Boba Fett vs Neopolitan is a what if Death Battle
DESCRIPTION[]
RedDead35000
Justice is blind, but villainy is silent. These two are near-unstoppable mercinaries and assassins who will kill anyone, anywhere, for the right price.
INTERLUDE[]
Wiz: Many people will kill for a paycheck or for someone they care about.
Boomstick: But they somehow manage to button their lip, unlike a certain merc.
Wiz: Boba Fett, the iconic Mandolorian from Star Wars.
Boomstick: And Neopolitan, Roman Torchwick's silent sidekick and the near-unbeatable umbrella wielding villian from RWBY.
Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick. And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to figure out who would win a DEATH BATTLE!
BOBA FETT ENSLAVES DEATH BATTLE[]
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Wiz: A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, there was a bounty hunter named Jango Fett. He was considered among the best of all the bounty hunters in the galaxy.
Boomstick: But Jango got cloned for some dumbass reason and had an army made from his clone babies that grew up really fast. Like faster than a few days. That's weird.
Wiz: But Jango had one request: One of the clones would age slower than the others, so Jango could raise the child. His name, was Boba Fett.
Boomstick: After the weirdest adoption ever, Jango trained Boba to become the greatest bounty hunter ever. But after Jango was beheaded on Geonosis, Boba hated the Jedi and decided to help the Seperatists and later on, the Empire.
Wiz: Boba trained under the help of other bounty hunters such as Cad Bane, Aurra Sing and Bossk. This led Boba to become the ultimate bounty hunter. No one could defeat him and he struck fear in those he hunted down.
Boomstick: Barely speaking and freaking the fuck out of his opponents, Boba became the iconic badass he is. But he didn't just become a badass. He earned the hell out of his badassery.
Wiz: Boba comes equipped with Mandolorian armor, that can withstand tempratures up to 25,000 Celcius!
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Boomstick: Isn't that an oddly specific tempreture?
Wiz: That's the tempreture of a lightsaber. Yes, that's right. Boba's armor is strong enough to withstand a LIGHTSABER.
Boomstick: Well yeah! He's killed plenty of Jedi and fought Darth Vader! Twice! His body armor protects him from fire, poison, acid and really cold places. Not to mention he's got a penetrating radar, micro energy shield and a retractable straw! I always wondered how he ate.
Wiz: Out of ALL the things he can do, all you care about is a straw?
Boomstick: Well, haven't you wondered how he eats?
Wiz:... Actually, yes. Anyway, Boba's wrist gauntlets come with a flame thrower, fidercord whip, concussion missiles and stun missiles.
Boomstick: Plus, he's got the LEGENDARY EE-3 Carbine blaster! Ahh... One of my favorite guns in Star Wars. Oh yeah...
Wiz: Not to mention he's uses a jetpack.
Boomstick: A hands-free style jetpack with an anti-vehicle homing rocket, magnetic grappling hook and it can go up to 145 kilometers. That's about 90 miles an hour.
Deadpool vs Boba Fett. Epic Rap Battles of History - Bonus Battle!
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Wiz: He's ripped a tooth out of a Balyeg, kicked down a durasteel door, dodged X and Y wing laser blasts and is so skilled with killing Jedi, he trained Han Solo's daughter!
Boomstick: But he does have that one weakness.
Wiz: The Sarlacc Pit. How does he keep falling in that thing?! It doesn't move!
Boomstick: But he did get out... by getting blown up. But hey, he finds comfort in blowing up the Sarlacc Pit every year on the day of his escape. Hell yeah.
DEATH BATTLE IS SILENCED FOR NEOPOLITAN[]
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Wiz: Roman Torchwick was the face of crime in the kingdom of Vale and at his side, was a mysteriously silent girl with an umbrella called Neopolitan.
Boomstick: Psshh.. What's so tough about her?
Wiz: Have you seen her fight Yang?
Boomstick: ...
Wiz: You've never seen that episode?!
Boomstick: I don't watch a lot of T.V.
Wiz: Whatever. Anyway, at Roman's side, Neo-- What?
Boomstick: What?
Wiz (Fed up with Boomstick's bullshit.): At Roman's side, Neopolitan felt that good, doing evil with her umbrella and deciving appearence.
Boomstick: What the hell does that mean?
Wiz: Well, considering the fact that she's defeated people that can destroy giant robots...
Boomstick: Are kidding me?! She kicked Yang's ass?! How?!
Wiz: Well, let me show you.
Boomstick: Oww...
Wiz: With her small, innocent look, quietness and incredible gracefulness, Neopolitan served very well at Roman Torchwick's side, causing havoc. Let's look at her powers.
Neopolitan, much like every character in the RWBY Universe, uses an aura, which is a force field of energy in the body made from her life-force that allows her to do the following:
- Healing minor injuries,
- use as a force field
- and allows her to activate her Semblance.
Boomstick: Wiz, I'm in pain!!
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Wiz: You deserved it. Neopolitan can use her Semblance, which can create illusions that are visible to everyone but only exist until they are damaged. These illusions do exactly what Neopolitan does, so that they work as a distraction.
Boomstick: So, she can make duplicates? Huh. That's really weird.
Wiz: There's a benefit as you could pretend to beat the shit out of me with this duplicate of me.
Boomstick: Alright! OOOHHH YEAAAAAAAA--
(CLANG!)
Boomstick: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!
Wiz: With her Aura and Semblance, Neopolitan is also a very skilled martial artist, making herself on of the most deadliest fighters in the RWBY universe. With all this, Neopolitan has:
- Fought Cinder Fall with her maiden powers to a standstill,
- Has stated to be stronger than Mercury Black,
- Overpowered Ruby Rose,
- Infiltrated the Atlas Kingdom and the Schnee Manor,
- Stole the Relic of Knowledge twice,
- Has never been captured once,
- Outfought Yang Xiao Long,
- She even rendered her unconscious
- And Neo even managed to break Yang's Aura WITH A SINGLE SWING OF HER UMBRELLA. A GODDAMN UMBRELLA!
Boomstick: How the hell does that work?!
Wiz: I have no idea. Seriously! I have no idea! What even makes less sense then that Neo's biggest fault is HER OWN UMBRELLA.
Boomstick: You've got to be shitting me.
Wiz: No, I'm not. All though her umbrella does come with a sword.
Boomstick: Oh my god.
Maria Vs Neopolitan - Grandma Can Clapback - RWBY Volume 8 (Super-Cut)
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Wiz: I am not joking.
Boomstick: That means...
Wiz: What?
Boomstick: Wiz, I'm getting an umbrella!
Wiz: Seriously?
Boomstick: If it makes Neopolitan the ultimate badass that she is, then it might make me one too!
PRE BATTLE[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set and we've run the data through all possibilities.
Boomstick: ITS TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!!
DEATH BATTLE[]
(In space, Boba Fett pilots the the Slave I, going through a hologram of wanted targets. He comes across one and finds it labeled, "Neopolitan: Wanted for multiple counts of murder, destruction and assult. The price for this bounty is 10,000,000 credits." Looking at the damages of his ship from his last bounty, Boba decides to take the bounty and gets to hunting. Meanwhile Neapolitan is on another planet, killing stormtroopers to steal a ship and escape. Her chance to flee is cut short after she kills the stormtroopers because a giant beam of energy from the sky blowing up the ship. Then the Slave I floats down and lands, Boba exiting the ship. He looks at the piles of stormtrooper corpses.)
Boba Fett: I take it you have no love for the empire.
(He arms himself with the EE-3 Carbine blaster while Neopolitan sits down on a box with a cocky smile on her face. She adjusts her hat and opens her umbrella.)
Boba Fett: Neither do I.
FIGHT!!!
(Firing upon Neopolitan, Boba believed that this would be easy, but she jumps into the air and dodged Boba's gunfire. He kept firing and Neopolitan kept dodging every single blast. Then he had an idea. Putting away his gun, Boba turned around and started to walk away towards the Slave I. With a very large and equally cocky smile on her face, Neopolitan stood straight up and charged at Boba but the jumped out of the way as Boba turned around with a wall of fire. Boba uses his flamethrower and burned the surrounding area that destroyed several boxes willed with weapons, melting them and blowing a couple of them up. Using her Semblance, Neo managed to dodge the fire but then felt something wrapping against her. It was Boba's grapple! Launching himself into the air, Boba flied with Neopolitan hanging behind him, about to put her through hell. He dragged Neopolitan through the fires, burning part of her costume and her umbrella. Then he looked around and saw something that couldn't be there: Another Neopolitan. Confused, Boba looked down and saw the duplicate shatter into glass pieces. Landing in front of Neopolitan, Boba pulled out the EE-3 again, turning on the flamethrower in secret. Boba charged at her, firing the EE-3 again, using the fire with the pistol to attempt to corner her between a row of ship and a control base. Neopolitan smiles as she stands still, letting Boba approach her until he stands about two feet away. Pointing the gun at her head, he sets the duplicate on fire and turns to point the gun at the real Neopolitan, who cuts the EE-3 in half with her umbrella sword. Boba drops the sliced in half gun and blasts off into the air and he pulls out a sniper gun. Pointing at Neopolitan again, he then finds that she has created multiple illusions that all look like duplicates of Neopolitan, only angering Boba further. Blasting the heads off of the duplicates, Boba looks for the real Neopolitan only to suddenly find her umbrella-sword stabbing him in the shoulder, causing him to crash. Blasting his flamethrower at her, Boba stumbles back and takes to the skies again. Trying to fire upon Neopolitan again, Boba aims his sniper rifle at Neopolitan but then spins around and fires a single shot, hitting Neopolitan in the shoulder. She falls to the ground and the bounty hunter lands, ready to finish her off. Neopolitan gets up and runs away.)
Boba Fett: You can run, but you'll only die tired.
(Hiding in the shadows, Neopolitan pulls out her sword, then she stabs Boba in the leg but then disappears with her Semblance. She goes in for another blow but then Boba turns around looking right at her and because her eyes are the only visible part of herself, she closes them. Boba looks around for her eyes, but didn't see them, possibly frustrating him but left unknown because of his helmet. Putting the sniper rifle away, he stood very still while waiting for Neapolitan to attack at any moment. She then jumped at him but then Boba pulled out his lightsaber and sliced Neopolitan's sword in half. Looking at the blade now cut in half, Neopolitan looked at Boba and then fell over, her body falling apart in pieces from the lightsaber. Putting away the saber, Boba carried what was left of her body and put them in carbonite onboard the Slave I. Boba flew back to Tatooine and fired upon the Sarlaac pit from Orbit again. He flew away and collected the bounty on Neopolitan's corpse.)
K.O.!!!
POST BATTLE[]
Boomstick: I thought Boba Fett was silent!
Wiz: Neopolitan almost stood a chance. Her Semblance, silence and her agility could have won this battle.
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Boomstick: But Boba had not only taken down foes far more powerful than her, Boba has been doing this HIS ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE and had MORE BADASS WEAPONS!
Wiz: Sure, Neopolitan fought Cinder to a stand still but Boba fought DARTH VADER TWICE! Boba may have been slower and was less agile, but his heavy amounts of weapons and armors gave him the victory in this situation.
Boomstick: Boba had guns, a lightsaber, grenades and a drinking straw--
Wiz: Still on the drinking straw I see..
Boomstick: but what did Neopolitan have?
Wiz: An umbrella. That's it.
Boomstick: I guess you could say he took this win in an unspeakable way.
Wiz: The winner is Boba Fett.