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Aragorn VS Jon Snow
Aragornjon.jpg
Season 1, Episode 8
Vital statistics
Air date September 18, 2015
Written by Darth_Mallen
Directed by Darth_Mallen
Episode guide
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Mallen92506 Originals Battle Royale Joel Miller VS Robert Neville

Aragorn VS Jon Snow is the 8th episode of Darth_Mallen's Death Battle. It features Aragorn from JRR Tolkien's Lord of the Rings trilogy and Jon Snow from George RR Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire.

Description

Longclaw vs Anduril! Two great leaders fight for superiority!

Interlude

Wiz: Mankind has always looked up to its leaders, and today we pit two of fantasy's most most known leaders against each other.

Boomstick: Aragorn, King of the Free Men of Middle Earth.

Wiz: And Jon Snow, Lord Commander of the Night's Watch.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.

Aragorn

Wiz: Aragorn, the second Elessar was the 16th Cheiftain of the Dunedain Rangers, 26th King of Arnor, 35th King of Gondor and 1st King of the Reunited Kingdom.

Boomstick: Damn that's a lot of titles! But his rise to leadership wasn't a smooth one.

Wiz: He was born to the Dunedain of the North but at the age of two, his father, Arathorn was killed by a pack of orcs and ended up in the care of Elrond of Rivendell. His adoptive father revealed to him that he was the heir to the long vacant throne of Gondor, however he chose a self imposed exile knowing his blood is responsible for the fall of the kingdom in the first place.

Boomstick: And also to get himself so tail in the form of Elrond's daughter Arwen. He also travelled the land of Middle Earth fighting evil wherever he could. And given his lineage he had plenty of time to do it. Because of his Numenorian blood he aged slower than most men, meaning at the time of the War of the Ring, he was 86 years old and still young!

Wiz: He met and befriended the wizard Gandalf who tasked him with protecting the borders of the Shire, taking on the mysterious name amongst the locals as Strider. It was during that time where four Hobbits entered the town of Bree with a magic ring where his destiny would be revealed.

Aragorn: You can no longer wait for wizard, Frodo. They're coming.

Wiz: Aragorn would join the Hobbits on their journey along with an elf, a dwarf, a wizard and Sean Bean to take the Ring to Mordor and destroy it.

Boomstick: For the journey, Aragorn was given Anduril, reforged from the shards of Narsil. The Flame of the West was made by the Galadrim with a special enchantment which made it unbreakable and unstainable. He also carries an elvish dagger and archery gear for long ranged kills.

Wiz: After the breaking of the Fellowship, he, Legolas and Gimli set off along the plains of Rohan to hunt Uruk-Hai. These creatures were stronger and faster than your standard orcs and could move in daylight. Aragorn would defeat many of these creatures during the battle of Helms Deep...

Boomstick: And would literally throw himself head first into whole armies of them! He's so impulsive he often does stupid stuff like that with no plans to get out. Usually his allies have to bail him out.

Wiz: Aragorn is a great leader, inspiring loyalty wherever he went, even beyond the grave.

Boomstick: He traveled to the Door Under The Mountain and convinced an army of the undead to fight for him at the battle of Pellenor Fields. And when their king decided not to play that game, his sword said no to physics and blocked a swing from a spectral blade!

Wiz: But even thats not the extent of his insane feats. At Weathertop when the Hobbits caught the attention of five Ringwraiths...

Boomstick: Who are undead, centuries old Kings of Men!

Wiz: And he fought them off single handed with nothing but a torch and a sword. He wasn't even using Anduril at that point.

Boomstick: But even that's not it! At the final battle at the Black Gate when he and his troops were insanely outnumbered, Aragorn was the first to charge at the orcs, slicing at them left and right and even fought an armored troll with a giant sword!

Wiz: And at one point, he even survived a fall off of a large cliff, into a rocky river.

Orc: He took a little tumble off the cliff!

Wiz: With all those insane feats it's no wonder he was crowned the rightful King of Gondor. He will always be there to protect the people and his country.

Boomstick: And yet he couldn't save Sean Bean.

Wiz: No-one can.

Aragorn: Leave all that can be spared behind. We travel light. Let's hunt some orc.

Jon Snow

Wiz: Born the illegitimate son of Eddard Stark, Lord of Winterfell, and a tavern whore called Wylla, Jon Snow was brought into Winterfell as an outsider, initially loathed by Ned's wife.

Boomstick: One serious illness later and he was part of the family, earning the respect of his half brothers and sisters though Momma Catlyn never showed it outright.

Wiz: Of all the Stark children Jon, despite being only half a family member, was more alike to Ned than any of the others, with a high sense of honor particularly since he had to fight hard to maintain a position of respect and love within his family. However, he eventually chose to join his Uncle Benjin as a member of the Night's Watch at the Great Wall, which separates the Seven Kingdoms from the wildlings in the North as well as other, more dangerous threats.

Boomstick: Like an endless immortal army of ice zombies! At the Wall he kicked everyone's ass in combat training, humiliating everyone with his superior sword skills. But the Lord Commander of the Watch was pissed that this noble bastard was humiliating him and his men, so he was named his lowly steward, serving his food and cleaning his shit.

Wiz: Though among some of his peers he earned respect and friendship, particularly with the Lord Commander after saving his life from a wight. As a thank you he gifted Snow with his family's sword.

Boomstick: Longclaw is a Valyrian steel sword with a direwolf's-head pomel. It was forged in dragonfire and is almost totally indestructible. Even the weapons of White Walker commanders, which shatter ordinary swords with ease, are able to deflect the deadly blows and kill the undead monsters with a single strike.

Wiz: Jon has mastered sword combat by learning higher class techniques and the more savage skills of the wildlings, learning directly from them as part of an intelligence mission for the Watch. His initiative and leadership skills successfully defended Castle Black from a massive wildling invasion, which earned him the position of Lord Commander of the Night's Watch and the respect of contender for the Seven Kingdoms Throne, Stannis Baratheon. His leadership didn't run well with everyone though, especially after rescuing wildlings from the White Walker army.

Boomstick: Which leads to Snow's biggest weakness: his stupidity and sense of honor.

Ygritte: You know nothing, Jon Snow.

Boomstick: He's always set on doing the right thing, even if he doesn't think it will affect him in the long term. Eventually his plan totally backfired and his enemies in the Watch had him killed.

Wiz: Well, we don't know he's dead, there's a lot of unanswered questions.

Boomstick: Well, he's bleeding out on the floor, he's clearly dead.

Wiz: But there's a rumor that he isn't even Ned's son!

Boomstick: Where'd he come from then?

Wiz: Well if the rumor's correct it means he is actually the rightful heir of...

Shotgun cocks

Boomstick: Stop talking, Wiz. You might not like what you find.

Jon Snow: My father told me big men fall just as quick as little ones, if you put a sword through their hearts.

DEATH BATTLE!

A great battle is taking place. Aragorn is slicing orcs left and right, which Jon Snow is cutting up walkers. Eventually Aragorn's and Jon's swords clash. They both back up and stare down.

FIGHT!

The two clash their swords. Aragorn gains the upper hand and kicks Snow away. Jon regroups and catches Aragorn's arm with a sword swing. He knocks Andruil from his grasp and Aragorn is quick to unsheathe his elvish dagger. He blocks blows an catches Jon with a sharp punch to the face. He rolls away and retrieves his sword. Snow picks up the shield of a fallen soldier and continues his offence, the two traded blows until Aragorn knocks the shield away. They both clash and come face-to-face till Aragorn headbutts Snow in the nose, staggering him. Aragorn took advantage, dealing heavy blows, eventually disarming Snow and with massive force, impales Snow in the stomach and out through the shoulder. Snow falls to the floor dead.

K.O.

Conclusion

Boomstick: Told ya, he's definitely dead.

Wiz: Both Aragorn and Jon Snow are great swordsmen, both on par with each other, but Aragorn's tenacity and decades of experience won this fight.

Boomstick: Even the feats Snow achieved in his life are totally overshadowed by Gondor's King. Both fought and defeated skilled undead warriors, but Aragorn was able to fight off five of them singlehanded, while Jon Snow struggled to kill one.

Wiz: And while Valyrian Steel is one of the strongest metals in the Game of Thrones universe, Andruil is protected by a special elvish enchantment which makes breaking the sword impossible.

Boomstick: Everyone loves a great sword fight, an Aragorn is just a cut above the rest.

Wiz: The winner is Aragorn.

Next Time on Death Battle

A radio crackles to life and searches through channels.

My name is Robert Neville. I'm a survivor living in New York City. If you are out there, please....you are not alone.

Trivia

  • The connection between Aragorn and Jon Snow is they are both strong and respected leaders of men, both of whom carry now iconic swords.
    • With the new information since this episode was written, both men are now the rightful Kings of their respected worlds.
  • This episode was brought forward after Undertaker VS Sting was cancelled due to unknown reasons. Joel Miller VS Robert Neville was the official replacement for the episode.
  • This is the first battle to feature a character from Lord of the Rings taking on a character from Game of Thrones. The next being Sauron VS Daenerys Targaryen.
  • This episode was written before season 6 of the Game of Thrones television show, which drastically altered Jon Snow's backstory and confirmed the infamous "R+L=J" theory, in which Jon is the son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark, and not the result of a one night affair between Eddard Stark and the tavern whore Wylla, who now may or may not exist.
  • This is the second battle in which the preview for the next fight is not clear, which either no combatant's clearly recognised or one fighter revealed while the opponant is kept a mystery. The first being Captain Planet VS Bibleman for Mallen92506 Originals Battle Royale, and the next being Revan VS Dragonborn for Johnny English VS Maxwell Smart.
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