Spongebob Squarepants VS Dipper Pines

Intro
Wiz: Two unpredictable characters, both from rival companies. Both have gone on some of the craziest magical adventures. Each smart in their own way.

'''Boomstick: Spongebob! The sea's best frying cook jellyfishing idiotic sponge!'''

Wiz: And Dipper! The world saving magical heroic kid!

'''Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. And no I did not steal this line. It's are job to analyze their stats, weapons, feats to decide WHO WOULD WIN A DEATH BATTLE!!!'''

Who do you think wins? Rooting and Voting Spongebob Rooting and Voting Dipper Rooting Spongebob but Voting Dipper Rooting Dipper but Voting Spongebob

Spongebob SquarePants
Wiz: Ah, underwater, under an island, is a little town called Bikini Bottom. And there is one person that almost everyone knows in Bikini Bottom, and that would be Spongebob SquarePants! '''Boomstick: Oh yeah. He's always wanted to be a fry cook when he was young, and his dream came true at Bikini Bottoms most popular fast food eatery. The Krusty Krab!''' Wiz: With his trusty spatula (or as Spongebob calls him, Spat), Spongebob is a very dangerous enemy to cope with. Lets get on with his stats thoguh.

Stats
Wiz: As you can see, putting a 4 in. sponge aint gonna do well against a human, which is why we will make Spongebob the same height as Dipper and 3/4 the height of Dipper!
 * Height: 4 in.
 * Weight:1 Ounce
 * Interests: Karate, Bubble BLowing, Krabby Patties, Music, Dancing and Jellyfishing
 * Favorite Quote: I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready!

Weapons

 * Spatula- Can act like a sword, lever, ect.
 * Spicy Bubbles- Bubbles so hot and spicy, they can burn through anything and alsmost anyone!
 * Karate Gear- Like Sandy, Spongebob is a master at karate. Pretty good at ambushng too.
 * Magic Page- Apparently, Spongebob can create reality in his own mind. It is confirmed by the Sponge Out of Water video game that Spongebob has a magic page in his head!
 * Jellyfishing Net- Can hold up to one hundred jelly fish at a time, is very hard to escape.
 * Annoying Laughter- Self Explanitory
 * The Invincibubble- Can put things or foes in bubbles that can't be destroyed unless they are part of Spongebob's team.
 * The Quickster- How fast can the quickster go? If he did it within 3 seconds and couldn't see him, and the distance between Spongebob and the mountain was 3 miles, also adding the depth of the mountain, the best I could estimate is probably more than the speed of light. I don't wanna do math today. So if someone can tell me the measurments and how to figure this out, I'd appreciate it xD.
 * Goofy Goober Rock- Once in final form, CANNOT fly, but can shoot lasers from guitar.