Emperor Joker VS Dimentio

Description
DC Comics VS Paper Mario! It's a battle of god like clowns! Which one will warp their way to victory?

Interlude
Wiz: Of all the beings in fiction to arise to god like status and wreak havoc on the world...why did it have to be clowns?

Boomstick: Like Emperor Joker, the clown god of crime.

Wiz: And Dimentio, the reality warping enemy of Paper Mario.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.

Emperor Joker
Cue Joker's Theme-Batman the Animated Series

Wiz: Our story begins with Superman, the Man of Steel...in Arkham Asylum.

Boomstick: Prepare your minds ladies and gentlemen this one's gonna be weird.

Wiz: The place being headed by Solomon Grundy and Calendar Man, the weirdest duo since Dennis Rodman and Jean-Claude van Damme, Superman busted out of Arkham, gets the shit kicked out of him by Bizarro(leader of the Justice League), thrown back in jail-

'''Boomstick: Stop stop! Please god! I just got over a migraine...'''

Wiz: Flash forward a little bit and we learn that Joker stole pretty much all of the power from Mr. M-m

The word "Mxyzptlk" appears on the screen

Boomstick: That guy's power, turning into essentially...god.

Wiz: Comic books. Because fuck you that's why.

'''Boomstick: OK YOU KNOW WHAT! LETS STOP TRYING TO EXPLAIN THIS STORYLINE BECAUSE IT'S ALL JUST GODDAMN FILLER FOR THIS ANALYSIS BECAUSE EMPEROR JOKER HAS BARELY EVER APPEARED IN ONE FUCKING COMIC SERIES. Lets move forward and talk about his abilities please....'''

Wiz: Oh thank Jesus...anyway, Joker's powers are fucking crazy, being able to warp reality to his liking. If he can think it, he can make it happen. He can even take away the Earth's very gravity!

Boomstick: He ripped out Superman's heart, made Darkseid his bitch, punched Superman into outer space, and changed Harley Quinn into a constellation.

Wiz: Wha-bu- fuck it, not ONLY did he create a bomb that destroyed the entire universe and recreate it in his own image, keep in mind he has the same power as Mr. Mxy-fuck it I'm not saying the name, who wound up destroying the entire FUCKING MULTIVERSE during an argument with Batmite over who was better between SUPERMAN AND BATMAN. And we thought the YouTube comment section was bad....Keep in mind, absolutely none of this was exaggerating. He can casually create universes for gods sake! Not insane enough for you? The Spectre said that he was powerful enough to destroy every universe that ever was.

Boomstick: ....okay I'm not gonna pretend like I LIKED CLOWNS TO BEGIN WITH but I'm never going to the circus again.

Wiz: There's...really not much else to talk about...I mean he did...this...

Boomstick can be heard vomiting

''Emperor Joker: Where's the fun in that?! AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!''

Dimentio
Cue The Ultimate Show-Super Paper Mario OST

Wiz: Very little is known about Dimentio's past-

Boomstick: Thank God!

Wiz: He is a freelance mercenary hired by Count Bleck, probably to help him kill the Mario Bros. and stuff.

'''Boomstick: Wise choice, since Dimentio can do all kinds of fun stuff! Like using reality warping magic to teleport and launch balls of energy.'''

Wiz: He is able to create a compact magic field around his victims in which he simply snaps his fingers, which causes several explosions within the field.

'''Boomstick: BOOM! Heh heh....nice. Hey, think maybe he could do the effects for the next Mich-'''

Wiz: EVERYONE does the Michael Bay joke...

'''Boomstick: Moving on, he can do Shadow Clone Jutsu and clone himself to inflict double the pain. He can even turn invisible!'''

Wiz: He has things called Floro sprouts that can mind control anyone he puts their heads on with.

Boomstick: I always knew pot could be used for mind control...

Wiz: Riiiiiight. Anyway, Dimentio's main power comes from him being able to manipulate, well, dimensions. He can shift and even create them.

'''Boomstick: He also has a "Warp". A square expands then contracts on the teleporting object, making it disappear with a sound while a small shock-wave distorts the air around it.'''

Wiz: He easily killed Mario, Luigi, Peach and Bowser who were all able to survive the void. However, his ultimate power comes when he unleashes his ultimate form-Super Dimentio

'''Boomstick: He can't normally access the move without Luigi but...fuck it we're bending the rules so that the universe can get destroyed. By the way, this guy can straight up destroy multiverses so...stay the FUCK out of his way!'''

''Dimentio: You must be Bowser. I knew the moment I saw the flailing nubbins you call arms.''

Death Battle


October 31st, 2015. Halloween night. Spooky decorations were set up and children Trick-Or-Treating running about, wearing costumes of ghouls and goblins.

And Dimentio was hovering about undetected. He was bored you see, and was trying to find something to do. He saw someone dressed as a clown like king. He asked the child who he was dressed as and he responded with "Emperor Joker!" then went on his merry way.

Dimentio became curious. He did some research via "fuck you reality warping" and found that Emperor Joker was a god like jester much like himself. He felt like fighting him because, once again, he was REALLY bored. He did his thing again and traveled to the dimension where this "Joker" lived.

Speaking of which, Emperor Joker himself was sitting on his throne, and wouldn't you know it he was bored out his mind too. "Goddammit I want to do SOMETHING. I mean it's Halloween for gods sa-"

Suddenly, Dimentio appeared in the room, giggling a bit.

"Oh look! A Trick-Or Treater! Lets give him some CANDY!" Joker said with a laugh, as he warped a large pile of candy into the air and threw it at Dimentio, who dodged just in time to see each piece explode like a miniature nuke, mushroom cloud and all.

Cue The Ultimate Show-Remix

The two clowns laughed and readied their warping shit.

RIP Everything

FIGHT!

Dimentio launched several spheres of light at the Joker, who blocked every last shot with funhouse mirrors. He then launched the mirrors at Dimentio, smacking him in the face several times, each with a cartoon sound effect to boot. Dimentio teleported over and kicked Joker in the face. He then turned invisible, landing several hits on Joker while the victim failed any attempt to retaliate until screaming "ENOUGH" and causing several cartoonish sound waves with the very shout.

The Clown Prince of Crime cackled manically as he pulled out a boxing glove cannon, launching the mechanical arm at Dimentio's face several times, once again creating silly sounds with each blow. Dimentio jumped back and launched more spheres at Joker, some hitting their mark, others being taken out by Joker's thrown playing cards, which exploded on impact. "Can't fault the classics!" Joker said, as he shot more cards at Dimentio, all of them exploding on impact and sending Dimentio flying out of that reality.

Dimentio landed in another... dimension and got up, wondering where he was. He looked around and saw a man swing by on what seemed like a web. Suddenly, the impact of a large fist was felt on the back of Dimentio's head, as he turned around to see Joker standing there with gigantic boxing gloves. Dimentio created a square around the Joker, and snapped his fingers, causing several explosions. These explosions were powerful enough to take out the Earth in one shot. The planet destroyed, millions dead, and two clowns still fighting for supremacy. What a world huh?

Dimentio realized that Joker was simply laughing off the planet bursting explosion. That was the last day for everyone on Earth, but for Joker, it was Saturday. Make that Tuesday, as he literally warped it so that Halloween was on Tuesday instead of Saturday so that the joke would work better.

Dimentio flew into another dimension, with the Joker right on his tail. "This is fun" Dimentio thought to himself as he glided through several universes. He saw a fully 3D version of his nemesis, a blue rat thing, and even himself in an alternate reality...just some party clown huh. Bummer.

Joker kicked Dimentio in the face mid transport, which caused the fabric of reality to tear a tiny bit. It wasn't coming completely undone though. Not yet.

Dimentio flew into the dimension with himself in it. He looked at his alternate self and sent him somewhere safe. He didn't feel like seeing himself die. Joker flew in and warped in a giant...banana cream pie. He threw it, missing Dimentio completely and hitting the sun, which proceeded to explode, causing a supernova that ended the Earth. Two Earths gone in record time. Damn.

Joker grabbed Dimentio by the throat and strangled him. "Why you little-" he said, quoting the lovable Simpsons' father. Dimentio teleported out of Joker's grasp, sending spheres of energy at Joker, who dodged them all by wobbling his limbs like noodles. Dimentio snapped his fingers and cloned himself, attacking the King with all his might. "Two can play at that game-" Joker said, cloning himself as well "-or should I say four?". After saying the last part in unison, the two Emperors clashed with the two Dimentios, matching each other blow for blow, cartoon sound effect for cartoon sound effect, and even joke for joke, making witty one liners throughout the sparring match. I'd make a joke here, but you've already made them in your head haven't you?

Dimentio planted a sprout on the clone Joker's head and mind controlled it into attacking the real Joker. Said real Joker clapped his hands like he was turning off a light, causing the clone to disappear. Dimentio decided to dimension hop again, this time to a barren wasteland filled with nothing but death.

"You know, you DID kill Marvel so I should give you credit for that, but boy do you pick the most uninteresting battle grounds..." A voice behind Dimentio said. Whipping around, Dimentio got a face full of acid, that luckily he was durable enough to survive, but it still hurt like a bastard.

Screaming in pain turned to laughing in amusement as Dimentio created several clones of himself, literally throwing them as projectiles at Joker, who swatted away most with ease, but was caught off guard by some of them, being thwacked in the face with 1960s Batman punch effects appearing like "BAM!" and "BIFF!"

Joker warped a large bazooka into his hand-one powerful enough to destroy entire solar systems in just one shot. He fired rockets at Dimentio, who dodged out of the way of them(each flew off into different dimensions due to Dimentio warping them there, where they blew up a lot of shit) and turned invisible. The Joker laughing wildly fired rockets despite the fact that he couldn't see Dimentio. Dimentio then appeared behind Joker and launched a sphere directly into the bazooka, then teleported away. Joker looked at the camera and shrugged.

BOOM!

Dimentio was gone, off in yet another dimension. He really likes going through those things huh? Joker appears in the same one, cartoonishly covered in ash. He wasn't REALLY hurt to be honest, and shook off the ash. "Wanna see a magic trick?" he asked, warping a really REALLY big pencil from nowhere. He slammed it down, but Dimentio narrowly avoided it. Joker grabbed Dimentio by the shirt. "Now we're playin' the game MY way!"

He meant "Game" literally.

A flash of light and suddenly everything was...pixelated. Yes this is actually happening. Why? How? In Alucard's words "Fuck you that's how"

Cue Boss Battle Theme-Batman Return of the Joker

Joker appeared, floating down from the sky towards the pixelated Dimentio. "DIMENTIO! WELCOME TO DIE!" he said with a laugh, punching Dimentio so hard that ANOTHER planet blew up. Dimentio thought to himself "Enough of this shit" and warped the world back to normal.

Cue Halloween Town Combat-Kingdom Hearts II

Dimentio snapped his fingers, causing several explosions directly in Joker's face. Joker then decided to stop fuckin' around. He didn't get serious, fuck that noise, but he DID start amping up the reality warping, creating cartooning guns the size of planets and firing them all in Dimentio's direction. He took all the hits in stride, and knew that he needed to step up his game if he was gonna compete.

Dimentio then entered his final form-Super Dimentio.

Joker, seeing the large creature standing in front of him, laughed and grew himself in size to see him eye to eye. The collided attacks, causing about 3-4 universes to be instantly destroyed with a satisfying explosion. Piece by piece, the multiverse itself was being ripped apart.

Dimentio launched a ball of energy at Joker, which missed, destroyed another universe along with it.

Joker began slapping Dimentio, not with his hand, but with a...rubber chicken. A giant. Universe ending. Rubber. Chicken.

Dimentio felt each and every blow weakening him. He destroyed the chicken and kicked Joker in the crotch. Joker fell to his giant knees in pain. "You sunnavagun I'm gonna get ya fer that!" Joker said, talking in a cowboy style voice whilst wearing a cowboy style outfit.

Changing out of it in the next shot, Joker was now wearing the uniform of a baseball player as he said "Swing batta batta batta!", hitting Dimentio with a large baseball bat, crashing him through many different universes, destroying each and every one with relative ease.

Cue This is Halloween-Kingdom Hearts II Remix

Dimentio got up and created several explosions, destroying even more, all of them landing on Joker, but only slightly weakening him.

Dimentio tried again and again with explosions and energy spheres and reality warping but couldn't do anything to stop Joker from walking slowly towards him, cackling all the way. Dimentio was drained. Joker grabbed him by the throat, saying "Time for the grand finale!" before creating about 50 of the universal bombs.

He was gonna make sure Dimentio went out with a-

BANG!

Stop muisc

Each bomb exploded, tearing apart everything. Super Dimentio screamed as Emperor Joker laughed. Eventually, everything was white, like a flashbang grenade had gone off, times infinity. When it faded back in, there was just....nothingness. Pure and simple nothingness. It was basically a white room with no windows or doors. Just one clown standing there. Emperor Joker had destroyed everything. And now he was chuckling to himself as he plotted what he would do when he remade it all in his very own image...again.

KO!

Results
Boomstick:...Well then.

Wiz: In his base form, Dimentio is only around large star level, leaving him outclassed by Emperor Joker completely. He only really stood a chance when he went Super.

'''Boomstick: And even then, Joker was stated to have enough power to destroy any universe that has ever existed and ever will exist! Dimentio's got nothing on that kind of power.'''

Wiz: Emperor Joker also had more versatility with his reality warping, being able to do anything his twisted mind could come up with, while Dimentio's much more limited in that regard.

Boomstick: I guess Dimentio couldn't stop clowning around enough to earn a victory.

Wiz: The winner is Emperor Joker.