User blog:Tewn Lonk/A mid-season in review: Episodes 1-9

Hey there. First of all, thanks for caring enough to actually read this! I know that may sound strange, but I really appreciate any bit of reading, it really helps me continue to pump these out and I always seek critique to improve my writing. As such, I encourage you to leave your thoughts on these fights below so that I may better myself in the future. Without further delay, I'll jump right into the reviews.

Episode 1: Dunban Vs. Shanks
The first of my fights,and one that I'm still rather fond of.

Looking at this from a review perspective, the first thing that strikes me is the thumbnail. I feel it is a very solid TN, only brought down a bit by the ugly white dots on Dunban's right side. An unfortunate side effect of not having been a trasnparent image to begin with, but I don't feel it affects the big picture too badly. I give this TN an 8/10.

As for the actual article! I feel the reasoning for the two fighters to be paired up is particularly strong in its' simplicity. A reader can easily understand the similarities just from the intro alone, and that is a strong point in this fight overall: simplicity. As we continue to read along, we get a pretty solid analysis of Dunban. Reasonable humor playing off of the lore of Xenoblade works with Wiz' bionic arm well, and the more absurd aspects of the world are well-utilized fuel for Boomstick, such as Ether and Zanza. Dunban's abilities are explained well enough, so that a reader can get a firm idea of his capabilities. Nothing is really left out, except for a few feats which will be covered at the end. Moving onto Shanks, I feel the world of One Piece is explained rather understandably, by maintaining a focus only on the lore important to Shanks. Although mentioning other, more important characters is necessary, the attention remains on him. As a result of this focus, Shanks' can be comparerd subtly to the likes of Luffy and co. without needing to outright say it. This analysis also starts a running gag of mine which I've grown to love; Boomstick's constant association of certain elements in fiction being rip-offs of the Force from Star Wars. This little gag works well, I think, and the analysis ends on a strong note by showing some feats but suggesting a large weakness that will be more important later on.

Now onto the fight. I'm not sure a bar was the most character-accurate setting for Dunban, but considering the events in Xenoblade, I don't personally feel it's too far fetched for him to seek one out at least once. This gives a fairly okay setup which ties in strongly to Shanks' arrival. Being a pirate, it's incredibly easy to just slap a wanted poster into someone's hands and start the fight. Not that its' a bad cliche, but I did try to shake it up a bit by making the sum of the bounty the motivator, not the bounty itself. As the fight begins, I feel it's immediately noticable that these two are rather tricky to write, bearing in mind they only have one usable arm each. Early on, I begin having the characters draw blood, using their abilities nearly off-the-bat. This shakes up what would normally be just another sword battle, by adding in the slicing of the building and Shanks' Kenbushoku early on. As Dunban loses his weak arm, the stakes are raised and the fight becomes gripping. This is a strong point of the fight; it certainly doesn't feel like it drags in any one spot. You can imagine the removal of Dunban's arm the end of Act 1, and the second Act ends with the Jaws of Death skill activating. Already, Shanks has exhausted his best tools, so now thereader watches in anticipation to see Dunban's trump card. The finisher is not too drawn out, but its' unique setup helps set it apart from other simple sword kills. The fight ends, and the questions raised concerning Shanks' crew and Dunban's friends are left unanswered.

As for the explanation, I feel I explained my side fairly well. The verdict being probably the most universally acceptable one, as I know many people will consider Dunban far more powerful than I believe. Either way, I think this is the correct result, and my explanation goes over each specific point as to why Shanks falls short. It's not too long, but it doesn't really have to be, considering the amount of material to go over. I like the pun at the end, it's a bit more unique than most sword-fight puns, but it's not amazing.

Looking over my first fight, I honestly feel it still holds up fairly well. Nothing is really particularly outdated, except for the lack of bolding on Boomstick's lines and the rather short fight in comparison to the new standard I have. Other than that, I am proud of this fight. I give this first episode an 8.5/10.