User blog:Metal875/Leaving

Hello everyone. Now, I'm sure some of you seen my last blog; "Long overdue," but in there, I only said I was gonna stop writing fights and wasn't leaving...

That changes today. I want to go over the reasons I'm leaving and a little bit of a history lesson so you guys can learn a bit about me.

Why I Joined The Wiki
While growing up, I had went through some terrible times. At the age of fourteen--after my very long life--I was suffering from major depressive disorder. Honestly? I still haven't really shaken those thoughts even today. But at the time, this is the place I came to.

I really hated Death Battle at the time because they made Mario lose to Sonic, Luigi lose to Tails and Goku lose to Superman. These characters were the most pivotal childhood characters I had, and honestly? They helped me... a lot. Seeing them die in brutal ways kinda... unhinged me. Despite me liking Sonic back then and even today, at that period of my life, I hated Sonic characters and did anything I could to make them lose any fight possible.

So I made "Team Mario VS Team Sonic."

Team Mario VS Team Sonic
This is what sparked up some rough times on here... I made Team Mario win in spite of Death Battle's results. The teams were Mario, Luigi, Yoshi and Wario VS Sonic, Tails, Knuckles and Shadow.

This is when I was first introduced to Quauntonaut and Nkstjoa. Quaunt was, in my mind at the time, a guy who firmly stood by Death Battles' results. And Nk... well, I didn't have much opinion towards him. He disagreed with having rematches back then, and this fight was deleted.

Debates and Battles
I started commenting more on other peoples' battles after making Shadow Mario VS Dark Link (which back then, was just to go against SuperSaiyan2Link's Mario vs Link), and after having made Team Mario beat Team Sonic, Shadow Mario beat Dark Link, and then comment on other fights saying Mario beats Kirby... people started calling me a fanboy. A Mario fanboy. And unfortunately, the one that started this was Quaunt.

This is when my reputation started to go down a bit. I kinda became renowned as the Mario fanboy of the wiki, a role I partially shared with Hipper.

Bowser VS Godzilla
This was and still is the absolute low-point of my entire time on here. I hate this battle...

When I first commented somewhere on here that Bowser would stomp Godzilla, many people targeted me. They disagreed a lot, and once I asked about Godzilla, I got directed to Des, the Godzilla expert. We debated a bit, and eventually, he asked if I wanted to collab with him on Bowser VS Godzilla. I accepted, and we began...

But, once I debated with him, we came kinda to a standstill. However, he conceded with me and allowed Bowser to win. Once the battle was finished, minutes later, people began commenting about it. It started with a few, and then everyone jumped onto the bandwagon. I felt like one of the worst people alive solely because I made Bowser win that fight. And when Quaunt pointed out that Des apparently only had Bowser win because of me, I was targeted even more. People started saying, "Who made this?"

"Metal Mario875."

"Oh, that makes sense."

And at the time, this didn't help me with my depression at all. Surprisingly though... I was fine. I was pretty damn persistent for someone of my caliber.

But after this, Des started talking to me more. We started to become friends, began collaborating more often, and would sometimes just talk for the sake of talking.

It was awhile after this that I recall something happening.

My Break
For the sole reason of Des being a friend to me, I still didn't want to leave the wiki. But... my family went through some financial declines, and we lost internet for several months. It was during this time that I got three messages concerned about me; one from Bon, one from Des, and one from Chompy, in that order. When I came back and seen them concerned about me... honestly? I felt kinda happy, but bad at the same time.

I felt happy because someone cared to take the time out of their day and make a message for me.

I felt bad because they wanted to do it in the first place.

In my mind, people not being concerned about me was a good thing. It takes a weight off my back and off theirs. It makes it easier on both of us; they don't have to spend energy caring about me, and I don't have to spend energy living up to their worries.

But eventually I could send a few messages under an acquaintance's account; Graced Gnome88. I commented on the Mario page and explained my ordeal. I was kinda happy when I got responses from people like Quaunt, Des, etc.

After that, it took awhile longer, but I finally returned at the end of 2015. I ended up getting apologies from several users, and... honestly? Things started to get better. But then...

The Remodeling
The wiki changed.

New users came, and the place slowly dove itself into a pit of memes it is still fighting to dig itself out of today. And my motivation at that point began to decline... I was doing more in real life, and I didn't have the interest to write fights on here anymore. And honestly? I still don't. None. At all.

This is also the point when users I had grown accustomed to and made friends with began to leave.

I had many disputes with Shrek and Kook, but they and I eventually made up. We both even planned collabs before they left, but... well, we couldn't finish them.

Des got less active and eventually made his own blog about leaving, and before that, Para left.

Then Quaunt, Digi, and now even Hipper are all gone. Every single friend I made back in the day has left, and... honestly? That doesn't make me want to stay at all.

I've made new friends, like Paleo, Adam, Wither, Sebas, Bat and Arceus, but all of them are active on CSaP, one wiki I actually enjoy and have motivation to stick around in.

And with that, I conclude my history here.

Why I'm Leaving

 * This place is a mean-spirited garbage dump for memes; plain and simple. Like said, it's a bandwagon that if one or two people insult someone, everyone jumps in. It's like sheep flocking to the herder, and it annoys me to no end.
 * An example of it's mean-spirited ways are the whole "Hipper Wario" thing. Hipper's a really cool guy, and I would like to say he's a friend of mine. So it really does suck how literally everyone pesters and invades his personal space, bickering about his name and past, one that he's openly admitted to be wrong and tried to cover up countless times that people simply won't stop digging back up. This isn't a meme, this is harassment. And falsely labeling it as that doesn't make it okay to do.
 * Another thing about this place is... you can't share your opinion. You simply can't. And if you do, you better prepare for a storm if it's not popular. Some could argue this is "criticism," and people have a right to that. You're only half correct if you reply with that. Yes, people have a right to doll out criticism; CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Almost all pieces of criticism here and destructive; and I don't know if that's even possible to change. Furthermore, while every wiki has them, it's annoying how many trolls appear here, and I simply don't want to be apart of that.
 * Horrific chat behavior
 * I remember one time discussing politics in chat. Yeah, sure, it's a touchy subject; but when discussing the election between Trump and Hillary, I defended Trump's victory over Hillary for several reasons. And apparently, one of the users was a Mexican. When I said that our national interests should be prioritized over the needs of refugees, I was immediately attacked for my nationalist belief, and I recall being told to "shut up, my beliefs didn't matter, #theirlivesmatter, and if you say anything else, you'll be kicked from chat." How is that fair? How was I supposed to know the user's lineage, and why am I singled out and told that I shouldn't be allowed to speak? That's wrong. And to my knowledge, stuff like that hasn't changed. This relates back to the mean-spirited atmosphere, which is honestly the root of all evil in this place... that and memes.
 * My own personal issues
 * I don't really indulge in Death Battle too much anymore, nor do I have the motivation to write any Death Battles.

Thanks To Some People
Most of these people have left--if not all of them--but I still want to express gratitude.

BonBooker
You were the first person to greet me when I first joined back on the OMM Fanon Wiki and asked you if I could adopt Shadow VS Albert Wesker. Ever since then, you've helped me out in miscellaneous discussions, and were also one of the people who sent me a message concerned about me during my break. I appreciate all the concern, and all the nice things you've done for me, bro. I wish you the best.

ImagoDesattrolante
I said almost everything I could to you the day you left, but you were the only true and genuine friend I feel I ever had on here. Ever since the start, you were one of the singular people who weren't so rude and mean-spirited; at least not to me. And all the concern--from the message while I was gone, to the defense in Bowser VS Godzilla (risking your own reputation, too), to the talks we had and even reverting edits people made to my profile when I wasn't looking... you were nothing but kind to me, and I truly appreciate your friendship in ways you couldn't imagine. If you're reading this, again, take care, bro. :)

Chompy-King
I remember the talks you, me and Des had... back then, it was us three that were "the three amigos," as some might call it, lol.

But for real, Chompy, while I never got to know you as much as I wanted to, you were one of the people that acted like I was their friend and called me their friend without any hesitation. You were also one of the three that sent me a message during my absence. I appreciate your concern and friendship, and if you ever see this, I hope the world favors your future.

Quauntonaut
While we started out on really bad terms, and stayed that way for awhile, you were one of the nicest people I knew once you and I made up. You and Des were the first people to greet me when I came back, and the way you talked always made it nice to be around you. Thank you for being kind man, and if you ever see this, I hope you live a great life.

Conclusion
If you weren't on that list, that does not mean I hate you nor that I don't appreciate you. Digilord 64 is another one of my best friends, and Fedora Lord Para 348 as well as Danibom have backed me up on a few occasions, I just didn't have anything I got from them besides friendship or a few nice deeds. That section was about a few people that truly did something huge for me, so... yeah.

Anyway, this means goodbye. The only wiki I'll be on from now on will be Characters Stats and Profiles, and maybe occasionally VS Battles. I really don't want to be here anymore.

So... I wish you all the best! :D