This is a what if Death Battle between the two immortal combatants Deadpool and “Voodoo” Vince.
Intro[]
If there’s a fate worse than death, it be stuck with someone that can’t die and is making your life a living hell.
Deadpool, the Merc with a Mouth.
And Vince, Madame Charmaine’s third best Voodoo doll.
I’m Tim Stefanich, and this will be my first death battle Fanon.
Deadpool[]
Wade Wilson started an early career as a mercenary for hire. Had a girlfriend, and enjoying a life as a free man. Then all that went downhill when he is diagnosed with terminal cancer. Being a man doomed to die, wade left his girlfriend, and took the chance of a lifetime. Becoming a superhero in the Weapon X program. But turns out, he was tricked into be a guinea pig used for experiments and mentally twisted. Implanted with Wolverines healing factor, Wade Wilson used his new found powers to break out of Weapon X and become the greatest troll of all time. DEADPOOL!!!
Background
- Real Name: Wade Winston Wilson
- AKA The Merc with a Mouth
- Height: 6'2"/1.88 m
- Weight: 210 lbs/95 kg
- Employed in U.S. Army by age 18
- Favorite Food: Chimichangas
- Knows he's a character in a fictional universe of any media
Abilities
- Healing Factor
- Rapidly heals wounds and regrows limbs, organs, bones and tissue.
- Increased strength and speed
- Enhanced reflexes
- Master-class martial artist
- Lethal with virtually any weapon
- And of course, Deadpool can break the fourth wall.
Weapons and Equipment
- Teleporter Belt
- Allows Deadpool to teleport short distances
- Occasionally prone to malfunction
- Magic Satchel
- Holds unlimited weapons and ammo
- Bends laws of physics and space
- Weapons
- Katana
- Sais
- Sledge Hammers
- Pistols
- Submachine Guns
- Shotguns
- Frag Grenades
- Pulse Rifles
- Carbondanium katana
- Can nullify the healing factor
- Stronger than steel
- Not durable as true adamantium, so it's cheaper
- His own mouth
Feats
- Defeated 100 ninjas while on the phone
- Pulled a rogue midair helicopter
- Regenerated his body from being a puddle, regrew his head, limbs and reattached his body back together.
- Defeated Wolverine, Taskmaster, Bullseye, Super Skrull, the Hulk, and...just about the entire Marvel universe.
- Fast enough to dodged point blank bullets. Even though they'll have no effect at all.
- Biggest opening weekend for an R-rated film ever ($132.7 million!)
Flaws
- Healing Factor isn't perfect, as it requires time and certain body parts need to be reattach.
- Even killing the marvel universe, required certain weapons to do so. As Deadpool needed the Carbondanium Sword in order to do so.
- Not to mention, Deadpool gets his ass kicked by Hulk and Thanos with total ease. Even Captain America knocked him out with a single punch.
- Though he's a skilled fighter, his arrogance is easily his major weakness. Giving a smart enough opponent to exploit his weakness or overpower with brute force.
Vince[]
Down south, in an old neighborhood, you will find Madame Charmaine’s Voodoo shop. The wise gypsy helps people thanks to her knowledge of zombie dust and her third best voodoo doll. But like any video game, something bad has to happen to the female. And it so happens Kosmo the inscrutable so happens to capture Madame Charmaine and her zombie dust.
Little knowing that unleashing the dust has warp the world around them, open portals to what appears to be hell and summoning evil creatures to plague our world. But fear not, for Madame Charmaine’s third best Voodoo Doll became afflicted by the zombie dust and arose to safe his boss and the world.
Background
- Height: 10 inches
- Weight: 20 lbs
- Race: Living Voodoo Doll
- Primary Occupation: Saving his boss, collecting zombie dust and kicking monsters butt.
- Has three pins in his head, and only one human like eye. (Still wondering what happened to his left eye)
- Madame Charmaine’s third best voodoo doll
Skills
- Spin Attack
- Double Jump
- Combine with the spin attack gives Vince an extended jump.
- Hover
- Swing Pin
- Allows Vince to swing across high areas
- All Seeing Eye
- Able to see through buildings, walls and floors, but only zombie dust and voodoo items.
Voodoo Powers
- Vince knows over 33 voodoo powers, it is possible he can perform more voodoo attacks.
- Pinhead
- Anvil Hat
- Chainsaw
- Acid bath
- Alien Attack
- Wrecking Ball
- Bomb
- Tornado
- Angry God
- 1930’s Mob Hit
- Meat Cleaver
- Piñata
Feats
- Destroyed the 1000 foot Kosmobot by crippling its legs, blowing its head off, and using his voodoo powers to destroy the brain.
- Survived a 715 ft drop, explosions, toy train crashes, being shredded by a giant fan, squashed, even electricuted. And he done those without activating, but amplifying his voodoo powers.
- Beat Crawdad Jimmy in a toy boat race.
- Defeated giant magical monsters against impossible odds
- Lifted up to 50 lbs.
- Collected all the Zombie Dust, Voodoo Pages and Voodoo icons.
- Saved Madame Charmaine, after he destroyed the Kosmobot.
Flaws
- Can't Swim
- Isn't invincible, as he can be harmed by magical creatures or attacks.
- His Voodoo Powers have limited range.
- Vince can't harm or destroy larger enemies with his Voodoo Power, he mostly requires the large environment to activate his voodoo power dealing twice the original damage.
- Does most of the work, but without Madam Charmaines guidence against bosses, he'll have to figure it out on himself. That doesn't mean he's a complete idiot, it just means he needs hints and suggestions on how to defeat his opponents.
Polls[]
DEATH BATTLE!!![]
In the slums of the Quarter, Vince is found running on the clock speeding up the time to open up a shop. After getting hit by the bell chime figure and falling down without a scratch, Vince walked it off to continue his task.
“Well that was pointless. So where is this combatant guy”?
As Vince guard is low, Kosmobot the Inscrewable appears laughing maniacally, “Foolish doll, you have fallen right into my trap. You may have beaten my monsters and foil my plans for world domination, but I have finally found a way to destroy you”.
Unimpressed, Vince replied, “So what, you haven’t had a good idea since 2004. Heck, I doubt you could come up with a better one now”.
“Shut up, you little…. You may be invincible, but I have searched the universe and finally found someone stronger and more powerful than you could ever be. BEHOLD!!!”, with a flash of lightning and the sound of a screaming man in red. Out pops Deadpool flatten on the ground.
“.... A Spider-Man cosplayer. You just find more ways to be the worst villain ever”.
Shaking off his wounds and cracking his neck, “Welp, we’re doing another fan death battle. Who’s the combatant”?
Looks down at the Voodoo doll and sighs, “Really? Alright let’s get started”.
Deadpool takes out his guns and shoots Vince in the head. “Well, that was easy. Time to get a drink and uhh, why am I blue? OWW!", Deadpool's head blows up in the form of a bullet hole. Healing from his wound, he stares at the doll.
Vince stands up and gives Deadpool a smug look. “Well, that'll give you a ringing in your head."
“What the? What are you? Aren’t you supposed to be a toy?”, Deadpool frantically questions the annoyed doll.
“I’m a voodoo doll ya twit, you can’t hurt me with your toys”.
Now angry, Deadpool pulls out various weapons, “We’ll see about that”. Firing all of his weapons at the doll from a pulse rifle to his bazookas, Deadpool will not stop until he vaporizes the little burlap sack.
Shocked by how many weapons he’s firing, Vince runs off taking cover. Under an endless barrage of explosions, flames and lasers, Deadpool ceases his attack and glares into the smoke.
Flying from the clouds is Vince and his plane. “YEEEEHAAAA”, he cheered.
“Oh bullshit, how did he even have an airplane”? Deadpool pulls out his missile launcher and fires it at Vinces plane. Evading the missiles by using his booster, and shooting his needle gun at the missiles, just dodging the explosions.
To end Deadpool’s barrage, Vince flies the plane at him and fires his needle gun. Flinching at the unknown ammunition, Deadpool realizes the ineffective needles only seem to be an annoyance. Smirking at it only distracts Vince true intention, crashing his plane into Deadpool causing a massive explosion.
The blast sends Vince screaming into a wall, flattening him. Getting back up, Vince looks over the remains, “Well, he had a blast”.
Deadpool meanwhile attaches himself back together, and glares at Vince with determination.
“So you’re immortal too huh, well look at it this way. You’re wearing red, at least no one can tell if you’re bleeding”.
“That’s my line, you stole my line from my movie you little shit”.
“Really? I was saying it cuz it’s generic and obvious”.
Enraged, Deadpool impales Vince and breaks him through multiple walls trying to kill the doll. Then Vince slices himself off the sword, then punches and spin attacks Deadpool repeatedly.
“Will. You. Stop. And. Die. All. Ready”!!!!
“You first”, Vince starts glowing blue, and a buzz saw slices Vince in half. Confused, Deadpool glows blue and falls in half cussing at the situation.
Vince poofs back together and walks away smiling. While, Deadpool puts himself back together. Literally.
“Hey asshole”, he shouts. “So you can heal yourself, huh? Well, I got something for that”. Vince turns around with an uninterested expression and waits for Deadpool’s next move.
“Carbondanium Sword, made specifically for killing annoying little dolls. Excluding yours truly”. Deadpool leaps over Vince, and before the decapitation Vince starts glowing blue and smiling as his head rolls off.
Sighing with relief, “Welp that’s that. Deadpool wins, yay! Roll credits, explain why, who cares, I’m gonna go and…..why can’t I feel my everything”? Deadpool’s collapses, leaving only the head intact. Then a familiar face walks over smiling as he picks up the decapitated head.
“NO! NO! NO! This is bullshit! How the fuck are you alive?! I’ve killed you! How is that possib-lblb-lblb-bbbbbbbbbb”, Vince throws the chatting head into the lake and looks at the camera one last time.
“I shouldn’t say it. It’s too obvious. But it feels wrong not to. He should’ve quit while he was a head……..god that was terrible. Who even was that guy, Spuderman? I don't remember him being a jerk.”
Conclusion[]
Before anyone starts complaining or saying I'm wrong, I would like to point out there are many instances where Deadpool could've won.
He could've used a magical weapon to physically harm Vince, however there didn't seem to be any tool from Deadpool's magic satchel. And Deadpool could've just kicked Vince into the lake since all Voodoo Dolls can't swim, however he didn't know Vince weakness and even if he could have figured it out, Vince outclassed him in more efficient ways to kill.
Being a voodoo doll, Vince had many ways to permanently kill Deadpool thanks to his zombie dust, which he had enough to kill giant monsters and mechs.
Now you're probably saying, but Tim, the carbonadium sword can nullify the healing factor, that should easily kill Vince. Not true, Vince can only be harmed by magic or magical creatures. And the carbonadium is described as a metal, nothing else.
Cheer up Deadpool, you just keep on rolling.
Winner[]
The Winner, is Vince
Next Time[]
PEPSI MAAAAAAAAAAN!!!