling Hook, tied Goliath's legs, and brought him down. Batman started to wave Goliath until he threw him into a building wall. Goliath fell, tore the rope, and got up.

Batman started throwing Batarangs at him, but Goliath caught all of them and threw them back. Batman dodged all of them, grabbed one, put it away, and fired a smoke bomb. Goliath started climbing up the wall in order to get to high ground. Batman threw two explosive Batarangs near Goliath which exploded, forcing Goliath to fall.

Batman: When you lunged towards me, I noticed that both times you didn't fly which meant you could fly from ground level. Plus, not a fan of wall-crawlers ever since that fight of mine.

Goliath entered a rage and ran towards Batman. He started clawing at Batman more brutally and viciously, but Batman still dodged. As Goliath was about to slash, Batman caught his arm and threw him over his head and started back-flipping to gain distance. Batman got out the Batarang he put away while Goliath had a claw ready. They jumped towards each other and slashed.

Batman started to groan out of pain for a while. Goliath stood there, until his chest was cut open. When he turned around, he saw his opponent gone. Goliath then fell to the floor, lifeless.

K.O!

Post-Death Battle[]

(*Cues: Gotham City (Album City) - Injustice: Gods Among Us*)

Boomstick: Guess the Manhattan Clan is gonna need a new leader.

Wiz: Goliath was certainly powerful, capable of giving plenty of other foes a hard time, but Batman is just not one of them.

Boomstick: When it came to strength, Bats had the edge. Sure, Goliath can shatter solid ice, but like we said before, that's only 233 tons. Not even close to 800 tons.

Wiz: As for speed, while Goliath can dodge gunfire, Batman has managed to go faster than eyesigtht, putting him at speeds over 5 times faster than Goliath.

Boomstick: And thanks to his many weapons, Batman could easily adapt to the fight unlike Goliath's limited options.

Wiz: But what truly gave Batman the win was his superior skill and experience.

Boomstick: Goliath is skilled, but he's never fought anyone as good as fighting as Batman. In contrast, Batman is known to constantly fight winged beasts like Man-Bat all the time, even fighting 50 ninja versions of him.

Wiz: And Batman's incredible detective skills would certainly help him realize that Goliath can't fly from ground level.

Boomstick: If Bats can tell you don't have a tongue just by the way your jaw bounces off his fist, he can clearly tell Goliath's downside. And besides, while Goliath is able to lead a clan of creatures who are his same species, Batman can lead an entire group of different people with different powers and weaknesses.

Wiz: In short, Batman's superior strength, untrackable speed, and unrealistic skill proved too much for this gargoyle.

Boomstick: No matter what color you paint it, Bruce was the true "Goliath" in this fight.

Wiz: The winner is Batman.

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