Duck Dodgers VS Paperinik

Duck Dodgers VS Paperinik is a What-If episode of Death Battle, pitting Duck Dodgers from Duck Dodgers in the 24½th Century against Paperinik from PKNA.

Description
Warner Bros vs Disney! Defender of the Universe vs Alien Slayer! Which badass duck is the best?

Interlude
(cues Invader)

Wiz: Daffy and Donald. Two goofy, iconic cartoon anti-heroes that we all know.

Boomstick: If you really thought you knew everything about them, then you sure as hell are wrong!

Wiz: In fact, under their alternate identities, both fight aliens and defend our planet from them.

Boomstick: We're talking about Duck Dodgers, the duck in the 24½th Century.

Wiz: And Paperinik, the Diabolical Avenger.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analize their weapons, armors and skills to find out who would win in a DEATH BATTLE.

Paperinik
Wiz: If you live in Italy, you are going to read an analysis about one of the most well known and loved superheroes out there, probably as popular as Batman and Spiderman.

Boomstick: If you don't live in Italy, then prepare yourself for the darkest and most badass shit that Disney ever made!

Wiz: Paperinik first appears in 1969. In his first story, Donald receives a letter thanks to whom he wins a mansion called Villa Rosa.

Boomstick: And you all say he's unlucky!

Wiz: Here he finds the costume and the diary of Fantomius, a deceased masked avenger with the same morals as Robin Hood's.

'''Boomstick: Donald decides to take the costume, to create the identity of Paperinik, and for what? Defeat criminals and do the classic hero stuff? NO WAY! Avenge in illegal ways the shit that Scrooge McDuck and Gladstone did to him!'''

Wiz: Hovewer, Paperinik, also called PK, soon changes his mind and decides to defend DuckBurg from criminals and thieves...

Boomstick: Oh...

Wiz: But only at one condition: he did that mainly to scare them; just his shadow was necessary to freak criminals out.

'''Boomstick: Take an angry and goofy duck, add Batman, and BAM! Paperinik!'''

Wiz: Paperinik became the most powerful hero in Duckburg: many others tried to take his place, like Daisy, with her identity as the feminist Paperinika, who failed miserably.

Boomstick: Copycats...

Wiz: But one day, a famous actor was attacked by aliens, and Paperinik's equipment, that was made by Gyro Gearloose, was useless against them.

Boomstick: Meanwhile, Donald found a job in a new skyscraper with 150 floors, bought by his uncle Scrooge.

Wiz: Here, he discovered a secret floor, that contained an A.I. called U.N.O., which basically means "O.N.E." in italian.

'''Boomstick: It was built by a scientist called Everett Ducklair. This guy also created a second A.I., D.U.E., and I think you already understood what it means.'''

Wiz: U.N.O. helped Donald/Paperinik by giving to him various weapons to fight the aliens, called Evronians.

'''Boomstick: U.N.O. also helped him by controlling the various vehicles used by Paperinik in his missions, as he can hack and enter into every electronical device. Damn.'''

Wiz: In his fights against the Evronians and Time Pirate Paperinik met Xadhoom, an immortal, psychologically mutant who can manipulate energy, and absorb the power of thermonuclear reactors.

Boomstick: HOLY COW!

Wiz: Her name was originally Xado, and she was a scientist, who was studying the energy of the sun.

Boomstick: And when she returned to her planet, she found out that the Evronians killed her friends, and since she was one of the scientists that allowed them to enter on her planet, she started a killing spree to obliterate the Evronian race!

Wiz: Paperinik had an hard time controlling her aggressivity, and their relationship spaces from intense love moments to fights for Paperinik's very life, as Xadhoom often loses her control.

Boomstick: Screw that feminist of Paperinika!

Wiz: Paperinik had various enemies in his journey: the most dangerous were Everett Ducklair, who tried many times to turn U.N.O. off...

Boomstick: D.U.E., for the main reason...

Wiz: And the Raider, a time pirate, who is said by the writers to be, according to this list, a mid-tier character. Paperinik fought and won against him many times, although they sometimes allied to defeat strongest enemies.

Boomstick: But this badass version of Donald also joined two groups of superheroes: the higly debatable Superhero Club, which is FORTUNATELY NON-CANON!

Wiz: And the Ultraheroes, the strongest heroes in the Disney universe.

'''Boomstick: Including a badass duck, an owerpowered dog and some idiots! By the way, for this battle, we consider Paperinik's arsenal from both the first stories and the PKNA Saga, that means every weapon this guy ever had!'''

Wiz: Except for the weapons from the spin-off Pikappa. We aren't going to talk about that.

Boomstick: LUCKILY.

Wiz: By the way, Gyro Gearloose was the only one who knew Paperinik's true identity. Plus, he built various weapons for his friend.

'''Boomstick: Like a pair of boots with springs! Or a revolving pull-out punch! ... Original!'''

Wiz: He also has various guns. But his favourite weapons are by far the Car-Cans, candies t...

Boomstick: CANDIES!?

Wiz: When somebody eats them, they will lose their most recent memories. He uses them on whoever discovers his true identity; Gyro eats a couple of them after every mission.

Boomstick: OH!

Wiz: We aren't done. There's also the Crippling Gun: the victim isn't able to move properly like he wanted for a couple of hours, and a robot clone.

Boomstick: But the real badassery starts with PKNA!

Wiz: U.N.O. gave to Paperinik the Extransformer, a shield made of a mutagenic metal, that can turn into everything the Diabolical Avenger wants, and more. It can shoot like a normal blaster, and Paperinik also can throw a part of it like a boomerang. This part will often automatically extract accessories like a blade to finish the job faster.

'''Boomstick: And those are the weakest attacks of the Extransformer! It has a Bradionic Stun Gun, that cancels the subjective time of PK's foe. Basically, it's a one-hit K.O. weapon: the foe won't be able to move forever!'''

Wiz: The Holographic Psychocollector, that scans his foe's mind and turns his worse nightmare into reality, the Commutator Gravitational Ray, that can increase or decrease an enemy's weight. That's Paperinik's favourite function.

Boomstick: The 87bis, a Teleporter that NEVER works!

Wiz: The Extransformer can also fly at the speed of a race car, and is stoked by crystals that could keep it working for more than 200 years. Paperinik also has a device that can create holograms to confuse the others.

'''Boomstick: He also has a secondary gun, called PK Blaster. And no, that's not one of Ness's moves for Smash Bros. But the most incredible weapon he uses, is an Esoskeleton found in the Ducklair Tower, which he used to fight the mutated Evronian called Trauma!'''

Wiz: Hovewer, Paperinik is just a duck, and although he is stronger than the average duck and is experienced... Again, he's just a duck.

'''Boomstick: A badass one. And it was revealed that his worst nightmare is that, one day, Everett will be able to take U.N.O. on his side.'''