Dan Mandel Vs Dale Gribble is one of Pure King of Rage's Death Battles.
Description[]
Dan Mandel Vs King of the Hill: Two crazy conspiracy theorists that love getting revenge and gets their friends involve into their crazy ideas and schemes.
Intro[]
They say that revenge is a dish best severed immediately and nothings says revenge like these two characters.
- Dan Mandel the Seeker of Vengeance.
- And Dale Gribble, the conspiracy crazed lunatic and Hank Hill's Best Friend.
I'm Pure King of Rage and It's My Job to analyze their Weapons, Armor, and Skills to find out who would win a Death battle.
Dan Mandel[]
Once upon a time in the city called Los Angles California, There lived a short angry man who had one thing on his mind: Revenge and his name was Dan.
Bio[]
- Age: 27
- Aliases: Dan Man, Bat Boy, Biff wellington
- Occupation: Unknown
- Pets: Mr. Mumbles
Born and Raised in Los Angles California to abusive parents and while Dan's childhood is a mystery to the viewers and others, hints of it from the series made it sound pretty bad and possibly gruesome. Dan never had that many friends and sometime later his parents forced him to join a corrupted summer camp for boys. It was there he befriended Chris and he became his only friend into adulthood. It was that point on Dan's life gotten stranger and more aggressive, and over the years he has gotten more angry and grown to hate everything. With his best friend Chris and his wife Elise, Dan when on a lifetime journey of Revenge.
Feats[]
- Defeated New Mexico
- Froze Canada
- Escaped a Haunted Graveyard
- Got his imposter thrown in jail
- Outsmarted and Defeated a Demon
- Defeated a Superman like hero
- Defeated a Robot version of himself
- Nearly Started World War 3 just to kill a squirrel
Despite being just a ordinary being, Dan revenge streak has a history of succeeding and some of which wouldn't been have been possible without help Chris and Elise and some he had accomplish on his own. Also Dan has an assortment of weapons and skills that had helped him pull through some of these feats.
Weapons and Skills[]
- Axe
- Brass Knuckles
- Chainsaw
- Fight Dancing
- Crossbow
- Dentist Bear
- Lighter
- Baseball bat
He has Brass knuckles that can pierce through skin, an axe that can chop down trees and can crack a skull, and he has this thing call fight dancing, which involves fighting and dancing, and he learned this technique from an old man, while trapped in an deserted city full of mindless dance crazed zombies... yeah this really happen.
While all this may seem impressive, Dan in reality is a jerk and He also has his faults as well.
Weaknesses[]
- Doesn't do well against Guns or Stabbing weapons
- Lactose Intolerance
- He can make terrible decisions
- Doesn't Know when to quit
- Can be easily knock out despite durability
- Can be subdued by stronger opponents
- Will put his life on the line if it means getting revenge.
Dan is extremely childish and while he may be the ultimate seeker of vengeance, his revenge schemes take a lot effort and planning, some of his revenge schemes were accomplish by dumb luck and some wouldn't be possible if didn't had help. He's very stubborn, sometimes doesn't take things seriously, and is quick to anger.
Despite this Dan is an extremely risk taker and is the ultimate revenge maker and if something angers him, he won't stop until he gets his revenge.
Elise: Anybody want anything?
Dan: Only my sweet, sweet revenge! And maybe some peanut brittle.
Dale Gribble[]
King of the Hill is a sitcom about a guy named Hank Hill who uses his wit to get through certain scenarios.
But however this Death Battle isn't about Hank Hill, no This battle is about his next door neighbor Dale Gribble. You see The main character is not always Hank Hill. In several episodes, Dale Gribble was the main character. You see, Dale, unlike Hank, is not that intelligent. This is proven with his ridiculous conspiracy theories.
Dale: Objection conjecture! Objecture! My conspiracy theories are canon!
Yeah sure they are Dale, heh heh.... Not!
Dale: Hey!
Anyway Dale Gribble has been an exterminator for about 22 years. If he has his poison, he REALLY knows how to use it to kill anything, even a horse and In one episode, he was doomed to die before the age of 50 if he kept using it.
But He still used the poison after that episode, and never died. He Probably could've developed an Resistant or antibody to it or something.
Dale has also been a gun club president for about 14 years. His aim is really good, but when encountering foes who look stronger than him, he cowardly misses his shots.
He is also known to keep guns in his basement.
Dale: I have oodles of them.
These guns are revolvers, glocks, rifles and other guns. He also carries guns with him. He keeps three glocks inside his shirt. He also carries knives, ninja stars and one other weapon with him. Even with all these weapons, he is in fact, very agile.
Dale: POCKET SAND!
Ahh My Eyes I CAN'T SEE!!!!! Damn it Dale What was that for?!
Dale: That's pay back for saying my conspiracies weren't canon!
(Washes the sand off with water from a bottle) Sorry about that, Anyway He uses pocket sand as a surprise attack for any enemy with their eyes exposed. Then he can steal an item such as a briefcase, or even a weapon. Even if he has no weapons, he is still good at fighting.
Dale: TURBINE!!!!!
That's it Dale, Get out of here before I have Hank Hill Kick your Ass.
Dale: *Gulp* Whatever I got some Planning to do before the next battle.
(Dale leaves the room)
Glad that's over with. Moving on He used his own fists and body to kill about a hundred roaches. The rest, he killed with regular office supplies. Despite being easily weakened when intimidated, I wouldn't recommend putting up a fight with him.
Dale: You Keep this up Joseph, you're Fired from this Family!
Nancy: Dale!
Dale: You're Next Blondie.
Nancy: *Gasp*
Intermission[]
Alright the combatants are set, I'm going to end this debate once and for all.
It's time for a Death Battle!
Pre Fight[]
One sunny afternoon in Los Angles California, Dan was sitting on his couch watching TV. Everything was calm, nothing extraordinary was going to happen to day.... Until he heard a loud noise coming from outside.
Dan: "What is All that Ruckus?! Can't these people see I'm trying to watch Television!"
Dan exits his apartment and heads onto the balcony. He looks around and sees that a white truck with a giant fake queen ant on it had crashed right into his Car.
"My Car!" Shouted Dan in shock. "Who did this?!" he asked.
Dan looks towards the side of the truck and it reads: Dale's Dead Bug.
Dan gritted his teeth, raises his fists into the air, and shouts: Dale!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dan
Vs
Dale Gribble
Just then Dale exits his truck, holding his head. Ugh... "Did someone said my Name?" He asked.
"You!" Shouted Dan.
Dale turns around and sees a short angry man waking towards him.
"You're the jerk-face who wrecked my Car! Who do you think you are?!" shouted Dan.
Dale looks at wrecked car, inspected it, and turns towards Dan. "Yeah Sorry about that, I must've have dose off, you see I'm on a mission to find out....
"I don't need to hear your excuses! Either you pay for what've you done or this could get ugly!" Shouted Dan interrupting Dale.
Dale pulls out his wallet and take's out a coupon. "You take Coupons?" he asked.
Dan facepalms. "That it's your going down punk!" shouted Dan as he puts on his brass knuckles.
Dale gulps in fear "Fine you want to fight? Then let's us battle!" shouted Dale as he pulls out a Knife.
Fight!
Fight[]
Dan rushes towards Dale, and throws a punch at him. But Dale ducks the punch and tries to slash at Dan with his knife. Dan blocks the attack using his brass knuckles, and punches Dale straight in the face with them, causing him to drop his knife. Dale tries to grab his knife, but Dan kicks it away, Worried Dale reaches into his pocket and grabs a handful of sand.
“Pocket sand!” shouted Dale as he throws the sand into Dan’s eyes. “Gah! My eyes, I can’t see!” shouted Dan.
With Dan distracted Dale retreated into his van, starts the engine, drives off, just as Dan got the sand off his eyes. “Hey! Get back here!” shouted Dan. Dan went into his car and starts the engine, despite it being wrecked, the front was still intact and was still functional.
Dale was driving as fast as he could, sighing in relief that he escape, But he spoked to soon when he felt a something ram into the back of his van. Dale looks at his rear view mirror and face turned to pure shock, when he saw Dan driving in his car. “You won’t escape from me that easily punk!” shouted Dan as Ram his vehicle into Dale’s van again. Dale glares and speeds his van up some more, But Dan however was catching up to him. Panicked Dale then reaches into his glove compartment and pulls out a Gun, he points it out the window and begins fired it towards Dan’s Car. Dan manages to dodge the bullets being fired at him by sliding to right.
"Oh yeah? Two play at that game pal!" shouted Dan as he begins to search his glove compartment for something he can use to throw at Dale. He then finds a paintball gun with a laser pointer on it. "I didn't know I still had this." he said.
Dan then points the gun out the window towards Dale's van, waiting for the right moment to fire, and at that moment Dale sticks his head out the window and points his gun towards Dan. "Ready....Aim...Now!" They Both said in union as they fired both of their weapons at the same time, the paintball from Dan's gun hit Dale's glasses and bullet from Dale's gun hit Dan's front tire. "My eyes! I can't see! Aah!" shouted Dale as he accidently took his hands off the wheel, and ended up crashing into a Department store. "Ha! Take that punk!" laughed Dan. Dan stops laughing and looks outside his window, and sees that his front tire is damage from the bullet. "That's not a good sign" he said. Suddenly Dan's car started to spiral out of control, and he crashing into the same Department store that Dale crashed into. Dan and Dale exit their vehicles, holding their heads groaning. They both glare at each other and get into a combat stance. Dan tackles Dale to the ground, starts wrestling the crap out of each other, Dale manages to shove Dan off of him and runs off into a different section of the store.
"Hey get back here!" shouted Dan. Dan chases after Dale, Dale enter an aisle full of hunting rifles. "Hmmm.... what to choose, what to choose." said Dale as he was tapping his chin. Dale picks up a red one, loads it with ammo, and leaves the aisle to find Dan. Dan on the other hand, just happen to be right outside the aisle looking for Dale. "Where is that creepo!" shouted Dan. "Hey!" shouted Dale. Dan turns around and sees a gun pointed towards him. "Eat bullets!" shouted Dale as he fired several bullets towards Dan. Dan barely dodges the bullets and runs behind a display stand. As he hides, Dan turns to his left and sees a display of axes on sale, he grabs one, and waits for the right moment to use it.
Dale stops firing his rifle for a minute and calls out to Dan. "Come out and face me like a Man!" shouted Dale. Dan comes out from his hiding place and pulls out his axe. "Eat this!" shouted Dan as he hurls the axe towards Dale. Dale ducks the attack and the axe hits a propane tank. "Ha! you miss!" taunted Dale. Dale then looks around and sees that Dan is no longer at his hiding spot. "Where did he...... Arghh!" Dale was suddenly interrupted by a kick to the face, which caused him to drop his rifle. "Let's Dance!" shouted Dan as he got into his fight dancing pose. Dale tackles Dan to the ground and gets into a fighting struggle with each other.
While the two were fighting neither of them seem to notice the leaking propane tank, which then exploded and cause all the other propane tanks to explode too. The entire building started to shake and falling apart and everyone (Except for Dan and Dale) ran out of the building in time, just as it exploded.
After the explosion, Dan emerges from the rubble, covered in bruises and dirt, and dusts himself off. "Well glad that's over with." said Dan. Just as Dan was about to walk off, Dale suddenly tackles him to the ground again. Dan tries to fight him off, but Dale was too strong. "Thought I was dead didn't you? Well i'm not!" shouted Dale. Dale then reaches into his pouch on leg hidden under his pants and pulls out another knife. "Say hello to my good friend Cotton Hill." said Dale as raises the knife preparing to stike. Dan panicked, he looks to his right and sees a carton of milk, he grabs it, and throws it in Dale's face. Dale screams and Dan shoves Dale off of him, he notices a crossbow on the ground next to him and picks it up.
Dale finishes wiping the milk off his face and looks around for his prey. "Hey four eyes!" shouted Dan. Dale turns and sees Dan holding a crossbow pointing towards him. "Say hello to my grandmother!" shouted Dan as he fires an arrow at Dale. With no time to dodge the arrow struck Dale right in his chest, Dale falls to ground wheezing in pain as Dan walk towards him and delivers the final blow, strucking Dale right in the face, killing him instanly. "Ha! Vengeance thy name is Dan!" shouted Dan. K.O!
Aftermath[]
Dan leaves the scene in a stolen car, while Dale's Dead body is being loaded into an ambulance.
Results[]
Man that was brutal and awesome, I like it. Anyway while Dale may have had the arsenal advantage, but Dan triumphs this by being smarter, faster and more durable.
In terms of Physical Strength, while Dale can bench presses up to 35 pounds in weight, Dan on the other had pushed over a giant christmas tree, can pick up his friend chris who weights 220 pounds, and his teeth are strong enough to bite through metal.
In Terms of Speed, While Dale has outran bees, Dan has outran an avalance, dodged laser fire, and outran a giant broccoli monster.
In terms of Intelligence, while both Dan and Dale have had made crazy and terrible decisions and ideas, Dan however is much smarter than Dale. His revenge plots actually have a good track record of succeeding, he more creative in battle, and had outsmarted a Demon. Dale on the other hand had not shown that much intelligence.
And last but not least, While Dale's pocket sand did come in handy, but it wasn't enough to keep Dan in bay.
You Know I always knew Dale was that much of an arrow head, when it comes to Battle.
The Winner is Dan.
Advantages and Disadvantages[]
Dan-Winner[]
- +Stronger
- +Far Smarter
- +Faster
- +More Durable
- -Less of an arsenal
- -Pocket sand was hard to see coming
Dale Gribble-Loser[]
- -Weaker
- -Dumber
- -Slower
- -Wasn't as Durable
- +More of an Arsenal
- +Pocket Sand proved handy