Summary[]
These two Wizards have failed to capture or kill their respective foes countless times
However, the task of finishing what they started won't let them stray from their true objective
Gargamel The Great of Smurfs vs Merasmus The Magician of Team fortress 2
Shall Merasmus claim the great book of spell from Evil Wizard or will Gargamel obtain the bombanomicon to capture the smurf's once and for all
Description[]
Wiz: Magic, a source of power only mastered with wisdom , technique and overall professionalism
Boomstick: But these two wizards aren't really professionals to say however when they get serious oh man you better stay away from these master of magic.
Wiz: Gargamel the Great, The Smurf's Worst Nightmare
Boomstick: And Merasmus the Magician, The immortal Wizard,
Wiz: For this case, We will try to composite both character to know what they have at their most powerful
Boomstick: He's wiz and I'm Boomstick
Wiz: It's our job to analyze their Weapons, Armor and Skills to find out who will win a Death battle.
Gargamel Enters the world of Death Battle[]
Wiz: Normally when you think of woods you'll find just trees, birds and the occasional rivers, however if you enter a particular woods you can find something special.
Boomstick: Yeah like an ENTIRE VILLAGE OF TINY BLUE MEN LIVING IN MUSHROOMS!
Wiz: Those are the Smurfs with a height of 3 apples high and a massive men population and each one has one specific personality trait and only a few female population these magical creatures live in secret and with a magical barrier that keeps them hidden made by the Leader of the Smurfs Papa Smurf and only Smurfs can only enter.
Boomstick: I think i found some of those in my yard
Wiz: no no those were some of my failed experiments to recreate them
Boomstick: why are you trying to create smurfs
Wiz: Nothing just for fun
Boomstick: reeeeeeally?
Wiz: "sigh" fine i was planning to study their biology and do some experimenting
Boomstick: Hey let me join in the experimentation of these smurfs
Wiz: No
Boomstick: Aw ok, anyway these little blue men travel by storks have there own economy and own language but just with smurfs... hehehe i think they might be innuendoes in the right circumstances
Wiz: boomstick what is wrong with you?
Boomstick: What how else you think they procreate?! anyway and all together they can able to travel thousands of kilometers carrying heavy stone and wood, hey wiz why is one of them is not like the others ?
Wiz: That is Smurfette unlike the others she was not made by the smurfs however by their Greatest foe, Gargamel the Great
Gargamel: I am not obsessed with Smurfs, thank you. I simply can't stop thinking about the miserable beasts every single minute of every single day!
Boomstick: Gargamel is a wizard that despises the smurfs and lives in a tower practicing magic along side his pet cat Azrael ok that sounds really badass.
Wiz: Azrael is probably a reference to islam religion of being the Angel of death, anyway he aims to capture the Smurfs, the reason of why he must capture them is a bit inconsistent however they seem to be composited into three things
Boomstick: First of is eat them Gross, second is to destroy them and third is to make them into gold,
Wiz: The Gold part is referencing to the alchemy, and one of most consistent reason as Smurfs are an ingredient for turning stuff into gold
Boomstick: and he also Despises those little blue men, the backstory is also inconsistent however the main thing is he was exploring the woods and found the smurfs which were an ingredient in turning stuff in gold so he tried to get one, He had one in his grasp and was about to use that smurf but rest of the smurfs rescued that smurf and kicked Gargamel's ass. Wiz the number of times we say smurf BOTH of have to take a shot after this analysis
Wiz: No thanks, On that day Gargamel despised the smurfs and soon turn it into an everlasting quest to find the smurf village and capture them, and he has the skills to do it.
Boomstick: I would to if they had that theme song looping over and over La laa lala laa laaa, People would crack from hearing that over and over again.
(Note: The Movies and games will be also be used for this matchup,(Yes even i am surprised they have games ) )
Boomstick: He can create life like Smurfette and Dufus the Giant, Turn people younger, Using his wand he can lift smurfs with his telekinesis, Can turn anything bigger or small like his cat Azrael or turn someone the into an animal like a duck, fire out Magic blasts to his targets sending them flying and rain skulls from above !
Wiz: He may be more aligned to an alchemist due to him being a practitioner on potions and thanks to that he has various mystical items that can help him in his situations like his Magic Mirror which is can trap foes within its pocket dimension, Able to see where his foes are with the crystal ball, Create Storms and snow with his potions and even travel through time with the Father time's Hourglass. However he prefers to use his wands like the dragon wand which lets him control his magic with ease, with the dragon wand he manage to lift cars with ease and even made a mini tornado that sucks up anything nearby.
Boomstick: even if you destroy the dragon wand he has even a stronger wand called La wanda and La wanda is stated to be way more powerful than the dragon wand!, however their are occasions where he has used magic with his bare hands before like able to cast magical fire and can manipulate his body with magic, though they require Smurf essence which boosts his magical abilities even further and he keeps some supply within his ring for good measure.
Wiz: Gargamel also has the Great book of spells, filled to the brim with odd spells like bigger houses and invisible smurf catcher, Even a water charmeleon which is basically a commendable pile of water hand .
Boomstick: And that book of spells he has quite a dick personality trolling Gargamel into tearing his own graduation wizard hat FOR A PLAN THAT DID NOT EVEN WORK Bastard!
Wiz: He may have those spells and mystical items but dealing with the smurfs is really a tough task
Boomstick: Gargamel has taken the bunch of punishment during his ever lasting fight with the smurfs, He has endure falls from treetops, tanked a full on garbage truck and cars slamming onto him, getting smacked by a Giant log when he entered the smurf village, tanking a lightning bolt onto his ass , being launched into a building slamming into the twin bell multiple times and then getting bitten Right on his ass and even after that procced to be launched into a tower soon tanked being blown up by Fireworks!
Wiz: and using our calculations W is yield in tons of TNT, R is Radius in meters, and P is Pressure of the shockwave in bars, the standard overpressure is 20 psi or 1.37895 bars. W = 27.860000000000003^3((27136P+8649)^(1/2)/13568-93/13568)^2 = 1.086385603485644654 Tons of TNT which is Building level
Boomstick: man he can take a of beating, I wonder why he can't able to catch those little blue annoying smurfs even after all that?.
Wiz: Things for Gargamel don't really go his way, Majority of his plans are either stopped by papa smurf, Outside influence or his own incompetence
Boomstick: Yeah Gargamel doesn't really have the best track record when it comes to successful plans, all his plans near succeeding ending the Smurfs but always something messes up his plans like Smurfs countering his plans or his own incompetence or greed on the Smurfs.
Wiz: Indeed, almost feel bad for the guy even his family members who are master wizards, witches and alchemist deemed him a disappointment.
Boomstick: However Gargamel does not let his failures and disappointments affect him as he continues to this day to find a way to capture those smurfs.
Wiz: If you ever hear a voice of an old man within the deep forest, You better be prepared to face the dark wizard that haunts the Smurfs, Smurfs Beware of Gargamel.
Gargamel : I am but a simple wizard with a simple desire: limitless power and world adulation! So why does it have to be so hard?
Merasmus COMES for Death Battle[]
Boomstick: Ok Wiz now its my turn to be the lead of this analysis
Wiz: Alright fine, since you won the Flipwart game i guess you can lead this one.
Boomstick: Yes!, Long ago around the 1850's a Company owner named Zephaniah Mann bought a land where his sons Redmond and Blutarch Mann convince him of doing. However when they arrive it was just nothing but a wasteland and deserts fucking idiots and here's another thing that happened while they were there, Zephaniah caught Every last disease Known to MANKIND!, damn talk about the worst day of your life.
Wiz: there's more than that Boomstick, on his death bed he wrote his will on a piece of his skin due to said diseases, to his sons he gave them that particular piece of land they had bought, which means they have to share that same land.
Boomstick: and funny enough the mann brothers Hated each other and to his Bodyguard he gave him the his company aka Mann Co. damn that's like saying F U to your sons for being failures and giving them the biggest karma they ever have.
Wiz: Years pass since that day both Mann brothers decided coincidently to hire Nine mercenaries to try to kill each other, i'm more surprised that both of them thought of the same idea to kill each other.
Boomstick: This in turn made a everlasting stalemate lasting for Generations!, Boomstick you ask ''how can those two last for multiple generations?'', maybe its a magical element of Australium! which grants whoever uses it life expanding gifts and even made a dumb australian into one of the smartest people on the planet at the time!
Wiz: you are taking advantage of this are you
Boomstick: Yes I am wiz, yes I am
Wiz: Anyway in the current batch of mercenaries is the nine classes we see today
Boomstick: The Speedy Scout, The Patriotic Soldier!, The Demonic Pyro , The Texan mechanic Engineer , The Explosive expert Demoman , The Strong Heavy, The Insane Medic, The Cold hearted Sniper and the Sneaky French Spy!. However we are Not going to talk about them instead we are going to talk about one of their adversaries.
Wiz: On every Halloween they faced on of their most impressive foe, The Magician himself Merasmus
Merasmus: Merasmus the Wizard HAS COME FOR YOUR SOULS!
Boomstick: Merasmus is a powerhouse due to him being the only one in his own universe to be Master of magic, Kinda awkward to be the only wizard in a world where Guns are more useful.
Wiz: This wizard has some impressive magical abilities like being able to fly, fire out green magic blasts that knock you into the air, Teleportation, Regeneration and even send out magical fire to his opponents.
Boomstick: Not only that he can able to move object with his mind with his telekinesis but that just scratching the surfacing of what merasmus can do. He has sent the Team fortress 2 mercenaries back in time to the medieval Ages, can create objects out of nowhere, turn disguise himself as an ordinary object and even Summon creatures like ghosts and skeletons and even Monsters like the Monoculus One of Demoman's Haunted Eye! and even Headless Horseless Headsman.
Wiz: which is the ghost of Zephaniah's Brother
Boomstick: hey wiz dare you to say that 5 times fast
Wiz: don't push your luck boomstick
Boomstick: Fine, Merasmus can do absurd stuff too like turn your bodies tiny or turn your head Giant!, remove gravity all together, Make it rain piss, Make you bleed instantly, Make you dance under his will, Grant Ubercharge for Invunerability and Critical hits which are basically Damage buffs and he even manifest into his Spiritual Ghost Form and can still fight in that form. Not to mention he is the owner of an evil amusement park to appease the evil circus God Bonzo which kind quite professional, good for him.
Wiz: The Attractions there are quite strange like a Giant Strongman which anyone is too big to lift, Falling platforms and even has games using Bumper cars like Falling platforms, playing soccer with bumper cars and even collecting Magic rubber ducks.
"Wiz shows a crate with Bonus duck as Boomstick steals it and runs off with it"
Wiz: Hey!
Boomstick: BONUS DUCKS, My DUCKS hahahahaha!!!
Wiz: "sighs"With all these powers he certainly match for Mercenaries which is impressive since all of them have their own impressive feat.
Boomstick: The Strongest of them heavy Took down an Adult Russian Bear with his bare hands in the middle is winter!, Punched a spy into the ground strong enough to bury the sneaky frenchman, easily punched all the blood out of scout and Stopped a full throttle train Filled with explosives mind you using HIS BARE HANDS, Yes i know were using the end of the line video but it was made into an update in the game so fuck it were counting it as canon, yes we know he was Ubercharged at the moment however the Ubercharge faded during the duration of the train crash.
Wiz: By using the calculations, The main locomotive should weigh about 210 tons while each freight car weighs 30 tons with an additional 100 tons assuming they are all loaded leading to a total of at least 730 tons or 662245 kilograms and the speed of those type of trains are usually around 80 miles per hour or 35.8 m/s and using this equation Joules = Weight (kg) * speed (m/s)^2 it should put at around at the very least 847015642.533 Joules of energy or 0.2024 Tons of TNT just enough to destroy a small building!
Boomstick: He can keep up with scout who can dodge bullets and even Lasers from Soldier's Cow Mangler Giving him near light speed reaction speeds, heck he could even dodge it himself since Merasmus and soldier keep fighting each other and soldier is so strong that his punch a snap a guy's neck and launch him to the other side of the room and even neck snap bears.
Wiz: Merasmus is also really tough since he tanked soldier's rockets and Pyro's Flamethrowers which can destroy Buildings, Destroyed Engineer's Sentries which can kill foes as tough as the Heavy.
Boomstick: Speaking of Which Ole Merasmus has some history with some of the mercenaries mainly Demoman and Soldier. For the soldier he was his old roommate they did not got along and soon Merasmus Kicked soldier out of his castle, however Soldier already made his castle into a raccoon sanctuary, Damn talk about a pest problem. Luckily he moved in with a celebrity Tom Jones, which soldier killed with a neck snap, yikes poor guy just want to have a normal roommate without anyone ruining it.
Wiz: As for the Demoman, he met the wizard at a young age when he was working for The Wizard to find a job and he was task to clean his library, which did not turn out well because The young demoman opened a forbidden book that stole his eye and haunted it and Merasmus witnessed the event so he took upon himself to minimized the damage and saved him though that experience scarred tavish leaving his eye missing and incurable, Even medic can't heal who's medigun can heal all wounds within seconds. However that's no ordinary forbidden book the young Scot opened, That is most powerful item in his arsenal The Bombinomicon.
Boomstick: The Bombinomicon is a powerful book that summons as the name suggests LITTERAL BOMBS! and another bomb themed ability is to make the target's head into a bomb kind sounds like Overkill and it is, In gameplay your head goes back to normal but i think thats for balance, I'm pretty sure its game over if a literal bomb is your head if it explodes and oh yeah he likes to talk to people, and blowing things up and putting on curses kind nice guy to be honest if he weren't a cursed book. Even if you manage to kill the damned wizard, He comes back way stronger cause of those "Kill me Come back Stronger Pills" though soldier did finish all of it but we can assume merasmus still can do that, Also Who the fuck made those pills and where do I buy it!
Wiz: and not to mention he is an immortal Wizard who lived 6000 years which I'm surprised his memory span is that long
Boomstick: Some say he was alive during the Sumerian Civilization and he also became a brewer of potions in a Scottish Drug company during 1861, My favorite is his "Wizard's Brew" Hat Tonic during 1861.
"Boomstick shows the hat tonic"
Wiz: how did you even get that?
Boomstick: oh I know a guy who give me these stuff, there quite effect wiz you should give it a try.
Wiz: Uh no thanks, anyway for a master magician you think he might have down sides and he does.
Boomstick: He has crippling debt to the Japanese and Russian Mafia's damn he would have balls of steel to mess with those guys.
Wiz: I'm more surprised he has that type of connections and the his biggest and only regret of this 6000 year old wizard he has ever made is being Soldier's Roommate, That i could relate with a retain redneck.
Boomstick: HEY!
Wiz: not to mention he likes to toy with his enemies, He literally plays with hide and seek with the mercenaries who is trying to kill him.
Boomstick: However, He may fail over and over again killing the mercenaries and seem friendly at first, When you see a green aura through Halloween night you better be prepared to face Merasmus The Magician for he will come for your soul.
Meraismus: Enjoy Halloween mortals, for it will be your last!
Pre-Fight[]
Wiz: Alright the Combatants are set! We've run the data for all possibilities
Boomstick: Its time for a DEATH BATTLE!
FIGHT![]
Part 1: Magical Meeting[]
"Location: Carnival of Carnage"
It is dark Halloween night in the evil amusement park, as the place is filled with the sounds of ghosts howling into the night, bats take flight into the night sky and circus music through the old speakers, a dark robed old man carrying a bag filled with potions and a book along with his cat enters the spooky attraction silently. The Orange cat meows angerly of why they are in the amusement park as the pass a torch reveals to be Gargamel and Azrael
Gargamel: So see Azrael, this amusement park holds a Magical book called the Bombinomicon, it holds the spells powerful enough to destroy the smurfs, once i find it in this place the smurfs will finally meet their demise Hahahahaha!
???: Fooool who dares seeks out the forbidden book! The Bombinomicon.
The Robed Wizard is surprised by the sudden voice within the supposedly abandoned amusement park as his cat jumps onto his leg out of fright
Gargamel: Who goes there?! Who dares to confront the great and powerful Gargamel!, Azrael get off my leg!
An ominous green flash of light appears infront of the robed wizard, Gargamel soon came face to face with a Magician with a skull for a hat as he reacts to be surprised of his appearance as his cat gets off his master and hisses at the floating magician.
Merasmus: I am Merasmus and I must inform you that the possession of that magical book's power is far to great for a mortal like you to handle.
Gargamel: I don't care what it will take wizard!, i want that magic book, tell me where it is hidden wizard!
Merasmus: I must you ask you to leave this place, I shall soon have guests over and merasmus wishes to be prepared at full strength for his guests.
As floating wizard Gargamel holds up his dragon wand and points it at the floating wizard
Gargamel: I'll be taking that book! either by telling me the location of it or it by FORCE!
The Floating wizard get caught of guard and surprised of the sudden change of tone of his opponent, he soon arms himself with his staff preparing to fight his mystical adversary
Merasmus: Fine lets this quick, you'll regret challenging a magician!
FIGHT!
Part 2: Magic duel[]
Gargamel fires of a blue mystical blast from his dragon wand trying to ensnare the floating wizard to his control however Merasmus sees the blue attack as he fires a green magic blast from his staff to reflect the robed wizard's attack. Gargamel continues to try again and again keeping the immortal wizard occupied with of reflecting his blue mystical blasts with his own green magic as Gargamel's cat pounces onto merasmus and distracts Merasmus from the duel
Merasmus: Agh! Get off me you stray cat
Gargamel: Good Azrael! Now take this!
As Merasmus is distract by Azrael, Gargamel fires of a power magic blast towards Merasmus launching him away, The Immortal wizard manage to toss the cat away and saw the incoming blue attack but was unable to react to it
Merasmus: What the?
Merasmus gets launched back by the blue magic attack onto the opposite side of the amusement park, as Merasmus lands he sees multiple crates and uses his magic to launch the crates toward the cat owner.
Gargamel: oh no
Gargamel dodges a few crates however he trips from his cloak and a crate lands onto his head breaking the box on impact.
Gargamel: Oh I am going to feel that in the morning owie..
Gargamel stand back up and points his wand at incoming crates using his own magic to redirect the crates back at the immortal wizard, Merasmus easily dodges it and soon turns into them throwing items back and forth to each other found in the amusement park like torches, crates, pumpkin bombs and pieces of large wood at each other, Azrael runs towards soldier's roommate to do in chip damage to help out his master however merasmus sees the cat coming towards him and knocks away the orange cat away using his staff sending the cat away from him gargamel sees this and this angers him
Gargamel: Azrael! you'll pay for that wizard!
The cat owner uses his magic to lift a giant boulder and throws it at the distracted wizard though merasmus sees the boulder and fires a powerful fire blast at the boulder turning it too dust.
Merasmus: Basbus Brontu!
Merasmus charges towards gargamel who is coughing cause of the dust made from thE boulder and merasmus does a powerful strike to the stunned potion maker to the side with his staff.
Merasmus: Mortis Longdistimus!
As he chants to fires a green energy blast at cat owner, however gargamel lands on his butt and sees the attack and fires his own magic attack making the blue and green magic clash, Merasmus charges again towards gargamel charging up his staff with green energy however gargamel took in his bag to see his magic mirror still intact before the immortal wizard reached gargamel, the smurf slayer brought out the magic mirror trapping merasmus temporarily within its pocket dimension, Gargamel goes after his cat to check on him
Gargamel: Azrael are you ok?
Azrael nods as he meows towards his master
Gargamel: That wont hold him for long we must make haste in preparations to face him quickly
"Location: Magic Mirror"
As Gargamel and azrael prepare to face the wizard with a plan Meanwhile within the magic mirror Merasmus explores the magic mirror's realm, he's confused of his current location.
Merasmus: What the? Where am i? hmm it Merasmus appear to be inside the mirror No matter this will not stop merasmus for killing those two who want the bombinomicon.
Merasmus goes to the mirror and tries to ram his way out but fails
Merasmus: What?!, Merasmus will not be stopped by a mere mirror, Staffus Attackum!
Merasmus strikes the mirror with his staff multiple times until the he charge up his staff with green magic
Merasmus: Let Merasmus OUT!
Merasmus strikes the mirror with a powerful magic strike with his staff breaking the mirror and freeing himself from the pocket dimension.
"Location: Carnival of Carnage"
Merasmus: Merasmus the Wizard has come for your souls!, ok now where is that wizard?
Merasmus looks around and he can't see the the cat owner however he does notice that his amusement park has a storm and soon he was suddenly met by a giant and a water hand as the giant lands a slam onto the wizard and the water hand grabs the downed wizard squeezing him as lightning from the storm strikes merasmus leaving the wizard up in smoke then the water hand slams him into teh ground and the giant and water hand start to slam onto the Smokey wizard, soon Gargamel along Azrael reveals himself hiding in the wooden structure.
Gargamel: Excellent work boys, soon once we get that book from this wizard we can get those Smurfs
Gargamel looks at the giant
Giant: Will daddy give me reward?
Gargamel: Don't worry Daddy will give you the reward
Giant: Yay!
As the giant and the water hand are pounding onto merasmus, the immortal wizard had enough with the one sided beat and and unleashes a powerful magic launching using his ghost form all of gargamel creations back as the ghost of merasmus goes back into its body and floats angered and glowing with green magic.
Merasmus: ENOUGH! This seems to be unfair fight so Merasmus shall even the playing field, I summon you Monoculus, Headless Horseless Headsman and the Ghouls of My Carnival !
Merasmus summons a portal and it reveals to be a Giant Floating Eyeball, A Giant Man with a pumpkin for a head with an haunted axe and Various ghosts and spirits, As Gargamel sees what's happening he can only say on thing at the moment.
Gargamel: Oh smurf
Part 3: The Scream Fortress trio vs The army of Gargamel![]
The Giant charges towards the undead warrior to protect his creator and as Gargamel points his wand at the water chameleon which turn the hand giant, The Giant Water hand immediately charges towards the monoculus, Merasmus fires a barrage of green fire towards gargamel which the Old wizard fires his own blue fire blasts from his wand to block the attack, He points his wand to his head and Chants
Gargamel: Alaka- Zanimal!
Which turns the wizard bigger into a giant, he does the same to his cat azrael which is currently attack ghosts that taunt him, Merasmus is surprised by the sudden transformation of gargamel
Merasmus: Merasmus did not expect that, well played
Gargamel rips away the giant hammer from the strongmann
Gargamel: hahaha come to Papa
Gargamel laughs as he whacks merasmus with the giant hammer launching the Immortal wizard away, Merasmus is stunned a bit however he shakes it off easily
Merasmus: Bontu Barsoma
He chants as he raises his staff as he uses his magic as his green aura surrounds him turning him giant and charges towards gargamel causing them to clash staff to hammer. Both armies fight each other as the Gargamel's giant and the HHH are having a mighty brawl which shakes the ground, the HHH swings his axe for the giant to block with his arm and lands a punch on the Horseman's Head which the horsemann pushes back the Giant stunning the giant soon screams which stuns the giant and charges towards the giant, the water chameleon phase through the rocket of haunted eye which grabs the Monoculus with the attempt to squeeze it to death, the monoculus get angry and fires its rockets everywhere from its eye causing collateral damage to the area and to the surrounding beings near it including the water hand which gets knocked back , its one of powerful rockets hits the giant which stuns it however the giant recovers quite easily due to its bulk and grabs hold of the charging undead horsemann attempting to squeeze it like the water hand. Meanwhile with giant azrael is attacking the ghouls and spirits even though it does not do much since his attack phase through the ethereal bodies, The cat hisses at the ghosts as the ghosts and spirits scares the cat. Back to the the wizard fight with Merasmus and Gargamel both are clashing their wooden weapons but merasmus enhanced his staff with magic and swings it towards the hammer wielding gargamel which launches him back into a wooden structure soon Gargamel throws his hammer towards merasmus but it missed,
Merasmus: Fool you missed!
Gargamel slams his wand to cause the sky to crackle in thunder as it rain skulls hitting his foes.
Merasmus: Skulls?! Really? ok ok i know its Halloween and all but this is a bit too much don't cha think?
As merasmus was distracted the Jewish wizard fires blue beam at the thrown hammer to control it using his magic wand and he whacks merasmus in the head with the flying hammer, Merasmus now faces a flying hammer that is controlled by Gargamel, Merasmus goes blow for blow onto the flying hammer with his staff and holds it back clashing with it using one arm and uses his free arm to fire a powerful fire blast at gargamel but The Giant sees his his creator is in trouble so he throws away the HHH to azrael with the cat attacks on the head of the HHH and runs towards his creator and he reached his creator just in time tanking the fire ball.
Giant: Mean wizard won't hurt DADDY!
Gargamel: Good job my giant!
Merasmus casts using his free hand to fire magic to the sky making it rain jars of yellow substances crashing down splashing the odd liquid around the area causing gargamel's party in confusion
Merasmus: RAIN OF JARATE!
Gargamel: What is this jarate substance wizard?!
Some of it golden liquid went onto gargamel's cloak and the robed wizard sniffs it and realizes of what the substance is
Gargamel: Wait a minute don't tell this is what i think it is
Merasmus: Merasmus is not proud of that spell
Gargamel realizes that the substance is Urine aka PISS
Gargamel: Ew! i am going to need a shower after this magical duel NOW TAKE THIS!
As Gargamel continue The HHH holds his axe with his right hand and he uses his left to toss azrael of his face and azrael lands and he tries to lick off the scent of piss on his fur and charges towards the giant and slashes the giants head off with blinding speed with his haunted axe.
Gargamel: NO MY GIANT!
Gargamel screams as he looks at the dead body of the giant and as he look at remaining summoned ally the water chameleon being sucked into a portal which the monoculus has summoned sending it to the underworld to evaporate.
Gargamel: NOT MY WATER CHAMELEON! I wasted my dignity for that!
As gargamel releases his control over the hammer and kneels to mourn his fallen creations, The giant Azrael goes to gargamel to protect him.
Gargamel: you.. YOU KILLED MY BEAUTIFUL CREATIONS! You all will know the power of the GREAT AND POWERFUL GARGAMEL
Gargamel twirls his wand to the sky and using his magic creates a mini tornado sucking in the skulls, jars of piss and soon the meramus' allies.
Merasmus: Runs fools! Run from that tornado!
As merasmus tries to warn his allies but the monoculus tries to teleport away but he get sucked into the skull and piss filled magic vortex of Gargamel and as for the brother of zephaniah tries to run away from the vortex but trips and uses his axe as an anchor to not get sucked in but lets go cause of the strong suction of the miniature tornado causing both demoman's lost eye and the Headless horseless headsmann to get ripped to shreds from the debris, skulls and piss.
Gargamel: Yaaaaaagh!
Gargamel points his wand towards launches everything his tornado sucked up into merasmus causing a big gust of dust and wind covering the area, Gargamel looks at his dragon wand and it shows that its out of juice and keep it in his robe causing gargamel and azrael to shrink back to there normal sizes.
Gargamel: It lasted longer than i thought it would, hopefully its enough to beat the wizard
Azrael goes to his master and meows in a tone that he is stinks.
Gargamel: well you also smell, we'll take a bath once we defeat this wizard alright
Gargamel and his cat looks toward his opponents direction seeing if the immortal foe is still standing as the dust settle it shows a red glow coming from the dust and reveals to be merasmus and his body glowing an redish hue as Gargamel step back in fear.
Gargamel: Impossible, No one can survive that!
Merasmus: I am no mere man, I had enough with you! I shall send you back in time so you can't bother Merasmus ANYMORE
Merasmus charges his staff with green energy to prepare to send gargamel to the dark ages but gargamel grabs something in his bag and reveals to be a hourglass.
Gargamel: Not if I bring you with me!, thank goodness i stole this hourglass from father time
Meanwhile with father time sneezes from the mention of father time
Father time: huh i wonder that's about, wait where's by time hourglass?
Gargamel uses the hourglass to fire a time beam at the same time merasmus fire his time travel spell at gargamel making those two beams clash and soon a bright light flashes before there eyes unknowing when they are going.
Part 4: Time is not on your side![]
"Location: Gargamel's Castle"
As the Light fades both combatants see a medieval castle in the middle forest as the Merasmus sizes goes back to normal and his ubercharge fades Gargamel and azrael recognizes his castle which azrael runs inside to hide from the
Gargamel: Ah home sweet hom- HEY!
Merasmus fires a magic blast knocking away the magic hourglass from Gargamel, which gave merasmus an opportunity to to retreat temporarily into the forest
Merasmus: Merasmus must regain his strength, when has merasmus landed?
Gargamel noticed merasmus has been weakened and plans to corner him somewhere recognizable
Gargamel: Azrael quickly before he regains his strength we must corner that blasted wizard, luckily we have a spell for that
Gargamel grabs a book with a blue gem within its book and sets it down as he chants
Gargamel: O Great Book Of Spells, upon whose pages dwell secrets that no one tells...awake for Gargamel!
The Magic book opens itself for the cunning wizard and asks
Books of spells: What is it that you wish, you traitorous lich
Azrael laughs at gargamel for making the great of book of spells jealous
Gargamel: Oh come on, i am not going to replace you oh great book of spells, i still have plenty of use of you and your mystical magic that is well
Books of spell: Very well what spell you require oh great gargamel
Gargamel: I require a home that is so large and big to send the wizard
Books of spells: Very well ,you must Draw this diamond in the dust, munch on bread with moldy crust, stand on your ear loaves perfectly still, to get your dream house repeat if you will: second mortgage, big foreclosure, low down payment, high embrasure.
Gargamel along with azrael follows the instructions regrettably and summons a giant version of his home nearby Merasmus, As merasmus wondering through the woods he sees various creatures like dragons, squirrels and even some glimpses of little blue people. However he spots the giant version of gargamel's castle and enters it to rest
"Location: Giant Gargamel's Castle"
Merasmus: This castle shall do
Merasmus uses his staff and uses his magic to cast multiple objects around the house and teleports himself into a random room and turns into a random object hiding in plain sight.
Gargamel walks towards the giant version of his home and enters the castle and sees plenty of items which are not usually in his own.
Gargamel: what the?
The Smurf slayer is confused at the moment however Merasmus using his magic taunts gargamel
Merasmus: Fool welcome to your doom!
Gargamel: Where are you blasted wizard
Merasmus: I am here at the same time NOWHERE, feel the terror of my hiding!
Gargamel hits some of the new items around the giant castle and azrael sniffs around the castle to find merasmus but both failed to find the hiding magician as merasmus taunts them.
Merasmus: You are getting colder and colder hahahahaha! The longer i hide THE STRONGER I BECOME!
Gargamel get an idea and opens his backpack and grabs a crystal ball to find
Gargamel: This will help find that wizard, crystal ball clear and true, give us the location of the foe even a clue
Merasmus: wait wait Don't do that!
The crystal ball shows merasmus as a bookshelf in the upper floor and gargamel sneakily goes up the stairs and sees the bookshelf and grabs within his robe La Wanda a wand larger than the dragon wand and much more powerful, He blasts the bookshelf's disguised merasmus with a powerful blue magic projectile knocking Merasmus out of his disguise disrupting his healing and launching into a wall. Merasmus fires a continuously beam of green fire from his staff but gargamel retaliates with his own beam of magic from la wanda causing both beam to clash making a beam struggle and the room lit with blue and green magic.
Merasmus: You will never beat my Magic!!!
Gargamel: Alakazaaaaaaaaam!!
Gargamel unleashes a full power blast pushing back merasmus' magic even pushing back himself just to kill the immortal wizard, the blue beam pushes back azrael watches the beam struggle and soon Gargamel does a final push of his wand give him the edge and overpowering the Immortal wizard and causing a massive explosion even seen from the outside, Gargamel gets launched back from the explosion and falls to the floor and as the dust settle the magician seems to be gone however a portal is in it place.
Gargamel: a.. a Portal... Come azrael
Gargamel along with azrael goes through the portal unknowing where they will end up
Part 5: Mystical MADNESS![]
"Location: Skull Island"
Gargamel and azrael arrives on a island with a giant skull in the middle and they see a book within a cage.
Gargamel: Ah i see the forbidden book! Come azrael, we must claim that book!
Azrael rests on the floor and gargamel is annoyed but he goes for the book alone, as he climbs into the skull and faces the Bombinomicon within the cage as the cage lowers away.
Gargamel: At last the bombinomicon soon those those little blue runts will be mine!
As gargamel reaches for the book lightning flashes and has the urge to do a dance and dances to the thriller dance move.
Bombinomicon: Hey what's up guys, also your kind of dancing
Gargamel: i know but i don't why am i dancing, i don't even want to dance right now!
As Gargamel dance the book disappears with a puff of green magic with a face full of disbelief he looks around while dancing, he tries to stop dancing but can't
Bombinomicon: Oh cya.
Gargamel: No! the book! Where did it go and why can't i stop dancing?!
As gargamel is filled with confusion and looking around he hears a familiar voice inside his head
Merasmus: And though you fight to stay alive, your body starts to spasmus....
As a familiar voice taunt the cat owner screams in agony and dread of hearing his opposed to be fallen wizard
Gargamel: No... NOOOO! How can be this possible i saw you die!
Merasmus: No mere mortal can defeat the magic of Merasmus!
Merasmus suddenly appears hovering over the skull of the island almost other worldly aura of green tint on his body holding the bomibinomicon with his right hand at the same time Gargamel stops dancing and clenches his la wanda knowing it does have enough magic for cast projectiles, Gargamel runs outside of the skull and prepares to fire his la wanda at merasmus but Merasmus holding the staff with his left makes Merasmus float making the smurf catcher loose his balance and also his cat floats waving its paws trying to get back on the ground.
Gargamel: What.. WHAT DID YOU DO!
Merasmus: Gravity annoys me, SO I REMOVED IT!
Merasmus fires multiple fire balls at Gargamel as pelting wizard tries to also fire his blue fire balls at Merasmus which both green and blue flames hit each other causing a shockwave for each fire ball colliding. Gargamel uses the last of his la wanda to fire off a giant blast of magic Merasmus teleports behind Gargamel .
Gargamel: Where did he go?
Merasmus: BOO!
Gargamel: AH!
Merasmus whacks gargamel into the ground and holds up bombinomicon commanding it to make it rain bombs across the battle field
Merasmus: Feel the wrath of the BOMBINOMICOOOON!
Bombinomicon: Alright lets do this, Have some bombs guys!
As the book that stole demoman's eye summons the bomb rain, Gargamel and his pet cat gets bombarded with the explosives but gargamel ring glows blue as gargamel lands he drop la wanda which is out of magic and puts out his hands as he uses the remaining smurf essense within his ring absorb the incoming bombs however azrael gets knocked away from the island and into the water.
Gargamel: No Azrael!! I Gargamel won't lose to you YAAAAAA!
As gargamel try to do his best to absorb as much of the bombs as he can, he gets overwhelmed by the bombs and gets hit by the large assault of the raining bombs making the evil wizard fall to the ground and endure to explosive bombardment , Merasmus stops the barrage of bombs so he can see if his opponent still lives however merasmus soon sees an extremely damaged and bloody gargamel on the floor.
Merasmus: You have impressed me mortal, you did want this book right then it is fitting for you to die by it! Bombinomicon!
As Merasmus drops his staff and holds his book high with his two hands, Gargamel stands weakly and using the last of the ring's strength fires a blue fireball at merasmus
Gargamel: I... I'll destroy you Dark wizard !!!
Merasmus get hit by the fireball however its too late as the bombinomicon fires a magic laser that turned gargamel's head into a bomb. Merasmus gets knocked by the fireball and dropped his and gargamel rushes towards the green magician knowing if he will go down, he'll be bring down his foe with him.
Gargamel: AAAAAAAAGH!
Merasmus: Begone!
Merasmus uses his telekinesis to toss gargamel out of blast range and into the vast sea that surrounds the skull island as the bomb flickers green quicker and quicker gargamel had only one thing to say.
Gargamel: sm.. SM...SMUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURFS!
As his last words invoking the name of his hated enemy the bombhead explodes causing an explosion of blood and guts onto the sea ending the life of the Smurf's eternal foe. Merasmus stand and picks up his book and looks into the vast sea where his foe used to be.
Merasmus: You should have never challenged a magician gargamel...
KO!
Alternate Ending[]
As Merasmus arrives above the skull island Gargamel now free of the dancing spell uses the opportunity to turns Merasmus into a duck making the fall before merasmus gets to use the bombinomicon as Azrael sees the Wizard duck he chases merasmus
Merasmus: No get away ! Merasmus wishes not to be eaten!! Get away !
Azrael pounces onto the scared immortal and soon feasts onto his prey biting and tearing the flesh of Merasmus, Merasmus screams in pain in his body which is now a duck squirms as Gargamel's pet devours his foe as gruelling minutes pass azrael is finish with his meal and all that remain of the wizard is bones and a skull hat ending the life of the magician and Soldier's Roommate and next to the corpse is the floor shows the bombinomicon..
Bombinomicon: Damn, you killed the wizard thats pretty cool guys, not even the mercenaries can do that
Gargamel: ah excellent this should take down these smurfs once and for all, Come azrael stop gnawing on his bones we have work to do.
Gargamel picks up the bombinomicon and leaves the area which Azrael catches to him once azrael is finish playing with the bones to of fallen wizard
Post Analysis[]
Boomstick: Ow, My childhood! Talk about an Explosive finale!
Wiz: Both Masters of Magic have a lot of similar spells, survived explosions and even call upon allies who can help them in the battle and gargamel surely had the edge in his versatility with his numerous magical items and spells and Intelligence with his numerous inventions and Merasmus easily takes the Experience edge since he's was alive around 6000 years and not to mention his years of fighting the mercenaries.
Boomstick: But Wiz just experience won't let them win the so what give the Immortal Wizard the win?
Wiz: Lets go off their strengths first, Gargamel can shake fully grown Nut trees and with his telekinesis can lift entire cars which is impressive though Merasmus can scale to the mercenaries who can take down armies of robots which possibly can destroy a town with the invasion of multple areas and certainly on par with soldier who has taken down a horde of robots while ugh ..naked and covered in honey.
Boomstick: Thats real american way to fight wiz! also Heavy the strongest of the mercenaries can stop and survived a train crash!, For reaction speeds we can give gargamel lightning timing since he has reacted to lightning before at least and for Merasmus we can give him Near relativistic speeds with scaling to soldier's Cow Mangler which is a basically a super laser!, Sure gargamel should be capable of dodging light but Merasmus is more consistent with continuously battling soldier you know the guy who has the FUCKING SPACE LASER and as for speed itself Merasmus can freaking teleport! sure Gargamel has his flying machine but i think that's more on transportation rather than combat.
Wiz: Here comes the more complicated stat, There durability they have survived explosions when battling their adversaries as for for Merasmus case demoman's Explosives, Soldier's Rockets and for Gargamel's Case Jokey's Gift Bombs and his failed experiments.
Boomstick: The Best durability feat we got for Gargamel is him surviving the fireworks at the end of Smurfs 2 which is really impressive for a normal guy like him.
Wiz: And he tanked a 1 ton of tnt which is building level slightly just higher than merasmus' scaling to heavy's Train feat
Boomstick: And as for Immortal wizard Merasmus he does not really have much durability feats but we can use the Heavy the tankiest among the mercenaries to scale to Merasmus and Heavy survived the full train crash.
Wiz: And the result is heavy tanking 0.2024 tons of tnt which is small building level however is could be much higher since heavy got back up with much ease for for a high ball around building level
Boomstick: Even though gargamel is atad more durabily, Merasmus has his Bombinomicon which can turn people's heads to a bomb that bypass the durability of the opponent and Kill them instantly!
Wiz: Most of Gargamel's More powerful abilities require prep time like his giants and book of spells with require some to do, also though both have time hopping abilities only one has it on them at all times aka Merasmus and Gargamel require the hourglass to even time travel.
Boomstick: But what about the Magic mirror which can trap foes within its pocket dimension?! you ask but even that will only hold of merasmus for so long cause you can escape that pocket dimension by literally breaking the mirror itself so basically one time use only, however lets give gargamel the benefit of the doubt that he can cast those long spells but even so Merasmus can either heal himself or just come back from the dead and even stronger!, Sure he can summon storms but he can't control it and to summons storms he needs time to do that which merasmus can take advantage off plus he does not have anything that can harm his immortality nor the fact he can't counter Merasmus'" Come back from the dead and get stronger pills", plus his wands and ring need a good supply of smurf juice to continue to work while Merasmus is not restrained to limitations.
Wiz: Gargamel did put up a great fight against the immortal wizard, With his Versatility of mystical items and spells, Durability and impressive Power of great book of spell he could surely give Merasmus a fight.
Boomstick: But Merasmus just was stronger, faster, More experienced and The Power of the Bombinomicon gave this immortal wizard the with win, It looks the Smurfs can live another day cause Gargamel chances of winning just got BOMB!
Wiz: The Winner is Merasmus the Magician
Soundtrack[]
The Great Bombanomicon of Spells!
- Soundtrack will be mostly spooky vibe with some aspect of comedic tones into the mix, the smurfs lalala song and tf2 theme motifs will be fused into a spooky orchestral mix
Trivia[]
-Originally this fight was included Cedric however due to being blacklisted this fight was a compromise with the deletion of cedric of the matchup
- The Firework calc is done by The Irish VS Writer and the Train Calc is done by Professor Mewtwo
- This would be a 3D fight
- The Flipwart game is a reference to the fight Asgore Dreemurr ( Undertale) vs King Andrias ( Amphibia)
- Connections are they both aim to end the life of who ruined their lives ( Soldier and Smurfs), Both have magical Books that can talk ( Bombinomicon and the Great book of Spells ), Usually shown to more comedic side and out right be used for laughs but when they go all out on the magic they are a force not to be messed with.
- also if you disagree with the fight please explain why in the comments, This surprisingly I had of kind fun making cause some of scene i imagined while sleeping on it