User blog:SuperSaiyan2Link/Sean the Killer 2016

"Sean, honey, time for school!" The impatient bit— I mean, my mother, yelled up to me. I whipped the covers off of me and jumped straight into action.

"But why? It's not like I'm gonna remember anything I learned once I become a killer and hang out with Jeff!" I argued.

"Huh?"

I hated school. But hey, what're you gonna do. Become a killer? Nah, laaaaame! Stare at your walls, it's fun.

"I'm coming!" Sean yelled back down. "But not in the way that you think! I'll be down in a sec!"

"Okay, honey, need help with that?"

"WHAT?! MOM!"

And after that... odd moment, I dashed downstairs and saw my 19 year old sister pack her backpack. Why she was still in school, don't ask me. Anyways, I went to grab some breakfast, but my mom slapped my hand.

"Not now, Sean! This is food for dinner tonight!"

"And you made it now...?" I asked. "You made bacon and eggs at 8:00 in the morning for DINNER?!"

"Of course! Now go catch your bus!" She ordered. I groaned, conveniently stepping out the door at the exact moment the bus rolled in. Cause, hey, plot.

I walked up the stairs of the bus, but turned and looked back at my mom.

"Do I have to go?" I asked her. My mom smiled as the bus driver decided to close the doors.

"Wait, NOOOOOOOO!!!" I screamed as the busssss rolled away, with me in it.

I groaned, walking down the hall of the bus and looking for a seat.

"Hey, over here!" Yelled a nice fellow named Zachary. I looked at him and frowned.

"Why would I sit next to you?"

"So I can push you out of the seat."

"Sounds good." I responded, plopping down next to Zach. He immediately shoved me out of the seat. We laughed.

"I'll beat you up at lunch, yeah?" Zach offered. I nodded.

"Sure! I'll be happy to let that happen!" I agreed, getting up and sitting next to my best friend, who was of no importance to the story whatsoever. Why did I even give him a name.

My first class in school was math. Er, geography. Wait... Yeah, math. Same thing. My worst subject. Though you wouldn't be able to tell, I fail all my classes, so whatever.

To me, math was numbers and letters. And I'm fairly certain that you're supposed to be painting in math class. As you can tell, the teachers don't even know what class they're teaching.

Mr. Rogers, my neighbour and teacher, was already teaching us why X = 2 to the power of 32 or some legit stuff like that.

"Hi there neighbour..." Mr. Rogers said to me. "I hope you don't mind if I ask you a question and embarrass you in front of the whole class?"

"Sure, sounds good."

"What is 7 times 1?"

"A combination of two numbers with the word times in between." I mumbled. Mr. Rogers' face lit up.

"Sean, you actually got a question right!" He gasped. "WHAT A NERD, AMIRIGHT?!"

"Sweet!" I yelled in victory.

"DETENTION." Mr. Rogers screamed. I winked at him and gave him a thumbs up.

"You really think I'm going to detention? No, the plot doesn't have time for detention."

"Sounds legit."

And that was when class ended. Everyone fled to the cafeteria. And, of course, Zach was waiting for me as we planned.

"Ready, you Jeff ripoff?!" He asked.

"Sure thing!" I nodded. Then he instantly kneed me in the gut. I hit the ground.

"Ah... Pain feels better than staring at walls..."

Then, I decided to stand up.

"Your turn?" I offered.

"I'd be glad to help you become Jeff the—"

SMASH! I had already flicked him in the face! Blood burst from his shoe...laces, and it looked like I killed the guy! Darn!

Drawing blood is snazzy n' all, but you have no idea how rad it is to flick someone and make their shoelaces bleed.

"What's going on here?" Somebody asked, barging in. Zach looked up and shrugged.

"May I go to your office?" I asked her.

"So YOU hit Zachary!" The principal gasped.

"What, did you think Zachart hit Zachary?"

And next thing you know, I was getting high in the office, until, of course, my mom conveniently showed up for no reason whatsoever.

I went home early. At least there are some pretty walls at home.

Days later, my mom physically whipped me.

Er, uh...

Days later, my mom physically whipped my into the car, and began to drive off.

"Where art thou going?"

"We're gonna see a green-eyed midget." She coldly responded.

"HAWKGIRL?!" I squealed. My mom smiled and nodded. Just a few moments later, we were there, and Hawkgirl sat me down for a little talk.

"I hear you like walls." She said. "And you draw red scribbles."

"I like drawing them because Ow the Edge." I responded. She nodded and wrote something on a notepad.

"You may now abruptly leave."

"Good, I was gonna do it anyways!" I yelled, slamming some random item down on the floor, and storming out of the room. Mom never brought me back.

That night, Jeff the Killer casually came in and sat beside me. He always does that.

"Those walls are sexy." He said.

"You say that every time..." I told him. "But you're right."

"Wanna be like me?"

"Sounds good— AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAowtheedgeAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

Then I smiled for a while. Pain and walls everywhere. My fantasy came true.

"Well, I'm gonna chill somewhere else." Jeff got up and left. Then my mom decided to come in. She sighed in relief.

"Phew! For a moment I thought your face would be so ugly forever. Glad you changed it."

"Same."

Then I killed her for no reason whatsoever. Could this be the work of the Illuminati? Perhaps, but now back to our grim tale.

Two minutes later...

"BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!" I screamed. "WAAAAAAALLLLLLL LLLLLLSSSSSS!!!"

And according to the book, I'm still out there. But last I checked, I'm not real, so...