Dian vs Discord is a What-If? episode of Death Battle by Mega-PoNEO, featuring Dian from Jewelpet franchise and Discord from My Little Pony franchise.
Description[]
Jewelpet VS My Little Pony! Who would win: The god of chaos, or one gray boi?
Interlude[]
Wiz: Dark magic, chaos magic, whatever it's called, it plunges the world into chaos, turns characters to the opposite of their virtues, and warps reality. These two possess it.
Boomstick: And which one would beat the other in a snap: Jewelpet's, or My Little Pony's?
Wiz: Dian, the Jewelpet of Self-Control.
Boomstick: And Discord, the god of chaos.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle.
Dian[]
(*Cues: Magi? Magi! Magical Jewel*)
Wiz: Dian is a Jewelpet, a magical animal from Jewel Land.
Boomstick: The first time we featured a magical critter from a franchise for little girls, she proved to be one of the most awesome things we discovered! And the Jewelpets have genuinely surprised me, too. Why are they so awesome?!?
Wiz: For starters, they can do roundhouse kicks and snap their fingers...
Boomstick: Memes aside, the Jewelpets have got a lot to give for our show.
Wiz: Believing that humans didn't deserve the Jewelpets' goodwill, Dian led a Jewelpet rebellion against humans.
Boomstick: He's got a dream. That one day every Jewelpet will control their own destiny. A land of the truly free, dammit. A world of action, not words! Ruled by strength, not committee! Where the law changes to suit the individual, not the other way around. Where power and justice are back where they belong: in the paws and hooves of the Jewelpets! Where every pet is free to think - to act - for himself! Dian believes that Earth is diseased. Rotten to the core. There's no saving it according to him - he seeks to pull it out by the roots. Wipe the slate clean. BURN IT DOWN! And from the ashes, a new expansion to Jewel Land will be born. Evolved, but untamed! The weak will be purged and the strongest will thrive - free to live as they see fit, they'll make Jewel Land great again! In his new Jewel Land, Jewelpets will fight for what they BELIEVE! Not for man, not for money, not for oil! Not for what they're told is right. Every Jewelpet will be free to fight his own wars!
...
Wiz: Dian may be small in his base form, but he sure is fit...
Dian: SHORYUKEN! (Shoryukens King into the air so hard that King leaves behind a twinkle in the sky)
Boomstick: But that's not all. He can also run fast and leap over mountains in a single bound. That would make him perfect for any basketball team!
Wiz: And yes, he has played basketball while assuming his human disguise form.
Boomstick: Whoa, is that Lelouch Lamperouge?
Wiz: Yes, they share the same voice actor...and superpowered eyes.
Boomstick: You should remember Sasuke vs Hiei from Death Battle Season 6. Superpowered eyes were also a connection between those two.
(Dian uses his telekinetic eyes to bend the basketball hoop, causing the ball to miss it. Later, Dian is shown in his normal form.)
Wiz: He can mind-control others with his eyes too. When he does this to other Jewelpets, he turns them to the opposite of their respective virtues.
Dian: Dark Dark Obsidian Eyes Power! (corrupts the Jewel Eight Jewelpets one by one)
Wiz: But don't think you can purify the corrupted Jewelpets just by casting a spell or by showing them friendship letters. To purify the corrupted Jewelpets, you have to compete against them in the Jewel Games. (The Jewelpets are shown dancing, playing volleyball, and kicking a can.) Eventually, Dian has Alex send an asteroid on a collision course towards Earth, and the collision is only averted when Rinko wins the kick-the-can Jewel Game to purify Alex, who then destroys the asteroid in a single Jewel Flash.
...
Wiz: Dian can also fire magic lasers that turn whatever hits them to stone. He also has a variant that resembles Buu's Human Extinction Attack in which he rains lots of lasers down.
Boomstick: What a fitting name for such an attack.
Wiz: Indeed, he's so dangerous that the Four Great Magicians had to seal him in a giant icy crystal for 1000 years. Eventually, his younger sister Diana freed him by powering up her own Dark Magic and electrocuting his icy prison.
Boomstick: And he eventually got his revenge on the Magicians and turned them all to stone. Alongside his magic blasts, he can turn his broomstick into a dragon with fire breath and eye beams.
...
Boomstick: Just wait until Dian grows giant...
Rita Repulsa: Magic wand, make my monster grow! (Throws her staff. Dian is then shown using his Dark Magic to grow to a tremendous size.)
Boomstick: After that, Aqua's Megaton Punch, which effortlessly knocks out thugs...has no effect on Dian.
Wiz: And Dian has one last form: Dark Dian. Take away his Self-Control and he will surrender control of his body to his Dark Magic to become the more monstrous Dark Dian. This form can withstand hits from Super Crystal Ruby, who can effortlessly destroy mountains. To put him down, it took combining the other Jewelpets' power into Rinko's Jewel Stick to fire a giant laser and retrieve his normal form from within. And even then, he was able to resist said laser for a while.
Discord []
(*Cues: The Living Tombstone - Discord*) Wiz: Equestria is not only home to My Little Ponies...but also to numerous ancient evils, including Discord. Boomstick: Thousands of years ago, this guy plunged the world into chaos before being defeated by Princesses Celestia and Luna...Wait, I'm having some deja vu here...Did I just say the same thing about Dian?
...
Wiz: Just like Dian, Discord can turn others' virtues 180. So how were they purified?
Boomstick: If you expected some Harmony Games to be used to do so, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but there were none. Twilight effortlessly cured her friends with a memory spell.
Wiz: Discord can effortlessly lift trees and boulders, and kick Doctor Whooves high into the air.
...
Wiz: But for all that magical power, Discord isn't very smart, nor does he have much combat experience.
Trixie: A draconequus with magic and half a brain might help.
Boomstick: Or a magical cat with plenty of brains AND brawn. Discord let himself get manipulated twice: First into betraying Equestria and handing all its magic to Lord Tirek on a silver platter, then into being captured in a Changeling hive while deprived of his magic.
Wiz: It doesn't stop there. I always wondered why he didn't just snap the Mane Six away if he can take away their wings and horns...
Boomstick: He's not Thanos.
(A clip from Jewelpet Episode 47 is shown where Dian snaps his fingers at Rinko, slowly disintegrating her.)
Rinko: Ruby, I don't feel so good. (disintegrates completely)
Boomstick: And Discord just gave the Mane Six their wings and horns back?!? That's...like taking away Popeye's spinach and then giving it back on a silver platter! And why didn't Discord just take away Tirek's mouth to stop him from sucking up ponies' magic? (Trixie is shown doing the same to Pinkie Pie. Then Boomstick imagines Dian throwing a basketball into Tirek's mouth, choking him.)
...
Wiz: The two times Discord was defeated prior to his reformation, the Elements of Harmony were used to turn him to stone.
Boomstick: Didn't Dian just do the same thing with his own magic?
Wiz: Yes, he did. But unlike the Jewelpets, Discord didn't - or should I say couldn't - dodge the petrification ray.
Boomstick: And speaking of the Elements, why didn't Discord just take them out of the equation completely instead of asking Twilight to "find the Elements where she began"? (King Sombra destroys the Elements of Harmony.)
Wiz: Not like that would do them any good...(The Mane Six are still able to tap into the Rainbow of Friendship to completely destroy Sombra.)
...
...
Wiz: After Tirek's, Chrysalis', and Cozy's final defeat, Celestia, Luna, and Discord turned all three of them to stone.
Death Battle[]
(Dian is minding his own business selling vegetables to raise funds for Jewelpet Season 8 to be made. Suddenly, a disembodied hand swoops by and steals four bags filled with Dian's vegetables.)
Dian: Hey you! Give those back! (He chases down the hand, which eventually reveals itself to be Discord's.)
Discord (after swallowing the bags whole): You sir, haven't made a decent comeback since 2015, while the My Litte Pony species is moving into the 2020's! And you're not a pony. So I'm stopping that Jewelpet Season 8 fundraiser.
Dian: And you have no idea what my species is capable of! I'm not your average cat.
FIGHT!
(*Cues: Collective Consciousness*)
Discord: Die. (Tries to stab Dian through the head with his claw, but Dian sidesteps and his telekinetic eyes stop Discord in his tracks.)
Dian: No thanks. SHORYUKEN! (He knocks Discord's head off into the air with a Shoryuken) That was easy. (Turns his back and slowly walks away, but Discord's head falls back onto his neck, then his clawed foot teleports behind Dian and kicks him in the behind) Another one?!? (He grabs the foot and slams it on the ground a few times before swinging it around and noticing the rest of Discord standing in front of him) You survived? That doesn't make sense!
Discord: What fun is there in making sense? (Dian throws the foot back at Discord's face, then the foot reattaches itself to Discord) Rocket Punch! (shoots one of his fists at Dian, but Dian just slaps it back into Discord's face. Discord slides back, stops next to a tree, picks it up, and throws it at Dian. When the tree is pointed diagonally down towards Dian, he jumps onto it, runs all the way across, jumps off, and punches Discord in the face, causing an invisible crowd to cheer)
Dian: Played college ball, ya know.
Discord: At some cushy Equestria Girls school.
Dian: Try Sunshine Academy. Could've gone pro if I hadn't been demoted to extra!
Discord: Sure, I'll spread chaos there once I'm done with you. (starts to Force Choke Dian, who then throws several magic fireballs which Discord turns into confetti.)
Dian: That's nothing new to me! (whistles to summon his broomstick, which hits Discord in the back and stops the Force Choke. Dian then jumps onto the broomstick.)
Discord: Two can play at that game! (creates a flying pig to ride on and a lance to hold) Charge! (he charges straight at Dian, but Dian dodges the lance sideways. Then as Discord charges again, Dian pulls out a tennis racket and catches the lance with it.)
Dian: Gotcha! (he fires a magic blast at Discord's head. Discord splits his head in two to dodge the blast, then puts his head back together. Dian then starts to rapidly shake the racket back and forth, dizzying Discord who is still holding the lance. Dian then throws Discord to the ground, pins him with the lance, jumps down, and repeatedly punches him in the face. During this no-holds-barred beatdown, Dian uses his telekinesis to move the lance and bisect Discord by the waist.) DIE, YOU PIECE OF *dolphin noise*! (punches Discord in the face once more, creating a massive explosion of Dark Magic and dazing him.)
Discord (pulling himself back together and breaking the lance with both hands): That won't cut it! (teleports a good distance away and has more flying pigs attack him alongside mean-faced balloons, apple piles, and butterflies. Dian shoots down and punches away most of the summons while dodging their attacks, uses the Human Extinction Attack variant of his petrification ray to turn half of them to stone, lets the rest jump on him all at the same time, and destroys them all with a massive Dark Magic explosion. Discord then turns the floor into soap, causing Dian to slip. The city block also shifts to night instantly.)
Dian: What the? (As his eyes glow, he notices that the floor is now soap. He whistles to have his broomstick hover over to him. The broomstick hits Discord again on the way to Dian, who then teleports onto it. The city block instantly shifts back to day.) How long is this fight going to drag on? (His broom transforms into a fire-breathing dragon with eye beams. As the dragon broom attacks Discord repeatedly, Dian jumps back onto the soap floor and starts to skate on it. Every time Dian passes Discord, Dian punches Discord. Discord is too busy snapping the dragon's fireballs and eye beams away to notice that Dian is also attacking him. Eventually, Discord grabs the dragon and snaps its neck, causing it to collapse. Discord then restores the floor to normal, causing Dian to stop skating.) Aww, I was enjoying this free skating session!
Discord (kicks Dian sky high): Ha ha! You should see the look on your face!
(*Cues: It Has To Be This Way*)
While still in the air, Dian suddenly stops ascending, grows giant, and drops back down.
Dian: Alright, I'll give you that one. I'll crush you like a bug! (He drops onto Discord, leaving a hole in the floor where Discord once stood. However, Discord then bursts through another spot on the floor. Dian kicks him upward and then punches him into the distance.)
Dian: Might makes right!
(Discord just happens to stop at another tree, which he casually throws at Dian, hitting him in the nose. Dian yells in pain, then angrily covers his nose.)
Dian: Okay, now I'm mad! (punches a second tree thrown at him, knocking it back at Discord who falls back a bit before growing to the same size as Dian's giant form. Discord then flails his fists at Dian who both blocks them and hits back with boxing combos and precision blows to the vitals while maintaining proper posture. Eventually, Dian grabs Discord, knees him in the chin, lifts him over his head, and throws him to the ground. A referee then walks in and prepares to disqualify Discord.)
Referee: 1...2...3...
(Discord drinks a glass containing chocolate milk, leaving the still cup-shaped milk behind. Then he throws the milk at Dian. The milk explodes, but only staggers Dian. Discord then gets back up.)
Dian: Falcon...PUNCH!
Discord: Warlock...PUNCH!
(Both combatants' punches collide so hard that they blow up the entire city block and send the referee flying away. Then Discord detaches his non-punching arm and pokes Dian's forehead to corrupt him.)
Discord: I don't know what your virtue is, but whatever it is, I'm taking it away.
Dian: My Self-Control...(surrenders control of his body to his Dark Magic, transforming into the more monstrous Dark Dian.)
Discord: I took away what?!?
Dian: RRRRAAAAAAA! (He launches Discord afar with a massive Dark Magic explosion. Then many Discord clones appear, swarm Dark Dian, and grab him on all sides. Dian simply repels them by creating a whirlwind.) YOU WILL ALL DIE SCREAMING! (shoots a large magic blast into the air. The blast then splits into many smaller ones which rain down and hit most of the Discord clones, causing them to disappear in a puff of smoke. Dian then shoots down the rest of the clones with smaller shots. However, the original Discord still remains and snaps the last of the small shots away.)
Discord: Fine. I'll just take away your will to fight. (tries to touch Dian's forehead with his claw again in an attempt to corrupt him "properly" this time. However, Dian grabs the claw.)
Dian: Nice claw...(Turns Discord's arm to stone, breaks it off, leaving behind a stump of stone on Discord's shoulder, and punches Discord into a wall.) Don't touch me! I'm sterile! And your corruption backfired the last time you tried it.
Discord (teleporting a mountain over Dian's head.) Catch!
Dian (notices the mountain's shadow, looks up, and catches the mountain): With pleasure! (throws it back at Discord. The mountain explodes upon contact with Discord, but Discord is still standing.)
Discord: Why won't you die?!?
Dian: Nanomachines, son. They harden in response to physical trauma. You can't hurt me!
Discord: And I've got my chaos magic, son. It bends reality itself. You can't hurt me, either!
Dian: Slippery little *dolphin noise*...I don't have time for this. (Both Dian and Discord shoot magic lasers at each other repeatedly. The blasts all cancel each other out. Dian gets fed up, punches Discord onto one more wall, and charges up his Dark Magic once more) I'll blow you away! (Lets loose eight simultaneous large and focused lasers. Discord shoots one of his own, but it only manages to clash with one of Dian's lasers. The rest then combine into one similar to the Elements of Harmony's, defeating Discord's beam and slowly turning him to stone.)
Discord: Not again! NOOOOOOOO! (After Discord is fully petrified, Dian's laser continues until Discord explodes into a million tiny pieces.)
Dian: Sanrio noticed that my fellow Jewelpets and I have a very devoted fanbase, so Sanrio is giving us another shot! But can you pull yourself together now?!? (The tiny pieces don't move) Yeah, that's what I thought. Now I'm off to make Jewel Land great again!
KO!
Aftermath[]
After Dian returns to his normal form and size, various ponies pitch in to his Jewelpet Season 8 fundraiser, giving him bits. After all the horrific things Discord did, the relieved ponies know better not to mess with their new friend Dian.
Ponies: Hail Dian! Hail Dian! Hail Dian!
Results[]
(*Cues: The Smile's Loop*)
Boomstick: Can all the king's horses and all the king's men put Discord together again?
Wiz: While Discord had the strength, speed, and durability advantages, his lack of combat experience and tendency to toy with his opponents led to his downfall. Dian is smart, fast, strong, AND skilled, and only needed to land a single hit with his petrification ray to win the fight. And he could do that at literally any point in the fight. The other Jewelpets were clearly avoiding said ray during the final battle of Jewelpet Season 1 for a reason.
Boomstick: Not to mention, Discord's initial victory over the Mane Six relied on prior knowledge of them so he knew what to take away from them. He's never dealt with Dian's magical Jewel Eyes, so those caught Discord off guard. Sure, Dian can be relaxed by warming him up, but due to the rules of Death Battle, Discord had no way of knowing about this weakness. Conversely, Dian has defeated Dark Jewelina, so a god of chaos would most likely be nothing new for him.
Wiz: And speaking of Dian being smarter, he's not self-defeating like Discord is.
Boomstick: Dian immediately Shoryuken'd Discord's head off, deflected his Rocket Punch back at him, double-teamed him with his broom dragon, subjected him to boxing combos, a knee to the chin, and a Gorilla Press, and punched him away to interrupt his second corruption attempt. That's smart AND skilled right there! Not to mention that while neither combatant was lacking in muscle, Dian proved more physically fit as opposed to Discord relying exclusively on his chaos magic.
Wiz: Every time these two used physical attacks, Dian usually won due to his superior combat experience. It helps that he can grow giant, further increasing his own strength. And he's skilled and accurate enough to punch fast-moving and regular-sized Jewelpets out of the sky while giant. Discord's lack of skill allowed Dian to land plenty of hits on him, while the few hits Dian DID take were only minor inconveniences that he payed back with interest.
Boomstick: Base form Dian alone can Shoryuken King so hard he flies into the sky and leaves behind a twinkle. So of course Dian would be many times stronger in both of his giant forms, capable of lifting trees with no effort.
Wiz: Also, remember when Dian defeated the Four Great Magicians? That was the equivalent of four Princess Celestia's, while it only took one Celestia and Luna to defeat Discord 1000 years ago.
Boomstick: Simple math.
Wiz: By corrupting Dian to take away his virtue, Self-Control, Discord made Dian surrender control of his body to his Dark Magic and become Dark Dian, sealing Discord's fate. Dark Dian has taken explosive magic blasts from Super Crystal Ruby, who can one-shot mountains. His base form alone is also comparable to his sister Diana, who survived an explosion big enough to be seen from space, crawled all the way back to his icy prison, and freed him.
Boomstick: And last but not least, Dian was defeated in canon with a beam similar to the Elements of Harmony's, but unlike Discord, he was able to resist it for a while by pushing it back with his own. The beam that defeated Dian was formed when the Jewelpets combined their powers from within Rinko's Jewel Stick. Not only can Ruby destroy mountains, but Labra draws power from the universe itself, thus making the beam stronger than that of the Elements'!
Wiz: If you're wondering why Discord didn't just snap Dian's final laser away or dodge it, it's for the same reason why that didn't happen with the Elements of Harmony and their giant rainbow laser. Dian is clearly the better dodger. His final laser in Season 1 was also able to resist an EoH-type laser for a while.
Boomstick: With Dian's skill, experience, smarts, versatility, and multiple forms, it was only a matter of time before he turned Discord to stone and blew him up. Discord Dian't have what it takes to win the Jewelpet.
Wiz: The winner is Dian.
