| Excellent! | |
|---|---|
| Season | 1 |
| Season Episode | 7 |
| Air date | I don’t want to put anything in here |
| Written by | Cheesypickles564 |
| Episode guide | |
| Previous Griffith VS Berkut |
Next Gru vs Megamind |
Traversing through time has never been this groovy! Bill and Ted vs Doc and Marty is a Death Battle by Cheesypickles564 featuring Bill S. Preston and Ted “Theodore” Logan from Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure and Doctor Emmet Brown and Marty McFly from Back to the Future in a battle between two 80’s time travelers.
Description[]
BATEA vs BTTF! These two 80’s time travelers are ready to strut their stuff in a Death Battle! Will Doc and Marty run out of time, or will Bill and Ted not perform excellently?
Interlude[]
Puppy: Time travel. One of the oldest theories known to man. To be able to cross through the literal fabric of space and time and discover unknown things about the past.
Kitty: But let’s go to the 80’s, they have the grooviest and most swag time travelers in all of pop culture!
Puppy: Please don’t tell me you’re going to speak like a hippie for the entire episode…
Kitty: Too bad!
Puppy: Oy vey. Anyways, time travelers like Bill and Ted, the Wyld Stallyns.
Kitty: And Doc and Marty, the car-driving duo of Back to the Future! He’s Puppy and I’m Kitty!
Puppy: And it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win… a Death Battle.
Kitty: Hot dog! Now gimme some skin, soul brothah!
Puppy: sigh…
Bill and Ted Have an Excellent Adventure in Death Battle![]
(Cue: Big Pig - I Can't Break Away)
Kitty: The year is 2688. The air is clean, the water’s clean and somehow, the dirt is clean. Bowling averages are way up, and mini-golf scores are way down.
Puppy: And we have more excellent water slides than any other planet we communicate! Yeah, life in the future’s quite the bees knees, but there was a chance of it not being this way!
Kitty: 700 years ago, in the small town of San Dimas, California, there lived two rockin’ yet extremely unintelligent teens, Bill and Ted.
Bill: I’m Bill S. Preston Esquire!
Ted: And I’m Ted “Theodore” Logan!
Both: And we’re the “Wyld Stallyns!”
Puppy: Why are we doing this again?
Kitty: Bill S. Preston Esquire’s gotta be the coolest name ever…
Puppy: Ugh. Anyways, don’t let their appearances fool you; they may be incompetent, with Ted believing Joan of Arc was Noah’s wife, but to this excellent future, they are the key.
Kitty: But it almost wasn’t that way- The bane of every schoolchild’s existence, homework, got in the way of their musical dreams, and due to their terrible grades, they had one last chance to not flunk, and that was a history report. For some reason, flunking would cause the universe to fall apart.
Puppy: And Rufus, an excellent person from the future, set out in an adventure back in time to help these “Great Ones”, as the future people put it.
Kitty: So Rufus went back in time and bestowed upon them the greatest power known to man- a phone booth! Well, a phone booth that can travel through time. That seems pretty cliché.
Puppy: This phone booth is capable of doing impressive things- it can weave through the time streams with the help of their handy-dandy phone book, which lists different times, but as phone numbers.
Kitty: This booth really is the bees knees, they can kidnap people with it! A pretty respectable art if I do say so myself.
Puppy: What my incompetent friend means to conduct is that the time machine can be used to go back in time and grab people from the past, like what Bill and Ted did to multiple historical figures to help their assignment and create a radical Halloween party,
Kitty: Meh, same idea.
Puppy: Sigh. Anyways, they’re really not so tough. They’re inexperienced in fighting and physically weak. With their time machine, Bill and Ted have gained God’s enlightenment… what?
Kitty: That’s just the tip of the iceberg! With the time machine, they’ve picked up multiple pop-culture figures, tanked bullets from gunmen and patched up holes in reality… by playing music!
Puppy: Yeah, about that last feat you listed, Bill and Ted can use their music to heal people from near-fatal wounds and stun robots!
Kitty: See, I told that guy in the Denny’s parking lot that music was magical! He owes me five smackaroos!
Puppy: Bill and Ted’s music is as powerful as their time machine- they’ve ended war, poverty and made world peace by playing guitar.
Kitty: Why don’t we form a band? You’ve got the smarts, and I’ve got the mosh-skills! It’s been a long time since I’ve killed someone at a concert.
Puppy: …we don’t need to delve into your personal life. Bill and Ted also have combat and wits to boot; they’ve beaten Death in a game of battleship, dodged bullets and defeated the robot dictators that killed them! This gets more confusing the further we go in…
Kitty: They’ve also prevented Napoleon Bonaparte from conquering both Heaven and Hell, and defeated their foe Chuck, who downright conquered Earth! They’re also physically strong enough to create sounds out of thin air by doing an air guitar!
Kitty attempts at an air guitar, but trips and kicks over a table.
Kitty: Oww… my back…
Puppy: Get up, slacker.
Kitty: Ouch… apart from these, wild to say the least, feats, Bill and Ted are still human in the end. They’re able to be killed by normal means if they’re not careful. Plus, the sheer misspelling of their band’s title should give you a hint of how incompetent they are…
Puppy: But, despite any odds, the Wyld Stallyns will push on, mainly through dumb luck.
Bill: "I don't know. Philosophize with him!"
Ted: "All we are is dust in the wind, dude."
Doc and Marty Go Back To Death Battle![]
(Cue: Back to the Future)
Puppy: Marty McFly was always your average 80’s teenager. He had self esteem issues, obsessed over rock and roll bands and he feared he would never amount to anything.
Kitty: But he had something that nobody else he knew did- actual friends!
Puppy: Well, not a friend, per se, but Marty found a role model in the shape of Hill Valley’s elderly and wily inventor, Emmet P. Brown.
Kitty: Marty and Emmet made quick friends, but one fateful night when Marty was playing his guitar, a bully broke in, in gimme your lunch money fashion and tried to steal his Inceroctoror tube!
Puppy: It’s pronounced Interocitor. Anyways, after the bully broke the hardware, Marty decided it would be a good idea to break into Doc’s house and find a tube.
Kitty: His plan was going oh so smoothly until he came face-to-face with the doctor himself!
Puppy: Instead of giving him a scolding or even a beating, the doctor offered Marty a job as an assistant.
Kitty: For years, Marty helped Doc with his crazy and wacky inventions until the fateful night he decided to build… A TIME MACHIIIIIIIIINNNNNEEEEE!!!
Puppy: But for some strange reasons involving shady dealings, Emmet was gunned down by some crooks and Marty was forced to go back in time and revive him, but not after a few faults.
Kitty: A few faults? He was literally erased from existence!
Puppy: Fine. A lot of faults.
Kitty: Luckily, with the help of the TIME MACHIIIIINNNNEEE, Marty was able to ensure a future where Doc wasn’t dead, and all was stable.
Puppy: …no. They ended up going on multiple more adventures through time, resulting in not-that-great sequels and Doc and Marty gaining some skills!
Kitty: For example, Marty amassed skills in shooting, driving and planning! But none of this could be achieved without the help of their… TIME MACHIIIIIIIINNNNNEEE!!!
Puppy: Please stop…
Kitty: As you know, this TIME MACHIIIIIIIINE is capable of going back and forward into time, but there’s more it can do! It can- wait, no… it can only go back in time… that’s cheap.
Puppy: It is a time machine, what more would you expect.
Kitty: I think you mean… TIME MACHIIIIIIIINE!!!
Puppy: Ugh… anyways, despite Marty’s various skills in fighting, Doc is no slouch either. He built a time machine, and has plenty of smarts to protect him in combat.
Kitty: Now, as for feats, Marty has reacted to rockets and speeding baseballs! The rocket was moving at 17000 mph, meaning that’s a speed he can excel!
Puppy: Both Marty and Doc, however, have done even more impressive speed-based feats! They’ve dodged lasers, lightning, point-blanks gunshots, bears, and more! He’s also survived a fall down a large slope, being hit by multiple cars and being erased from existence! Oh…
Kitty: And don’t forget, good ol’ Doc Brown scales to these wonky feats!
Puppy: But Marty’s greatest skill is definitely his improvisation. He’s used skateboards, guitars and other odd things to beat the shit out of anyone who fights him.
Kitty: This time-traveling duo also has pickaxes, matches, a tire iron, all purpose cleanser and even chloroform!
Puppy: Both Doc and Marty are however, still human. Just like the previous duo, they can be put down if they don’t care too much about defenses. And despite the stuff they’ve pulled off, they’re still incompetent to say the least.
Kitty: But they’ve overcome the odds- and no matter what stupid adventures they’re thrown into, they’ll always stick together!
Marty McFly: Wait a minute, Doc, are you telling me you built a time machine out of a DeLorean?
Doc Brown: The way I see it, if you’re going to build a time machine out of a car, why not do it in style?
Intermission[]
Puppy: Alright, the combatants are set, and we've run the data through all possibilities. Feel free to vote for who you believe will win in the poll we’ve made.
Kitty: But now! IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!
Pre-Fight[]
The camera first shows a beautiful, mid-summer day with a pristine horizon, only to descend down towards a school. The banners suddenly fall down as the faculty finish putting them up, with the barely legible words, “Science Fair” being seen on the banner.
Inside the hall, large amounts of people mingle and look at each other’s projects. Some looking in disgust, and some being shocked and left speechless.
One group seems to be center stage, however; two teenagers, one with a white sweatshirt and curly hair, with the other sitting by his side, flashing around his dark hair.
“Step right up, step right up!” The yellow-haired boy yells. “Come see… Napoleon Bonaparte, straight from the 1800s!”
The boys run off to adjacent sides, with the phone booth sitting behind them being more visible. Out walks a short man in French battle clothing.
“Boo!” A student yells. “You did Napoleon last year!” The crowd suddenly breaks apart and Bill and Ted are left alone.
“Bogus, dude…” Ted slowly muses, brushing his black hair away. “We’ve lost our touch!”
“Most miserably…” Bill sighs. He looks at the crowd and spots two people- one a boy their age in a red jacket and jeans, and the other, an old man in a white jumpsuit. Conveniently, they were being handed first prize.
“Ted, Dude!” Bill yells, suddenly waking Ted up. “It’s the winners!”
Both boys run toward them, their heads turning red. They see the winning project, a silver DeLorean with minor adjustments.
Bill suddenly raises his voice. “Dude! What’s so special about a car?”
Doctor Emmett P. Brown hears the question and pushes the crowd away. “Why, it’s a time machine!” He informs.
“Bogus!” Ted yells. “We’ve got a time machine, and we still didn’t win!”
Bill’s fury suddenly releases as he punches the stout old man in the nose, knocking him over.
“Gee, Doc! Are you okay?” Marty McFly, the other winner inquires. He lifts Doc up and punches Bill back.
“Dude, are ya looking for a fight?” Ted asks.
“You started it!” Marty yells back.
Fight![]
(Cue: Back to the Excellent Future - Fan Made Death Battle Track)
Both duos leap at each other, with one of them fighting one of the opposing duo’s members.
Bill swiftly swung his fist towards Marty, who stumbled back and hit the table behind him, knocking over some unfortunate soul’s science project. Bill tries to roundhouse kick Marty, but he somersaults backwards and flips the table up, running forward and ramming Bill into a wall, knocking over more science projects.
Glue splashes everywhere as Bill and Marty claw at each other mercilessly. They knock over baking-soda volcanos, poster-boards and other contraptions. Bill ducks under one of Marty’s swings and jabs his gut, startling the time-traveler and sending him falling backward into a ring of tables, each housing a baking-soda volcano.
Bill lets out a scratchy battle cry before bounding towards Marty. Marty looks around him to improvise… “Got it!” He thinks.
As Bill is rapidly approaching, Marty frantically mixes baking soda into a big bowl. As soon as Bill was an arms-length away from Marty, he titled the volcano downward, poured in his solution, and with a “BAM!”, Bill was blasted through another mess of projects by a big, white stream erupting from the conical top of the volcano.
Simultaneously, Ted and Doc are clashing. Well, not as much clashing as Doc evading Ted’s attacks.
“C’mon, bonehead! Come n’ get some!” Ted yells at the estranged doctor, throwing multiple science projects off of tables and towards Emmett. He swiftly cowers and dodges the thrown items before continuing his run from Ted.
The doctor trips on a streamer that fell from the highly decorated ceiling and rolls on the floor before coming to a stop. He slowly gets back up to his feet as Ted slips down the hall, holding a guitar.
“I’m too old for this!” Doc yells as he dives away. Ted begins to play some special notes, and a beam of light shoots toward the doctor. Emmett was able to barely outmaneuver it, but multiple other projects weren’t so lucky and ended up as nothing but crisps.
Marty and Bill spot the guitar-beam as they were in the middle of strangling each other and leap to adjacent sides. The beam blasts to where they once stood and eviscerates a large part of the hall.
“Woah… that’s odd.” Marty proclaims, hitting Bill with a skateboard he fished out from under a table.
“You’re telling me!” Bill replies in angst, swinging a lone table leg at Marty.
The beam tore through tables and projects, with one table smashing to the floor and leaving dust in it’s wake. Ted was unknowingly on a rampage until he got hit by a rock.
Doc was standing near a geology project, tossing different types of minerals and rocks at Ted. The guitarist barely managed to weave through the stones and perform a roll on the floor, before strumming his guitar and creating another beam that struck Doc’s leg.
Marty reels back and grabs a burlap sack of rocks which he tosses at Bill, barely missing his head. Bill leaps forward and kicks Marty, only for the time-traveler to grab his foot and swing Bill around, eventually tossing him into the side of the auditorium.
Bill slams into the side of the Phone Booth, before slumping down. He clutched his chest as he stood back up. He looks around the Phone Booth for something to use. Bingo! He picks up a record player and a case full of Val Halen. “Maybe I can swoon him into not fighting me with some music!” Bill says to himself.
(Cue: Unchained - Van Halen)
Marty stops. Was that Van Halen? He slowly moved forward to hear. He started banging his head; based on instinct and rocking out.
“Dude, are you a Van Halen fan?” Bill asks his former assailant.
“Heck yeah!” Marty yells. “Truce?” Bill asks.
Marty obliged without mulling it over. He climbed up to the stage that the Phone Booth was perched on and reached out his hand- which Bill met with his own.
Both shook hands and all seemed well… until Bill used his grasp on Marty’s hand to get the upper hand and toss him away, causing the time traveler to hit his back on a wall!
(Resumes: Back to the Excellent Future- Fan-Made Death Battle Track)
“Oh come on…” Marty groans as he gets back up.
Ted runs towards the elderly doctor at a breakneck speed, fumes shooting out of his nose like a bull chasing a red cloth.
Doc barely evades him by taking multiple shortcuts through the auditorium. He pauses near a fruit stand and grabs a few apples for ammunition. Ted darts toward Doc from far away, but the doctor was ready. “An apple a day won’t keep this doctor away!” He says, juggling the fruits and tossing them at Ted, each on hitting the guitarist, with the last one clocking his crotch.
Ted falls down, clasping that area— with a large scream, he falls to the floor, playing dead for absolutely no reason.
Bill swipes the tablecloth off of the table and flaps it at Marty, creating a gust of wind that blows at the time-traveler. Marty slides on the floor, letting the wind blow him back, and he grabs a handful of syringes from someone’s project and throws them at Bill, pushing against his shirt and pinning him against the wall. Marty slowly approaches Bill with closed fists, but before he can punch him, Bill shakes the tablecloth around with his feet, causing Marty to wiggle violently before falling on his back.
Ted gets back up to his feet and rolls toward Doc, grabbing him by the hair and kneeing his ribs. He tosses the elderly man into a row of projects, knocking them down like bowling pins. The doctor lets out a humorous “Doh!” as he crashes into the tables.
The doctor reaches his bruised hand out in hopes of grabbing something to use against his assailant. He suddenly grabs on to something! It was a ray gun— a suspicious science project for an elementary school child.
The doctor would, however, put it to good use anyways! He pointed it towards Ted and pulled the trigger, barely missing Ted, but eviscerating the area behind him.
“Woah! What was that?” Ted asks, clearly confused at the intensity of what had just happened.
Suddenly, a bruised Bill is kicked across the area near Ted. “C’mon, Ted… if we go quickly, we can get to the booth and blow this taco stand!”
“Alright, dude!” Ted replies, running towards the device. Doc opens fire once more, each beam barely missing the other duo.
“Curse these shaky fingers!” He yells.
Bill and Ted enter the booth. They enter the coordinates in and try to get to a time before this whole accident.
Suddenly, the DeLorean drives toward them at impressive speeds, crashing into the phone booth and sending both devices to unplanned times!
•••
The hunters throw their spears at the beast. The velociraptor barely evades the Neanderthal’s attacks. It hides in a mundane, open field, letting out a big sigh of relief.
Suddenly, the sky opens up and a phone booth and a car beam down, completely splattering the dinosaur into a mess of blood and organs.
“Eeww…” Bill says, stepping on the beast’s heart.
“Well, this wasn’t what we were going for, but at least we escaped that school!”
“Yeah!” Bill and Ted both do their signature air-guitars, when suddenly, they’re interrupted by a punch from Marty.
“Oh come on!” Ted yells, landing in the red mess.
(Cue: Back to the Excellent Future- Fan Made Death Battle Track)
Bill helps Ted up, and both duos charge violently at each other. Bill kicks Marty, who falls backward and knocks Doc down. Both of them roll down a cliff, and Bill and Ted follow.
As soon as Doc and Marty get up, Bill and Ted are right down with them. Ted knees Doc in the gut, before throwing the elderly man down to the floor and stomping on his chest.
“Woah, Ted!” Bill yells, completely confused. “It’s most unethical to do that to an old man.” Bill says, holding his chest up. “Just because we’re fighting, doesn’t mean we have no morals, dude!”
“Sorry!” Ted offers his hand to the old man and helps him up, Doc gets back on his feet, only to deliver a punch to Ted’s jaw.
“I’m not that old!”
“Now do we get to punch him?” Ted says, getting up and wiping blood from his jaw.
“Totally, dude.”
Ted swings his foot at Marty, who bounds backwards and kicks Ted’s ribs before pushing his head down.
“Say uncle!” Marty says, before knocking Ted away with a roundhouse kick.
Ted flies into the air and his head smashes against a beehive. Multiple bees flood out and both Marty and Ted try to evade them.
“This is not good!” Marty says, leaping from rock to rock trying to escape the bees. He grabs a rock, quartz to be specific, and throws it at Ted, knocking him into the bees. Ted puts his thumb up and makes a reference.
“I’ll be back!”
Marty leans himself against a tree. “Phew. I’d just better hope that guy’s allergic to bees.”
Suddenly, the shattered bits of the beehive fly out from the swarm and hit Marty in the head. Honey drips down from his scalp. Marty puts a finger in it and tastes it.
“Hmm… this is actually pretty good!”
Immediately after Marty said that, three brown bears leap from the bushes and show their claws.
“OH COME ON!”
Bill somersaults forward and strums the guitar he grabbed from the science fair. Doc gets a case of deja vu and ducks. The beam misses and rebounds after hitting a rock, causing it to clock Bill in the face.
Doc flails his arms around in an effort to actually deal some damage, and harms Bill whilst he’s recovering.
Bill winces in pain and strums the guitar again. Doc tries to retreat, but he’s struck in the leg.
“It’s over for you!” Bill says, kicking Doc back further.
Out of nowhere, Marty with a beehive on the top of his head and three bears chasing him runs across the area where Doc and Bill were fighting. Marty tosses the beehive at Bill, striking him in the head.
“This is most dubious…” Bill says, his earlier enthusiasm dropping.
“Marty- Marty I’ve got an idea…” Doc slowly crawls toward a scratch-covered Marty.
“What is it, Doc?”
“We can go forward in time, so that even if they end up winning this fight, we can help our future selves beat them, and therefore claim victory!”
“Gee, that’s a great idea!” Marty says. “I’ll stall them while you get the DeLorean running.”
Marty hops up as Doc crawls toward the car. Marty starts shaking his arms around violently, making stupid noises.
A sting-covered Ted rises up, and Bill climbs out of a watering hole, having washed the honey off of himself.
“Dude… what’s that idiot doing now?”
Ted gasps, trying to ease the pain the stings bring. “I dunno. It might be a trap.”
Bill looks down at Ted. “Ted, I’ve got a most bodacious idea…” he grins slyly. “Let’s spring the trap, but be prepared for whatever they have coming.”
“But they might kill us!” Ted wheezes. “From my most excellent experiences in movie-watching, I know that springing a trap is never a good idea… let’s do it!”
Bill and Ted grab sticks and stones- enough resources to help them in a fight. They both dart towards Marty, who continues making the noises.
“Doc, are you almost done… they’re coming closer!”
“Almost, chum!” Doc says. He activates the motor.
Bill and Ted leap towards the car. They start feverishly punching the windshield. The car suddenly starts moving, and it knocks both of the Wyld Stallyns to the ground at a high speed.
•••
Bill wakes up. “Ooh… what happened.”
“It didn’t work, Doc! Why not?”
“You see, Marty… I set it to 87 miles per hour, not 88. A sorry mistake on my part.”
“Mistake? You just killed the black-haired one!”
These words rung in Bill’s ears. No. They couldn’t have.
A wave of adrenaline crashes over Bill. He stands up, face rage with anger.
“…You killed Ted. GODDAMNIT YOU DICKWADS! YOU KILLED TED!”
(Cue: Back to the Excellent Future- Fan Made Death Battle Track)
Bill furiously dashes up to Doc and Marty, and with a newfound burst of strength, kicks both away with ease.
Bill takes Marty first, setting him up against the Phone Booth. He punches him angrily in the gut before hoisting him up by his collar.
“This is NOTHING compared to what Ted felt!”
Bill throws Marty to the side, causing the blood-soaked, bruise-covered teen to wriggle in pain.
Bill turns his head around, raising his eyebrow towards Doc.
“You too shall feel the pain I brought on your friend, dude!”
Bill feverishly dashes towards Doc and delivers a kick to his face. The doctor barely manages to dodge it whilst muttering his catchphrase, “Great Scott!” Bill turns around once more and reels his fist back, delivering a massive uppercut to the doctor’s face.
The doctor falls to the ground, clutching his wound. A still angered Bill grabs both Doc and Marty by the hair and sets them up against the DeLorean.
“This was the machine that killed Ted… now I will make you suffer most deservingly!”
“T-that’s not a word…” Marty says, coughing out blood.
Bill smashes both’s heads into the car, creating multiple lumps in the hull. The Wyld Stallyn begins to maniacally laugh before thrusting Doc’s face into the front.
Suddenly, a ring of fire appeared, and another DeLorean zipped out, ramming into Bill and sending him flying into his time machine, somehow activating it and sending Bill into the past.
The time machine’s doors open up, and Doc and Marty walk out.
“We have come from 10 seconds into the future to save you.” Doc begins, before walking back into the car.
“Wait— gather people from throughout history before that kid returns, it’ll help ya!” Marty says, high-fiving his past self before running into the DeLorean. The time machine burst into light and disappeared.
Almost immediately after that, the phone booth returned, but it was noticeably more crowded than it was before. The doors opened up, and multiple armies of warriors and historical figures rushed out, with Bill and a resurrected Ted leading the charge!
“Like, thanks for bringing me back, dude!” Ted says. “Being dead probably hurt, like, a lot.”
Bill and Ted do an air guitar before leading the charge, holding their guitars in hand.
“G-great Scott, Marty.” Doc stutters, stumbling backwards.
Almost immediately after Doc talked, 10 DeLorean’s burst through the arena, and out of the cars came… more Docs and Martys?
“Gee, Doc. Guess we’ve got an army now!” Marty says, before pointing forward and the multiple alternate versions of them rush through the battlefield.
Chaos ensues almost immediately after. Abraham Lincoln pulls out a sawed-off shotgun and shoots an alternate Marty’s head into Swiss cheese, only for Doc, who was holding a sharp rock, to cleave him in half.
Bill ran through the chaotic battlefield, holding his guitar. He strummed a few notes, which shot out a beam of light that disintegrated a large majority of the other army.
Ted and Marty were in a fistfight, only for Ted to kick Marty’s crotch and punch him whilst he was distracted. Marty stumbles backward and wipes his lip, snapping his fingers. Three alternate Docs sprung into action and started beating Ted in various places, but in a fit of rage, Ted shook them all off of him.
Sigmund Freud and Albert Einstein both formed an alliance amidst the chaos, and pulled out machetes, clawing their ways through hordes of Docs and Martys.
Michael Jackson moonwalked through the battlefield, only to be knocked to the ground by the real Marty, who dashed through the hordes and grabbed the real Doc, who was playing chess against Einstein, and they both took refuge under a log.
“Marty…” Doc stuttered, mouth stuffed with dust and blood. “Marty… we need… to g-get the DeLorean…”
Doc continued, coughing blood up. “We c-can… go and hit their phone booth… a-and prevent their army from even showing up…”
Marty nodded silently, before rolling out of the log. In the brief moment that Doc and Marty strategized in, the area had already become a desolate shadow of what it once was. Marty barely weaved passed blasts from Bill’s guitar and opened the car’s door. He looked ahead and saw the Phone Booth, standing pristine amidst the chaos.
Marty sighed and stomped on the gas, zooming through the battlefield, crushing Docs, Martys, Dictators and presidents. Suddenly, a hand from the back of the car grabbed Marty’s shoulder. It was Ted who had somehow found his way into the car.
When the two were grasping at the steering wheel, the DeLorean overturned and hit the real Doc and the real Bill, rolling towards the Phone Booth and crashing into it. In a high-frequency blast that eviscerated the entire area, the two machines were gone, without a trace.
The two machines bashed against each other, cracks and scratches showing up all over the devices. After taking heavy damage from the DeLorean ramming into their phone booth, Bill gets an idea.
He reaches for a guitar in the booth and opens the booth’s door… with one lucky shot, he hits the DeLorean, shocking the machine and disabling it. “Goodbye, dickwads!” Bill yells, before putting in new directions for the booth. In mere seconds, the phone booth is gone.
Doc desperately tries to activate the DeLorean, but the machine wouldn’t budge! In an explosion of green light, Doc and Marty are also gone.
The busted DeLorean reappears in a null, black void full of… well, nothing. Marty and Doc both sit back and take in what just happened.
“D-doc, where are we?” Marty says, wiping blood from his lip.
“I know where we are, kid, but I don’t want to tell you…”
Suddenly, in the distance, a large flash appears, gradually growing and getting closer to the two.
“Doc, IS THAT THE BIG BANG?!”
Suddenly, the two are bombarded with the light, and quickly erased from existence.
KO!
Ending Screen A: Bill and Ted return to the science fair, only to see their school in shambles. They both give each other “We shouldn’t have done that.” looks before doing an air-guitar.
Ending Screen B: The universe was just created. Doc and Marty, having been caught in the blast, were torn apart. Constellations of them screaming were scattered across space.
Conclusion[]
Kitty: W-w-what the hell just happened? I need a beer, oy vey.
Puppy: This match was definitely on the… weirder side of the spectrum to say the least.
Kitty: For starters, the two had multiple excellent ways to traverse through time, but one of them was ultimately superior.
Puppy: Sure, the DeLorean is pretty powerful, being able to fly and all, but the Phone Booth is not only easier to activate on a tight schedule, but Doc and Marty had no way to actually disable their time travel, which Bill and Ted fortunately could do to their opponents.
Popup: Since their stun-guitar moves are capable of pausing a robot’s actions for a short period of time, there’s no reason why they wouldn’t be able to do it to another electric device like the DeLorean.
Kitty: And sure, The Back to the Future duo could technically outsmart them in most scenarios, having someone who’s actually competent on their team. But, however, the fact that the so-called “Smarter person” of their group was extremely lacking in combat experience, or ways to fight at all.
Puppy: But Bill and Ted aren’t exactly crushed in this contest of wits, however. They have outsmarted the literal embodiment of death, which means they’re competent, even if it’s a small amount of competence in them. So, Bill and Ted could just completely eviscerate the other duo via overall combat experience and power output, but some facts thrown in make this trickier.
Kitty: Not only were Doc and Marty massively faster than Bill and Ted, but their time travel could actually be utilized in a combat scenario! I really don’t think you can ram into someone with a phone booth.
Puppy: But, Bill and Ted’s power output not only trumped those higher stats, with one of their combat priorities being able to patch up holes in reality, but they were also durable enough to withstand what the other duo could dish out.
Kitty: Doc and Marty had a Wyld battle.
Puppy: …seriously? That’s it? I’ve grown to expect a lot more from you.
Kitty: Aww, but I wasn’t DeLor-even trying on this one! We were just Outta Time!
Puppy: That’s better. The winners are Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan.
Next Time[]
Gru: We are going to steal…
Megamind: Oh, you’re a villain alright…
Gru: The Moon!
Megamind: Just not a super one!
Trivia[]
- The connections between these duos are that they’re duos from the 80’s who time travel in a modified version of an everyday appliance. Said time travel machines are also activated by a telephone keypad and the machines leave rings of fire after time traveling. Both movies also expanded into widespread series with multiple sequels.
- This battle’s soundtrack would be called, “Back to the Excellent Future”, combining words in both series’ titles.
Made by PowerfulEevee
- The soundtrack’s cover would be a ring of fire circling around the middle of the cover, with the Delorean’s remote standing in the middle. On the remote, there are multiple stickers beholding Bill and Ted’s band title, “The Wyld Stallyns” There is also a broken guitar on the other sides of the ring.
