User blog:Pikazilla/THE WEAKEST CHARACTER IN ALL OF FICTION

'DISCLAIMER: This blog is about a Glitch Pokemon.'' I am fully aware that this is not an official character. I am fully aware that this wiki does not recognize Glitch Pokemon pages. However I still want to discuss this. I don't care if you dismiss this character; it's more of a proof of concept more than anything else. For the sake of argument; I am considering this character as a real pokemon and combatant. If you find this offensive or blasphemous, if you disagree with my analysis based on the legitimacy of the character: I don't care.'''

I know that this wiki is all about who would win a duel, but I also enjoy Joke Characters; combatants that technically are combatants but are never meant to lose.

I have found the ultimate joke character; one that is so pathetic that it is impossible to win with it. His name is either ??????????, also known as ten question marks. But for this blog I will address him by the fan-name: Decamark (or his later counterpart Invisible Shiny Bulbasaur) ​









'(For the majority of this blog, I will be observing Decamark via his default depiction; like how he's obtained through Walk-Through-Walls'' glitch). There are about 65,097 variations of Decamarks, which is why I'm not considering anything but the default lv 0 version; waaaay too much to analyze or discuss.​'''

Shown as a bland ? or a yellow bulbasaur: Decamark is nothing incarnate. With 0 stats, INCLUDING HP, no moves and no ability; it is infinity weaker than a lv1 Caterpie facing a Fire Gym.

It has no offensive options, not even the move Struggle, and since it has no HP it basically faints automatically (or when it gets hit by anything, it depends). The only things it does have are; 50-50 sex ratio, a footprint (okay...), an ?????????? item (which does nothing), an obscure pokedex entry, and he's a normal type.

I will mention that Invisible Shiny Bulbasaur knows Struggle; but he instantly dies from the recoil while the enemy gets 1 point of damage. Only a Shedinja that intentionally lets its guard down is going to be threatened by this. 

How he Compares
Just to show how absurd Decamark is; I'm going to compare him with some of the most infamous combatants I know; (This section is skippable)

The best vs the worst
What I find to be hilarious about Decamark is that he's an 'Anti-Horakthy' (or Exodia). For those who don't know; Horakthy is possibly the most OP character in all of fiction; not only is it god, the representation and creator of everything, but she automatically wins any duel regardless of what her opponent is: if Broly, Superboy Prime and Thanos fused together they still wouldn't last a second; they're not even in the same tier list. She is a 'duel-winner'.

Decamark is basically the only character I know that would be classified as a 'duel-loser'. If god is everything and so automatically wins, Decamark automatically loses for being nothing.

Vs Magikarp
If Decamark is a pokemon then lets compare it to Magikarp.

As sad as a level 5 Magikarp is, splashing for 40 turns before it can use Struggle, it at the very least still has the possibility to attack and it still has SOME hp. Magikarp still wins, because at least splashing is better than ceasing to exist.

Vs Goomba
Goombas are so pathetically frail that a Small Toad can crush their 'skulls'. But since Decamark can't attack, even a Goomba can survive him. And while a Goomba is stupid enough to jump off cliffs, Decamarks still automatically die anyways. And a Goomba can still tackle and is faster than nothing, it can kill Decamark if Decamark doesn't already kick the bucket.

Vs Creeper
Now this is more of a tie than anything else, but it still counts as a loss. Afterall the Creeper intends to blow up anyways. In any case, Decamark lacks the speed or killing potential to defeat the Creeper before the Creeper blows up in his face. ISBulbasaur also can't do much; a good way to fight Creepers is with hit-and-run attacks or projectiles (while backpeddling), which ISB is too slow to do anyways.

Vs a potato
Yup, what if Decamark fought a potato? Well... nothing would happen...... yeah... The potato might eventually expire, but that's not a fight really. And ISB will kill itself if it attacks, and I don't know how to define a 'fainted potato' in a pokemon sense.

Side note: this scenario can also apply to Yugioh monsters with 0 ATK / DEF like Thousand Eyes Idol.

The Only Possibility
As far as I know, the only character who could reasonably lose against Decamark in a 1 on 1 format is Yubel (default form, cardgame format: so not Jaiden's yandere waifu).

Yubel only deals direct damage, she cannot destroy other monsters, and her direct damage is based on her opponent's power. Since Decamark has 0 stats, Yubel can't do any damage. And Yubel destroys herself if she has no tributes. So in that scenario; Yubel cannot attack and quickly dies.

This situation is very odd; especially since a Yubel deck would compensate for her costs and weaknesses. And I'm sure there are other examples out there. But this does seems to be a case of 'who kills themself first' and ISBulbasaur might kill itself if it fought Yubelkunwaifusama.

So with that said, let me hear your thoughts on the matter; who else will lose to nothingness?