Talk:Star Butterfly vs Elsa/@comment-27231329-20161115154022

Alright, giving this a quick read-over, here's some key things I think you should make an effort to improve.

Keep in mind, I'm by no means an expert, and this is just my opinion, so please don't think of it as authorative or imposing.

1. Length.

This fight as a whole is pretty short, including the analyses, conflict, and explanation. This simply requires a better sense of writing to 'fluff' things out with information that feels relevant. Check out Para's Shadow Vs. Mewtwo for a good example of this. You'll find that he stuffs the analysis of both combatants with backstory, abilities, and feats in a way that is not absurdly long, but also not too short. If you ever feel like a combatant doesn't have much material to work with, you could try compositing them. For example, I noticed your Elsa analysis was rather short, in large part due to her lacking abilities. For future reference, you could use Disney Infinity abilities to pad out her arsenal.

2. Grammar/Capitalization/Sense.

Something I see many fights plagued by is grammer and capitalization. This isn't really something I can go in-depth on; you simply need to make a better effort to use proper gramatics and ESPECIALLY capitalization. Without it, fights end up looking rather unorganized and sloppy.

3. Characterization.

I understand that Boomstick and Wiz aren't always the easiest characters for people to write, but I find the COMBATANTS' characterization much more important. While you didn't do anything awfully out of character with Elsa, some lines felt off and awkward. Paired with no quotation marks, choppy exchanges of dialogue, and well, hardly an enthralling reason for a fight to the death, this could definitely use some work.

Overall, though, it's not a bad fight. You certainly didn't start off horribly, and if you really put in the effort, this can become something great.