(This is a collab between Thebeeghungry and Duragoji123)
Stories on the Inside | |
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Season | N/A |
Season Episode | N/A |
Air date | TBA |
Written by | Duragoji123 Thebeeghungry |
Episode guide | |
Previous The Second Coming vs Akuto Sai |
Next N/A |
Intro[]
Super Mario Brothers VS Umineko: When They Cry! When these two ruthless dark reflections cut loose, who will lose their life and who will walk away to create another Inside Story?
Interlude[]
(Cue Wiz & Boomstick)
Triangle: Every great protagonist must have a villain, an antagonist that parallels them as their opposite.
Featherine: But there is one type of villain we all tend to love, the dark, brooding, and sometimes edgy reflection of the main hero. This is exactly what our two combatants today are.
Monke: Dark Bowser, the DNA-stealing Dark Star from Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story!
Dura: And Black Battler, the embodiment of the concept of Battler being Umineko's culprit. I'm Dura!
Triangle: I'm Triangle.
Monke: I'm Monke!
Featherine: And yours truly, the Witch of Theatergoing; it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who will win a DEATH BATTLE!
An Evil-er Bowser!? Say it ain't so! (Thebeeghungry)[]
(Cue: Final Castle)
Monke: Ah, the Mushroom Kingdom! Ruled by Princess Peach, terrorized by Bowser, and protected by the Mario Bros. What hasn't been said about this not-so-humble kingdom?
Triangle: Well, Monke, this Kingdom holds a dark secret, buried underneath Toad Town, lies an ancient evil, known as the Dark Star.
Monke: Ohhh boy, ya see, this weird lookin' thing landed in the Mushroom Kingdom long ago, and was said to be able to cause great destruction if it were to be found by an evil entity, and so, it was sealed away by the Star Spirits.
Triangle: From there, it would sleep for an extremely long time, however, one fateful day, it was woken up by an evil being known as Fawful, who planned to use the Dark Star's energy for ultimate power.
Monke: However, this weird ol' green bean needed Peach in order to wake up the Dark Star, and, sadly for him, the Koopa King himself, Bowser, had managed to reach Fawful just as the Dark Star was waking up, and thus, Bowser managed to sock Fawful in the face before he could suck up all of the Star's energy, only getting half.
Triangle: Sadly, half was all the Star needed to wake up and enter Bowser's body, eating his DNA and using it for itself, thus beginning to look a lot more like Bowser. However, it was only after sucking up Fawful that the Dark Star was made whole again, and assumed the form of Dark Bowser.
Monke: Wow, reaaalll creative name there, big N!
Dark Bowser's background[]
- Name: Dark Bowser
- Most other stuff: Unknown
- is just Bowser, but cooler.
(Cue: The Giant)
Monke: Obviously, the Dark Star was so much of a threat just because of a lame-ass-hell name, they've got a buncha powers! They can clone themselves, send out these little minions called Dark Satellmites, shoot giant friggin' lasers, attack your own shadows, and eat DNA to assimilate it into itself!
Triangle: And that's just as the Star itself, Dark Bowser has all the staple abilities of the regular Koopa King, spitting fire, Punching, curling up into a spike ball, and inhaling things. However, they also can create Dark Cages that even the mighty Bowser struggles to break out of, Shoot energy balls of Darkness, barf out a giant tornado that can trap people in dark bubbles, chuck giant boulders around, and even revive after death, which also makes him giant AND gives him the ability to chuck out an army of dark minions!
Monke: On that inhaling, if he inhales you, you'll be met with the Dark Star Core, this thing is an amalgamation of the Dark Star and Fawful, turning it into this strange monster that can fly (sorta), shoot energy balls through it's arms, fire energy rings through the core itself, shoot giant lasers, and use this Dark Spear thingie that it can spin across the ground, before firing at you!
Popup: It is worthy to note that this attack was replaced with Dark Orbs of sorts instead in the remake.
Dark Bowser's abilities[]
- High Stats
- Cloning
- Shadow manipulation
- Lasers
- Minions
- Dark Tornado
- Fire Breath
- Inhaling
- Boulder
- Reviving
- Dark Spear
- various Dark Energy attacks
(Cue: The Grand Finale)
Triangle: But this evil-er Koopa isn't a threat just because he has a few abilities, he's pretty strong too! the Dark Star, even with only half it's power, could trade blows with Mario & Luigi, who defeated Dreamy Bowser, who had control over an infinite amount of Dream Worlds! Not only this, but the Bros. have also shown to be able to move through the infinite Mario universe on starship Mario!
Dark Bowser's feats[]
- Can matchup with Mario & Luigi
- Created a storm that went across the entire Mushroom Kingdom
- Traded blows with Bowser
Monke: However, Dark Bowser was eventually defeated thanks to the combined effort of the Bros. taking out the Core, allowing Bowser to finish off Dark Bowser, thus ending his short-lived reign of terror.
Triangle: However, even in this short time, Dark Bowser made his mark as one of the most threatening villains in the Marioverse, and we better hope he never returns.
"Soon, this Kingdom will vanish along with all who dwell within. And you, too, will sleep eternally in the dark power's embrace!"
It was Battler who Killed the Ushiromiya Family!!! (Duragoji123)[]
(Cue Majo to Suiri no Rondo)
Dura: The year is 1986, and the island of Rokkenjima is one you would not expect to have any strange happenings. Though, the island's gentle breeze and the cry of the umineko (seagulls) belies the true nature of the lone landmass.
Featherine: For on that island, a tale of a witch was passed down by the Ushiromiya's, a family which had risen from its former questionable financial state and into an era of economic boom. It was the day of their annual family conference, and they were looking to divide the dying family head's inheritance among themselves, like vultures circling their prey.
Dura: Though, perhaps the legend of the witch wasn't such a legend after all. 'Cuz supposedly, they say that on that day, the Golden Witch returned and carried out a bunch of murders on the family!
Featherine: Ufufu, well, that is but one interpretation. Actually, there existed far more explanations for the tragedy that occurred on Rokkenjima, denying a supernatural explanation of witches and magic in favor of a more scientific interpretation.
Dura: Yeah, see, after the news of what happened to the Ushiromiya family hit mainline Japan, the Rokkenjima massacre quickly gained traction with the mystery authors of the time, with my dear Auau here being one of those authors. At least... an avatar of her was... I don't know, this shit gets kinda confusing some times ngl.
Featherine: Everyone's interpretations of the events varied from account to account, from the entire thing being a cover-up for some greater conspiracy; to the servants that served under the family being responsible; and even to the point many took the legend of the Golden Witch and ran it into the ground. Though, perhaps one of the most intriguing interpretations would be that it was all carried out by one 'Battler Ushiromiya', who grew to resent his family over his time spent away from them upon a falling-out.
Black Battler's Background[]
- True Identity: "Forgery no.XXX" / "Black Interpretation of Battler Based On the Battler Culprit Theory"
- Age: 18 (Same as Battler)
- Gender: Male
- Embodiment of the "Battler Culprit Theory"
- Supposedly created by Bernkastel
- Psychotic murderer
- Likes: "Everything you hate."
- Dislikes: "Being stared at... I hate that look in your eyes..."
(Cue Hour of Darkness)
Dura: The bizarre "Black Battler" was an absolute menace. He was unstable, and his family knew this... it's just too bad for them that they noticed too late. Along with his parents, Rudolf and Kyrie, Battler murdered the rest of the family, and by twilight not one was left alive.
Featherine: But... this is not the end of our tale. Though to normal humans the Rokkenjima massacre was a complete mystery, the truth was far more supernatural, unexplainable. The entire tragedy was a game played between by Ushiromiya Battler and the Golden Witch herself, Beatrice, with the island as their game board. Each game board is comprised of squares, white and black, which represent the human world and magical world respectively.
Dura: And most of the really cool stuff happens in the black squares! Some of my favorite examples include classic magic tricks such as summoning lightning out of nowhere, erecting towers to look down on the lowly peasants, or fucking killing people left and right by blowing 'em up from the inside! Small bombs, guys, small bombs.
(Cue Death from Stupefaction)
Featherine: Though, once Black Battler was released into the world, all bets were off. After being welcomed into the Golden Land - the realm of Rokkenjima's witch - by Beatrice's butler Ronove, Black Battler promptly brutally murdered the butler. As you do, when your entire existence is made to be entertainment for those of a higher position (such as myself!).
Dura: Here's where shit gets meta boys; this anti-Battler was actually created by an enemy witch of Beatrice and Battler named Frederica Bernkastel, who was looking to take the board to appease her master's boredom. Just who was this master, you may ask? Well, it was of course none other than-
Featherine: -Me!
Dura: As long as 'Blackler' did what was the most entertaining, he was basically free to do anything he wanted. And when you've got the wacky powers someone like him does, you're basically unstoppable!
Black Battler's Weapons/Powers[]
- Rifles
- Magic
- Black Forgeries
- Purple Statements
- Summoning (of Rudolf and Kyrie Ushiromiya)
- Rapturous Gouging
- Massacre
- Endless Nine
Featherine: Like all beings of the Meta-World, a higher plane of reality in which us witches spectate the lowly lives of humans, the dark Battler can use Truth statements. These 'statements' are declarations of your own interpretation of events, and they draw from the 'catbox' of the game board. Essentially, every infinite possibility, both plausible and implausible, exists at once as both reality and fiction at once; by calling on the power of a Truth statement, one can either declare their interpretation as fact with Red, or counter that interpretation with Blue. Although, with a Red Truth, you are incapable of fully lying. For instance...
Instantly, Dura is afflicted with the Truth. However, he smirked before he snapped his fingers and pointed forwards.
Dura emerges just fine, as Featherine giggles amusedly to herself.
Featherine: Ufufu... you still have the hang of it. I'm impressed, Dura.
Dura: Of course! It's so fun being able to go back and forth with you like this! Though, for Black Battler, these statements are just a bit different.
(Cue Eternal Chains)
Featherine: Correct; Black Battler, as he is the murderer of his game board, can use a special truth designed by Bernkastel for the game that Lord Battler and Lady Beatrice eventually end up playing against the both of them. This is Purple, a statement that is of a similar function to the Red, but in that the user is capable of lying during it.
Dura: He also has a parallel to the Blue Truth as well, in the form of Black Forgeries; they take the form of purple stakes which he can toss and stab into people to inflict the statement onto them.
Featherine: Though, the twisted Ushiromiya is not solely limited to magical attacks, for he can also take advantage of a witch's greatest weakness: the science of human ingenuity. That, of course, coming in the form of rifles for him, which he has a whole collection of to give to either Rudolf or Kyrie.
Dura: Then there's "Rapturous Gouging", which takes an even darker turn on perhaps Battler's most vile move... GROPING CHESTS! ...he never pulled anything like that on you, right Auau..?
Featherine: No, no, of course not, he got character development over his game with Beatrice. Well, the same can't be said for his black counterpart, as instead of using the technique for naughty activities, he uses it to ram his hands into you and tear out your organs. Quite fitting!
Dura: You mean disturbing... but yeah, it's pretty fitting for someone like him, since with a technique called 'Massacre' the dude can literally heal wounds! This healing factor is useful, when he's going up against Meta-World beings such as his normal self.
Black Battler's Feats[]
- Broke out of his own narrative, declaring that he wanted to kill his author
- Killed the Forgery no.XXX versions of the Ushiromiya's
- Fought and killed Ronove
- Proved to be a challenge to both Battler and Beatrice, even when working together
- Capable of fighting Battler, Beatrice, Bernkastel, Lambdadelta, etc.
(Cue The End of the World)
Featherine: He's fought against the likes of Battler and Beatrice across numerous forgeries, and even managed to kill Meta-World entities such as Ronove with his bare hands. This is impressive, as we as "Meta-Beings" exist above things like concepts and can recover from just about anything.
Dura: The guy has also fought against Bernkastel - his own master - and proved to be a threat to the entire game board itself. Yeah, that's right, this reflection of a normal ass guy, all things considered, fought against a witch who could create big bangs and black holes in battle with another witch - Lambdadelta - like nothing!
Featherine: Quite. However, all entertainment must eventually come to an end, and it was Black Battler's time to take his leave. Though he was a threat temporarily, soon enough there was no trace of him left, with the might of Battler and Beatrice standing against him being too strong. He was denied out of existence with a simple Red Truth, and left just as suddenly as he arrived. Perhaps a fitting end, for a child of man living in the literal shadow of the protagonist.
Dura: But beware; if you find yourself in the world of witches and magic, do not journey too far from your game board. Because it's likely Black Battler still lurks out there, somewhere... lying in wait for his time to enter the spotlight once again. And when he revives, none will survive.
Black Battler: Those merciless people will gather one after the other, and create forgeries like us... Do you understand? Even if "you" don't write any more about us, we continue to live. Are you watching, Tohya? Try to stop me soon. Try to stop this farce!!
Pre-Fight[]
Triangle and Dura: Alright, the combatants are set, and we've run the data through all possibilities!
Monke: It's time for a DEATH BATTTLEEEE!!
*DB Doors Close*
(Cue Devil's Curse)
The large towers of Princess Peach Toadstool's castle buckled under the weight of the conflict which was occurring inside. The Mushroom Kingdom was overrun with darkness, and nothing could escape the black fires of hell as the countless minions waged war on the entire land. However, as previously mentioned, there was a struggle within the castle's walls.
A monstrous dark entity known only as Dark Bowser looked on as its minions were mercilessly killed off one-by-one, effortlessly. The one behind the slaughter let out a maddened cackle, as he burst through the army like butter. The more humanoid combatant rolled his shoulders, as he stared towards the dark turtle-dragon-thing.
Black Battler grinned maliciously, as he popped his knuckles. He was dressed like a royal madman, the image of a golden eagle was placed against the outfit, which underlined the evil Battler's murderous intent, contrasting against Dark Bowser's direct devilish appearance.
Dark Bowser: GWAHAHAHAHA! You've done well thus far, pipsqueak! But you'll fall when you get a taste of my power!
Black Battler: Tch... heheh, I've come this far, turtle. I will take over this gameboard, and subject it to termination.
The negative reflection of the Koopa King merely chortled, as he hopped down from his throne. He stared towards the Ushiromiya family's killer, before hitting his opened palm with a punch, readying for combat.
Dark Bowser: Gameboard? Pssh, please... you're gonna make me laugh! No no no... Mr. Fancypants, this kingdom is MINE to overthrow!
Black Battler: Then come get me...
Dark Bowser roared, as he dashed in at Black Battler. Though, the evil Ushiromiya also dashed in, leaping up into the air as the avatar of the Dark Star did the same. The two evil entities reared back for a punch, before extending their fist forward as they clashed.
FIGHT![]
K.O![]
Results[]
Trivia[]
- The connections between Dark Bowser and Black Battler are as follows:
- Radical dark reflections of the main protagonist of their respective story (Bowser and Battler), who are based off of them but at the same time extremely different.
- They were created from an outside source (The Dark Star and Forgery no.XXX) and are used by the main antagonists of the story (Fawful and Bernkastel) who in turn serve a higher mistress (Cackletta and Featherine). These masters are also witches.
- They take on similar appearances to Bowser and Battler respectively, but are tainted to the point they become mockeries of them.
- They're both inherently supernatural in nature, with their true existence harkening back to a mystery/story (The Dark Star being a mysterious star that was found under the Mushroom Kingdom with a prophecy tied to it that it would one day ravage the world; Black Battler being a result of the many answers as to what actually happened on Rokkenjima, placing Battler as the culprit).
- Despite their extremely fantastical worlds, they seem to use a lot of "normal" weaponry (Dark Bowser using things like hammers and spike balls in a lot of his attacks; Black Battler using shotguns). However, in addition to this, they also possess abilities reminiscent of their original selves though with a dark twist (Dark Bowser having dark versions of all of Bowser's minions and also a dark fire breath; Black Battler having Black Forgeries and Purple Declarations in contrast to Battler's Truth statements).
- A good bit of their attacks involve the aid of others who are also corrupted by darkness (Dark Bowser's minions; Black Battler summoning Rudolf and Kyrie).
- They encountered in a stormy and dark reflection of a formerly lively rich man's paradise (Dark Bowser casting a hurricane of darkness over the Mushroom Kingdom; the Meta-World version of Rokkenjima being where Black Battler is confronted by Beatrice).
- Despite their power, however, they are defeated in dramatic and flashy ways by an antagonist-turned-main character (Bowser kills Dark Bowser by punching him so hard that both him and the Dark Star explode; Beatrice wipes Black Battler out of existence with a declaration that Battler can't be the culprit).
- Despite their relative popularity in their fandoms, they actually appear very sparsely in their series and are mostly only exclusive to a final boss fight.