Weiss Schnee vs. Iceman

DESCRIPTION

Joshuakasinski

Ice is associated with people who are are emotionless and terrifying. But not these two.

INTRO

Boomstick: Ice. It's cold, it's refreshing and it can make some sweet shit with some magic.

Wiz: Much like ice, people can be cool and refreshing. But they can often be at times inspiring.

Boomstick: Like Weiss Schnee, the Heiress turned Huntress and the reason there's a W in team RWBY.

Wiz: And Robert Louis Drake, known to the world and the X-Men as Iceman.

Boomstick: Oh god. He's gay in this, isn't he?

Wiz: No. Not in this battle. I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick.

Boomstick: And we gotta find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE!!!

ICEMAN WILL FREEZE DEATH BATTLE

Wiz: Bobby Drake was the son of Louis and Madaline Drake and life was normal for him.

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Boomstick: But Bobby suffered from, "Nerdyitis," a disease that shows why nerds get pummeled by jocks.

Wiz: Not all nerds get picked on. Like the Angry Video Game Nerd.

Boomstick: Whatever. AVGN's a badass.

Wiz: Bobby and his then girlfriend were then confronted by his childhood bully, Rocky Beasley and his gang.

Boomstick: But before Rocky could stuff Bobby in the dumpster, Bobby turned him into a big block of ice, literally.

Wiz: This was the begining of Bobby's mutant power which was Cryokinesis.

Boomstick: But since this takes place in the 60's, Bobby ended up almost getting lynched.

Wiz: The local police took Bobby for his protection and was confronted by Charles Xavier.

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Boomstick: Charlie boy decided to let him join his little group of heroes known as the Avengers! Just kiddin'. He joined the X-Men.

Wiz: With the X-Men, Bobby would find a way to help people and embrace his new power as the Iceman.

Boomstick: As Iceman, Bobby can freeze his body so that it can actually turn into ice. Huh, that's kind of cool, eh Wiz?

Wiz: Stop it. With his Cryokinisis, Iceman can make amazing weapons such as:

• Ice blades,

• Ice balls,

• Ice bats,

• Ice shields,

• And ice slides (For traveling). 

Iceman's powers are facinating, but what he can do with it is just as facinating, if not more. He can freeze and unfreeze anything, he's even remade his whole body from someone else's bodily fluids.

Boomstick: The fact he gets remade from someone else's urine and blood is just gross.

Wiz: He even froze a celestial's ship, which is about the size of Brooklyn. Given Brooklyn's size, he must have used enough energy equivalant to over 10,000 tons of TNT.

Boomstick: Whoa. WHAT ELSE CAN HE DO?!

Wiz: Well, he can literally make it rain.

Boomstick: Lame.

Wiz: He's taken out the Human Tourch and has froze everything around him to almost absolute zero.

X-Men The Last Stand Iceman VS Pyro

Boomstick:That's not lame.

Wiz: While being burned alive by Pyro, he survived. And yes, THE Pyro who could melt bullets out of thin air. To do this, Pyro's fire must have been over 600 degrees Fahrenheit. Iceman could survive this in his Iceman state. Bobby's even frozen cars while they were thrown in mid-air!

Boomstick: Hey Wiz, I want ice powers!!

Wiz: NO.

Boomstick: Please? Fine. 

WEISS SCHNEE IS MORE THAN A NAME IN DEATH BATTLE

Wiz: To say that the world of Remnant is unusual is an understatement. Giant monsters called Grimm attack cities,

every weapon that isn't a gun is now a gun and teenagers are trained to attack these monsters.

Boomstick: Sounds like heaven to me, Wiz.

Wiz: You're really creeping me out.

Boomstick: Ha! Too easy. So to fight against the hoardes of Grimm, mankind made the best weapon ever invented by nerds: GUNS!!!

Wiz: These weapons were powered by dust, an energy source that harness the power of four elements: fire, wind, water and earth. Believe it or not you could even stab yourself with crystalized dust to make yourself stronger.

Boomstick: Like my personal hero: Bane. But let's not talk about him, let's talk about the Schnee Dust Company.

Wiz: The Schnee Dust Company is owned by Jacques Schnee, who had three children: Winter, Whitley and Weiss.

Boomstick: Weiss wanted nothing more than to be a huntress, but her dad was a shit who didn't think she was nothing more than her name.

Wiz: So she went to Beacon Academy and became part of a team with Ruby Rose, Blake Belladona and Yang Xiao Long, putting the W in team RWBY.

Boomstick: Her time at Beacon made her into an almost better person. But Cinder and her henchmen were like, "Screw that! Let's destroy the school!"

Wiz: After being sent home and having all ties with her father cut off, Weiss ran away to help her friends with her sword: Myrtenaster.

Boomstick: Myrtenaster is the lovechild of a six-shooter pistol and a fancy sword. But instead of bullets, it's that fancy dust. Weiss' sword here has six:

• Ice,

• Fire,

• Wind,

• Lightning,

• Hard-Light

• and Gravity.

Wiz: The Gravity, Lightning and Hard-Light--

Boomstick: What the hell is Hard-Light?!

Wiz: Hard-Light is a hypothetical material that is made of light. Think of the Crystal Gems from Steven Universe, they literally state they are made of light and are like holograms but with mass.

Boomstick: Ooh, a hologram but with mass. How does that work?

Wiz: I don't know, Crystal Gem anatomy is strange.

Boomstick: Not that, how does a hologram have mass?

Wiz: I... That's a good question.

Boomstick: While Wiz figures out that crap, let's talk about some of the crazy stuff Weiss has done.

Wiz: But first, let's talk about her semblance.

Boomstick: What's a semblance, you ask? Well, it's like an X-Gene for the RWBY Universe. Some are pretty awesome. Some are just frickin' lame.

Wiz: Weiss' semblance can create glyphs, which are symbols that can manipulate things like this:

• White Glyphs speed objects up,

• Black Glyphs freeze objects in place,

• And with a few Glyphs and lightning dust, Weiss can slow down time.

Her Glyphs can even make Hard-Light constructs like I was talking about earlier. With this, Weiss can make several constructs ranging from:

• Weiss can make a Boarbatusk which is a Grimm version of a warthog.
• Queen Lancers: A gigantic Grimm Wasp.
• And she can also make the Arma Gigas: A gigantic suit of armor that is extremely skilled in fighting.

Boomstick: Can we talk about the crazy shit she's done now?! Wiz: Okay, fine. Boomstick: Weiss has done the craziest shit I've seen.

• She's beaten a Arma Gigas by herself.
• Fought hoardes of Grimm for an entire day.
• Nearly toppled a giant robot with 2,000 tons of ice.
• Crashed into a pillar with 39.7 million joules of energy.
• Survived a train crash.
• Destroyed a Queen Lancer.
• And Weiss even arrested her dad. Take that, asshole.

  

  RWBY "White" Trailer Rooster Teeth

Wiz: After becoming a Huntress, Weiss has done amazing things, but she's not without weaknesses. There are often times where her emotions get the better of her, her summons can take long periods of time to make, Weiss' aura is finite and can leave her vunerable and Myrtinenaster has a limited supply of Dust.

Boomstick: Well, shit.

Wiz: Weiss may have been a total spoiled brat in the beginning, but she changed for the better. She's more than a name.

PRE-BATTLE

Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set and we've run the data through all possiblilties.

Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLE!!!

DEATH BATTLE

(Weiss freezes a Grimm and shatters it. Going down the street, she notices that the number of Grimm is lowering faster than ever. She hears a male voice laughing and Grimm growling. She runs into Times Square and sees Iceman going around freezing Grimm.)

Iceman: Huh. These things need to cool down. But where are they coming from?

(He sees Weiss from a distance.)

Ma'am, it's not safe here. There's beasts all over the city. Plus, I already have a girlfriend, so...

Weiss: Wait, what?

Iceman: Oh sorry, thought you were a fangirl. (Whisper) A crazy fangirl...

Weiss: HOW DARE YOU--

Iceman: Oops. Gotta go!

(Iceman creates a ice slide and gets away. Then, a giant Grimm flies at Iceman and destroys his ice slide. Weiss' Arma Giga stabs the Grimm and Iceman freezes the monster and shatters it into pieces.)

Weiss: Idiot.

(Iceman jumps back up.)

Weiss: Nice try, but there's only one Ice user in this place.

Iceman: Yes there can. That would be me.

FIGHT!!!

(Weiss runs at Iceman and goes to slice him. Iceman freezes the ground causing her to slip. Creating a line of white Glyphs, she charges at him while Iceman makes a wall of ice. She slices the wall while Iceman goes around and attacks from the back. Weiss dodges the attack and blasts him with a large blast of heat.)

Weiss: What's the matter? Can't stand the heat, Ice Queen?

Iceman: Yeah, right. I can stand the heat, but can you stand the cold?!

(Iceman creates a giant beam of ice with his hands only for Myrtinaster to cut through the beam and cut Iceman's arm off. He chuckles as he picks up the arm and reattaches it. Iceman freezes the ground again causing Weiss' shoes to freeze to the ground. He runs up to her and makes an ice sword. First, Iceman goes for a slice, but is stopped by Weiss' sword. She then cuts Iceman's arms and legs off and breaks the ice off her shoes.)

Weiss: Wait.

(Holding up the sword, she melts his limbs.)

Iceman: Really? Haven't you learned?

(Iceman remakes his limbs.)

Don't melt what you can't freeze.

(Iceman stomps his foot and creates a massive titalwave of ice. Weiss stabs her sword into the ground and creates a Queen Lancer and flies over the ice. She jumps off and with her glyphs cuts off Iceman's arm off again.)

Iceman: You really don't learn, do you?

Weiss: I do, but you don't.

(Summoning more speed glyphs and using lightning dust, Wiess slows down time. With this oppertunity, she slices Iceman into an infinite number of pieces. When she is done, all is left is a single drop of water on her sword. Slowly, the drop slides down the sword and drips on Wiess' hand.)

Weiss: That was fun. AaAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHH!!!!!

(Weiss screams in pain as she can feel water dripping from her ears, nose, eyes and mouth. Iceman reforms from her bodily fluids. She summons her Arma Gigas, who fights Iceman while Weiss is still losing fluids in her body.)

Iceman: Here's a new lesson: DON'T MESS WITH THE X-MEN!

(Stomping his foot into the ground, he freezes the Arma Gigas in a gigantic wall of ice.)

Weiss: What are you...?

Iceman: Call me Bobby, ICE QUEEN.

(Holding up his hand, he freezes Weiss into a statue of ice. He then walks up and destroys her.)

Iceman: God, that felt weird.

K.O.!

POST BATTLE

Wiz: Oh God, this is very brutal.

Boomstick: Wiz, you okay? You look sick.

Wiz: That is... Oh God!

Boomstick: Weiss had some bitchin' powers and feats, but Iceman's powers just blow that shit out of the water! Even if she could destroy his body, he remade his body from bodily fluids! Right Wiz?

Wiz: (Vomiting noises.)

Boomstick: Looks like Iceman's powers was just the frosting on the cake.

Wiz The... winner is... Iceman...

IF THIS DEATH BATTLE HAD A SCORE

Name: Royal Ice

Composer: Brendon Yates