Caboose Vs SMG4 Mario[]
The Battle of the internet's favorite idiots. Battle created by Captain-Caboose345.
Captain-Caboose345 TN
Description[]
Battle of two idiotic internet web-series characters who have a knack for causing utter destruction via their stupidity! Michael J. Caboose from the popular Halo Machinima "Red Vs Blue" Vs SMG4's Mario from the popular Mario Machinima/Gmod series "SMG4".
Intro[]
Wiz: Michael J. Caboose, the Dimwitted yet pure hearted member of Blood Gulch's Blue Team.
Boomstick: And SMG4 Mario, the spaghetti humping idiot of "SMG4".
Wiz: The internet has had its fair share of wackiness and stupidity, and from where these two are from, their no exception.
Boomstick: They've been through it all from making new allies, new enemies, wars, loss, to even going as far as rivaling literal gods. I gotta say Wiz, I'm really not prepared for the outcome of this fight. But anyways, he's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle!!!
Caboose[]
Wiz: Imagine in the distant future, Humanity and an Alien covenant are in the middle of war. With countless lives lost and planets in peril, The United Nation Space Command comes up with a few rather, "risky" plans to win said war.
Boomstick: Enter Project Freelancer, which was an experiment that used A.I to create the most BADASS and UNSTOPPABLE super soldiers!!!
Wiz: Well, in order to train these A.I. enhanced warriors, they went for a more rather unique approach...
Boomstick: What was that approach, well by dumping a bunch of losers in the middle of a box canyon which would later be named Blood Gulch. Bum Bum BUUM!
Wiz: ..........Was that really necessary?
Boomstick: Damn straight it was Wiz! *opens a beer can*
Wiz: Ugh anyway, these "losers" would be told they're at war with each other and were directed two assigned teams.
Boomstick: The Red Team and The Blue Team! These two teams have been at war with each other for God knows how long and they still haven't even captured each other's flags successfully.
Wiz: Almost all of these people were either lazy, pushy, or just annoying, like some people I know.
Boomstick: Eh yeah, those guys are the absolute worst Wiz.
Wiz: *gives an annoyed stare*
Wiz: But there was one individual amongst the chaos, one so pure of heart and loyal to the core that it balanced the bad with the good. His name was Michael J. Caboose!
Boomstick: ......wait wha-
Wiz: Well he didn't plan to go to Blood Gulch at first. While applying for college, Caboose mistook an army recruitment center as an ivy-league university and accidentally signed up for the UNSC instead. After getting sent to bootcamp and receiving more than a few demerits, he got transferred to Blood Gulch.
Boomstick: And we can't stress this enough, he's really, really, really, really, really, REALLY, really dumb!
Wiz: Well, he's not exactly dumb, he has been shown to be an exceedingly impressive mechanic. However, his mind was altered due to O'Malley, Church and Agent Texas messing with his brain and having it tampered with.
Boomstick: But with that lack of brains, he makes up for in brawns.
Wiz: Indeed, he was able to flip over a warthog with ease was able to lift Andy the bomb for an extended amount of time, who theoretically weighs more than a tank, charged through an army of Tex clones without fatigue and even upper-cutted some of them so hard they fly a few feet in the air.
Popup: The average warthog weighs about 3 metric tons.
Boomstick: He's incredibly fast too, he was able to outrun a warthog which can travel up to 77 mph and can keep up with a star named Huggins who travels as fast as light.
Popup: Caboose isn't actually as fast as Huggins, but he was able to reach her while she was going minimum speed from Blue Base to the middle of Blood Gulch in at least 8 seconds.
Boomstick: Now as for weapons, Caboose doesn't really have that many. I mean all he has is a MA5C Assault Rifle, and a-HOLY MOTHER OF GOD WHAT IS THAT?
Wiz: That is a Mantis designed and programmed by Caboose himself named Freckles. But it's memory chip was stored in the assault rifle he uses so you don't have to worry.
Weapons[]
- MA5C Assault Rifles
- Freckles
- Genkins Golf Club
Boomstick: Oh, I was just screaming because of how awesome it was and definitely not because I just pissed myself about 10 seconds out of pure fear hehehehe...But I can see how that threw you off.
Wiz: Right...
Boomstick: Anyway, Caboose's durability is durability is nothing to scoff at either. He was able to survive from crashing headfirst into rock from falling off a 277-foot cliff, survived the explosion of a 50-megaton bomb which can be seen from space and even had half a gallon of his blood sucked out from Tucker's alien baby, and was fine about a few hours later.
Popup: He theoretically survived greater heights after getting blasted into the sky by stepping on a mine and was completely free from harm.
Wiz: And at one point when Caboose entered an Alien temple, an A.I. construct named Santa increased the room's gravity by ten-fold and didn't even phase him. If ten-fold gravity were to have an impact in the real world, no life could be sustained due to how strong the gravitational pull.
Boomstick: So, what you're saying is that we'd be totally F#@ked if that happened?
Wiz: Basically, but the chances of that happening in the real-world are next to impossible.
Boomstick: Oh good.
Wiz: Anyway, after fighting in a few wars and losing his best friend by sacrificing himself, Caboose and the rest of the Reds and Blues eventually retired. Well sort of it turns out that...
SMG4 Mario[]
Boomstick: Ahh the Mushroom Kingdom, a vast land of...well mushrooms of course, and is also the home of the heroic plumber named Mario. But there is one teeny, tiny difference in this universe however, MEMES EVERYWHERE!
Wiz: Well, it didn't start out that way. You see a long time ago, after Mario rescued Princess Peach from Bowser and restored the castle like he's normally done in the past, a strange UFO crash landed near the outskirts of the Mushroom Kingdom. Except, this wasn't a UFO, it was rather a supernatural USB called a Guardian Pod.
Boomstick: Which carried the almighty meme-lord himself SMG4! Of course, Mario being the hero he is, or was, decided to check out the strange space craft.
Wiz: This would create a problem, however. You see when Mario approached the Guardian Pod, it zapped him with "meme energy" turning him into a glitchy, unintelligent parody of himself.
Boomstick: Or in short, making him stupid, which is basically what happened to everyone else in the Mushroom Kingdom.
Wiz: SMG4 seeing the new and rather un-improved Mario, decides to record Mario and tell him to "do something stupid" and post his reckless behavior on the internet for all to see. Which somehow made Mario smart again, it's complicated.
Boomstick: Then after that fateful encounter, SMG4 was given a purpose, a purpose which would change the fate of the Mushroom Kingdom and theoretically the rest of the universe, alongside with Mario who humps spaghetti all day, what a duo!
Wiz: Gross.
Boomstick: Anyway, regardless of the amount of brain cells Mario lost, he gained a lot of new abilities to use.
Wiz: For example, some of his abilities include Backward Long-Jumping, using his mustache as a boomerang, using spirit bombs, and even his own body weight which could be used as a weapon.
Boomstick: In fact, at one point he was so fat that he was able to destroy the entirety of Earth.
Wiz: The exact amount of Mario's weight is inconsistent and varies from 12,988 pound to infinite which is scientifically possible to reach that amount. However, to destroy the Earth in it's entirety, we could determine that it would take about more than 560 billion tons of force to destroy the Earth.
Boomstick: And he can even use his nakedness to either blind, scare, or just straight up kill enemies, or just hump more spaghetti. Either way it's effective.
Wiz: Despite being so...heavy, he's shown to be surprisingly fast.
Boomstick: Yeah, there was that one time where Mario slapped the asses of everyone in the Mushroom Kingdom in about 10 seconds, oh yeah and that one time where the entire Mushroom Kingdom was surrounded by lava, he was trapped by lava king Boopkins. Ok get this, to escape the cage he Backward-Long-Jumped out of the cage and flew around the ENTIRE PLANET about 6-7 times.
Wiz:
Boomstick: The SMG4-verse is weird huh Wiz?
Wiz: Trust me, it gets weirder.
Wiz
Pre-Fight[]
Fight[]
Results[]
Wiz: The Winner Is.....