Description[]
Street Fighter vs Friday the 13th, mutated monsters that are doing it for their mother, one for good, one for evil, but who will win a DEATH BATTLE.
Interlude[]
Wiz: Mutated monsters
Boomstick: And they fight to make their mom proud.
Wiz: Blanka, the beast of brazil from Street Fighter.
Boomstick: And Jason Voorhees, the masked killer of Crystal Lake from Friday the 13th He’s Wiz and i’m Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.'
Blanka[]
Wiz: Jimmy Blanka was just your average brazilian boy.
Boomstick: And one day, he decided to go on a trip in a plane. What could possibly go wrong?
Wiz: Well his plane crashed, landing him and all the other passengers in the jungle.
Boomstick: Jimmy was the one that out lasted all of the other survivors, do you think he ate them? I’m just saying, stranded, no food, free meat available.
Wiz: Well he had to camouflage himself in order to survive.
Boomstick: So that's a maybe on the cannibalism then?
Wiz: Well as man of science, it's a definite possibility, he had to get his nutrients from somewhere. But his main food source was electric eels and the jungle was filled with predator animals that could have gotten to them before Blanka did
Boomstick:So humans as a side dish, got it.
Wiz: Because of the camoflauge, his body became green and somehow gained the power of electricity, I mean that's just absurd, there's no electricity in the jungle, how can he possibly get the power to manipulate it, there is literally no scientific explanation for it.
Boomstick: Well if you don't know there's only one person to call. Jocelyn! Wiz's having another scientific meltdown.
The screen comes out.
Jocelyn: So, finally doing a Blanka episode that isn't against Pikachu, what can I help you with this time?
Wiz: How the hell did Blanka get the ability to manipulate electricity, there is no scientific explanation for it.
Jocelyn:By eating enough electric eels which triggered his mutation
Wiz:But the eels would be dead, I need a drink.
Boomstick: I've got beer.
Wiz: No, I need oil.
Boomstick:I knew you were a robot. So Jocelyn, want to take it from here.
Jocelyn: Sure I'll be happy to. Blanka remains mainly docile and protects his jungle, but should anyone threaten him, he's will do anything to protect his land.
Boomstick: Blanka accidently found civilization and entered the street fighter tournament where he was one of the best fighters in the tournament
Jocelyn: Thanks to his moves like the beast roll, where he spins through the air, and shout of earth in which he literally shouts electric bolts at his opponents.
Boomstick: Good thing Wiz's still not here, he'll be losing his mind at that.
Jocelyn: However his only training comes from Dan Hibiki. Enough said.
Boomstick: But Blanka is still a formidable fighter that has survived all sorts of things in the jungle
Jason Voorhees[]
Wiz: Jason Voorhees was born literally big headed and mentally challenged thanks to a cranial deformity known as Hydrocephalus which is basically too much water buildup in a brain canal.
Boomstick: Because of that, he was sheltered at home, so much that his parents didn't even allow him to go to school.
Wiz: But when they couldn't pay a babysitter enough, thanks inflation, Jason was sent to Camp Crystal Lake.
Boomstick: Hoping Jason could actually gain something from talking to other kids, didn't work because the kids were making fun of his big head, because kids are mean.
Wiz: The kids ran Jason into the lake, and he drowned. End of movie. Just kidding.
Boomstick Everyone's seen at least one friday the 13th movie, they know you were kidding. But where was the camp counselors in all of this,having sex with each other, don't hate the playa, hate the game.
Wiz: Decades later, his sprit came back and he decided, if he died at crystal lake, then everyone else should.
Boomstick: He does it every Friday the 13th, so i guess if you attend crystal lake sometime else, he doesn't care.
Wiz:Jason has been able to walk though straight gunfire easily.
Boomstick: He has a healing factor which allows him to recover from wounds and keep on killing.
Wiz: And he can teleport, at least in the video game at least. The movies, well no concrete evidence to suggest either way.
Boomstick: And Jason's murder weapon of choice is the machete, using it to hack and slash and kill.
Wiz:He can rip people apart with his bare hands and he can make a weapon out of anything in his environment.
Boomstick: He's smart enough to set traps to leech his victims and his victims are dumb enough to walk into them.
Wiz: He can regenerate from having his heads and limbs being blown up
Boomstick: Jason always seems to find a way to come back, even when the odds are against him,put this guy against springtrap.
Wiz: But he is plagued by his mother's voice in his brain.
Boomstick: And he's slow, very slow. Slower than my ex-wife was in bed.
Wiz: But he holds the world record for most kills by a horror movie character for a reason,, he will make sure he will get all his victims.
Boomstick:Except for Tommy Jarvis, Ginny Field, Megan Garris, the list goes on and on.
Wiz: Alright , the combatants are set! We’ve run the data through all possibilities!
Boomstick It's time for a DEATH BATTLE
DEATH BATTLE[]
The Jungle, overgrown with grass, trees almost covering the sun.
Blanka heard a noise,rusting in the trees, he peered, out of curiosity to see a hockey masked man, Jason Voorhees. Jason got out his machete. Blanka could see, Jason was bad news. He had to fight back, to preserve his home.
Blanka growled at Jason, hoping it would ward him off. It didn't, Jason swung his Machete at Blanka, for Blanka to narrowly dodge it, the machete coming close to cutting off his hair.
Blanka, span through the air, hitting Jason with enough force to hit him back into a tree.
Jason wasn't phased, in fact, he was hoping it would happen. Jason ripped the tree from the ground and threw the entirety of it at Blanka.
Blanka shouted bolts at the tree, splitting it in half. Blanka took his half and kicked it towards Jason, who didn't move out of the way fast enough, so the trunk of the tree hit him.
Blanka looked around, hoping, whoever that masked man was had retreated, but he came back out from the trees.
Jason lunged forward with his machete, grabbing Blanka, cutting in his arm, blood bleeding out. He managed to break free from Jason's grip by electrocuting him with his electric shock attack. The shock temporarily stunned Jason, enough for Blanka to escape
Despite the pain from his arm wound, Blanka knew he couldn't back down. This jungle was his home, and he wouldn't let anyone, especially a relentless and evil force like Jason Voorhees, destroy it.
With a fierce roar, Blanka charged at Jason, He landed a series of quick strikes on Jason's chest, causing the masked killer to stagger backward. However, Jason' recovered from the assault.
,Blanka electrified the surrounding trees and bushes, turning the jungle into an electrified maze. Blanka darted through the electrified plants with ease, while Jason struggled to keep up, getting zapped each time he tried to follow.
As Jason pushed forward, he seemed to relish the pain, his determination to kill Blanka overriding any concern for his own well-being. Blanka realized that this battle wasn't just physical; it was also psychological. Jason couldn't be stopped by mere pain or exhaustion.
As Jason relentlessly pursued, Blanka noticed that his machete was getting caught in the electrified vines and branches, slowing him down. Blanka seized the opportunity and launched a fierce barrage of electric attacks, aiming to wear down Jason.
Seeing that pure strength and electricity alone wouldn't be enough to defeat Jason, Blanka decided to try a different approach. He lured Jason to an open clearing, where moonlight filtered through the thick canopy of trees.
Although the jungle had no lakes, there was a small river nearby. With a burst of speed, Blanka dashed to the river and taunted Jason, daring him to follow.
Fueled by rage and determination, Jason hesitated for a moment, but his thirst for vengeance overpowered his fear. He stepped into the shallow river, his breathing heavy and labored.
Blanka took advantage of the situation and led Jason further into the water, making it difficult for him to maintain his footing. The electrified jungle now posed a significant threat to Jason, with water amplifying the effect of the electricity. Blanka sent electricity into the water, shocking Jason. He fell to the ground, motionless.
Blanka had won, or so it seemed. Blanka turned his back, and he heard footsteps, he looked, right into Jason as he gouged Blanka's head off.
Analysis[]
Boomstick: Oh come on, can't Blanka win any of his matches?
Wiz: This was a somewhat close matchup, Blanka definitely had the speed advantage over Jason, but that wasn't enough to outstat Jason.
Boomstick: Jason has insane durability, being able to walk through gunfire and he always seems to come back, no matter what.
Wiz: And while Blanka did give Jason a good run for his money, he really had no answer to Jason's healing factor or regeneration.
Boomstick: Blanka could hurt Jason to get him to a point where he needs to heal or regenerate, but once he does, there was really no stopping Jason from getting the kill.
Wiz: Jason's durability and regeneration is what gave him the victory.
Boomstick:Looks like Blanka got 'shocked' by Jason Voorhees! It was a 'killer' match in the jungle, but Jason 'macheted' his way to victory!"
Wiz: The winner is Jason Voorhees
Connections[]
two Savage Brutal but Simple Subhumans that Reside in Remote locations (Amazon and Crystal Lake)
Both Started off As Ordinary but Deformed People (Blanka was A Extremely Pale Brazilian boy and Jason has Hydrocephalus) that Have Extremely Difficult Lives (Blanka survived a plane crash and survived his entire life on the dangerous places on the world Amazon's and became feral while Jason was bullied for his condition and drowned)
Both came back strong but even more deformed (Blanka got orange hair and green skin and electrical Powers while Jason came back as a Zombie and got unexplained powers)
Both Despite their Viciousness are Suprisingly territorial and don't engage in conflict (Blanka is shy and doesn't fight unless threatened and Jason as long he is alone doesn't harm anyone)
Both of them Really Love their mothers and will do anything for them and most of their motivations stem for then (Blanka wants his mother to be proud of him and Jason kills because he believes he is making her proud)