(Quick Author's note: Yeah, I'm doing this before I finish my previous battle, but I've really been wanting to do this and doing the other battle is a bit of a chore. I'll get to it at some point but don't expect many updates on the last battle royale at any point. Sorry.)
Gamzee Makara vs. Betty Noire is Jackythejack's 13th death battle, and it serves as their season one finale, pitting Gamzee from the Homestuck webcomic against Betty Noire, from Glitchtale.
Description[]
It's Homestuck versus Glitchtale in this season finale of Death Battle! These mass murderers who strike fear into the hearts of their enemies duke it out to see who's the better. Will Gamzee be turned into dust, or will Betty feel the full force of the Dark Carnival?
Introduction[]
Wiz: Fear, one of the most basic human emotions. To certain extremes, fear can kill a man. It can cause people to freeze in their tracks, and be unable to move.
Boomstick: And there are some characters in fiction that use fear as their main method of attacking, or just happen to make people shit their pants just by being in the area. Kind of like these two creepy ass combatants here.
Wiz: Gamzee Makara; Homestuck's Juggalo, Trollian Bard of Rage.
Boomstick: And Betty Noire, the SOUL of Fear herself. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle!
Gamzee Makara[]
Wiz: The planet of Alternia is without doubt a violent one, filled with giant creatures that are able to kill most of the weaker inhabitants of the planet quite easily, a beheamoth that could kill every living being on that planet with a single word, and sentient inhabitants that essentially go by the rule of Kill or be Killed.
Boomstick: Yeah, Alternia's not the place that you'd wanna go to for the holidays, though, there are some poor unfortunate souls that are stuck living on this planet, but they're not humans like you'd expect them to be.
Wiz: Instead of humans, the planet is occupied by these creatures known as Trolls. Trolls are a nocturnal race, who are naturally violent towards others, and are raised by giant animals that they are given at birth known as Lusus. Trolls also have ranks in society, and the rank is decided by blood.
Boomstick: And rust bloods, or a dark burgundy, are the lowest on the system, and the worst blood type there. Well, unless you have candy red blood like humans, but that's clearly never happened before.
Wiz: Trolls also have special powers depending on the color of their blood. Those lower on the ranking, or the Hemospectrum, have psychic powers, as a Burgundy blood like Aradia Megido can cause things to levitate, and the same can be said for the Yellow blooded Sollux Captor, who can also shoot lasers out of his eyes.
Boomstick: Though while the mind powers and stuff are really cool and all, there's are even cooler powers that await for you if you're higher up on this Hemospectrum, which include mind manipulation, an extended lifespan, and even super strength, if you're reeeeally high up on the spectrum. We're talking purple bloods and fuschia bloods.
Wiz: That is correct, and out of all of the trolls, there is one that's descended from the Grand Highblood , the physically strongest troll who have ever lived, even stronger than their own Emperess, Her Imperious Condescension. Thanks to his lineage, this troll is one of the strongest trolls of his generation, and can easily destroy just about anyone in his path. This troll's name...is Gamzee Makara.
sEe MaN, i Am StRaIgHt Up TeLlInG yOu. MiRaClEs. iT's LiKe, AlRiGhT, cOmPuTeRs, RiGhT? WhAt ThE fUcK? mIrAcLeS iS wHaT.
Boomstick: Wait, that's the one who's the strongest troll, like, ever? That just looks like some dopey clown who can't even type right! Wiz, you're pulling my leg on this, right?
Wiz: I am certainly not pulling your leg on this one, Wiz. You see, even though Gamzee doesn't seem like it, he is defintiely one of the most powerful trolls in the Homestuck universe, but his true nature is hidden behind him constantly being high off of the slime that he sleeps in. And no, I'm not making that up, that's more or less true.
Boomstick: Uh...right, well, even Gamzee's strength couldn't save his planet when he came across a game called SGRUB with his eleven other troll...friends. You see, the moment they opened the game, their planet was threatened with destruction by meteors, and the twleve trolls got out just in time to start a wonderful game of kill literally everything except for your friends...sometimes.
Wiz: While in this game state the players were often left isolated on their own planets, which the game created for them. Well, except for people like Equius , who just jumped up to the portals, which were...more than several stories up. Yeah he does that casually.
Boomstick: Not many people know exactly what happened to Gamzee when he was on his own planet. Well, besides the fact that he totally beat the crap out of just about every enemy there! Though, the one problem is to become god tiered, which is basically godmode for Homestuck, but it didn't seem like he cared much anyways.
Wiz: Despite constant troubles on their way through the game, Gamzee and the eleven other trolls were able to beat the Black King and beat the game...sort of. There were complications, and they ended up jumping onto a giant meteor to another universe. Yes, this happens.
Boomstick: Talk about a high speed ride! Though it sounds like an accident waiting to happen. I mean, where are the breaks on that thing anyways? What were they planning on doing when they got there?
Wiz: Crash, most likely. Though, that's besdies the point. Now that there wasn't any threat of dying, and now that they obtained an egg to spawn new members of their species, it looked like everything was looking up for the remainder of the Trollian race.
Boomstick: And let me guess, everything got fucked up, yeah?
Wiz: That is correct. You see, as there was another member of the eleven trolls, Eridan, who had sort of lost it after being rejected by another member of the group, something dark inside Gamzee had awakened, something that would spell disaster for the rest of the trolls on the meteor. Without any of his slime left to consume, Gamzee...had become Sober.
I AM GOING TO MOTHERFUCKING KILL ALL YOU MOTHERFUCKERS. and paint the wicked pictures with your motherfuckin blood. FROM YOUR VEINS WILL DRIP MY MIRACLES. your crushed bones will make my special stardust. WELCOME TO THE DARK CARNIVAL, BROTHER.
Boomstick: And I'm supposed to be scared because he's sober now? Because, like I can be sober whenever I want. I just...choose not to be, y'know?
Wiz: No no no, you don't understand. You see, the one thing that had stopped Gamzee from being incredibly strong and practically hurting everyone he merely touched was his sober state, the one thing that kept him from being a psychotic killer was his slime, and he had ran out, so it was time to kill.
Boomstick: And then he ended up...killing two people on the ship? Really, that doesn't seem that bad.
Wiz; But these two were exceptionally strong trolls, much higher on the hemospectrum than the lowbloods. Most of them...already died anyways, but that's besides the point. He was able to overpower Equius, one of the strongest trolls in the group.
Boomstick: But Equius never really put up much of a fight, now did he? I mean he kind of just stood there and took it. he's really weird like that. Into some BDSM or some shit.
Wiz: You still don't get it, Boomstick. Equius is so strong that he can hurt his lusus simply by patting it on the head. He breaks glasses of milk just by casually grabbing them. Since his hand and arm muscles are so strong, it's safe to assume. To just bypass Equius's muscles is a feat on its own, but to persist with that amount of force is insane.
Boomstick: Oh, okay, I guess that's fair enough, and what else did he do...let's see...woah! He broke Nepeta's wrist just by grabbing onto it?! That's incredibly damn strong!
Wiz: And may I remind you that not only did Nepeta hunt and kill monsters back on Alternia, animals that were several times larger than her on ocassion, but Gamzee also did this casually. he's never been shown to physically strain himself during many of his strenght feats, such as when he's choking out Equius, or when he casually broke Nepeta's wrist.
Boomstick: And not only that, but Nepeta had managed to claw him right in the face before he crushed her bones, and he didn't even flinch as she put three huge claw marks on his face! Seriously, he didn't even blink! Maybe I should cut back on my drinking if it means I can crush a guy's arm!
Wiz: And those are only a few of his strength feats. There's plenty more to go off of. You see, during the trolls' fight with the Black King, Gamzee was able to cause more damage than almost all of the trolls.
Boomstick: And in like, maybe a single attack he blew the thing's fuckin' head off! I mean come on, that's goitta be the size of a mountain! Probably! Maybe!
Wiz: And though the validity of this animation is under a bit of scrutiny, as people just don't know if it's canon or not, it is still stated that Gamzee caused huge amounts of damage to the Black King. Not only that, but he was even able to smash a stone platform with a single Atomic Double Juggalo Backbreaker.
Boomstick: Okay, what the actual FUCK is an Atomic Double Juggalo Backbreaker? When did this turn into WWE? And why is the Insane Clown Posse invo-never mind. Stupid question. It's Homestuck.
Wiz: Absurdity of the verse aside, there were also multiple feats that show off Gamzee's speed and durability. He is able to run circles around his opponents, moving so fast that the human eye wouldn't be able to track him. Heck, even Terezi's smelling can't pick him up, and Terezi has a damn good sense of smell.
Boomstick: And not only could he do some sick fucking flips, like, constantly, but he's also fast enough to dodge Rose's spells, and I don't know how fast those things move, but I'm pretty sure they move damn fast. Either way, suffice to say, Gamzee's f'ing fast.
Wiz: And his durability feats are just as impressive. Gamzee was able to survive this explosion, which he was basically at the epicenter of, and he was flown away a very far distance, and he survived the landing shortly afterwards.
Boomstick: He can also tank bullets. A lot of them. (You're going to need flash to get the full experience, but deal with it)
Wiz: Uh...how many times does he get shot, Boomstick?
Boomstick: All the times, Wiz. All of them.
Wiz: Well...besides that, even if you were able to brutally injure the guy, it's hard to put hiim down for good. Gamzee just doesn't seem to die, no matter what.
Boomstick: Yeah, he's probably been killed countless times in the comics, but he keeps on coming back, like some bad ex.
Wiz: I mean, it's so ridiculous that the author of Homestuck doesn't even know why he can't die. His only statement on it was essentially; "He's a clown, he does what he wants."
Boomstick: You know you're on a special level of ridiculousness when your creator doesn't even know how you work.
Wiz: Quite frankly the least impressive factor of Gamzee is his arsenal. He doesn't have too much when it comes to weapons, besides the pies and the asinine amount of Faygo he has.
Boomstick: Well, there was one part where he had gotten a hold of Aradia's Timetable's which I guess means he can travel through time.
Wiz: However, that's hardly what he's the most known for, and is loosely a part of his arsenal. His most iconic set of weapons though are his juggling clubs.
Boomstick: Well, and the horns...and the unicycle, and the weird puppet thing. But yeah, his clubs are the most notable thing in his arsenal. Despite the fact it's not a bladed weapon, or as practical as a hammer or a mace when it comes to blunt weapons, Gamzee doesn't need to be practical to be deadly. I mean, the guy practically screams impractical.
Wiz: That true. Despite the lack of lethality on his clubs, Gamzee is lethal enough on his own, and the clubs just add an extra bit of danger to what is already a dangerous opponent.
Boomstick: You know, this guy practically sounds unstoppable. Why are we putting him up against...anyone?
Wiz: Well, he's not unstoppable, just very dangerous. You see, Gamzee is definitely not the smartest troll out there. In fact, he's sort of an idiot at times, and he doesn't think through too many plans. Sure, he'll have the ocassional scheme, but there's not a lot of on the spot thinking.
Boomstick: Not only that, but if you were to sedate him, he's not going to fight you. I don't think he really throws a punch if he's not sedated, and it normally takes quite a bit to put him over the edge. You could put a lot of damage into him before he's willing to bash your skull open.
Wiz: Despite his weaknesses, there's a reason that this Bard of Rage has gotten so far in his universe, and why no one has been able to stop him when he's raging.
hOnK! :0)
Betty Noire[]
Undertale OST (One Upon A Time)
Wiz: Long ago, there was a time where humans and monsters had lived together in joyful harmony...
Boomstick: But then a wicked trickster called High Roller-!
Wiz: Boomstick, seriously?
Boomstick: What? Be happy I didn't make a fire nation joke. That's way too obvious and cliche at this point...
Wiz: Well, you have a point there...in the later years, there was a war that had broken out between humans and monsters, one that the humans would clearly win. Human are much, much stronger than monsters after all.
Boomstick: And instead of just killing off the entirety of the monster race, they instead locked them underground in some mountain to never be seen again. I mean...hey, at least it's not a genocide run, yeah?
Wiz: The Underground, as the monsters would call it, was blocked off by seven magical wizards, each one of them representing one of the seven SOUL traits. Two of these wizards happened to be siblings, actually. There was Agate Lightvale, the Wizard of Bravery,
Boomstick: And Copper Lightvale, the Wizard of Determination. Though, considering they were siblings, you know for a fact that they were bound to argue on some things.
Wiz: They just happened to have...very heated arguments. You see, Copper wanted to remove the barrier that surrounded the underground and bring the monsters back up to the surface,
Boomstick: And Agate wanted to keep the barrier up and preserve the peace. Honestly though, if Copper was going to regret it afterwards, he shouldn't have done it in the first place!
Wiz: Well, the two quickly became violent, and the two of them had gotten into a fight, and in the end, Determination had won out over Bravery, and Agate was mortified. She ended up losing her SOUL trait, Bravery, and ran away.
Boomstick: And like anyone who lost a fight ever, she basically swore revenge, and tried to find a way to overpower Determination. She needed a new trait. I...don't get how you change that, though.
Wiz: Mostly magic, I'd assume. Anyways, Agate ended up inverting her soul trait, and with a newfound trait, she went back to the kingdom. At first, Copper and her younger sister, Amber Lightvale, had welcomed her with open arms, but it wouldn't be long until Agate would challenge Copper once more.
Boomstick: And, with her sister Amber watching, the two fought. Though, in the middle of the fight, Agate freakin' KILLED Amber, and, understandably, Copper was a bit disappointed by this.
Wiz: Copper had lost his soul trait, Determination, and with a much weaker soul, Agate was easily able to kill Copper, killing most of her family on that day.
Boomstick: Reminds me of a Boomstick family reunion...glorious.
Wiz: Uh...right. Well, shortly after this fight, Agate realized that her soul was slowly dying due to the inversion spell that she had casted on herself. Her final actions involved sacrificing her soul to make something something out of Amber's body. Something...dark. And that thing's name, was Betty Noire.
Boomstick: I swear to god, this fight is full of people you wouldn't expect to be murderers. Alright, whose head did she punch off?
Wiz: Well, no one, as far as we know, but that's besides the point. You see, Betty Noire was made to make sure that monsters and humans would never come to peace ever again. She was to ensure the end of monster kind, and eventually, she swore the end of mankind as well, turning into a genocidal maniac.
Boomstick: Well, that's what happens when you're so old that the world had basically forgotten about you, and forgotten about most monsters in general. Her entire purpose was forgotten! I'd be upset too!
Wiz: Then you'd make good company with Betty Noire. But, you see, she certainly isn't some ordinary girl. With her new found SOUL, Betty would be able to strike fear into the hearts of her enemies.
Boomstick: And we mean that literally. You see, Betty doesn't have any of those normal seven SOUL types. She has her own, because she's a special snowflake. Her SOUL type is literally Fear, and no good can come of that, I'm sure.
Wiz: You're right. With her new found Fear SOUL, Betty is capable of causing people to see hallucinations of the things that terrify them. She generally does this to increse the shock value of her kills.
Boomstick: Not only that, but she can also make magical spears, kind of like Undyne, though these spears can actually tear a targets SOUL out of their body for...consumption? I think she eats them.
Wiz: Well, she's not the one that actually eats them. If you notice that pink blob next to her, you'd see her pet Akumu.
Boomstick: Akumu, huh? Is he related to that one guy?
Wiz: Uh...what one guy?
Boomstick: You know, the Shapeshifting Master of Darkness?
Wiz: Uh...no. Akumu actually serves as an extension of Betty's soul, and is technically a part of her. Despite that, Akumu can act on his own at times, and can help Betty in a variety of ways.
Boomstick: And the main way he helps is by turning into a lot of weapons for Betty to use, like her iconic scythe. Frankly...it's just a scythe. There's nothing really special about it, apart from making slash projectiles.
Wiz: Though, Akumu can also turn into an armor for Betty to wear to protect herself from other attacks. Akumu can even shapeshift himself to look like certain individuals, which combines very well with her ability to cause hallucinations.
Boomstick: Basically she's going to play all sorts of mind games to fuck with your head before she kills you. But did she really get this far by playing mind games?
Wiz: Well, no. You see, Betty is also physically capable of causing damage with her scythe, and not just that, but she's also able to take on Undyne the Undying, and she's even fought those like Gaster, Frisk, and Sans.
Boomstick: Oh, nice. Actually, on top of that, she punched a wall made out of pure stone and caused it to break and chip away. And that was with a casual punch too. Maybe she could punch someones head off.
Wiz: And with her various abilities, she is also incredibly durable. Not only does her black magic allow her to manipulate energy, but she can also create forcefields around her to protect herself from Akumu's shapeshiftting.
Boomstick: And even though these forcefields were eventually broken by Sans, you gotta admit they did a good job protecting her.
Wiz: Betty is also so durable as to take a hit from a spear from Undyne and treat it as if it was nothing, and that was before she had gotten a healing factor. After she had gotten a healing factor, she could have bits of her face blown off and treat it like it's nothing as well.
Boomstick: And this healing factor comes from a vial of stuff filled with HATE.
Wiz: While HATE allows her to heal herself, make forcefields, and even make tentacles come out of her arms, there are downsides to it. While when she does drink the vial of HATE she gains a healing factor and massive regeneration, able to recover from her torso being blown up, she does lose her sanity the more she consumes.
Boomstick: Which does mean that she's bound to make terrible decisions at some point, like Mama Boomstick when she's been drinking.
Wiz: Though, the cons and pros do balance out in a way. Betty also can chose to completely overwhelm an opponent with an army of pink slimes, which are, oddly enough, not attatched to her soul like Akumu. They can die at any point and she'd be fine.
Boomstick: Yeah, but that doesn't beat her main ability, uh...Robobo...Rabbi...
Wiz: Rhabdophobia. Normally it means a fear of magic, and in Betty's case, this allows her to essentially steal her opponents magic and use it for herself. This was how she was able to steal Gaster's blasters, as well as his magical hands.
Boomstick: And then there's the final form of Betty when she fuses with Akumu, known as the True Look.
Wiz: When in Betty's True Look form, she can morph Akumu into giving her arm blades, scythes, and claw hands, size her limbs, and can stretch her limbs. And can fire pink blasts, create dark magenta projectiles and certain dark magenta weapons and waves of pink energy. She can also create dark magenta explosion beams.
Boomstick: And with these kinds of powers, you'd be thinking that Betty also sounds as unstoppable as her opponent, but you'd be wrong
Wiz: You see, even though Betty has killed around 26 humans, they were hardly challenging. They were all from children, and the pink blobs were doing all the work, not Betty herself.
Boomstick: Though, she still killed 26 children! It's hard to disagree with the fact that, even in the world of Undertale, Betty Noire is the true monster here!
Don't worry, I'll keep my promise. I'll turn all those monsters to dust.
Pre-battle[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all!
Boomstick: It's time for a death battllllle!
Death Battle[]
Several miles away from Mt. Ebott, a small town had been lit ablaze. There was destruction everywhere as people ran out of their homes, screaming and running away in a mad panic to save themselves. Fires were started, little pink blobs jumped in and out of buildings, and every once and a while, a buildings structure would give in and the entire building would fall over on itself. Complete madness had taken over the town and everyone in it.
That is, all except one.
The sound of soles hitting the ground acompanied the crackling of fire as one lone individual either had the sense of courage, or the stupidity, to walk among the street calmly. This individual had curly black hair, a black shirt with polka dot pants, and two large horns sticking out of his head. His skin was grey, and his eyes were yellow. This was Gamzee Makara.
The troll looked around at the destroyed city as he pulled a bottle of Faygo out of his pocket. He simply shrugged at all of the destruction as he twisted the cap on the bottle, letting out a faint hiss to accompany the one that was released when he opened the container. The troll smiled and took a swig of his soda. Ah, that hit the fuckin' spot, right there. Though, what would hit the spot more was if he was in a calmer place. All of this screaming and destruction was really killing his vibes.
Gamzee's leisurely stroll down the street was only briefly interrupted when he ran into what seemed to be a small...pink blob. It looked pretty weird, but it wasn't the weirdest thing he's seen before. Not by a long shot. Actually, it looked kinda cute, from some angles.
"Hey there, my slime bro," the troll said in a scratchy voice that drifted off near the end of his sentence. "You're one cute little motherfucker, y'know? Want a sip of this wicked elixir?"
Gamzee moved the bottle towards the weird slime thing, not really questioning how it was going to drink the Faygo. The moment Gamzee made any more towards the slime, though, it jumped away like Gamzee was going to hurt him. Aw, now that just wasn't very nice. Though, the troll just shrugged and was about to continue on his way.
"You. Stop, now."
The sudden, demanding female voice made Gamzee stop in his tracks as he turned around to face whoever it was that was speaking. His eyes fell upon what seemed to be a little girl, with another one of those cute blob things next to her. She looked pretty stern for a girl who couldn't have been older than a few sweeps. What's got her in a fuss?
"Just what exactly are you?" The girl asked as she stretched her arm towards the blob next to her. The blob jumped onto her arm and began to snake around her body. "I've never seen anything like you here before, so what are you? Some kind of monster?"
"Monster? No man, I ain't no monster. I'm just a motherfuckin' troll." Gamzee chuckled as he took another drink of his Faygo. "Gamzee's the name. What's yours?"
"Betty, Betty Noire.” Betty looked the strange creature up and down and shook her head. "I've never heard of a troll before, but you look like just about every other monster I've seen, just a bit more humanoid. I thought I got most of the monsters in this area."
Betty then snapped her fingers and two spears appeared on either side of the girl. "There's just one more I have to take care of, then."
"Woah, calm down now," Gamzee said as he put his hands into the air in a pacifying gesture. "I don't want any trouble, y'know? I just wanna-"
Before Gamzee could finish his statement, Betty gestured her hand forward and the spears flew straight towards Gamzee. "Shut up and die."
Fight!
Gamzee, with a rather relaxed look on his face, quickly stepped out of both of the attacks, within the blink of an eye. Betty wasn't sure what he had done, but he was clearly faster than she had expected.
"Woah, that was a close one," Gamzee said with a chuckle. "That probably would've hurt a lot too. Good thing it didn't-"
Gamzee had been cut short by a quick punch to the face, a powerful one at that. One that had knocked him off of his feet and sent him barrelling down the city street. "I said shut up!"
The troll eventually stopped rolling on the asphalt and slid to a stop, his shirt ensuring that his back didn't become burnt from the road rash and the friction, though, Gamzee didn't seem to feel it as he quickly popped back up and smiled. "Wow! You pack one motherfuckin' punch!"
Betty gritted her teeth as she stared at this strange monster. She could barely land her spears, and when she threw a punch at him, he didn't seem to even be phased. What's with this monster? They don't normally put up this much resistance, unless they're someone special, that is...
Betty sighed and looked at the slime that was wrapped around her arms. She snapped her fingers and Akumu bolted into her hand, forming a giant, double headed hammer. Well, if she couldn't hurt him with her punches, she'd just have to pack a little more heat!
With a gleam in her eyes, Betty ran towards Gamzee, who was just now standing up, and brought her hammer back similar to a baseball bat. Once she had readied her swing, she brought it forward onto Gamzee, and the troll did nothing to stop it.
Gamzee flew far back due to the blow of the hammer, and he eventually ended up hitting the wall of one of the already terribly damaged buildings. The brick wall then collapsed on top of Gamzee and he was completely buried underneath the collapsed wall.
Within the blink of an eye, Betty was near the pile of bricks. She raised her hand up and the bricks suddenly floated up into the air, revealing a surprisingly calm Gamzee, a stupid smile still on his face. What was wrong with this guy!?
Betty made the bricks fly far away from the two with a mere flick of her hand before picking up Gamzee with a similar rising gesture. She then tossed Gamzee up into the air to make sure that he wasn’t going anywhere. Once that was done, she teleported up into the air with Gamzee and slammed her hammer down onto his chest. Gamzee was slammed down into the ground, hard. The resulting impact made several chunks of asphalt to fly into the air.
Betty let out a huff of breath to signal her annoyance as she Teleported back to the ground. Well, that should do him in. Now she could-Oh for the love of god!
“Okay, guess you really wanna hurt me, huh?” Gamzee asked as he slowly stood up from the crater he made in the ground. “Well, now I gotta take off the motherfuckin’ gloves here man.”
“Just shut up already and die!” Betty teleported right next to Gamzee and swung her hammer at him, hoping to hit him once again and potentially combo him.
Though, the impact of her hammer had never came. Instead, Gamzee had merely caught it with a single hand. Betty’s eyes widened in surprise as she watched the head of the hammer be completely stopped by a single hand. She looked the troll in the eyes and he only smiled.
“Yeah, gonna have to take this away.” With a single tug from his hand, Gamzee had ripped the hammer right out of her hands and threw it behind him. Within the blink of an eye he turned around once again and punched Betty right in the chest.
Betty wasn’t just knocked backwards. She hurtled back, bouncing on the ground until she was suddenly stopped by another brick wall. She landed in some sort of convenient store, hitting right where the soda machine should be, judging by all the soda that spilled onto the floor, getting her clothes wet. Great, that would be a pain to clean out, too…
“Man, you got far.” The troll was there once again, right in front of Betty, and she certainly wasn’t happy to see him. “I feel like there should be some fuckin’ contest for that, y’know? How far you should punch a person? I know a lot of people who would be good with that.”
“What is it going to take for you to shut up? You just keep talking!” Suddenly, Akumu was back in Betty’s hand. She wasn’t entirely sure how he got back, but she wasn’t going to complain. Now it was time for her scythe.
Akumu then formed into a scythe and Betty twirled it around in her hands before teleporting behind Gamzee and stabbing him in the back with the blade. The troll didn’t even flinch, and that made Betty more furious than anything else.
Betty then threw her scythe out into the streets, and summoned several spears that would soon afterwards dive towards the scythe in the road. As the spears flew towards Gamzee, Akumu would quickly get out of the way and leave the troll to his fate.
Though, Gamzee was still too quick to be tagged, as he moved out of the way of most of the spears, only being lightly grazed by one of them. By the time it took for him to avoid all of the spears, though, Betty had teleported outside and was ready to toss another volley of spears in Gamzee’s direction.
Gamzee was on top of her before she could even make the spears move, however. The troll had brought his club up and intended to slam it down onto her. Betty gasped and, in a last ditch effort to protect herself, summoned a forcefield around her.
She did it just in time, too, as the moment Gamzee slammed down on the forcefield, it caused enough force to make the entire thing shake, cracks running along the entirety of it. If she was just a second too late...no, no time to think about that at the moment. She had to keep going.
Betty teleported out of the forcefield and behind Gamzee. Before the troll could react, she picked him up once more and flicked him away with a gesture of her hand. Gamzee went flying through the air, though only for a moment, as Betty would then snap her fingers to cause spears to appear above Gamzee.
The spears plummeted down towards the Troll’s chest, and once they made contact, they exploded into a wondrous ball of light that could be seen from miles away. The force propelled Gamzee down into a building, and the resulting crash landing caused the entire building to collapse on top of him.
Betty stared towards the ruins of the building. Nothing stirred, and for a second she thought she was safe, but then the pile of bricks and mortar that was the building suddenly erupted as the troll broke out of the pile. Bricks flew around in every direction and Gamzee ran towards her so quickly that Betty could barely process it.
Gamzee swung towards Betty the moment he was close enough to do so, but she had teleported out of the way once again. Man, she was better than he thought. Normally he can at least get a hit on those monsters in his SGRUB game. Well, she’s obviously not some monster, but still, it’s strange. Too bad he had to beat the shit outta her. Maybe they could’ve been friends. That would’ve been nice.
“Hey, you idiot, look over here.” The familiar voice had shot Gamzee out of his thoughts, and he blinked for a moment before turning around to see whoever was there. Imagine his surprise to see the glasses wearing cerulean blood, Vriska Serket.
“W-Woah. Vriska, bro, when did...when did you get here?” Gamzee took a step back. Spider girl here was always intimidating to him. Considering she could just brainwash anyone, and is quite frankly cruel, you can’t really blame him. “I thought you were...somewhere else?”
“Ha, that’s what you thought. I was just thinking I could check up on you, but now I see that you’re in a fight you can’t win.” Vriska took several steps towards Gamzee, which resulted in the high troll stepping back and putting his hands up.
“I can’t win? What do you mean by that?”
“I mean you can’t win, you idiot! I didn’t think you were that dense. I mean, you can’t even land a hit on the girl. How do you plan on killing her if you can’t even hit her, huh?” Vriska let out a cackle that made Gamzee’s purple blood run cold. “Seriously Gamzee, you should just give up.”
“Give up..? Give...give up?” Gamzee shook his head as he stared down at his clubs. Give up? Just give up and go home? He could very easily do that, actually. Maybe he should… “Maybe you have a good idea…”
“Of course I have a good idea! Did you expect anything else coming from me?” Vriska chuckled. “Now, just go ahead and lay down, pray to those Mirthful Messiahs or whatever you call them, and die a painful death!”
At the mention of his religious figures, something seemed to be set off inside Gamzee. His head tilted to the side slightly and his eyes narrowed, if only slightly. Was she...was she making fun of the Messiahs? Oh, he could not have that...he needed to defend them! Suddenly, all Gamzee saw was red. His blood boiled and he charged forward with his club. “Die!”
Betty watched with wide eyes as Gamzee seemed to completely break through her fear spell. What!? How did he do that? That was the one thing that he had feared! If that didn’t work, then what the hell was going to work!?
“You wanna kill me, motherfucker!?” Gamzee shouted as he turned to face Betty, causing the girl to panic. How did he know where she was!? “Well you better try harder than that, because I’m coming at ya with everything I motherfuckin’ got!”
Gamzee then leaped forward and attempted to slam his club directly into Betty’s face. Betty teleported out of the way and the next thing Gamzee felt was something stab into his back, and then another explosion that send him merely stumbling forward. Not nearly as bad as the last time. Gamzee chuckled and turned around.
“I’m going to kill you. I am going to MOTHERFUCKIN’ KILL YOU!” Gamzee lunged forward again and Betty teleported out of the way. He found her, lunged forward once again, and she still teleported out of the way. This girl was really difficult to hit.
“Stay still motherfucker!” Gamzee shouted as he swung at her again and again, and every time she’d teleport just a little further out of the way. Gamzee just couldn’t hit her! What was he supposed to do?
Then at one point, when Gamzee swung his club at her, she didn’t teleport just a few feet away, and instead teleported out of Gazmee’s field of view. Gamzee grumbled to himself and turned around, only to see a scythe coming straight towards his face.
The blade dug deep into his cheek and began to go from one side of his face to the other, causing a large gash to decorate his face, with purple blood just pooling out of his system. Betty raised an eyebrow at this. Blood? Well that didn’t make him a monster then, but what the hell was he?
Gamzee suddenly grabbed Betty’s scythe and tugged on it, using it to pull her into a different position. The forceful movement caused Betty to trip and fall onto the ground, still holding her scythe. She groaned to herself and quickly attempted to get back up.
“HOMERUN MOTHERFUCKER!” Before Betty could swipe at Gamzee or teleport out of the way, Gamzee had hit her in the back with his club, and he hit her hard. Betty could have sworn she heard her spine break in two the moment that he hit her. It certainly felt like it.
Betty let out a loud, high pitched scream as she sailed through the air, towards Mt. Ebott, still carrying her scythe. She saw the town she was just in disappear, until it was eventually just a small dot off in the distance. She didn’t expect that damn thing to hit with such force. Nothing that she faced packed that much strength.
Betty was about to teleport back to the town, and hopefully heal herself, but then she had hit the stone wall of the mountain. She flew into it face first, and she was going at it with enough force to completely break through the face of the mountain. She’d break through several layers of rock before she finally broke through the entirety of the mountain and into the Underground. When she finally broke through, she was able to land onto the ground and roll around in...snow? It was something cold, so she could only assume it’s snow.
Once she had stopped rolling on the ground, she took a moment to analyze her surroundings from a laying position. Yeah, this seemed to be Snowdin, and if she had to guess, she was probably next to Sans’s house. Great…
Now Betty had to look at herself, and she had to admit she was a little worse for wear. She had somehow managed to stab herself in the chest with her own scythe, and she wasn’t entirely sure how. She wasn’t able to sit up due to the damage done to her spine, and her left leg was bent in a weird direction. Oh, and she could see a little bit of the bone. She had to admit, that hurt...a lot.
Luckily, she had her slime friend with her, and Akumu seemed to know what to do before she even told him, which was great considering she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to talk. Akumu had grabbed the vial of HATE that was somewhere on her person. Betty had to be thankful that it was still intact and not completely broken.
Akumu ingested the vial of HATE and Betty could already feel herself getting better. Her spine seemed to reconnect itself, and when she pulled the scythe out of her chest, the wound closed up immediately, and her leg even got better in a manner of seconds. Perfect! Betty quickly got up and turned around to see if the stupid troll was anywhere around here. She didn’t see him yet, but that was sure to change…
Sure enough, within a few seconds, Gamzee was in the Underground, and now he was calmly walking towards her, a smile on his face and a menacing look in his eyes. “Hey, thanks for the entrance. Didn’t want to make my own, y’know?”
“You sort of made your own, actually.” Betty muttered as she tried to think of a way to kill the troll. Could she cut him in half? Maybe...or maybe some HATE energy could help her out here? She didn’t know what this damn thing was weak to!
“Well, ready for part two, motherfucker?” Gamzee asked with a small chuckle. “I mean we still got a fight to get to, don’t we?”
“Yes, I believe we do.” Betty pointed her Scythe at Gamzee and was preparing to cut him down once more. “Bring it on then.”
“My fuckin’ pleasure!”
Gamzee then ran forward, and this time Betty was able to react to it. She sidestepped out of Gamzee’s way, and as the troll was stumbling forward from a missed attack, a tentacle suddenly shot out of Betty’s arm and wrapped around the troll. It lifted him up and slammed him into the snowy ground.
Once Gamzee had gotten a face full of snow, Betty used the tentacle to throw him off into the distance. Then, she had sent a wave of pink energy in the direction of the troll. It hit the creature dead on and it was sent flying back even further. Betty had an ear to ear grin as he combo worked. She might actually have a chance with this!
Though, Gamzee wasn’t going to let the attack go without one of his own. He quickly rushed back to Betty, covering the distance he was thrown in only a few seconds, and swung one of his clubs at her. Betty intercepted the attack with her scythe and the two struggled for power. Gamzee got the wonderful idea to then hit her in the side with his other club.
This knocked Betty off of her feet entirely and she flew to the left, tumbling towards Sans’ old house. The moment she stopped tumbling she sat up to blast pink energy towards the troll that was now standing over her.
Gamzee was hit by the energy blast and stumbled backwards as a result. Betty took this as a time to lunge forward and cut his stomach with the scythe, leaving another long gash on his body. Blood spilled out of the cut and stained his black shirt purple.
Gamzee growled in annoyance and lunged forward once more. He hit Betty from the bottom of the head with his club and sent her flying into the air. Gamzee then jumped into the air and prepared to spike Betty into the ground with his club. Betty was quick on the draw, though. A tentacle appeared out of her arm and grabbed Gamzee before tossing him below Betty. She then stomped on Gamzee for good measure and he plummeted to the ground.
With Akumu now flying towards her, she held her hand out to signal him to turn into a weapon, dropping her scythe in the process and letting it fall to the ground. She could pick it up in a bit. Akumu morphed into a giant hammer once again and jumped into Betty’s hand. She gripped the hammer with both hands and then began to slam it down towards the ground, and at Gamzee.
Gamzee moved out of the way just in time and Betty ended up slamming her hammer into the ground. The entire ground cracked as a response to her hit and she let out a groan of frustration before quickly turning around to face the troll once more. God damn was this guy getting on her nerves.
“Close one, huh? And to think I thought I could go easy on ya?” Gamzee chuckled. “Took the gloves off a long fuckin’ time ago, though.”
“You really need to learn when to shut up!” Another tentacle came out of Betty’s arm and it lunged forward to grab Gamzee, but this time Gamzee smacked it with his club and it recoiled in pain before going back into the girl’s arm. Betty frowned before shooting a beam of energy at Gamzee.
The troll was able to move out of the way just before the beam hit him, but by now Betty was fairly certain he was just playing with her. She was going to have to stop that...somehow. If only she knew what this little shit was capable of. Even his own fears couldn’t keep him down!
Before she could devise another plan, Gamzee had lunged towards her again and swung his club at her. She teleported out of the way and slammed into him with her hammer. He stumbled to the side and Betty whacked him over the head, though this didn’t seem to do anything but make him made, as he then tried to simply grab her, though frankly that felt more intimidating than being beaten to death.
Once Betty appeared behind Gamzee, she summoned several spears and sent them towards Gamzee once more. They all stabbed straight into his body, and then quickly exploded, the force knocking Gamzee far back, slamming into the wall of Grillby’s bar. Or, what would now remain of Grilby’s. Gamzee had left a massive hole in the wall that caused a good chunk of the building to collapse.
It didn’t stop the Alternian, though, as he simply jumped right through the roof of the collapsed building and made his way towards Betty once more. Was there really no way to stop this guy? Betty would then begin to shoot wave after wave of energy towards Gamzee, and while it would affect him and he would step back in response, it didn’t stop him in the slightest. He continued moving.
“Stay away from me!” Betty fired another wave of pink energy, along with a wave of HATE energy, but Gamzee kept moving. Betty summoned some tentacles to attack him, but he dismissed those in a single hit. “I said go away!”
Gamzee was then right on top of her, but Betty has had enough of this by now and stepped out of the way of the attack. She picked Gamzee up with her telekinesis and tossed him up into the air before teleporting into the air. She summoned many, many spears behind her and stabbed them into Gamzee’s back before slamming him down into the ground with her hammer. As soon as Gamzee hit the ground, all of the spears exploded, and everything in its radius would be obliterated. The ground itself had a huge crater in it, and so much of Sans’s house was destroyed that the rest of the building simply collapsed on itself.
Betty teleported to the ground and sighed to herself as she stared at Gamzee’s limp body at the bottom of the crater. He was a beaten mess. He had to be dead now. Betty shook her head and walked away, ready to go somewhere else to heal up. Before she could leave the Underground, though, she felt arms wrapped around her torso.
“Never turn your back on a dead body, motherfucker.” Gamzee’s voice made her blood run cold as she was suddenly suplexed into the ground. Her head hit the ground with enough force for it to crack slightly and she dropped her hammer in the process.
Gamzee wasn’t done yet, though, as he then used the momentum to flip them high into the air, spinning them around in the air like a damn lunatic before plummeting towards the ground, Betty’s head aimed directly at it. They both slammed into the ground with enough force that chunks of the earth lifted out of the ground, and cracks spread everywhere around Snowdin.
ATOMIC DOUBLE JUGGALO BACKBREAKER!!
[Music stops]
Betty groaned loudly as she felt like her back was broken for a second time in a row. This troll had something for her and breaking her back, something that she really didn’t understand.
Betty heard footsteps against what little snow remained in the town and realized that Gamzee was just leaving. He though he could leave her like this? Oh no, she wasn’t going to let that happen. She wasn’t just going to let him get away with this.
“A...Akumu...we need to...come together…” Betty then brought her own spear to Akumu and stabbed it into him before then stabbing it into herself. Though this would normally be a death wish for anyone, it wasn’t for these two, the two who were made from one SOUL. Instead, the two began to merge together, creating Betty’s true form.
Betty suddenly stood up and released a wave of energy that shook everything in the whole town, causing already collapsed buildings to go into a further state of damage, and it caused the troll to stop in his tracks entirely.
“Gamzee Makara!” Betty shouted in a distorted voice as her two arms turned into blades. “I give you my true form!”
“Looks pretty impressive, motherfucker,” Gamzee said with a chuckle once he had turned around. “Though, what do you plan on doin’ with it?”
“Give me one final fight, and I will guarantee that I will destroy you. That is all I ask of you. Fight me once more.” Betty took several steps forward as she tried to find out where she could stab him and have him die the quickest.
“One more fight, huh?” Gamzee chuckled as he pulled out a bottle of Faygo, opened it, and took one long swig of it. He downed the entire thing in a few seconds before throwing the bottle away. “Alright, motherfucker, you’re on, but you have no idea what you’re stepping into.”
“Oh, is that so?”
“Hehehe...yeah..” Gamzee chuckled and twirled his juggling clubs around in his hands. He then let out a loud cackle. “Welcome to the dark carnival motherfucker!”
The two then charged at one another, what would seem to be for the last time this fight. Gamzee was the first to act, trying to slam his club into her side like he did before. Betty intercepted with her bladed arm and kept the attack at bay. There was then a sudden wave of energy that caused Gamzee to be knocked backwards. Betty took this as an opening and plunged both of her arms into Gamzee’s body.
Once he was firmly stuck to her blade arms, the girl threw Gamzee over her shoulder, pushing him away with her foot for good measure. Gamzee slammed into the ground, but he was quick to get back up and swing at Betty once more. Betty once again intercepted the attack and stabbed Gamzee in the chest once more.
Gamzee took this as an opportunity and slammed his club down on the arm that was impaled into him. He heard what sounded like bones cracking and Betty merely winced in response. She pulled her arm away and by the time it left Gamzee’s body she could already feel it healing once again. She stabbed with her other arm.
Gamzee hardly gave any response to being brutally gutted by this little girl, and the only thing he gave to show he felt any pain at all was a little flinch. Gamzee growled in response and pushed the girl away from him, forcing her arm to leave his body, and this was when the troll would truly strike.
Gamzee swung his club at Betty’s side once more, and she was knocked off to the side, and while she probably would’ve been screaming if this was a normal fight, she had gotten so used to being tossed around like some children’s toy that she took it rather well and didn’t make a single sound.
Betty landed on her feet, however, the bottom of her shoes sliding against the snowy ground, and she quickly ran forward with her arms out once again, now fully healed. Once she got close to Gamzee, she sliced at his chest once more with her arms. His shirt, by now, had basically devolved into a tattered mess due to the amount of abuse Betty had given him, and the troll was currently a purple bloodied mess.
The troll’s response to the swiping was to hit her directly in the face with her club. She stumbled to the side and spit out several of her teeth, which fell on the snowy ground, with what was once white now being stained red. She growled and slashed towards Gamzee again, and again, and again. Her vision was all red, and she was determined to kill this troll if it was the last thing she did.
“Just die already!” Betty shouted as she continued to tear and slash into his body. By the time she was done with Gamzee, she wasn’t sure if there was a single spot on the troll that wasn’t purple, besides those eyes, which remained yellow with blackened pupils. Gamzee simply laughed in Betty’s face before hitting her in the side with his clubs.
Betty was once again knocked to the side, and before she could even try to get up, Gamzee stood over her, ready to slam her directly into the ground. Before he brought his club down, Betty summon a forcefield around herself. Gamzee hit the forcefield with so much force that it cracked. Within another swift strike, the forcefield broke completely into little shards of light.
With a now unprotected Betty, Gamzee grabbed her by the shirt and pulled her towards him. Gamzee slammed him into the ground and began to stomp on her stomach, stomping down with all of his might. This eventually caused Betty to cough up blood, and eventually the troll would cease his attack, but a few moments later he would pick the girl up again and give her a sinister smile. By now Betty lay limp, vaguely staring at Gamzee. She was on her last breaths.
“Sweet dreams, motherfucker!” Gamzee shouted before slamming his club into the side of her head, with all of his might. Betty’s head blew up like a watermelon in an explosion of blood, covering Gamzee entirely, the red now mixing with the purple. Gamzee let out an insane cackle as he let the body fall to the ground.
K.O!
The final scene showed Gamzee painting the remainder of Grillby's outside wall red with Betty's blood, while Betty's SOUL appears over her body and cracks into several pieces.
Conclusion[]
Boomstick: Damn, and I thought we left the extra long fights to people like Superman.
Wiz: While Betty was a challenging opponent, she wasn't tough enough to beat Gamzee. She may have held the advantage in versatility and mobility, but she didn't have much else going for her, as she was largely outclassed by everything else.
Boomstick: Yeah, you see, Gamzee is just really, really fucking strong. I mean, if you can destroy a mountain sized head in likely a single attack, you know you've got something going for you, and Betty just hasn't been capable of doing something like that. Heck, the most she's done is go toe to toe with people like Undyne and Frisk, but that's not nearly as impressive as what Gamzee has done.
Wiz: But the main deciding factor was durability. Gamzee is, quite frankly, crazy when it comes to his durability, being able to take so much more abuse than he has any right to, which is a luxury Betty just can't afford. While her healing factor certainly let her last longer than she normally would be able to, it could only heal so much before becoming overtaxed, and Betty had no way to truly make Gamzee go down for good.
Boomstick: And Gamzee is overall more experienced than Betty. Sure, Betty has fought several tough monsters, but Gamzee's fought a whole planet's worth of them, and he's fought people who were similar to that as well, just as Terezi, and he was totally wreckin' her for a while.
Wiz: And Betty couldn't even use her signature Rabdophobia, as Gamzee doesn't have anything in his arsenal that could be considered magical. Betty couldn't take his powers and use them as her own, simply because he didn't have any powers for her to take.
Boomstick: So, in the end, I guess you can say that Betty, got trolled.
Wiz: The winner is Gamzee Makara.
