Custom-Made Thumbnail by DBDoctor13.
Rey VS Ashi is a What-If? Death Battle by DBDoctor13. It sees Ashi [1] from Samurai Jack facing Rey [2] from the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy.
DESCRIPTION[]
Born from monsters, these two powerful offspring went on to help restore balance to their worlds. Now these two unlikely saviors clash in a duel of the titans. Will Ashi defeat Rey? Or will the Daughter of Aku meet her end at the hands of the Granddaughter of Palpatine?
INTRODUCTION[]
(Music: Wiz & Boomstick- Brandon Yates)
Boomstick: If there’s any life-lesson I can impart to our viewers; never have kids unless you’re sure you want to have them. Nine times out of ten, they turn out to be a real pain in the ass.
Wiz: Much like with anyone unfortunate to give birth to a baby made from Boomstick’s DNA, these two came from the worst upbringings and have inherited nearly unlimited power. Yet miraculously have gone on to save their respective worlds.
Boomstick: HEY!
Wiz: Ashi; the daughter of Aku and love of Samurai Jack.
Boomstick: And Rey; the granddaughter of Emperor Palpatine turned into The Last Jedi! He’s Wiz, and I’m Boomstick!
Wiz: And it’s our job to analyze their armor, weapons, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle!
ASHI[]
(Music: Daddy's Girl by Tyler Bates from Samurai Jack: The Complete Fifth Season Soundtrack)
Wiz: Fifty years into the dark future he was banished to, and the wandering samurai called ‘Jack’ had been lost. All time portals had been destroyed, Aku was still alive, and he had lost his magical blade.
Boomstick: But when all hope seemed lost, an assassin turned out to be the thing that brought him back from the brink of failure. Her name was Ashi.
Wiz: Ashi was born to a cult of women who worshiped Aku. When the Shapeshifting Master of Darkness finally answered their calls, he left a sliver of his essence for them to do with as they pleased. The leader of the cult drank the substance which impregnated her allowing her to give birth to Ashi and six more daughters.
Boomstick: Oh, man! How could she even stand after giving birth that many times?!
Wiz: Oh, and I suppose you’re an expert on childbirth?
Boomstick: No, but I can take a pretty educated guess that it’s harder for them to push something out than it is for me to push something in to them.
Wiz: Anyways… Ashi was then subjected to a lifetime of training for the next 19 years to prepare herself and her sisters for the day they would kill Samurai Jack. Her mother told Ashi and her sisters that the beauty of the world was Aku’s doing and that Jack threatened to undo it all. In addition, the daughters were forced to bathe in steaming coal, and get beaten down by what I assume to be one of Boomstick’s ex-wife.
Boomstick: Hey! It is her! Since when did my third ex-wife take up Sumo Wrestling?!
Wiz: Getting back on track, Ashi has learned a wide variety of tricks over the years. She’s a master at hand-to-hand combat and once took down an entire army and her own mother by herself. She is also adaptable in using any form of weapons but her main weapon was a Kusarigama.
Boomstick: Curse what gamma?
Wiz: A Kusarigama is a traditional Japanese weapon consisting of a sickle attached to a chain. Basically think of a scythe and a grappling hook combined.
Boomstick: That sounds AWESOME! I need to make one for my foot! Anyways, Ashi and her sisters eventually went after Jack after years of training. But even without his sword, Jack killed every one except for Ashi. Then the two got swallowed by a giant monster.
Wiz: But after escaping, Ashi began to see that the Samurai was innocent. She finally saw what Aku’s tyrannical rule had done to the world, and learned of the stories where the Samurai had saved others from the demon’s cruelty. She became one of his best allies and something more.
(Ashi and Jack are seen kissing.)
(Music: Shamisen Chikara by Pete Masitti from Shamisen Rock 2636)
Boomstick: Way to go, Jack! About time he found someone to love! Anyways, things seemed to be looking good. With her help, Jack was able to retrieve his sword and resume his mission to at least curb stomp Aku to the ground. But now he’d be going with a powerful ally.
Wiz: Ashi is strong enough to yank a gatling gun out of Jack’s hands, lift people twice as strong and heavier than her, slice her way through a building-sized machine and even punch a hole in stone using the bone of a goat’s horn.
Boomstick: She can dodge multiple point-blank arrows or machine-gun fire and move faster than Samurai Jack to the point where she’s a blur to him. We’ve already established that Jack can react and move about 70% the speed of light, so Ashi should be even faster than that!
Wiz: She survived electrocution, falling from a hundred feet, being hit hard enough to break a gravestone, and was once crushed by a building-sized robot with no injuries. Not to mention the punishment she took growing up proves that she has a high-pain tolerance.
Boomstick: But guess what? This ain’t even her final form.
Wiz: After discovering his daughter, Aku was able to bring out his essence within her. In this form, Ashi has access to all the same powers as Aku. She can transform into any three-dimensional or two-dimensional form she wants. She can even regenerate any part of her that is damaged even if it is by Jack’s own magical blade.
Boomstick: She can shoot eye-beams, stretch her limbs, and actually has immunity to touching Jack’s blade in the final episode unlike her own father!
Wiz: We’ll cover her final ability in a second as it ties in to her greatest feat and her greatest weakness. But suffice it to say that Ashi was one of the most powerful individuals Jack was lucky to know. She defeated the hive-creature known as Lazarus 92, killed her own mother, and even stood her own ground against her father after breaking free of his control once Jack confessed his love for her. But even those could not measure up to Ashi’s greatest power; the ability to create a time portal. Which she used to get Samurai Jack back to his proper time. But while Jack was able to finally complete his mission and destroy Aku before he could take over the world, this sadly erased Ashi from existence.
(ASHI [Weakly]: Jack…without Aku…I would have never existed. [Ashi fades away leaving only behind her bridal robes.] JACK [Tearfully]: No…Ashi…)
Boomstick (Sniffing): Goddamit, Genndy Tartakovsky… why’d you have to do that to us? Why’d you have to Back to the Future her out of existence?!
Wiz: I think it’s also important to note that while Ashi is powerful, without access to her father’s abilities she can be killed like her sisters were. However, it’s undeniable that without Ashi, Jack would’ve never found his way home. And while he lost the woman he loved, she left him with the most beautiful gift that she could leave behind; a future of peace and hope without her father for Jack to live in.
(ASHI: I’m going to stop you. [The orc army laughs at her.] ORC: So a little thing like you’s gonna stop this whole army, huh? ASHI: Yep. [The orc’s charge at her. The leader swings his sword down only for Ashi to side-step and then punch him in the face, knocking some teeth and blood out in the process.])
REY[]
(Music: Battle of Teth by Kevin Kiner from Star Wars: The Clone Wars Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)
Wiz: A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, Emperor Palpatine had been defeated.
Boomstick: NOT!!!!
Wiz: Turns out that Palpatine actually had a number of plans left as failsafe’s in the event of the Death Star II’s failure. One of those plans was to create clones of himself. However, one such clone found a way to escape and got married.
Boomstick: The clone and his wife had a daughter but one of the more successful Palpatine Clones wanted her for himself to train her in the ways of the Dark Side.
Wiz: The parents left their daughter on the harsh desert junk planet of Jakku where she would eventually grow up to become known simply as Rey.
(Music: The Scavenger by John Williams from Star Wars: The Force Awakens Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)
Boomstick: Rey spent her time doing what most orphaned kids in the Star Wars Universe do; explore the remains of awesome vehicles, sell remains, and live off the land. Ah, living the dream, Rey.
Wiz: One day, Rey met a droid named BB-8, who just so happened to have a map that supposedly led to the whereabouts of Luke Skywalker. She then joined up with a former Stormtrooper and escaped the desert planet. Although she felt her parents would return, Rey soon discovered her connection to the Force and eventually accepted that her parents would not come back. Thus, she began training in the ways of the Force. Despite never being properly trained, Rey found she could tap into various abilities with some concentration.
The two hear a knock at the door.
Boomstick (Curious): Oh, I wonder who that could be.
Boomstick walks off-screen and we hear a door opening. We then hear an angry mob chanting.
ANGRY MOB (O.S.): BURN THEM DOWN! BURN THEM DOWN! BURN THEM DOWN!
We hear the door locking and Boomstick walking back into frame.
Boomstick (Nonchalantly): We may be trapped.
Wiz: Rey is extremely strong with the force. She can use force-pull or force-push to bring objects closer or move them away from her. She can probe people’s minds or preform the famous mind-trick on them. She can use Force Sense, Battle Meditation, Force Visions, Battle Meditation, and even force-healing where she can heal others who have suffered any kind of wounds. However, this does drain her body and increase the risk of death.
(Music: The Falcon by John Williams from Star Wars: The Force Awakens Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)
Boomstick: Even without her powers and awesome-looking lightsaber, she still has a number of extraordinary skills under her belt. She self-taught her own style of lightsaber training while combining the knowledge of the first Jedi using books she took from the first Jedi temple. She also knows plenty of hand-to-hand combat, has remarkable aim with a blaster, knows plenty of alien languages, and is a proficient pilot and engineer. But she’s not only well-equipped with a lightsaber.
Wiz: Right, before using Luke Skywalker’s first lightsaber, Rey used a staff as her first weapon. Rey was remarkably gifted with it as she could take down two thugs ganging up on her by herself.
([Finn watches as Rey defeats her attackers. The former Stormtrooper tries to look casually as if he weren’t needed just a second ago.])
Boomstick: Well, I guess it’s no wonder that Rey became a legend in her own right. She’s climbed up a structure which she estimated to be equal to a hundred meters. Defeated Kylo Ren multiple times in battle, and even overpowered Luke Skywalker himself.
Wiz: Luke stated that he felt a similar measure of her power in Kylo Ren and feared her obsession would lead her down the path of darkness. But Rey proved her commitment to the light side of the force during her first and final confrontation with her grandfather. Rey not only managed to block her Grandfather’s Sith Lightning after her fired it, but with the aid of the Jedi who came before her, Rey succeeded in finally destroying her grandfather, and the Sith once and for all.
Boomstick: She…
There is a crash and the two turn, as the camera follows their vision. The angry mob has broken in but now has turned into a brawl between Raging Fans and Social Justice Warriors.
RAGING FAN #1: J.J. ABRAMS AND RAIN JOHNSON RUINED STAR WARS!!!
SJW #1: REY IS OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!!!
RAGING FAN #2: RELEASE THE TREVORROW CUT!!!
SJW #2: RITEMAN CAN EAT A BIG BAG OF DICKS IF HE THINKS WOMEN AND GIRLS AREN'T FANS WHO ARE WORTHY OF SEEING COOL STORIES THAT INCLUDE THEM ONCE IN A GODDAMN BLUE MOON! FLIP OVER A TABLE! BURN DOWN THE WORLD!!!
RAGING FAN #3: FAKE NEWS!!!!
SJW #3: I DON'T WANT TO WATCH A WELL-INTENTIONED BUT UNSTABLE MAN GET BULLIEED UNTIL HE TURNS INTO A MASS MURDERER!!!
Boomstick: Stop. (A bit louder) Stop. (Screams at the top of his lungs) STOOOOOOPPPPPPP!!!!!!
Everybody stops and looks back at Boomstick who is appearing very red in his face. Wiz can only look on shocked and concerned for his co-host. He slowly shuffles away from his companion.
Boomstick: I am so SICK of all this SJW/Raging Fan bullshit that has been going on since the end of 2015! Do any of you even hear how goddamn stupid everything you post online sounds?! I just want to enjoy movies and shows and then later kill characters from those shows online! Instead, all of you have to turn it into your own pride banner to try and feel validation of some kind. But you do it at the cost of hurting people without even realizing it. (Raises his hands) Well, fuck your validation. Fuck your groups. Fuck your beliefs! AND FUCK ALL OF YOU!!!!
Sith Lightning erupts from Boomstick’s hands as both groups are electrocuted. Boomstick’s face twists and contorts with rage and anger as he amps up the Sith Lightning.
Boomstick (Screaming): UNLIMITED POOOOWEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!
He finally stops as both groups are reduced to ashes. Boomstick takes a series of deep breaths as Wiz looks in horror.
Wiz: I sensed…a disturbance. As if millions of keyboard warriors on both sides of the spectrum suffered a major stroke. And then were silenced forever.
Boomstick: Right, moving on. Rey’s endured close-range explosions which have hurled her off her feet. She’s fast enough to dodge several blaster bolts, or appear as a blur to the human eye. She even survived being electrocuted!
Wiz: She was fast and strong enough to sweep a man off his feet with her staff and then knocked him out in one bow. She even knocked out two armed thugs by knocking them into each other. But Rey is not perfect. Despite her accomplishments, she did suffer from insecurities and fears that she could become like her grandfather and fall to the dark side. Also, she is still only human. Plus, though she defeated her grandfather, she herself died soon after he did. At least until Ben Solo transferred his remaining life force into her to allow Rey the chance to wash away the sins of the Palpatine Legacy. Leaving Ben to rise and ascend to a new plane of existence.
Boomstick: And that is what makes Rey an interesting character. The chance to wash away the sins of the past.
(PALPATINE [As Rey blocks his lightning using Leia’s lightsaber]: YOU ARE NOTHING!!! A SCAVENGER GIRL IS NO MATCH FOR THE POWER IN ME!!! I AM ALL THE SITH!!!! REY [Struggling] And I… [Anakin Skywalker’s lightsaber flies right into her other hand] …am all the Jedi!!! [Rey uses Leia and Anakin’s lightsabers to deflect the lightning back into Palpatine, vaporizing him into nothingness.])
DEATH BATTLE![]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all.
Boomstick: It’s time for a DEATH BATTTTLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
PRE-FIGHT[]
Ashi is seen in her leaf-outfit walking through a jungle.
ASHI: I must find the Samurai. Oh god, if he dies because of what I said…
As she passes by some bushes, Rey suddenly pokes her head out from behind there.
(Music: Daughters of Darkness- Brandon Yates)
REY [V.O.]: What’s this? I sense a darkness in that woman. Something even more powerful than Kylo Ren.
Rey takes her staff and lunges at Ashi. The daughter of Aku hears her and grabs a nearby branch and blocks the attack with it.
FIGHT![]
ASHI (Struggling): Who the hell are you?! Another bounty hunter to kill the Samurai?!
Rey headbutts Ashi, pushing her back and then whacks her in the face with the staff. Ashi falls to the ground as Rey points her staff at Ashi’s neck.
REY: You are going to tell me who your master is, and then you are going to bring me to him!
ASHI: I don’t have a master! And I don’t have time for this!
Ashi kicks Rey’s staff out of her hands and then backflips into a nearby river. Rey takes out a blaster and starts shooting at the river. Ashi takes a deep breath and dives, dodging the blasts as best she can. However, Rey concentrates and breaths deeply connecting to the Force and senses Ashi. Rey fires a perfect shot, hitting Ashi in the abdomen. Ashi groans in pain as she begins bleeding. The bleeding rises to the surface and creates a trail which Rey follows. However, Ashi manages to see that there is a waterfall just ahead and she gives herself one last push, diving off the waterfall. She lands bellow and quickly finds some underwater seaweed of-sorts. Ashi ties it around the wound and looks up to see a shadow approaching the ground. She manages to dodge out of the way before a bright stick of light stabs the ground where she was a second ago.
On the surface, we see that Rey has drawn her lightsaber seen at the end of Rise of Skywalker. We also see the bottom of the waterfall resembles a battlefield of some kind. Fallen mechanical objects from ships and robots alike line the area of where a great battle must have taken place decades ago.
Rey closes her eyes concentrating again. Ashi holds her head in pain and Rey suddenly finds herself in the temple of the Daughters of Aku. Curious, she steps forward seeing the High Priestess with a naked young Ashi overlooking a pit full of hot coal at the bottom.
HIGH PRIESTESS: Aku, our lord and master, is one with the darkness. He was born from it. It fills him with infinite power. (She puts a hand on the young scared Ashi’s shoulder) We too much become one with it.
Rey watches as Ashi’s robes are removed, leaving the young daughter of Aku to cover her now-naked body.
HIGH PRIESTESS: We are forever grateful. And ever in your service.
Rey gasps as the High Priestess shoves Ashi down the pit, as she falls into the hot coals. The young Ashi claws out of the coals, her entire body covered in black ashes, resulting in her screaming at the top of her lungs. Rey suddenly cries out in pain. We cut back to the real world where Ashi has grabbed a piece of metal and stabbed Rey through her leg with it. Rey falls to a knee and swipes her lightsaber forcing Ashi to jump up. Rey does the same as well, swinging her lightsaber. Ashi blocks with a metal rod, but Rey cuts through it. Ashi gasps but throws the two rods into the air. She then roundhouse kicks both pieces. Rey cuts through one, but the other penetrates her shoulder. The Last Jedi screams as she lands and removes the piece from her shoulder and then the one from her leg.
REY: What kind of Sith are you?
ASHI: I don’t know what a Sith is, but you couldn’t begin to imagine the pain I’ve gone through. I’m on a mission to find someone important to me, and I’m not going to be stopped. Especially not by you.
Rey uses her Force-Push to slam Ashi into a nearby wall. The result leaves a big impact in there. Ashi is shown to have a broken nose. Rey force-slams her a couple more times before bringing Ashi out. She stops her when Ashi is only a few inches away from her.
REY: Whatever you are, there is a darkness in you. Something that has never been seen by myself or any other Jedi as far as I can tell. I cannot let you continue onwards.
Rey swings her lightsaber at Ashi’s neck. Seconds before impact, Ashi’s eyes open but they are now somehow completely white. A gleam of light is seen, but then we get a tight-shot on Rey’s face as she looks surprised. We zoom out to reveal a black substance is covering Ashi’s neck, which has somehow blocked the lightsaber strike. The substance overtakes her whole body as Ashi transforms into her Daughter of Aku Mode.
REY: What-?!
Ashi swats Rey into a nearby wall. Rey groans and tries to sense Ashi. However, all she gets are images of Aku laughing at her. Ashi turns two-dimensionsal and crawls like a shadow until she is underneath Rey before popping up with a pincer-like arm and stabbing Rey in the chest. Rey cuts off the tendril but it oozes back into Ashi. Rey concentrates hard.
REY: Please… please be with me…
Rey breathes slowly and concentrates hard. Once ready, her eyes open as she gives a determined look. Ashi returns to her three-dimensional state turning her left arm into a flaming sword construct. Rey lunges forward at Ashi who lunges forward as well. The camera pans out as we see a silhouette of the two passing each other, though it is impossible to tell who got who. We go back to a close shot of Ashi who falls to the ground and reverts to normal. However, Rey’s upper half suddenly slides off as her body has been cut-in-half.
Ashi awakens now back in human form as she looks around confused.
ASHI: What happened?
She notices the dead Rey.
ASHI: What could’ve done this? Who was that woman? I guess it doesn’t matter. I have to find the Samurai.
Ashi walks off, managing to retrieve some more leaves for her clothes to replace the ones that got damaged. Ashi walks away as Rey's dead body remains in the foreground.
The screen then cuts to the end title card of the Samurai Jack cartoon complete with a cover of part of the iconic theme song.
K.O.[]
ANNOUNCER: K.O.!
RESULTS[]
Boomstick: Goddamn!
Wiz: Sorry, Star Wars fans. I know you wanted Rey to win, but Ashi took a lot of advantages over her. Keep in mind that Ashi had been training since birth while Rey had to wait until adulthood to train.
Boomstick: Their blur-speed feats were pretty similar. But Ashi won out due to the fact that she could scale to Jack’s speed at about 70% the speed of light! And while Rey surviving explosions was pretty cool, don’t forget the building-sized monster smackdown Ashi lived through!
Wiz: Unfortunately, Rey couldn’t really do much to hurt Ashi once she went into full-on Aku Mode. Even if she did find Jack’s sword, Ashi could regenerate her body pretty quickly. Plus, while Rey lived through the giant explosion that finally killed Palpatine, she only did so after Ben Solo finally gave his life to save hers. Rey was a powerful Force-User, but Ashi’s superior training, speed, and powers put her above the Last Jedi.
Boomstick: Looks like Ashi REY-gned this fight.
Wiz: Ugh!
Boomstick: What’s wrong, Wiz. Do you want me to read you some Hi-AKU’s?!
Wiz: The winner is Ashi.
TRIVIA[]
The similarities between Ashi and Rey is that both characters are related by blood to the worst villains of their respective worlds (Ashi being the biological daughter of Aku and Rey being the Granddaughter of Palpatine). They are also both a topic of controversy from their respective fandoms, though Ashi seems to have a better-built fanbase. Another thing they share is that Genndy Tartakovsky has written for both franchises as he created Samurai Jack and wrote for the original 2D Animated Clone Wars episodes. Ironically, Genndy stopped writing Samurai Jack to work on the Clone Wars which resulted in the long gape between Season 4 and Season 5 of Samurai Jack.
In the analysis of Rey, a fight breaks out between groups of Social Justice Warriors and Angry Fans. The quotes the groups give are based on actual comments spoken by real Social Justice Warriors and Angry Fans respectively. This was done as a response to a backlash on Rosario Dawson being cast in Season 2 of The Mandalorian by Social Justice Warriors over an alleged comment that she and her husband gave. At the time of the Fanon Battle's posting, the quote Dawson was accused of saying has not been confirmed to be true or not. The other decision to include this segment stemmed from an incident where DBDoctor13 saw angry fans who poked fun at seeing certain Universal and Disney Theme Parks close due to concerns over the Corona Virus Outbreak. DBDoctor13 included this as a response to Angry Fans and Social Justice Warriors who he felt should have been concerned about the current Corona Virus outbreak, trying to help their fellow men and women instead of using the time to argue over insignificant things that have not been proven yet, or did not matter in the long-run during a time of world-wide crisis.
This fight would ideally be a 2D Hand-Drawn animated fight done in the style of Samurai Jack and the 2D Star Wars: Clone Wars animated series.
Boomstick exhibits Sith Powers when he blasts both the Angry Fans and Social Justice Warriors while shouting Palpatine's line of "UNLIMITED POWER" from Episode III: Revenge of the Sith.
This fight presumably takes place during the events of Samurai Jack Season 5. Specifically during the events of Episdoe XCVII as Ashi is searching for Jack and has just found her leaf outfit.
The Song Daughters of Darkness refers to the dark heritage that Rey and Ashi have. It would ideally be a metal song with an emphasis on guitars. Hints of the Star Wars Theme, Rey's Theme, and Ashi's theme would be heard throughout the battle. At the end is a short cover of the classic Samurai Jack theme song.