Henry Stickmin Vs. Steve (Minecraft)

Description
Ahh, Flash Games, and Minecraft too, I guess...Which of these two random platform creators will win?

Interlude
'''Boomstick: You know what I hate more than Minecraft? Teenage pop-stars! But Minecraft is my new second-to-last, Wiz!'''

Wiz: There's also...Uh...

Boomstick: Who the hell is stick boy over there?

Wiz: That's Henry Stickmin, common Stick criminal.

Boomstick: And Steve, *sigh* that damn block-placer from Minecraft.

Wiz: I'm Wiz and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyse their weapons, powers and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE.

Henry Stickmin
Wiz: Imagine living on the edge from homeless and having a roof over your head. That was what Henry Stickmin was living like.

'''Boomstick: Until he tried to break into a bank...and failed. Then he tried to break out of prison...and failed! Again and again, and again, and again...'''

Wiz: (abrupt) That' beside the point. The point is that Henry can break into, and out of, almost everywhere.

Boomstick: Beside from having the most unoriginal naming for a stickman ever, Henry has never done these things alone.

Wiz: Henry has lots-and I mean LOTS of weapons, tools and materials to get him anywhere, though like everyone, he has his favourites.

Boomstick: He has a motor-scooter or a motorbike, grenades, pistols, machine guns, balloons, helium, Power Suits, Model Planes, Adrenaline, tons of video game references...

Wiz: The Scooter can get him anywhere he needs to go on land, grenades which, well, blow up stuff-

Boomstick: ...And teleporters, pennies, crowbars portal guns, Tunisian diamonds-

Wiz: Boomstick, stop!

* silence*

Wiz: Moving on, Henry is lightning quick and has lightning reflexes. He was able to quickly climb out of a truck falling from a cliff to save himself. He can also move faster than sound AND light, moving in the blink of an eye.

Boomstick: He was able to quickly escape a museum after it was being destroyed by a giant robot and can use Sonic's speed shoes to move even faster.

Wiz: Unfortunately, most of his gadgets ended up, well...

(A montage of Henry Stickmin fails show up on screen.)

Boomstick: Yep, 95% of his weapons can hurt or even kill him, his teleporter which can teleport him to any location almost always never works.

Wiz: But sometimes he can be harmed and succeed, when using his Minecraft Pickaxe-

'''Boomstick: WHAT?! So let me get this straight...Henry Stickmin is fighting Minecraft Steve and has a pickaxe from Minecraft? Small world.'''

Wiz: These aren't his only weapons, he has many random weapons, ranging from pennies, to guns to even Fallout Power Armour, speaking of which, he was able to survive the weight of.

Boomstick: He also fell from over 900 feet in a tank and was completely fine, and may I add, WHO TRUSTED THIS GUY WITH A TANK?

Wiz: No idea...You see, while he has possessed some extraordinary powers, like earthbending, metal bending and pauperizing, he is incredibly naïve and often takes risks without thinking things through.

'''Boomstick: Yeah...He's an idiot. He used a spring to get up to a higher place, which ended up being quite loud, he attempted to sprint past a guard with a laser-spear and ran straight into a flashbang, the he fell out of an airship.'''

Wiz: This is probably most displayed during the Bungee Fail. You see, Henry attempted bungying with a REGULAR rope instead of elastic, resulting in his spine being yanked out of his body, killing him.

'''Boomstick: but half of his fails would have never been possible without the trusty Gadget Gabe. Gadget Gabe was able to create a Shadowser -a thing which turned Henry into a shadow, although he was killed by a regular shadow- and a Gravitor which was able to turn gravity to his favour, although he was killed because he didn't reset gravity.'''

Wiz: Although he has escaped the Wall, the most secure prison in almost ever, he is still human and is killed by the same thing that would kill humans, such as car crashes and gunshots.

Boomstick: Still...Henry Stickmin can escape and break into almost anything.

(Henry escapes from a money bag disguise and it caught in a truck heading toward a bank.)   

Steve
Wiz: In the world of Minecraft, there is a hero, a player, someone known across villages as the best of the best...

'''Boomstick: Put a sock in it! There's a blocky guy named Steve, OK?'''

Wiz: R-Right. Anyway, Steve can break and shatter, trees and brick with his bare hands. After 4 minutes, Steve can destroy obsidian, a block immune to TNT.

Boomstick: But if he wants some speedy mining to do, he can pull out his trusty pickaxe, which for this battle's purposes, will be diamond, the strongest material in Minecraft.

Wiz: This diamond pickaxe can destroy obsidian in 10 seconds instead of 4 minutes and can even hold two for good measure! These blocks can even be placed back down as a wall or structure of any sort.

'''Boomstick: It isn't even his only method of attack and defence. His sword can slice through almost any monster, his axe can break down wood with ease and his shovel can dig through dirt and sand like it was air.'''

Wiz: Although these materials don't last forever, they can last for months on end. Even if his diamond weapons do break, he can easily use either iron, gold, stone or wood versions of these weapons. and if those just don't cut it, he also has a bow and arrow.

'''Boomstick: These can shoot as many arrows at foes as he wants! Provided that he has lots in his inventory, and here lies his greatest weapon, his shear strength.'''

Wiz: That's right. Steve can hold up to 2,240 cubic meters of gold and still run around and jump like it was a single feather. This is even more amplified when you get to his armour, which gives him more protection and is one of his main defence methods.

Boomstick: Steve can also craft item ridiculously fast, which can tend to help is your current diamond weapons are running low.

Wiz: Steve isn't limited to swords and armour, either. He has a shield, which can completely negate all damage, a totem of undying, which, when held, protects and heals Steve after a seemingly fatal attack.

'''Boomstick: Steve also has lots of potions he can drink for battle. He can drink potions of strength, resistance (which can stop damage), high jumping, slow falling, fire resistance, regeneration and healing. He can also create splash and lingering potions, always used for poison, harming, wither, slowness and weakness.'''

Wiz: Poison can poison opponents, but it will not kill them. Harming potions simply harms the opponent, wither slowly kills the opponent, slowness slows them down and weakness weakens them.

Boomstick: Steve can also use buckets of water and lava as traps and can use ladders and torches to help him fight.

Wiz: Steve has face many monsters and can single-handedly killed the Ender Dragon and Wither Boss, both of whom can flatten buildings and cities like they were rubber.

'''Boomstick: Still, Steve is only human. Behind all his armour, potions and totems he is ultimately human underneath and can be killed easily if overpowered and outnumbered.'''

Wiz: He is also not much of a strategist and runs in and swings his sword before thinking.

Boomstick: When Steve's got his eyes on you, he will not stop.

(Steve kills a zombie in the dark.)    

Pre-Fight
Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all.

Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLEEEEEE!

Fight
Henry Stickmin breaks through a wall of a Minecraft building with TNT. He walks in and sees the prize: stacks of Gold Blocks. Henry approaches them but they are quickly snatched by a blocky human with a blue shirt and pants, Steve. Henry looks at the Gold in Steve's hands and he pulls out a heavy sword, which starts weighing him down. Steve pulls out his diamond sword.

Announcer: FIGHT!!!

Steve launches at Henry, jumps up and swings down, but Henry is able to block the attack. The sword is too heavy for Henry so he drops it and simply pulls out a pistol. Henry fires twice, one hits Steve so Steve quickly eats some food and pulls out his bow and arrow. Henry ducks behind a wall and fires at Steve, forcing him to run away. Two bullets enter Steve's leg and he gets down to half a heart. He pulls on diamond armour and draws a shield quick enough to stop more bullet fire. Steve grabs a few slowness and poison potions and throws them at Henry. He is forced to retreat further down the wall to avoid them. Steve appears around the corner holding a sword and shield and merely finds an X. Steve hears a penny hit the ground and he's distracted. In a split second, he's sideswiped by a wrecking ball. Steve's diamond helmet, leggings an boots all fly off as he hits the floor and rolls over. Henry celebrates his victory and dances before seeing the huge iron ball flying back at him. He escaped just in time, as a second later, the wrecking ball destroys the vehicle. Henry snaps his fingers and sees some minecart tracks leaving in the distance. Henry smiles and enters his motor-scooter as he chases after Steve.

Steve sits peacefully on his minecart, enjoying the breeze when he hears a rumbling sound. Just behind him, Henry angrily tries to catch up, but the minecart is too fast. Henry shoots a grappling hook out of the scooter and it just manages to catch on the minecart, blasting him forward. Henry's scooter slips under his feet and is left in the dust. Henry's being dragged across the sand. Henry's hands start to slip and as he slides through the sand, Steve re-equips all his weapons and armour. Henry slowly gets up and pulls out a Tunisian Diamond. He throws it up a tree and climbs up. Steve looks around for Henry and drinks a Regeneration, Resistance and Strength Potion. The Tunisian Diamond is pushed off the tree and lands right next to Steve. Henry falls out the tree and pulls out a sonic pulse gun. He starts blasting sound until both Steve's and Henry's ears get close to bursting. Henry starts squeezing the trigger even more. Steve pulls out a bow and arrow and fires, knocking the sonic pulse gun out of Henry's hands. Henry eats a sandwich and becomes incredibly strong and starts punching Steve, the Resistance Potion doing little to help. Steve drinks a potion of swiftness and runs off, Henry running after him, although he comes across the Power Armour. Steve looks back and sees Henry in Power armour shooting bullets and missiles at him. A missile follows Steve and lands right on his back. A huge explosion rings out, but Steve isn't fazed. he smiles and drops the remainder of the Totem of Undying on the ground. Henry is caught off-guard but shoots another missile. Steve pulls out his sword and smacks the missile back to sender, exploding in Henry's face and destroying the Power Armour.

Henry lies on the ground, dazed and tired. He looks at Steve, who quickly pulls out a pickaxe and digs downward, building a huge tunnel. Henry stands up and looks triumphant as he ties a rope to his back, looking down the hole. He jumps down, quickly chasing after Steve. As the rope reaches it's end, Steve starts building off to the right. Henry screams before the rope stops abruptly, ripping his spine from his body. (Luckily, he's a stickman so there's no blood or gore)

K.O!!

Post-Battle Analysis
'''Boomstick: Nooo! Why does Steve have to win!'''

Wiz: Steve's strength and arsenal quickly outmatched Henry's. Henry struggles to lift one Tunisian Diamond, Steve could carry hundreds. Even if Henry were able to land a good missile shot on him in the Power Armour, Steve would be fine thanks to Totems of Undying.

Boomstick: *sigh* I guess you're right, also, Henry doesn't have the potions Steve has and one splash from any of the bad ones would leave him open for the kill.

Wiz: I'm positive that in some circumstances Henry could win, but more times than not, his risk-taking and Steve's arsenal would overpower him.

Boomstick: The winner is Steve...