Cartoon Network Hero Battle Royale

Description
''Adventure Time vs Regular Show vs The Amazing World of Gumball vs Steven Universe!!!! The 4 Modern Cartoon Network protagonists fight it out in a battle of good and justice!!! AND BLOODY, PAINFUL DEATH!!!''

Interlude
Wiz: Cartoon Network has spawned several great cartoons over the years.

Boomstick: I remember when Little Boomstick woke up early on Saturday mornings just to watch all the hot Johnny Bravo babes.

Wiz: Uh....yeah. But now, a new generation of cartoons is upon us, and we will be seeing which of their heroes is the best.

Boomstick: Steven Universe, the Quartz Kid.

Wiz: Mordecai, the Blue Jay Buffoon.

Boomstick: Finn Mertins, the Candy Kingdom's Knight.

Wiz: And Gumball Watterson, the Colorful Kitty.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to see who would win a Death Battle.

Steven Universe
Wiz: A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.....

Boomstick: Hold on, I thought we were talking about some chubby little beach kid?

Wiz: We ARE. As I was saying, far, far away, there was a planet known as the Gem Homeworld.

'''Boomstick: One day, they decided to invade our world, suck out all our natural resources to create new gems, then they would rule the Earth! You know, weekend stuff.'''

Wiz: However, 4 gems were completely against this.

Boomstick: They were Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl and Stev-

Wiz: No, not even that close.

Boomstick: Huh?

Wiz: They were Rose Quartz, Pearl, Ruby and Sapphire.

'''Boomstick: Who the hell are they? *Watches all of Season 1* It was so beautiful! Also, they are a giant woman, a snarky bitch and two lesbians.'''

Wiz: Basically, yeah. They were joined by a gem who was created on earth, Amethyst and some other rebel gems.

'''Boomstick: This is where it gets dark. Yay!'''

Wiz: Many gems were killed in battle, and not just "poofed" to their original forms, their gems were crushed to pieces!

'''Boomstick: But eventually the rebels won! And the remaining guys were Rose, Amethyst, Pearl and Garnet. Wait, WHO THE HELL IS GARNET!?!'''

Wiz: Ruby and Sapphire, fused to become Garnet, who they stay as almost ALWAYS.

'''Boomstick: Even when she was a kid! But anyhow, Rose Quartz soon meant a human named Greg Universe, and they hooked up!'''

Wiz: Rose soon gave birth to a baby boy, who was half gem half human, but died shortly after, as she died holding her newborn before dying.

Boomstick: *Sobs* She was so BIG!

Wiz: Why? Gems can't hold their physical form to give birth.

Boomstick: But her child grew up to be really damn talented!

Wiz: His name? Steven Quartz Universe.

'''Boomstick: Steven is 11 years old, a great musician and has his mother's gem. In his belly button. Hey, maybe the reason he's so fat is because all his power is stored in his stomach?'''

Wiz: Highly unlikely.

Mordecai
Wiz: Mordecai was born in a small town, and became best friends with a racoon named Rigby.

'''Boomstick: They grew up together and flunked out of colleage! Cause who needs a degree!?!'''

Wiz: They two became workers at the park, which is the base of the famous kids show, Regular Show.

'''Boomstick: Yeah, the name DEFINATELY fools you. Cause with the stuff this guy can do, it's anything but.'''

Wiz: Mordecai has gone on tons of adventures. Mordecai was taught in the ancient art of Death Kwon Do.

'''Boomstick: Lame name aside, this is a deadly martial art that can kill a person with a single punch. That's really it.'''

Wiz: Using the holy weapons, the Fists of Justice, which somehow is like playing a video game, allows him to damage incredibly powerful beings.

'''Boomstick: Though sometimes Mordecai forgets how to use the damn things. '''

Wiz: Mordecai is also pretty physically strong, able to bash down doors, and also being able to tackle the Death Bear.

'''Boomstick: Also, Mordecai's greatest ability is his amazing ability to go hours in a Staring Contest. That is awesome.'''

Wiz: Still, Mordecai is somewhat of a moron, and has little combat experience without the help of his friends.

Boomstick: But with his cartoon abilities, Mordecai could take this!

Mordecai: I'LL KILL YOU!!!!

Finn Mertins
Wiz: Finn was born on a banana boat, on the sea.

Boomstick: Even though a crap load of creatures tried killing Finn, him, his dad and maybe his mom were fine.

Wiz: That was until he was abandoned in the woods by his unresponsible father, Martin.

Boomstick: Dick.

Wiz: Finn was later found by two canine adventurers, now married and with 2 kids, Joshua and Margreat Dog.

Boomstick: They trained Finn in the ways of a adventurer and knight, teaching him to be loyal, kind, brave, strong fast and teach him how to wield TONS of swords!!!

Wiz: Basically, he's Cartoon Network Captain America.

Boomstick: And with awesome hair.

Wiz: Finn and Jake became the protectors of the Land of Ooo, protecting it's ruler, Princess Bubblegum with their lives.

Boomstick: And Finn didn't have any magic abilities like his bro, so he needed some cool weapons to do so.

Wiz: And he has a variety of them.

'''Boomstick: Finn's first sword, yet weakest, is Scarlet, the Golden Sword. It is like all swords, sharp and awesome.'''

Wiz: However, Finn lost it in an explosion once, so lets hope he's more careful this time.

Boomstick: When Finn became Sweet 13, he found the deadly Root Sword, a pinkish metalic blade with a root like hold.

Wiz: One of his most powerful swords, the Demon Blood Sword, made from the blood of a demon named Kee-Oth.

'''Boomstick: It can light on fire, and is extremely sharp, sharper then any other. It can presumbaly shoot out fireballs too.'''

Wiz: He did have the powerful grass sword, but.....

Shows Finn's arm being ripped off

Boomstick: And finally, his most powerful sword....THE FINN SWORD.

Wiz: The Finn Sword increases Finn's strength, speed, durability, ect, and has a mini Finn who gives Finn encourgement in fights.

'''Boomstick: Finn was able to take down an army of gigantic worms with it, and with ease, too. Finn's Finn's sword is awesome!!!'''

Wiz: Finn was taught by Bufo, a frog wizard, in the ways of magic.

'''Boomstick: God, I hate that guy. Anyway, Finn had alot of spells.'''

Wiz: Beauteous Wings gives Finn swan like wings, and Vorpal Hand transforms the user's hand into a sword.

Boomstick: Tiger Claw transforms the user's hand into a tiger paw with sharp, powerful claws.

Wiz: Sleep puts the target into a sleep, and awaken does excactly what you think it would do.

Boomstick: Reflect blocks weaker attacks, and the last Wizard Power, the greatest Wizard Power, the Ultimate Wizard Hand allows the user to lift up nearly anything and break and destroy almost everything.

Wiz: However, Finn never uses these powers after the episode they appeared in, but that may be because Finn perfers his own fighting style.

Boomstick: He also knows Ice Ninja Magic, which allows him to create ninja weapons out of ice.

Wiz: Finn, though may not look like it, is a great sorcerror.

Finn destoys the asteroid with the Ultimate Wizard Hand

Wiz: Still, Finn is not without his weaknesses.

'''Boomstick: Finn is pretty stupid, he never went to school or anything. He doesn't even know 2+2! Ha! Everybody knows its 5!'''

Wiz: Uh....Sure. Finn is also very reliant on Jake sometimes, also he normally does have a partner with him.

Boomstick: But Finn also has done shit that nobody could ever THINK of accomplishing!

Wiz: Finn can create fire with his barehands, and survived his head being dipped in lava.

'''Boomstick: He also constantly defeats creatures that were created to fight! That's manly!'''

Wiz: Finn truly is the Land of Ooo's greatest fighter.

Finn: MATHMATICAL!

Gumball Watterson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bO-RRa6Gh4Y

Wiz: Gumball is a blue cat/rabbit hybrid.

Boomstick: Born into the Wattersons, one of the many Simpson family ripoffs.

Wiz: Gumball was born with cartoon durability, unlike other famed cartoon character, Spongebob, who is a sponge, and can "soak in" injuries.

'''Boomstick: Gumball constantly get's beaten up by a T-REX. Named Tina.'''

Wiz: Gumball's main weapon is-

'''Boomstick: Extendable claws! Like Wolverine!'''

Wiz: Gumball's claws are very sharp, and can shred up things very quickly.

'''Boomstick: Gumball's next weapon of choice is a Paintball gun. Seriously?'''

Wiz: Gumball's paintbulls are hard and painful, and a good choice, as Gumball NEVER misses.

'''Boomstick: Oh, come on. He had to missed atleast once-'''

Wiz: Boomstick, I'm SERIOUS.

Boomstick: Okay, okay.

Wiz: Gumball's greatest weapon is... uh.... What is his other weapons?

'''Boomstick: Come on, he has to have someothers... any video games?'''

Wiz: Let me check.... Well, in one episode he can control electricity with insults.

'''Boomstick: Oh... I wanna see! (Sees the episode)Ooh.... burn.'''

Wiz: Next, when Gumball accidently ate Man-ios, which turns the user into a manly man. What?

Boomstick: Manly Gumball is much stronger and durable, able to run faster, and yet is much dumber.

Wiz: But watch out for Gumball, he someday may be the next Mickey Mouse....

Gumball tries to do a backflip kick but ends up falling.

Boomstick: Or not.