| Freed From The Flames | |
|---|---|
| Overall Episode | 21 |
| Air date | Work in Progress |
| Written by | XarXel |
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Charlie Morningstar VS Zagreus is a What if? Death Battle by XarXel. It features Charlie Morningstar from the 2024 Amazon Prime official series Hazbin Hotel, and Zagreus from the indie rogue-like game of 2020, Hades.
Description[]
Hazbin Hotel VS Hades! The angelically optimistic princess of Hell crosses fates with the tenacious God of Blood. With their kindness pushed aside for royal dispute, which immortal dweller will come out on top?
Intro[]
The episode opens with the Death Battle transition card closing before opening again to show Zagreus jumping into the air with his Stygian blade above him, as he descends down and swings it overhead with Charlie blocking the blade with her shield, which pauses and grays out as Ringmaster shouts...
The screen then statics into playing the Death Battle intro.
(Wiz & Boomstick by Brandon Yates)
We open with Wiz and Boomstick in the lab, with the lights out and a satanic ritual taking place.
Boomstick: "Today, on this special Death Battle, we'll be going to actual hell for the most sinister and bloodthirstiest devils to exist! Mwah ha, ha, ha, haa!"
Wiz: "Actually, we'll be focusing on some of the kindest souls in the the afterlife in spite their hellish origin."
Boomstick: "Oh. Wait, like Charlie Morningstar, princess of Hell and caretaker of the Hazbin Hotel?"
Wiz: "Yes, and Zagreus, prince of the Underworld and God of Blood."
Boomstick: "Not Trigon VS Dormammu?"
Wiz: "Sorry to disappoint you."
Boomstick looks at the ritual around the lab, and realizing a crucial mistake.
Boomstick: "Sorry for using the wrong ritual."
Wiz: "...What?"
Suddenly, the ritual bursts into flames upon the lab, teleporting Wiz and Boomstick, along with their tv, to an elevator. Wiz, realizing what this elevator is, becomes horrified at what's to come.
Wiz: "Oh, no, no, no, noooo!"
Boomstick: "Yeah, I know how awkward you have it with this particular demon. But hey, this snazzy elevator is pretty chilling.
Wiz: "Boomstick, that's the point. They like to torment you in anyway they can. Luckily, I think we got a few good minutes before we actually meet them anyhow."
Boomstick: "Well, might as well continue doing what we love! He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!"
Wiz: "A-and it's our j-job to test their weapons, armor, and skills to find out w-who would win a Death Battle."
Charlie Morningstar[]
Wiz: "At the beginning of creation, there existed Heaven, habited by angels made of pure light and defenders of good. Among these angels was the ambitious dreamer, Lucifer Morningstar."
Boomstick: "He had a lot of fantastical ideas for Earth, but the elders deemed him troublesome, moving him out of the way for mankind. There, they make the first two humans, Adam and Lili- wait, something's not right. Ah, I'm sure it's fine. Well, Adam demanded control, but Lilith refused to submit, taking her freedom with her away from his garden."
Wiz: "This fierce independence lured Lucifer, and the two fell in love. They wanted to share free will with the rest of humanity, offering the fruit of knowledge to Adam's second bride Eve."
Boomstick: "Okay, this story is sounding off, but I assume this action caused evil to seep into the world?"
Wiz: "Yes, the order the angels have protected was shattered beyond repair, creating Hell as a result. Lucifer and Lilith were cast down to the pit they created, never seeing the good that came - only the cruel and wicked, from the lowest Sinner to the most powerful Overlord."
Boomstick: "Where Lucy became depressed by this punishment, Lily reveled in the sinners down in Hell and empowered their voices. Hell unfortunately got too big for it's britches, leading Heaven to... well, commit genocide. Why don't you just put Hitler in Heaven while you're at it? Or Netanyahu?"
Wiz: "Adam formed the Exorcist angels to snuff the souls of Hell out, so that Hell could never rise against Heaven."
Boomstick: "Damn, imagine pissing a guy off so bad he performs a genocide against your race. Well, Lucy did steal both of his wives that were made for Adam. Heh, loser! Even I banged my ex!"
Wiz: "But out of the carnage, out of the ten of thousands of years, Lilith's hope was passed down to their precious daughter, the princess of Hell, Charlie Morningstar."
Boomstick: "Yeah, the lore of Christianity is a little different here. Despite growing up in, you know, Hell, Charlie is actually a sweet angel. Like, I know she's half angel, but you think growing up in hell wouldn't mold her to be a..."
Wiz: "Disney princess? What do you expect from the daughter of a dreamer? Inspired by her father's work as a child, Charlie developed into a compassionate soul in spite of her hellish origins. But with a billion needy demons to protect from the yearly exterminations, Charlie makes it her personal mission to find a more humane solution."
Boomstick: "That solution came to be the Happy Hotel, with the goal of redeeming sinners to turn them into angels and be accepted into Heaven! And, well... almost nobody takes it seriously. Neither the residents of Hell, nor the corrupt Exorcist angels in Heaven, as everyone has accepted the fate of sinners. Well, I did say ALMOST nobody."
Wiz: "Her most faithful ally is her girlfriend Vaggie, a former Exorcist Angel who had a change of heart. The two would fall in love and become protective towards eachother. Charlie would have actual patrons in her hotel, sinners she deems that could actually be saved, such as Angel Dust, a stylish mafia femboy contractually trapped in an abusive relationship, and Sir Pentious, a 'mustache-twirling' supervillain who Charlie actually does help grow to be kinder."
Boomstick: "Quite the cast, but we're not done yet. With no one else to help her project, out of nowhere, the Radio Demon, Alastor Altruist, funds the whole thing for his own amusement. You wouldn't think he would considering his background, but hey, I've done less savory things when I've been bored. Add his slaves, Niffty as the maid and Husk as the bartender, and Charlie has a complete hotel staff! Oh, and he changes the name to Hazbin Hotel."
Wiz: "However, despite all the work Charlie has put towards, her project doesn't go anywhere. She had made excellent progress redeeming Angel and Pentious, they're growing into more compassionate souls who'd fight for each other, but the Hazbin Hotel has not shown evidence that they could actually become angels for Heaven. Although, those senseless bureaucratic angels themselves don't know what gets you into Heaven in the first place."
Boomstick: "If I may bring some of my brains here, I think it works on Valhalla rules. Basically, put your life on the line for the lives of others and die soon after, and you're a shoe-in for Heaven!"
Wiz: "(knows and remains quite) …right. (normally) To make matters worse, Charlie trying to convince Heaven of this plan has only made Adam advance the next Extermination in half the yearly time, targeting the hotel first. With Extermination Day on the rise, Charlie would need to put her pacifism aside and fight back with her whole hotel."
Boomstick: "And as the daughter of an angel, she possesses great magic of demonic and angelic quality. Charlie can conjure fire, create waves of light, and blast fireworks as projectiles. Plus, all demons can tap into a full demonic transformation, and hers is quite the looker *whistles* in style and power."
Wiz: "There are other forms of magic lesser demons have performed, such as teleportation, telekinesis, necromancy, portal creation, possession, clairvoyance, invisibility, manipulate shadows, maybe even some of her father's gifts like Shapeshifting or creating life. And there's dealings, where by contract, demons would obtain the pawn's soul to gain Overlord-like power. To what they can do with them is up to their most selfish desires."
Boomstick: "You can relate, huh, Wiz?"
Wiz: "We wouldn't be arriving in Hell right now if I didn't."
Boomstick: "Touché. Beyond the various abilities, demons, especially of royal blood, are immensely powerful. Take for instance Stolas, because this gay twink owl once took his daughter to a dying star to sing her a LULLABY SONG! And he just took the blast of the star exploding."
Wiz: "Stolas was a fair distance away from the supernova, so analyzing how much damage he took, he'd take over 500 trillion tons of TNT! With Stolas not even flinching, such demons wouldn't even notice the meteor that killed the dinosaurs if it directly smash them itself, especially Charlie!"
Boomstick: "And Octavia and Stolas were right next to the star before it blew up! Taking the distance into account again, moving back to the portal in such a short amount of time would mean he possibly flew over twice the speed of light (2.38c)! But even if you could overpower these demons, they still wouldn't die because of their immortalities!"
Wiz: "Right. As long as they have their souls, demons live in Hell for eternity. The extra resilient sinners have been crushed, blown to pieces, shot, sliced and diced, drugged, torn apart, and they remain 'alive'. They can even piece themselves back together, although it takes a considerable amount of time, which all could apply to Charlie."
Boomstick: "No wonder the angels want the billions of them dead. Well, double dead. That must be why angelic weaponry is the most consistent way to kill sinners - snuffing out souls have been stated as permeant death in this world multiple times."
Wiz: "That would mean their bodies can regenerate from nothing so long as they have their souls. But with the Angels brimming with weaponry, Charlie sees no way out of her friends being slaughtered. However, Alastor found a secret..."
We cut back to Wiz and Boomstick in the elevator, as it suddenly stops and the recoil shakes the shaft. The façade of the elevator collapses, revealing it as a cage of angelic steel, and Wiz and Boomstick bare witness to Hell itself. From the looks of Hell, it seems like a mish-mash amalgamation of all types of hellish afterlives.
Out of the fire, the Devil appears (like they're named Devil), looking down on their newly caught victims. They possesses a lions mane and face, jagged dragon horns, the body of a gorilla, bat wings, and a scorpion tail (so I guess a manticore). They possess a saucy voice, like a black woman, only demented.
The Devil: "Ah, Wiz, I have awaited your arrival for so long."
Wiz: "Hello, Devil."
The Devil: "Now that you and your unfortunate friend are here, I shall have YOUR SOUL!"
They push their finger between the bars of the cage and taps Wiz on the chest. However, nothing else happens from this, confusing the Devil.
The Devil: "Is there something you need to tell me?"
Wiz: "Yeah, had to sell it for college. The Evil School of Science gave me immense student debt and-"
The Devil: "Wait, wait! The Evil School of Science? I'm pretty sure I have a vial of all those souls that school has stolen. They have literal storage units of souls! Wait right here."
They look around trying to find where they stored it, looking through every nook and cranny possible. They tunnel up one of the holes and leaves the two to rot in the angelic cage. Boomstick attempts to escape, but he burns his skin on the steel.
Boomstick: "Ow, f*ck! That stings!"
Wiz: "What did you expect? This steel can pierce all the way through your very soul, alive, demon, or angel. Not to mention, it can nullify our powers."
Boomstick: "Really?"
Boomstick lifts his shotgun leg in attempt to shoot them out of the cage. Despite successfully firing, nothing came out of the shotgun.
Boomstick: "Wow, you weren't kidding."
Wiz: "Of course not. This metal was once used to capture Stolas, and despite his all-powerful abilities, he was completely powerless by the blessed rope."
Boomstick: "Well, damn. Guess we're just stuck in this cage. So, you were saying something about Alastor?"
Wiz: "Well, seeing we can't escape, we can continue analyzing. You see, an Overlord, Carmilla Carmine, in charge of producing Angelic weapons in Hell actually beheaded an Exorcist Angel. Perhaps the whole reason the Exorcists thought themselves to be invincible was because they saw themselves to be above all demons."
Boomstick: "Yeah, turns out, their souls were just as vulnerable to the steel this whole time, and these morons left hundreds of weapons lying around Hell for all those thousands of years of exterminations. This just made Charlie and her friends killing their asses all the more embarrassing."
Wiz: "For Charlie, she gained a shield and a pitchfork."
Boomstick: "I think it's more of a trident."
Wiz: "It's a pitchfork, Boomstick. Anyway, the shield suited her pacifistic nature the best, allowing her to block angel attacks and knock them away rather than resorting to violence."
Boomstick: "But in the heat of battle, you can only prolong violence, proven when Sir Pentious' sacrifice to kill Adam early went up in flames. And in a pillar of flames herself, Charlie faces off against Adam herself with her pitchfork at hand."
Wiz: "From this rage, Charlie actually held a long while against Adam, even after he curb-stomped Alastor. And Alastor is no joke - well, until Adam broke his cane. He overthrew century-old Overlords gradually after arriving in Hell, thanks to his sheer power and intellect. Not to mention, Alastor is claimed to be all-powerful, having unimaginable power that rivals that of the top of Hell itself."
Boomstick: "Thing is, Hell is full of dangerous artifacts like the Grimoire, which Stolas claims to be infinitely powerful. And yet, angels possess a divine power that trumps over that of demons - as in they dwarf infinity. Hell, angels have actually helped 'expand' the universe itself! Considering Charlie is half-angel, defeating Adam might be possible in her hands."
Wiz: "Well, not at first. She managed to stab him thanks to her training with the angels' sweet spots, but Adam did overpower her, so her own dad had to save her."
Boomstick: "And to think he was a deadbeat like mine."
Wiz: "With that said, Charlie did manage to parry Adam's punch, which terrified the misogynist. And Adam used this same punch to destroy Alastor's forcefield, and the same showing of power that spliced the hotel in half. Parrying it was also impressive, considering Adam could keep up with her father, Lucifer, who dodged his beams of holy light."
Boomstick: "Yeesh, I can see why she holds back all the time. Charlie really does care about her people, and even seeing one of her clients die unleashed that raging might. But that rage blinded her, and it costed the life of one of her pets."
Wiz: "But in the end, Adam has died, and the day is won by Hell. With all her friends beside her, Charlie stops crying about the souls they lost and continues on to fight for redemption."
Boomstick: "Shame not ALL of her friends could."
Wiz: "I suppose not. But recall that Valhalla theory of yours..."
Boomstick: "Wait. You don't mean...?"
Boomstick: "OH, MY GOD, I CALLED IT!! I mean, huh. Guess Charlie's on the right path."
Wiz: "I'm more interested in what it all might lead to. The foundation of society's perception of Heaven and Hell for thousands of years, shattered with the idea of redemption coming true."
Boomstick: "Hey, with how many bigots have claimed power in Christianity, someone needs to take them down a peg. And in this show, it never took the work of an angel to set things right. To show Heaven the errors of their ways, it took the work of a devil."
Wiz: "Couldn't be said any better myself."
Zagreus[]
Boomstick: "Ah, Greek mythology. Gods and monsters, hanging about. Zeus, Athena, Hercules, Kratos, Pit, all iconic. And then, there's Hades."
Wiz: "Each Olympian God was given a task in charge of governing the world, even the universe, but Hades drew the short end of the stick. Instead of being in charge of Olympia itself like his dear brother Zeus..."
Boomstick: "He had to take care of our sorry dead asses instead. Tartarus was his domain, doomed to rule over it for eternity by the Fates themselves. He can't even leave this wretched place, or he'll die! ...and reform from the Pool of Styx in his own house to continue his rule."
Wiz: "It wasn't all doom and gloom for the Lord of the Undead, for he found love in Persephone, the Goddess of vegetation. Ironically, Zeus set up their meeting out of pity for Hades' administrative work. This worked as two birds for one stone, as Zeus was aware Kore (birth name) was unhappy under her own mother."
Boomstick: "The two really hit it off and were married in secret from the other Gods. And then they broke up. Why? I don't know, I guess seeing your baby die at birth changes your perspective of where your life is heading. This turned Hades bitter and incorrigible, unlike me after my first divorce."
Wiz: "Debatable."
Boomstick: "Worse yet, when it came time to give him his own video game, he wasn't even the main playable character! I don't blame him becoming a grumpy authority tyrant."
Wiz: "This resentment - because of the divorce, not the game - spreads his misery onto all the residents and workers of his domain, but none were more so than his own son, Zagreus, the God of Blood."
Boomstick: "Zaggie here never felt at home in the Underworld - his attempts of maintaining flow throughout this hell never met up to his father's standards. Hades believed his child to be foolish, reckless, and irresponsible, not changing his mind even after giving him training under Achilles, you know, the man who nearly ended the Trojan War by himself!?"
Wiz: "Worse, his heritage didn't help him to fit in the House of Hades, with his piercing green eye none of his relatives shared and his red blood like that of a mortal. Not even Zagreus knows about his true heritage, since Hades never entertains his questions."
Boomstick: "One night, he convince Hypnos to put everyone to sleep, so he could sneak around his father's desk, hoping for answers. Hah, reminds me of rummaging through my dad's wine stash when I was 8."
Wiz: "I didn't think you were all for wine."
Boomstick: "I wasn't. I was looking for answers about my heritage, just like Zagreus."
Wiz: "Oh. Well, he did find one answer - a note from his mother, Persephone. This was all but confirmed soon after by Nyx, who Zagreus thought was his mother. Persephone's reason for leaving was because she never fit in the Underworld, and after losing her child at birth, she thought there was no choice. She didn't even know Nyx revived Zagreus."
Boomstick: "And then he grows up to have a relationship with the grim reaper Thanatos. Just putting it out there. Nevertheless, Zagreus decides he shall escape the Underworld to find his mother. There's just one problem. NO ONE can leave Hades' domain."
Wiz: "Zagreus would need to fight his way out, against souls of Tartarus, Asphodel, Elysium, and the Temple of Styx. Unfortunately, he wasn't strong enough to escape on his first attempt."
Boomstick: "Thankfully, he's in a rogue-like game, so he can try again and again, and again, and again, and again, and again-"
Wiz: "-Thanks to the Pool of Styx, reviving his body upon death, growing more resilient each time. To escape the Underworld, Zagreus would need more than just his godly strength."
Boomstick: "Being the God of Blood, Zagreus can shoot out bloodstones that weaken and slow down his foes on contact. His blood boils, and speaking of heat, his very presence and soul are blazing with flames. Even his feet are ablaze."
Wiz: "He's developed a dash that allows him to phase through attacks and obstacles - so well, his reflex can activate it automatically. He learned this move from Thanatos' Shift."
Boomstick: "True bromance. But his most prominent tools of his escape attempts were the Infernal Arms. The Stygian Blade, the Eternal Spear, the Shield of Chaos, the Heart-Seeker Bow, the Twin Fists, and the Adamant Rail - all capable of tearing Tartarus a new one!"
Wiz: "Each of these weapon not only have different methods of attack - some for melee and one's an actual gun - but each of them have different benefits based on Aspects. These Aspects are tied to great names of Greek history and mythology. As a matter of fact, play Hades long enough and you'll find it's not just tied to Greek culture."
Boomstick: "Yeah, he can pull favors from other mythological icons like King Arthur, turning Stygius into the Holy Excalibur! The other aspects vary in terms of utility, but they work the same against any enemy. He can dispel and summon his weapons at will, upgrade them with Titan's Blood, and slay the souls of his enemies! Mwah ha ha ha ha!"
Wiz: "Tone it down, Boomstick. Moving on, in his runs, Zagreus would on occasion find Nectar, the very drink of the Gods. Giving these drinks to the residents rewards him with Keepsakes. These varies with what they offer, statistic buffs, lucky chances of healing items, and so on."
Boomstick: "The Lucky Tooth allows him a single resurrection in battle, and the Evergreen Acorn and Broken Spearpoint allow him invincibility. The spearhead offers invulnerability for 1.5 seconds after taking damage, while the acorn nullifies damage for the first five hits. Would've been useful for my sex life, ha-ha!"
Wiz: (groans) "However, the Infernal Arms nor Keepsakes weren't enough to even get past Tartarus. Luckily, Nyx actually helps his foster son's escape attempts by calling the Olympian Gods themselves."
Boomstick: "Oh, pouring salt on your husband's wound, eh, Nyx? Thanks to her, Zagreus has access to the Olympians' power, though not by much in the Underworld. You got the classic gods helping out, like Zeus, Poseidon, Athena, Hermes - even primordial beings like Chaos itself join in!"
We cut back to Wiz and Boomstick, still stuck in the angelic steel cage.
Wiz: "All these gods give their blessings, something we need right now, in the form of Boons, granting various elements that strengthen Zagreus' attributes."
Suddenly, a white light beams down behind the two, summoning a boon with a white eye symbol.
Wiz: "...very much like our ticket out of Hell right here!"
However, just as Wiz reaches out to grab the boon, a gigantic burst of flames comes out of one of the numerous portals. Frantically, Wiz hides the boon underneath his lab coat, knowing what's behind those flames.
Forming into solid matter, the Devil returns with a jar full of spiritual energy. They search through the jar, trying the right soul, giving Wiz and Boomstick to hide the boon better by burying it in the red course rough dirt.
The Devil: "Aha! Here he is! Ha- hey, were you two trying to escape?"
Boomstick: "What!? NO!!"
Wiz: "'Trying' isn't selling us short enough."
The Devil: "Okay, just checking."
They pull out a soul resembling Wiz. The two are horrified.
The Devil: "I've been waiting for years to have our little dance, and now with your body AND soul in Hell, I can-"
Soul Wiz: "That's not my body."
Wiz, Boomstick, and the Devil were all taken aback.
The Devil: "Excuse me?"
Soul Wiz: "That's not my body. It's a genetic clone gone through a hint of generation loss."
Boomstick: "Sounds like incest."
Soul Wiz: "Who the hell are you!? Like, no, it's not! It's the deterioration of a copy's quality, like copying paper in a printer from an already printed paper. Look, his eyes aren't symmetrical!"
The Devil takes a closer look at Wiz's eyes. It cuts to a hyper-realistic painting of Wiz, where his left eye's position is slightly lower than his right. Learning the soul of Wiz is right and it's truly not his original body, the Devil roars in fury, shaking the cosmos themselves.
The Devil: "He's right! And that means I can't legally... GAH!! (to Wiz) Why did you make that cloning machine!?"
Wiz: "Blame my co-host. The time I sold my soul from now is astonishing! I lost track of how many times I died, and, frankly, I can't remember which body was the original anymore!"
The Devil's infuriated snarl ceased from her face, finding a saving grace from that phrase. They poses like Marc Antony with Wiz's soul in her grasp. Wiz and Boomstick sweat, worrying she might get her way. Thinking about it, they put the pieces together and the puzzle looks like it might.
The Devil: "You can't recall who was the original anymore? Well, then whose to say the original body ISN'T deceased? Would you deny it?"
Wiz: (hesitating) "N-no...?"
The Devil's frown turns into a crooked grin, before laughing maniacally. The laughter makes everyone uncomfortable, even the hellborn demons in the background. Hell itself starts shaking and even crumbling a little as their laughter grows more bombastic and demented.
The Devil: "Then I have no use for you mortals. Can't send you back to Earth, so the bottom will be your new home."
The Devil snaps their fingers, causing the floor under the cage to cave in. Wiz and Boomstick scream their throats out in terror as they fall deeper into the flames. Wiz's soul looks in horror, seeing his mortal body (and his "co-host") fall deeper into hell, but as he turns his head to face the beast, that fear deepens further when he realizes the Devil gets to do whatever they want with his soul hide.
Soul Wiz: "W-w-w-what was that about a dance? You're not planning to eat me?"
The Devil: "No. You became God's favorite. I saw why when I fell in love with you."
Wiz's soul gulps awkwardly, finding grief in the Devil herself madly in love with him. The Devil flies in a bolt of flames deeper into Hell, preparing for that "dance".
However, speaking of God, the cliff of the hole bulges out as the weight of their boon shifts towards the now empty space.
As the cage falls further down, Wiz and Boomstick crash on the ground, where this layer of hell is completely frozen over and freezing cold. Frost seeps over the cage, bringing in the immense amount of cold to our hosts.
Boomstick: "Okay, why is this part of Hell so goddamn cold? I thought it was all fire."
Wiz: "Heat rises, Boomstick, so the bottom would clearly be the coldest."
Boomstick: "Oh, you're just full of nerdy facts, huh?"
Wiz: "What do you mean!? You asked the question!"
Boomstick: "Well, now we're gonna freeze to death just as your God daddy delivered us the way out!"
Wiz: "Look, our body heat can last us... uhm, 10 minutes here. That's more than enough time to do what we love best. Am I right?"
Boomstick: *sighs* "Fine. It's been an honor, Wizard."
Wiz: "Many of these elements are Zeus' lightning to smite his enemies, Poseidon's water to push them away, Dionysus' poison to drain them, and Demeter's cold to freeze them in their tracks."
Boomstick: "The other Gods offer way more to help in combat, with Athena's attack reflection, Artemis' critical chance, and Ares' curses of spinning blades and misfortune. Keep in mind, this actual God of war can stir a sudden scourge of war if he chooses!"
Wiz: "Hermes amplifies his speed, and keep in mind, he is in charge of bringing the recently departed to the Underworld's borders in Greece, and he manages to transport them faster than Thanatos, who could teleport. If this means he can circle the entire Earth in one hour, he's 30% faster than light (like this feat)."
Boomstick: "Last but FAR from least, the Primordial Originator, Chaos, lends a hand to help as well, but at a price of health. In fact, his boons give Zag a disadvantage but overtime warping reality to his own benefit. Much like your swooning Devil, huh?"
Wiz: "Each of the Gods can attribute their abilities though other aspects of combat, such as attacking foes upon Zagreus getting hurt, mix their strengths with duo boons, and a call, which unleashes their full power for only a few seconds. However, Nyx's helping hand does not stop at the Olympians."
Boomstick: "Yeah, Zaggie would have a lot of time to reflect on his dark abilities in the Mirror of Night. Getting enough darkness allows him to buy them, like an extra dash, a boost of damage and health, and up to 3 resurrections mid-fight."
Wiz: "Unfortunately, aside from the Mirror's abilities, all of Zagreus' arsenal are not all obtainable in each escape attempt. This game being a rouge-like meant Zag was not experiencing the same choices every attempt. Different weapon, different keepsake, different boons, etc."
Boomstick: "Now, Zag could dispel and re-summon his weapons through dimensional storage, so there's no reason to say he couldn't manually switch weapons outside of game mechanics, but the same can't be said for aspects or his keepsakes."
Wiz: "Still, after so many attempts, Zagreus has beaten the many enemies and bosses of the Underworld. He's beaten the Furies guarding the gates of Tartarus, the Bone Hydras hiding in the lava pools of Asphodel, and the Bull of Minos and the hero Theseus in a 1 on 2 fight in Elysium."
Boomstick: "Who the hell is Theseus? The guy behind the dictionary?"
Samuel Johnson: "No, that would be me."
The sudden voice switches the camera to Wiz and Boomstick in the cage. They look to where the voice was coming from, seeing Samuel Johnson as he waves hello before his body freezes solid.
Wiz: "But his greatest feat was actually defeating his father, Hades, in combat. Through trial and error, Zagreus overpowered him. Hades is extremely powerful, such case with the aid of five other gods against his own father, Chronos, the Titan of Time, and Hades himself describes him as 'Time itself'."
Boomstick: "Keep in mind, this Titan was beyond death so they cut him up into innumerable pieces and scattered them across Tartarus, just so they didn't have to deal with them. For casual fun, Gods like Demeter can freeze all of the ocean, a feat worth 126 Petatons."
Wiz: "Other Gods like Artemis can keep up with her twin, Apollo, the God of Light, and he's not even the fastest out of all of them. Hell, his sister Melinoë could dash from his beams of light herself, and defeated Chronos multiple times."
Boomstick: "After his father's defeat, Zag finally leaves his domain. There, amidst the frozen winter season, he finds his mother in a prosperously healthy garden. However, the Fates are known to be cruel, and they just couldn't let this reunion last."
Wiz: "Just like his father, Zagreus is bound by the Underworld, the time he has on the surface dwindles shorter each successful escape attempt. But that would never stop him, as Zagreus pushes against it for answers."
Boomstick: "Zaggie's perseverance and fate were not to be trifled with. He's pushed through wounds that would kill a mortal, and he's fulfilled all of the prophecies in his Fated List, something Nyx thought was impossible. Nyx states doing so, Zagreus caught up with the Three Sisters of Fate's designs faster than they can weave, despite the sisters being stated to have perfect knowledge of the future- (exhales out of breath)"
Wiz: "Zagreus continues to fight his way to the surface to see his mother, even if it's only so short each time. Rather than continue seeing his own son die in front of her over and over, Persephone instead moves back into the Underworld. Upon her return, Hades apologized to both of them, for not telling Persephone about their son, and for being so hard on Zagreus his whole life. Both apologies were accepted, as they collectively agree to put the past behind them."
Boomstick: "As harmonious as the reunion was not just the Hades family, but all those in the Underworld who call it home, there was still the matter of the Olympians. Zagreus' task of escaping was transformed into a job to better Underworld security and to keep the illusion of his escape to Olympus alive for the time being."
Wiz: "After getting friendly with each of the Olympians, Zagreus sent out invitations to each of them for Persephone's plan of resolve; a feast from the Underworld. During the feast, she would reveal herself as Demeter's daughter, telling the tale while leaving some key details out."
Boomstick: "Zeus, knowing part of the truth, welcomes Hades back to the family, ending any possible god-like war hung over the truth. Zagreus felt wrong only telling half-truths to the Olympians, but he rests assured that it was needed."
Wiz: "Now with an actual job that suits his determination and skills, and all his family troubles gone - mostly - Zagreus can finally call the Underworld his home."
Prelude[]
Wiz: "Alright, the combatants are set. We've run the data through all possibilities."
Boomstick: "Only one thing stands in our way..."
The camera zooms out from the TV to reveal Wiz & Boomstick still trapped in the cage, the cold almost freezing them up.
Boomstick: "We're still stuck in Hell! And like shit we're ending it on Hazbin Hotel! Wiz, can't your clone machine revive us and send us home?"
Wiz: "(sighs) A; it only works for me, and B; it doesn't work for mortal bodies in different afterlives. Without our souls, we're just meatpiles waiting to rot and decay for the embrace of death, where our consciousness will be silenced into a void of nothingness! So, death without afterlife."
Boomstick: "Oh, great! A situation so bad, God had to help us, and did we take the help? NOOO!! We hid it away, and now, we can't even reach it!"
Suddenly, God's Boon slams through the ceiling of the cage and crashes down on it's floor, freaking out Wiz and Boomstick. Wiz recognizes the Boon and reaches his metal arm to grab it. Touching it blasts a light, activating a Hades-style quote from God with his voice. Also, he looks like how he does in Hazbin Hotel.
God: "Ah, hello, Wizard! How's my favorite creation doing? Trick question - I saw the whole thing through your eyes! Quite the pickle you are in. Hopefully, you can use my blessing to it's fullest potential."
A menu pops up showing three choices, boosting Attack, Special, or Shot. The Attack gets highlighted, as if Wiz picked it. As the boon disappears, Wiz's metal arm illuminates a holy aura, his grip tightening with great power. With tenacious determination, Wiz punches the holy bar with his metal arm, the shockwave of the impact bursts the entire section open.
Wiz looks back over to Boomstick, confidently smirking before waving his arm to follow him. Boomstick rolls his eyes admitting he was wrong, runs out the cage with the TV in hand. In the next shot, they stand in front of an elevator confused, with Wiz pointing at it like "get a load of this bullshit".
The next shot shows the elevator on a new floor, the doors opening for Wiz and Boomstick with their prominent weapons in hand (Wiz readies his holy metal arm and Boomstick weaponizes the TV), only for them to be caught off-guard for the fact they entered a cubicle workplace, one familiar to the introductory to the afterlife in Beetlejuice (1989).
No sign of hostility illuminate the corners of the room, only mindless busy work. Boomstick, feeling confident, decides to take the first step as if they could walk through no problem. However, stepping with his shotgun leg, it suddenly goes off, instantly freaking out everyone into a frenzy panic.
Shocked it just went off like that, Boomstick reaches for the trigger and pulls out and impish tail as if it pulled the trigger. Wiz was so ashamed of such an abysmal attempt, he prepared to berede Boomstick before realizing what really happened.
Wiz: "Out of all the times, THIS- huh? (sigh) Alright, we should just get a move on!"
Fighting their way through the frenzy, Boomstick spots a man flattened like roadkill flying across the room on a zipline. Jumping up to reach him, Boomstick grabs the man takes ahold of Wiz's arm as they both zip across the room up to the next floor.
However, their next floor is full of bloodthirsty demons ready to tear them limb from limb. Thankfully, another one of God's boon appears in front of them.
Boomstick: "DIBS!!"
Before anyone could react, Boomstick grabs the boon, playing a new interaction quote from God.
God: "Hey, I don't share these like candy, CO-HOST (imagine him saying it like a slur)! They're reserved for my FAVORITE creation's benefit! BEGONE!"
Boomstick feels the boon reject him by shocking his arm, but he refuses to let go and crushes the orb, absorbing it's power. A menu pops up once again, and Boomstick immediately picks the Special. Suddenly, his shotgun leg is granted a holy aura, Boomstick feeling it's power centimeters away from his fingertips.
With this feeling of power, Boomstick grits a huge and sadistic smile as he blasts a load from his barrel. The pellets incinerate the room full of demons instantly, even tearing a hole through Hell's borders. Wiz and Boomstick were in complete awe at the transpiralled event.
Wiz: "Y-you just blew a load through the boundaries of reality itself!"
Boomstick: "Pfft. You made it sound worse than it needed to be, and that's saying a LOT! And hey, whatever gets us out of here!"
Boomstick jumps into the rift blindingly, ascending instantaneously, his screams from the sudden speed dissipating just as fast. Wiz cringes his eyes for not only his partner's poor decision, but his reluctant own for following him soon after.
They fly through all of Hell, like a speedrunner out of bounds crossing through the entire. One good view was seeing the Devil dancing the tango with Wiz's soul, who is strangely enjoying it. Boomstick looks back to Wiz in confusion.
Wiz: "Eh, at least a part of me is eternally happy."
Unbeknownst to them, the Devil could see them out of bounds. Continuing the flight through the Inferno, the design becomes more outlandish and incomprehensible.
Boomstick: "What kind of design is this!?"
Wiz: "Hey, it's Hell. It can plant some spikes, some flames, and Robin Williams wherever the Devil damn pleases."
Boomstick: "Robin Williams? What did he do to be punished down here."
Wiz: "He's not being punished. His comedy is the punishment."
Boomstick: "Oh!"
However, their heads slam through an organic floor, stuck in place. Wiz's metal arm bursts out and lifts his whole body up. He pulls Boomstick up and they make a break for it. Unfortunately, they run into a dead end.
Boomstick: "(gasp) Dead End!"
The wall shows a poster for Dead End: Paranormal Park. More importantly, above it was a humongous TV, something Wiz notices is connected to a power outlet next to his foot. A great shadow eclipses the duo, as they turn around and find the Devil and their army ready to pound them.
The Devil: "Any last words?"
Wiz, pushing through his fears, acts quickly, connecting their TV to the power outlet. Boomstick, who pissed his pants, is hit with a microphone, catching on Wiz's plan. As Wiz does the final touches and fully takes over the screen, Boomstick takes a stand and pours his heart out as his voice booms through Hell itself.
Boomstick: "Get your popcorn, get your oversized drinks, and get ready, Hell, because it's time for a DEATH BATTLE!!!"
Fight[]
We open submerged in a pool of blood, with a body floating upwards. Zagreus shakes his head off walking out of the Pool of Styx, but he becomes shocked to realize he's not in the House of Hades this time. He's in a dark and bloody city, where the sky is violently red.
Zagreus: "Where am I? What have the Fates pulled this time?"
Suddenly, a random sinner bumps into him. The sinner flips him off like he bumped into him.
Zagreus: "Sir, where the hell am I?"
Special kind of Racist: "You serious? You're in Hell, dumbass."
Zagreus: "Okay. What part of the Underworld is that?"
Special kind of Racist: "Underworld? What are you, Greek? (closer inspection) Oh, wait. You are. The afterlife not following your my-college-y?"
Zagreus: "10 seconds of meeting one another and you're already on my nerves. You truly have talent."
Zagreus summons his Stygian Blade and performs World Splitter, slicing across the racist's face and sending his body away through Zeus' lightning. This attack sends the racist into a truck, gathered by other sinners who dress similarly, as if they're a gang. Others are running away screaming, trying to avoid the carnage about to ensue.
One of the gang members picks the racist up, and draws his tommy gun towards the hot-foot Greek. The rest of the members draw their weapons, ready to clobber Zagreus, but he switches his weapon to the Adamant Rail and starts blasting.
Zagreus: "Here we go again."
Cut to Charlie in her bedroom, she awakens to so much muffled noise, moving so groggily from her slumber being disturbed. She opens the window to witness what seems to be another turf war. Charlie's annoyance grows as she realizes this is what disturbs her.
However, huge lightning strikes blasts entire city blocks, alerting Charlie that this is a greater deal. The TV turns on in breaking news, the headline reading "Another Angel Attack THIS SOON!?" scrolling across the screen. Charlie runs past it, too focused on the actual carnage to learn more information.
Cutting back to Zagreus' fight through Hell, he runs and dashes through the many sinners trying to kill him, and multiple scratches and bruises over his body shows they had luck landing a blow on him, but he's too fast and strong to run away from or survive in one piece. He slashes through them like butter, and continues running through the city.
Zagreus: "Damn it, where is the exit?"
Suddenly, a blast of fireworks explode all around Zagreus, him quickly dashing back to avoid any unnecessary damage. Charlie in her battle outfit steps forth with her angelic shield in hand, holding her other hand like taming a velociraptor out to keep her distance.
Charlie's pose calms, turning her hand gesture over to a helping hand as she talks.
Charlie Morningstar: "I just want to talk. Can we talk?"
Zagreus' battle ready stance mellows out as he is not going to refuse a peaceful solution. He whisks away his Stygian Blade into dimensional storage, ready to hear the princess out.
The shot changes to a semi-top-down, showing dialogue texts from the characters.
Zagreus: "Alright, let's talk it out. Look, I just want to leave this place and return home."
Charlie Morningstar: "What? You can't go home. You died."
Zagreus: "Well, A; that always sends me back home everytime, not here. And, most importantly, B; I'm not sure if I did die, considering my boons are still intact to my weapons."
Charlie Morningstar: "Huh? Everytime? How can you die multiple times?"
Zagreus: "Simply, I am immortal and bound to the Pool of Styx."
Charlie Morningstar: "Then why do you bleed like a sinner?"
Zagreus: "Okay, you got me there. It's a birth defect. I am the son of Hades, God of the Dead."
Charlie Morningstar: "Wait. I don't believe-"
Zagreus: "Other religions and mythologies exist
Charlie Morningstar: "Look, denial is a normal response to entering Hell, and I can't allow you to leave. I'm sorry. You can work on redemption at my hotel. Maybe you'd get into Heaven."
Zagreus: "(sighs) Well, if you're going to stop me, then I apologize I could not resolve this dispute through your peaceful proposition."
Charlie Morningstar: "But-"
The textbox dialogue ends as Zagreus pulls out his Stygian Blade once more and prepares to battle. Charlie becomes disappointed, even teary-eyed, because she failed to negotiate with someone who even wanted a peaceful resolve, as she readies her defensive stance.
FIGHT!
Zagreus dashes into the air with his Stygian blade above him, as he descends down and swings it overhead with Charlie blocking the blade with her shield. A shock of electricity fly off the shield omnidirectionally. Charlie conjures sparkly light magic in her open hand and attempts to blast Zagreus point blank, but he quickly dashes behind her as soon as she fired and delivers a strike on her back, sending her forward.
Skidding across the ground, Charlie levels herself, brushing off the dirt caught on her dress. Zagreus fires a bloodstone, one amped by Artemis in green cloak, and it homes in on Charlie's position. Acting quickly, Charlie raises a pillar of flames, rushing forward that crashes against the bloodstone. As it heads towards Zagreus, he dashes through it with nothing scathed. But Charlie quickly follows it up with a shield tackle, sending Zagreus right back into the pillar of flames, creating a small explosion.
Results[]
K.O!
Advantages & Disadvantages[]
- Charlie Morningstar
- +
- +
- =
- -
- -
- Zagreus
- +
- +
- =
- -
- -
Original Track[]
COMPOSITION[]
The cover name would be "Blood & Happiness". The instruments take elements of the Ready For This song and God of the Dead theme
TITLE[]
The title references the constant "Blood and Darkness" phrase plenty of characters would curse out throughout the game of Hades, and Charlie's positive attitude overlaying it, much akin to her personality and ideals opposing the nature of Hell.
COVER ART[]
The cover art would have the Hades beard symbol is wrapped around the key symbol and pet of the Hazbin Hotel. The tips of the beard pierces the Heavens and it's pearly gate with golden blood spilled. A stream of golden magic carries red and orange pedals forming a burning laurel crown above the symbols.
Trivia[]
- The connections:
- Main characters of Indie productions that blew up in popularity and became more mainstream (Hades winning multiple game of the year awards and Hazbin Hotel becoming an Amazon Prime Show)
- Children of godlike beings who are the rulers of Hell/the Underworld (Lucifer Morningstar and Hades)
- Their fathers also were originally part of Heaven/Olympus
- Their mothers also have left them
- They want to help others escape their current by proving that they can be better than the people they used to be
- They want to do this in order to prove something to their regretful fathers.
- Their mothers (Lilith and Persephone) left them due to the actions of their fathers
- They could also have had similar births (Lilith in lore was cursed to have all her babies stillborn yet Charlie is alive and well as a 200 year old adult, and Zagreus canonically died at birth and was revived by Nyx)
- Both see the good in everyone and love them, even when they are evil
- Both of them are bisexual
- Their lovers are beings whose purpose is to kill others (Vaggie originally being an Angel Exorcist that killed Sinners while Thanatos is the embodiment of Death itself and tried to claim Zagreus' life as a baby)
- Both of them wear clothes that are colored red, which represents their status as the prince/princess of their afterlives
- Both of their respective series would obtain later spinoffs starring that have different protagonist (Hazbin Hotel having Helluva Boss that has Blitzo as it's star, while Hades would get a sequel with Melinoë as it's protagonist)
- The fight would be animated in HD animations