Battle Of The Most Creative Heroines![]
B
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oomstick: Wiz, you know what I love more than beer and a nice long nap?
Wiz: What Boomstick?
Boomstick: A nice strong powerful woman.
Wiz: Like your ex?
Boomstick: Shut up. You know what I mean.
Wiz: Like Momo Yaoyorozu, class 1-A vice president, and heroine in training at UA Academy.
Boomstick: And Batgirl, daughter to police chief, and technological brains to the Batman family.
Wiz: For this battle, we will be using Batgirl from the Pre-52 universe, not New 52.
Boomstick: Yeah, cause New 52 was confusing as crap. He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons armour and skills to find out who would win... A DEATH BATTLE!!
Batgirl swoops into DEATH BATTLE![]
Wiz: Commissioner James Gordon was the toughest cop in Gotham with an eye for Justice, and a family to protect.
Boomstick: In Jimmy's little place he calls home, his pride and joy was his daughter, Barbara.
Wiz: Barbara Eileen Gordon always wanted to live a life of adventure and to serve the public by becoming a police officer, like her dad.
Boomstick: So she applyed to police school, and became a cop, got shot up on her first day, and became the world's first robot police officer. Psych!!
Wiz: Yeah, she never got in. The police academy rejected her, and her father didn't want her risking her life like how he did.
Boomstick: Oh god, this isn't another "All women are superpowered, all men are gay and/or villians" thing is it?!
Wiz: Actually no. Barbara was rejected because Jim didn't want his daughter, his only family I should mention, getting hurt, or killed.
Boomstick: Oh. Great! He cares about her cause he's a good dad, unlike mine. That's good at least--
Wiz: She's appearently bisexual in New 52 though.
Injustice Gods Among Us - Batgirl Reveal Trailer-0
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Boomstick:... SON OF A--
Wiz: After being rejected by the academy, Barbara didn't give up. She kept trying to apply to the police academy, even the Justice Society of America, until Halloween that year.
Boomstick: What do you mean?
Wiz: Well, ever since childhood, Barbara was inspired by the Dark Knight himself, Batman to be a heroine, and made a halloween costume of the Caped Crusader.
Boomstick: Before she could show her new costume to her dad at a Wayne Manor party, some thugs led by (Laughing) Killer Moth wrecked the party?! Who came up with this? This is so stupid!
Wiz: Boomstick... Killer Moth eventually turns into a literal giant mutant moth.
Boomstick: Oh.
After fighting the criminals, Barbara donned her famous yellow and black costume and became The Batgirl.
Boomstick: Sooo... Just like that she's a member of Batman's team?
Wiz: Well, no actually. She earned her status and trust with Batman, along with other heroes, like Black Canary and Wildcat.
Boomstick: Before she met the big bad Bat, she was an expert in computer hacking, acrobatics (kind of.) and that was about it.
Wiz: Well, she was also able to sneak into the Justice Society of America's secret base in the middle of the night, before she was Batgirl!
Boomstick: Yeah, but how they reject her if they didn't see her?
Wiz: She could've sneaked in there without being seen, but she WANTED to be seen, to show her potential.
Boomstick: Yeah, look how well that did.
Wiz: She beat Killer Moth and Firefly who were in a HELICOPTER SWERVING AROUND LIKE MADMEN!!
Boomstick: ...That alone makes her the most hardcore heroine in the DC Universe!
Wiz: We haven't even gotten to her equipment yet!
Boomstick: What?
Wiz: Her equipment in her utility belt! She has almost every weapon in her arsenal the Batman does! Such as:
- A grapple hook
- Bat-claw (used for grabbing out of reach objects.)
- Mini explosives.
- Gas pellets.
- Police tracking device.
- Mini hacking computer.
Boomstick: She's mastered several martial arts, taken down the Joker multiple times, beaten Batwoman, survived inside an exploding church, and even survived a point blank gunshot wound to her stomach.
Wiz: Yeah, that's where Batgirl had ended as far as the Pre 52 universe.
Boomstick: Well, she way cooler and way prettier than the New 52 version.
Wiz: But they look the same. Are you talking about Batwoman?
Boomstick: She sucks worse then my ex.
BATGIRL: IF BATMAN WON'T HELP, THEN LET'S SEE WHAT BATGIRL CAN DO.
Yaoyorozu creates a new DEATH BATTLE![]
Boomstick: Hey Wiz, would you rather have any powers, or no powers at all?
Wiz: Boomstick we're cyborgs. We don't need powers.
Boomstick: Good cause most powers SUCK!!!!!! I mean, who would want stretchy eyeballs, a balloon head or a really long nose??
Wiz: Not all powers are terrible in the world of My Hero Academia. Some have amazing potential, like All Might's power, One for All. Or in this case, Momo Yaoyorozu has the amazing power of creating objects with her own skin.
Boomstick: She can make stuff, like Green Lantern without a RING?!
Wiz: Sort of. She can turn lipids in the food she eats into atoms needed to form the objects she uses, like bo staffs, shields, even a gigantic gun.
Boomstick: I think I found my next wife.
Wiz: Boomstick! She's 16!
Boomstick: Wait, what?! She looks like she's in her early to mid 20's!
Wiz: ... You're sick.
Boomstick: No, who ever created her is sick.
Wiz: Keep telling yourself that Wiz. Keep telling yourself.
Boomstick: While Wiz thinks I'm a pervert, let's go over stuff she can make.
Wiz: Yes, let's do that. She can create things up a couple of limits.
Final Exam Momo's Plan My Hero Academia-0
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Boomstick: This isn't one of those T-1000 limits right?
Wiz: No, thankfully, because she can create guns, and weapons with moving parts and chemicals unlike the T-1000.
Boomstick: But you said she has limits.
Wiz: Yes, those being that the more things she makes, the more lipids will go into that.
Boomstick: Okay!...What does that mean?
Wiz: The fat in her body can be remade into weapons. When she uses too much, it can be unhealthy and potentially dangerous and downright fatal. And she can only make weapons that she knows the atomic structure of the elements in said weapon.
Boomstick: So her power can kill her.
Wiz: Yes. It could've, if other elements didn't make up for her skills such as bukijutzu: The art of using any and all hand held weapons. I've been meaning to study it, as this teaches you how to use every hand held weapon, IN EXISTANCE.
Boomstick: Sign me up Wiz! I wanna try that stuff!
Wiz: Remember Might Guy?
Boomstick: Yeah! Oh wait. Right, Eight Gates of Chakira. Never mind Wiz. Never mind.
Wiz: She also has panic attacks when her confidence is low, but even that doesn't stop her. She will always fight to the end, no matter what.
Boomstick: Yeah, she is a pretty epic heroine. Also, her quirk burns her fat? No wonder why she looks like a damn supermodel. She's burnin' more calories by making crap. Not actual crap, figuritive crap!
Wiz: Come on Boomstick. That's not why she looks like that.
Boomstick: Can't convince me otherwise Wiz.
MOMO YAOYOROZU: WE'VE GOT TO START AT THE BOTTOM AND WORK UP! AND IF WE DON'T EARNESTLY CHEER EACH OTHER ON... WE'LL NEVER BECOME THE TOP HEROES!!
Pre-Battle[]
Wiz: All right, we've analyze both combatants and we've run all data through all possibilities.
Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!!!!!!!!!!
DEATH BATTLE[]
(Abandoned Warehouse at 12:20 A.M. Black Mask organizes his men for a weapons deal.)
BLACK MASK: Men, what don't Gotham have that I got? Control. With this shipment of new plasma guns, I got control by the boatloads. And when we're done with the GCPD and Batman, I can get people the protection that they want. For a price of course. So! Who wants a piece of Gotham City, WITH THE BLACK MASK?!
(Black Mask's men cheer in agreement while Batgirl watches them from above.)
Batgirl (Whispering): Bruce, are you seeing this?
Batman (Over comms):Yeah, this is going to be difficult. Good luck Batgirl.
(Batgirl pulls out batarang when...)
(KNOCK KNOCK!!)
BLACK MASK (To one of his soldiers): Check it out.
SOLDIER: WHO'S THERE?!
YAOYOROZU: PIZZA DELIVERY!!!
(Doors blast open revealing Yaoyorozu with a rocket launcher and bo-staff.)
BLACK MASK: What the--? WASTE THIS SKANK!
Batgirl: I don't think so Roman!!
(Batgirl and Yaoyorozu fight Black Mask's men, and then Yaoyorozu creates a tranq gas bomb and a mask for herself. Batgirl notices and grabs her breathing apperatis and puts it in her mouth.)
BLACK MASK: WHAT THE (COUGH) (COUGH) HELL? Ooooooohhhhhhhh.......
(Black mask falls over unconsious while the air clears enough to breath normally.)
Batgirl (removes apperatis from mouth): Who the heck are you supposed to be? You can't just go around dressed in a fancy costume and call yourself a hero.
Yaoyorozu: I could say the same thing about you.
Batgirl: I earned my hero status. You just dress like eye candy.
Yaoyorozu: You must be one of Black Mask's henchmen!
Batgirl: Seriously? If anything YOU must be one of his henchmen.
FIGHT!
(Yaoyorozu pulls out her bo-staff, then charges at Batgirl. Batgirl catches the bo-staff with her gauntlet blades.)
Y: You're good.
B: Just wait til I start trying!
(Batgirl cuts the bo-staff and kicks Yaoyorozu in shoulder. Heel of her boot goes through her shoulder, Yaoyorozu cries out in pain and stumbles back. Holding a cut part of the bo-staff, she starts using it as a sword. Yaoyorozu attacks managing to land a couple blows on Batgirl.)
Y: Just like they say:
(Stabs Batgirl in shoulder) Eye for an eye.
B: I... couldn't... (activates smoke pellets) agree... more! (Rips out the bo-staff out of her shoulder. Smoke shoots out everywhere.) AAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Y: Oh no! (Grabs her design book and looks for infered goggles. Batgirl watches from a distance, and pulls out her hacking computer. Yaoyorozu looks everywhere with the goggles only for them to not work. She makes a shield.)
Y: What the heck are you?
B (Laughing): I should ask you the same.
Y: What did you do to my goggles?!
B: I'm not gonna tell you, unless you tell me where you got that stuff from.
(Yaoyorozu makes a drone with a missile launcher. The drone finds Batgirl.)
B: Uh-oh.
(Missiles are launched and Yaoyorozu attacks Batgirl from behind, knocking her into some boxes. Batgirl goes for a punch, but cuts Momo's chest, between her sternum, and her throat. Her opponent makes a sword, and falls over, groaning.)
B: I think I got you right where I want you.
Y: What?!
B: Your body needed something to convert into the materials you needed. Without that substance in your body, you can barely move.
(Momo is close enough to snach the hacking computer and breaks it, then sends the drone to attack Batgirl. She then disappears and Momo grabs the infered goggles and looks around. She can't see Batgirl until she hears a sound: Her throat being cut, and a whisper.)
B: I only want to seen when I want to be.
(Yaoyorozu looks up, falls over, blood rushing from her throat.)
(Batgirl handcuffs Black Mask and all his men.)
K.O.!!!!
Post Battle[]
Boomstick: Woah... that was the most brutal death I've seen. And I've seen some real doosies. Like when Mama Boomstick held a hot dog competition... I was--
Wiz: The only survivor. Yes. But here, Momo almost overpowered Batgirl easily, if not for three factors:
- Stealth.
- Endurance.
- Equipment.
Boomstick: Oh god, the long hours on the toilet, it just kept comming out...
Wiz:... Anyway, Yaoyorozu has some amazing feats on her own, but most don't compare to most of Batgirl's feats, like the helicopter feat. Given the proper amount of prep time, Momo could have beaten her. But as Death Battle rules go, she is given no prep-time.
Boomstick: But what about Batgirl?
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Wiz: Given the fact she was trained BY BATMAN, she was trained in his martial arts, and detective skills. So she was on par Batman, the greatest detective ever! And she's taken on powerful beings probably stronger than Yaoyorozu.
Boomstick: Looks like Yaoyorozu couldn't keep Batgirl down for a Momo, till Batgirl gave her the final blow.
Wiz: The winner is Batgirl.
Next Time On Death Battle[]
"I'M GOIN' WITH YOU, I'M GOIN' FOR BLOOD."
"YES! I LOVE IT WHEN YOU'RE FIESTY!!"
WOLVERINE VS. YANG XIAO LONG
IF THIS BATTLE HAD A SCORE[]
Title: Gadgets Galore
Composer: Brendan Yates