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2nd Death Battle by GetSkadooshed in season 2 (Hope you enjoy)

DC'sStrangeVillainsDBRemake

Description[]

A battle royale between some of DC's strangest and weirdest supervillains.

Intro[]

Wiz: DC has some of the most popular and iconic supervillains in fictional history. Such as the incredibly intelligent Lex Luthor, the insane physcopath JokerDarkseid the New God, and more. 

Boomstick: And then you have the weird villains at the bottom of the bucket. 

Wiz: Like Kite Man, the terror of Gotham's skies. 

Boomstick: Condiment King, the villain obssessed with condiments.

Wiz: Catman, the professional jungle cats hunter.

Boomstick: Fisherman, master of fishing. 

Wiz: Polka-Dot Man, the polka-dot themed criminal.

Boomstick: Snowflame, the cocaine powered maniac.

Wiz: Animal-Vegetable-Mineral Man, the supervillain with the longest name I've ever seen

Boomstick: And Blue Snowman, a woman dressed as a snowman. 

Wiz: I'm Wiz and he's Boomstick, and we are going to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win.

Boomstick: In a Death Battle! 

Kite-Man (Hell Yeah!)[]

Wiz: Charles Brown was a- 

Boomstick: Wait Charles Brown, do people also call him Charlie Brown? 

Wiz: Yes, in fact they did Boomstick. As I was saying Charles Brown as a young boy was fascinated by kites. He would soon grow up to become an engineer that specialized in aerodynamics. 

Boomstick: I can see where this is going... 

Wiz: Charles did make himself known when he designed and built the Jokermobile. But fame has its faults. He was hunted by Batman and caught himself in the middle of a gang war between Gotham supervillains: The Joker and Riddler, who both had their own teams of other supervillains consisting of Killer Croc, Deadshot, Mr. Freeze, Penguin, and more. 

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Boomstick: Batman threatened Charles to work as his spy for the Joker, the Joker wanted Charles to do the same thing except spy on the Riddler. In the end Riddler discovered Charles' plans and killed his son, Charles Brown Jr. by poisoning the string on the kite which the boy was playing around with. Damn, what a tragic backstory for a ridiculous super villain! 

Wiz: Charles went insane and longed for revenge, so he designed a hanglider suit and came up with the name: Kite Man. Later officially joining Joker's team in the Gang-War.

Boomstick: He also had his own catchphrase, "HELL YEAH!" Kite Man was considered a joke to the rest of the villains despite his technological skills. 

Wiz: After many battles it was revealed that it was Riddler's plan all along to drive Chuck to insanity because he believed Chuck was weak willed enough to give away the Joker's location. This plan was unsuccessful. Ultimately, Charles teamed up with Batman and defeated Riddler by tricking his team into wearing rigged designed gliders that forced them to fly into the Bat-Blimp. After the war, Chuck became an Arkham Asylum inmate and was unable to regain his sanity. Yikes... 

Boomstick: Kiteman would go on to have many "interesting" adventures including thrown off of Wayne Tower without his kite by Deathstroke because he refused to join the new Secret Society of Super Villains, was interrogated by Swamp Thing, and even became a love interest for Poison Ivy. 

Wiz: Kiteman carries kite themed weapons and gadgets. First, are his hang gliders that enables him to soar the skies of Gotham City. He has a jet powered glider, a smaller glider that is activated with a button on his suit, an ordinary glider, and a giant kite the size of a plane. 

Boomstick: He has kites that detonate explosions, nerve gas, fireworks kites, a flash bulb kite to blind enemies, a net kite, and has gas bombs, and a pistol. 

Wiz: Kiteman has been brave enough to go up against Batman, Hawkman, Plastic Man, and Aquaman. And lost to all of them... He did almost beat the Riddler once. 

Boomstick: He's a pretty tough son of a bitch too. He actually survived the fall from Wayne Tower, took a beating from venom infused Bane, and got up after smashing through a glass ceiling and landing on the ground hard. Now that I think about it they should make him a character for Injustice 3. Make him the Dan Hibiki of the game. 

Wiz: Never going to happen Boomstick. 

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Harley Quinn Kite Man Character Intro DC Universe

Condiment King (Mitchell Mayo)[]

Wiz: Before he was Condiment King, Mitchell Mayo-

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Boomstick: Mitchell Mayo? As in mayonnaise... Haha funny JOKE. 

Wiz: Mitchell Mayo was originally some random fast food worker gone insane and decided to attack a bunch of innocent people in a train station. Later going up against Batman's sidekicks: Robin and Batgirl. He was pretty easily defeated and sent to Arkham Asylum. 

Boomstick: During his time at Arkham, Mitchell dubbed himself Condiment King and gained a deep hatred for prison food... Oh and Robin and Batgirl. 

Wiz: Mitchell would also happen to stumble upon Poison Ivy who taught him more about plants and vegetables, enabling him to create more effective weapons out of condiments. He later escaped Arkham Asylum multiple times and then be defeated by the likes of Batman, Robin solo, and the Birds of Prey. 

Boomstick: He fought the Birds of Prey!?

Wiz: He lost rather easily Boomstick. Condiment King carries dual condiment guns that squirts a variety of sauces like ketchup, mustard, and relish. He can squirt them either as a spray or single shots. 

Boomstick: I don't see why people are afraid of him. What are condiments going to do to you. 

Wiz: Well, his condiment guns could cause blindness and anaphylactic shock. Anaphylactic shock causes your immune system to release a flood of chemicals that can cause you to go into shock. Your blood pressure suddenly drops and your airways narrow, blocking breathing. Symptoms include rapid, weak pulse, a skin rash, nausea and vomiting.

Boomstick: Um ok, during some of his "evil" plans, Condiment King encountered the Joker who infected him with a special toxin that instead  of killing him enhanced his intelligence. Thanks to the toxin and Ivy's lessons he would upgrade his arsenal and weapons. His cannons now shoot corrosive acids, he carries mustard gas bombs, and created the Scoville bomb. The Scoville bomb lets out gases of super spicy air, making breathing impossible for anyone unluckly enough to be in it.

Wiz: The Scoville scale is a measurement of the spiciness or "heat" of chili peppers, as recorded in Scoville Heat Units (SHU). He created a way to increase the spiciness of his condiment's flavor up to 100,000 on the Scoville Scale, which is 10 times hotter than a regular full jalapeño pepper which is only 10,000 Scoville units on the scale. 

Boomstick: He's basically firing Habanero chilis or wasabi sauces into your face.

Wiz: His cannons fire the strongest superacid known to mankind, Fluoroantimonic Acid which melts through metal and flesh in seconds, reacts explosively to water, and can only be stopped by PTFE also known as Polytetrafluoroethylene.

Boomstick: Yay sciencey stuff... Anyway where did he get all of these upgrades?

Wiz: Condiment King met General Immortus who was planning on creating an army made up of super villain losers. Condiment King joined and as a result he and all the other villains had their powers improved by Professor Achilles Milo. However, two members, the Human Flame and the Seductress betrayed General Immortus and ended up killing some of the other villains, Condiment King included. 

Boomstick: He was killed after being bludgeoned by his own ketchup and mustard guns. What a way to go...

Wiz: Condiment King's cannons are strong enough to launch a human being across a room and they can melt through large metal with ease.

Boomstick: He had his nose blasted off and still kept fighting. In the end he somehow outlived all of his teammates during the battle with Human Flame and the Seductress. 

Wiz: He's a weird character, but he tries his best. 

Condiment_King

Condiment King

Catman[]

Wiz: In Gotham City, Batman has faced many different super villains.

Boomstick: Like evil counterparts: Killer Moth, Wraith, Prometheus, Owlman, etc.

Wiz: Don't forget Thomas Blake aka the Catman. He started out as a world famous trapper of jungle cats until he turned to crime after growing bored of hunting and wasting his millions. 

Boomstick: So he turned to burglary. Makes perfect sense. 

Thomas Blake Prime Earth 0004

Wiz: Thomas committed his crimes by wearing a catsuit that looked like a combination of Catwoman and Batman's suits. 

Boomstick: For his weapon of choice Thomas wore a pair of steel clawed gloves, perfect for slashing through people and obstacles. He also wears his own utility belt around his waist where he can throw catarangs. Oh and he has a pet siberian tiger named Rasputin, which he trained to help him commit crimes. However, the most interesting part in his arsenal is his orange African cloth cape, which he claims is powered by a mystical force that can restore mortal wounds. A cape that gives him "nine lives". 

Wiz: Later on, Thomas joins two supervillain teams, The Misfits led by Killer Moth and the Secret Six led by Monsieur Mallah.  It didn't last long and he eventually outcasted himself to Africa where he attempted to get his old life back by living in the wilderness with lions. 

Boomstick: This also didn't last long as it would be shattered by the arrival of the Secret Society of Super Villains. Seeking to unite all of Earth's super-villains under his control, Lex Luthor (who is secretly Alexander Luthor, Jr. of the original Earth-Three) tried to recruit Catman to the team, only to be rejected. 

Wiz: Catman would later change from being a supervillain to a potent antihero, a cunning warrior with a sense of honor. Catman is an Olympic-level athlete and skilled skilled in hand-to-hand combat.

Boomstick: He's held his own against great fighters like Batman, Green Arrow, and Bronze Tiger, and fought lions without equipment during his outcast. Being one of the world's best tracker and hunter, he possesses an extraordinary sense of smell, has peak human level strength and speed. Speaking of best tracker, he's capable of finding his target with only a few words of information and once knew exactly where someone is, how many people are there, and that one of them has asthma by talking to them on the phone! 

Wiz: He was able to stop Bane in his tracks with a single kick, easily held back Captain Nazi who is an evil counterpart to Captain Marvel/Shazam, tackled the 345 lbs (156 kg) gorilla Monsieur Mallah out a window, tanked a hit from Cheetah, and killed a demon from Hell. 

Boomstick: Catman has dodged a blast from Virtuoso who fires music at people, swings too fast for Scandal Savage to react, pulls a woman in front of thrown knives after the knives are already thrown, and dodged bullets from a helicopter. This man is no joke!  

Wiz: You aren't wrong. For a guy that dresses like a cat and commits burglary he's an impressive combatant. 

Catman: "Predators and scavengers, Doctor. That’s what the wild is made of. I look in your eyes—I don’t see a hunter. You pick the bones the fighters leave behind, Doc? That your speed? Of course, there is one last category. Prey, Doctor. You’re only prey."

Fisherman[]

Wiz: Being the King of Atlantis isn't the easiest job in the world. Aquaman has protected Atlantis from the surface world for many years.

Boomstick: Until Aquaman revealed himself and the existence of Atlantis, its secrecy was shattered and many people tried to take advantage of this city. Either by attempting to conquer Atlantis, trying to start a war with the Atlanteans, or steal its treasures. 

Wiz: Introducing the mysterious Fisherman! An international criminal that steals high tech equipment and sells them to the highest bidder. After a man named Professor Brant accidentally splashed Aquaman with a special growth serum, he was murdered by the Fisherman who also stole the formula in hopes of using it to loot Atlantis. 

Boomstick: Later on, Aquaman and Fisherman battled it out as giants, with Aquaman coming out as the victor. This wouldn't be the end of Fisherman, as he would return several more times with the mantle picked up by two other people. 

Wiz: The second Fisherman makes his appearance after the Spectre had just destroyed the Rock of Ages and Captain Marvel fell towards Gotham from the sky. A hole had been ripped into the city's sky unleashing The Seven Deadly Sins.

Boomstick: During this chaotic event, several villains went on a riot on the GCPD.  These include Riddler, Fisherman, Red Panzer, and some others. The second Fisherman was shot in the back and killed by some cops after refusing to stand down. After his death it is revealed that he is not the original villain of the same name.

Wiz: The third Fisherman was the weirdest version of this character. It is revealed that his golden helmet is a xenoform parasite, some sort of parasitic alien that leaches onto every incarnation of the Fisherman and using them as hosts for its own personal gain.

Fisherman 02

Boomstick: It's kind of like some sort of an aquatic Venom symbiote.

Wiz: The parasite allows Fisherman to breathe and talk underwater. It can also latch onto enemies and take over their mind and body as a new host. Meaning, if you were to defeat Fisherman you'd have to kill the parasite. 

Boomstick: Fisherman wears a utility belt to hold his deadly fishing tools. He has a variety of lures: Knockout gas lure, grenade lure, torpedo lure, depth bombs, telescoping fishing rod, and net lure. He also has a harpoon gun. 

Wiz: His signature weapon is a fishing rod made out of reinforced titanium steel and an incredibly strong polymer line, which he can cast with great accuracy using either razor-sharp hooks or specially weighted lead bobs. He wears a special pressurized suit that allow him to handle the deadly pressures of the oceans. 

Boomstick: Fisherman knows basic hand-to-hand combat able to go up against the likes of Aquaman, King Shark, and an amnesiac monster called Dweller in the Depths. His fishing hook can even hold Aquaman for a short amount of time. 

Wiz: Overall, Fisherman is one foe you don't want to mess with in the sea.

Fisherman: "Now, surrender your valuables, or you'll all be cast to Davy Jones's locker, courtesy of----THE FISHERMAN!"

Polka-Dot Man[]

Wiz: By the time Batman started his vigilantism, he quickly grew in popularity within Gotham City. He would even inspired a whole generation of costumed rogues that only dreamed of matching their wits against the legendary Batman by committing large harmless crimes just to attract his attention. Batman categorized these types of villains as "egocentric personalities" who were nothing but nuisances at best. 

Boomstick: One of these insane people was Abner Krill. Abner was just your average crook until he launched a crime wave based on spots and polka-dots upon Gotham, which would attract the attention of Batman and Robin.

Wiz: Because of his polka-dot and spot themed crimes, Abner called himself Mister Polka-Dot! He later tweaked his name to Polka-Dot Man. 

Boomstick: Mister Polka-Dot came up with a great scheme where he captured Robin and then outsmarted Batman. It was until Batman connected the dots and Abner was defeated. Abner was also obsessed with his public image as he would collect sensational headlines for his impractical crimes. Surprisingly, he became pretty popular in prison and would boast constantly with his fellow prison mates and in the criminal underworld of outsmarting the Dark Knight. 

Wiz: Abner utilizes polka-dot themed weapons called Gimmicked Dots. All the polka-dots on his suit are connected by inside wires that when removed, activate electronically. 

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Boomstick: Each polka-dot does something unique: red polka-dots can be used as buzzsaws, yellow polka-dots can transform into a flat, man-sized gliders, gold polka-dots can emit a blinding, disorienting light similar to a flare, white polka-dots expands into a literal bubble that can be used as protection or transportation, Fist Dots were dots that take the form of fists and when bounced off opponents at close range they would produce concussive effects, and the Hole Dot which is a black dot used as a portal to quickly get to locations. 

Wiz: Abner had succeeded in obtaining a minor celebrity status thanks to his weird gimmicks. The Gotham media followed Abner's life and he was featured as a guest on multiple talk shows. However, when the city was in danger by more terrifying and dangerous supervillains like Joker, Bane, or Scarecrow the public's interest died out and Mister Polka-Dot decided it was time to end his career as a supervillain. 

Boomstick: He wasn't totally done by committing crimes though. After finding himself unemployed, broke, and unable to pay his bills Abner was left with no choice but to start crime once again. But because he was broke he couldn't afford his electronic costume and resorted to using a baseball bat for his crimes. Man, you know you hit rock bottom when you run out of money to power your suit and have to resort to using a baseball bat!

Wiz: Abner failed at every attempt in robbing stores and people, and quickly became an alcoholic. Luckily for him, after Batman disappeared during the Final Crisis he joined a group of fellow loser supervillains led by General Immortus. He got his suit and powers back as a reward for his service and even renamed himself Polka-Dot Man! Life was certainly looking good for him.

Boomstick: Only for him to fucking die after his skull was crushed by a flying manhole cover when one of his teammates, the Human Flame ignited a gas line beneath the streets! What an end for this strange villain.

Polka-Dot Man: "Call me Mr. Polka-Dot! An odd name, but an apt one--for I shall use my inventive dots to make my name known throughout the underworld! Watch!"

Snowflame[]

Wiz: When it comes to having a superpower everyone gets it from some sort of source. 

Boomstick: Superman gets his powers from the sun, Flash gets his from the Speedforce, Bane needs Venom, the drug not the character. 

Wiz: Then there's the drug lord dubbed, Snowflame who gets his power from well, cocaine...

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Boomstick: Cocaine! Why am I surprised at this point. 

Wiz: Snowflame's real name is unknown, but he was born in Columbia which is famous for being the world's largest coffee and cocaine producer. He first appeared and fought the New Guardians, a superhero team with each member being selected from several different nationalities to represent the entire human race.

Boomstick: Snowflame is a metahuman who obtains his supernatural powers through various intoxicants and narcotics. His personal favorite is snorting cocaine. Upon getting high as hell, Snowflame would scream about how cocaine is a god, all while dressed like he's a Secretary of the Interior for the Ice Capades.

Wiz: Snowflame is also known for leading his own group or cult of other cocaine obsessed people. He seems to have some sort of warped sense of honor, and to some degree enjoys hanging around his cronies and fellow cocaine snorters. 

Boomstick: As for his abilities, they're pretty interesting. When snorting cocaine he gains superhuman strength allowing him to lift someone with one arm and even throw them, superhuman speed capable of dodging bullets, increased durability, and fighting prowess to extreme levels. 

Wiz: He's also impervious to pain and has the power of pyrokinesis where he can create an aura of white fire around him or shoot it out of his hands. If he keeps snorting cocaine his powers increase and become stronger. 

Boomstick: His strongest ability is the Cocaine Touch that occurs whenever he touches an opponent. Effects of this touch is that it makes someone high. 

Wiz: When your high, everything around you goes in slow motion. Individuals may feel extremely lethargic and hungry, with a deep sense of physical relaxation. A dangerous ability indeed... 

Boomstick: This touch was strong enough to make the Floronic Man high! You know the being who goes up against superheroes like Swamp Thing, Green Lantern, and the Atom! 

Wiz: It actually corrupted him. After being high, Floronic Man went on a rampage absorbing every cocaine he can find into his own body. I'm not making this up.

Boomstick: Snowflame was eventually defeated after being thrown into a shed filled with chemicals, and due to his white fiery aura around his body the shed exploded! Killing him inside. 

Wiz: Apart from his unique powers he does kind of lack in feats. He's gone up against Batman once, but is mostly known for taking on an entire team of superheroes, the New Guardians. 

Boomstick: If I were to have a super power It would be drinking beer to increase my overall strength, speed, and durability. 

Wiz: Of course it would... 

Snowflame: "I am Snowflame! Every cell of my being burns with white-hot ecstasy. Cocaine is my God -- and I am the human instrument of its will!"

Animal Vegetable Mineral Man[]

Wiz: Before the Doom Patrol was founded, Swedish scientist named Dr. Sven Larsen was angered after he accused his former mentor Dr. Niles Caulder of stealing his idea for the anti-decay ray. Later on, Larsen accidently tripped and fell into a large vat filled with amino acids. Amino acids are organic compounds comprised of nitrogen, carbon, hydrogen and oxygen, along with a variable side chain group. A normal human being needs 20 different amino acids to grow and function properly.

Boomstick: And Larsen took a whole lot more than 20 amino acids. Like, a whole lot more.

Wiz: When he awoke from the accident, Larsen found himself to be transformed into some sort of freak, a monster.

Boomstick: He had a second sentient head that was a dinosaur, the left side of his body was made out of plants, and the right side of his body was made out of rocks. He put those together and called himself Animal-Vegetable-Mineral Man! Such a creative name...

Wiz: Using his strange new powers Larsen went on a rampage to have revenge on Dr. Niles Caulder. Caulder by the way became the leader of the Doom Patrol and went by the superhero name, Chief.

Boomstick: Larsen, as Animal-Vegetable-Mineral Man would battle the Doom Patrol many tim

Doom Patrol Vol 6 11 Textless Variant

es. However, his reign of terror would end after he is frozen in solid ice by the Doom Patrol member, Celcius. But this obviously isn't the end of him as he would break free and escape. 

Wiz: Animal-Vegetable-Mineral Man, lets just call him AVMM from now on, would return as a member of the Front Men, a team of super-powered individuals working as guards for Mister Somebody Enterprises. This team attempts to frame the Doom Patrol by making them look bad in front of cameras. Unknown to the Front Men, Mister Somebody had rigged all their suits so that when they were defeated it looked like the Doom Patrol killed them. 

Boomstick: Animal-Vege-

Wiz: Eh hmn, Remember?

Boomstick: Um, I mean AVMM is extremely powerful by basically having the combined powers of Beast Boy, Metamorpho, and Swamp Thing. He can transform any part of his body into any animal (favorite is a T-Rex), plant (favorite are roots), or mineral (favorite are diamonds). AVMM sometimes is shown to combine several at once too. One time he turned into a dandelion to escape and even a freaking sponge!

Wiz: He also has superhuman strength, superhuman durability, can increase his size, and is pretty intelligent from being a scientist. 

Boomstick: He's climbed through steel like paper, unharmed by a gas station explosion in his human form, transformed into a flock of birds, as a giant tarantula he was strong enough to get hit by and lift a subway train, as a tiger he survived a fall from several stories, and more!

Wiz: He does have some weaknesses though. He's vulnerable to any natural weaknesses of the forms he takes and even when made of stone and plant matter he still seems to have vital organs or at least some sort of nervous system.

Boomstick: Who knew such an awesome character could have quite possibly the worst name in comic book history. 

Animal_Vegetable_Mineral_Man_DOOM_PATROL_1x03_Ending_Scene_HD

Animal Vegetable Mineral Man DOOM PATROL 1x03 Ending Scene HD

Blue Snowman[]

Boomstick: The final combatant of these rejects is Blue Snowman.

Wiz: Interesting enough the Blue Snowman is actually a woman. Her name is Byrna Brilyant. She's a scientist like her father before her who died while working on his most ambitious invention called "blue snow", a special form of precipitation that can freeze anything it comes into contact with.

Boomstick: Originally intended to help humanity, Bryna became greedy and put her father's work to more profitable use. Byrna disguises herself in a special suit and unleashes the chilling power of blue snow upon Fair Weather Valley's farming community. 

Wiz: She demanded the farmers to hand over their "life savings" and in return they would receive the chemical antidote that will unfreeze their crops, livestock, and people from the blue snow's effects. Byrna now dubbed Blue Snowman

BlueSnowman

would make operate in her own base, a mountain sanctuary until it is uncovered by Wonder Woman. The two would battle it out with Wonder Woman coming out on top. 

Boomstick: After her defeat, Wonder Woman arrested Byrna and sentenced her to prison on the Amazon penal colony Transformation Island, which is where all of Wonder Woman's rouges go when they are defeated. 

Wiz: Then in 1948, Byrna and seven other female supervillains escape and founded the Villainy Inc.. A supervillain team comprised of female only supervillains all with a hatred towards Wonder Woman. 

Boomstick: But good always prevails, and Villainy Inc. was soon defeated thanks to the Amazonian princess. They did return several times later though. 

Wiz: Blue Snowman never really had any other major appearances afterwards. She was seen pursued and defeated by the likes of Power Girl and Doctor Mid-Nite. Shortly after her defeat, Blue Snowman is accidentally killed and devoured by a giant alien bug that another superhero, Vartox brought to earth in order to impress Power Girl.

Boomstick: I can see why... 

Wiz: Um, ok. Blue Snowman possesses no superpowers, but has a genius-level intellect. Her snowman mecha suit ncreases her strength and durability. Byrna has built her own army of robotic snowman that she can summon to battle, though they were shown to be pretty easy to destroy when going against Wonder Woman. 

Boomstick: She also has a "telescopic snow ray" which creates large blizzards and carries a "defroster ray" for reverse effects. She also uses a variety of gadgets, including a hat that produces blue snow and her smoking pipe that fires icicles.

Wiz: As for her weaknesses she doesn't have any. Though, I guess we can safely assume that heat type weapons work well against her and destroying her suit would make her useless. 

Blue Snowman: "Blast that infernal Amazon -- She beats off my iron robots like paper dolls! But she can't fight her own Magic Lasso! Ha Ha!"

Intermission[]

Wiz: These weird characters are set and ready for battle.

Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLLEEE!



DEATH BATTLE[]

It was a dark night. Roulette needed new combatants for her super powered cage fights. After some research and investigation Roulette finally found them. She wrote some envelopes and spread them between her goons.

Roulette: Go! Send these letters to them!

The goons nodded and ran away into the night. In the morning, Kiteman opens his mailbox and sees a strange envelope. He opens and reads it. "Congratulations, you have been invited to a competition to win $1,000,000! Come to this location but come alone." Kiteman runs back into his house to grab his equipment. He isn't the only one to recieve the invitation: Snowflame, Blue Snowman, AVMM, Polka-dot, Fisherman, Condiment King, and Catman have also recieved one and are gearing up. 

Roulette waits impatiently in front of her base. Eventually, the 8 supervillains arrive in their ridiculous costumes. 

Kiteman: What are you doing here, Condiment King? 

Condiment King: I was going to say the same thing... 

Roulette: You have all been invited to compete in a competition to become rich! 

Catman: What do we have to do? 

Roulette: Easy, everyman for themselves! Last one standing wins. Now please follow me inside. 

The supervillains walk into Roulette's base. They pass by several other arenas: In one arena Codpiece's cannon and Eraser's head lay on the ground, another has Crazy Quilt's corpse, and another has Egg Fu shattered into pieces with Ten-Eyed Man standing victourious.

AVMM: It appears we aren't the first group of villains to be in your games... 

Roulette stops in front of a door, it opens and she gestures the supervillains inside. The supervillains enter a tall and large, cylinder concrete room with lights along the walls.

Roulette: Good luck to all of you. You'll need it.

The doors close behind them and a large screen appears with some numbers counting down, starting from 10. The villains spread out and prepare for battle as the counter reaches zero.

FIGHT![]

Condiment King fires a spray from his cannons at Kiteman. Kiteman dodges it by flying up into the air using his jet powered hang glider. 

Condiment King: I relish the fact that you mustard the strength to face me. 

Kiteman: I was worried you were going to start saying condiment puns. 

Kiteman flies downward and kicks Condiment King in the head, knocking him onto his back. Meanwhile, all the other supervillains engage in their own duels: Snowflame shoots a white fire ball at Blue Snowman who counters it by firing snow. Catman leaps over a grenade lure from Fisherman and ducks under a swing from his fishing rod. AVMM increases his size while Polka-Dot circles around him on a yellow polka-dot. 

Blue Snowman fires a swarm of icicles at Snowflame. He rolls to the side and shoots a fire ball, it hits Blue Snowman in the side and rips some pieces off her suit. 

Snowflame: Your tech is no match for my WHITE POWERS! 

Blue Snowman: Your what!? 

Snowflame yells and jumps towards Blue Snowman. He lifts and throws her into a wall. Condiment King pulls out a mustard gas grenade and chucks it into the air. It explodes releasing a yellow gas. Kiteman flies through it and starts coughing before crashing into the floor. 

Condiment King: I knew you could never ketchup to me Charlie. 

Catman: Hey! Shut up with the condiment puns! 

Catman hip throws Fisherman to the ground and throws a catarang into Condiment King's right leg. The hit staggers Condiment King. He shoots some corrosive condiments at Kiteman who blocks it using his kite. The acid quickly melts through so Kiteman throws it away. 

Kiteman: Luckily I came up with a backup. 

He presses a button on his chest and an extra kite opens outward on his back. Fisherman gets up onto his feet.

Fisherman: To Davy Jone's locker! 

Fisherman swings his fishing hook into the kite and pulls Kiteman towards him. 

Fisherman: Kites are a pathetic choice for a weapon. 

Kiteman: I don't just carry kites you know? 

Kiteman retrieves his pistol and unloads it into Fisherman's chest. Fisherman collapses and dies on the floor, while Kiteman soars back into the air. AVMM slaps Polka-Dot off his hover board, but he uses his black dot to teleport away to avoid crashing onto the ground. Snowflame uses his super strength to rip through Blue Snowman's suit. 

Blue Snowman: Get off of me! 

She fires a large blast of snow that covers most of the arena. Snowflame is submerged and is frozen in the process. AVMM roars and slithers out of the snow as a giant diamond snake. Polka-Dot also climbs out of the snow, protected by his bubble dot. The bubble all of a sudden pops as Catman tackles Condiment King through it. Catman delivers a heavy beat down and hits Condiment King unconscious. Polka-Dot intervenes by rapidly punching Catman using Fist dots. Catman spits some blood out and whistles. Catman's tiger comes out of nowhere and lunges at Polka-Dot. 

Polka-Dot: Umm, good kitty! 

Polka-Dot screams as he gets mauled to death by Rasputin.

(7/8)

The tiger roars in triumph, but a golden creature leeches onto its head. The Fisherman's parasite takes control of Rasputin and sprints towards Catman. Meanwhile, Snowflame melts out his icey prison. 

Snowflame: I need more...

Snowflame takes out some cocaine and smashes it into his face. His cocaine fire grows and melts any surrounding snow. 

Blue Snowman: Just stay dead! 

Blue Snowman summons her robot troops. However, Snowflame destroys the robots using his pyrokinesis with the rest being dealt by AVMM who is ramming them to pieces in the form of a rhino made out of rocks. Blue Snowman panics as Snowflame gets a hold of her. He rips her helmet off and is shocked to discover her to actually be a woman. 

Snowflame: I must be high! 

Blue Snowman: You think? 

AVMM: That's not how you treat a lady Snowflame. This is how! 

AVMM stretches out an arm made out of bark. It pierces through Blue Snowman's chest and rips her in half while Snowflame backs away in fear.

(6/8)

Kiteman watches the battle from the air until he shoots a light bulb kite that flashes the battlefield.

Kiteman: Hell yeah.

The kite flashes most of the combatants. It blinds AVMM who swings his plant arms rapidly and accidently runs into a wall, it blinds Rasputin which makes it easier for Catman's attempt to pry the parasite off, and Snowflame who is still praising cocaine. Condiment King awakes and notices Catman successfully pull off the parasite and toss it away. It accidentally lands on top of Condiment King's head and quickly takes control of him. 

Fisherman: This body will do for now. 

Fisherman aims his condiment cannons at Rasputin and fires, melting the poor tiger down into mush. 

Catman: No, Rasputin! 

Fisherman/Condiment King: I've relish this moment! HAHAHA- Why the hell did I say that? 

Catman becomes furious and rushes towards the two. He dodges under a blast of corrosive condiments and slides inbetween Condiment King's legs. Catman slashes at the condiment tanks and condiment explosives causing them to explode. It covers Condiment King and the parasite in a mix of condiments and the Scoville gas. 

Fisherman/Condiment King:

Spongebob_MY_EYES!!!-0

Spongebob MY EYES!!!-0

Condiment King and Fisherman both quickly melt to death while Catman covers his nose from the spicyness of the gas.

(4/8)

AVMM transforms into a murder of crows that fly upwards. 

Kiteman: This reminds me of a movie I once saw. 

Kiteman tries to shake the crows off his tail, but fails. The crows fly above him and combine into a giant rock that smashes Kiteman into the ground. Kiteman yelps as he is crushed beneath its weight.

(3/8)

Snowflame glances to his side and gets scratched in the face by Catman. The two engage in hand-to-hand combat. Snowflame throws a punch, but Catman dodges it and strikes Snowflame in the elbow hard enough to snap the arm in the other direction. 

Snowflame: AHH! Even if I die. My fellow snorters will continue my legacy! 

Catman: Oh shut the hell up you weirdo.

Catman upper cuts Snowflame into the air, where he is then eaten whole by AVMM in the form of a T-Rex.

(2/8)

However, because he ate Snowflame AVMM becomes crazy high. He roars at Catman with blood and smashed guts flying out. Catman throws some Catarangs at AVMM's reptilian eyes. Catman then leaps into the air attempting to attack the human head of AVMM with his claws, but AVMM turns his body into diamonds which break Catman's fist on contact. 

AVMM: It's over for you kitty! 

AVMM releases a swarm of vines that wrap around Catman's body. The vines pull Catman's limbs off one by one and ending his life.

(1/8)

AVMM decreases back into normal human size with the Cocaine Touch still having some effects. Roulette then speaks through a speaker.

Roulette: Congratulations AVMM you are the winner! You'll get your prize shortly. 

AVMM: I need cocaine... 

AVMM collapses onto the ground. Roulette turns to her goons and smiles. 

Roulette: Bring in the next batch.

Results[]

Boomstick: Huh, I have nothing to say... 

Wiz: This battle was certainly something. In a Death Battle Kiteman, Condiment King, Blue Snowman, and Polka-Dot Man would probably be the first ones to go. Kiteman's kites wouldn't really do much except give him some distance. Condiment King could actually have a chance at winning thanks to the corrosive cannons and Scoville bomb, but some of the other combatants are just way more powerful and can counter it. Blue Snowman has her blue snow, but then again others can counter it like Snowflame's fire, AVMM's shapeshifting, and Kiteman's addiction to soaring above ground. Polka-Dot man has some good tech, but without it he's a goner. 

Boomstick: Then we have Snowflame, Catman, Fisherman, and AVMM. 

Wiz: I thought you stopped talking? 

Boomstick: I did and now I've returned. Fisherman's equipment would only help him for so long. His strongest weapon is the parasite which could take control of other combatants, but that's about it. 

Wiz: Snowflame's ability to increase his power by snorting more cocaine should make him a dangerous threat, but he was shown to be easily killed in a shed explosion. Plus, his Cocaine Touch power would only make his enemies more dangerous as they would likely become more delusional and insane. Kind of like what happened to Floronic Man.  

Boomstick: Second to last is Catman. Catman has an advantage of being the fastest combatant here as shown when he pulled a woman in front of throwning knives after the knives are already thrown. He is also the most skilled fighter but still, it won't be enough to take down AVMM. 

Wiz: AVMM is definetly the winner of this fight. He's the strongest one here in terms of power, strength, durability, and perhaps intelligence. He's broken through steel like paper, can shrug off being blasted by lasers, explosions, and getting hit by a train. He is capable on taking on a team of superheroes by himself and his shapeshifting is also a huge plus. He can turn his body into just about any mineral, animal, or plant that he chooses to in order to counter the other combatants attacks. 

Boomstick: As I said before he literally has the combined powers of Swamp Thing, Metamorpho, and Beast Boy. 

Wiz: The winner is AVMM!


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