Death Battle Fanon Wiki


Pokémon Red and Blue vs Pokémon Gold and Silver!!! Which rival will prove superior?!


Wiz: Rivals. Some good some-

Boomstick: ASSHOLES!

Wiz: No game has a greater plethora of rivals than Pokémon.

Boomstick: Blue, rival to Red.

Wiz: And Silver, rival to Ethan. The special rules to this time are that both trainers have their strongest teams and no items allowed.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their...Pokémon, to see who would win a DEATH BATTLE!


Wiz: When Red started out in Pallet Town, he was given a Pokémon by Professor Oak.

Boomstick: But Oak's grandson Blue was also given a Pokémon. Being the "gentleman" he let Red pick first. After Red chose his Charmander, Blue dickishly chose Squirtle. Deliberately.

Wiz: Blue was not the kindest soul. He constantly taunted Red throughout his journey and remained one step ahead of him the whole time, beating every gym leader and becoming the champion of the region.

Boomstick: Until Red beat him.

Wiz: After his defeat he trained, rechallenged the league and became champion again, only because Red wasn't in the building at the time.

Boomstick: Then Red beat him. AGAIN.

Wiz: He may not be able to beat Red but he is a strong trainer. His first Pokémon is his Blastoise, a water type Pokémon that is level 75. It can use Hydro Pump, a powerful water type move, Ice Beam, which can deal damage and freeze foes, Earthquake which causes an...earthquake and rain dance which makes it rain, powering up water type moves. It has the ability Torrent which powers up water type moves when damages enough

Boomstick: He has a Heracross, a bug and fighting Pokémon. This thing powerful! It's Megahorn has him stab his foe with his horn. It's amplified by his ability Swarm that powers up Bug type moves. His other moves include Earthquake, counter where Heracross counters a physical move for double the damage of said physical move, and rock tomb where Heracross drops rocks on the foe and slows them. That's pretty powerful for a fucking BUG of all things...

Wiz: Alakazam is one of the smartest Pokémon EVER with an IQ of 5000. Yet it cant communicate with humans. Anyway, it is level 73 and it can use moves like Psychic, Shadow Ball, Calm Mind and Reflect. It's ability synchronize is something special. Whenever he is affected by a status ailment like poison it is immediately shared with the opponent.

Boomstick: By far his dumbest looking Pokémon is Exeggutor, a level 73 psychic and grass type Pokémon. It can use Giga Drain to damage foes and heal itself at the same time. It can also use psychic and put people to sleep with Sleep Powder. It can use Light Shield to protect itself from special attacks. It's ability is Chlorophyll which increase his speed under intense sunlight. Pretty stupid considering none of his Pokémon even KNOW Sunny Day. Oh well. But seriously look at how stupid he looks!

Wiz: His next Pokémon is Tyranitar

Boomstick: Holy shit since when was Godzilla a fucking Pokémon?!

Wiz: Anyway, Tyranitar is a Rock and Dark type with access to the biting move crunch, earthquake, thunderbolt and....aerial ace? Well anyway aerial ace can never miss, making it a reliable attack. But seriously how can it use that?!

Boomstick: It's Pokémon Wiz. It's Pokémon. Blue's final Pokémon is his level 73 Aracanine, the best dog you'll ever see. One of the best things about this dog is that is shoots fire! Fuck security systems just have this guy sit outside your house! Anyway his moves consist of Extemespeed, which always goes first, Overheat, a powerful fire move that weakens his Special Attack stat, Aerial Ace, and Iron Tail. Iron Tail is pretty self explanatory.

Wiz: Blue is one of the strongest trainers ever. He can give Red a tough battle and beat every single gym leader. He also beat the elite four twice.

Boomstick: But he's extremely cocky. The one redeeming quality about him is that I can name him whatever I want

Boomstick names Blue "Asshat"

Boomstick: Nice.

Blue: Smell you later!


Wiz: After Ethan chose his starter Pokémon Cyndaquil he went off to do an errand for Professor Elm.

Boomstick: The dumbest scientist in video game history. I mean come on he doesn't know where BABIES come from?!

Wiz: Anyway it wasn't long until Gold got an emergency call telling him to hurry back to the lab.

Boomstick: Before he could get there he was stopped by: JACKASS

Wiz: Silver

Boomstick: Awww...

Wiz: Turns out, Silver had stolen a Totodile from Elm.

Boomstick: He's stupid AND gets dangerous creatures stolen from him by 10 year olds? This guy sucks!

Wiz: Anyway Silver was beaten by Ethan over and over and over again.

Boomstick: He always treated his Pokémon like tools of war, which got him nowhere fast.

Wiz: His Pokémon definitely could be used as tools of war. Like Feraligatr, a level 60 water type pokemon. It can use Ice Fang, Crunch, Slash, and Aqua Tail. All pretty much self explanatory. It's ability Torrent powers up it's water moves when at lower health

Boomstick: His trademark Sneasel is a level 55 Dark and Ice type. Although unevolved this thing can pack a punch with it's great speed. It can use Shadow Claw, Faint Attack, Icy Wind and Metal Claw. It's ability Inner Focus prevents it from flinching. I could point a shotgun is this things face and it would be like" I don't care about your fucking shotgun!"

Wiz: His Magneton is a level 55 Steel and electric type Pokémon that can use the moves Discharge, Thunder wave(which can paralyze an opponent), Mirror shot, and Magnet Bomb . All of these are powerful attacks. It's ability, Magnet Pull, prevents steel type opponents from leaving the battle.

Boomstick: His Gengar is a Ghost and Poison type Pokémon at level 56. This thing gives me the creeps. I mean just look at it! Looks like he's plotting to steal my soul or something. This is made worse because it can use moves like Dark Pulse, confuse with Confuse Ray, Shadow Ball, and Sludge Bomb. It can use it's ability levitate to avoid ground type attacks. Keep this fucker away from me at all times.

Wiz: Crobat is a Poison and Flying type Pokémon that also posses the earlier mentioned Inner Focus ability. It can use the attacks Air Slash, Bite, Confuse Ray and Toxic. Toxic poisons the foe and the poison gets worse and worse. Basically if Toxic hits you, you're screwed.

Boomstick: Finally, his Alakazam can use Psychic, Reflect, Focus Blast, and Recover. Focus Blast is basically Pokémon's equivalent of a Hadouken, shooting a fighting type blast of energy. We explained it's ability Synchronize in Blue's analysis.

Wiz: Silver HATES Team Rocket, which is ironic considering his father is the LEADER of the whole organization. He has successfully defeated members of team rocket and every gym leader.

Boomstick: He is arrogant, thinking he's better than everyone around him. Even though he loses. A lot.

Wiz: Still, he is a powerful trainer and should not be underestimated.

Silver: You won, fair and square. I admit it. But this isn't the end. I'm going to be the greatest Pokémon Trainer ever. Because these guys are behind me. …Listen, Ethan. One of these days I'm going to prove how good I am by beating you.

Death Battle[]

Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all.


Silver walks into the champion room, where Blue is standing

Silver: I challenge you to a battle! Prepare to lose!!

Blue: Yeah right, you couldn't beat my GRANDPA in a Pokémon battle!

Silver: Grrrr....



Blue: Go Heracross!

Silver: Alright Sneasel lets go!


Silver: Dodge it and use Shadow Claw!

Blue: Counter it!

Heracross Counters the Shadow Claw and OHKOs Sneasel.


Silver: Shit! Alakazam go!

Blue: Heracross use Earthquake!

Silver: Alakazam back, Gengar out here now!!

Gengar levitates above the attack

Silver: Now Shadow Ball!

The Shadow Ball hits, taking away half of Heracross' health

Blue: Megahorn now!!

Silver: Confuse Ray!

Hercross becomes confused and hits itself

Silver: Now Shadow Ball!

Heracross goes down


Blue: Thinking Damn this guys good! I need to step it up and take this seriously! Talking Alright go Alakazam!

Silver: Shadow Ball again!

Alakazam nearly dies

Silver: Confuse Ray!

Alakazam is confused, but Synchronize confuses Gengar

Silver: Crap!

Blue: Pyschic

Alakazam hits itself and dies


Silver: What was that about your grandpa, asshat?

Blue: Shut up jackass! Go Tyranitar! Use Crunch!

A sandstorm starts

Tyranitar beats Gengar with Crunch


Silver: Dammit! Alright then go Alakazam! Focus Blast

Focus Blast hits and OHKOs Tyranitar because of the dual weakness

Alakazam is hurt by the sandstorm


Blue: Go Exeggutor! Sleep Powder then Giga Drain!

Alakazam falls asleep and is hurt by Giga Drain

Both Pokemon are hurt by the sandstorm

Silver: Wake up you fucking jackass!

Blue: Hit it with another Giga Drain Exeggutor!

Alakazam is defeated after the Giga Drain

Exeggutor is hurt by the sandstorm


Silver: Crobat go! Use Air Slash!

Exeggutor takes a lot of damage

Both Pokémon are hurt by the sandstorm

Blue: Use Giga Drain

Gains little health since Crobat resists the move

Silver: Air Slash one more time!

Exeggutor goes down

Crobat is hurt by the sandstorm


Blue: Alright time for the big guns! Go Blastoise and use rain dance!

It begins to rain

Blue: Now use Hydro Pump!

Blastoise beats Crobat with a powerful jet of water


Silver: GO Magneton!

Blue: Blastoise use Earthquake!

Magenton is defeated


Silver: Feraligatr it's up to you!!!!

Blastoise and Feraligatr stare each other down

Silver: Crunch!

Blue: Hydro Pump!

The Crunch doesn't affect Blastiose very much due to its defenses. The Hydro Pump sends Feraligatr flying across the room.

Blue: Ice Beam!

The move does little damage but it freezes Feraligatr.

Silver: NO!

Blue: Hydro Pump one more time Blastoise!

Feraligatr goes down.


Blue: Looks like I win. Smell you later!

Aracanine incinerates Silver



Boomstick: That was fucking awesome!

Wiz: Blue's Pokémon were higher level, and he is much more experienced than Silver

Boomstick: Looks like Feraligatr got knocked out cold.

Wiz: The winner is Blue