Wolverine vs Steve

It’s Microsoft vs Marvel, which super durable Bear Grylls man will win a DEATH BATTLE.

 

Wiz: survival, this is essential to live and strive and to adapt to your surroundings.

Boomstick: and no two people give us a thought of survival like these two guys

Wiz: Steve, the miner who has been to hell( the nether) and back and slayer of the ender dragon

Boomstick: and the Wolverine, the viscous, mutant anti hero of the X-Men

Boomstick: He’s Wiz and I’m Boomstick

Wiz: in this battle we will limit Steve’s arsenal to make the battle fair

Wiz: and it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a death battle.

 

STEVE ANALYSES:

 

Wiz: The world of Minecraft is a peaceful place full of lots of trees, plants, animals, and minerals and the world is made out of blocks, a perfect setting isn’t it boomstick.

Boomstick: BORING!!!!!!

Wiz: until it turns night, that's when monsters like zombies, arching skeletons, exploding moss monsters, and tall teleporting black humanoids

Boomstick: RACIST!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wiz:..SIGH…

Wiz: Anyways, there is one man who is isolated from other people and has natural survival skills, this man is Steve.

Boomstick: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, STEVE, REALLY I THOUGHT THIS WAS GONNA BE A BADASS

Wiz: Steve is a man of super strength, being able to punch through wood, stone, and iron with his bare hands. and he does this one handed.

Boomstick: Never mind I’ll take it back this guy is a badass, he can bench 4.4 billion pounds, and he carries tons of gold and can still run at full speed and jump as high as usual. and also strikes with a force of 1 million pounds

Boomstock: NOW LET'S GET TO THE WEAPONS!!!!!!

Wiz: he usually carries a iron sword  and iron armor, this world's iron is stronger than regular iron because it can tank explosions if crafted into tools, weapons, and armor, and can stand up to a guy who can punch with 1 million pounds of force and can resist lava only if on the user

Boomstick: and he has a diamond sword and diamond armor which is the strongest armor in his world and can take more punishment than his iron gear.

Boomstick: THIS GUY'S WEAPONS ARE RIDICULOUS WHAT NEXT A TEN BARREL

SHOTGUN AND A BOTTLE OF INFINITE BEER

Wiz: he doesn’t have the technology to make guns and beer is a no no in a survival situation, he can’t get drunk while trying to look for materials, sorry to break it to you

Boomstock: aw s$$t

Wiz: but he does have a bow that can deal a lot of damage and an arrow shot from that bow can pierce through bedrock which is an invincible substance in his world. and a man of that strength shooting an arrow at you that would not stick into you it would go right through you

Wiz: he also has TNT which is powerful enough to destroy anything in his world besides obsidian and bedrock and the lava and fire is hot enough to destroy even bedrock which is invincible.

Boomstick: bit he has ender pearls which let him teleport where it lands pretty handy to get out of sticky situations and he even has a healing factor but it's not that fast and he needs to be on a full stomach to or one hunger bar down to heal him, and he has MAGIC, like healing, strength, swiftness, night vision, jump boost, and even invisibility and water breathing, he also damaging potion like damage, poison, weakness, and slowness. he a very smart and a strategist, and diamond pickaxe which can break through rock and metals and even gems and can survive extreme heat of the nether and the extreme cold of the taiga biome, is there anything this guy can't do.

Wiz: Well…….. he’s not bendable and his blocky body doesn't have very fast reflexes

Boomstick: he also doesn’t have experience with sword to sword combat but he has even better strategy swing, swing, and swing some more, and with that strength he will able to make that strategy work and he can survive great falls and even has a shield that just as tough as his iron armor.

Wiz: but his gear has durability and his abnormal durability has a limit and he mainly weak to lava and explosions and a fire projectile can catch his whole body on fire but his fire can do the same thing

Boomstick: But even with his disadvantages if you piss of the blocky miner all I gotta say is RUN and hopefully he won’t catch you

 

* Steve slaying the enderdragon*

 

Wolverine Analyses:

 

Watch Wolverine vs Raiden for a Wolverine Analyses

 

Wiz: alright the combatants are set let's end this debate once and for all

Boomstick: it’s time for a DEATH BATTLE!

DEATH BATTLE!

A block man is walking in the woods holding a canister with hot liquified metal inside it holding a diamond pickaxe, a man with razor sharp nails on every finger walked up to him with some emeralds, then they heard a growl.

Then a muscular man came onto the scene he wore a black and yellow costume with a X on his belt.

Wolverine: Victor, give me back the adamantium, you block head, you better give that back if you know what's good for you.

The block man saw that Victor was gone and then Wolverine gave him an angry stare.

Wolverine: Darn, he got away, I’ll find him later, but right know I got to take care of block head

Wolverine had 3 metal adamantium claws come out of his hands where his knuckles were.

The block man drew out an iron sword

Steve: trust me you rather back down, unless you're as stupid as that monkey suit you're wearing.

FIGHT!

Wolverine and Steve charged at each other the claws clashed with blade making sparks fly, Wolverine then jabbed at Steve, but Steve got out is white shield just in  time. Wolverine and Steve then both traded blows, Wolverine got hit so far and landed into a tree thanks to Steve’s super strength. Wolverine had a slash in his chest, blood was gushing out and it revealed his adamantium skeleton. Steve didn't go very far and he wasn’t bleeding, he didn’t even get a mark, then Steve just shrugged it off.

Wolverine regenerated his wound and was shocked to Steve completely unharmed.

Wolverine: what are you cause you definitely ain’t human bub

Steve: I was about to ask you the same thing, did you crawl out the deepest depths of the caves or something

Wolverine charged and slashed at Steve multiple times followed by a strong uppercut

Steve then retaliated with a strong punch knocking Wolverine into a boulder, then followed that up with a sword slash into his chest the sword stayed in his chest and Wolverine threw Steve into a tree and pulled out Steve’s iron sword and broke it in two. Steve then got angry and shot Wolverine in the leg with his bow and arrow, thanks to Wolverine’s adamantium skeleton it didn’t do too much damage. Steve then put on a potion of swiftness and assaulted Wolverine with five punches then slammed him into the ground. Wolverine then retaliated with a kick to gut and a 3 claw stab to the head, the claws still did not puncture through the blocky miner, then  Wolverine gave him several slashings and continued to assault Steve with a flurry of punches. Steve: this guy is tough I got to go regenerate my health.

Steve then threw a ender pearl into a tree and he ate some steak and drank a potion. Steve took some time to think about his new enemy and ways to defeat, but this did not last long as the tree fell to ground from being chopped down by Wolverine adamantium claws. Steve then thought he was done for but then he pulled out his white shield and let it take the blows from Wolverine. Wolverine continued slashing at it violently and then then finally the shield broke but Wolverine was surprised to see that Steve was gone. But then Wolverine herd footsteps but didn’t see anything he then smelled the air

Wolverine: no use hiding bub

He then grabbed onto an invisible creature and slashed at it continuously then saw it was Steve.

Steve: how did you know I was there

Wolverine: the nose knows

Steve then drank a strength potion, threw a damage potion at Wolverine, and punched him into a mountain, Then punched him a few times and finally threw him into the ground Wolverine then tackled him and slashed at him some more. Steve pushed him of off him and then stabbed him a few times with his diamond sword and then gave him a forward slash to his head and finished his combo with an uppercut to Wolverine’s jaw. Wolverine then disarmed Steve of his sword and threw it into the lake near by

Steve: I guess I’m gonna make a new sword form your metal bones!

Wolverine kicked Steve in his gut and took back the adamantium and Steve drank a potion of waterbreathing, put on his diamond armor and then shot a few arrows into Wolverine’s right hand and tackled Wolverine into the lake he threw the diamond sword in.

Wolverine then entered his berserker rage and started violently slashing and punching Steve, Wolverine then punched Steve out of the water and finished him off with a X slash breaking through the diamond armor, Steve then fell to the ground dead,

Wolverine then took the adamantium.

Wolverine: should’ve gave me back the adamantium when I told you

Wolverine saw a emerald and sniffed it and picked up Victor’s scent, he then went to go hunt for Victor.

K.O.

Alternate Ending

Steve: I guess I’m gonna make a new sword form your metal bones!

Wolverine kicked Steve in his gut and took back the adamantium and Steve drank a potion of waterbreathing and threw a weakness potion at Wolverine, put on his diamond armor and then shot a few arrows into Wolverine’s right hand and tackled Wolverine into the lake he threw the diamond sword in.

Steve then choked Wolverine, Wolverine tried to get Steve’s hands of his neck but Steve was too strong and Wolverine was still weak from the potion, Wolverine stopped struggling and laid limp. Steve was about to get the canister from Wolverine but his potion was running out so he took Wolverine and the adamantium with him to the surface. Steve then saw his dog tags and saw his “name”, Wolverine.

Steve then saw a card in Wolverine’s pocket that noted to kill Victor because he was after the adamantium and wanted to kill Wolverine and his team. Steve dug a grave and wrote, Rest In Peace Wolverine. Then Steve took the adamantium and crafted it into an adamantium sword, then went on a man hunt to find Victor and get his revenge on him.

 

K.O.

Results

Boomstick: Jeez that was brutal, Show it again!

Wiz: Because of Wolverine’s adamantium skeleton, stubborn healing, quicker reflexes, animal senses, and agility, he was able to hang in there against Steve’s obviously superior Strength, slightly better durability in some cases and arsenal of weapons he was able to defeat the Wolverine.

Boomstick: yeah Wolverine couldn't handle Steve’s strength even though he was the superior fighter of the two and even had his adamantium skeleton which Steve didn’t even get near to chipping, but his assaults with magic and brute force did him good in this fight.

Wiz: also in durability they’re both pretty even and have their ups and downs and so do their healing factors as well, like Wolverine is more durable in brute force but with assaults with bullets and blades he can cut easily but his skeleton stays in tact and his healing factor takes away his wounds, and with Steve he can’t be cut through with blades or bullets but with enough strong assaults he can be greatly damaged and his healing factor helps but it’s a long process.

Boomtick: and Wolverine needs his brain  to stay in tact to heal and live, but Steve can’t be cut through making this not a priority, giving Steve more of an advantage, and his animal senses could counter stealth so invisibility doesn’t work in this situation.

Wiz: but Steve could not keep up Wolverine’s assaults and was extremely better  at fighting than Steve could ever be and he won the match mainly because of his skeleton and his superior fighting could help kill Steve because he is less durable to brute force.

Boomstick: even though Steve had him on the ropes, Steve just tried to break off more than he could mine

Wiz: the winner is Wolverine

K.O.

Alternate Results

Boomstick: wait he didn’t get paid, well at least he got a sweet new sword

Wiz: Because of Wolverine’s adamantium skeleton, stubborn healing, quicker reflexes, animal senses, and agility, he was able to hang in there against Steve’s obviously superior Strength, slightly better durability in some cases and arsenal of weapons he was able to defeat the Wolverine.

Boomstick: yeah Wolverine couldn't handle Steve’s strength even though he was the superior fighter of the two and even had his adamantium skeleton which Steve didn’t even get near to chipping, but his assaults with magic and brute force did him good in this fight.

Wiz: also in durability they’re both pretty even and have their ups and downs and so do their healing factors as well, like Wolverine is more durable in brute force but with assaults with bullets and blades he can cut easily but his skeleton stays in tact and his healing factor takes away his wounds, and with Steve he can’t be cut through with blades or bullets but with enough strong assaults he can be greatly damaged and his healing factor helps but it’s a long process.

Boomtick: and Wolverine needs his brain to stay in tact to heal and live, but Steve can’t be cut through making this not a priority, giving Steve more of an advantage, and his animal senses could counter stealth so invisibility doesn’t work in this situation.

Wiz: but Steve won this mainly because of his strength and durability but on a one on one with only a sword he would have harder time fighting and even lose if Wolverine plays his cards right

Boomstick: well Wolverine had Steve wear he wanted him until he choked

Wiz: the winner is Steve