| Felicia VS Nepeta | |
|---|---|
 | |
| Season | 2 |
| Season Episode | 10 |
| Air date | 05-14-2021 |
| Written by | Cider621 |
| Episode guide | |
| Previous Princess Daisy VS Blaze the Cat |
Next Static Shock VS Alolan Raichu |
Description[]
- Cute cat girls
- Blue as a secondary color
Intro[]
Boomstick: Cats, the overlords of tearing shit up
Wiz: As well as generally being well...douche bags and well also cute
Now cat girls on the other hand
No, Boomstick shut up
Hey, I mean they're mostly human
One of the combatants today is a minor AND an alien
Oh shit, nevermind
Felicia, the B+ class cat girl Darkstalker
And Nepeta Leijon, the Rogue of Heart
He's Wiz and l'm Boomstick
And it's our duty to analyze their armor weapons and skills to find out who would win a Deathbattle
Felicia[]
Humans suck, they can't even accept themselves let alone weird things like Darkstalkers
Well there was one darkstalker that was adopted by a Sister named Rose who gave her the name Felecia
A nun? How does she get away with being naked all the time then
It's probably the convenient fur covering up her important bits
Sounds gross...
I know
So then Rose died and Felicia left to be a music star despite everyone being racist
Unfortunately for Felicia-
Some douche-bag named Jedah tried to reset the universe and she had to help stop him
As you do
Lucky for her she was all-set to kick some ass
That she was very good at, despite running on mostly instinct to fight
I hope something else runs on instinct you know what i'm sayi-
No Boomstick, I refuse to know what you're saying
But most of her looks human I mean would it be wrong t-
Yes
But-
No
Ok, fine
Felicia is one of the fastest B+ class Darkstalkers, capable of dodging even the fastest of bullets
I know my guns and the fastest bullet travels up to 3,180.9 mph and she can dodge an untold amount all the time
Her status as a B+ stalker means she easily scales to other B+ classes, like Anakaris, who moved all of Egypt
He needed to exert an average force of 94.7 Megatons of TNT to do this!
And as such she'd need to be able to tank attacks of that caliber
She has cat-like scent
Sense of smell.
Oh smell my ass
Well...cats have a sense of smell 14 times bigger than a humans
Must suck living in alleyways, those places smell like shit and dick cheese
Ew
She fights by spinning in a ball and bouncing places and scratching with her big ass claws
And Sand Slash is a projectile that can possibly go meters away
I don't like sand
Why?
It's course, ro-
Anyway, Felicia after her time as a star decided to open an orphanage to make kids lives happy
| “ | Be cheerful no matter what! That's my motto | „ |
Nepeta Leijon[]
One day the troll known as Terezi wanted to invite another troll named Nepeta to play Sgrub on the Red Team
Sgrub is basically troll Sburb, if you don't know what that is you can find out in Thor Odinson VS John Egbert
But her Moirail demanded she be on the Blue Team...and that was that
Is this one of the cool Homestuck characters like John or lame like Karkat?
Well Nepeta isn't as powerful as John but not as weak as Karkat?
So a mediocre one
Um...yeah
Nepeta can tackle Equius who can tank hits from Aradia bot who can destroy a temple casually
She must've kicked it with over 400 tons of TNT!
Likewise, Equius is the physically strongest troll, he bruises the toughest of people by merely touching them and Nepeta takes no physical harm from him
She compares to Karkat who can move up to 38,146 mph (as determined in Ashley VS Karkat) if not faster
She casually carries huge animals
She has huge claws and can kill huge monsters in one hit
She also has night vision
Like a cat!
Yeah...like a cat
She has trouble taking things seriously however
She also may have a mild form of Autism, which complicates social interactions
What else can she do?
Well...she, like Karkat has the ability to
Nepeta: :33< *pops up* Hi guys! I'm here furr the show are you guys almost done with catculating my abilities? Did you tell them about my quirk yet?
We were just getting at that
Does every troll have dumbass ways for that
:33< Hey! You're sounding like Karkat but less angry but he's a cutie furr sure! Y33!
*Turns the comms off* Yes Nepeta opens every sentence with ":33<" and will work puns in and she makes double E words replaced with a "33" and actions are marked with "**"
Yep...trolls are weird as hell
Well either way the Rogue of Heart will...a...yeah trolls are weird
| “ | :33 < i can tell you like to play games, d33p down you are a guy who likes to play games!
.33 < i can smell a guy who likes to play games from so fur away with this nose, you have no idea X33 |
„ |
Pre-Battle[]
Alright, with the combatants all set and the data run through all possibilities, let's end this debate once and for all
It's time for a Death battle!
Battle[]
(Yes it is Marble Garden Zone but pretend it isn't)
Felicia: Tending to a garden
Nepeta: *Stalking her and pounces*
Felicia: Jumps out of the way Huh? What’s the big idea?
Nepeta: :33< Oh surry, I thought you fur a monster
Felicia: Smells the strange blood and well...whatever trolls smell like and decides it’s bad, she rips off her outfit and ready to fight
Nepeta: :33< Oh, fur naked, ahem...grrrr
The cats clash claws
Felecia: Flips backwards then forwards unballing and scratching several times
Nepeta: :33< *Hit backwards* Wow furr purrty strong
Felicia: Rolls forward to slash again
Nepeta: :33< *Jumps over her to slash her out of the ball form* Tackle slide! *Runs forward and just a sliding tackle, burying Felicia's face in the dirt*
Felicia: Flips upward and onto Nepeta jumping up to make her face plant the slashes upward then jumps up to slam her back down and the launching a sand blast to knock her away
Nepeta: :33< *Taken aback* wow fur purtty strong
Felicia: Launches another
Nepeta: :33< *Jumps clean over over it and rushes at her while slashing*
Felicia: Attempts to block
Nepeta: :33< *Takes a spare slash to break her defense then goes wild slashing even faster*
Felicia: Backflips and lands on her tail then kicks both her feet to knock her back
Nepeta: :33< *Taken aback before grabbing her foot and and throws her into the ground and slides into her scratching along the way*
Felicia: kicks her off jumping up then knocking her away launching her off and fires a sand black when we lands
Nepeta: :33< *Jumps over then slides under her to knock her upward then jumps up to slash her in half*
Felecia: Survives the attack and slashes downward to knock Nepeta down and slashes again
Nepeta: :33< *Jumps back to avoid the slash*
2nd slash and slashes her several times and slashes upwards, jumping up too to slash her more and grabs her arms headbutting and using her as leverage and flips around her to kick her in the back then jumps off her and slashes her all the way down*
Felecia: Gets up by kicking her in the back then spins around and catching her in the attacks before breaking the ball and slashes more and faster before kicking her away
The cat girls stare at each before rushing at each other, moving fast enough to supposedly disappear, while pink and blue slashes are visible as they fight at high speeds zipping all over the place and they both hit each other back as the sounds of their speedy tussle suddenly sound off with air visibly being knocked away to show where the hits were
Felicia: Dashes at her in a ball
Nepeta: :33< *Holds her paws out to block the attack*
Their clash build as Nepeta starts getting pushed backwards blood starting to cake the ground as Nepeta starts getting overpowered
Nepeta: :33< *Her defense breaks* Nyo!
Felecia: Breaks her ball and starts slashing incredibly fast before digging her claws in split her in half
Nepeta: :33< *Her upper half lands abit away*
KO
Analysis[]
Welp, looks like Homestuck loses again, perhaps we just overestimate their world; or underestimate their opponents
Well Nepeta did have a few good advantages, like a 11.9 times speed and reaction advantage, and a melee range advantage
Which mattered cause it’s not like Felicia could use her easily avoidable sand attack to keep Nepeta away
Nepeta also had an experience advantage, as she actually has some
Nepeta’s culture as a hunter let her develop skills as an experienced fighter while Felicia relied only on instinct
Though Felicia’s advantages were what caught her the win, she could lift way more than Nepeta
As well as outmaneuver her
As well as having a massive striking and durability advantage
Basically Nepeta couldn’t put down Felicia while, Felicia could DEFINITELY put her down
And if we were to scale Nepeta’s speed to another troll of her level, we’d do the same for Felicia, except to a darkstalker of her level
Which pits them both at faster than light!
Which, wouldn’t change the results, they would just be faster
Looks like Nepeta was Felicia’s meow mix
The winner is Felicia
Battle Track[]
The battle track is called "Kitty Kerfuffle x3"
they're cats fighting and it has alliteration as and the x3 is for Nepeta
Next Time[]
Next time on Deathbattle
Electricity sparks up as a blue and yellow streak zoom by by two electric surfers
