Sans VS Ness

Pre-Analysis

Wiz: Psycics. They can be powerful, and very dangerous.

Boomstick: And these two are some of the strongest. And they've got similar games!

Wiz: Sans, the lazy skeleton from Undertale.

Boomstick: And Ness, the psycic boy from Earthbound. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win.. A Death Battle!

Sans Analysis

Wiz: It is unknown who, or where Sans came from.

Boomstick: Apparently, he came one day with his brother Papyrus and..uh... asserted themselves, according to a shopkeeper.

Wiz: Huh. Well, while his origin is mostly unknown, we do know a lot about his story in the 3 routes that you can take while in Undertale. In the neutral route, He will usually follow the player around, and joke with them, unless you kill Papyrus. At the end of that route, when you reach the Hall of Judgement he will judge you on how you do.

Boomstick: If you kill some monsters along the way, he will say different things. But if you kill no monsters, he...congratulates you?! WHAT THE FUCK? I'd have killed all the monsters. With mah shotgun.

Wiz: Actually, if you do a genocide run, he battles you. And he is the hardest boss in the game.

Boomstick: Oh. Talk about having a hissy fit.

Wiz: Sans' primary weapon in battle are bones. He controls them in patterns with his telekenisis.

Boomstick: He utilizes Gaster Blasters, which may be connected to WD Gaster. Long story. Anyway, Gaster Blasters are things that look like goat skulls that shoot fricking LASERS!!

Wiz: He also can throw you around with his telekenisis and give you a major headache. He also moves extremely fast so when you fight him he dodges everything!(Almost like teleportation) Well, until you beat him.

Boomstick: Sans is a nice guy. He is very laidback. Buuuuuut.. when you piss him off, you're done for.

Wiz: He's a good guy, but he is verrrrrry lazy, and is known to sleep on the job a lot. Also, he only has one single point of HP. But he does have enough determination to keep fighting for a little while.

Boomstick: Still, this is one Skele-Bro you do NOT wanna mess with.

Sans: I'm Sans. Sans the Skeleton.

Ness Analysis

Wiz: In the year of 20XX, The entire human race is extinct. The evil entity Giygas has taken over the world with his incredible psycic abilities. He was so strong, even his physical body was not strong enough to sustain his power.

Boomstick: But don't get me wrong, there were people that fought back. And one of them built a time machine disguised as a meteor. With it the alien known as Buzz Buzz went back 10 years in time to warn the chosen one. The boy named Luke Skywalker. Psyche!!! His name is Ness.

Wiz: Buzz Buzz crashes in Onett, where Ness just so happens to be living in. He meets Ness and tells him what happens in the far-flung future.

Boomstick: He also tells Ness that he is one of the chosen ones. One of four children embodied with Psycic powers, like that kid in The Shining.

Wiz: He tasks Ness with finding the other three children, Paula, Jeff and Poo.

Boomstick: HAH! HIS NAME IS POO?! WHAT WHERE HIS PARENTS THINKING?

Wiz: Ugh.. Buzz Buzz also told Ness to find the Your Sanctuary locations in the world, 8 of them in total. And when you find them, you have the powers of the Earth with you. That's why Buzz Buzz gave him the Sound Stone; to record the melodies that the Your Sanctuary locations give off.

Boomstick: But Ness is no ordinary kid. This kid progressively got stronger overy the course of his journey. He got like CRAZY strong.

Wiz: Ness learned a variety of PK or PSI abilities. PK Fire is when he shoots fire out of his fingertips at a row of enemies, landing many hits.

Boomstick: PK Thunder is a ball of electricity that Ness can control at will. Sure, alone it zaps real good, but Ness can hit himself with it and he becomes like a rocket!! So fricking cool.

Wiz: PK Flash can stun enemies or potentially temporarily blind them. It can make people cry uncontrollably. But it also has a chance of a ONE-HIT KILL! PK Starstorm shakes stars and brings down meteors from the sky!

Boomstick: Brainshock zaps your brain, hypnosis makes you sleep,Healing stops all status effects like poison and PSI Lifeup heals Ness at large amounts. PK Freeze.. freezes. It's not exactly rocket science.

Wiz: But, his most powerful attack, is PK Rockin'. This thing is so powerful, it never misses. It's a psycokenetic wave of yellow, red, and blue colored energy with a hexagonal pattern. It causes explosions of colorful light that damage the enemy.

Boomstick: Ness just doesn't rely on PK/PSI attacks, he can fight well in hand to hand combat! He's able to make weapons out of everyday objects. When you get hit with his baseball bat, it for sure is a home run.

Wiz: He is also very adept with the yo-yo. He's able to pull of great tricks like Around the world, and walk the cat. Yes that's a real trick.

Boomstick: Ness is pretty tough. He's strong enough to damage a dog made of diamonds, fast enough to dodge lightning, and he touched The Universe of Truth, which means... uh I actually don't know. Wiz, do you know?

Wiz: Yes. It means that Ness is semi-omnipotent. He can be wherever he wants, whenever he wants, although I assume this has limitations.

Boomstick: Oh yeah and Ness can teleport. Is there anything he can't do?

Wiz: Well, he can be affected by spores, can be diamondized and can cry uncontrollably. He can also get homesick sometimes because he misses his mom and sister.

Boomstick: Ness is 13, meaning he doesn't have much experience in formal training. But that doesn't stop this badass!

Wiz: Also, Ness is a good kid. He is pure of heart, which was partly the reason he could beat Giygas with the power of the Earth.

Boomstick: With his friends on his side and the power of the world, Ness will never back down.

Ness: We make a great team, don't we?

Pre-Battle

Wiz: All right, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all!

Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLE!!

Fight

Ness is walking along the snowy banks. He smiles with joy.

"Wow. We beat Giygas! Ha ha!"

He passes by some trees that have snow covered on the tops. Suddenly, he senses something.

"Huh? What was that?"

In the shadows, a glowing blue eye suddenly flashes.

"Leave this place kiddo. Or else you'll have a bad time. An' you're a human. Here we kill those."

Ness is shocked at what he just heard.

"Look, I'm just passing through. I don't want any trouble."

The eye speaks back to Ness, and this time, he's serious.

"Well, the thing is, you look just like a human that killed my brother Papyrus."

Ness' eyes widen. He starts to realize how this is going down. He and this person have to fight. The eye steps out of the shadows, revealing his skeleton body, with a blue hoodie and shorts.

"Sup. I'm Sans. You should be burning in hell."

They both square down and prepare for the battle. They jump at each other and they clash!

FIGHT!!

Sans jumps back, and sends a wave of bones at Ness. Ness dodges most of them, but then gets smacked square in the back by a bone.

"Heh"

Ness points his fingertips at Sans. The fingertips begin to glow and catch fire. Then he shoots a flame from them at Sans.

"PK FIRE!"

Sans sends a bone to deal with it. They both explode and Ness teleports behind Sans, ready to swing his baseball bat. But the instant Ness swings, Sans dodges right behind him and kicks him onto the ground.

"Wow I sure put my SOLE into that. Really was a KICK."

"Wow your puns suck."

"So I've been told."

They both rush at each other again. Ness releases a PK Thunder ball and aimed it at Sans.

"Woah. Sparkles."

He summons a Gaster Blaster and swats the electric ball away. Sans then proceeds to summon a swarm of Gaster Blasters. Then as if one, all shoot lasers at Ness. Ness jumps up super high and dodges all the lasers super quickly.

"Not bad kiddo, but I ain't done yet."

Ness smirks. Sans is confused as to why he's smiling

"Me either. Let's continue."

Ness creates a ball of greenish energy and it starts to grow.

"PK FLASH!!"

A blinding light was released by the PK Flash that had exploded in a burst of energy. This act temporarily blinded Sans

"Aaah! I can't see! So bright!"

Ness was preparing to punch Sans, but a Gaster Blaster got in the way and got punched instead. The Gaster Blaster was sent flying into a wall. More Gaster Blasters crowded around Sans to try to protect him. Ness frowned.

"What should I do. Oh! I know! PK FIRE!"

Ness then proceeded to fire a barrage of PK Fires at the Gaster Blasters, destroying every one of them, excluding Sans. By then Sans had recovered from the blinding light.

"Kid, I'd say it's time to finish this."

"If you say so. PK STARSTORM!!"

Just then, a bunch of meteors engulfed in blue flame began falling from the sky. Explosions everywhere, leaving a bunch of dust everywhere making it hard to see clearly.

Ness dropped to the ground and looked around for Sans.

"Did I get him?"

Suddenly Sans appears right behind Ness!!

"It's over."

"Not quite, Sans. PK Rockin!!!"

Ness released a colorful psycokenetic wave at Sans. Unable to dodge it, Sans stare in horror as the wave engulfed him.

"Sorry Papyrus."

Sans was vaporized in the wave. Ness smiles in triumph. Then he walks away

"Whew! What a fight."

K.O!

Post-Analysis

Boomstick: Holy Crap! That was awesome! Roll it again!

Wiz: While it's true that Sans may have had more experience, Ness was just, way way stronger.

Boomstick: Ness' attacks can do way more damage than Sans' can, and Ness was just faster.

Wiz: Sans has this poison/ status effect called karmic retribution. This damages the opponent that has committed sins, slowly chipping away their health.

Boomstick: Buuut, it's uselse's against Ness, since he is a good child. He won't fight unless he has too.

Wiz: In the end, Ness was too strong for Sans to handle.

Boomstick: Looks like Sans got PK Wrecked

Wiz: The winner is Ness