Board Thread:Wiki Management/@comment-27150398-20180211135035/@comment-30408599-20181216043331

Zacisawesome101 - I'll start by saying I'm not fond of the TN. It's not a big problem, but the TN looks weird since both combatants are looking in the same direction. Usually they face each other, or they both face forward. Again, not a big problem, just a nitpick.

Luigi's analysis is good, not much else to say honestly.

Nightwing's analysis was also pretty good, going into detail & explaining a little more in depth than Luigi's (probably caus DC's more specific than Mario Bros.).

Another small thing, the heading after your analyses is called "Interlude...Again", but most writers call this "Intermission". I think it'd make more sense to call it "Intermission" instead.

On to the fight, I like that it starts cause Luigi's accused of Goomba murder, that's something I fully support ( #savethegoombas ). The fight itself is superb. The action between Luigi & Nightwing fighting is great, & it does a good job of incorporating Nightwing's stealth tactics. I also thought it was funny how Luigi calls E. Gadd for a replacement Poltergust in the middle of the fight.

The finisher was really cool too, & brutal. How (spoiler) uses his (spoiler) to (spoiler) (spoiler) & (spoiler) him up before (spoilering) the (spoiler). I won't be spoiling that ending, but I agree with the outcome. More definitely could've been added to the results, but it does what it needs to.

Another great thing, you met all the word requirements, & there were hardly any grammar errors (there were like a couple small things). Overall, great job.

9/10

Before I post another fight to be reviewed, I want to do something a little different, probably just this once. I'm gonna review the first completed version of my first completed fight Dark Gaia vs Godzilla, for fun. I'mma try to be not biased, & treat it like it's someone else's fight.

Nothing= But you can skip it if you want.

(Hey thanks for stopping by)
 * -|Self-Review=

First of all, the TN could use some work. You'll want to keep from exposing the white spots cause it's not very professional.

Dark Gaia's analysis is okay, but there are some grammar errors, & too many "also", "another", & "not to mention" sentences.

Godzilla's analysis falls into the same problems as Dark Gaia's, having too many sentences starting with "And". It'd be better to either summarize all the info into one sentence, or use different words to start off each sentence.

Also, you put the rules after the intermission. You should've put it before the analyses so people can know ahead of time what all is being included for each combatant.

At the beginning of the fight's intro, you switch scenes from Dark Gaia to Godzilla with no segue. It'd be nice to add something like "Meanwhile" or "Later" in between the switch to indicate a change of scenes. There're also some writing issues that make it a little hard to understand what's happening.

As for the fight itself, fight 1 wasn't really necessary. Usually it's better to write your fight however you want, ignoring research until the ending/results where you decide your winner & explain the outcome. Fight 2 was pretty good, doing exactly what I just suggested. However, the starting & stopping of music cues is a little annoying. Maybe practice timing the music a little better so everything flows more.

Overall, nice first fight. Continue to work on improving & polishing your work.

6/10

With that out of the way, I would like some better criticism of this fight: Lopmon vs Buneary