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GLaDOS vs X.A.N.A. is a What-If? Death Battle made by Gliscor Fan.


Computer products with control over nearly everything within their vicinity. Who will be the program to come out on top?


Wiz: Control. We all strive for it, and sometimes we even go to extreme lengths to keep it.

Boomstick: And sometimes, there are too many people out there for them to keep the control in the first place. Just like my ex-wife.

Wiz: As well as GLaDOS, the Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System.

Boomstick: and X.A.N.A., The evil computer program who tries to take control of everything. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapon, armor, and skills, to find out who would win a Death Battle.


Wiz: Aperture, Inc. Back in the 1940s, nothing exciting really happened.

Boomstick: Cave Johnson just gathered a bunch of random people and started “testing” them. For the future!

Wiz: But several years later, Cave Johnson wanted his reign to continue for a long time, so he created GLaDOS, the Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System.

Boomstick: Talk about acronyms.

Wiz: However, Cave Johnson discovered he had moon rock poisoning and was going to die before GLaDOS was completed. Instead, he told the developers to base GLaDOS around his wife, Caroline.

Boomstick: And thus, GLaDOS was then activated, went rogue, and released neurotoxin on a bunch of unexpecting children.

Wiz: But two people survived this catastrophe and stayed at Aperture Inc while a full scale invasion happened outside of the field.

Boomstick: So GLaDOS stayed inside and took control of most of the facility, while creating test chambers to help the people who survived the neurotoxin, because killing.

Wiz: One of these people was Chell, the person who destroyed GLaDOS once, then helped her get her body back after Wheatley stole it.

Boomstick: But not before getting replaced with a potato, getting abducted by birds, and figuring out who she actually was.

Wiz: But after all of that, GLaDOS released Chell into the outside world.

Boomstick: and there was no invasion, or even cake to be seen.

Wiz: GLaDOS has the ability to recreate test chambers out of practically nothing, can summon turrets, cubes, and other puzzles at will, and she can reconstruct herself with missing parts, all without the personality cores that restricted her thoughts in the first place.

Boomstick: But the most well known thing about her is her insanely intelligent computer brain.

Wiz: She can retain information instantly, and can recall on events that happened several years ago by voice recognition, or just for blatant insults. However, she cannot resist the temptation of Paradoxes.

Boomstick: The paradoxes are so irresistible, that at one point it nearly blew up all of Aperture Inc. Like holy shit, who knew a paradox can do so much damage?

Wiz: But can GLaDOS contain her control from the evil computer program known as X.A.N.A.?

GLaDOS: Okay. Look. We both said a lot of things that you're going to regret. But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster.


Wiz: During the 1990’s, there was a computer scientist named Franz Hopper who created a program to destroy Project Carthage, a weapon designed to disrupt enemy communications.

Boomstick: But then, Franz Hopper and his Daughter, Aelita, fled into a supercomputer to escape the government before the program designed to help them stop Project Carthage, kept them inside.

Wiz: This program was known as X.A.N.A., a program that was powerful enough to take towers and turn anything it wanted into a force of destruction to anything that knew about it’s existence.

Boomstick: Which, for some reason, meant continuously attacking a nearby school full of children.

Wiz: By connecting to any known network, X.A.N.A. used that to it’s own advantage, up to a point in which it took over a portal to Lyoko and spawned monsters into the school.

Boomstick: But luckily some random kids noticed it, took to lyoko, fought to towers, and deactivated any attacks, which basically made X.A.N.A. useless.

Wiz: … Or so they thought. After every tower Deactivated, within a few more days, another tower would be reactivated in a different region.

Boomstick: So to stop this from happening, X.A.N.A. tricked everyone into going to carthage, attempting to retrieve Aelita’s missing DNA sequence, and releasing it onto the entire internet, basically destroying all of lyoko. That’s pretty damn smart for a computer program.

Wiz: And after they find X.A.N.A., it takes control of William, a warrior of Lyoko like Aelita, and possessing him to destroy the warriors of Lyoko. Again.

Boomstick: But that’s not all, somehow Franz Hopper escaped the computer program, found the Lyoko warriors, and sacrificed his own life to erase X.A.N.A. for good.

Wiz: But that’s just the basics of what happened. X.A.N.A. did not go down as easily as it sounds, since X.A.N.A. also has the ability to take over creatures in the real world.

Boomstick: It can infinitely gain intelligence every time the supercomputer, Lyoko, resets itself. but only while it’s on the supercomputer.

Wiz: It can summon multiple monsters, on Lyoko or outside of Lyoko.

Boomstick: It can program other programs to protect itself, such as a Guardian, which is used to capture a prisoner and make it unable to detect anything that is happening outside of the bubble.

Wiz: and it can emerge as a spectre, the only way it’s able to possess objects without the use of a network. As the Spectre, it has all the abilities that a Ghost can do, such as Possession, Manipulate objects, and control any electrical source.

Boomstick: But can it stop the massive control that GLaDOS has over Aperture?

X.A.N.A.: And now you are going to witness the total destruction of the supercomputer, and the end of your little gang of friends!


Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all.

Boomstick: But first, thanks to Ahomeschoolinggroudon for the cover! NOW IT'S TIME FOR A ROBOT DEATH BATTLE!

Death Battle[]

GLaDOS: Hello, and welcome to the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center. Wait a moment, you aren’t one of the regular lunatics we keep around here.

X.A.N.A.: I have heard about you. You incriminate computer programs. For that, I must defeat you and destroy this vicinity.

GLaDOS: Oh joy. For a few moments, I actually thoughts my life was going to return to normal. But then you showed up, You violent, deranged computer program.

X.A.N.A. uploads itself onto the Aperture Inc network and drops a bunch of turrets circling around GLaDOS.

GLaDOS: So you are here to destroy me. You aren’t bluffing. Well, I haven’t had a good fight in a long, long, long time.

Announcer: FIGHT!

The X.A.N.A. infected turrets start firing at GLaDOS, while she throws blocks at each individual turret in order to stop them from taking over, but more turrets come and more blocks are thrown, until GLaDOS just drops several blocks in a circle, causing the turrets to continuously miss their target, and just attacks the blocks.

GLaDOS: Did you really think you could stop me that easily?

While the turrets are firing at the blocks, GLaDOS releases Neurotoxin all over the vicinity.

GLaDOS: Now, where are you?

In an instant, each of the turrets explode, and the blocks are launched directly at GLaDOS.

X.A.N.A.: You cannot stop me. I am just a program. You are but a computer that I can take over.

GLaDOS: So not only are you deranged, but you are also a malevolent, insane computer program. I guess there is no way but to let you go.

X.A.N.A.: What?

GLaDOS: I admit defeat. You win. Just go.

X.A.N.A.: I am a program. ‘go’ is not in my vocabulary.

X.A.N.A. recreates monsters from Lyoko and sends them into Aperture Inc. GLaDOS summons turrets to shoot at them and drops blocks on their head before most of them are eliminated. Then, GLaDOS recreates a testing chamber from Portal and drops some of the monsters inside, trapping them.

X.A.N.A.: You think this is a game? I think it’s time I show you what I can really do, my true form!

X.A.N.A. emerges from the shadows as a Spectre, and destroys each of the turrets by throwing them against the walls of Aperture Inc, until he finally gets to the command room of GLaDOS.

GLaDOS: What are you going to do? Destroy me from the inside?

X.A.N.A. gives a laugh and dashes towards GLaDOS. She attempts to drop boxes and turrets on it but it keeps coming closer until it completely possesses GLaDOS.

X.A.N.A.-GLaDOS: I know that I know nothing at all.

GLaDOS: No, you monster! If I know that I know nothing, that means I know that I know nothing, but I also know that I know that I know nothing, but I know that and… ARGH.

Aperture Inc: Self Destruct Sequence Activated.

X.A.N.A. escapes it’s captor as GLaDOS explodes into a million different pieces of scrap metal.

Announcer: K.O.



Wiz: Even though GLaDOS had control over the entire facility, X.A.N.A. can take over anything it wants, from stuffed animals to actual humans.

Boomstick: It can even destroy an entire program inside a supercomputer, and still live to tell the tale.

Wiz: Even though GLaDOS was smart enough to fend X.A.N.A. off for long, X.A.N.A. gained every single piece of information that GLaDOS knew by possessing her, which exposed her true weakness, the paradox, allowing X.A.N.A. to have enough time to because GLaDOS to self destruct against her will.

Boomstick: It looks like testing is over for GLaDOS, and the cake is still a lie.

Wiz: The winner is X.A.N.A.