| Dennis VS Striker
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|---|---|
| Season 2023, Episode 2 | |
Vital statistics
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| Air date | September 9th, 2023 |
| Written by | MadMaxPyro |
| Directed by | MadMaxPyro |
Episode guide
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| Previous | Next |
| Gooigi VS Doodlebob | Scooby Doo VS McGruff The Crime Dog |
Description[]
A battle of two cowboy-esque assassins! Helluva Boss VS the Spongebob movie.
Intro[]
Max: Cowboys and assassins, mix them together and what do you get? These two apparently.
MadMaxPyro: These two cowboy-esque assassins are generally competent in what they do but as the plot demands they don't succeed in taking out the main protagonists they are after for one reason or another.
Max: Dennis, Plankton's scary spiked boots hired gun to exterminate Spongebob and Patrick.
MadMaxPyro: And Striker, the cool charming hired gun to take out Stolas.
Max: I'm Max and he's MadMaxPyro who is also me because I'm really just one person. And because I feel like it I'm going to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a death battle!
Dennis[]
Name's Dennis - The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie Video Game Music Extended
Max: In the world of cartoon villains none are as widely notably unthreatening as Plankton. We all know the story from our childhoods watching Spongebob. Plankton tries to steal the krabby patty formula with some scheme, it fails miserably, and Mr. Krabs throws the pathetic insect back to his bankrupt restaurant across the street.
MadMaxPyro: However, after so many failures there eventually came a point where Plankton stumbled upon his ultimate plan called plan Z. Plankton stole the crown of the highest authority in Bikini Bottom King Neptune, selling it to Shell City, and left a note to frame the crime on Mr. Krabs. An enraged King Neptune the very next day would pay a visit to Mr. Krab's restaurant freezing him solid in which he would then give him an execution by fire. Fortunately for him Spongebob and Patrick would step up to retrieve the crown given a 6 day time limit or else Mr. Krabs would be fried.
Max: Plankton with the formula successfully stolen finally making his restararunt profitable and the townsfolk enslaved by his mind controlling bucket helmets he knew the sponge and starfish could be a problem for his empire so he sent an assassin to kill them that he describes as a "cold, ruthless killer" known as Dennis.
MadMaxPyro: Donning a black cowboy hat, a spiked leather glove, red bandana, sunglasses, a skull belt, and a knife around his neck yeah this guy was too scary for Nickelodeon.
Max: His true weapon of choice though is much worse than that, his spiked boots used to brutally crush his victims in this case what would be Spongebob and Patrick.
MadMaxPyro: He does use that knife too though.
Max: Though pulling from the video game he has more to work with like apparently he can jump around and use someone (in this case Spongebob) as a club to chuck fucking toilets of all things at foes that also leave a spray of green acid I guess upon impact with the ground. What the hell?! I really didn't question this enough as a kid.
MadMaxPyro: Less weirdly he can also throw a volley of giant knives and summon two buckethead minion variants of Plankton's being a glasses nerd with an attack worm pet and a thug with a crowbar.
Max: Not that much of an arsenal but Dennis is more than just some weapons and minions as he has some absurd physical strength. When confronted by some thug leader about blowing a bubble he effortlessly one punch uppercut K.O'd that fool so hard he was sent flying all the way into his own bar ship with so much force it sunk with him. Safe to assume that guy died since we never saw him again. Plus Dennis also ripped the mouths off of two fish dudes who were talking shit and crushed a skull to dust in his hand in an instant.
MadMaxPyro: His speed is difficult to measure as we haven't really seen him move that fast directly on screen but he surely has some superhuman speed since he crossed from one of David Hasselhoff's legs to the other before Spongebob could leap across despite him starting at least while Spongebob was halfway there since we saw Spongebob jump while Dennis tried to grab him but then suddenly Dennis was already on the other side when Spongebob landed. He does also have his motorcycle. Motorcycles generally have an average top speed of 80-165 miles per hour.
Max: Dennis's durability is kinda crazy though as he somehow survived being stepped on by the boot of a human diver who is giant sized compared to him. This survival is shown when he came back later in the movie regenerating from just a splat of goo on the boot in the water. He was damaged with his clothes torn and sunglasses destroyed but alive ready to try to take out Spongebob and Patrick again.
MadMaxPyro: Dennis is also fairly smart as he was able to track Spongebob and Patrick's location just by blowing a bubble that showed them on it. Though despite his intelligence and all his impressive feats his cockiness was ultimately his downfall as hesitating to kill Spongebob and Patrick TWICE lead to his ultimate defeat when he wasted enough time for Spongebob to blow bubbles that stung his eyes as he was then hit in the head at high speed by an incoming boat knocking him into the water and we never saw him again.
Max: Still Dennis is a badass scary killer that you wouldn't want to fuck with in most circumstances.
Stryker[]
Air Strike - Helluvaboss Striker Orchestral Theme/Cover (put on loop)
Max: In the depths of Hell reside many species of demons both hellborn and sinners who lived a past life on Earth but the lowest ranked are hellborns known as imps. Small usually red creatures that look more akin to common depictions of demons across media than other demons in this world. Most imps are poor and treated horribly by the caste system but a select few found a way to rise up.
MadMaxPyro: Such as Blitzo who owns his own successful assassination business the I.M.P (Immeadiate murder professionals) paid by sinners to kill humans who screwed them over in the living world. With his employees Moxxie and Millie they carry out these killings with the power of a magical book from his uh lets just say royal bird "friend" prince Stolas of the Ars Goetia royal family.
Max: Though when the three imps were invited to a special event known as the Harvest moon festival in the wrath ring they met another imp assassin who wasn't quite like them. Someone riding in on a flaming black horse, a light beige skinned gold tooth cowboy hat, jacket, and bandana wearing imp/reptilian hybrid named Striker. He had initially gained mutual respect with Millie and especially Blizo but constantly boast superiority over Moxxie in various ways including in the event's test of strength competition that Blitzo and Striker came out on top in. But oh boy would he cause some problems for them soon after when revealed he was there to assassinate Stolas along not just for his job but genuine deep hatred for demon royals/the rich.
MadMaxPyro: And you can see how as he's quite the badass always ready for a killing namely with his trusty red knife useful for combat or a good old demon hog slaughtering.
Max: Or his long silver sword for more intense close combat.
MadMaxPyro: But melee weapons alone of course ain't enough for an assassin as he also comes strapped with his two handguns. Plus his lasso that he is quite skilled with able to ensnare foes or grab objects to smack them with like a large rock for instance. Ouch, that had to hurt.
Max: However, he also has his angelic weaponry used to kill demons of higher power such as the blessed sniper rifle, blessed knife, and blessed rope all used in attempts on assassinating Stolas.
MadMaxPyro: Striker i'snt all weapons though as he's a skilled fighter with his hands, claw scratches, and tail as well as having pretty high strength. During his battle against Moxxie and Millie with his absurd agility he jumped off Millie's axe and used his lasso to pull a rock stalactite off the ceiling throwing it down between them with enough force to knock them both back significantly. Plus he has casually crushed a cell phone in his hand.
Max: Striker's speed is impressive too as shown during the Harvest Moon festival when in a race he reached the climbing wall first way before dozens of other imps including Blitzo. Plus his combat speed is crazy as well able to react to and block/counter-attack against both Millie and Moxxie slicing and shooting at him at close range. Plus he has his flaming hellhorse Bombproof. Real life horses can reach up to 55 miles per hour but considering this is a flaming hellhorse it's safe to say Striker's is much faster.
MaxMadPyro: Demons in Helluva Boss are already known to be quite resilient and immune to certain things such as fire but Striker is probably even more so. Striker has shown to be durable enough to not only survive getting stabbed in the back three times by Millie but also be able to easily counter-attack knocking her out just by elbowing her and not really being phased himself. Plus he took quite the beating in a fight with Blitzo and managed to escape out the window despite his injuries.
Max: Striker is smart being able to slip under the radar with nobody knowing his true intentions until directly caught and was able to briefly get to Blitzo's head with a compelling speech to join him despite being held at gunpoint by Blitzo who was stopping him from assassinating Stolas. However if there's anything that gets him down it's his own cockiness always letting it get the best of him when he seems to have complete victory in his hands albeit still slippery enough to escape said situations when the upper hand is lost. Plus hell, he didn't technically fail to kill Stolas the second time around as the only reason he didn't do it was because the hit was called off at the last second. Striker is an awesome assassin who in most cases would get the job done.
Intermission[]
Max: Alright the combatants are set! Lets end this debate once and for all.
MadMaxPyro: It's time for a death battle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Battle[]
Days before King Neptune's crown was stolen a different royal court session was held than the one seen on screen. King Neptune and his daughter princess Mindy entered while the king's squire played his trumpet to a crowd of onlooking guards and noblemen as the king and princess sat upon their thrones. The squire stopped his trumpet.
Squire: The royal court is now in session. Bring the prisoner forward!
The castle doors across the room's red carpet instantly opened as two guards with spears walked in holding a chained prisoner. The prisoner is a small blue-ish fish in a chef's outfit as he is the castle's cook. The guards walk him across the red carpet as he shakes in fear being set down right in front of the king as the king angrily looks down upon him.
King Neptune: So you're the one who made that overcooked dish for me last night?
Fish chef(stuttering): I'm...I'm... sorry your highness...I didn't mean to...
King Neptune (slamming down trident): SILENCE! You could have killed me with that food you burned so now I see it only fitting that you suffer execution by fire!
Fish chef: NO!!! PLEASE...
Mindy: Dad!
King Neptune quickly flipped his trident activating its fire function shooting a large blast of fire burning the fish as he screamed in pain melting brutally skin peeling off until he was disintegrated to ashes. Everything then went black.
Helluva Boss assassination theme extended
Down in Hell's wrath ring Striker is laying low after his narrow escape from his fight with Millie and Moxxie. Laying against a wall in an alley with his rifle he doesn't know where to go or what to do with himself next. Suddenly he sees a shadow approach quickly holding up his blessed sniper rifle towards the figure approaching who is revealed to be a flaming fish demon who holds his hands up at Striker's aggression.
Striker: What the fuck do you want?
Flaming fish: I heard you specialize in killing royals. There's a king I need you to take out.
Striker lowers his rifle and smiles maniacally thinking this as his great comeback.
Striker: A king huh? What we talking here, Goetia? Lucifer?
Flaming fish: Well... not exactly.
The flaming fish explains the whole story that was shown beforehand.
Flaming fish: And... that's how I ended up down here.
Striker: You've got to be fucking kidding me! What do I look like to you? If you want someone killed outside of Hell go take your business up with the rodeo clown and his lackies at I.M.P. ...Wait a second, if you're a sinner how'd you even get to the wrath ring...
The flaming fish interrupts answering Striker's question by throwing down the magic book the Grimoire much to Striker's shock whose eyes widen.
Flaming fish: They wouldn't help me so I stole their book and a bunch of their money. So do we have a deal now?
The flaming fish throws out just one of the large wads from the bag of money he has for Striker's payment as Striker catches it quickly counting looking up and nodding as he stands back up.
Striker: Alright fishy boy I'll kill your king. But how am I gonna get to this "Bikini Bottom" underwater city and how would I even breathe there?
Flaming fish: The book pretty much lets you go anywhere as long as you know the name and I saw a spell about breathing in space. Should work underwater too.
Striker(squinting): Well, how convenient.
Striker whistles summoning his flaming hellhorse Bombproof who he jumps onto its back. Striker then performs the spells with the book opening a portal that shows the underwater city of Bikini Bottom in it. Striker pulls and whips the string on his horse to gallop running into the portal as it closes. On the other side of the portal they enter the city at night the horse's hell flames still burning underwater but they were still inconspicuous riding through the main streets for a while with everyone alseep before soon reaching King Neptune's castle stopping his horse's gallop. He spots the king through a window seeing the king with no crown anymore but instead a bag over his head but with a royal robe and trident as the fish earlier described letting Striker knows its him. Striker gets off his hellhorse climbing a nearby small rock cliff for a better view as he prepares with a sniper rifle for his shot. Suddenly though a motorcycle is heard in the distance as Striker turns around seeing it is being rode by a green cowboy fish with a red bandana,sunglasses, and knife around his neck who without warning throws a volley of large knives up at Striker who instinctively jumps off the ledge to dodge landing on his feet. This attack is of course none other than Dennis who stops his motorcycle and gets off. Bombproof charges at Dennis but the latter punches the hellhorse hard in the face sending him skidding hundreds of feet away on his back. Striker angered by this fired a sniper rifle bullet at Dennis's head who casually blocked it with his metal shoulder pad.
Striker: Who the fuck are you?!
Dennis: Name's Dennis and that king up there is too important to my boss's plan for me to allow a little land rat like you to take him out. Leave now or be exterminated.
Striker: Lets see you try broccoli built bitch!
Dennis and Striker stare each other down intensely. Striker slowly puts away his sniper rifle and pulls out his holy handguns as Dennis gets in a more serious stance.
Name's Dennis - The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie Video Game Music Extended
Striker quickly takes fire shooting at Dennis with both handguns as Dennis jumps to dodge while throwing another volley of large knives towards Striker. Striker rolls away dodging firing more bullets of which Dennis jumps over them pulling his main knife from around his neck landing down towards Striker swinging it as Striker blocks with his own knife but is left stumbling off balance from the force. This gives Dennis an opening to quickly overpower him kicking Striker's gut with his big boot making him drop his knife as Dennis lands a strong stab to the neck making him bleed black blood. Striker hisses loudly in pain and irritation as he body slams Dennis while giving some claw scratches but Dennis quickly retaliates with a powerful backhand to Striker's face that sends him flying against the rock behind him cracking it hard as Striker falls flat on his face. Dennis slowly walks towards him soon standing above him.
Dennis: Pathetic, you should have ran away while I gave you the chance.
Dennis lifts up his boot revealing its sharp spikes underneath putting it above Striker's head about to finish him but screams as he is suddenly stabbed on the side of his leg by Striker’s knife causing bleeding. Dennis hops back leg first in pain as Striker still on the ground follows up by shooting Dennis’s body with bullets rapidly landing the shots as he is knocked back a bit further and takes some damage. However Striker ran out of ammo as Dennis angrily stepped forward kicking his face punting Striker up into the air like a football knocking him higher up against the rock. As Striker was falling back down Dennis hit him with an uppercut punch sending him flying far away. Striker screamed as he was high in the sky but to his surprise when he came back down he landed safely onto the saddle of his hellhorse who had caught up to catch him. Striker pets him on the head.
Striker(smiling): Good boy.
Striker’s horse galloped away at fast speed back onto the road. Striker thinking he’s in the clear from Dennis takes his blessed sniper rifle back out as he heads back towards King Neptune’s castle. Striker then hears an engine though as he turns around seeing Dennis catching up to him on his motorcycle as Striker's smile turned to a frown. Striker shoots at Dennis who blocks the bullets with the metal on his leather glove. Dennis then throws three knives forwards at Striker who tilts his body to the right dodging the first two but the third hit one of his horse’s legs who yelps being slowed down somewhat as Dennis catches up ramming his motorcycle to the side of Bombproof hitting Striker's right leg with it. Striker hisses in pain while retaliating using his tail to smack Dennis’s face a few times knocking off his sunglasses as Dennis irritated grabs Striker's tail with his free hand and pulls him off his horse. Dennis then dragged Striker by his tail alongside the road repeatedly scraping Striker's head on the ground while still driving his motorcycle with his other hand. Bombproof though smashes his head into Dennis's arm catching it on fire forcing him to let go of Striker who lasso ropes himself back to his horse as Dennis uses his bandana to brush off flames. While Dennis was distracted by this Striker landed a quick bodyshot on him knocking him off of his motorcycle and before he could get up he was then trampled by Striker's hellhorse flattening him as he was damaged and burned more. Striker laughed as he quickly rode to the doors of King Neptune's castle as two guards hold up their spears but are knocked away by the hellhorse.
Striker dismounts leaving Bombproof outside as he stealthily enters reaching King Neptune's throne room. From an upper floor Striker spots King Neptune who is getting some attempted hair regrowth treatment from his squire with a spray. Striker maniacally smiles chuckling lightly as he locks onto King Neptune's head with his sniper rifle about to take the kill shot but suddenly feels sharp pain on his back as he was knocked off the ledge revealing to have been kicked off by the spiked boot of Dennis whose clothes and bandana were now torn off. Striker while falling lassos back up onto the chandelier of the throne room taking aim at Dennis who summons a bucket that spawns a thug who screams as he was grabbed by Dennis and used as a club scraped across the floor chucking a toilet towards Striker who has a look of confusion on his face as he shoots it out of the air. The toilet lands on the squire's head below knocking him out cold causing him to spray King Neptune's eyes accidentally covering his eyes with hair blinding him as he screams frightened. Dennis continues chucking more toilets at Striker as Striker lassos around the castle room shooting and dodging as Dennis evades the bullets behind pillars.
The acid waves from the toilets start to hit Striker though hurting him as he falls down onto the throne room's red carpet as Dennis jumps down landing in front of him Striker gets up unsheathing his long sword as Dennis takes his knife from around his neck. They clash a few times but Striker quickly gets the upper hand with his better weapon doing an aerial forwards spin attack that slashes Dennis's chest with the sword giving him a bleeding gash and knocking him back. Striker follows up throwing out his lasso wrapping it around Dennis slamming him to the ground back and forth multiple times before then throwing him at a chair next to King Neptune who still can’t see but is alarmed by all this sound.
King Neptune: GUARDS, there are intruders in my throne room! Dispose of them at once!
Guards with spears enter the throne room surrounding Dennis and Striker as Bombproof busts through a wall joining the mix. Striker stands ready with his sword next to his horse as Dennis summons thugs and dog worm leash holding glasses nerd buckethead minions as an all out battle ensues. Striker slices some guards and thugs in half with his sword as other thugs beat on guards with their crowbars with buckethead dog worm minions smacking them away while other guards manage to impale the minions with their spears. Dennis swats away several spear wielding guards who try to approach him as Bombproof charges at him but Dennis had enough grabbing the horse’s head squeezing and cracking his skull tossing the horse’s body aside. This enraged Striker who is about to shoot Dennis but gets smacked by a thug who smacks Striker in the head with his crowbar and stops to do his signature idiotic laugh. The thug is quickly silenced though when Striker shoots him in the head with a holy handgun killing him. A spinning dog worm suddenly propels Striker into the air though as he is caught by the neck by Dennis who then slams him to the ground. Dennis repeatedly pummels Striker punching him deeper and deeper into the floor creating a crater until Striker manages to kick him off.
Striker gets up only to see himself surrounded by a whole horde of crowbar wielding thugs who all start to beat on him as he grunts in pain overwhelmed at first. However after just a few seconds the thugs start getting cleared out by Striker’s skilled sword and handguns combination attack. Dennis charges in this time lunging with his spiked boot against Striker’s sword clashing multiple times as Striker hit Dennis’s legs with some point blank bullet shots hurting him but Dennis held his ground pushing his boot harder against Striker’s initially able to hold him back but then gets overpowered as his sword is broken in half as Dennis kicks his face with the spikes. Striker stumbles back getting decked by a straight punch from Dennis before he could even regain his footing sent flying breaking through the throne room’s doors.
Dennis walks forwards to inspect where he is but suddenly a white glowing rope is sent at him entangling his body in it as Dennis falls to the floor trapped. King Neptune finally managed to rip the hair off his eyes regaining sight but just then he is ensnared too as his eyes widen in shock. Striker walks out from the rubble smiling maniacally as Dennis looks angrily trying to break free but is stabbed in the stomach by Striker’s holy knife as he grunts and bleeds.
King Neptune: What is the meaning of this?! I am the king of the sea, untie me at once criminal!
Striker simply laughs taking his two handguns back out one aimed at King Neptune and the other at Dennis.
Striker: Well, gotta say you’re pretty tough celery stick but looks like I get the two for one special killing you and your precious king.
Dennis: Think again midget mole!
Dennis breaks free from the blessed rope with his knife smacking Dennis’s gun out of his hand grabbing him by the neck. Striker retaliates with a furious bite attack on Dennis’s neck but Dennis pulls him off slamming him by the tail against the ground repeatedly dozens of times. Striker gets bruised a lot, bleeding, and his weapons fly from his pockets as Dennis sees he is worse for wear proceeding to punch him hard sending Striker flying across the room through the castle wall busting through it. Dennis now takes his time first walking up to King Neptune and slicing the blessed rope on him with his knife releasing the king who is confused but grateful.
King Neptune: Thank you whoever you are, finish that thing off for me too while you're at it hm?
Dennis: Oh I will.
Dennis casually walks out through the large opening in the wall outside the castle. Dennis back out into the dark night where the fight started he spots Striker painfully trying to get up but Dennis throws three knives onto Striker's back that pin him down as he yelps in pain. Striker desperately tries to reach for his nearby rifle but is stopped by Dennis who steps on his tail with his spiked boot starting to pull him back. Dennis smiles sadistically as this is the moment he has been waiting for.
Dennis: Come on you little rat, give it up...
Dennis's spiked boot slowly rip Striker's tail off as he screams in pain with his black demon blood gushing out. Dennis then walks in front of him lifting up his spiked boot above Striker's head like in the beginning.
Dennis: Dennis always gets his man.
Dennis stomps Striker's head hard with his spiked boot impaling it as the poor imp screams in extreme pain as the spikes go deeper into his skull as Dennis grinds it on his head back and forth as his head is coming looser from his neck. This goes on for half a minute until finally Striker's head is pulled off from his body gushing out more black demon blood as it's still attached to Dennis's spiked boot who holds it up laughing maniacally in victory.
In the aftermath, Dennis finds his sunglasses and bandana back outside as King Neptune meets and thanks him seeing he got the job done finishing Striker.
Results[]
Dennis Strikes Back! -The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie Video Game Music Extended
Max: Ouch, that's brutal. Both of these assassins were likely equally intelligent with Striker having the better arsenal and was probably faster but Dennis's superior strength and durability ultimately overwhelmed him. Striker's strong, don't get me wrong. Pulling huge rocks around with a rope and crushing cell phones is impressive but nothing compared to Dennis who could just send him flying hundreds of feet away with a punch like he did to that thug leader guy or rip him apart like he did to the mouths of those gas station fish dudes. Plus, I think it's safe to say that shattering a skull to pieces with one hand takes a lot more strength than crushing a cell phone.
MadMaxPyro: Striker is quite resilient able to take some big beatings and stabbings but Dennis survived getting completely crushed by the boot of a diver who is giant compared to him and somehow regenerated from it after he was reduced to nothing but splattered goo. Striker would have quite the tough time taking him down when he has got durability like that.
Max: So that's really all there is to it...
MadMaxPyro: Wait! What about the whole holy weapons thing when it comes to Helluva Boss demons, I mean the creator herself even apparently said that any demon can't be killed without them, not just the royals so wouldn't Striker be more durable?
Max: Ah that, well you see other me Vivziepop may have said that but the show's writing i'snt consistent with this narrative. In fact it has been shown in two separate episodes that demons including imps (which Striker is) can be killed by normal means. In the "Harvest Moon Festival" Millie was scolded by her mother about causing the deaths of other imps while her own sister even dragged a body that she had killed past them. Then far more explicitly in "Exes and Ohs" Millie is straight up shown killing a whole group of shark demon mafia members even ripping one's skull out with just her sheer strength. Plus in Hazbin Hotel, a show that takes place in the same universe as Helluva Boss a demon was killed by getting run over by a car. Even if you want to believe her statement therefore implies that all these demons just came back to life later (which was never shown) and thus Striker would come back later this is still a victory for Dennis.
MadMaxPyro: Okay but what about Striker's holy weapons? Wouldn't they kill Dennis pretty easily?
Max: Well no, there's no reason to believe that as they are designed to be powerful against demon royalty and Dennis is an underwater fish. Sure, they'd damage him just as any guns and knives would but wouldn't be some specifically extra powerful ace in the hole to kill him not even the blessed rope since it has been shown it can be cut by knives like regular rope.
MadMaxPyro: Striker STRUCK out.
Max: The winner is Dennis.
